explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

Talk:1365: Inflation

2014-05-12T21:28:18Z

108.162.219.33:

Space Jam! - [[Special:Contributions/108.162.225.147|108.162.225.147]] 04:51, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
[[Special:Contributions/173.245.63.186|173.245.63.186]] 04:54, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117705/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_1
[[Special:Contributions/173.245.63.186|173.245.63.186]] 04:54, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

My first guess was a reference to the [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6zqHKd265E Chaos Dunk], but the specific reference to Michael Jordan makes me doubt that. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.221.61|108.162.221.61]] 01:18, 9 May 2014 (UTC)

Maybe a reference to the 'SH' (for Stephen Hawking) found in WMAP data? http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn18489-found-hawkings-initials-written-into-the-universe.html [[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.85|173.245.53.85]] 23:13, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

I got "basketball" and "Space Jam", but I didn't get why it said Spalding on it. From reading the explanation, I'm guessing it's a brand. Thanks, because I never would have made the connection. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.237.218|108.162.237.218]] 05:29, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

<strike>Why did Randall choose a basketball? A rugby ball or an american football would fit the shape better</strike> [[User:Condor70|Condor70]] ([[User talk:Condor70|talk]]) 06:12, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:Because of the curving lines like a basketball on the image. [[User:Fizzle|Fizzle]] ([[User talk:Fizzle|talk]]) 06:17, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
::Added the reasoning for choosing a basketball to represent the universe [[User:Condor70|Condor70]] ([[User talk:Condor70|talk]]) 08:46, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:::I have never heard of the Basketball version - in DK I have mainly heard of it like a balloon. The link is to a book - could someone find a link to a short article where this analogy is used? Also I agree that if you do not know a basketballs lines you would never think of that from the image - as it much more looks like an American football due to the shape. Of course the Space Jam/Michael Jordan title text makes it clear that it is a basketball. [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 13:11, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
::::The only other reference I could find is [http://csep10.phys.utk.edu/astr162/lect/cosmology/inflation.html]. I remember the analogy from a Discovery Channel program.[[User:Condor70|Condor70]] ([[User talk:Condor70|talk]]) 15:31, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:This is no basketball! The lines on a basketball are different. On a basketball every line intersects exactly 4 times with other lines. {{unsigned ip|141.101.97.203}}
::Looks like a basketball (example [http://tf3dm.com/imgd/l20568-official-nba-spalding-basketball-86751.jpeg]). Remember that the Mollweide projection distorts the lines.[[User:Condor70|Condor70]] ([[User talk:Condor70|talk]]) 15:31, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:::Person two comments above is correct. Take either the east or west hemisphere (according to the orientation of the globe as presented in this comic) and then rotate it 90 degrees (on the globe, not on the silly eliptical projection) and ''then'' you have the basketball I grew up with. Has it changed in the last 20 years? Condor70's linked image doesn't show enough of the ball's surface to be conclusive on this point. Images on Wikipedia seem to indicate the rib/seam pattern may vary by ball manufacturer; the “official” NBA/Spalding ball image there doesn't show enough of the ball's surface either. — Vid the Kid [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.77|108.162.216.77]] 17:07, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
::::The lines are exactly like the example I mentioned. Line 1 makes a complete circle top to bottom, lines 2 and 3 are not circles, but curved, also top to bottom and line 4 is also a circle and intersects all lines twice by going front to back. In the image you see line 4 as a horizontal line, lines 1 and 2 as circles and line 3 is split, partly visible on the left and partly on the right.[[User:Condor70|Condor70]] ([[User talk:Condor70|talk]]) 05:54, 9 May 2014 (UTC)

Should the image not be updated to the current one on XKCD? Then this image could be saved on XKCD and linked to from the explanation on the error. [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 13:09, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

What's a basketball? (explain like i'm five <duck>) [[User:Ralfoide|Ralfoide]] ([[User talk:Ralfoide|talk]]) 14:19, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack!

Megan is not looking at the "actual image captured by the BICEP2 instrument", because BICEP2 has only a 20 degree field of view (targed at the "Southern Hole") http://www.caltech.edu/content/building-bicep2-conversation-jamie-bock {{unsigned ip|173.245.54.73}}
:Correct. The image is from the WMAP.[[User:Condor70|Condor70]] ([[User talk:Condor70|talk]]) 15:32, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

When I look at the comic at xkcd.com, the bottom image is reversed and 'SPALDING' is backwards (and so thus hard to make out). Is this true for anyone else? --[[User:Dangerkeith3000|Dangerkeith3000]] ([[User talk:Dangerkeith3000|talk]]) 15:53, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
: Noted above, I think. Haven't checked out any explanation but I'm betting someone pointed out "but, it'd have to backwards, as viewed from inside", thus Randall reversed it. A pity, because you're right about it being not as readable. (I'm ''used'' to mirror-writing... but combined with the rest of the image noisiness (unflipped) the reversed version comes out more like "Spajjing" or even "Soajjing", to me, the right-way-round one not suffering from inconveniently-placed splodges ruining the effect.) [[Special:Contributions/141.101.89.211|141.101.89.211]] 16:43, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

"''The concept of an expanding universe is often explained by comparing it with a basketball''"
: "Often" ??? I get that a basketball is used in the comic, to allow for the Space Jam joke. But in all the explanations of an expanding universe I've ever seen, nobody has ever used a basketball. It's always been a balloon. Which makes a great deal more sense since a balloon, unlike a basketball, is something folks typically see actually expand. Claiming a basketball is "often" used seems forced here, an attempt to wedge in a unneeded justification for the Comcast's punchline. [[Special:Contributions/199.27.128.84|199.27.128.84]] 17:01, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
::Comcast is offended by your implications regarding their punchline. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.237.218|108.162.237.218]] 05:16, 9 May 2014 (UTC)

If I understand the basketball analogy correctly you can neiter be inside nor outside the ball, so why would it matter if the logo is reversed or not? You can't actually see the entire ball from anywhere in the universe. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.62|173.245.53.62]] 17:09, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:True, but then you'd see the logo edge-on, which would make it impossible to read and ruin the joke. --[[User:Someone Else 37|Someone Else 37]] ([[User talk:Someone Else 37|talk]]) 22:12, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

This could also be a joke on the {{w|Holographic Principle}}, where everything inside a volume (such as the universe or the interior of a basketball) can be encoded into a surface surrounding that volume. Here, Randall seems to propose that WMAP has seen through the universe to its surface, and revealed its true nature. --[[User:Someone Else 37|Someone Else 37]] ([[User talk:Someone Else 37|talk]]) 22:12, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

Is the so-called Axis of Evil relevant here? The gist is that the CMB is spuriously (?) aligned with the ecliptic plane. See Wikipedia for overview (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Copernican_principle#Ecliptic_alignment_of_cosmic_microwave_background_anisotropy), Sabine Hossenfelder's Backreaction blog for details (http://backreaction.blogspot.com/2006/12/anomalous-alignments-in-cosmic.html), and consider adding this png to explanation, please (http://www.phys.cwru.edu/projects/mpvectors/images/paper3/map_teg_3.png). Also, the AoE has a basketball like appearance. [[User:Run, you clever boy|Run, you clever boy]] ([[User talk:Run, you clever boy|talk]]) 01:07, 10 May 2014 (UTC)

Talk:248: Hypotheticals

2014-04-07T03:38:37Z

108.162.219.33:

The reason for marking this page incomplete is itself incomprehensible, while the explanation itself seems perfectly fine. Can we just mark this as complete? [[User:ImVeryAngryItsNotButter|ImVeryAngryItsNotButter]] ([[User talk:ImVeryAngryItsNotButter|talk]]) 03:41, 6 March 2014 (UTC)
:My former comment was "Layout, language, that TV topes are missing, more...". Please do not remove that tag until it's solved. And right now we have some more issues here.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 23:57, 8 March 2014 (UTC)
::Can you elaborate? I don't see anything wrong with the explanation... [[User:LogicalOxymoron|LogicalOxymoron]] ([[User talk:LogicalOxymoron|talk]]) 05:38, 12 March 2014 (UTC)
:::I did not say that something is wrong, I just did say something is missing. Most important is to explain "TV tropes". Most people don't know about this and so it has to be explained.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 19:37, 13 March 2014 (UTC)
::::The comic itself has nothing to do with TV tropes, so no explanation is needed. 03:38, 7 April 2014 (UTC)
I think the interpretation that someone appears in your room is the one intended. The assumption is that the reader is alone, at their computer and Randall is asking them to consider the possibility of somebody breaking out of a hypothetical situation next to them. However I think the iterative nature of a hypothetical situation about hypothetical situations is the important part of the title text. [[User:Seanybabes|Seanybabes]] ([[User talk:Seanybabes|talk]]) 06:00, 9 March 2014 (UTC)
I agree. The title-text is attempting to cause a hypothetical person to *actually* break into your room by making you imagine somebody breaking out of the hypothetical situation you are imagining about somebody breaking out of a hypothetical situation. [[User:LogicalOxymoron|LogicalOxymoron]] ([[User talk:LogicalOxymoron|talk]]) 05:38, 12 March 2014 (UTC)
:I disagree - that would be to break into your room. Look at what happens to beret guy who eats ice with a "friend" who breaks out of the situation beret created! Beret would be stunned and then probably cease to exist :-) [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 20:43, 5 April 2014 (UTC)

1310: Goldbach Conjectures

2014-04-07T03:29:35Z

108.162.219.33: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1310
| date = December 30, 2013
| title = Goldbach Conjectures
| image = goldbach_conjectures.png
| titletext = The weak twin primes conjecture states that there are infinitely many pairs of primes. The strong twin primes conjecture states that every prime p has a twin prime (p+2), although (p+2) may not look prime at first. The tautological prime conjecture states that the tautological prime conjecture is true.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Goldbach's conjecture}} and the {{w|Twin prime|twin prime conjecture}} are unsolved problems in mathematics relating to {{w|prime numbers}} (numbers greater than 1 whose only {{w|divisors}} are 1 and itself). A claimed proof of {{w|Goldbach's weak conjecture}} is currently under review.

Randall is riffing on the relationship between "strong" and "weak" logical statements, which are an interplay between the boldness or usefulness of a statement and the ease with which it might be proven to be true. For example, if Goldbach's conjecture (given in the comic under the label "strong") could be proven to be true, it would automatically imply that Goldbach's weak conjecture (given in the comic under the label "weak") is also true, because any odd number greater than 5 can be expressed as 3 (a prime number) plus an even number greater than 2 (which, per the strong conjecture, would itself be the sum of two prime numbers), resulting in a way to express the original odd number as the sum of three prime numbers. The weak conjecture does not, however, imply the strong conjecture.

Mathematicians have been solving related problems that are "weaker" than the weak conjecture, and working towards "stronger" ones. For example, in 1937 the weak conjecture was proven for odd numbers greater than 314348907. In 1995 a version was proven based on the sum of no more than seven prime numbers, and in 2012 the ceiling was lowered to five primes. In 2013 the weak conjecture was claimed proven for numbers greater than 1030, while all numbers below 1030 have been verified by supercomputer to satisfy the conjecture; these together imply that the weak conjecture is true (although there is no ''general'' proof of it for all numbers). Goldbach's strong conjecture remains unsolved.

This comic plays on the "strong" and "weak" naming of Goldbach's conjectures by extending it to further degrees of strength or weakness. The "very weak" and "extremely weak" conjectures are indeed implied by Goldbach's weak conjecture, just as the weak conjecture is implied by the strong one. The "very strong" and "extremely strong" conjectures are extensions of Goldbach's strong conjecture, even as it is an extension of the weak conjecture. However, the "very weak" and "extremely weak" conjectures are so obviously true that they are hardly worth stating, while the "very strong" and "extremely strong" conjectures make such bold claims that they are obviously false.

Moreover, the "extremely weak" and "extremely strong" conjectures contradict each other, even though they're both derived (albeit in opposite directions) from the same initial conjectures. Therefore, the "extremely strong" conjecture could not possibly imply (however indirectly) the validity of the "extremely weak" conjecture, as it would if proved true.

The title text refers to the twin prime conjecture, which states that there are an infinite number of pairs of primes that differ by 2, and then applies the same spectrum of "weak" and "strong" statements to it.

[[Randall]]'s weak twin prime conjecture states that there are an infinite number of pairs of primes. This is clearly true. Per {{w|Euclid's theorem}}, there are an infinite number of primes. Unlike the actual twin prime conjecture (which specifies a distance of two), this conjecture does not specify a required distance. Thus, any pair from the infinite set of primes suffices. An example is 5 and 13.

His strong twin prime conjecture states that every prime is 2 less than another prime. This statement is obviously false, as this would mean that every odd number and every even number is prime: since 2 is prime, therefore 4 is prime, therefore 6 is prime, etc.), thus Randall's humorous {{w|hedge (linguistics)|hedge}} that some prime numbers "may not look prime at first".

The tautological prime conjecture states that it itself is true, while making no statement about primes. It is not technically a {{w|tautology}} but more of a plain assertion. Randall has mentioned tautologies before in [[703: Honor Societies]].

==Transcript==
:'''Goldbach Conjectures'''
:'''Weak'''
:Every odd number greater than 5 is the sum of three primes
:'''Strong'''
:Every even number greater than 2 is the sum of two primes
:'''Very weak'''
:Every number greater than 7 is the sum of two other numbers
:'''Very strong'''
:Every odd number is prime
:'''Extremely weak'''
:Numbers just ''keep going''
:'''Extremely strong'''
:There are no numbers above 7

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Math]]

1349: Shouldn't Be Hard

2014-04-04T01:27:54Z

108.162.219.33: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1349
| date = March 31, 2014
| title = Shouldn't Be Hard
| image = shouldnt_be_hard.png
| titletext = (six hours later) ARGH. How are these stupid microchips so durable?! All I want is to undo a massive industrial process with household tools!
}}

==Explanation==

This comic refers to a sentiment sometimes expressed by computer users that "what I'm trying to do is really simple — it shouldn't be hard." The statement demonstrates an assumption that because the desired action is conceptually simple, it must therefore be simple to implement. There is a logic to this line of thinking, but in reality, as the off-screen character notes, a computer is a very complicated set of components which effectively can't do ''anything'' (simple or complex) until someone has programmed the functionality into it. Even more abstractly, a random silicon crystal can't do anything at all until someone has applied a complex industrial process to it that allows it to read and execute computer code in the first place.

In terms of a user-interface, the "simplicity" of executing a given task may be more a function of the perceived utility and frequency-of-use of that function, and less a function of its conceptual "simplicity". For example, changing the colour of the font in a word processor is often simpler than changing the colour of the background/page, even though changing colours of two parts of the document would appear equally "simple" in concept. The different implementation is a design choice by the programmer most likely on the basis that the intended user is considered more likely to want to change the font colour than to change the page colour.

This sentiment equally applies to computer programmers: most commonly when they are just beginning to learn a new computer language. Sometimes because of difficulties with the syntax rules of the language or similar problems, a programmer may spend a long time trying to get the computer to do a simple action, such as display a message on the screen, or ask the user for a number. This is also true when a programmer is working in a language which doesn't have an easy way to do something that might be simple in another language.

The off-screen character points out that computers were "just carefully organized sand". Modern computer chips are made largely of {{w|silicon}} crystals, chemically a part of {{w|silicon dioxide}} crystals that compose the majority of sand. The character puts Cueball's goal in perspective by pointing out the large amount of complexity required to make, what is essentially sand, do even the simplest of computational tasks.

The punchline of the comic is that, after considering these words of wisdom for a panel, instead of the anticipated response of Cueball coming to the realization that the off-screen character is right, and working even harder to solve his problem, Cueball instead succumbs to his annoyance and sets out to destroy his computer (which he characterizes as turning it "''back'' into sand"). The off-screen character helpfully offers to get a blowtorch so that Cueball can melt the computer down into simple compounds and elements.

The title text sees Cueball again frustrated with a task he considers "simple" (destroying the computer). Cueball appears to be oblivious to the irony in his statement that he is having trouble destroying something with household tools that required very large machines and an industrial process to create. This might be compared to trying to undo a steel weld by lighting a wooden match and trying to melt the weld with it. This points out the irony that destroying the processor is even harder to do than the task from the first picture.

The melting point of silicon is 1,414°C. Although a typical butane blowtorch that might be found in a kitchen has a maximum temperature of 1,430°C, that temperature is at a very small point and rapidly cools. Hence it is unlikely that you could focus sufficient heat with a kitchen appliance blowtorch to actually melt silicon.

The apparently simple task Cueball is trying to complete may express Randall's frustration in the creation of the crowdsourced comic xkcd 1350, which was launched the next day and initially contained a large number of bugs.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is typing on a laptop.]
:Cueball: What I'm trying to do is really simple.
:Cueball: It shouldn't be hard.

:Offscreen: All computers are just carefully organized sand. '''''Everything''''' is hard until someone makes it easy.

:[Cueball sits back and pauses.]

:[Cueball picks up and examines the laptop.]
:Cueball: Maybe I should turn this one '''''back''''' into sand.
:Offscreen: I'll find a blowtorch.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Computers]]

1350: Lorenz

2014-04-02T22:59:09Z

108.162.219.33: /* Transcript */

{{comic
| number = 1350
| date = April 1, 2014
| title = Lorenz
| image = 1350_lorenz_loop.png
| titletext = Every choice, no matter how small, begins a new story
}}

{{incomplete|All possible dialogues are not yet accounted for}}

==Explanation==
This comic is an April fools comic with crowd sourced content. Since April 1st 2014 was a Tuesday, this comic is not in the normal sequence Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

This comic is dynamic and needs interaction by the viewer. Initially there was a bug when using the URL <nowiki>http://www.xkcd.com/</nowiki> or even <nowiki>https://xkcd.com/</nowiki> and only <nowiki>http://xkcd.com/</nowiki> did work. <nowiki>http://xkcd.org/</nowiki> and <nowiki>http://www.xkcd.org/</nowiki>, don't seem to work.

{{w|HTTP cookie|Cookies}} are required to see this page properly.

It appears that new panels may be generated by Randall in near real time as user suggestions to dialog is submitted. The dialogue options are likely based on click-through rates and hence will change over day based on which choices are clicked most using {{w|A/B_testing|A/B measurement techniques..}} This will mean that the most popular choices for dialogue line will prevail as the statistics build up. In some cases, dialogue line options do not depend on the continuity of the storyline followed, suggesting that some parts of the story are planned. For example, do several of the storylines involve one of the two main charachters waking up and for instance telling the other character, “I had the strangest dream…” or even reliving the dream again. This may be due to common submissions across storylines as well.

Every panel has a "permalink" option which generates a unique URL for all the choices made by the reader -- so for example http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:26c8dcea-b9aa-11e3-8002-002590d77bdd will take you to a particular place in the selected choices.

The title 'Lorenz' is referring to {{w|Edward Norton Lorenz}} who among other subjects was famous for {{w|Chaos theory}}. The title is a reference to that the story line of today's comic will include most (all?) of the user submitted dialogue and hence will in nature be chaotic. In addition, the title text, "Every choice, no matter how small", is a reference to the butterfly effect, a phrase coined by Edward Lorenz to describe how a small initial change can lead to wide variations in outcome in a chaotic system.

This comic is an example of a {{w|Choose Your Own Adventure}} story.

Many of the storylines involve Pokemon battles featuring Pikachu, a very popular pokemon. Pikachu uses a number of different moves, none of which are from the Pokemon games. These moves are labelled as "Not very effective".
Variably, Pikachu uses the following moves:
Granite - Pikachu appears atop a granite platform.
Faceless - Pikachu's face disappears.
Thief - Pikachu is wearing hat guy's hat.
Ink - Pikachu is covered in ink.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:[An accurate transcript will be impossible to create because the comic changes over time..]

There are many options. Not everyone will see the same options. We are trying to capture as many options as possible in the transcript below. '''The order and options has changed since the transcripter captured the dialogue'''....The dialogue is likely based on click-through rates and hence will change over time based on which choices are clicked most using {{w|A/B_testing|A/B measurement techniques..}}

Often, when a panel is without any choices to make, there is only the option "Continue" to see the next panel.

'''1st Pane:''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:be7a3304-b685-11e3-8001-94de80a03a29 permalink]) 
Hat Guy:
* Refresh... No new email... Refresh .. No new tweets... Refresh...
* These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game.
* These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game. [There are two completely separate branches with this same text. In one of them, it's written "i'll" in lowercase rather than "I'll".]
* Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on.
* Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays.
* Gravity. Lots of it.

:'''2nd Pane: Refresh Branch''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39 permalink]) 
:Dave:
:* So you're still refusing to use Facebook?
:* Wanna build a snowman?
:* Hey. I hear Godot is in town. Wanna try to meet him?
:* You know. Your car's on fire.

:'''2nd Pane: Stupid Tiles Branch''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:79f036ac-b9a0-11e3-9003-94de80a03a39 permalink]) 
:[Dave visits Hat Guy.]
:Dave:
:* There's something weird out on the lawn.
:* There's a dinosaur at the door.
:* I heard home depot has 1024 bathroom tiles.
:* I think I saw a "4096" tile outside somewhere.

::'''3rd Pane: Something Weird Branch''' 
::Hat Guy:
::* This is an apartment. We don't have a lawn.
::* I have a lawn?
::* I hope it's not a bobcat this time.
::* If you reprogrammed the squirrel laser to target hipsters again...

:::'''4th-5th Panes: Apartment Branch''' 
:::[Hat Guy and Dave leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
:::Dave:
:::* OK, two weird things.
:::* I can see a creeper down there.
:::* Is this 1-1 from Mario?
:::* See? It's like a glitch in the Matrix.
:::* This isn't where I left that...

::::'''6th Pane: Two Weird Things Branch''' 
::::Dave:
::::* I count three.
::::* Why is there a gap here?
::::* Who tiled the moat?

::::'''6th Pane: Creeper Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy: Damn Griefers.

::::'''6th Pane: Mario Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave pass by a tree.]
::::Dave:
::::* Why does that tree looks fake?
::::* Actually, it's the final castle. Grab your Fire Flower!
::::* It's over this way.
::::* I've never been this far before!

:::::'''7th-11th Panes: Fake Tree Branch''' 
:::::Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
:::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Theft"!
:::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
:::::Narrator: ...
:::::Pikachu: Um...

:::::'''7th Pane: Never This Far Branch''' 
:::::Dave: Are you going insane again?

::::'''6th Pane: Matrix Glitch Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* How far can we go?
::::* What the fuck?!
::::* How... How do we get everything back?

:::'''4th-5th Panes: Lawn Question Branch''' 
:::[Hat Guy and Dave leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
:::Dave:
:::* Hmmm, did you order a moat?
:::* I don't remember this being here.
:::* Look how deep it goes!
:::* It looks like I can see Moria from here.

::::'''6th Pane: Order Moat Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* It helps keep bobcats out.
::::* Of course. All cool kids have moats in their yards.
::::* I don't have the best rerlationship with my mailman.
::::* Yep. Delivered in two days, courtesy of Amazon Prime.

::::'''6th Pane: Don't Remember Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* It has begun! That's one of the first holes in reality.
::::* I wanted to jump over the massive sinkhole, but nooo, someone just had to find out what was down there.
::::* Oh, I had the moving company install it last week.
::::* We poop in it.
::::* Finally got you out of the damn house.

:::::'''7th Pane: Hole in Reality Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* I've been working on a theory that 2048 is a tool for the old ones to open up portals to this reality.
:::::* What about black holes? Those don't count?
:::::* We must go deeper.

::::::'''7th-13th Panes: Damn House Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
::::::Narrator: ...
::::::Pikachu: Um...
::::::Pikachu: Well then.
::::::Pikachu: I might have left surprises in that direction.

::::'''6th Pane: Look How Deep Branch''' 
::::Dave:
::::* I wonder if we can get someone to fall in?
::::* I'm going in. You can come if you want to. I think I see stars down there.
::::* That was a missing opportunity.
::::* I should come outside more often.

::::'''6th Pane: Moria Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* You see Moria from everywhere, Dave.
::::* Yeah, who did you think gave them a balrog?
::::* Moria is an anagram of Mario!

:::::'''7th-10th Panes: Moria Everywhere Branch''' 
:::::Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
:::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
:::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
:::::Narrator:
:::::* Google Maps didn't warn me of this.
:::::* Enemy Pikachu used "The Discrete Metric"!
:::::* Gathered the ink!

::::::'''11th-21th Panes: Google Maps Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Uplift!"
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Cute Face!"
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Faceless"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Where's Twitch when I need help?
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Abandonment"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...

::::::'''11th-15th Panes: Discrete Metric Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Extrude"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: ...
::::::Pikachu: Um...
::::::Pikachu:
::::::* Now I only have Struggle left. Tie?
::::::* We are the knights who say Ni!
::::::* What is even going on here?

:::::::'''16th Pane: Struggle Branch''' 
:::::::Pikachu: No fair!

::::::'''11th-13th Panes: Gathered Ink Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Granite"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...

:::::'''7th-10th Panes: Balrog Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* One does not simple "give" a balrog.
:::::* What? You weren't using it!
:::::* Gift-wrapping's the hardest part.

:::::'''7th Pane: Anagram Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy and Dave pass by a tree.]
:::::Dave: Not idly do the leaves of Lorien fall.

:::'''4th-12th Panes: Bobcat Branch''' 
:::[A giant hole appears and they fall into it.]
:::Hat Guy and Dave: Aaaaa...
:::[Hat Guy wakes up.]
:::Hat Guy: Gasp [Goes to his desk.]
:::Hat Guy: Yawn [Sits at his desk.]
:::Hat Guy:
:::* Might as well clear more tiles.
:::* Definitely not going outside today.
:::* Thank God it wasn't a bobcat.
:::* Hmmm... I should buy a shovel.

::::'''13th Pane: Clear More Tiles Branch''' 
::::[Dave visits Hat Guy again.]
::::Dave:
::::* Um, there's a hole in your lawn...
::::* There's someone at the door looking for you.
::::* I made an apple pie.
::::* If you want to do that, I'm rebuilding my bathroom this afternoon.

:::::'''14th Pane: Hole in the Lawn Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* If it doesn't lead to a 1024 tile, I'm leaving.
:::::* Damn bobcats.
:::::* I just had a dream about that.

::::::'''15th-16th Panes: Damn Bobcats Branch''' 
::::::Dave:
::::::* Well it was here...
::::::* I don't think it was bobcats this time. Unless they have backshoes...

::::::'''15th-22th Panes: Dream Branch''' 
::::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside again and fall in the hole again~.]
::::::Hat Guy and Dave: Aaaaa...
::::::[Hat Guy wakes up, leaves the bed and finds a boomerang.]
::::::Hat Guy:
::::::* It looks like is [sic] fell from space.
::::::* I hope this isn't just another one of those dreams that keeps coming back at you.
::::::* I hope this was not thrown by a bobcat.

:::::::'''23th-26th Panes: Space Branch''' 
:::::::[Hat Guy throwns the boomerang away and it hits something.]
:::::::Crash!
:::::::[Hat Guy runs away.]

:::::::'''23th-34th Panes: Coming Back Branch''' 
:::::::[Hat Guy throws the boomerang twice, only for it to return to him both times.]
:::::::Hat Guy: Hm. I was expecting a shark.
:::::::[Hat Guy throwns the boomerang again, and it returns to him again.]

:::::::'''23th-30th Panes: Thrown by Bobcat Branch''' 
:::::::[Hat Guy throws the boomerang, only for it to return to him .]
:::::::Hat Guy: There's a mesage written on it.
:::::::[Hat Guy throws the boomerang again. It hits something.]
:::::::Crash!
:::::::[Hat Guy runs away.]

::::'''13th Pane: Thank God Branch''' 
::::Dave:
::::* You just got a package. It's by the door.
::::* Why is there a bobcat on your lawn?
::::* There's somewhere [sic] weird out on the lawn.
::::* Hey do you know why there's a giant hole in the yard?

::::'''14th Pane: Something Weird Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* This seems familiar.
::::* Hold up. I need to get my wingsuit first.
::::* I hope it's not a giant hole.
::::* I have a bad feeling about this.

::::'''15th-18th Pane: Familiar Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside.]
::::Hat Guy: I hope it's not a velociraptor.

::::'''15th-18th Pane: Hope Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside. They pass by a tree.]
::::Dave: How disappointed are you?
::::Hat Guy:
::::* I was expecting a bobcat.
::::* Oh? That's the other tree.
::::* Eh, not that much.

::::'''14th-16th Panes: Do You Know Why Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside.]
::::Hat Guy: I swear if it's a bobcat.
::::Hat Guy:
::::* Why did you bring me here?
::::* This dream has been looping for years, and yet we never tire of it. Why is that?

:::::'''17th Pane: Dream Loop Branch''' 
:::::[There is a gap in the ground. Hat Guy jumps over it, Dave looks into it.]

::::'''13th-14th Panes: Buy Shovel Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy looks at his screen wondering.]
::::Hat Guy:
::::* Wow! Shovels sure are expensive!
::::* Shovels can't be actually made out of two sticks and a row of rocks?
::::* How can there be 36 types of shovel??!
::::* These prices are insane! I wonder if you can rent a shovel...

:::::'''15th-18th Panes: Sticks and Rocks Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy is wondering more. Dave comes. They connect their laptops. Dave is wondering. Hat Guy tries something at Dave's laptop.]

:::'''4th-5th Panes: Squirrel Laser Branch''' 
:::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside.]
:::Hat Guy:
:::* Let's just say we won't have to worry about parking.
:::* No, now they're just wearing wigs ironically.
:::* Things may have gotten out of control a little.
:::* At least it improved their haircuts.

::'''3rd Pane: Bathroom Tiles Branch''' 
::Hat Guy:
::* But how many bathrooms?
::* That's 2^5 more than Ikea, I need to see for myself.
::* Let's go, I can keep playing on my phone on the drive.
::* Pfft. Amateurs. Let's go mock them.

::'''3rd Pane: Dinosaur Branch''' 
::T-Rex:
::* Self-doubt crippled my arms. Can I have yours?
::* I need a hand!
::* Did you think he was joking?
::* Sorry for just barging in, I couldn't reach the doorbell.

:::'''4th Pane: Crippled Arms Branch''' 
:::T-Rex:
:::* Never answer your mobile phone while I am addressing you!
:::* Also, have you heard about Tumblr?
:::* Also I have some trenchant observations on language and philosophy to make.
:::* It's not like you're using them.

::::'''5th Pane: Mobile Phone Branch''' 
::::[T-Rex is going to step on a house.]
::::T-Rex:
::::* I think you just entered a dead zone.
::::* Kids these days.
::::* Die you monster.

:::::'''6th Pane: Dead Zone Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, goes outside and finds a boomerang.]

:::::'''6th Pane: Kids These Days Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, and goes back to his computer.]

:::::'''6th Pane: Die You Monster Branch''' 
:::::[Dave is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, and starts singing.]
:::::Dave: [Singing] ''I woke up like this.''

::::'''5th-11th Panes: Language and Philosophy Branch''' 
::::[T-Rex is going to step on a house.]
::::* T-Rex: Also, your brain is like this house.
:::: [Hat Guy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream and goes back to his computer.]

:'''2nd Pane: Stupid Tiles Branch''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:ffdd8916-b9a7-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd]) 
:[Dave visits Hat Guy.]
:Dave:
:* What's with those tiny games you keep playing, anyway?
:* Isn't that sort of meaningless?
:* Up for a dangerous experiment with no pay?
:* You won't believe what just fell off of your roof.

:'''2nd-3rd Panes: Political Thing Branch''' 
:Laptop: "...and let's go live to the debate."
:[Two politicians are debating on TV.]
:Politician 1:
:* In contrast to my oppponent, who I quote, "Never liked Firefly much to begin with."
:* ...but even if you tied enough birds to the car, would you get them to take off in unison?
:* And if elected, I vow to win this war on Christmas once and for all!
:* I agree with my opponent all all [sic] issues and I think his economic plan is fantastic!

::'''4th Pane: Tied Birds Branch''' 
::Politician 2:
::* Tie a predatory bird to the car with a somewhat shorter rope so that it will scare off the rest of the birds without being able to reach them.
::* Training. That's why I support the "Airlift Act", which would put more resources into the hands of bird educators everywhere.
::* By opening and closing an umbrella near them.
::* One word: Fiscal hawks.

:::'''5th Pane: Airlift Act Branch''' 
:::Politician 1:
:::* But is "Airlift" an acronym?
:::* But you must agree that a bitd in the hand is worth more than three educators in the bush.
:::* Incredible!
:::* Wait... Is that like people who educate birds, or birds that teach?

::::'''6th Pane: Airlift an Acronym''' 
::::Dave:
::::* There are birds outside tied to a car.
::::* The owls in our barn are forming a union.
::::* Or course: Avian Implemented Reuseable Lifter and Ingenuous Flight Technology!

:::::'''7th Pane: Car Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* Cool, let's see who we should vote for.
:::::* I know who I'm voting for.
:::::* How many birds?

:::::'''8th-9th Panes: How Many Branch''' 
:::::Dave:
:::::* I call her "Serenity."
:::::* So when you said birds...

:::::'''10th-13th Panes: You Said Birds Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* Wait. The birds are inside!?
:::::* I needed to escape from politics anyway.

:::::'''14th-19th Panes: Birds Inside Branch''' 
:::::White Hat: Want to forget your dreams? There's a pill for that!

:'''2nd-3rd Panes: BSD Branch''' 
:[Hat Guy is confused, staring at his laptop.]
:Hat Guy: ??
:Hat Guy:
:* Now I just need to look up what a "beard error" is...
:* Wait. What's on this other partition?
:* Why is Python importing Skynet?
:* My keyboard has to support SSH over USB?

::'''4th-7th Panes: Beard Error Branch''' 
::[Hat Guy has ?? next to his head to signify confusion. [[Dave]] walks in. (continue) Dave is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. The two stop typing. Dave has ??? next to his head. Dave had stepped back while the character is checking on Dave's laptop computer. The character is holding something rectangular.]
::Dave:
::* The USB cable appears to be mono-directional.
::* Kernel mites?
::* I'm not sure rubbing butter on it will help
::* Yep. It's haunted.

:::'''8th-12th Panes: Rubbing Butter Branch''' 
:::[Dave and Hat Guy are handling their computers more aggressively.]
:::Hat Guy: ARGH!
:::[They both stop. Hat Guy walks away, his chair turned 180 degrees. Pushing aside the chair, the character returns with a fiery blowtorch while wearing goggles.]
:::Dave: [holding up a finger] Um.
:::[Hat Guy's computer was so burned, not only steam is coming out of the computer, but even the desk is noticeably burnt. The cable (apparently also burned) hangs from Dave's laptop computer. The used blowtorch is clumsily laid sideways be the side of the desk. Both Hat Guy (whose goggles are pushed off his eye) and Dave are looking at the calamity. The chair is almost out of view. The goggles are on the floor while the chair is nowhere to be seen. Dave and Hat Guy are walking away from the scene.]
:::Dave:
:::* Are you all of a sudden in the mood for Thai food?
:::* Let's try OpenBSD next time...
:::* If you'd done the other one, maybe the popcorn would have popped.
:::* Let's see if rubbing some bacon on it will work.
:::* Let's try Linux next time...

::::'''13th-14th Panes: OpenBSD Branch''' 
::::[13th panel is of a panned view. Dave and Hat Guy are walking on a path away from a house.]
::::[14th panel is back to a "normal camera view".]
::::Dave:
::::* Okay then.
::::* Let's go exploring!
::::* I love Windows.
::::* Guess not.

::'''4th-7th Panes: Other Partition Branch''' 
::[Hat Guy has ??? next to his head to signify confusion. [[Dave]] walks in. Dave is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. The two stop typing. Dave has ??? next to his head. Dave had stepped back while Hat Guy is checking on Dave's laptop computer. Hat Guy is holding something rectangular.]
::Dave:
::* Maybe if you cross connect the serial port to video port you'll be able to send the video directly in as an input for the password
::* What's a segfault?
::* I think the cameras need to face each other.
::* I'm not sure spaghetti works as a USB cable...

::'''8th Pane: Video Password Branch''' 
::[Hat Guy and Dave are at sea, both emitting ripples. A shark's fin can be seen close to Dave.]
::Dave:
::* It worked fine for the shark
::* We're definitely getting closer though
::* That didn't work!
::* It would have worked for Solaris.
::* Look, it made perfect sense at the time.
::* Still simpler than it used to be, I guess.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Bobcats]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Dinosaurs]]
[[Category:Dreams]]
[[Category:Firefly]]
[[Category:Google Maps]]
[[Category:Linux]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Politics]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]

1350: Lorenz

2014-04-02T22:57:49Z

108.162.219.33: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1350
| date = April 1, 2014
| title = Lorenz
| image = 1350_lorenz_loop.png
| titletext = Every choice, no matter how small, begins a new story
}}

{{incomplete|All possible dialogues are not yet accounted for}}

==Explanation==
This comic is an April fools comic with crowd sourced content. Since April 1st 2014 was a Tuesday, this comic is not in the normal sequence Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

This comic is dynamic and needs interaction by the viewer. Initially there was a bug when using the URL <nowiki>http://www.xkcd.com/</nowiki> or even <nowiki>https://xkcd.com/</nowiki> and only <nowiki>http://xkcd.com/</nowiki> did work. <nowiki>http://xkcd.org/</nowiki> and <nowiki>http://www.xkcd.org/</nowiki>, don't seem to work.

{{w|HTTP cookie|Cookies}} are required to see this page properly.

It appears that new panels may be generated by Randall in near real time as user suggestions to dialog is submitted. The dialogue options are likely based on click-through rates and hence will change over day based on which choices are clicked most using {{w|A/B_testing|A/B measurement techniques..}} This will mean that the most popular choices for dialogue line will prevail as the statistics build up. In some cases, dialogue line options do not depend on the continuity of the storyline followed, suggesting that some parts of the story are planned. For example, do several of the storylines involve one of the two main charachters waking up and for instance telling the other character, “I had the strangest dream…” or even reliving the dream again. This may be due to common submissions across storylines as well.

Every panel has a "permalink" option which generates a unique URL for all the choices made by the reader -- so for example http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:26c8dcea-b9aa-11e3-8002-002590d77bdd will take you to a particular place in the selected choices.

The title 'Lorenz' is referring to {{w|Edward Norton Lorenz}} who among other subjects was famous for {{w|Chaos theory}}. The title is a reference to that the story line of today's comic will include most (all?) of the user submitted dialogue and hence will in nature be chaotic. In addition, the title text, "Every choice, no matter how small", is a reference to the butterfly effect, a phrase coined by Edward Lorenz to describe how a small initial change can lead to wide variations in outcome in a chaotic system.

This comic is an example of a {{w|Choose Your Own Adventure}} story.

Many of the storylines involve Pokemon battles featuring Pikachu, a very popular pokemon. Pikachu uses a number of different moves, none of which are from the Pokemon games. These moves are labelled as "Not very effective".
Variably, Pikachu uses the following moves:
Granite - Pikachu appears atop a granite platform.
Faceless - Pikachu's face disappears.
Thief - Pikachu is wearing hat guy's hat.
Ink - Pikachu is covered in ink.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:[A transcript will be difficult to create due to the branching nature of the comic.]

There are many options. Not everyone will see the same options. We are trying to capture as many options as possible in the transcript below. '''The order and options has changed since the transcripter captured the dialogue'''....The dialogue is likely based on click-through rates and hence will change over time based on which choices are clicked most using {{w|A/B_testing|A/B measurement techniques..}}

Often, when a panel is without any choices to make, there is only the option "Continue" to see the next panel.

'''1st Pane:''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:be7a3304-b685-11e3-8001-94de80a03a29 permalink]) 
Hat Guy:
* Refresh... No new email... Refresh .. No new tweets... Refresh...
* These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game.
* These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game. [There are two completely separate branches with this same text. In one of them, it's written "i'll" in lowercase rather than "I'll".]
* Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on.
* Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays.
* Gravity. Lots of it.

:'''2nd Pane: Refresh Branch''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39 permalink]) 
:Dave:
:* So you're still refusing to use Facebook?
:* Wanna build a snowman?
:* Hey. I hear Godot is in town. Wanna try to meet him?
:* You know. Your car's on fire.

:'''2nd Pane: Stupid Tiles Branch''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:79f036ac-b9a0-11e3-9003-94de80a03a39 permalink]) 
:[Dave visits Hat Guy.]
:Dave:
:* There's something weird out on the lawn.
:* There's a dinosaur at the door.
:* I heard home depot has 1024 bathroom tiles.
:* I think I saw a "4096" tile outside somewhere.

::'''3rd Pane: Something Weird Branch''' 
::Hat Guy:
::* This is an apartment. We don't have a lawn.
::* I have a lawn?
::* I hope it's not a bobcat this time.
::* If you reprogrammed the squirrel laser to target hipsters again...

:::'''4th-5th Panes: Apartment Branch''' 
:::[Hat Guy and Dave leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
:::Dave:
:::* OK, two weird things.
:::* I can see a creeper down there.
:::* Is this 1-1 from Mario?
:::* See? It's like a glitch in the Matrix.
:::* This isn't where I left that...

::::'''6th Pane: Two Weird Things Branch''' 
::::Dave:
::::* I count three.
::::* Why is there a gap here?
::::* Who tiled the moat?

::::'''6th Pane: Creeper Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy: Damn Griefers.

::::'''6th Pane: Mario Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave pass by a tree.]
::::Dave:
::::* Why does that tree looks fake?
::::* Actually, it's the final castle. Grab your Fire Flower!
::::* It's over this way.
::::* I've never been this far before!

:::::'''7th-11th Panes: Fake Tree Branch''' 
:::::Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
:::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Theft"!
:::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
:::::Narrator: ...
:::::Pikachu: Um...

:::::'''7th Pane: Never This Far Branch''' 
:::::Dave: Are you going insane again?

::::'''6th Pane: Matrix Glitch Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* How far can we go?
::::* What the fuck?!
::::* How... How do we get everything back?

:::'''4th-5th Panes: Lawn Question Branch''' 
:::[Hat Guy and Dave leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
:::Dave:
:::* Hmmm, did you order a moat?
:::* I don't remember this being here.
:::* Look how deep it goes!
:::* It looks like I can see Moria from here.

::::'''6th Pane: Order Moat Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* It helps keep bobcats out.
::::* Of course. All cool kids have moats in their yards.
::::* I don't have the best rerlationship with my mailman.
::::* Yep. Delivered in two days, courtesy of Amazon Prime.

::::'''6th Pane: Don't Remember Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* It has begun! That's one of the first holes in reality.
::::* I wanted to jump over the massive sinkhole, but nooo, someone just had to find out what was down there.
::::* Oh, I had the moving company install it last week.
::::* We poop in it.
::::* Finally got you out of the damn house.

:::::'''7th Pane: Hole in Reality Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* I've been working on a theory that 2048 is a tool for the old ones to open up portals to this reality.
:::::* What about black holes? Those don't count?
:::::* We must go deeper.

::::::'''7th-13th Panes: Damn House Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
::::::Narrator: ...
::::::Pikachu: Um...
::::::Pikachu: Well then.
::::::Pikachu: I might have left surprises in that direction.

::::'''6th Pane: Look How Deep Branch''' 
::::Dave:
::::* I wonder if we can get someone to fall in?
::::* I'm going in. You can come if you want to. I think I see stars down there.
::::* That was a missing opportunity.
::::* I should come outside more often.

::::'''6th Pane: Moria Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* You see Moria from everywhere, Dave.
::::* Yeah, who did you think gave them a balrog?
::::* Moria is an anagram of Mario!

:::::'''7th-10th Panes: Moria Everywhere Branch''' 
:::::Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
:::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
:::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
:::::Narrator:
:::::* Google Maps didn't warn me of this.
:::::* Enemy Pikachu used "The Discrete Metric"!
:::::* Gathered the ink!

::::::'''11th-21th Panes: Google Maps Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Uplift!"
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Cute Face!"
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Faceless"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Where's Twitch when I need help?
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Abandonment"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...

::::::'''11th-15th Panes: Discrete Metric Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Extrude"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: ...
::::::Pikachu: Um...
::::::Pikachu:
::::::* Now I only have Struggle left. Tie?
::::::* We are the knights who say Ni!
::::::* What is even going on here?

:::::::'''16th Pane: Struggle Branch''' 
:::::::Pikachu: No fair!

::::::'''11th-13th Panes: Gathered Ink Branch''' 
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...
::::::Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Granite"!
::::::Narrator: It's not very effective...

:::::'''7th-10th Panes: Balrog Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* One does not simple "give" a balrog.
:::::* What? You weren't using it!
:::::* Gift-wrapping's the hardest part.

:::::'''7th Pane: Anagram Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy and Dave pass by a tree.]
:::::Dave: Not idly do the leaves of Lorien fall.

:::'''4th-12th Panes: Bobcat Branch''' 
:::[A giant hole appears and they fall into it.]
:::Hat Guy and Dave: Aaaaa...
:::[Hat Guy wakes up.]
:::Hat Guy: Gasp [Goes to his desk.]
:::Hat Guy: Yawn [Sits at his desk.]
:::Hat Guy:
:::* Might as well clear more tiles.
:::* Definitely not going outside today.
:::* Thank God it wasn't a bobcat.
:::* Hmmm... I should buy a shovel.

::::'''13th Pane: Clear More Tiles Branch''' 
::::[Dave visits Hat Guy again.]
::::Dave:
::::* Um, there's a hole in your lawn...
::::* There's someone at the door looking for you.
::::* I made an apple pie.
::::* If you want to do that, I'm rebuilding my bathroom this afternoon.

:::::'''14th Pane: Hole in the Lawn Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* If it doesn't lead to a 1024 tile, I'm leaving.
:::::* Damn bobcats.
:::::* I just had a dream about that.

::::::'''15th-16th Panes: Damn Bobcats Branch''' 
::::::Dave:
::::::* Well it was here...
::::::* I don't think it was bobcats this time. Unless they have backshoes...

::::::'''15th-22th Panes: Dream Branch''' 
::::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside again and fall in the hole again~.]
::::::Hat Guy and Dave: Aaaaa...
::::::[Hat Guy wakes up, leaves the bed and finds a boomerang.]
::::::Hat Guy:
::::::* It looks like is [sic] fell from space.
::::::* I hope this isn't just another one of those dreams that keeps coming back at you.
::::::* I hope this was not thrown by a bobcat.

:::::::'''23th-26th Panes: Space Branch''' 
:::::::[Hat Guy throwns the boomerang away and it hits something.]
:::::::Crash!
:::::::[Hat Guy runs away.]

:::::::'''23th-34th Panes: Coming Back Branch''' 
:::::::[Hat Guy throws the boomerang twice, only for it to return to him both times.]
:::::::Hat Guy: Hm. I was expecting a shark.
:::::::[Hat Guy throwns the boomerang again, and it returns to him again.]

:::::::'''23th-30th Panes: Thrown by Bobcat Branch''' 
:::::::[Hat Guy throws the boomerang, only for it to return to him .]
:::::::Hat Guy: There's a mesage written on it.
:::::::[Hat Guy throws the boomerang again. It hits something.]
:::::::Crash!
:::::::[Hat Guy runs away.]

::::'''13th Pane: Thank God Branch''' 
::::Dave:
::::* You just got a package. It's by the door.
::::* Why is there a bobcat on your lawn?
::::* There's somewhere [sic] weird out on the lawn.
::::* Hey do you know why there's a giant hole in the yard?

::::'''14th Pane: Something Weird Branch''' 
::::Hat Guy:
::::* This seems familiar.
::::* Hold up. I need to get my wingsuit first.
::::* I hope it's not a giant hole.
::::* I have a bad feeling about this.

::::'''15th-18th Pane: Familiar Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside.]
::::Hat Guy: I hope it's not a velociraptor.

::::'''15th-18th Pane: Hope Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside. They pass by a tree.]
::::Dave: How disappointed are you?
::::Hat Guy:
::::* I was expecting a bobcat.
::::* Oh? That's the other tree.
::::* Eh, not that much.

::::'''14th-16th Panes: Do You Know Why Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside.]
::::Hat Guy: I swear if it's a bobcat.
::::Hat Guy:
::::* Why did you bring me here?
::::* This dream has been looping for years, and yet we never tire of it. Why is that?

:::::'''17th Pane: Dream Loop Branch''' 
:::::[There is a gap in the ground. Hat Guy jumps over it, Dave looks into it.]

::::'''13th-14th Panes: Buy Shovel Branch''' 
::::[Hat Guy looks at his screen wondering.]
::::Hat Guy:
::::* Wow! Shovels sure are expensive!
::::* Shovels can't be actually made out of two sticks and a row of rocks?
::::* How can there be 36 types of shovel??!
::::* These prices are insane! I wonder if you can rent a shovel...

:::::'''15th-18th Panes: Sticks and Rocks Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy is wondering more. Dave comes. They connect their laptops. Dave is wondering. Hat Guy tries something at Dave's laptop.]

:::'''4th-5th Panes: Squirrel Laser Branch''' 
:::[Hat Guy and Dave go outside.]
:::Hat Guy:
:::* Let's just say we won't have to worry about parking.
:::* No, now they're just wearing wigs ironically.
:::* Things may have gotten out of control a little.
:::* At least it improved their haircuts.

::'''3rd Pane: Bathroom Tiles Branch''' 
::Hat Guy:
::* But how many bathrooms?
::* That's 2^5 more than Ikea, I need to see for myself.
::* Let's go, I can keep playing on my phone on the drive.
::* Pfft. Amateurs. Let's go mock them.

::'''3rd Pane: Dinosaur Branch''' 
::T-Rex:
::* Self-doubt crippled my arms. Can I have yours?
::* I need a hand!
::* Did you think he was joking?
::* Sorry for just barging in, I couldn't reach the doorbell.

:::'''4th Pane: Crippled Arms Branch''' 
:::T-Rex:
:::* Never answer your mobile phone while I am addressing you!
:::* Also, have you heard about Tumblr?
:::* Also I have some trenchant observations on language and philosophy to make.
:::* It's not like you're using them.

::::'''5th Pane: Mobile Phone Branch''' 
::::[T-Rex is going to step on a house.]
::::T-Rex:
::::* I think you just entered a dead zone.
::::* Kids these days.
::::* Die you monster.

:::::'''6th Pane: Dead Zone Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, goes outside and finds a boomerang.]

:::::'''6th Pane: Kids These Days Branch''' 
:::::[Hat Guy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, and goes back to his computer.]

:::::'''6th Pane: Die You Monster Branch''' 
:::::[Dave is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, and starts singing.]
:::::Dave: [Singing] ''I woke up like this.''

::::'''5th-11th Panes: Language and Philosophy Branch''' 
::::[T-Rex is going to step on a house.]
::::* T-Rex: Also, your brain is like this house.
:::: [Hat Guy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream and goes back to his computer.]

:'''2nd Pane: Stupid Tiles Branch''' ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:ffdd8916-b9a7-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd]) 
:[Dave visits Hat Guy.]
:Dave:
:* What's with those tiny games you keep playing, anyway?
:* Isn't that sort of meaningless?
:* Up for a dangerous experiment with no pay?
:* You won't believe what just fell off of your roof.

:'''2nd-3rd Panes: Political Thing Branch''' 
:Laptop: "...and let's go live to the debate."
:[Two politicians are debating on TV.]
:Politician 1:
:* In contrast to my oppponent, who I quote, "Never liked Firefly much to begin with."
:* ...but even if you tied enough birds to the car, would you get them to take off in unison?
:* And if elected, I vow to win this war on Christmas once and for all!
:* I agree with my opponent all all [sic] issues and I think his economic plan is fantastic!

::'''4th Pane: Tied Birds Branch''' 
::Politician 2:
::* Tie a predatory bird to the car with a somewhat shorter rope so that it will scare off the rest of the birds without being able to reach them.
::* Training. That's why I support the "Airlift Act", which would put more resources into the hands of bird educators everywhere.
::* By opening and closing an umbrella near them.
::* One word: Fiscal hawks.

:::'''5th Pane: Airlift Act Branch''' 
:::Politician 1:
:::* But is "Airlift" an acronym?
:::* But you must agree that a bitd in the hand is worth more than three educators in the bush.
:::* Incredible!
:::* Wait... Is that like people who educate birds, or birds that teach?

::::'''6th Pane: Airlift an Acronym''' 
::::Dave:
::::* There are birds outside tied to a car.
::::* The owls in our barn are forming a union.
::::* Or course: Avian Implemented Reuseable Lifter and Ingenuous Flight Technology!

:::::'''7th Pane: Car Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* Cool, let's see who we should vote for.
:::::* I know who I'm voting for.
:::::* How many birds?

:::::'''8th-9th Panes: How Many Branch''' 
:::::Dave:
:::::* I call her "Serenity."
:::::* So when you said birds...

:::::'''10th-13th Panes: You Said Birds Branch''' 
:::::Hat Guy:
:::::* Wait. The birds are inside!?
:::::* I needed to escape from politics anyway.

:::::'''14th-19th Panes: Birds Inside Branch''' 
:::::White Hat: Want to forget your dreams? There's a pill for that!

:'''2nd-3rd Panes: BSD Branch''' 
:[Hat Guy is confused, staring at his laptop.]
:Hat Guy: ??
:Hat Guy:
:* Now I just need to look up what a "beard error" is...
:* Wait. What's on this other partition?
:* Why is Python importing Skynet?
:* My keyboard has to support SSH over USB?

::'''4th-7th Panes: Beard Error Branch''' 
::[Hat Guy has ?? next to his head to signify confusion. [[Dave]] walks in. (continue) Dave is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. The two stop typing. Dave has ??? next to his head. Dave had stepped back while the character is checking on Dave's laptop computer. The character is holding something rectangular.]
::Dave:
::* The USB cable appears to be mono-directional.
::* Kernel mites?
::* I'm not sure rubbing butter on it will help
::* Yep. It's haunted.

:::'''8th-12th Panes: Rubbing Butter Branch''' 
:::[Dave and Hat Guy are handling their computers more aggressively.]
:::Hat Guy: ARGH!
:::[They both stop. Hat Guy walks away, his chair turned 180 degrees. Pushing aside the chair, the character returns with a fiery blowtorch while wearing goggles.]
:::Dave: [holding up a finger] Um.
:::[Hat Guy's computer was so burned, not only steam is coming out of the computer, but even the desk is noticeably burnt. The cable (apparently also burned) hangs from Dave's laptop computer. The used blowtorch is clumsily laid sideways be the side of the desk. Both Hat Guy (whose goggles are pushed off his eye) and Dave are looking at the calamity. The chair is almost out of view. The goggles are on the floor while the chair is nowhere to be seen. Dave and Hat Guy are walking away from the scene.]
:::Dave:
:::* Are you all of a sudden in the mood for Thai food?
:::* Let's try OpenBSD next time...
:::* If you'd done the other one, maybe the popcorn would have popped.
:::* Let's see if rubbing some bacon on it will work.
:::* Let's try Linux next time...

::::'''13th-14th Panes: OpenBSD Branch''' 
::::[13th panel is of a panned view. Dave and Hat Guy are walking on a path away from a house.]
::::[14th panel is back to a "normal camera view".]
::::Dave:
::::* Okay then.
::::* Let's go exploring!
::::* I love Windows.
::::* Guess not.

::'''4th-7th Panes: Other Partition Branch''' 
::[Hat Guy has ??? next to his head to signify confusion. [[Dave]] walks in. Dave is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. The two stop typing. Dave has ??? next to his head. Dave had stepped back while Hat Guy is checking on Dave's laptop computer. Hat Guy is holding something rectangular.]
::Dave:
::* Maybe if you cross connect the serial port to video port you'll be able to send the video directly in as an input for the password
::* What's a segfault?
::* I think the cameras need to face each other.
::* I'm not sure spaghetti works as a USB cable...

::'''8th Pane: Video Password Branch''' 
::[Hat Guy and Dave are at sea, both emitting ripples. A shark's fin can be seen close to Dave.]
::Dave:
::* It worked fine for the shark
::* We're definitely getting closer though
::* That didn't work!
::* It would have worked for Solaris.
::* Look, it made perfect sense at the time.
::* Still simpler than it used to be, I guess.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Bobcats]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Dinosaurs]]
[[Category:Dreams]]
[[Category:Firefly]]
[[Category:Google Maps]]
[[Category:Linux]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Politics]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]

Talk:1346: Career

2014-03-25T20:14:58Z

108.162.219.33:

Come on ... those tasks can't be random ... someone find out what is Randal referring to ... isn't {{w|Luke Skywalker}} doing something wiht dryer traps at start of fourth movie? -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 11:10, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

:The answer to your question may depend upon which movie you think is the "fourth movie" (4th episode? 4th movie produced? If it's 4th movie produced, do you count the Holiday Special? Also, should anyone, anywhere, for any reason ever count the Holiday Special?) -- [[User:Brettpeirce|Brettpeirce]] ([[User talk:Brettpeirce|talk]]) 12:25, 24 March 2014 (UTC)
:: Im sure he is refering to {{w|The Phantom Menace}}, and the comic could describe Anakin, however im not sure what "lump of slight soft wax" would refer to. [[User:Spongebog|Spongebog]] ([[User talk:Spongebog|talk]]) 14:49, 24 March 2014 (UTC)
:::I believe Hkmaly is referring to Episode IV. However, I think he's reading too much into this, and the tasks really are random. You simply can't connect them in a way that makes sense. [[User:NealCruco|NealCruco]] ([[User talk:NealCruco|talk]]) 16:38, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

I wouldn't say "it's impossible that anyone would pay someone for peeling lint from dryer traps" as someone in the commercial laundry mats has to do it at some point...[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.8|108.162.216.8]]
:Sure, but that's surely not the worker's ''only'' task. No one will pay someone just to peel lint. [[User:NealCruco|NealCruco]] ([[User talk:NealCruco|talk]]) 16:38, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

If you had enough lint to remove you may need to hire more than one person to do it. If I needed lint peeled I would pay a reasonable wage for someone to do it. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.117|108.162.246.117]] 18:46, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

Do you think Randall would draw some cartoon just to mess with the people here at explainxkcd? I know I would! [[User:Bigfatbernie|Bigfatbernie]] ([[User talk:Bigfatbernie|talk]]) 19:01, 24 March 2014 (UTC) ([[User talk:bigfatbernie|talk]])

biting into soft wax could also be stated as 'leaving an impression' {{unsigned ip|108.162.216.44}}

:I can see why peeling lint is fun (at least for 5 minutes) as it's soft and it feels good and you can play around with it and its a rather relaxing task. The light saber stuff obviously is fun, too. But I really don't see why anyone would want to bite into a lump of slightly soft wax. Does anyone do that in real life? Sounds pretty disgusting to me. -- [[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.137|173.245.53.137]] 19:53, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

I don't think it's random at all... work my up from the bottom, to cutting edge science, resulting in amazing breathroughs, then come back to leave a lasting impression[[Special:Contributions/108.162.221.28|108.162.221.28]] 19:54, 25 March 2014 (UTC)

The prior comic was about sleeping. Is this one actually about dreaming? The "dream" job tasks sound like the random events one might encounter in a dream. Pondy

Biting into wax is actually pretty stimulating to the teeth, and is quite entertaining. Try biting that soft wax they put around cheese.
[[Special:Contributions/173.245.55.73|173.245.55.73]] 23:39, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

:I think this should be mentioned in the explanation. "Dream" cam mean ''an aspiration or goal'' or ''something of unreal excellence'' to HR people and to Cueball it means ''a succession of images passing through the mind during sleep''. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.50.84|173.245.50.84]] 22:18, 24 March 2014 (UTC)

Lightsaber handles certainly do exist right now (http://www.ebay.com/itm/Icons-Darth-Vader-lightsaber-James-Earl-Jones-Signature-Edition-265-of-1000-/191106490913?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item2c7ed5a221), and you can put lightsaber handles up to any and all kinds of objects. You can even switch them on, or at least flick a switch ... it's the next part that sadly doesn't exist -- the actual lightsaber. Putting a lightsaber handle up to objects and flicking a switch would get pretty boring pretty fast though since the crucial lightsaber part is missing...[[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.33|108.162.219.33]] 20:14, 25 March 2014 (UTC)larK

1331: Frequency

2014-02-17T14:38:21Z

108.162.219.33: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1331
| date = February 17, 2014
| title = Frequency
| image = frequency.png
| titletext = This comic shows estimated average frequency. I wanted to include the pitch drop experiment, but it turns out the gif format has some issues with decade-long loops.
}}

Today's comic is animated. While we prepare a gif for the wiki, click on the date above the comic to see the animated version.
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Incomplete.}}
This comic shows a number of common events, ordered in a grid. Each of the events flashes with their average frequency.

For example, statistically a child is born somewhere on the world approximately every 0.24 seconds, or four times per second. Therefore the tile "One birth" blinks about 4 times per second.

The table below lists all the events and their duration / frequency. Some events make reference to other comics.

The title text refers to the {{w|Pitch drop experiment}} which measures the flow of a piece of pitch over many years. At room temperature, tar pitch flows at a very slow rate, taking several years to form a single drop. The title text jokes that Randall tried to include a tile that flashes about once every {{w|decade|ten years}}, but the tiles are all {{w|Animated GIF|animated GIFs}} and the file format does not support animations that long.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
!class="unsortable"|Text!!data-sort-type="number"|Period!!class="unsortable"|Frequency!!class="unsortable"|Explanation
|-
|Heartbeat||0.86 second||70 times per minute||
|-
|One birth||0.24 second||250 times per minute||
|-
|One death||0.56 second||107 times per minute||
|-
|Someone edits Wikipedia||0.67 second||90 times per minute||
|-
|Someone buys a vibrator||2.99 seconds||20 times per minute||
|-
|China builds a car||1.89 second||32 times per minute||
|-
|Japan builds a car||4.01 seconds||15 times per minute||
|-
|Germany builds a car||5.8 seconds||10 times per minute||
|-
|The US builds a car||6.95 seconds||8.6 times per minute||
|-
|Someone else builds a car||1.03 second||58 times per minute||
|-
|A European Union resident has their first kiss||5.53 seconds||11 times per minute||
|-
|A US fire department puts out a fire||23 seconds||2.6 times per minute||
|-
|Someone hits a hole-in-one||180 seconds||20 times per hour||
|-
|My turn signal blinks||0.94 second||64 times per minute||See below
|-
|The turn signal of the car in front of me blinks||0.9 second||67 times per minute||This, together with the previous item, forms a reference to [[165: Turn Signals]].
|-
|Earthquake (magnitude 1)||2.43 seconds||25 times per minute||
|-
|Earthquake (magnitude 2)||24.26 seconds||2.5 times per minute||
|-
|Earthquake (magnitude 3)||242.6 seconds||15 times per hour||
|-
|Earthquake (magnitude 4)||2426 seconds||1.5 times per hour||
|-
|A member of the UK parliament flushes a toilet||10.06 seconds||6 times per minute||
|-
|An airline flight takes off||0.93 second||65 times per minute||
|-
|Someone buys To kill a mockingbird||42.05 seconds||1.4 times per minute||"{{w|To Kill a Mockingbird}}" is a famous novel by Harper Lee.
|-
|Someone's pet cat kills a mockingbird||1.82 second||33 times per minute||Whereas the previous item references the well-known book "To Kill a Mockingbird", this one talks about mockingbirds being literally killed (in this case, by cats).
|-
|Someone in Phoenix buys new shoes||1.08 second||56 times per minute||
|-
|Someone in Phoenix puts on a condom||2.05 seconds||29 times per minute||
|-
|Someone locks their keys in their car||2.43 seconds||25 times per minute||
|-
|A Sagittarius named Amelia drinks a soda||7.79 seconds||7.7 times per minute||
|-
|A dog bites someone in the US||7.01 seconds||8.6 times per minute||
|-
|Someone steals a bicycle||24.93 seconds||2.4 times per minute||
|-
|A bald eagle catches a fish||2.69 seconds||22 times per minute||
|-
|50,000 plastic bottles are produced||1.27 second||47 times per minute||
|-
|50,000 plastic bottles are recycled||4.64 seconds||13 times per minute||
|-
|A bright meteor is visible somewhere||1.15 second||52 times per minute||
|-
|Old Faithful erupts||5640 seconds||15 times per day||{{w|Old Faithful}} is a geyser in {{w|Yellowstone National Park}} in the US.
|-
|A fishing boat catches a shark||0.83 second||72 times per minute||
|-
|Someone in the US is diagnosed with cancer||18.99 seconds||3.2 times per minute||
|-
|Someone in the US dies from cancer||54.34 seconds||1.1 times per minute||
|-
|Someone adopts a dog from a shelter||15.6 seconds||3.8 times per minute||
|-
|Someone adopts a cat from a shelter||21.3 seconds||2.8 times per minute||
|-
|Someone gets married||0.75 second||80 times per minute||
|-
|Someone registers a domain||0.64 second||94 times per minute||
|-
|Someone in the US buys a house||6.22 seconds||9.6 times per minute||
|-
|Someone in the US gets a tattoo||2.06 seconds||29 times per minute||
|-
|The star PSR J1748-2446AD rotates 1,000 times||1.4 second||43 times per minute||{{w|PSR_J1748-2446ad}} is the fastest spinning {{w|pulsar}} known.
|-
|Someone lies about their age to sign up for Facebook||4.32 seconds||14 times per minute||
|-
|Someone breaks an iPhone screen||0.93 second||65 times per minute||
|-
|A Little League player strikes out||1.23 second||49 times per minute||
|-
|Someone has sex in North Dakota||1.38 second||43 times per minute||
|-
|Justin Bieber gains a follower on Twitter||4.73 seconds||13 times per minute||
|-
|Someone in Denver orders pizza||1.27 second||47 times per minute||
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
Events are written in grey and arranged in a grid. Each statement pulses black at a given interval.

{|
|Heartbeat
|One birth
|One death
|Someone edits Wikipedia
|Someone buys a vibrator
|-
|China builds a car
|Japan builds a car
|Germany builds a car
|The US builds a car
|Someone else builds a car
|-
|A european union resident has their first kiss
|A US fire department puts out a fire
|Someone hits a hole-in-one
|My turn signal blinks
|The turn signal of the car in front of me blinks
|-
|Earthquake (magnitude 1)
|Earthquake (magnitude 2)
|Earthquake (magnitude 3)
|Earthquake (magnitude 4)
|Member of the UK parliament flushes a toilet
|-
|An airline flight takes off
|Someone buys ''To Kill a Mockingbird''
|Someone's pet cat kills a mockingbird
|Someone in Phoenix buys new shoes
|Someone in Phoenix puts on a condom
|-
|Someone locks their keys in their car
|A Sagittarius named Amelia drinks a soda
|A dog bites someone in the US
|Someone steals a bicycle
|A bald eagle catches a fish
|-
|50,000 plastic bottles are produced
|50,000 plastic bottles are recycled
|A bright meteor is visible somewhere
|Old Faithful erupts
|A fishing boat catches a shark
|-
|Someone in the US is diagnosed with cancer
|Someone in the US dies from cancer
|Someone adopts a dog from a shelter
|Someone adopts a cat from a shelter
|Someone gets married
|-
|Someone registers a domain
|Someone in the US buys a house
|Someone in the US gets a tattoo
|The star ''PSR J1748-2446ad'' rotates 1,000 times
|Someone lies about their age to sign up for Facebook
|-
|Someone breaks an iPhone screen
|A little league player strikes out
|Someone has sex in North Dakota
|Justin Bieber gains a follower on Twitter
|Someone in Denver orders a pizza
|}

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Charts]]

Talk:1318: Actually

2014-02-04T19:55:41Z

108.162.219.33:

I started reading the comic from the topmost line "Actually, measurements suggest it's flat." It seemed that he was talking about the planet, but it's also a response to the curved-space line from before. Upon further reading, I can't tell if the discussion is about a planet or a universe, and it looks like you can go around the circle twice and assume both. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.50.72|173.245.50.72]] 05:13, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

: It is about the shape of the Earth. The Earth exists in a curved universe. The alt text is referring to the fact that by being more and more specific you can always get the last word in but it may alienate you from your peers. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.117|108.162.246.117]] 05:14, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

: "Actually, measurements suggest it's flat." could mean two different things: the first would be in the physical sense, the second in the economic sense, if he is referring to the book "The World is Flat" from 2005. {{unsigned|Tc18021188}}

The transcript needs some way to show that Cueball is talking to the second Hairy in the end. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.71|108.162.216.71]] 08:25, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

: "show that Cueball is talking to the second Hairy in the end" -> Do you consider it done ? [[User:MGitsfullofsheep|MGitsfullofsheep]] ([[User talk:MGitsfullofsheep|talk]]) 08:50, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

Fixed factual error about sum of angles of a triangle in a closed geometry. An example of closed geometry is spherical geometry, where sum of angles of a triangle is π < A + B + C<3π http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spherical_trigonometry . Previous text wrongly stated that A+B+C would be smaller than π in closed geometry and greater in open geometry. [[User:MGitsfullofsheep|MGitsfullofsheep]] ([[User talk:MGitsfullofsheep|talk]]) 08:50, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

About the oblate configuration: why attribute it to centripetal force? Because centrifugal force is an "apparent" force? Well centripetal force from gravitational pull is actually balancing the centrifugal force caused by rotation of the earth. The whole "centrifugal force does not exist" thing is a misconception. It's an inertial force and writing the equilibrium equations for an object in the rotating reference frame (the one we experience everyday) at latitude phi you see: gravitational pull toward the center of the planet + centrifugal force away from the axis of rotation= mass*g(phi). This g(phi) is not the same in every spot of the earth, it changes in value and direction (does not always point exactly to the center of the earth) with latitude.{{unsigned ip|108.162.229.65}}
: I second this. The centripetal force would actually be the gravity of earth. Attributing the oblate shape of earth to this is just plain wrong, since it pulls inwards, not outwards. Actually all forces could be called "apparent" forces, since they're really just constructs to help you calculate the acceleration of a body. There's always a (local) reference frame where a particular force doesn't "exist". {{unsigned ip|173.245.53.131}}
:: Sure, there is always such frame, but gravitation is real force anyway because we can measure the higgs field by detecting higgs bosons. At least I think we can. Failing that, electromagnetic forces are real because we can measure electromagnetic field by detecting photons, this I'm sure of :-). -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:23, 17 January 2014 (UTC)
:::Come now. Do you really expect me to do coordinate substitution in my head while strapped to a centrifuge? [[User:Diszy|Diszy]] ([[User talk:Diszy|talk]]) 15:44, 17 January 2014 (UTC)
::::No, Mister Diszy, I expect you to die. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.238.117|108.162.238.117]] 20:14, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

I don't see why the explanation assumes the top claim is at the start and end. I think that part of the explanation is a stretch and that the "flat" claim is not meant to be given twice. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.117|108.162.246.117]] 17:38, 17 January 2014 (UTC)
:It's a loop. Technically there is no "start". Each line is a direct "more specific" response to the previous remark. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.238.117|108.162.238.117]] 20:17, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

I always suspected Freddie Mercury was a closet planetoligist. {{unsigned ip|127.0.0.1|20:26, 17 January 2014 (UTC)}}

I highly doubt this pun is intentional, but this could be seen as a case of circular logic. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.238.117|108.162.238.117]] 20:35, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

Any significance to where they are standing along the circle? If we start with flat, the first three are right in a row, but then the rest are spread out further.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.57|108.162.216.57]] 21:20, 17 January 2014 (UTC)
:Yes. They are standing close to the center of where their sentence is. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.238.117|108.162.238.117]] 03:17, 18 January 2014 (UTC)

Quick suggestion. Under the (first) "[Actually,] measurements suggest it's flat." explanation title, just have the first point given. Then continue through the other "Actually"'s and ''then'' have (under a second "Actually, measurements suggest it's flat." header) the "Finally, the first speaker comments again," point and then the "The arguments could continue around the circle," one at the end. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.223|141.101.99.223]] 22:41, 17 January 2014 (UTC)

It was not the case that the middle age believd in a flat eart (some of the antic cultures did). See [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myth_of_the_Flat_Earth Wikipedia]. --[[User:DaB.|DaB.]] ([[User talk:DaB.|talk]]) 00:27, 18 January 2014 (UTC)

;not a recursive loop

"Further statements could now continue to be interpreted as referring to the universe rather than the Earth, thus forming a recursive loop.". This phrase is awful. As far as I understood this long hypothetical sentence does not even wrap 2 times. Adding 'recursive' is totally pointless here. Am I right? {{unsigned ip|141.101.98.222}}
:I agree. It is not a closed loop. You can only move two more steps after Cueball says "the ''universe'' is flat". When Megan starts to talk about the EGM, then it could no longer be mistaken as being a comment on the shape of the universe! And even if it could, then the last comment before Cueball also does not make sense if they were already discussing the universe! So I would say the explanation is incomplete as long as the recursive loop part is here [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 14:04, 22 January 2014 (UTC)

''Actually,'' you can win every exchange just by being one level more precise than '''whom'''ever talked last. --[[User:Jesse|Jesse]] ([[User talk:Jesse|talk]]) 05:44, 19 January 2014 (UTC)
: ''Actually,'' "... than '''who'''ever talked last." is correct, which puts you on the receiving end of https://xkcd.com/326/.
:Here, ''than'' is a conjunction, i.e. it joins two sentences where the second is [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/than the basis of comparison]. Each sentence has its own subject and verb+tense. The first has ''You'' and ''can win''. The second has ''whoever'' and ''talked''. '''Who/whoever''' are the subject forms, and '''whom/whomever''' are the object forms.

:To use another example, would you say ''I am smarter than '''him''' is'', rather than the correct ''I am smarter than '''he''' is''?

:Seriously, please stop being an AGN and leave teaching to those '''who''' know. Now excuse me as [https://xkcd.com/386/ I don't feel well....] However, I did have to fix this for all the ESL speakers who have enough problems without language ''incorrections''. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.208.252|108.162.208.252]] 16:07, 22 January 2014 (UTC)

::Bravo! Very well done! [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.33|108.162.219.33]] 19:55, 4 February 2014 (UTC)larK

As a Mathematician, I would just abstract the conversation using Category Theory and try to find an algorithm to be able to abstract any additional precision. Then I would hope that no one found that algorithm first. I still don't know what to call that algorithm though. This is the algorithm now. 16:33, 21 January 2014 (UTC)

Talk:1288: Substitutions

2013-11-11T22:04:35Z

108.162.219.33:

We need a web plugin that does this automatically, stat! [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.216|141.101.99.216]] 11:36, 8 November 2013 (UTC)
::Lol, I was just thinking the same thing! I was only meaning to post that in the discussion but saw that nobody had done the explanation yet. There goes a good chunk of my day :/ [[User:Zyxuvius|Zyxuvius]] ([[User talk:Zyxuvius|talk]]) 11:55, 8 November 2013 (UTC)
:::: Came here just to say this. Please post links to the unofficial xkcd news substitution tool as soon as it becomes available :P -- [[Special:Contributions/173.245.51.223|173.245.51.223]] 13:41, 8 November 2013 (UTC)

::::It already exists for Firefox: https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/foxreplace/ This addon allows you to create substitution lists that will automatically be applied to web pages. -- [[Special:Contributions/173.245.51.210|173.245.51.210]] 13:39, 8 November 2013 (UTC)
:::: And here's an URL for the abovementioned FoxReplace addon. Just import it, and it will do the substitutions listed in this XKCD comic: https://www.dropbox.com/s/36eq2xgnmv8obpe/XKCD.json {{unsigned ip|173.245.51.210}}

::I threw this together this morning for Chrome: https://github.com/ChrisMagellan/Make-News-Funny/ Note that you need to enable developer mode in your Extensions settings. {{unsigned ip|108.162.219.29}}
:::: Oh God! Thank you! I'm trying not to laugh too loudly at work. This is hilarious [http://www.nytimes.com/2013/11/01/us/politics/book-details-consideration-of-replacing-biden-on-2012-ticket.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0|"While last year’s grind of an eating contest lacked the drama of the 2008 race ..."] -- [[Special:Contributions/173.245.51.223|173.245.51.223]] 15:01, 8 November 2013 (UTC)
::::How do I install it? [[User:Whitecat|Whitecat]] ([[User talk:Whitecat|talk]])

::As a userscript that should work with Scriptish, Greasemonkey or anything else that supports userscripts: https://gist.github.com/mcef/7376276 (click to install: https://gist.github.com/mcef/7376276/raw/e0b7a3ca2a65b8809a48241a92f265ae479c9e99/1288.user.js)
::Add other news sites on the top or just tell me and I'll add them. [[User:Mcef|mcef]] ([[User talk:Mcef|talk]]) 19:57, 8 November 2013 (UTC)

::For those who don't want to install anything in their browsers, here is a bookmarklet. To use it, create a new bookmark and insert the following code as location
javascript:(function(){var%20map={these dudes I know:"These%20dudes%20I%20know","kinda probably":"Kinda%20probably","new%20study":"Tumbl%20post",avenge:"Avenge",SPAAACE:"Spaaace","google%20glass":"Virtual%20Boy",Pokédex:"Pokedex",atomic:"Atomic",Elf-Lord:"Elf-lord",cat:"Cat",eating contest:"Eating%20contest","congressional%20leaders":"River%20spirits","homeland%20security":"Homestart%20Runner","could%20not%20be%20reached%20for%20comment":"Is%20guilty%20and%20everyone%20knows%20it"};var%20b=document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0];b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/new%20study|google%20glass|congressional%20leaders|homeland%20security|could%20not%20be%20reached%20for%20comment|\w+/gi,function($0){return map[$0.toLowerCase()]||$0});})() 
::--[[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.128|173.245.53.128]] 20:44, 8 November 2013 (UTC)
:::: You've made the wrong script. This is the correct one:

<pre>
javascript:
(function(){
var map={
these dudes I know:"These dudes I know",
kinda probably:"Kinda probably",
"Tumblr post":"Tumbl post",
avenge:"Avenge",
SPAAACE:"Spaaace",
"Virtual Boy":"Virtual Boy",
Pokédex:"Pokedex",
atomic:"Atomic",
Elf-Lord:"Elf-lord",
cat:"Cat",
eating contest:"Eating contest",
"river spirits":"River spirits",
"Homestar Runner":"Homestart Runner",
"is guilty and everyone knows it":"Is guilty and everyone knows it"};
var b=document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0];
b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(
/Tumblr post
|Virtual Boy
|river spirits
|Homestar Runner
|is guilty and everyone knows it
|\w+/gi,function($0){
return map[$0.toLowerCase()]||$0});})()
</pre>
[[Special:Contributions/173.245.51.221|173.245.51.221]] 08:45, 9 November 2013 (UTC)

Is "Homestar runner" a reference to something I'm not cool enough to get? [[User:Djbrasier|Djbrasier]] ([[User talk:Djbrasier|talk]]) 20:49, 8 November 2013 (UTC)

::http://www.homestarrunner.com/{{unsigned ip|108.162.219.6}}

I created a plugin for Chrome and Opera, available here: http://www.joshmedeiros.net/XKCD%20Substitutions/ [[Special:Contributions/108.162.242.120|108.162.242.120]] 09:16, 9 November 2013 (UTC)

The Virtual Boy is a oversized *portable* console. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.88|173.245.54.88]] 13:34, 10 November 2013 (UTC)

Pigs In Spaaaaace!