explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

Talk:1682: Bun

2016-05-18T17:28:16Z

108.162.219.77:

The transcript is almost done, but the setting/image of each frame has to be added, and someone may want to fix my possible typos. This is my first contribute to explain xkcd! [[Special:Contributions/108.162.250.158|108.162.250.158]] 10:51, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

:I added the explanations about the images. Thanks for contributing! [[User:Ladidootdoot|Ladidootdoot]] ([[User talk:Ladidootdoot|talk]]) 11:21, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

I assumed this was about hair buns, am I incorrect? [[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.25|173.245.54.25]] 11:10, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

:I also believed that 'bun' was also referring to hair buns/ponytails, thus giving a visual pun to the comic. It would also add another level of the 'heirarchy' pun as well. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.25|173.245.56.25]] 14:08, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

I think it's "bun" short for "bunny", an informal term meaning a rabbit (especially a cute one such as the ones shown in the comic). [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.130|141.101.98.130]] 11:16, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

Of course, 'buns' are also a euphemism for butt, which might clarify a thing or two, or at least add a more amusing context.

I also believe the comic makes more sense when taking that meaning (bun for buttocks/derrière...) into account. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.150.230|162.158.150.230]] 12:53, 18 May 2016 (UTC)J

I know that this is absolutely just a personal gripe, but the website is called explain xkcd, not spell-out-everything-that-happens-in-xkcd.

In relevance, this seems to be satire of current-gen's obsession with (mis)spelling things that are cute incorrectly (see: smol, birb, doge) and the situation in the comic is a role-reversal, with the teacher being a (teen/tween/memer etc.) and the students are accusing the class's professionalism.

The point about 'rank' could of course be some fictional idea that a younger person could attach to a physical entity to make the world mor fun and interesting or something idk.
I would add this theory, of course, but i have no idea what i'm even reading when i read this explanation and don't know where to add it. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.250.161|108.162.250.161]] 12:00, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

:I absolutely agree I have slowly been editing different explanations to try to try to reflect this, but it is a very difficult and tedious process, if you can contribute do it. [[User:Lackadaisical|Lackadaisical]] ([[User talk:Lackadaisical|talk]]) 13:14, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

Hierarchy is misspelled. Unless it's a convoluted pun on heir - hare (almost homophones) ? [[User:blagae|blagae]]
:A new version of the comic has been uploaded by now, with the misspelling corrected. So the heir-hare pun was probably unintentional. ([[User:blagae|blagae]]) 14:58, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

As soon as I read it, I was thinking 'bun' as in 'bottocks', yet there is no mention of that in the explanation?
:Added that in the explanation, but I'm not sure at all that this was intentional. When there is images of bunnies it is not necessarily something that would come into mind. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 14:13, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

Most of the explanations posted thus far seem off-the-mark to me. Especially the ones involving butts, I mean, c'mon... The comment above about "role-reversal" gets close to the heart of the joke (if any), though I think more than anything this strip is just Randall indulging his love for depicting people in roles of presumed authority spouting absurdities. (And for tiny bunnies, of course.) TBH, though, this one mainly gives the impression of being based on a private joke or conversation, or just referencing some meme I haven't seen yet. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.68.35|162.158.68.35]] 16:14, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

: I think it's an obscure reference. Buzzfeed has [https://www.buzzfeed.com/mattbellassai/the-most-important-bunny-gifs-on-the-internet The 33 Most Important Bunny GIFs On The Internet], which ''might'' be related to the "important bun" from [[1663]]. Maybe Ponytail teaches [https://twitter.com/hashtag/anatomyofthebun internet sociology], not biology, and she hasn't clarified that very well. [[User:.42|.42]] ([[User talk:.42|talk]]) 16:27, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

I would say the entire "buttocks" link that is currently reflected in the description is a very poor fit. Clearly "this time of year" is referring to spring, when rabbits are most commonly seen darting around, and when rabbit kittens are most likely to be born/leave their nests. "The image of a king" clearly has nothing to do with Ponytail, as there is an image of a "king bun" on the screen. This is most definitely a reference to the treatment of images of monarchy. For example, in the UK it is illegal to deface images of the Queen. [[User:Fendletruck|Fendletruck]] ([[User talk:Fendletruck|talk]]) 16:49, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

Wondering if there's any tie in to the ancient but not quite defunct alt.devilbunnies, which was about evils buns, their cuteness, and people under their evil sway. The teacher in this case would clearly qualify as a "symp" (bunny sympathizer). [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.77|108.162.219.77]] 17:28, 18 May 2016 (UTC)

1663: Garden/Images

2016-04-04T17:55:51Z

108.162.219.77: /* Images of items */

*Here images for the interactive comic [[1663: Garden]] can be posted.
*Try to keep the naming scheme so to always include the following:
**''1663 garden description.png''

==Images==
===Screen shots===
[[File:1663 garden Megan Monolith Animals and more.png]] 
[[File:1663 garden Fast growing tree - leafless.png]] 
[[File:1663 garden Fast growing tree - lots of leaves.png]] 

===Saved image from xkcd===
[[File:1663 garden Deer and tall gate.png]] 

===Images of items===
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/background.png Background]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/balloon-segment.png Balloon segment]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/beehive-base.png Beehive-base]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/beehive-entrance-a.png Beehive entrance a]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/bird-riser.png Bird riser]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/bird-standing.png Bird standing]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/birdbath.png Birdbath]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-1.png Branch 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-10.png Branch 10]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-11.png Branch 11]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-12.png Branch 12]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-13.png Branch 13]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-14.png Branch 14]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-15.png Branch 15]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-16.png Branch 16]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-17.png Branch 17]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-18.png Branch 18]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-19.png Branch 19]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-20.png Branch 20]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-21.png Branch 21]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-22.png Branch 22]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-23.png Branch 23]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-24.png Branch 24]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-4.png Branch 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-5.png Branch 5]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-6.png Branch 6]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-7.png Branch 7]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-8.png Branch 8]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/branch-9.png Branch 9]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/cactus-1.png Cactus 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/cactus-2.png Cactus 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/cat-balanced.png Cat Balanced]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/cat-ground.png Cat Ground]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/deer-1.png Deer 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/deer-2.png Deer 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/desk-1.png Desk 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/duck-1.png Duck 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/fig-1.png Fig 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/flower-base.png Flower base]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/flower-segment1.png Flower segment 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/flower-segment2.png Flower segment 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/flower-segment3.png Flower segment 3]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/flower-segment4.png Flower segment 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-1.png Grass 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-2.png Grass 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-3.png Grass 3]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-4.png Grass 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-5.png Grass 5]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-6.png Grass 6]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-7.png Grass 7]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-8.png Grass 8]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/grass-9.png Grass 9]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/handfig-1.png Handfig 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/handfig-2.png Handfig 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/important-bun.png Important bun]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/lamppost-1.png Lamppost 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-1.png Leaves 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-10.png Leaves 10]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-11.png Leaves 11]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-12.png Leaves 12]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-13.png Leaves 13]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-14.png Leaves 14]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-15.png Leaves 15]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-16.png Leaves 16]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-17.png Leaves 17]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-18.png Leaves 18]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-19.png Leaves 19]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-2.png Leaves 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-20.png Leaves 20]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-21.png Leaves 21]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-22.png Leaves 22]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-23.png Leaves 23]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-24.png Leaves 24]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-25.png Leaves 25]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-26.png Leaves 26]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-27.png Leaves 27]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-28.png Leaves 28]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-29.png Leaves 29]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-3.png Leaves 3]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-30.png Leaves 30]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-4.png Leaves 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-5.png Leaves 5]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-6.png Leaves 6]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-7.png Leaves 7]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-8.png Leaves 8]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/leaves-9.png Leaves 9]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/man-1a.png Man 1a]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/man-2a.png Man 2a]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/null.png Null]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/obelisk.png Obelisk]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/octopus.png Octopus]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/octopus-hat-capable.png Octopus hat capable]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/right-platform.png Right platform]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/rover.png Rover]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-1.png Shrub 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-2.png Shrub 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-3.png Shrub 3]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-4.png Shrub 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-5.png Shrub 5]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-6.png Shrub 6]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-7.png Shrub 7]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-8.png Shrub 8]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-9.png Shrub 9]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-10.png Shrub 10]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/shrub-11.png Shrub 11]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/snake-1.png Snake 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/snake-2.png Snake 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/tall-platform.png Tall platform]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/talltrunk-1.png Tall trunk 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/talltrunk-2.png Tall trunk 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-1.png Trunk 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-2.png Trunk 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-3.png Trunk 3]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-4.png Trunk 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-5.png Trunk 5]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-6.png Trunk 6]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-7.png Trunk 7]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/trunk-8.png Trunk 8]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/turtle-1.png Turtle 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/turtle-2.png Turtle 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/waterbird-1.png Water bird 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/waterbird-2.png Water bird 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/wavyplant-1.png Wavy plant 1]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/wavyplant-2.png Wavy plant 2]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/wavyplant-3.png Wavy plant 3]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/wavyplant-4.png Wavy plant 4]
*[http://xkcd.com/1663/art/woman-1a.png Woman 1a]

Talk:752: Phobia

2015-07-12T19:02:11Z

108.162.219.77:

"This comic may have references to the movies: Snakes on a plane, Twister, and Thelma & Louise."... and Sharknado.{{unsigned|‎201.76.25.153}}

[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2724064/ Sharknado] wasn't around at the time of this comic, so I removed it from the explanation. Although Randall seemed to predict it or inspire it. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.212.196|108.162.212.196]] 02:18, 12 January 2014 (UTC)

I read this as Megan possibly wanting a 'more than friends' relationship with blonde-hair, but never having the guts to say anything. Her expressing this fear is the closest she has got to saying anything, hence the awkwardness in the following panel. When blonde hair start to question Megan, she quickly interrupts and decide to go do something crazy together. I think I might be reading into things too much... --[[User:Pudder|Pudder]] ([[User talk:Pudder|talk]]) 09:25, 25 September 2014 (UTC)
::That's pretty much what I thought. I read it as the blond thought Megan was hinting at something more than friends, but she actually meant she was putting off her desire to become a Storm Chaser. Randall Monroe? Want to shed some light on this?[[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.77|108.162.219.77]] 19:02, 12 July 2015 (UTC)
::Maybe 'I'm afraid of snakes' is another lesbian reference... --[[User:Pudder|Pudder]] ([[User talk:Pudder|talk]]) 09:26, 25 September 2014 (UTC)

Talk:752: Phobia

2015-07-12T19:01:38Z

108.162.219.77:

"This comic may have references to the movies: Snakes on a plane, Twister, and Thelma & Louise."... and Sharknado.{{unsigned|‎201.76.25.153}}

[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2724064/ Sharknado] wasn't around at the time of this comic, so I removed it from the explanation. Although Randall seemed to predict it or inspire it. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.212.196|108.162.212.196]] 02:18, 12 January 2014 (UTC)

I read this as Megan possibly wanting a 'more than friends' relationship with blonde-hair, but never having the guts to say anything. Her expressing this fear is the closest she has got to saying anything, hence the awkwardness in the following panel. When blonde hair start to question Megan, she quickly interrupts and decide to go do something crazy together. I think I might be reading into things too much... --[[User:Pudder|Pudder]] ([[User talk:Pudder|talk]]) 09:25, 25 September 2014 (UTC)
::That's pretty much what I thought. I read it as the blond thought Megan was hinting at something more than friends, but she actually meant she was putting off her desire to become a Storm Chaser. Randall Monroe? Want to shed some light on this?
::Maybe 'I'm afraid of snakes' is another lesbian reference... --[[User:Pudder|Pudder]] ([[User talk:Pudder|talk]]) 09:26, 25 September 2014 (UTC)

Talk:574: Swine Flu

2014-12-08T18:00:25Z

108.162.219.77:

HANNELOREEC [http://questionablecontent.wikia.com/wiki/Hannelore_Ellicott-Chatham] is a character in the web comic Questionable Content [http://questionablecontent.net/]. Hannelore suffers from OCD and other issues including another anxiety disorder, and even the idea of kissing grosses her out. Her comment in this comic is a typical display of her OCD. {{unsigned|‎64.242.52.33}}

I do not wish to start an edit war, so I shall give my reasoning here for putting this under "furries."
According to ''xkcd'', furries are people with a fetish for animals. Given that Untoward seems to have "gotten intimate" with a pig (hence why he got a venereal disease), I decided that Untoward has an animal fetish, thus concluded that Untoward was a furry.
[[User:Greyson|Greyson]] ([[User talk:Greyson|talk]]) 22:41, 25 November 2012 (UTC)

* I'm pretty sure that all the twitter names are references to other online comics. [[Special:Contributions/69.121.10.82|69.121.10.82]] 04:53, 27 December 2012 (UTC)
* Besides that, such an act does not make one a furry. Instead, it makes one a moron. Furries are in fact simply those who have an interest in anthropomorphic animals. [[Special:Contributions/108.8.100.183|108.8.100.183]] 09:08, 1 January 2013 (UTC)

Anyone else notice the 1918 swine flu pandemic reference? [[Special:Contributions/86.15.83.223|86.15.83.223]] 19:57, 29 December 2012 (UTC)

I think the title text explanation misses a key point, some flu strains (http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/1918_flu_pandemic) disproportionately impact fit healthy young people due to an overreaction of the immune system. The title text humorously suggests that counter-intuitively being drunk and sleep-deprived will actually be good for your health in such circumstances. [[User:Plm-qaz snr|Plm-qaz snr]] ([[User talk:Plm-qaz snr|talk]]) 14:05, 8 July 2014 (UTC)

It may be worth noting that [https://twitter.com/hanneloreEC/status/1626300864 Hannelore's tweet is real].--[[Special:Contributions/108.162.229.123|108.162.229.123]] 11:12, 24 September 2014 (UTC)
:The question is, did Randal and Jeph collude intentionally or did Randal just throw the tweet into the comic? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.77|108.162.219.77]] 18:00, 8 December 2014 (UTC)

Talk:1377: Fish

2014-06-04T13:32:46Z

108.162.219.77:

I took it to mean that we are the camouflaged fish and the extraterrestrials are the shark. We have been naturally selected to be hard to find through some means, probably by distance from a predator life form or just being tiny, and have thus not encountered any of them. -- [[User:Irino|Irino]] ([[User talk:Irino|talk]]) 06:57, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

So, Fermi's paradox is a good defense for why you caught no fish, even though "there's plenty of fish in the sea." [[Special:Contributions/103.22.201.239|103.22.201.239]] 09:06, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

The most probable predator to civilizations is another civilization. There may be civilization out there which is so scary everyone is quiet so they don't find him. Wait ... WE may be that civilization. Half of civilization in our galaxy fears the battleships from our sci-fi shows because they thinks they are real and the other half fears that civilization with that kind of shows is going to build real battleships soon.
Ok, seriously, I already commented elsewhere ... we don't have anything so valuable it would be worth the resources needed for sending attack fleet here. We would need to REALLY piss someone off to be attacked. At least ... physically. Hey, those telescopes searching for signals from other civilization ... how good antivirus protection they have? -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:22, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

:We don't have anything valuable so long as another civilization doesn't need and earth sized supply of calcium, potassium, sodium, nickle, and iron.--[[User:Bmmarti3|Bmmarti3]] ([[User talk:Bmmarti3|talk]]) 12:34, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

::We do have pet ferrets. They are cute, It is unlikely that there is another source of pet ferrets in the galaxy. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.77|108.162.219.77]] 13:32, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

I think the problem is that traditional SETI methods are of dubious effectiveness at actually detecting radio transmissions from other civilizations due to the low initial power of said transmissions which then only get weaker as they propagate. Switch to our new optical methods of planet detection which have detected scores of planets in just a few years and the "paradox" might need to be reevaluated. Optical detection also makes it doubtful that any civilization would be able to effectively hide. [[User:Sturmovik|Sturmovik]] ([[User talk:Sturmovik|talk]]) 12:45, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

1377: Fish

2014-06-04T12:50:49Z

108.162.219.77:

{{comic
| number = 1377
| date = June 4, 2014
| title = Fish
| image = fish.png
| titletext = [Astronomer peers into telescope] [Jaws theme begins playing]
}}

==Explanation==
The {{w|Fermi Paradox}} is the contradiction that arises between the high likelihood of {{w|extraterrestial life}} and the fact that no evidence for it has thus far been found.

[[Cueball]] and [[Megan]] are having a conversation regarding this, when Megan suggests that perhaps our search for extraterrestrial life is like looking at a patch of ocean floor looking for a fish. The diver knows that there must be a fish somewhere, but is unable to actually find it. She then goes on to ask why the fish would be hidden - i.e. camouflaged, and what it means about the remaining fish. The suggestion is that the fish would be hidden to avoid being eaten by predators, and perhaps the reason no extraterrestrial life is sending any sign of existence back is that they would be destroyed soon after they revealed their location.

The final panels take the metaphor further, suggesting that there is literally a planet sized shark swimming through space eating planets, and since we are panning away from earth and out to the shark it is obviously heading our way... And it turns out that Earth is the next fish!

This explains the title text that has the theme from the movie ''{{w|Jaws (film)|Jaws}}'' playing while astronomers look into their telescopes. This may also be a reference to the film ''{{w|Alien (film)|Alien}}'', which was pitched with the three word proposal "''Jaws'' in Space."

By the way, the Chinese sci-fi writer {{w|Liu Cixin}} has published a {{w|Three Body (science_fiction)|trilogy}} called "Three Body", focusing on this idea (he called it "dark forest"): what if all the visible civilizations have been destroyed? What if revealing your neighbor's location to the universe is similar to the MAD situation? The English version should hit the market this year.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}

[Cueball and Megan are walking down a hill]

Cueball: The Fermi paradox keeps getting worse. If planets are common, where '''is''' everybody?

Megan: Imagine you're a SCUBA diver looking at the ocean floor. You know there's a fish there, but you can't see it. Why?

Cueball: Maybe the fish looks like sand.

Megan: Yeah...

[Zoom out to the Earth from space]

Megan: ...and what would that tell you about the ecosystem?

[Pan to a shark swimming through space towards Earth]

{{comic discussion}}

Talk:1305: Undocumented Feature

2014-05-28T03:17:29Z

108.162.219.77:

:;Please never edit existing posts at the talk page! Just add your content! And NEVER edit foreign posts! Use the "Sign Button" on top of editor or type this at the END of your post <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>. This will add the IP or User and a timestamp to the END of your post.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:53, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

This sound pretty cool... Anyone know if it's real or which tool it's in? [[Special:Contributions/173.245.55.222|173.245.55.222]] 05:53, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* its real, there are 8 other users, but must stay a secret. {{unsigned ip|108.162.231.233}}

* There is no secret chat room, stop looking for it. It doesn't exist. Look for your own island on the interweb, don't come spoil ours. [[User:scr_admin|scr_admin]]

Okay, let's be honest: how many of us, upon seeing today's comic, immediately went here to see if it was real or not? --[[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.4|108.162.245.4]] 07:47, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* I honestly did just that. --[[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.137|173.245.53.137]] 08:06, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* I also just did that... [[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.206|108.162.231.206]] 08:07, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* I didn't start up my VM to test it, but I came here to see if was real >.< [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.56|108.162.216.56]] 09:47, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* I also did that. But I take that, if it is real and someone uncovers it, it may destroy that community... [[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.123|173.245.53.123]] 10:28, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* Same here. If it is real, I sincerely hope Randall has a) wiresharked it to find out where this chat room resides so he can prod the admin if it ever goes down b) has a backup plan to migrate himself and his friends to some other private chat room. It won't have the same mystery surrounding it, but at least it's something. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.222|108.162.231.222]] 10:51, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

:;Please never edit existing posts at the talk page! Just add your content! And NEVER edit foreign posts! Use the "Sign Button" on top of editor or type this at the END of your post <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>. This will add the IP or User and a timestamp to the END of your post.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:53, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

It's not about Youtube, but Facebook, which just launched AUTOPLAYING video ads. Look at the title text, it's about Facebook's real name policy. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.232|108.162.231.232]] 08:11, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* I wouldn't limit the scope of this commentary just to Facebook; YouTube's been doing autoplaying video ads for years. YouTube's also been asking for real names recently. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.212.200|108.162.212.200]] 14:26, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* The video ads thing is definitely related to Facebook, but the title text is probably a reference to Youtube recently asking continuously to switch to the real name of google plus account and not the nickname many used on YouTube. Edited the explanation accordingly, since there was no reference to the title text. Spesknight [[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.216|108.162.231.216]] 09:08, 19 December 2013 (UTC)

I just searched after reading - and found this site! -- {{unsigned ip|141.101.99.247}}

* The real secret place is here! {{unsigned ip|108.162.229.75}}

* So THIS is the secret chat [[Special:Contributions/108.162.229.7|108.162.229.7]] 09:50, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* One day this place will be forgotten and so will we. --[[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.197|108.162.231.197]] 09:52, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

anyone else recognizes the wonderful tcp-ip explanation movie of Ericsson [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hymzoUpM0K0 Dawn of the net] in frames 6 till 10? [User:Tesshavon|Tesshavon]] ([[User talk:Tesshavon|talk]])

* Tesshavon you're in my mind ! Also, the 6th frame is comes from one of the most common Friends posters (see e.g. here : [http://www.infinitydish.com/tvblog/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Friends-friends-69087_1024_768.jpg Friends] ) [[User:dandraka|dandraka]]

It's true. Small online communities offer a more folksy experience than the online giants. Some of the best places to hang out are BBS's that made it onto the Internet and have been there for 25+ years. {{unsigned ip|216.150.130.111}}

Well there's always IRC... {{unsigned ip|108.162.221.30}}

:;Please never edit existing posts at the talk page! Just add your content! And NEVER edit foreign posts! Use the "Sign Button" on top of editor or type this at the END of your post <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>. This will add the IP or User and a timestamp to the END of your post.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:53, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

I've rewritten all the explanation.
As far as I'm concerned, I'd remove the incomplete box.
I just keep it because it's likely that someone else will feel something is missing.
[[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.180|173.245.53.180]] 15:27, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

If you're interested in a tightknit community out on the fringes of the Net, go join a MUD. Some are combat oriented, some are roleplay and chat oriented, all are text-based, and many have largely the same exact userbase as they had twenty years ago. - [[Special:Contributions/108.162.212.228|108.162.212.228]] 15:48, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

* If you want a really small and odd community check out the Plato network, you have to emulate a terminal from the late 70's early 80's to use it. --[[User:DECtape|DECtape]] ([[User talk:DECtape|talk]]) 00:27, 15 April 2014 (UTC)

Hmm i think randall also wants to share his believs in the subcontext of the comic, the reason why we live on erth as a random error, the sysadmin who probably sees it all(=god), the question what will happen after all that is gone (his opinion, that our lives are compelty senseless)..etc. {{unsigned ip|108.162.254.161}}

* Anyone else think of comic 37 when reading the last panel (due to the ambiguity of whether he is talking about fucking "video ads" or "fucking video" ads)? [[Special:Contributions/173.245.50.227|173.245.50.227]] 18:31, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

Yes, of COURSE I came here to see if it really exists! I don't know if there's actually a chatroom as described, but Usenet has become much smaller, has no ads, and doesn't require you to know the secret application to get in. IIf a text experience with no ads appeals, dump FB, come back to Usenet! Tell 'em Sea Wasp sent you! :) [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.186|108.162.219.186]] 19:15, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

*Shhh! You're forgetting the first rule of Usenet! [[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.6|173.245.54.6]] 17:57, 19 December 2013 (UTC)

:;Please never edit existing posts at the talk page! Just add your content! And NEVER edit foreign posts! Use the "Sign Button" on top of editor or type this at the END of your post <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>. This will add the IP or User and a timestamp to the END of your post.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:53, 18 December 2013 (UTC)

It's obviously about life and religion. The sysadmin who never writes anything must be there to keep everything running, because else the chat would stop to exist. Like most religions contribute to a god who is never seen or heard. --[[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.232|108.162.231.232]] 08:03, 19 December 2013 (UTC)

I'm wondering if he got this idea from Starship Titanic. They had a very similar thing happen. [http://www.metafilter.com/98848/The-Post-That-Cannot-Possibly-Go-Wrong#3435156 See this epic MeFi comment from the self-described "main web hacker" behind Starship Titanic's web site.] [[Special:Contributions/199.27.128.119|199.27.128.119]] 17:29, 19 December 2013 (UTC)

I've made several edits to clean up the explanation. Not sure whether I should remove the incomplete tag or not. --[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.227|173.245.52.227]] 17:57, 19 December 2013 (UTC)
:Please don't do that. A comic at this size isn't complete within one or two days. Removing the incomplete tag is a minor issue, explaining is the major one. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:46, 19 December 2013 (UTC)

I don't really see why the trivia should be there. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.45|108.162.216.45]] 20:29, 19 December 2013 (UTC)
:This content was moved from the explain section to a trivia section by me. It still needs some rework but it belongs to "old Windows utilities" like Randall is talking about here at the first panel.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:46, 19 December 2013 (UTC)

Reminds me of MUDs. I still check in on New Moon [http://eclipse.cs.pdx.edu/] a few times a year. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.236.25|108.162.236.25]] 16:15, 20 December 2013 (UTC)
:I see what you mean. For me it's the Discworld MUD. But it could similarly (i.e. not exactly like the comic suggests) apply to some long-term Usenet groups that I (in)frequent. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.229|141.101.99.229]] 16:22, 20 December 2013 (UTC)

It may not be the tool from the comic, but people here might be interested in: http://kurlander.net/DJ/Projects/ComicChat/resources.html {{unsigned|Jvfrmtn}}

If this chatroom was real I'd love to see it. I know ts not though. Of course what if there's a little fridge horror in this comic? Like a chatroom 98 sort of thing? Maybe the sysadmin or the people Cueball and the others are talking to are really ghosts or souls that were sucked into an old server forever doomed to spend their days talking to themselves until another unsuspecting user is sucked in.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.36|108.162.215.36]] 02:54, 23 December 2013 (UTC)

Ido: Can someone explain why the URL www.xkcd.com/test reference to this strip? looks like an undocumented feature to me :) {{unsigned ip|141.101.98.220}}

:It doesn't anymore… [[User:Varal7|Varal7]] ([[User talk:Varal7|talk]]) 19:03, 20 May 2014 (UTC)
::It now displays to [[1367: Installing]]. [[User:Z|Z]] ([[User talk:Z|talk]]) 01:11, 23 May 2014 (UTC)

I was doing some searching on the internet, and found, in addition to the one/few on this page, some people who said/implied that they have used this chat before, although, like anything on the internet, the claims may not be true. (Links: http://community.spiceworks.com/topic/436369-does-this-actually-exist [see comments 3, 12, and 14], http://pastebin.com/95nGh8Hk [Says it exists, but doesn't elaborate]) [[User:Z|Z]] ([[User talk:Z|talk]]) 22:02, 12 March 2014 (UTC)

I used to be part of something very similar to to what the comic describes (but not exactly the same). When AOL first started, it was a completely 'walled garden' with no access to the internet. Old folks will remember how popular brands used to advertise on TV that you should go to their 'AOL Keyword' instead of a web site URL. Check Wikipedia for more about this. Anyway, AOL had its own set of message boards, for many popular topics, which were not connected to the internet and could only be accessed by other AOL members. I was just a kid. I went exploring through a bunch of message boards about niche topics until I found one with a community that I came to like. We had all kinds of off-topic conversations, and, the moderators having long since gone, it came to resemble its original topical purpose very little. The ages were not kind to AOL, and our group grew smaller and smaller as the AOL service gained a connection to the real internet (including the WWW and Usenet) and not as many new people bothered to look at AOL-only message boards any more. Eventually, the Keyword that accessed our special board stopped working and it was dropped from the public directory that lists all the areas of AOL. But we found a workaround: AOL had its own quasi-URL system that was mostly only used internally in the software and not usually exposed directly through the UI. But, those of us who had directly bookmarked the message board could still access it that way, and we found a way to share the aol:// URL amongst ourselves. Just like in the comic, we couldn't figure out why the message board still worked at all, for many years after it was no longer publicly visible anywhere, and wondered if some sysadmins with a sense of humour at AOL were watching us. It was fun in a way, a secret place all to ourselves. But it was also kind of sad, when sometimes months would go where noone posted. The UI would sometimes get migrated to a newer version with no notice, and then rolled back again just as abruptly. Old messages would suddenly disappear, become resurrected and then disappear again. Eventually, the thing that finally killed it was that one by one, we each stopped paying for AOL as we found better ISPs and couldn’t justify the expense. It would have been easy enough to move to another web site or chat program, and at first, some of us tried to recreate it elsewhere, but it was never really the same, and we could never get the same group completely back together again. But I guess that's how life is anyway: people drift apart. Despite that, many of us still keep in touch and have become very close friends, some of us even in real life. It's good to have friends. xxj{{unsigned|Xxj}}
:TL;DR! Keep your comments short. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 21:57, 23 May 2014 (UTC)
:If you really didn't read that, Dgbrt, you missed out (what are you, from Twitter? everything has to be 160 characters or the ADD kicks in?). It was worth it, for an old internet hand/AOLer. That is too often how life is, xxj; thanks for posting it. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by nostalgia for some old AOL and GameFaqs message boards, now... [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.77|108.162.219.77]] 03:17, 28 May 2014 (UTC)

1350: Lorenz

2014-04-03T18:28:16Z

108.162.219.77: /* Miscellaneous */ add comic 349 reference

{{comic
| number = 1350
| date = April 1, 2014
| title = Lorenz
| image = 1350_lorenz_loop.png
| titletext = Every choice, no matter how small, begins a new story
}}

{{incomplete|Should the image not just be the first frame wit four of the most common options. This image now gives way too much credit to the politican line of the story - which is less than a fifth of the total... Also all possible dialogues are not yet accounted for (and may never be?)}}

==Images==
For the images that appear in this comic, see [[1350: Lorenz/Images]].

==Explanation==
This is a dynamic comic with crowd-sourced content. In honor of {{w|April Fools' Day}} the comic was posted a day early, on Tuesday instead of the usual Wednesday.

The title 'Lorenz' is referring to {{w|Edward Norton Lorenz}} who among other subjects was famous for {{w|Chaos theory}}. The title is a reference to that the story line of today's comic will include most (all?) of the user submitted dialogue and hence will in nature be chaotic. In addition, the title text, "Every choice, no matter how small", is a reference to the butterfly effect, a phrase coined by Edward Lorenz to describe how a small initial change can lead to wide variations in outcome in a chaotic system.

This comic is an example of a {{w|Choose Your Own Adventure}} story.

===Functionality and bugs===
The reader is initially presented with only one panel where Knit Cap Guy is sitting in front of his computer. The reader is given multiple choices concerning what exactly Knit Cap Guy is thinking. Upon choosing any option, a second panel appears, to give continuity to the story. Each new panel may have a new set of options or just the button "Continue" to see the next panel without making any choice in particular. Eventually, one may reach a dead end in which the story is interrupted and reader is presented with a text box to suggest how it should continue. Some of the suggestions given should eventually become available as new options.

It appears that new panels may be generated by Randall in near real time as user suggestions to dialog is submitted. The dialogue options are likely based on click-through rates and hence will change over day based on which choices are clicked most using {{w|A/B_testing|A/B measurement techniques..}} This will mean that the most popular choices for dialogue line will prevail as the statistics build up. In some cases, dialogue line options do not depend on the continuity of the storyline followed, suggesting that some parts of the story are planned. For example, do several of the storylines involve one of the two main characters waking up and for instance telling the other character, “I had the strangest dream…” or even reliving the dream again. This may be due to common submissions across storylines as well.

Normally, there is a total of 4 options to make: a/b/c/d. Their order changes constantly. Sometimes, there are 3 or fewer options, with the text box to suggest an alternative option. Sometimes, a given panel actually has 5 or more available options, although even in this case only 4 options appear at a time. Refreshing the comic changes randomly which of the available options are visible and which are hidden. As of April 2nd 2014, the existence of 5 or more options seems to occur only in a few rare cases, including the first panel itself.

The last panel always has a "permalink" option which generates a unique URL for all the choices made by the reader -- so for example http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:26c8dcea-b9aa-11e3-8002-002590d77bdd will take you to a particular place in the selected choices.

{{w|HTTP cookie|Cookies}} are required to see this page properly. Without cookies, the next panel will not render.

If you do not have {{w|Javascript}} enabled or visiting the mobile version of the site, you re shown the [[1349|previous page's comic]]. Said comic is visible before Javascript activates.

====Buttons====
Instead of clicking with the mouse you can move more quickly through the panels using the keyboard:
* Up/Down - navigate options
* Enter/Right - choose option after navigating with Up/Down
* Left - go back one panel
* a/b/c/d - choose any option directly

====Bugs====
There seems to be a bug, where <nowiki>xkcd.com</nowiki> (http and https) are the only functioning URLs that display this comic. The URLs <nowiki>www.xkcd.org</nowiki> and <nowiki>m.xkcd.com</nowiki>, don't seem to work, instead displaying the previous comic, [[1349: Shouldn%27t Be Hard]]

As of April 3rd 2014, sometimes an option seemed to disappear completely, cutting off the all the branches of the story it might lead to. When the comic was first published, "Refresh... No new email... Refresh .. No new tweets... Refresh..." was available as one option of the first panel, but not only it became unavailable temporarily, permalinks to it (http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39) ceased to work. This option has since been fixed. However, permalinks to "These stupid tiles... i'll just play one more game." (with a lowercase "i'll") are broken, too, at the moment. ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:ffdd8916-b9a7-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd permalink])

===Themes===

====Miscellaneous====
{| class="wikitable" |
! Name + Example image
! Description
|-
! Arguing [[image:lorenz - discuss.png]]
| The two characters argue with each other
|-
! Boomerang [[image:lorenz - boomerang 1.png]]
| The lone character finds a boomerang on the ground and throws it. The story ends with the boomerang crashing into something off panel, the space rocket from another story branch getting hit, the character getting hit in the face with the boomerang rebound, or the character putting the boomerang down on the ground.
|-
! Computer problems [[Image:lorenz - laptop 1.png]]
| The laptop has an unspecified problem. The two characters attempt to fix it. The story either ends with the two randomly floating in the ocean (with or without circling sharks)(a reference to [[349]]) or with the laptop being melted using a blowtorch (a reference to the previous day's strip, [[1349]]).
|-
! Debate [[File:lorenz - debate 1.png]]
| Knit Cap Guy uses his laptop to watch a debate online between the Politician 1 (on the left) and the Politician 2 ([[Cueball]], on the right), the subject and the actual conversation of which varies according to the storyline. Eventually, they fight each other, the Politician 2 using a lightsaber and the Politician 1 using his bare fists. Subjects debated:
* Politician 1 questions Politician 2's project of tying multiple birds to a car as fuel replacement, which would require some method to make the birds take off in unison. The solutions mentioned are opening and closing an umbrella near them, using a predatory bird to the car to scare them, putting resources in the hands of bird educators for the purpose of training them and employing fiscal hawks. If the Politician 1 points out some problem with the reasoning, often the solution proposed by the Politician 2 would be doing the same in a larger scale. In the end, Hairy visits Knit Cap Guy and points out something happening near involving birds as a direct result of Politician 2's project.
|-
! Dinosaur interruption [[image:lorenz - dinosaur 1.png]]
| A green T-rex interrupts the story and proceeds to stamp on the house the main characters are in. (These are frames borrowed from {{w|Dinosaur Comics}}, a clip-art-based webcomic that uses the same artwork with different captions for every strip.)
|-
! Dreams [[File:lorenz - wake up 1.png]]
| Sometimes, Knit Cap Guy or Hairy find themselves waking from a dream, suggesting that all prior events were just part of they dreaming. Often, in the storylines they fall in the big hole outside Knit Cap Guy's house, they wake up from a dream. Knit Cap Guy also wakes up after watching the debate, in some storylines. Often, the dream loops upon itself, as the characters wake up multiple times in the same storyline
|-
! Space planet [[image:lorenz - rocket 21.png]]
| Eventually the space rocket meets a guy on a very tiny planet. (The Little Prince)
|-
! Space rocket [[Image:lorenz - rocket 1.png]]
| There is a rocket on the ground just outside of the building. The rocket either explodes (with a screenshot from Kerbal Space Program), fails to launch or goes off into space.
|-
! Relativistic encounter [[Image:lorenz - rocket 16.png]]
| The space rocket meets another space rocket that asks a question about relativity, the same one that appeared in [[Choices: Part 2]]. The other space rocket will shoot and destroy the main rocket if the question isn't answered satisfactory. Otherwise the two rockets fly past each other.
|-
! Salesman [[image:lorenz - sale 1.png]]
| Hairy meets [[White Hat]], a salesman with a small stand.
|-
! Thinking [[image:lorenz - thinking.png]]
| One of the characters take a panel or two to think about something.
|}

====Geography====
{| class="wikitable" |
! Name + Example image
! Description
|-
! Hole in the ground [[Image:lorenz - gap.png]]
| Hairy spots a hole in the ground and leans over it to make a comment
|-
! Huge hole on the lawn [[image:lorenz - hole.png]]
| There is a huge hole in the ground just outside of the building. The two characters always end up falling into it and awakening from a dream.
|-
! Tree [[image:lorenz - tree.png]]
| The characters walk past a tree.
|}

====Literature====
{| class="wikitable" |
! Name + Example image
! Description
|-
! LORT
|
|-
! The Little Prince
| Eventually, if the rocket is not destroyed, it may pass by the asteroid of The Little Prince and they have a quick conversation.
|}

====Movies====
{| class="wikitable" |
! Name + Example image
! Description
|-
! Frozen
| In one storyline, Hairy visits Knit Cap Guy and asks him "Wanna build a snowman?", a line from the movie. Possible answers also come from the movie, such as "It doesn't have to be a snowman..."
|-
! Matrix
| In one storyline, Hairy remarks that the gap in the ground is like a glitch in the matrix.
|}

====Video games====
{| class="wikitable" |
! Name + Example image
! Description
|-
! 2048
| A number of storylines begin because Knit Cap Guy is playing {{w|2048}} on his computer. Often, Hairy invites him to go outside to do something related to the game, such as hunting for tiles somewhere.
|-
! Mario
| In the dialogue, Hairy asks Knit Cap Guy "Is this 1-1 from Mario?" upon seeing the gap in the ground. In the platform game {{w|Super Mario Bros.}} for {{w|NES}}, the levels are numbered 1-1, 1-2 and so on. In one branch, he says "Actually, it's the final castle. Grab your Fire Flower!"
|-
! Pokémon [[File:lorenz - pikachu theft.png]]
| Some of the storylines involve Pokémon battles featuring Pikachu, a very popular Pokémon. The battles are drawn in the style of the video games. (A trainer in the left-bottom corner facing the foe in the right-top corner, with a narration box below the scene and the trainer's Pokéballs visible, although some elements are missing, such as the level, gender and HP bar.)

Pikachu uses a number of different moves, though these are mostly made up and are not from the Pokémon games. Pikachu's moves are almost invariably remarked by the narrator as "It's not very effective...", but "It's super effective!" is also possible to appear. In the video games, a move is "not very effective" when the opponent's type resists the attacking move's type and "super effective" when the opponent's type is weak to the attacking move's type. Normally after a few failed attempts, there is an uncomfortable silence as the Pikachu says "Um..." and Knit Cap Guy and Hairy walk away. Pikachu is left in the grass and has time to make his final remarks as the two leave him. Rarely, a suggested move knocks Pikachu out.

One narration line is "Where's Twitch when I need help?", a reference to {{w|Twitch Plays Pokémon}} which was also covered by comic [[1333: First Date]].

Another narration line is: "Google Maps didn't warn me of this.", a reference to [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YMD6xELI_k Google Maps: Pokémon Challenge].

Pikachu's moves:
* Abandonment - Pikachu disappears completely.
* Anguish - Pikachu is sad.
* Ant Colony - Pikachu is covered in ants.
* Cute Face
* Crowdsource
* The Discrete Metric
* Ethylene Dichloride - Nothing seems to happen, but Ethylene Dichloride is a toxic chemical, so there may be future consequences for the characters.
* Extrude - Pikachu's head moves away from his body as his neck becomes long and malleable.
* Faceless - Pikachu's face disappears.
* Friendship - Pikachu is on Knit Cap Guy's head, signifying they are now friends. Friendship, though not a move, is a game mechanic in the video games.
* Granite - Pikachu is atop a block of granite.
* Graph Theory
* Ink Cloud - Pikachu is covered in ink. In the storyline Pikachu uses it, there is the option to "gather" the ink.
* Radicality - Pikachu is on a skateboard.
* Struggle - In one storyline, after Pikachu uses a number of moves, it says: "Now I only have Struggle left. Tie?" In the Pokémon games, when a Pokémon runs out of PP (Power Points, the energy required to use each of its moves) for all its moves, it may only use Struggle, a weak move, indefinitely reusable, that harms not only the opponent but the user as well.
* Theft - Pikachu wears Knit Cap Guy's hat. Pikachu seems to be using "Thief", a similarly-named actual move from the games, that is used to steal the foe's item and use it as its own.
* Uplift - Pikachu's head goes upward, separated from its body, showing a long, thick cable still connecting the head and the body.
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
{{notice|There are many options. Not everyone will see the same options. We are trying to capture as many options as possible in the transcript below. '''The order and options has changed since the transcripter captured the dialogue'''. Often, when a panel is without any choices to make, there is only the option "Continue" to see the next panel. This is a constant work in progress because the comic changes over time.}}

Knit Cap Guy: [Typing on the laptop and thinking.] ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:be7a3304-b685-11e3-8001-94de80a03a29 permalink])

{{beginline}}

{{beginbranch}}
Refresh... No new email... Refresh... No new tweets... Refresh... ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39 permalink])
{{midbranch}}
Hairy:
* So you're still refusing to use Facebook?
* Wanna build a snowman?
* Hey. I hear Godot is in town. Wanna try to meet him?
* You know. Your car's on fire.}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game. (branch 1) ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39 permalink])
{{midbranch}}
[Hairy visits Knit Cap Guy.]
Hairy:

{{beginline}}

{{beginbranch}}
There's something weird out on the lawn.
{{midbranch}}
Knit Cap Guy:
{{beginline}}
{{beginbranch}}
This is an apartment. We don't have a lawn.
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
I have a lawn?
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
I hope it's not a bobcat this time.
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
If you reprogrammed the squirrel laser to target hipsters again...}}
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{endline}}

{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
There's a dinosaur at the door.
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
I heard Home Depot has 1024 bathroom tiles.}}
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
I think I saw a "4096" tile outside somewhere.
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{endline}}

{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game. (branch 2) ([http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:ffdd8916-b9a7-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd permalink])
{{midbranch}}
[Hairy visits Knit Cap Guy.]
Hairy:
* What's with those tiny games you keep playing, anyway?
* Isn't that sort of meaningless?
* Up for a dangerous experiment with no pay?
* You won't believe what just fell off of your roof.}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on.
{{midbranch}}
Laptop: "...and let's go live to the debate."
[Two politicians are debating on TV.]
Politician 1:
* In contrast to my oppponent, who I quote, "Never liked Firefly much to begin with."
* ...but even if you tied enough birds to the car, would you get them to take off in unison?
* And if elected, I vow to win this war on Christmas once and for all!
* I agree with my opponent all all [sic] issues and I think his economic plan is fantastic!}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays.
{{midbranch}}
[Knit Cap Guy is confused, staring at his laptop.]
Knit Cap Guy: ??
Knit Cap Guy:
* Now I just need to look up what a "beard error" is...
* Wait. What's on this other partition?
* Why is Python importing Skynet?
* My keyboard has to support SSH over USB?
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
Gravity. Lots of it.
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{beginbranch}}
Hurry! We're in talks with Facebook.
{{midbranch}}
{{endbranch}}

{{endline}}

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Bobcats]]
[[Category:Boomerangs]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Dinosaurs]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Dreams]]
[[Category:Firefly]]
[[Category:Google Maps]]
[[Category:Linux]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Politics]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]

1045: Constraints

2014-03-27T01:18:25Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1045
| date = April 20, 2012
| title = Constraints
| image = constraints.png
| titletext = [title-text similarly alphabetized]
}}

==Explanation==
An {{w|epigram}} is a brief, interesting, usually memorable and sometimes surprising or satirical statement. {{w|Constrained writing}} is an age-old literary phenomenon, where writers impose rules or patterns in their works. {{w|Haiku}} is a well known example of this.

Just in case you have been living under a rock for the last several years, {{w|Twitter}} is a short message social network / communication service. All messages (known as tweets) on the service need to be under 140 characters, including private messages. It is frequently used by well-known comedians as a place to make interesting jokes and observations.

All the words spoken by [[Megan]], from "Yeah" to "alphabetization", are in reverse alphabetical order. It both answers [[Cueball]]'s question and exemplifies with an ingenious {{w|self-reference}}, while being short enough (136 characters) to be a valid tweet — hence the "whoa."

The title text, "title-text similarly alphabetized", is also backwards-alphabetized and self-referential.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball sits at his computer desk, motioning toward the screen as Megan stands behind him.]
:Cueball: I don't get why authors and comedians spend so much energy trying to be clever on Twitter. Couldn't they put that creativity into more books and scripts? Is there something they ''like'' about the 140-character format?

:[Same picture, only Cueball has his arm down.]
:Megan: Yeah. Writers working under tight restrictions produce novel material — like, for example, epigrams employing backward alphabetization.

:[Cueball remains at his computer desk. Megan is no longer in the frame.]
:Cueball: ...Whoa.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Social networking]]

501: Faust 2.0

2014-03-24T21:26:02Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 501
| date = November 7, 2008
| title = Faust 2.0
| image = faust_20.png
| titletext = The only blood these contracts are signed in is from me cutting my hand trying to open the goddamn CD case.
}}

==Explanation==
E.U.L.A. is short for {{w|End-user license agreement}}, a license that software makers often attach to their software but people do not usually read. Agreement to a E.U.L.A. is assumed when a user uses the software or service that the E.U.L.A. is attached to, which has led to cases where users have unknowingly [http://www.foxnews.com/tech/2010/04/15/online-shoppers-unknowingly-sold-souls/ actually agreed to give away their immortal souls] because of a clause in a E.U.L.A. However, in the European Union, all provisions of these agreements that aren't already codified in law actually are not legally enforceable, unless they could be read and agreed to before purchase and first use.

A {{w|Faustian deal}} is done by someone who sells his soul to the devil for something desired in this life, a textbook example of wanting instant gratification. The mortal will get the things he wanted, but when he dies, have to suffer eternal torment. As the span of a human lifetime is an eyeblink compared to the lifetime of the universe, this is a really stupid thing to do. It is named after the folkloric character Faust, whose story has been the subject of numerous adaptations.

In this instance, Cueball turns a E.U.L.A. around on {{w|Mephistopheles}}, the demon from Christopher Marlowe's version of Faust, by posting a sign saying that anyone entering the room agrees to turn over their ''own'' immortal soul rather than negotiate with Cueball for his. It is unknown whether this clause applies only to demons, or to ''everyone''.

The title text makes reference to how easy it is to cut open one's own hand while trying to open a newly-bought CD case. Incidentally, a pen works just fine, though the blood is referencing how Satanic contracts are signed in blood.

==Transcript==
:Mephistopheles: Mortal! I come offering a deal-
:Cueball: Read the sign.
:Mephistopheles: "By entering this room, you agree to forfeit your own soul rather than negotiate with the mortal residing therein..." Wait, you can't-
:Cueball: Too late.
:Caption: Mephistopheles encounters the E.U.L.A.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

621: Superlative

2014-03-22T20:00:50Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 621
| date = August 10, 2009
| title = Superlative
| image = superlative.png
| titletext = Stay while I recount the crazy TF2 kill I managed yesterday, my friends.
}}

==Explanation==
The comic parodies a famous advertisement campaign for the {{w|Dos Equis}} beer brand. In the campaign, {{w|Jonathan Goldsmith}} plays "{{w|The Most Interesting Man in the World}}", a suave elderly gentleman with a number of astonishing life experiences and skills. The campaign's format generally includes the narrator presenting hyperbolic descriptions of the man's accomplishments, followed by the man delivering his signature catchphrase, "I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.", which has been widely adopted as an {{w|internet meme}}.

[[Cueball]] plays the antithesis of the protagonist in the campaign: the ''least'' interesting man in the world. Unlike the stories in the advertisement, his affairs tend to bore the listeners. Being the generic everyman, he possesses no outstanding capabilities at all. While the original is said to "speak French... in Russian", Cueball seems to have forgotten his French altogether. He also has apparently nothing of interest to tell, either in real life or in his blog. Instead, he will talk away about his weird dreams and his success in video games. Moreover, he is unable to stand too much beer and therefore absolutely ill-qualified to advertise it.

The title text is a reference to the slogan of the campaign "Stay thirsty, my friends." It also references {{w|Team Fortress 2}} (TF2), a multi-platform, multi-player {{w|First-person shooter}} game.

==Transcript==
:He has dreams.
:[Cueball is gesturing to Megan.]
:Cueball: I was in this weird cross between work and my old house...
:Which he'll tell you ''all'' about.
:He can speak French.
:Or could in high school, anyway.
:A little.
:Cueball: Man, I knew all these tenses and stuff once.
:His blog has four posts, all apologies for not posting more.
:[Cueball is sitting at a desk, typing.]
:Cueball: Sorry, I've been trying to think of stuff to put here.
:He is
:The least interesting man in the world.
:[Cueball is sitting at a table. Megan and Ponytail are paying no attention to him.]
:Cueball: I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I stick to a glass or two. Any more and I feel sick.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Internet]]
[[Category:Video games]]

566: Matrix Revisited

2014-03-22T19:28:53Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 566
| date = April 8, 2009
| title = Matrix Revisited
| image = matrix_revisited.png
| titletext = I actually remember being entertained by both the sequels while in the theater. They just don't hold up nearly as well in later comparison.
}}

==Explanation==
In the movie ''{{w|The Matrix}}'', all of humanity lives in a computer simulation. Many years ago, robots took over the real world (not the simulation), and placed humans into the simulation while their body heat generated power for the robots. A few characters (Morpheus, male with glasses; Neo, male without glasses; and Trinity; female) have escaped from the Matrix, and are on a mission to free the human race from the robots. The title of the strip parodies the title of ''The Matrix'''s first sequel, ''The Matrix Reloaded''.

A number of famous scenes from ''The Matrix'' have been parodied:
#Morpheus wants to explain the Matrix to Neo, but says it can't be explained (you must see it for yourself to understand). In the comic, Trinity makes Morpheus look foolish by clearly explaining the Matrix in a single, simple phrase.
#Morpheus shows Neo two pills, one red and one blue, and tells Neo that he can either take the blue pill and return to the simulation, never to hear about the Matrix again, or he can take the red pill and leave the Matrix, and "see how deep the rabbit hole goes" (a reference to "Alice in Wonderland"). In the movie, Neo takes the red pill. In the comic, he mixes the two pills then snorts them like cocaine, and apparently winds up in a bizarre dimension. Note that the inversion of both color and orientation could be intended to evoke the idea of capturing an image on film, which is *really* the only place where Neo and Morpheus exist. It is possible that the combination of pills allowed Neo to break through another layer of the simulation.
#Neo and Trinity must save Morpheus, who has been captured by agents of the simulation. They obtain many guns and load them into trenchcoats. Neo is stopped at a security checkpoint in a building in the Matrix. A security guard tells him to remove any metallic items, such as keys, and place them in a bin, then walk through the scanner. In the movie, he opens his trenchcoat, revealing a myriad of weapons. In the comic, Neo opens his trenchcoat, but the guard's response of "eww" implies that Neo is otherwise naked.
#There are two sequels to ''The Matrix'', but they are widely regarded as inferior to the original, with some fans pretending they don't exist.

==Transcript==
:Today was the ten-year anniversary of the release of ''The Matrix.'' I sat down to watch it again.
:Megan: Holy fuck, ten years ago?

:[Replay of various scenes from The Matrix.]
:[Scene 1.]
::[Morpheus and Trinity are talking to Neo.]
::Morpheus: Unfortunately, no one can explain what the matrix is. You have to see it for yourself.

::Trinity: Sure you can. It's a computer simulation in which you live, thinking it's reality.
::Neo: Oh.

::[Morpheus is now glaring at Trinity.]
::Trinity: ...What? Look, maybe you just suck at explaining.

:[Scene 2.]
::[Morpheus is talking to Neo while holding a red pill and a blue pill.]
::Morpheus: ...Or you take the red pill, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.

::[Neo takes both pills from Morpheus.]

::[Neo crushes both the red and blue pills into purple powder on a table top.]
::''CRUSH''

::[Neo snorts the purple powder.]
::''SNORT''

::[Morpheus and Neo are shown upside down in a frame with inverted colors, i.e., black background with white lines.]
::Morpheus: Now look what you've done.
::Neo: Where are we?
::Morpheus: I have no idea.

:[Scene 3.]
::[Neo, wearing a long, black trench coat, at a metal detector, is accosted by the security guard.]
::Guard: Please remove any keys, metallic items, weapons—

::[Neo opens his trench coat, his back to the reader, towards the guard, who is facing the reader. The reader can't see what Neo has under his coat.]

::[Same scene as above, but side view: Neo, on the left, is opening his coat toward the guard, who is on the right. Nobody speaks.]

::Guard: Eww.

:[End of scene replays.]
:[View of room, where three characters have obviously just finished watching The Matrix. Cueball is sitting on the floor nearest to the TV. Megan is sitting on the floor, farther from the TV. A friend is sitting on a chair, farthest from the TV.]
:Cueball: I forgot how good that movie was.
:Friend: Wanna put on the other two?

:[Cueball has turned to face Megan. They exchange looks without speaking.]

:[View of room, which is now empty, as is the chair.]
:''CRASH''
:''WHAM''
:Friend: Ow! Ow!

:[Cueball and Megan are back in the room, but the chair is still empty. The friend is nowhere to be seen.]
:Cueball: I forgot how good that movie was.
:Megan: Too bad they never made any sequels.
:Cueball: True.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]

1060: Crowdsourcing

2014-03-22T04:02:12Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1060
| date = May 25, 2012
| title = Crowdsourcing
| image = crowdsourcing.png
| titletext = We don't sell products; we sell the marketplace. And by 'sell the marketplace' we mean 'play shooters, sometimes for upwards of 20 hours straight.'
}}
==Explanation==
{{w|Crowdsourcing}} is the practice of obtaining needed services, ideas, or content by soliciting contributions from a large group of people, and especially from an online community, rather than from traditional employees or suppliers. [[Cueball]] "crowdsources" not just ideas, but also the creation of the entire company. Cueball's business is suggested to be helping people with ideas find funding, a la Kickstarter, but rather than setting up their own system to facilitate the process, the business plan instead uses social networks (such as Facebook and Twitter) that already exist, meaning that Cueball's business doesn't affect and isn't involved in the process at all. Cueball seems to be describing this process with buzz-words to impress a group of people who could themselves be businessmen.

In the title text Cueball states that instead of doing any work they play video games, "shooters" refer to first person shooters, for hours on end.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is standing in front of a flowchart on a wall, indicating with a pointer. A man and two women are looking on with interest. One woman holds a briefcase.]
:Cueball: We crowdsource the design process, allowing those with the best designs to connect—
:Cueball: via already-in-place social networking infrastructure—
:Cueball: with interested manufacturers, distributors, and marketers.

:Nobody caught on that our business plan didn't involve ''us'' in any way— it was just a description of other people making and selling products.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

1060: Crowdsourcing

2014-03-22T04:00:46Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1060
| date = May 25, 2012
| title = Crowdsourcing
| image = crowdsourcing.png
| titletext = We don't sell products; we sell the marketplace. And by 'sell the marketplace' we mean 'play shooters, sometimes for upwards of 20 hours straight.'
}}
==Explanation==
{{w|Crowdsourcing}} is the practice of obtaining needed services, ideas, or content by soliciting contributions from a large group of people, and especially from an online community, rather than from traditional employees or suppliers. [[Cueball]] "crowdsources" not just ideas, but also the creation of the entire company. Cueball's business is suggested to be helping people with ideas find funding, a la Kickstarter, but rather than setting up a system to facilitate the process, the business plan instead uses social networks (such as Facebook and Twitter) that already exist, meaning that Cueball's business doesn't actually affect or aid the process at all. Cueball seems to be describing this process with buzz-words to impress a group of people who could themselves be businessmen.

In the title text Cueball states that instead of doing any work they play video games, "shooters" refer to first person shooters, for hours on end.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is standing in front of a flowchart on a wall, indicating with a pointer. A man and two women are looking on with interest. One woman holds a briefcase.]
:Cueball: We crowdsource the design process, allowing those with the best designs to connect—
:Cueball: via already-in-place social networking infrastructure—
:Cueball: with interested manufacturers, distributors, and marketers.

:Nobody caught on that our business plan didn't involve ''us'' in any way— it was just a description of other people making and selling products.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

1345: Answers

2014-03-22T03:52:39Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1345
| date = March 21, 2014
| title = Answers
| image = answers.png
| titletext = Stanford sleep researcher William Dement said that after 50 years of studying sleep, the only really solid explanation he knows for why we do it is 'because we get sleepy'.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Cueball]] claims that humans are driven by their curiosity, which is never-ending. This appears to be a riff on the recurring philosophical question of what separates humanity from the rest of the animals. [[Megan]] answers this blanket statement by observing an apparent paradox: Everyone spends approximately eight hours per day in an unconscious state of sleep, but no one has yet discovered the biological purpose of sleep. This implies that every member of the human species is confronted daily with a mystery, yet no one "loses sleep over it"—that is, almost no one is distracted by this mystery. This implies that Cueball's observed curiosity has a perceptible and proximate limit.

It should be noted that many scientists are in fact busily investigating the reasons that humans sleep, although that inquiry has not resulted in satisfying answers. Some offered explanations are to avoid nocturnal predators, to give the body a chance to repair itself, and to allow the brain a period to sort out long-term from short-term memories.

The title text makes a semi-tautological statement that people sleep only "because we get sleepy." This is an example of question-begging, because getting sleepy only means that someone is feeling the urge to sleep. That this non-explanation is the best answer that a leading sleep researcher can provide, shows how little anyone knows about the subject. This may be an oblique reference to the French playwright Moliere [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/dormitive_principle], who created a satirical character who claimed to have discovered the answer to a popular question: The reason opium makes someone sleepy, said the character (a doctor), was that it contained a "dormitive principle" (i.e., something that makes someone sleepy).

In his comic [[203|Hallucinations]], Randall expressed similar surprise at the lack of interest in the nature of sleep.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Megan are talking.]
:Cueball: Humans are defined by our curiosity, our hunger for answers.
:Megan: We all spend a third of our lives lying down with our eyes closed and '''''NOBODY KNOWS WHY.'''''
:Cueball: Touché.

{{comic discussion}}

690: Semicontrolled Demolition

2014-03-19T20:13:22Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 690
| date = January 18, 2010
| title = Semicontrolled Demolition
| image = semicontrolled demolition.png
| titletext = I believe the truth always lies halfway between the most extreme claims.
}}

==Explanation==
The {{w|World Trade Center}} towers were destroyed on September 11, 2001 (9/11 in American date notation). The planned attack was for two planes to collide with the north and south towers simultaneously, but what ended up happening was that [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7g6V8KZE3GA&t=35s plane 1 hit the north tower at 8:46 am], and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KYE4zViAAg&t=11m44s the second plane hit the south tower a little less than 20 minutes later]. In the ensuing investigation many people raised questions that didn't seem to get a satisfactory answer for several months, if not years. Many people, who called themselves {{w|9/11 Truthers}}, began to claim that the whole thing was a government conspiracy, in what has come to be known as the "controlled demolition plot" (referenced by the title of this comic), which alleges that the towers were brought down not by the fires caused by the planes but by demolition charges intentionally placed there by the government.

[[Randall]] proposes a compromise to make both those who believe in the conspiracy and those who don't happy. Since there is no video of a plane flying into the north tower (as no one expected the crash), that was a government conspiracy. But it just so happened that the government decided to demolish the north tower on the same day that terrorists decided to demolish the south tower.

The title text is a restatement of the {{w|Argument_to_moderation|Golden Mean fallacy}}: that the truth can be found in a compromise between two opposite positions. In this comic, one of the positions is a fanciful conspiracy theory and the other is a sober fact-based conclusion. The error of this fallacy is apparent here, as it can lead to even more ridiculous conclusions. In this case, the compromise theory would make no one happy because both sides would have to concede claims which they have already dismissed as bogus, as well as accept an incredibly unlikely coincidence.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is holding up a pointer to a screen with an image of the World Trade Center towers mid-disaster.]
:Cueball: Based on my analysis, I believe the government faked the plane crash and demolished the WTC north tower with explosives.
:Cueball: The south tower, in a simultaneous but unrelated plot, was brought down by actual terrorists.

:The 9/11 truthers responded poorly to my compromise theory.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Public speaking]]
[[Category:Compromise]]
[[Category:Conspiracy theory]]

883: Pain Rating

2014-03-11T19:21:47Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 883
| date = April 8, 2011
| title = Pain Rating
| image = pain rating.png
| titletext = If it were a two or above I wouldn't be able to answer because it would mean a pause in the screaming.
}}

==Explanation==
In medical examinations, a doctor will sometimes ask the patient to {{w|Pain scale|assess their pain}}, to give the doctor a rough idea of the patient's condition. [[Cueball]] is asked to compare the pain in his arm with the worst pain that he can imagine; however, a one-to-ten scale is not useful for Cueball because the thought of that pain reduces him to a huddled ball. Apparently, he has the capacity to imagine pain so intense that it dwarfs any possible real-world pain, thus skewing the scale.

The title text further emphasizes that idea: If the pain was higher than ''one'' on his pain scale, it would already be so high that he would be reduced to uncontrollable screaming.

==Transcript==
:[Ponytail is carrying a clipboard and consulting with Cueball, who's sitting on a high medical table.]
:Ponytail: Any pain?
:Cueball: My arm really hurts.

:[Megan is standing behind Ponytail, as the panel widens.]
:Ponytail: How would you rate the pain, from one to ten, where ten is the worst pain you can imagine?

:[The patient sits on the table.]
:Patient: The worst pain I can imagine?

:[Cueball ponders this, raising a thoughtful hand to his jaw.]

:[Cueball appears to be shocked.]

:[Cueball is huddled up on the table.]
:Cueball: One.
:Ponytail: ...What the hell is wrong with his imagination?
:Megan: It's not a normal place.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

801: Golden Hammer

2014-03-09T07:43:08Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 801
| date = October 4, 2010
| title = Golden Hammer
| image = golden hammer.png
| titletext = Took me five tries to find the right one, but I managed to salvage our night out--if not the boat--in the end.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Java}} is a programming language touted for its PortabilityTM, which sometimes leads to it being used in systems where it really just shouldn't be used. [[Cueball]] laments that the hardware he's tinkering with, despite being used for a single purpose, has its firmware written in Java; since the microprocessor is unknown, it's quite possible the {{w|Java Virtual Machine}} (JVM) had to be ported over to the processor before the hardware designers could write firmware for it. Presumably, they considered this worthwhile to be able to write the control code in a language they're comfortable with, even though it probably would have been much simpler to just write the control code in whatever language they used to port the JVM in the first place.

[[Black Hat]] explains that this is really an example of an age-old adage: "When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail", also referred to as the "{{w|law of the instrument}}" or, as in the title, the "golden hammer". The hardware developers probably only knew Java, and when they thought about how to write firmware for their new device, "Java" was the only solution that occurred to them.

Of course, instead of a hammer and a nail, Black Hat's analogy is about using bolt-cutters and vodka to get through the lock on {{w|Wolf Blitzer}}'s boathouse. Not-so-coincidentally, Black Hat is holding a pair of bolt-cutters and a bottle of vodka. The implication is that Black Hat ''did'', in fact, break into Wolf Blitzer's boathouse the previous night, which is why he just now entered the door at the start of the strip. The changes he makes to the adage implies that he believes vodka and boltcutters are designed specifically to be used on Wolf Blitzer's boathouse, an interpretation that fits Black Hat's warped and anarchic disposition.

The title text implies that Black Hat had to break into a number of boathouses before he found Wolf's, and that his boat did not survive the evening. The use of the phrase 'our night' allows us to infer that Black Hat may have been with [[Danish]], his partner in crime.

==Transcript==
:[Black Hat is going through a door, a bottle in his hand. A voice speaks to him from off panel.]
:Cueball: Seriously? This thing runs ''Java?'' It's single-purpose hardware!

:[Cueball is sitting at a computer, holding some device which is wired to a box, and pointing at the screen.]
:Cueball: I bet they actually hired someone to spend six months porting this JVM so they could write their 20 lines of code in a familiar setting.

:[Black Hat has a pair of bolt cutters in the hand that had been obscured in the first panel.]
:Black Hat: Well, you know what they say— When all you have is a pair of bolt cutters and a bottle of vodka, everything looks like the lock on the door of Wolf Blitzer's boathouse.
:Cueball: I'm glad ''you ''had a nice night.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Programming]]
[[Category:Language]]

Talk:1335: Now

2014-02-26T23:56:47Z

108.162.219.77:

<pre>| custom = [http://c.xkcd.com/redirect/comic/now]</pre>
This doesn't work. Maybe if we added *.xkcd.com/* to the (external) image whitelist or something? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.121|108.162.231.121]] 07:27, 26 February 2014 (UTC)
:A fine suggestion. I'm probably going to shoot for full archival like we did with [[time]], but this is an ample good solution in the meantime. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 07:30, 26 February 2014 (UTC)
:Hold on, having wee issues, will resolve soon. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 07:37, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

Here is a scaled animation of every image. The full size version was too big for me to upload.
[[File:now-100ms_small6-1.gif|none]]
[[User:Ti84p|Ti84p]] ([[User talk:Ti84p|talk]]) 07:47, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

For Australia and New Zealand, at least, the clock shows local time with summer time factored in. I bet that it undergoes some changes in March and April as various jurisdictions go on or off daylight saving. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.249.224|108.162.249.224]] 09:20, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

: Good point! I added this to the explanation. —[[User:TobyBartels|TobyBartels]] ([[User talk:TobyBartels|talk]]) 13:15, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

:: There's also British Summer Time and all the ''other'' national seasonal adjustments(1)... could you perhaps de-specify the "move the list of North American cities and regions for Daylight-Saving Time (which is the same thing as Summer Time)" statement to remove the inadvertent US-centrism? Maybe "...of northern-latitudes cities for Daylight-Saving Time or equivalent Summer Time designation"..? (Definitely could be better phrased than I just put, though.)
:: (1) Note, they don't even all switch at the same time, necessarily. If Randall is going to change the basic map template (pre-rotation) for any Summer/non-Summer transition, he's probably going to have to do it multiple times each spring/autumn, as various regions jiggle about. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.41|141.101.99.41]] 13:52, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

::: Exactly, they don't all switch at the same time. North America isn't mentioned to be US-centric, it's mentioned because the change happens there first. Sure, we could bring up BST and all the rest, but there's no need to make the discussion longer than necessary. (The original wording also was not US-centric, privileging the non-US term "Summer Time" that's used where it's currently being observed, but somebody changed that.) —[[User:TobyBartels|TobyBartels]] ([[User talk:TobyBartels|talk]]) 18:14, 26 February 2014 (UTC)
::::I made that change just to use the same title as the Wikipedia page to which we are linking. I don't feel strongly about it. --[[User:BlueMoonlet|BlueMoonlet]] ([[User talk:BlueMoonlet|talk]]) 18:46, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

As for the map itself, I think the title text should provide the exact time for the location under the cursor, by doing calculations for the mouseover event and updating the t.t. accordingly. I imagine it is doable for Randall. For accuracy's sake, the Antarctic region could be excluded. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.89.225|141.101.89.225]] 12:19, 26 February 2014 (UTC)
: Or maybe someone'll fancy doing it as a userscript. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.89.225|141.101.89.225]] 12:23, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

I made a version that the user can rotate themselves. It only loads a single image. http://c0la.s3.amazonaws.com/xkcd1335.html {{unsigned ip|173.245.53.182}}

The gif image is very good to understand this comic. However it would be very nice if it rotated a little slower. Instead of one turn every ten seconds it could be one every minute. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.50.84|173.245.50.84]] 14:37, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

: When I look a little off-centre, it always seems that South America is about to catch up with Antarctica, but it never does! —[[User:TobyBartels|TobyBartels]] ([[User talk:TobyBartels|talk]]) 18:14, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

He used an Azimuthal equidistant projection?!?!? ;_; [[User:Swhouseworth|Swhouseworth]] ([[User talk:Swhouseworth|talk]]) 16:20, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

: Yeah, should have been equal area! —[[User:TobyBartels|TobyBartels]] ([[User talk:TobyBartels|talk]]) 18:14, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

Question: If there are 24 Hours in a day, why in the description does it go from hour 0 to hour 21? That's only 22 hours. Where are the other 2 hours? Even if it isn't listed on the comic (I think it's the time zones in the Atlantic between Eastern Brazil and the UK - basically UTC-1hr and UTC-2hr), shouldn't there be spaces in the charts showing those hours? I don't think any of the islands in that region use those time zones (opting instead to use GMT - like Iceland for example), but I think those hours should still be included since they ''are'' on the static part of the map. Also, it makes sense to me that the center of the words ''NOON'' and ''MIDNIGHT'' are edges of segments themselves, making 24 segments in total. Randall just couldn't draw those discrete segments and also easily have the words written for our convenience. --[[User:Dangerkeith3000|Dangerkeith3000]] ([[User talk:Dangerkeith3000|talk]]) 16:46, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

: Every time zone is used somewhere in international waters (well, every one that's a whole number of hours off of Universal Time), so they certainly should all be included. —[[User:TobyBartels|TobyBartels]] ([[User talk:TobyBartels|talk]]) 18:14, 26 February 2014 (UTC)
: Added South Georgia as UTC-2 and Cape Verde as UTC-1. According to Wikipedia, coastal Brazil and Greenland are both UTC-2 during the summer, but Brazil just ended summer time last Sunday (Feb. 23), and Greenland won't start until late March. There are approximately no permanently inhabited places that use UTC-2 all year, so I just went with South Georgia because it's historically significant. [[User:Fryhole|Fryhole]] ([[User talk:Fryhole|talk]]) 20:20, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

Randall's continent naming scheme is interesting. The most commonly taught model in the U.S. has seven continents, but the purple continent is Australia rather than Oceania. The name Oceania is common in Spanish-speaking countries, but those places generally have a six-continent model with the Americas merged. Is Randall's model standard anywhere? [[User:Fryhole|Fryhole]] ([[User talk:Fryhole|talk]]) 20:00, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

Kamchatka is probably a reference to 850: https://xkcd.com/850/ [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.48|108.162.216.48]] 20:22, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

Hey, I'd just like to note that GIMP "Optimize for GIF" reduced the GIF size to 7.1MiB from current 9.3MiB. If I reduced the colours to 32, which still looked "good enough" in my opinion, the GIF was only 3.5MiB.
http://m8y.org/tmp/temp.gif (optimize)
http://m8y.org/tmp/temp2.gif (optimize + colour reduction)

It might be worth replacing to improve load times.
You might want to make your own since I didn't check frame times or anything, I just ran "index" and "optimize" and then exported{{unsigned ip|108.162.219.77}}
:You are right, but that picture should be less then 1MB. I will do some tests, and if it does work I will talk about this. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 23:51, 26 February 2014 (UTC)
::m'k - well. Using 20 colours and scaling it down 50% resulted in 1.1MiB... http://m8y.org/tmp/temp3.gif

Talk:1335: Now

2014-02-26T23:21:05Z

108.162.219.77:

1311: 2014

2014-02-09T16:17:07Z

108.162.219.77: spelling

{{comic
| number = 1311
| date = January 1, 2014
| title = 2014
| image = 2014.png
| titletext = Some future reader, who may see the term, without knowing the history of it, may imagine that it had reference to some antiquated bridge of the immortal Poet, thrown across the silver Avon, to facilitate his escape after some marauding excursion in a neighbouring park; and in some Gentleman's Magazine of the next century, it is not impossible, but that future antiquaries may occupy page after page in discussing so interesting a matter. We think it right, therefore, to put it on record in the Oriental Herald that the 'Shakesperian Rope Bridges' are of much less classic origin; that Mr Colin Shakespear, who, besides his dignity as Postmaster, now signs himself 'Superintendent General of Shakesperian Rope Bridges', is a person of much less genius than the Bard of Avon. --The Oriental Herald, 1825
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Needs information on how much has come true, also information in general. This is also the longest title text?|1311: 2014}}
The comic includes many predictions from the 1800s and early 1900s. Many of them are for the twenty-first century in general, and only three specifically mention 2014 (two of them as in "a century from now").

*It's desirable '''every thing printed should be preserved,''' for we '''cannot now tell how useful it may become''' two centuries hence.
:A good idea. Now, with Google Books, this can be done in an easier manner.

*I predict that a century hence the '''Canadian people''' will be '''the noblest specimens of humanity on the face of the earth''' (1863)
:Notably, there is a common joke nowadays that Canadians are always calm, mellow, polite peoples, even when insulting others.
:The rest of the quote goes as follows: ''all that was good in the Celt, the Saxon, the Gaul and other races, combining to form neither English, Irish, nor Welsh, but Canadians, who would take their place among the churches of Christendom and the nations of the earth.
:This religious prediction probably wasn't believed even by its author. It's only a harangue.''

*In the twenty-first century '''mankind will subsist entirely upon jellies.'''
:Concentrates, which are gelatine like, form a large part of our food sources.
:Absurd if taken literally, but if he's talking about processed foods in general then he's not too far from the mark.

*The twenty-first century baby is destined to be rocked and cradled by electricity, warmed and coddled by electricity, perhaps fathered and mothered by electricity. '''Probably the only thing he will be left to do unaided will be to make love.'''
:Probably an exaggeration even in its time
:But still valid to some degree, as many electronics are used in rearing children today. From incubators, warming blankets, walkie-talkies, etc to the TV.
:On the same coin, however, these are merely tools of assistance; the process of child-''rearing'' is still a human task by and large.
:Of course, with Viagra, Cialis, vibrators, and other kinkier toys, we don't even have to make love unaided.

*To-day, in the city of New York, sixty-six different tongues are spoken. '''A century hence, there will probably be only one.''' (1907)
:False. The number of languages spoken in New York City is believed to be greater than 100; some estimate as many as 800 languages are spoken there. The U.S. Census Bureau reports that in the greater New York metropolitan area, almost 7 million people speak a language other than English at home, including over 3.5 million who speak Spanish, 2 million who speak other Indo-European languages, 1 million who speak Asian or Pacific Island languages, and 300,000 who speak other languages.

*I often think '''what interesting history we are making for the student of the twenty-first century.''' (William Carey Jones, 1908)
:Referring to {{w|World War I}}. In 1908, {{w|Bosnian crisis|Austria-Hungary annexed Bosnia and Herzegovina}}. This led to the {{w|Assassination_of_Archduke_Franz_Ferdinand_of_Austria|Sarajevo Assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria}} in 1914 that is considered the starting event of the World War.

*China may be a '''great shoe market''' a decade or a century from now. (1914)
:While it is true in 2013/14, the context behind it was false, as the premise originally was that the business in the western world could export shoes to China, when currently, most of the shoes are actually manufactured in China itself and exported to western world.
:Ironically though, the profits from the shoe selling go to overseas companies.

*'''We cannot settle the problem,''' and I venture the prophecy that perhaps '''a century from now this same question may be brought before some future society and discussed very much as it is tonight.''' (1914, on abortion)
:True - it is still heavily debated.

*By the twenty-first century '''we shall all be telepaths.''' ''(A character in Aldous Huxley's novel "Antic Hay")''
:Since the quote talks about natural telepathy (like the one apparently birds have) this prediction has not been fulfilled. For example the Wikipedia article on {{w|Telepathy}} states: ''Scientific consensus does not view telepathy as a real phenomenon.''
:More context for this prediction [http://books.google.com/books?id=pdXj2SZ1mT8C&pg=PA205]:
:“And it’s my firm belief,” said Gumbril Senior, adding notes to his epic, “that they [the birds] make use of some sort of telepathy, some kind of direct mind-to-mind communication between themselves. You can’t watch them without coming to that conclusion.” [...] “It’s a faculty,” Gumbril Senior went on, “we all possess, I believe. All we animals.” [...] “By the twenty-first century, I believe, we shall all be telepaths. Meanwhile, these delightful birds have forestalled us.”

*The physician of the twenty-first century… may even criticize the language of the times, and may find that '''some of our words have become as offensive to him as the term “lunatic” has become offensive to us.'''
:While the word "lunatic" isn't considered offensive anymore, but merely derogatory, it would never be used in a clinical sense. At the time this was written, more specific terms such as "schizophrenic" were preferred, but now the noun use of that term (i.e., referring to the patient as "a schizophrenic") is itself deprecated in favor of more humanizing terms like "a patient with schizophrenia."
:He correctly predicts the trajectory of terms like "{{w|mentally retarded}}", itself adopted by his day to replace earlier terms for the intellectually disabled, such as "moron" and "imbecile", which had become pejorative. Soon enough the word "retard" joined them in that regard, and it now has largely been abandoned as a medical term.

*Historians of the twenty-first century will look back with well-placed scorn on the '''shallow-minded days''' of the early twentieth century '''when football games and petting parties were considered the most important elements of a college education.'''
:While media still encourages such images, colleges start to be much more career oriented. Also, due to incidents involving sex-themed frosh weeks, there was actually a greater emphasis to condemn sexual activities among college students

*'''In the year A.D. 2014''' journalists will be writing on the centenary of the great war - '''that is, if there has not been a greater war.'''
:July 28, 2014 marks 100 years since the beginning of {{w|World War I}} (popularly called "The Great War" at the time), thus journalists will definitely write articles of this war. More than 9 million combatants were killed. However, unfortunately, there was a greater war, {{w|World War II}}, which killed around 25 million soldiers and an even greater number of civilians. Due to the larger scope, easily identifiable heroes and villains, and other factors, the second war occupies a much greater place in our collective memory.

The title text refers to a certain British officer, Mr. Colin Shakespeare, who experimented and promoted the use of rope suspension bridges in India, apparently for the ease of colonization and military operations.[http://books.google.com/books?id=aZRPAAAAYAAJ&pg=PA367] The reference to "River Avon" is about the river of {{w|River Avon (Warwickshire)|Avon in Warwickshire}}, Stratford upon Avon being the town where Shakespeare (the playwright) was born and where he lived until his early twenties. The author is aware of the potential confusion that might result after decades or centuries have washed away the context, a topic xkcd has previously covered in [[771: Period Speech]]. As such, the author makes a point separate the two Shakespeares.

==Transcript==
:(This is a series of quotes from various people of various timeframes. Each quote is followed by the author, the document of publication if applicable, and the year.)
:'''Notes from the past'''
:It's desirable '''every thing printed should be preserved,''' for we '''cannot now tell how useful it may become''' two centuries hence.
::Christopher Baldwin
:::1834

:I predict that a century hence the '''Canadian people''' will be '''the noblest specimens of humanity on the face of the earth'''
::Rev. John Bredin
:::1863

:In the twenty-first century '''mankind will subsist entirely upon jellies.'''
::''The Booklover''
:::1903

:The twenty-first century baby is destined to be rocked and cradled by electricity, warmed and coddled by electricity, perhaps fathered and mothered by electricity. '''Probably the only thing he will be left to do unaided will be to make love.'''
::Mrs. John Lane, ''The fortnightly''
:::1905

:To-day, in the city of New York, sixty-six different tongues are spoken. '''A century hence, there will probably be only one.'''
::''The American Historical Magazine''
:::1907

:I often think '''what interesting history we are making for the student of the twenty-first century.'''
::Willian Carey Jones
:::1908

:China may be a '''great shoe market''' a decade or a century from now.
::''Boot and Shoe Recorder''
:::1914

:'''We cannot settle the problem,''' and I venture the prophecy that perhaps '''a century from now this same question may be brought before some future society and discussed very much as it is tonight.'''
::Dr. Barton C. Hirst on the subject of '''abortion'''
:::1914

:By the twenty-first century I believe '''we shall all be telepaths.'''
::Gumbriel, character in ''Antic Hay''
:::1923

:The physician of the twenty-first century… may even criticize the language of the times, and may find that '''some of our words have become as offensive to him as the term “lunatic” has become offensive to us.'''
::Dr. C. Macfie Campbell
:::1924

:Historians of the twenty-first century will look back with well-placed scorn on the '''shallow-minded days''' of the early twentieth century '''when football games and petting parties were considered the most important elements of a college education.'''
::Mary Eileen Ahern, ''Library Bureau''
:::1926

:'''In the year A.D. 2014''' journalists will be writing on the centenary of the great war - '''that is, if there has not been a greater war.'''
::F.J.M, ''The Journalist''
:::1934

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Politics]]

858: Milk

2014-01-23T21:37:30Z

108.162.219.77: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 858
| date = February 9, 2011
| title = Milk
| image = milk.png
| titletext = It's not hard when you have the same thought like 40 or 50 percent of the time.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Megan]] somehow knows that [[Cueball]] is pondering whether he would be able to perform hand {{W|milking}} on her breasts. She gives a startlingly straightforward answer to his thoughts - and Cueball believes she must be psychic to read his thought so precise.

As Megan describes he cannot get any milk from her, since there is no {{W|lactation}} from her breast. In order to lactate, a mammal (including humans) has to give birth before the breasts begin to lactate. See for instance this section on {{W|Dairy_cattle#Management|dairy cattle}}.

The title text makes it plain that it is not so hard for Megan to be psychic on this milking point, as Cueball thinks about this all the time.

==Transcript==
:[Couple sitting opposed, Megan on couch reading book and Cueball a chair with a laptop.]
:Megan: The fact that I have breasts doesn't mean you could milk me now. I'd have to be lactating.
:[A beat passes.]
:Cueball (thinking): Oh my god. She's psychic.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]