explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1727: Number of Computers

2016-08-31T11:20:22Z

108.162.218.53: /* Explanation */ gravity well link.

{{comic
| number = 1727
| date = August 31, 2016
| title = Number of Computers
| image = number_of_computers.png
| titletext = They try to pad their numbers in the annual reports by counting Galileo's redundant systems as multiple computers, but they're falling behind badly either way.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Rough draft, needs better phrasing and transcript}}
In this comic is a graph of all computers in the world, on a log scale. Also on the page is a graph representing all computers destroyed by NASA by throwing them into Jupiter.

Space probes sent to Jupiter are typically scheduled to deorbit and fall into Jupiter's atmosphere. There are multiple reasons for this, including avoiding contaminating Europa with Earth pathogens, never mind the huge [[681|gravity well]] that would have to be overcome for such a probe to return to Earth.

The caption below the comic humorously implies that NASA's reasons for causing the probes to deorbit is merely to destroy computers for the sake of destroying computers (and failing horribly, given they have destroyed three computers out of >100 billion).

==Transcript==
[A graph is shown, with the x-axis representing time (labeled in years from 1942 until 2030) and the y-axis indicating computer count. There is a line that starts slowly, then rockets up exponentially, eventually reaching the right edge of the graph at ~10 billion, labeled 'Number of Computers created.' On the right, another line appears, this one barely sloping upwards at all, capping out at 4, labeled 'Number of Computers destroyed by hurling them into Jupiter.'

Caption: NASA needs to pick up the pace if they ever want to finish the job.

Title text: They try to pad their numbers in the annual reports by counting Galileo's redundant systems as multiple computers, but they're falling behind badly either way.

{{comic discussion}}

1727: Number of Computers

2016-08-31T11:17:09Z

108.162.218.53: /* Transcript */ typo

{{comic
| number = 1727
| date = August 31, 2016
| title = Number of Computers
| image = number_of_computers.png
| titletext = They try to pad their numbers in the annual reports by counting Galileo's redundant systems as multiple computers, but they're falling behind badly either way.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Rough draft, needs better phrasing and transcript}}
In this comic is a graph of all computers in the world, on a log scale. Also on the page is a graph representing all computers destroyed by NASA by throwing them into Jupiter.

Space probes sent to Jupiter are typically scheduled to deorbit and fall into Jupiter's atmosphere. There are multiple reasons for this, including avoiding contaminating Europa with Earth pathogens.

The caption below the comic humorously implies that NASA's reasons for causing the probes to deorbit is merely to destroy computers for the sake of destroying computers (and failing horribly, given they have destroyed three computers out of >100 billion).

==Transcript==
[A graph is shown, with the x-axis representing time (labeled in years from 1942 until 2030) and the y-axis indicating computer count. There is a line that starts slowly, then rockets up exponentially, eventually reaching the right edge of the graph at ~10 billion, labeled 'Number of Computers created.' On the right, another line appears, this one barely sloping upwards at all, capping out at 4, labeled 'Number of Computers destroyed by hurling them into Jupiter.'

Caption: NASA needs to pick up the pace if they ever want to finish the job.

Title text: They try to pad their numbers in the annual reports by counting Galileo's redundant systems as multiple computers, but they're falling behind badly either way.

{{comic discussion}}

Talk:792: Password Reuse

2016-08-22T19:03:48Z

108.162.218.53:

And now it turns out that Google gives our data to NSA....sigh. [[Special:Contributions/24.7.241.154|24.7.241.154]] 07:58, 11 June 2013 (UTC)Monica

What happened in March of 1997? [[User:MR|MR]] ([[User talk:MR|talk]]) 18:23, 4 April 2013 (UTC)MR

Hi! After consulting Wikipedia's article about March 1997 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1997), I think there are two main incidents Black Hat could refer to:
*The '''Phoenix Lights''', a group of supposed UFOs, turned out to be probably military aircrafts.
*The mass suicide committed by 39 '''Heaven's Gate''' cultists.
Since we know little about Black Hat's life in 1997, we could argue that he was expecting an extra-terrestrial contact or that he was attracted by the ideas of that creed - and that the disillusion brought him his present disbelief in things.
Of course those are just hypotheses, and don't seem to fit the character as we know him...[[User:Inverno1407|Inverno1407]] ([[User talk:Inverno1407|talk]]) 11:30, 15 April 2013 (UTC)
:I honestly believe that he created the Heaven's Gate cult and he views their mass suicide as his crowning achievement in getting people to believe things, it just isn't getting any better than that, so he doesn't believe in anything anymore. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.32|173.245.54.32]] 13:03, 30 October 2015 (UTC)

----
:<br />
:"In the conclusion, Black Hat reveals that the only thing he's doing with all his hacked user accounts is to post slightly inaccurate content on Wiki sites."

This paragraph has been present since this explanation was added. I can't see how it is arrived at from the comic. <small>(So I wonder who [[User:148.87.67.212]] might have been...)</small> [[User:Markhurd|Mark Hurd]] ([[User talk:Markhurd|talk]]) 14:10, 15 April 2013 (UTC)

I removed some slightly inaccurate content from this wiki. It was the bit about Black Hat posting slightly inaccurate content on wiki sites.[[Special:Contributions/86.40.93.217|86.40.93.217]] 00:33, 15 May 2013 (UTC)

Does anyone know if he had anything to do with the article on "taking the piss"?

[[User:Weatherlawyer| I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait]] ([[User talk:Weatherlawyer|talk]]) 16:10, 26 January 2015 (UTC)
----
How does this compare in light of [[792:_Password_Reuse|792:Password Reuse]]? [[User:Saibot84|Saibot84]] ([[User talk:Saibot84|talk]]) 05:06, 6 June 2013 (UTC)

The "March 1997" issue is still a mystery to me. May be a global computer virus attack? I will go through all days on wikipedia. The month summery presents not the solution.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 17:27, 6 June 2013 (UTC)

Conisdering how blackhat loves messing with people, I seriously doubt anything at all hapened in March 1997. He's just messing with us! [[Special:Contributions/189.5.106.228|189.5.106.228]] 02:43, 7 July 2013 (UTC)

Oooo, I dunno. Given Black Hat's odd tastes, *anything* from March 1997 could have caused him to lose his faith: Paul McCartney being knighted, Tom Cruise winning an Oscar, the U.S. Supreme Court hearing arguments on Internet Indecency, India's Ministry of Charity choosing a successor to Mother Theresa, Gene Roddenberry's ashes going into orbit, the Brazil Senate finally allowing women members to wear slacks... Anything!! [[http://www.historyorb.com/events/date/1997/march]]
:Wow, look at this historical CNN page: [http://edition.cnn.com/ALLPOLITICS/1997/03/19/scotus.cda/ http://edition.cnn.com/ALLPOLITICS/1997/03/19/scotus.cda/]. The {{w|Communications Decency Act}} is the most likely item from your list.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 08:21, 2 August 2013 (UTC)
::39 Heaven's Gate cultists committed mass suicide
::If he was upset at causing their deaths or having accomplished their deaths, has little to prove now nor reason to repeat the act, he is on pause; we wait.
::[[User:Weatherlawyer| I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait]] ([[User talk:Weatherlawyer|talk]]) 16:10, 26 January 2015 (UTC)
----
My opinion is that Black Hat referred to Bill Clinton banning federal funding for research on human cloning in March 1997.{{unsigned ip|108.162.242.5}}
:How would that create an hiatus in Back Hat's career?

[[User:Weatherlawyer| I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait]] ([[User talk:Weatherlawyer|talk]]) 16:10, 26 January 2015 (UTC)

Hey! I though I'd throw in the opinion that perhaps March 1997 was a month of personal importance to Black Hat rather than anything societal. If the 1997 coincides with any of those standard "loss of idealism and innocence years" for Black Hat, then I'd say that's pretty likely what Randall was going for. {{unsigned ip|108.162.216.209}}

Hi - the last line about the TV show DIBS is wrong. DIBS came out in 2014 - the comic in 2010. What the last panel is referring to is calling dibs on the TV to play CoD4.

Talk:385: How it Works

2016-02-21T20:27:53Z

108.162.218.53:

I will admit, after I finished Calc 1, I came across this yet again via the random button, and kind of rolled my eyes. Then I read the title text, and this became one of my favorite comics. --[[Special:Contributions/140.198.42.64|140.198.42.64]] 00:19, 20 March 2013 (UTC)

This type of generalization also has a special name called "Stereotype threat". Research shows that women/girls who are good at math (identify as good at math) will do worse on hard math questions when they think (consciously or unconsciously) that her own personal failings will reflect on the negative stereotype. (Real example: a group of professors asked SAT testing body to ask for demographic questions (gender/race) after the test instead of before.) [[Special:Contributions/108.162.254.107|108.162.254.107]] 04:15, 18 June 2014 (UTC)

I don't really think that pi + C is different from just C. Pi is a constant anyway! {{unsigned ip|173.245.48.96}}

in popular culture:it appeared twice in the grade 10 english module in the philippines,and without the correct citation.
p.s. what should i do? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.10|108.162.215.10]] 08:33, 16 July 2015 (UTC)

maybe include the phrase confirmation bias?[[Special:Contributions/108.162.218.53|108.162.218.53]] 20:27, 21 February 2016 (UTC)

1645: Toasts

2016-02-19T16:16:57Z

108.162.218.53: /* The toasts */

{{comic
| number = 1645
| date = February 19, 2016
| title = Toasts
| image = toasts.png
| titletext = Platonic solids for my real friends and real solids for my platonic friends!
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|There may be more jokes and more on the different words.}}
A {{w|Toast (honor)|toast}} is a ritual in which a drink is taken as an expression of honor or goodwill. The term may be applied to the person or thing so honored, the drink taken, or the verbal expression accompanying the drink. Thus, a person could be "the toast of the evening," for whom someone "proposes a toast" to congratulate and for whom a third person "toasts" in agreement

The comic is based on the quote {{w|Champagne for My Real Friends, Real Pain for My Sham Friends}} which, though often attributed to the painter {{w|Francis Bacon (artist)|Francis Bacon}} or to {{w|Tom Waits}}, is a toast dating back to at least the nineteenth century. It is also the entire title of a [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7q9i6KYmzQ song], the {{w|From_Under_the_Cork_Tree#Track_listing|ninth track}} on {{w|From Under the Cork Tree}}, a 2005 album by {{w|Fall Out Boy}}.

The comic plays on a permutation structure between two words (a [[wikipedia:Spoonerism|Spoonerism]]), yielding puns with various effects
In this comic eight persons drink a '''toast''' for their "real friends" and then for some other type of "friends". For the real friend they wish them to have one specific thing. This something is a word (X-Y) that can be split up in two meanings (X and Y), where one of them are then put in front the word friend, to explain what type of friends they are now toasting (often a bad/false type of friend) and then these friends get a wish for having what the word that are left of the original word means: "X-Y for my real friends and real Y for my X friends"

The first example is a typical toast, in Champagne, where this word can be split in the two phonetically similar words Sham and Pain, and the sham friends then get pain. [[#The toasts|Below]] all examples (including the ninth from the title text) are listed with explanation for all words.

===The toasts===
*''Champagne'' sounds like a combination of the two words ''sham'' and ''pain''.
**{{w|Champagne}} is an expensive sparkling wine.
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/sham Sham] friends means false friends.
**{{w|Pain}} is not so nice to hand out.
***So [[Cueball]] toast his real friends in Champagne and wishes real pain to his false friends.
*''Pseudopods'' can be divided into ''pseudo-'' and ''pods''.
**{{w|Pseudopods}} (which translates to "false feet") are temporary cytoplasm-filled parts of the cell wall that are able to change their form in order to move. They are used in some eukaryotic cells to move around or to eat. Most cells that do this are called {{w|Amoeba|amoeboids}}. The {{w|Amoeba (genus)|amoeba}} is a common example.
**{{w|Pseudo-}} (lying, false) is used to mark something that superficially appears to be (or behaves like) one thing, but actually is another.
**{{w|Pods}} or {{w|pod}} is not clearly defined. It could refer to {{w|Glossary_of_plant_morphology#Fruit_types|seedpod}} – a dry dehiscent fruit containing many seeds. It could also refer to the [http://thehungergames.wikia.com/wiki/Pod pods] from {{w|The Hunger Games}} where they are specifically used as the city defense in the last book {{w|Mockingjay}}. It may also refer to the pods that transformed people into emotionless duplicates in {{w|Invasion of the Body Snatchers}}.
***So the blonde girl will give her real friends a special part of amoeba (?) but that is at least better than what her false friend receives – i.e. real pods with intricate ways to kill them.
*''Petticoats'' sounds like a combination of the two words ''petty'' and ''coats''
**{{w|Petticoats}} or underskirt is an article of clothing; specifically an undergarment to be worn under a skirt or a dress.
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/petty Petty] means small (in rank of importance), insignificant or narrow-minded. See for instance {{w|petty crime}}.
**A {{w|Coat (clothing)|coat}} is a garment worn by both men and women, for warmth or fashion.
***So [[Megan]] will hand out undergarments for her real friends and really nice coats for her less important/insignificant or narrow-minded friends (they seem to be the luckier ones here).
*''Loosestrife'' can be divided into ''loose'' and ''strife''.
**{{w|Loosestrife}} is a common name for plants within two different genera (which are not related): {{w|Lythrum}} (example: {{w|Lythrum salicaria|purple loosestrife}}) and {{w|Lysimachia}} (example: {{w|Lysimachia ciliata|Fringed Loosestrife}})
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/loose Loose] in this case means free from restraints, as the opposite of {{w|close friend}}. Loose can also refer to being sexually promiscuous, especially when used as an adjective for people.
**[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/strife Strife] comes from the name of {{w|Eris (mythology)|Eris}} the Greek goddess of chaos, strife, and discord. It refers to a bitter sometimes violent conflict or discord.
***So the "brunette" girl (i.e. similar hair but less dark than Megan) will give her real friends flowers and her promiscuous friend she wishes to end up in a real violent conflict.
*''Ladybugs'' can be divided into ''lady'' and ''bugs''.
**{{w|Ladybugs}} (or Ladybird) is a family of insects common all over the world. They are considered cute: [https://pinterest.com/lisalynnburns/lady-bugs-so-cute/], [http://photobucket.com/images/cute%20ladybug], [http://www.zazzle.com/cute+ladybug].
**{{w|Lady}} is a civil term of respect for a woman, specifically the female equivalent to {{w|gentleman}} or {{w|lord}}, but in many contexts a term for any adult woman.
**{{w|Bugs}} in this case refer to to {{w|insects}} or {{w|arachnids}}
***[[Hair Bun Girl]] will give ladybugs for her real friends (a cute type of bug that most people are not afraid of), and real bugs (beetles, flies or spiders) to her lady friends. This is not necessarily all her female friends, it could be only those that are {{w|Lady#British_nobility|noble}} or at least think they are more important and thus would like to be called lady. No matter what most ladies dislike most types of animals that are commonly referred to as bugs.
*''Single-payer'' can be divided into ''single,'' and payer, a word that rhymes with ''player''. In this case this word is then put together with real to form the word ''RealPlayer''.
**{{w|Single-payer}} refers to single-payer healthcare, a system in which the state, rather than private insurers, pays for all {{w|healthcare}} costs, a system used in several countries, but not so far in the US, although {{w|Barack Obama}} has gone some of the way with {{w|Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act}}.
**{{w|Single person|Single}} refers to a person who is not in a relationship or is unmarried.
**{{w|RealPlayer}} is a cross-platform media player app, developed by RealNetworks. It is compatible with numerous container file formats of the multimedia realm. In the past it has been {{w|RealPlayer#Reviews_and_critiques|criticized}} for containing adware and spyware. This was back from 1999 and up to the 2004 version.
**It is specifically not the word ''{{w|Single-player video game|single-player}}'' that is used! this word could refer to video games that only one player can play at a time, or when choosing to play single-player in a game where more could have played. ''RealPayer'' is not a word in use.
***[[White Hat]] thus wish that his real friends have access to state-funded health care, and all his single friends will get RealPlayer. Maybe he wishes to impress these singles with a free app as a present in the hope that he {{w|Get Lucky (Daft Punk song)|gets lucky}}. (If it has been [[Hairy]] this would have seemed very likely… see [[1178: Pickup Artists]]. White Hat has not previously displayed these tendencies too clearly). As mentioned there have been some issues with RealPlayer in the past, but it has stayed on the market for more than a decade. However, since it has {{w|RealPlayer#Current_Status|recently been change}} into ''RealTimes'' it may not be so cool a gift anyway. Also White Hat might wish to give away the old spy ware version of RealPlayer. But as opposed to most of the special friends, single-friends is not in it self negative, especially not if you are yourself single. So no direct reason to make bad wished for single friends as opposed to sham friends.
*''Tumbleweeds'' sounds like a combination of the two words ''Tumblr'' and ''weed''.
**{{w|Tumbleweed}} is a structural part of the above-ground anatomy of a number of species of plants, a {{w|Diaspore (botany)|diaspore}} (of seeds) that, once it is mature and dry, detaches from its root or stem, and tumbles away in the wind. The tumbleweed's {{w| Tumbleweed#Symbolism|association}} with the Western film genre has led to a highly symbolic meaning in visual media.
**{{w|tumblr}} is a microblogging platform and social networking website
**{{w|Weed}} is a plant considered undesirable in a particular situation but in this case it refers to {{w|Cannabis (drug)|Cannabis}} also known as marijuana and many other names including weed and would be used (again in this comic) as a {{w|psychoactive drug}}, i.e. to {{w|getting high|get high}}.
***[[Ponytail]] thus gives her "real" friends a western movie symbol, that will spread seeds over their house, but with her friends on her favorite blogsite Tumblr she will share her expensive weed.
*''Fauxhawks'' can be divided into ''faux'' and ''hawks''
**{{w|Mohawk_hairstyle#Fauxhawk_variants |Fauxhawks}} copies the style of a {{w|Mohawk hairstyle}}, but without shaving the sides of the head and not extending past the peak of the cranium.
**{{w|Faux}} is a French word for "false".
**{{w|Hawks}} is a common name for some small to medium-sized diurnal birds of prey, widely distributed and varying greatly in size.
***[[Beret Guy]] thus wishes to cut his real friends hair in a very special way, maybe to his liking and thought of as a favor, but not necessarily liked by all his friends, cause although Beret Guy is weird, it seems that those around him are not. His false friends can have a predatory bird (maybe coming after them), but rather knowing Beret Guys love of all things, just as a present of something he likes, like animals.
*'''Title text:'''
*''Platonic solids'' can be divided into ''platonic'' and ''solids''
**{{w|Platonic solids}}: In three-dimensional space, a platonic solid is a regular, convex polyhedron. It is constructed by congruent regular polygonal faces with the same number of faces meeting at each vertex. Five solids meet those criteria, and each is named after its number of faces: Tetrahedron, Cube, Octahedron, Dodecahedron and Icosahedron.
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/platonic Platonic] means ''not sexual in nature'' as in {{w|platonic love}}, which is a type of love that is celibate and non-sexual. Typically friends would not be called platonic, but they are normally also not the opposite.
**{{w|Solid}} is one of the four fundamental states of matter (the others being liquid, gas, and plasma). ''Doing someone a solid'' can also mean ''doing someone a favor''.
***[[Randall]], must be speaking the title text and he wishes his real friends to have material in regular, convex polyhedron shape where as his {{w|platonic friends}} can get any other kind of solid material.

==Transcript==
:[There are two rows of 4 panels each. Each panel shows a different person offering a toast. Each one has some kind of drink in one hand which they hold up.

:[Cueball holding up a wine glass to the right:]
:Cueball : Champaign for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends!

:[A blonde girl holding up a regular glass to the left:]
:Blonde girl: Pseudopods for my real friends and real pods for my pseudo-friends!

:[Megan holding up a drinks glass to the right:]
:Megan : Petticoats for my real friends and real coats for my petty friends.

:[A "brunette" girl (i.e. similar hair but less dark than Megan) holding up a normal glass with a small umbrella in it to the right:]
:Brunette girl: Loosestrife for my real friends and real strife for my loose friends!

:[Hair Bun Girl holding up a wine glass to the left:]
:Hair Bun Girl: Ladybugs for my real friends and real bugs for my lady friends!

:[White Hat holding up a regular glass to the right:]
:White Hat: Single-payer for my real friends and RealPlayer for my single friends.

:[Ponytail holding up a regular glass to the right:]
:Ponytail: Tumbleweeds for my real friends and real weed for my Tumblr friends!

:[Beret Guy holding up a wine glass to the left:]
:Beret Guy: Fauxhawks for my real friends and real hawks for my faux friends!

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hair Bun Girl]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Animals]] 
[[Category:Food]] 
[[Category:Music]] 
[[Category:Social networking]]

1037: Umwelt

2016-02-06T22:01:07Z

108.162.218.53: /* Snake */

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| image = umwelt_the_void.jpg
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
<div class="toclimit-3" style="float:right; margin-left: 10px;">__TOC__</div>

==Explanation==
An {{w|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that one's entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day, although only one is seen.
(Fun Fact: the German word "Umwelt" does not mean anything vaguely similar; it translates in all contexts almost exactly as "environment".)

Information about how the wide variety of data was collected and credit for the viewers who contributed can be found [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/rnst4/april_fools_xkcd_changing_comic/ here].

This comic was released on April 1 even though that was [[:Category:Sunday comics|a Sunday]] (only the third comic to be released on a Sunday). But it was only due to the April Fool joke, as it did replace the comic that would have been scheduled for Monday, April 2. The next comic was first released on Wednesday, April 4.

===The Void===
[[File:umwelt the void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (http://imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===
[[File:umwelt aurora.png]]

One could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

One might also believe that since xkcd is normally a black and white comic, Cueball is colorblind and didn't see anything of interest to him.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon, Texas, Minnesota, Norway, Denmark, Rhode Island (not sure if mobile only or not.)

===Snake===
[[File:umwelt snake composite 1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt snake composite.png|Full size]]

The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Specific AltText for this image: Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit -from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your browser window size.

Location: Texas (on Chrome Version 33.0.1750.154 m), New Jersey, California (on Chrome Version 39.0.2171.95), Maryland, Massachusetts (Safari for iOS), Connecticut (Safari for iOS).

===Black Hat===
[[File:umwelt tortoise 1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt tortoise.png|Full size]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority. It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" — those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===
[[File:umwelt too quiet 1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt too quiet.png|Full size]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: short version — iPhone 5c Safari browser in Texas, iPhone 5 Chrome Browser in Minnesota, long version - Google Chrome browser in Indiana, Windows 8 Laptop

===Pond===
[[File:umwelt pond mobile.png]][[File:umwelt pond wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: The Netherlands and various other countries.

===Galaxies===
[[File:umwelt galaxies 1024.jpg]]
[[:File:umwelt galaxies.jpg|Full size]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is an imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them. This is presumably a reference to [http://www.mariowiki.com/boo Boo], an enemy from certain Mario games who moves toward Mario only when Mario is facing away from Boo.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===
[[File:umwelt xkcd gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" or "/z/ bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===
[[File:umwelt dog ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "{{w|Harrison Bergeron}}."

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===
[[File:umwelt reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [[688: Self-Description|Self Description]] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===
[[File:umwelt somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===
[[File:umwelt twitter.jpg]]

A summary of the content "typically" found on Twitter.

In the tweet feed, there are three tweets about some podcast on the top, followed by the tweet containing link they clicked on to get to the comic, tweets about Rob Delaney, unspecified passive-aggressive tweets, and a tweet from [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horse_ebooks Horse Ebooks] retweeted by one of the users the reader follows.

On the left, the topmost dialog, with profile information, shows that the user has posted 1,302 tweets, but only follows 171 people and has even fewer followers, at a measly 48. This is marked with a sad face, implying that the user wants more followers.

Below that is the "who to follow" dialog, which is written up as consisting of "assholes".

Below that is the "trending tags" dialog for the United States. It is full of tags about word games, tags about misogyny, and tags about Justin Bieber.

Below that is an unidentified dialog full of "stuff your eyes automatically ignore". And finally, on the bottom is the background colour, which is "a really pleasant blue".

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===
[[File:umwelt wikipedia wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt wikipedia mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have had sexual intercourse while on board of an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic.

Two different versions shown, the narrower version (the single panel with all the text) for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===
[[File:umwelt chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===
[[File:umwelt chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} that fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser.

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===
[[File:umwelt chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece. However, the piece in question cannot possibly line up with any corner.

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[[File:umwelt firefox incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers.

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===
[[File:umwelt ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===
[[File:umwelt maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===
[[File:umwelt netscape womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt netscape man.png]]

{{w|Netscape Navigator}} was a web browser popular in the 1990s.

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===
[[File:umwelt rockmelt.png]]

{{w|Rockmelt}} is a social-media-based browser.

Reference to the gospel song {{w|Longing for Old Virginia: Their Complete Victor Recordings (1934)|"There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family}}, later covered by Stephen Stills.

:I run to the rock just to hide my face
:And the rocks cried out, no hiding place
:There's no hiding place down here

It may additionally be a reference to the ''Babylon 5'' episode "And the Rock Cried Out, No Hiding Place," which featured the song.

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===
[[File:umwelt plugin disabled.png]]

When the Google Chrome web browser does not have the required software (called a plug-in) to display a web page's content, it displays a puzzle piece icon and an error message. In this case, Chrome informs the user that the content is impossible to display.

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled, Safari Desktop

===Corporate Networks===
[[File:umwelt corporate general.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate amazon chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate amazon firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate amazon other.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate google chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate microsoft chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate microsoft firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate microsoft other.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate nytimes chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt corporate nytimes other.png]]

These error messages appear if the user is on a network owned by one of the corporations noted. The error message includes a warning against speaking on the company's behalf.

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===
[[File:umwelt military.png]]

[[Cueball]] assumes that anyone using a military network has an important job like watching for incoming missiles. He includes a thank-you to the user for their military service.

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===
[[File:umwelt tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===
[[File:umwelt verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===
[[File:umwelt france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean: french military defeats" (due to a {{w|Google bomb}}), referencing a stereotype of the French:[http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/victories.html][http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm][http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===
[[File:umwelt germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===
[[File:umwelt israel.png]]

Transcript:

בחורה: אמא, פגשתי בחור נהדר! אבל הוא לא יהודי.‏

...

רגע, מה את אומרת, "גם אנחנו לא"?‏

אני לגמרי מבולבלת.‏

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality/ethnicity.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===
[[File:umwelt japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a "{{w|Carnot cycle}}" is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating. The icon on the side of the motorcycle resembles a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Carnot_cycle_p-V_diagram.svg graph of the Carnot cycle.]

Location: Japan

===UK===
[[File:umwelt uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===
[[File:umwelt disasters blizzard.png]]

This comic is aimed at the debate over whether earthquakes or blizzards are harsher conditions to live under.

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===
[[File:umwelt disasters tornado.png]]

This comic is aimed at the debate over whether earthquakes or tornadoes are harsher conditions to live under.

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, Georgia, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===
[[File:umwelt disasters hurricane.png]]

This comic is aimed at the debate over whether earthquakes or hurricanes are harsher conditions to live under.

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Georgia, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia

===Lake Diver Killer===
[[File:umwelt lake diver.png]]

This comic shows a news reporter standing in front of a lake. She is reporting on a serial killer who targets divers. As more divers are sent in to investigate and/or search for bodies, more divers go missing and are presumably murdered.

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===
[[File:umwelt lincoln memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicopter Hunting===
[[File:umwelt helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have {{w|Wolf hunting#North America 2|shot wolves en masse from helicopters}} in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body —including meat and bones— goes wasted as they are sought mainly for their pelts.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===
[[File:umwelt life scientists.png]][[File:umwelt life rit.png]][[File:umwelt life umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===
[[File:umwelt paul revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of {{w|Paul Revere#"Midnight Ride"|Paul Revere}} and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). The comic contains a reference to the {{w|MIT Blackjack Team}}, which entered popular culture via the {{w|21 (2008 film)|film 21}}, and a possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' and/or {{w|Chain of Command (Star Trek: The Next Generation)|popular homage to it via Star Trek}}: "There are four lights."[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt counting cards harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt counting cards mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt counting cards smith.png]]

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt counting cards wellesley.png]]

Both Wellesley and Smith are all-women colleges.

===Giant Box Trap===
[[File:umwelt box trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at the {{w|Christopher Newport University}}, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===
[[File:umwelt chemo.jpg]]
[[Cueball]] has shaved his head in support of people going through {{w|chemotherapy}} but as he is always depicted as a stick figure with no hair who can tell.

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

===Reviews===
[[File:reviews.png]]

The previous strip appears twice when using [[wikipedia:Tor (anonymity network)|Tor]].

Browser: Any using Tor, and reports of seeing it on a Kindle Fire HD

==Transcript==
:[Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given.]

:'''The Void'''
:[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

:'''Aurora'''
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?
:Megan: Hockey's on.
:Cueball: Ok. Later.

:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

:Megan: See anything?
:Cueball: No, just clouds.
:Megan: Not surprised.

:'''Aurora-US'''
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
:Megan: It's cold out.
:Cueball: Ok. Later.

:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

:Megan: See anything?
:Cueball: No, just clouds.
:Megan: Not surprised.

:'''Snake'''
:[Two people standing next to each other. Megan is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

:Megan: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

:'''Black hat'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat. The other is an analyst. Black Hat has a number of terminals attached to his head.]
:Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

:Black Hat: It '''knows''' what it did.

:[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

:'''Too quiet'''
:[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]
:Person 1: It's quiet.

:Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

:[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]
:Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

:Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.
:Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

:'''Pond'''
:[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

:'''Galaxies'''
:[A trio of galaxies.]
:Galaxy 1: He's not looking!
:Galaxy 3: Let's get him!
:[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]
:Cueball: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?
:Megan: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

:'''xkcd Gold'''
:[Cueball holding bat.]

:Cueball: Sorry, but this comic

:[Cueball starts to wind up.]

:Cueball: requires

:[Cueball prepares to strike with bat.]

:Cueball: XKCD

:[Cueball swings at a beehive.]
:GOLD

:[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

:'''Yo mamma'''
:[Cueball yells at a friend.]
:Cueball: Oh yeah? Well you mama's so ''cynical'', her only dog ballast is a ''leash''!
:(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights.)

:'''Reddit'''
:Five seconds ago:
:[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread.]
:You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

:Now: [An image of the xkcd comic page.]
:Five seconds from now:

:You: ..hey

:30 seconds from now:
:[DANCE PARTY!]

:'''Buns and Hot dogs'''
:Cueball: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?
:[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

:'''Twitter'''
:[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse ebooks.]

:'''Wikipedia'''
:[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on The Mile High Club.]

:'''Google Chrome'''
:[A Chrome plugin error page.]
:Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

:'''Chrome/Firefox'''
:[Two people; Cueball is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]
:Cueball: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.
:Ponytail: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.
:Cueball: Oh? What's it called?
:Ponytail: "Firefox".

:'''Google Chrome-2'''
:[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]
:Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

:'''Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing'''
:[Firefox error page.]
:Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you
:[Button with text.]
:Click here to report this incident.

:'''Internet Explorer'''
:[IE error page.]
:IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

:'''Maxthon'''
:Cueball: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

:'''Netscape Navigator'''
:[Two different versions exist: one with Cueball talking and one with Megan with tentacle arms talking.]
:Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

:'''Rockmelt'''
:[Cueball running to laptop.]
:I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

:[Cueball sitting at laptop.]
:But Rockmelt cried out -

:[Laptop shouting.]
:NO HIDING PLACE

:[zoom out.]
:NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

:'''Google Chrome-3'''
:[A chrome plugin error page.]
:Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there '''ever''' exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

:'''Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome'''
:[Chrome error page.]
:Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox'''
:[Firefox error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Microsoft/The Times'''
:[Error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Corporate - Generic'''
:[Error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Military'''
:[Person looking at two browser windows.]
:Cueball: I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

:'''T-Mobile'''
:[Error page.]
:Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

:'''Verizon'''
:[Error page]
:Error: You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

:'''France'''
:[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]
:Cueball: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?
:French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

:French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down Europe for over a decade.

:[Beat frame.]

:Cueball: Touche.
:French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

:'''Germany'''
:[Cueball dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]
:June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.
:Cueball on chairlift: Food!

:'''Israel'''
:[Person on phone.]
:Person (Translation from Hebrew): Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

:'''Carnot Cycle'''
:[Ponytail on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]
:Ponytail: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!
:Cueball: Neat - how fast does it go?
:Ponytail: Depends how cold it is outside.

:'''Great Britain'''
:[Illustration of the Atlantic ocean.]
:American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most ''important'' US states.
:British person: Hey - At least we have free health care and real ale.

:'''Earthquake-Blizzard'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..
:[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]
:Danish: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof - ''AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!''
:Cueball: Come on - it's only three more miles.

:'''Earthquake-Tornado'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!
:Cueball: That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..
:[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]
:Danish: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!
:Cueball: Say the magic words...
:Danish: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!
:Cueball: Thank you.

:'''Earthquake-Hurricane'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!
:Cueball: That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..

:[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Danish is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]
:Danish: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!
:Cueball: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

:'''Lake Diver Killer'''
:[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]
:Reporter: Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered the body of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer."
:Reporter: During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

:'''Washington'''
:[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]
:In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour
:The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln
:Are entombed forever.

:'''Alaska'''
:[A person with a gun chasing a helicopter on the back of a wolf in a snowy Alaskan field.]
:Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

:'''Life in lab'''
:[Newspaper headline.]
:Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab
:[Caption under picture of scientists.]
:"The trick was fuckin'"

:'''American Revolution'''
:Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

:'''MIT'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: I see their admission standards have been slipping.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''MIT Course 15c'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''Smith/Wellesley'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''CNU'''
:[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]
:I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

:'''Dana Farber'''
:[Cueball, pointing towards head.]
:Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, I shaved my head.
:Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

:'''Reviews'''
:Shopping before online reviews:
:[Cueball and Megan stand in a store. Cueball points at a lamp on the table in front of him. There is another lamp on the table behind them.]
:Cueball: This lamp is pretty.
:Megan: And affordable.
:Cueball: Let's get it.
:Megan Ok!

:Shopping now:
:[Cueball points at a lamp on the table in front of him. Megan looks at her phone.]
:Cueball: This lamp is pretty.
:Megan: It's got 1 1/2 stars on Amazon. Reviews all say to avoid that brand.

:[Cueball and Megan are now both looking at their phones.]
:Cueball: This one has good reviews.
:Megan: Wait, one guy says when he plugged it in, he got a metallic taste in his mouth and his cats went deaf.
:Cueball: Eek. What about- ...no, review points out it resembles a uterus.

:[Cueball is still looking at his phone, Megan has hers at her side.]
:Cueball: Ok, I found a Swiss lampmaker with perfect reviews. Her lamps start at 1,300 Francs and she's only reachable by ski lift.
:Megan: You know, our room looks fine in the dark.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.

*The transcript section for this comic also included a note alluding to its extreme length:
: [ [Two people...] ] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))
: [Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake...

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Danish]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:April fools' comics]]
[[Category:Your Mom]]
[[Category:Puns]]

1291: Shoot for the Moon

2015-11-23T18:21:29Z

108.162.218.53: /* Trivia */

{{comic
| number = 1291
| date = November 15, 2013
| title = Shoot for the Moon
| image = shoot_for_the_moon.png
| titletext = Shoot for the Moon. If you miss, you'll end up co-orbiting the Sun alongside Earth, living out your days alone in the void within sight of the lush, welcoming home you left behind.
}}

==Explanation==
The comic and the title text both parody the motivational quote attributed to {{w|Les Brown (speaker)|Leslie Brown}}, which originally says, "Shoot for the Moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars."

In the original form, the phrase "Shoot for the moon" is figurative, meant to inspire people to pursue ambitious goals, reasoning that even if they fail to achieve them, they may still accomplish other great things while trying. The comic and title text, on the other hand, is literally referring to the moon, and using the word "shoot" not in the sense of "aspire" but to mean "fire a weapon at." The comic further explores the humorous motivations for "shooting the moon"; Megan wants to destroy and kill the moon in order to humble it, feeling taunted by its orbiting merrily over her head, and so she inspires her students to physically attempt to destroy the moon whenever possible, only to become sheepish when she realizes the moon is right behind her, as if it were a person who could become offended by what she is saying. This is, of course, a [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RightBehindMe common comedy trope].

The [[title text]] invokes another literal interpretation of the phrase - if a space vehicle aims at the Moon and misses, it will end up in a new orbit, possibly (depending on its velocity) escaping from the Earth-Moon system and following a separate but nearby orbit around the Sun. A solar orbit is very hard, very fuel-intensive, and very lengthy to return from, despite physically meaning you will remain very close to Earth, even close enough to see it with some optical magnification. Thus, as a hypothetical space explorer's life support gradually ran out because his craft could not make it back to Earth in time, he would be taunted by Earth remaining close to him.

==Transcript==
:[Megan stands at a podium.]
:Megan: Students, shoot for the moon. If you miss,

:[A surprisingly lunar-like object is starting to edge into the frame.]
:Megan: '''''SHOOT AGAIN'''''. Keep shooting and never stop.

:[The moon is now almost entirely in-frame.]
:Megan: Someday, one of us will destroy that stupid skycircle. And— ...What? What are you all—

:[The moon is now in frame, lurking ominously in the background.]
:Megan: ...it's right behind me, isn't it? '''''Shit'''''. Everyone act casual.

==Trivia==
*The What if? Question #109 [http://what-if.xkcd.com/109/ Into the Blue] Made a reference to this comment - see the title text on the third picture.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

1570: Engineer Syllogism

2015-08-28T16:07:23Z

108.162.218.53: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1570
| date = August 28, 2015
| title = Engineer Syllogism
| image = engineer_syllogism.png
| titletext = The less common, even worse outcome: "3: [everyone in the financial system] WOW, where did all my money just go?"
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|It can be improved.}}
A {{w|syllogism}} is a logical argument where two or more propositions lead to a conclusion through {{w|deductive reasoning}}. For example, one of the best-known syllogisms is:
# All men are mortal
# Socrates is a man
# Therefore, Socrates is mortal

In this comic, [[Cueball]] is an engineer who is attempting to make the following syllogism:
# I am good at understanding "numbers" (i.e., mathematics)
# The stock market is made of numbers
# Therefore, I am good at understanding the stock market

Since most engineers are purportedly good at math, proposition 1 seems to be true. It is also loosely true that the {{w|stock market}} is made of numbers, but only in the sense that every system can be given a post-hoc numeric characterization; the dynamics of the stock market are primarily human-driven. In this comic Cueball thinks that his skill at math will help him beat the stock market. Little does he know that the system can be unpredictable, so he ends up losing money as the financial instrument he's invested in loses value. This is due to the financial markets being largely controlled by humans making emotional decisions and not some calculable reason or logic. The fact that humans make emotional decisions is alluded to in the [[title text]] of [[592: Drama]].

Even if the propositions "I am good at understanding numbers" and "The stock market is made of numbers" were true in Cueball's interpretation, and even if the implicit premise that understanding a system's components implies understanding the system held, Cueball would still be wrong to conclude that "I am good at understanding the stock market": this would be a {{w|fallacy of the undistributed middle}}. The problem is that proposition 1 seems to say "I am good at understanding all math". However, the "all" is not present, so Cueball may not necessarily understand the math underlying the stock market.

The title text could be a reference to the recent {{w|2015 Chinese stock market crash}} which largely effected most other world financial markets, particularly during the week of August 24-28, during which this comic was published, or more broadly to economic depressions in general. Alternatively, Cueball could cause a global stock market crash if he is an engineer responsible for vital stock market related software and/or hardware. Another alternative meaning behind the title text would be a reference to high-frequency quantitative trading, which relies more on financial technology engineering than sophisticated financial knowledge, which significantly contributed to the {{w|2010 Flash Crash}}.

==Transcript==

:[An white frame with text inside two lying down "{" type parenthesis]
:An engineer
:syllogism.

:[Cueball is at his desk in front of his computer, with his hands on his knees, thinking.]
:Cueball, thinking: 1: I am good at understanding numbers.

:[Cueball takes one hand to his chin, still thinking.]
:Cueball, thinking: 2: The stock market is made of numbers.

:[Cueball lifts both arms from his legs, still thinking.]
:Cueball, thinking: 3: Therefore I-- ''Wow'', where did all my money just go?

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Math]]
[[Category:Logic]]

1570: Engineer Syllogism

2015-08-28T16:05:11Z

108.162.218.53:

{{comic
| number = 1570
| date = August 28, 2015
| title = Engineer Syllogism
| image = engineer_syllogism.png
| titletext = The less common, even worse outcome: "3: [everyone in the financial system] WOW, where did all my money just go?"
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|It can be improved.}}
A {{w|syllogism}} is a logical argument where two or more propositions lead to a conclusion through {{w|deductive reasoning}}. For example, one of the best-known syllogisms is:
# All men are mortal
# Socrates is a man
# Therefore, Socrates is mortal

In this comic, [[Cueball]] is an engineer who is attempting to make the following syllogism:
# I am good at understanding "numbers" (i.e., mathematics)
# The stock market is made of numbers
# Therefore, I am good at understanding the stock market

Since most engineers are purportedly good at math, proposition 1 seems to be true. It is also loosely true that the {{w|stock market}} is made of numbers, but only in the sense that every system can be given a post-hoc numeric characterization; the dynamics of the stock market are primarily human-driven. In this comic Cueball thinks that his skill at math will help him beat the stock market. Little does he know that the system can be unpredictable, so he ends up losing money as the financial instrument he's invested in loses value. This is due to the financial markets being largely controlled by humans making emotional decisions and not some calculable reason or logic. The fact that humans make emotional decisions is alluded to in the [[title text]] of [[592: Drama]].

Even if the propositions "I am good at understanding numbers" and "The stock market is made of numbers" were true in Cueball's interpretation, and even if the implicit premise that understanding a system's components implies understanding the system held, Cueball would still be wrong to conclude that "I am good at understanding the stock market": this would be a {{w|fallacy of the undistributed middle}}. The problem is that proposition 1 seems to say "I am good at understanding all math". However, the "all" is not present, so Cueball may not necessarily understand the math underlying the stock market.

The title text could be a reference to the recent {{w|2015 Chinese stock market crash}} which largely effected most other world financial markets, particularly during the week of August 24-28, during which this comic was published, or more broadly to economic depressions in general. Alternatively, Cueball could cause a global stock market crash if he is an engineer responsible for vital stock market related software and/or hardware. Another alternative meaning behind the title text would be a reference to high-frequency quantitative trading which caused the {{w|2010 Flash Crash}}.

==Transcript==

:[An white frame with text inside two lying down "{" type parenthesis]
:An engineer
:syllogism.

:[Cueball is at his desk in front of his computer, with his hands on his knees, thinking.]
:Cueball, thinking: 1: I am good at understanding numbers.

:[Cueball takes one hand to his chin, still thinking.]
:Cueball, thinking: 2: The stock market is made of numbers.

:[Cueball lifts both arms from his legs, still thinking.]
:Cueball, thinking: 3: Therefore I-- ''Wow'', where did all my money just go?

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Math]]
[[Category:Logic]]