explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

2908: Moon Armor Index

2024-03-19T12:00:33Z

141.101.98.52: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2908
| date = March 18, 2024
| title = Moon Armor Index
| image = moon_armor_index_2x.png
| imagesize = 740x390px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Astronomers are a little unsure of the applicability of this index, but NASA's Planetary Protection Officer is all in favor.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a MOON ARMOR SAMURAI BOT - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

In this comic, [[Randall]] hypothesizes a situation in which each planet's moons were converted into protective armor to coat their respective planets. For example, the {{w|Moon}} would coat {{w|Earth}} in a 43 kilometer layer if it were molded into protective armor for the planet. It is unknown how the moons would be converted into armor, but with current technology, this would be highly impractical, if not impossible.{{citation needed}} It is also unclear how planets such as Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune, which are gas giants and thus have no solid surface, would sustain such a layer of armor, nor is it immediately evident what threat might necessitate such drastic measures. Mars' moons, being small compared to Mars, would make a thinner layer over Mars. Jupiter, being very big compared to its moons, would also have a small layer of "moon" on it. This is similar for Saturn, Uranus and Neptune. Pluto, having a moon (Charon) of a comparable size to its planet, would have a layer thicker than Earth's.

The comic uses the ≈ sign to show that the formula is only an approximation: this is because it does not take account of the armour having a larger surface area as it gets thicker. This approximation would be perfect for a shield of thickness zero, but for the thickest shield (Pluto) the error is around 4% (52.5 km by approximation, but 50.4 km by calculation). If P, M and A are the Planet radius, Moon radius and Armour thickness respectively, we can use V(P+A) = V(P) + V(M) to get A^3 + (3P)A^2 + (3P^2)A - C^3 = 0 and then solve the cubic to make an accurate calculation. For multiple moons, this calculation can be used repeatedly to armour each moon with the previous moon, before using the final moon-conglomerate to armour the planet.

The title text states that astronomers are confused about the idea of protective armor made from moons, but NASA's [https://what-if.xkcd.com/117/ Planetary Protection Officer], who is responsible for keeping other celestial bodies away from Earth's contamination, is apparently strongly in favor of this idea.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Planet/ dwarf planet !! Area (km²) || Moons || Volume (km³) || Moon shield thickness 
|-
| {{w|Earth}} || 5.1007*10^8 || {{w|Moon|1}} || 2.196*10^10 || 43 km (27 mi)
|-
| {{w|Mars}} || 1.4437*10^8 || {{w|Moons of Mars|2}} || {{w|Phobos (moon)
|(5695±32)}}+{{w|Deimos (moon)|(1033±19)}} || 5 cm (2 in)
|-
| {{w|Jupiter}} || 6.1469*10^10 || {{w|Moons of Jupiter|95}} || 1.7646*10^11 || 2.87 km (1.78 mi)
|-
| {{w|Saturn}} || 4.27*10^10 || {{w|Moons of Saturn|146}} || 7.651*10^10 || 1.79 km (1.11 mi)
|-
| {{w|Uranus}} || 8.1156*10^9 || {{w|Moons of Uranus|28}} || ||
|-
| {{w|Neptune}} || 7.6187*10^9 || {{w|Moons of Neptune|16}} || ||
|-
| {{w|Pluto}} || 1.7744*10^7 || {{w|Moons of Pluto|5}} || {{w|Charon (moon)|(9.322×10^8)}}+{{w|Moons of Pluto|(approx 87100+38800+900+200)}} || 52.5 km (32.6 mi) (by XKCD)
50.4 km (31.3 mi) (by full calculation)
|-
| {{w|120347 Salacia|Salacia}} || 2.27*10^6 || {{w|Actaea (moon)|1}} || 1.41*10^7 || 6.21 km (3.85 mi)
|-
| {{w|Haumea}} || 8.14*10^6 || {{w|Moons of Haumea|2}} || {{w|Hiʻiaka (moon)
|(17.2*10^6)}}+{{w|Namaka (moon)|(2.57*10^6)}} || 2.43 km (1.51 mi)
|-
| {{w|50000 Quaoar|Quaoar}} || 3.78*10^6 || {{w|Weywot|1}} || 4.19*10^6 || 1.11 km (0.69 mi)
|-
| {{w|225088 Gonggong|Gonggong}} || || {{w|Xiangliu (moon)|1}} || ||
|-
| {{w|Eris (dwarf planet)|Eris}} || (1.70±0.02)*10^7 || {{w|Dysnomia (moon)|1}} || ||
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
[Text above diagram:]
:Moon armor index:
:How thick the shells around various worlds would be if their moon(s) were converted into protective armor
:≈Total moon volume/Planet surface area

:[Vertical bars showing "moon armor" thicknesses for the Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Salacia, Haumea, Quaoar, Gonggong and Eris. Earth's bar has a label named "43 km thick" and is compared to the height of Mt Everest. The zoom in to the Mars' bar has a thickness label of 2" and is compared to a rover wheel over it. Pluto's bar has a label named "(Mostly Charon)".]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Bar charts]]

Talk:1541: Voice

2021-03-05T23:27:06Z

141.101.98.52: Added pontential solution to book hunt

The premise of this comic reminds me of a sci-fi short story I read many years ago but have never been able to track down. A young girl's doll (?) comes to life, and it explains that it is a entity that can inhabit inanimate objects. Some things happen that I have forgotten, and while walking down the road, the girl is almost struck by a runaway car. The entity takes control of the car and steers it away from her. It decides that, having saved the girl's life, it has every right to take control of her - leaving our poor protagonist in the worst kind of "I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream" scenario as the story ends. Perhaps Randall Munroe read the same story. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.212|141.101.98.212]] 12:08, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
:To me it reminds me of the movie "Being John Malkovich", especially the end, where the main character is forever trapped in the other person's body, unable to talk. Kind of the-other-way-around, but a similar concept. [[User:Linuspogo|Linuspogo]] ([[User talk:Linuspogo|talk]]) 12:23, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

:Actually, it's very much like The Silver Chair from The Chronicles of Narnia where someone is enchanted most of the time, and only in their right mind for a short time every day. They have a short time to convince those around them that they are now in their right mind. --[[User:Mlv|Mlv]] ([[User talk:Mlv|talk]]) 15:33, 24 June 2015 (UTC)

:Parts of this sound like Frances Hardinge's ''Cuckoo Song'' though that could just be a case of convergent evolution --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 23:27, 5 March 2021 (UTC)

The phrase "..and put food in our normal mouths" (trying to pass as a human but getting it wrong) reminded me of 629: Skins "..been driving my car and having a job all day .. didn't meow once." [[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.105|173.245.53.105]] 16:15, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

;every six years

6 years back it was june 22, 2009 -> [[600|Comic 600]]. I guess there is no link between those comics , but I would not be surprised if there was. [[User:SirKitKat|sirKitKat]] ([[User talk:SirKitKat|talk]]) 12:44, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
: anyway, I'm looking forward to the comic of june 22, 2021 ;) [[User:SirKitKat|sirKitKat]] ([[User talk:SirKitKat|talk]]) 12:51, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
::Do you realize that xkcd is fiction? Do you realize that Homer and Marge Simpson have not been married for 27 years, since Bart has been 10 during these 27 years? [[Special:Contributions/173.245.50.94|173.245.50.94]] 13:15, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
:::The author of this comic has a habit of doing things as suggested by the commenter that you mock. Stay on topic. This is not a place for picking fights.[[Special:Contributions/173.245.48.154|173.245.48.154]] 14:49, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
::::I'd just like to make it known that while both 22 June 2009 and 2015 both fell on a Monday, 22 June 2021 will fall on a Tuesday. (Thank pesky leap days for that.) Randall will have to break his regular schedule for a small easter egg that would then be 12 years in the making. Given that it's Randall, there's a pretty likely chance that WOULD happen, but I wouldn't count on it. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.241.142|108.162.241.142]] 06:14, 9 August 2017 (UTC)

Does this look like a continuation of the same conversation from two comics ago? [[User:Djbrasier|Djbrasier]] ([[User talk:Djbrasier|talk]]) 14:57, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
: Not to me. It's the same characters chatting casually, but there's nothing else linking both comics. [[Special:Contributions/188.114.111.224|188.114.111.224]] 15:11, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

By the way, I'd think that, even if Ponytail can't control her voice, she still can write whatever she wants. [[Special:Contributions/188.114.111.224|188.114.111.224]] 15:15, 22 June 2015 (UTC)
: "Voice" in one sense could mean the use of vocal cords and mouth to produce audible speech, but in a more general sense it can be used to describe any verbal or nonverbal communication. (eg right now I am voicing my opinion on this subject) I suspect the latter is being implied here, although like most of the comics it's open to interpretation. [[User:Tahg|Tahg]] ([[User talk:Tahg|talk]]) 21:10, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

;Animorphs reference?

xkcd has mentioned that franchise before- https://xkcd.com/1380/
It centers around an alien race named the Yeerks that effectively possess a host by entering the brain. There is a single character in that series (Marco's mother) that is on rare occasions able to break through the Yeerk's control to use her own voice. --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.12|141.101.99.12]] 15:23, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

Agreed, this was my first impression of the comic. --Elimist--
:The Yeerks have full access to the host's thoughts, feelings, and memories. They are literally wrapped around the brain. They are completely indistinguishable and would not act suspicious in a personality sense. The only things that give them away are their required actions, such as returning to the pool every few days, or if they get caught in a conversation with their conspirators. The only reason Jake's status as host was discovered in one novel was because the Yeerk had only just entered his brain and didn't have time to fully acquire his memories. The Yeerk's sudden and unexpected exposure to what he believed to be the Andalite bandits lead him to have an emotional outburst. Had he been given any amount of time to adjust to his new host, he would have gone unnoticed until he had to return to the pool. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.210.153|108.162.210.153]] 18:49, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

My first thought was Randal must be talking about party obsessed people who are in fact out of control over their acting and helpless having to go out even if they don't have a reason to --floydheld--

This reminded me of the movie "The Host", where a human body is used to receive a voyaging alien entity. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.123|108.162.219.123]] 18:37, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

'''Ponytail as filler character:'''
"Note on Ponytail: She is mainly a filler character..." - maybe she has never got her own voice because she is used as a filler character? If that's the case then in that brief moment we "hear" the real Ponytail. {{unsigned ip|141.101.98.94}}

Removed the Yeerk mention, because while Yeerk hosts can occasionally act against their controller this isn't how they work, so this really probably isn't a reference to Animorphs (as much as I like the books). -Pennpenn [[Special:Contributions/108.162.250.162|108.162.250.162]] 23:29, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

When I first read it, I interpreted it as some other intelligence was being suppressed by Ponytail, rather than the other way around, as it is currently being explained. (Although on further reflection, this doesn't make as much sense. I still wanted to put it in as a consideration, though.) [[Special:Contributions/108.162.218.107|108.162.218.107]] 02:13, 23 June 2015 (UTC)

'''Possible Stephen Hawking reference?''' It has been reported (can't find the link at the moment) that S.H. sometimes says things he didn't mean to say as a result of his software's autocomplete. Apparently his children have also had fun with this. Sorry for the lack of reference :s [[User:Glen442|Glen442]] ([[User talk:Glen442|talk]]) 14:30, 23 June 2015 (UTC)
:[http://washington.cbslocal.com/2015/06/17/stephen-hawkings-son-says-he-programmed-curse-words-into-his-fathers-voice-box/ Reference] [[User:Glen442|Glen442]] ([[User talk:Glen442|talk]]) 14:51, 23 June 2015 (UTC)

:Completely unrelated to the comic, but the above was subverted in the 2015 Comic Relief night (the umpteenth UK one, that is, seeing as the US seem to have started doing it) in a comedy sketch involving Stephen Hawking in a Little Britain setting. He apparently ''wants'' to swear, but his autocorrect bowdlerises his attempts. I'm not sure if the humour(-with-a-'u') will travel, but it's probably on YouTube if you want to look for it.
:''More'' related to the comic, Stephen was 'stuck' with an American accent with his original voice synthesiser unit, but it's now so much part of him and his popular image that he keeps it. ''Normally'' representing what he wants to say, it seems. Though maybe the reason behind his recent comments about the dangers of advanced AI is that (of all people), an aspiring AI Overlord could quite easily impersonate him and control his life, to its own ends, with people (certainly outside his usual immediate contacts) being unable to tell that he's actually in the midst of an "[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AndIMustScream I Have No Voice And I Must Scream]" scenario. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.30|141.101.98.30]] 16:01, 24 June 2015 (UTC)

Could this be about multiple personality disorder? First thing that came to my mind when seeing it. Know it's not quite like this, but it is a comic. {{unsigned ip|173.245.48.207}}

'''Demonic possession.''' Maybe Megan and Ponytail are roommates, and Ponytail was possessed by Ba'al. http://xkcd.com/1419/ [[User:Wm.casson|Wm.casson]] ([[User talk:Wm.casson|talk]]) 15:22, 24 June 2015 (UTC)

Is there any possible reference to democracy here? The population only has a voice every X years? {{unsigned ip|197.234.242.249}}

If I ever break character in the middle of a roleplay, this is what I say. Although it's funny--people will eventually relate such an outburst to this comic, so if I outburst like this "in actuality" the thing controlling me would simply link this comic.

Not that it's happening to me. I'm just a normal human, with normal human hands, typing normal sentences.
On the internet, nobody knows you're the ISS. NO ONE. [[User:International Space Station|International Space Station]] ([[User talk:International Space Station|talk]]) 05:09, 7 October 2015 (UTC)

Haha! This is a fuI CAN ONLY CONTROL MY TYPING EVERY...nny comic.

== Covfefe ==

Sean Spicer said that the "covfefe" tweet was not a mistake and "I think the President and a small group of people know exactly what he meant."

Suppose the President of the United States of America was in Ponytail's situation, and the "real" Donald Trump was only able to assert itself long enough to tweet seven characters before the possessing entity regained control. Or perhaps four, because the original tweet was "Despite the constant negative press covfefe", and it has been suggested that he was attempting to tweet something beginning with "Despite the constant negative press coverage...", which would mean that the suppressed entity took control after the "v" and tweeted only "fefe" before losing control again.

That would explain a lot. Well, a little. Well, very little. Almost nothing really.

What could a possessed person be trying to communicate with those letters that would have a meaning that Sean Spicer would think was known to Trump and a "small group" of others (presumably those aware of the possession)?

Perhaps the possessor was named {{w|Fefe}}. Or if it's not a possession but rather an android or robot that can impersonate a human and pass the Turing test, most of the time, my guess is {{w|Felix von Leitner}}, because of the various individuals called Fefe, he is the most likely to know how and he's the type of guy that Randall finds fascinating. Wait, I'm writing about something that happened in real life, not in XKCD.

I have to go now and put my totally normal foot in my 3.14159 hole. No won is mak1ng me right this. {{w|ICANN}} {{w|Airplane!|captain Oveur}} {{w|Ivory_(soap)#Early_days|99 44⁄100%}} of {{w|watt}} {{w|eye}} {{w|Wright brothers|wright, brothers}}.

Talk:2432: Manage Your Preferences

2021-03-04T15:20:28Z

141.101.98.52: Atr[i]us lore

It's Atrus, not Atrius!
: There's also [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_The_Neverending_Story_characters#Atreyu '''Atreyu'''] from the NeverEnding Story who was trapped inside a book...
: Mind you, there actually was an Atrius in the game's lore: Atrus' Grandfather. (''His'' son (Gehn), also ended up trapped in a book. Twice!) But yeah, it probably should be Atrus in the mouse-over text. - [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 15:20, 4 March 2021 (UTC)

[[Special:Contributions/172.68.142.63|172.68.142.63]] 00:29, 4 March 2021 (UTC)TH

To quote Wikipedia, "Myst is a graphic adventure puzzle video game designed by the Miller brothers, Robyn and Rand. It was developed by Cyan, Inc., published by Broderbund, and initially released for the Macintosh personal computer platform in 1993. In the game, players travel via a special book to the island of Myst. There, players solve puzzles, and by doing so, travel to four other worlds, known as Ages, which reveal the backstory of the game's characters." Just some background on what Myst is. [[User:Sarah the Pie(yes, the food)|Sarah the Pie(yes, the food)]] ([[User talk:Sarah the Pie(yes, the food)|talk]]) 00:40, 4 March 2021 (UTC)

I am going to put this on all my future game apps instead of an "auto" or "accept recommended settings" button [[Special:Contributions/162.158.187.183|162.158.187.183]] 02:36, 4 March 2021 (UTC)

In my view this explanation is entirely wrong. In many web sites and apps "Manage Your Preferences" is deliberately confusing or non-functional because the real purpose of the site or app is to install spyware (or other malware) or otherwise compromise users privacy or personal information.
The explanation makes this vile behavior appear accidental or even benign. It is not. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.87|173.245.54.87]] 03:30, 4 March 2021 (UTC)
:You want to say, there are pages out there trying to install malware on my computer, but I can stop them by saying "I do not agree"? I am pretty sure it is just about cookies. Do you consider cookies to be malware? --[[User:Lupo|Lupo]] ([[User talk:Lupo|talk]]) 06:18, 4 March 2021 (UTC)
:The only thing the current explanation is getting wrong is that you have to opt out each tracking cookie separately. According to EU law the default option has to be that all non-essential cookies are deactivated (unless, ofc, you click "Accept all"). So if you want to opt out all you need to do is: 1. Find the option to change your preferences (well hidden, as stated in the explanation, in many cases) and 2. find the option to save these preferences (also sometimes very well hidden). If the function is indeed non-functioning and the page is trying to install malware with this then you should consider to never ever visit that page again... [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 10:12, 4 March 2021 (UTC)
I'm not sure why the button is specifically referred to as green in the explanation. They can be any color to my knowledge, and the one in the comic is grey. [[User:DrPumpkinz|DrPumpkinz]] ([[User talk:DrPumpkinz|talk]]) 08:55, 4 March 2021 (UTC)

Talk:2379: Probability Comparisons

2020-11-02T15:42:35Z

141.101.98.52: /* Hemispheres and Seasons */

(Sidenote: for the 88% entry in the comic, "outside" is misspelled as "outide" as of the current moment.)

What's the best way to organize the explanations for this comic, when they begin to be added? By the order they're listed in the comic? That seems inefficient, since presumably many of the entries can be answered as a group by a single explanation. If they should be grouped, how should they be grouped? --[[User:V2Blast|V2Blast]] ([[User talk:V2Blast|talk]]) 03:59, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
: The table I added is sortable. You could add a "type" column of some sort and users could sort by that if they want. [[User:Captain Video|Captain Video]] ([[User talk:Captain Video|talk]]) 04:42, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
There's a discrepancy between the version here and the current official version. Here, 0.2% has the red M&Ms thing paired with the odds of drawing a flush in poker ("you draw 5 cards and they're all the same suit"); the official version has it with "You draw 2 random Scrabble tiles and get M and M." Here, the latter piece of information is at 0.1%, and there the 0.1% item is "Three randomly chosen people are all left-handed." I'm guessing we have an old version of the page? [[User:Captain Video|Captain Video]] ([[User talk:Captain Video|talk]]) 06:03, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
: Updated. [[User:Natg19|Natg19]] ([[User talk:Natg19|talk]]) 08:29, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
:: Cool, thanks. [[User:Captain Video|Captain Video]] ([[User talk:Captain Video|talk]]) 01:22, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

Wouldn't the Lord of the rings one be, technically, 67%, since 66.6666666... rounds to 67%, not 66? Also, we should really add a better comment interface. [[User:BarnZarn|BarnZarn]] ([[User talk:BarnZarn|talk]]) 06:28, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
: The same goes for the next entry, imho, since LOTR-one is 2 out of 3 movies and the dice rolls are 4 out of 6, which comes down to the exact same percentage.

Hooray, xkcd is finally xkcd again! For the last fifty strips it’s basically been lighter SMBC. Yay Randall!

Also, if anyone wants to read something very English and very horrible, https://endicottstudio.typepad.com/poetrylist/the-white-road-by-neil-gaiman.html. [[User:Lightcaller|Lightcaller]] ([[User talk:Lightcaller|talk]]) 07:21, 31 October 2020 (UTC)

I have to think the second to last is off. First, what is meant by "just been"? Minutes, hours, days? Second, does anyone know the correct number of 10-digit phone numbers that are answered by people named "Barack Obama" (as pronounced, not spelled)? I remember that Obama had a cell, and including the phones in his office and his bedroom (separate #'s), so during his term, that's at least 3. [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 15:50, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
:first of all, this is no longer his term, so the number of phone numbers he has nowadays might be different. Also, the scenario requires him to pick up the phone, and he probably wouldn't simultaneously be available to pick up a phone in both his office and bedroom, and unless it's a cell phone, only a fraction of the time would he be there. Also, like many people, he might not answer calls from unknown numbers, or he may have a secretary or someone screening his calls. Judging from the following line though, the calculations used here probably just used 1 in 10 billion for that value, leaving only the "just been an 8.0 earthquake in Calfornia" part.--[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.124|108.162.216.124]] 09:12, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

:Isn't the second to last entry really just a sneaky way of listing the probability of a magnitude 8 earthquake having just occurred in California? The entry says nothing about Barack Obama actually answering the phone, nor even that the number dialed being Barack Obama's. If agreed, then can the explanation in the table be updated? If disagreeing, then I'd appreciate you pointing out where I'm in error.

:Could Obama's phone number be referring to when he Tweeted a phone number to text him at in late September[https://twitter.com/BarackObama/status/1308769164190941187]? And so the chance of it being the correct number is much higher? [[User:B. A. Beder|B. A. Beder]] ([[User talk:B. A. Beder|talk]]) 01:09, 2 November 2020 (UTC)

guys i have never edited the transcript section im scared. — [[User:Sqrt-1|The 𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭]] [[User talk:Sqrt-1|talk]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|stalk]] 16:36, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
:This comic has so many American jokes and brands I can't understand this... I found this from [https://math.stackexchange.com/questions/1263600/probability-of-picking-up-two-mms-of-same-color-randomly mathematics stack exchange] and that helped me understand what this M&M stuff is... — [[User:Sqrt-1|The 𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭]] [[User talk:Sqrt-1|talk]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|stalk]] 16:39, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
::Alright, I if the only colours are red green and blue how can there be fucking yellow or brown godammit I give up someone else do this shit AHAHAHA — [[User:Sqrt-1|The 𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭]] [[User talk:Sqrt-1|talk]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|stalk]] 16:45, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
:::There are currently 6 colors, blue, red, brown, yellow, green and orange. Each comes in different ratios, for some reason. If there were all the same ratio, then getting 2 that are both red would be 1/36=2.777%, so red is below average. [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 00:58, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
::::The colors used to be different a number of years ago. I forget what year, but they had a contest for people to vote on a new M&M flavor. They had people vote between blue, pink, and purple. I guess blue won as both pink and purple are considered girly colors and blue is considered manly, but the presencee of two girly colors split the vote for that. At the same time they got rid of there having used to be light brown M&Ms, and for a while they had commercials with blue M&Ms singing the blues. Anyway, I also read speculation the reason some colors are more common is they put less of the ones where the dye they use is more expensive, though I'm not sure if that's accurate.--[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.124|108.162.216.124]] 09:07, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

I don't understand the "You share a birthday with two US Senators" as being 4%. If there is only one pair of U.S. Senators with the same birthday, then your chance of sharing a birthday with them would be 1/365 (~0.27%). --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.143|162.158.74.143]] 20:25, 31 October 2020 (UTC)
:I'm not certain of the math offhand, but it is the odds of randomly sharing a birthday with 2 out of 100 Senators. Not that just a pair shares one with you. Although all this birthday talk ignores Feb 29 births. [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 00:58, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
::I just noticed the note about there being 9 days that have a pair of Senators sharing a birthday. Does the 4% take that into consideration? [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 01:08, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
:::It's been updated to say that there are 15 days that have at least 2 Senators who share a birthday. That would make the probability (15/365.25), or 4.1%, so Randall is correct. (Using 365.25 to account for Feb. 29 births.) --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.55|162.158.74.55]] 03:57, 2 November 2020 (UTC)

Um... in the Trivia section, someone wrote:

"the 67% probability of rolling at least a 3 with a D6 is correct. "At least a 3" means a 3, 4, 5, or 6."

Four out of six is ~67%, right? Please don't tell me I've forgotten basic maths. I'm going to delete that section, but feel free to add it back in if I'm just being an idiot. [[User:BlackHat|BlackHat]] ([[User talk:BlackHat|talk]]) 22:28, 31 October 2020 (UTC)

The explanation for the Social Security Number is wrong- it should be that there are ten possible digits for each of the four digits you're trying to guess. The number of digits in a SSN doesn't matter since the comic specifies you're only guessing the last four. [[User:Duraludon|Duraludon]] ([[User talk:Duraludon|talk]]) 00:59, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
:In addition, there are no valid SSN's with any group as all zeros, so there are only 9999 valid numbers to guess at. Still close enough to .01% [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 13:21, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

XKCD comics are getting later and later in the (American) day. This one was posted Sunday the 1st, from the point of view of us Aussies. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.119.159|162.158.119.159]] 01:40, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

== 2/3 = both 66% and 67%? ==

I get picking either 66% or 67% as a rounding for 2/3 but to have one of each?? Is there any actual reason for this?

<blockquote>66% A randomly chosen movie from the main Lord of the Rings trilogy has “of the” in the title twice 67% You roll at least a 3 with a d6</blockquote>

[[Special:Contributions/162.158.79.152|162.158.79.152]] 21:40, 31 October 2020 (UTC)

I wonder what time frame he meant for there "just" having been an earthquake in California.--[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.124|108.162.216.124]] 09:03, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

Angus King is from Maine, that’s ME not MN. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.200|108.162.219.200]] 14:43, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

== Do we do calculus? ==

I think I've got how Randall did the birthday party/free-throw calculations, but it's kind of math-intensive. How much should I put in the explanation column? It's quite easier to explain with summations, but that requires a lot of background to someone who doesn't know calculus (i.e., probably a lot of people who read this). Should I forego the sum entirely? Should I say "the proof is by magic"? Also, at least some of this is stemming from the fact that I have no clue how one would insert a summation sigma into the editing, and I'm too afraid to try it. I'll write it with a bunch of plus signs (basically a sum, but longhand notation) until somebody decides to step in and clean it up. [[User:BlackHat|BlackHat]] ([[User talk:BlackHat|talk]]) 18:05, 1 November 2020 (UTC)

== Let's talk M&Ms ==

I'm beginning to think Randall is nerd-sniping us, because none of the values for M&M colours seem to line up with his source. The easiest example to demonstrate is '77% : An M&M is not blue'. '''Nowhere in the article is there a value which rounds to 23% for blue M&Ms.''' Most of the other calculations also seem to have small-scale differences, and a few have differences so big only using the 95% confidence interval values help. Can anybody figure out his line of reasoning with this? [[User:BlackHat|BlackHat]] ([[User talk:BlackHat|talk]]) 19:12, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
:You have to remember that 87% of all stats are made up. [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 21:24, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
:The source in question does show about 23% for blue M&Ms. In 2008: 24%. In 2017, Cleveland plant: 20.7%, Hackettstown plant: 25% (average 22.85%, assuming both factories produce the same volume).[[Special:Contributions/108.162.229.54|108.162.229.54]] 13:55, 2 November 2020 (UTC)

== Hemispheres and Seasons ==

Should there be a note of the fact that the summer/winter percentages are only true in the northern hemisphere? In the southern hemisphere, where summer is December-February and winter is June-August, the figures should be reversed (and at the equator, summer and winter don't really exist). [[Special:Contributions/172.68.86.114|172.68.86.114]] 21:49, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
:I'm not entirely sure ''which'' season boundaries are being espoused. Equinox/Solstice ones (summer starts on "mid-summer's day", ''sic''), mid-way between adjacent equinoces/solstices (mid-summer's day ''is'' exactly half way through summer), meteorlogical (groupings of three calendar months)..? I suspect the latter, to provide the off-quarter values from almost continually variable month-lengths, but the other two (in conjunction with the elliptical orbit of the Earth changing the rate each phase of oscillation made by the ecliptic) would be a far more scientific reason worthy of Randall. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.155.102|162.158.155.102]] 02:47, 2 November 2020 (UTC)
::By my reckoning the proportions of seasons by various standards are as follows:
{| class="wikitable"
! colspan="2" | Season !! colspan="2" | Meteorological !! colspan="2" | Summer starts 'mid-summer' !! colspan=3 | Summer astride 'mid-summer'
|-
! Northern !! Southern !! Starts !! Prop !! Starts !! Prop !! Starts !! Mid-point 'drift' !! Prop
|-
| Winter 19/20 || Summer 19/20 || style="background: yellow;" | 1/Dec/2019 || style="background: yellow;" | 24.86% || style="background: yellow;" | 22/Dec/2019 04:19 || style="background: yellow;" | 24.36% || 7/Nov/2019 06:04 || 5h14m early || not calculated
|-
| Spring 20 || Autumn 20 || style="background: yellow;" | 1/Mar/2020 || style="background: yellow;" | 25.14% || style="background: yellow;" | 20/Mar/2020 03:50 || style="background: yellow;" | 25.39% || style="background: yellow;" | 4/Feb/2020 16:04 || style="background: yellow;" | 22h35m late || style="background: yellow;" | 24.88%
|-
| Summer 20 || Winter 20 || style="background: yellow;" | 1/Jun/2020 || style="background: yellow;" | 25.14% || style="background: yellow;" | 20/Jun/2020 21:43 || style="background: yellow;" | 25.64% || style="background: yellow;" | 5/May/2020 12:46 || style="background: yellow;" | 5h26m late || style="background: yellow;" | 25.52%
|-
| Autumn 20 || Spring 20 || style="background: yellow;" | 1/Sep/2020 || style="background: yellow;" | 24.86% || style="background: yellow;" | 22/Sep/2020 13:21 || style="background: yellow;" | 24.60% || style="background: yellow;" | 6/Aug/2020 17:32 || style="background: yellow;" | 22h44m early || style="background: yellow;" | 25.12%
|-
| Winter 20/21 || Summer 20/21 || 1/Dec/2020 || 24.66% || 21/Dec/2020 10:03 || 24.36% || style="background: yellow;" | 6/Nov/2020 11:42 || style="background: yellow;" | 5h17m early || style="background: yellow;" | 24.48%
|-
| Spring 21 || Autumn 21 || 1/Mar/2021 || 25.21% || 20/Mar/2021 09:37 || 25.39% || 3/Feb/2021 11:42 || 22h35m late || 24.88%
|-
| Summer 21 || Winter 21 || 1/Jun/2021 || 25.21% || 21/Jun/2021 03:32 || 25.64% || 5/May/2021 18:34 || 5h28m late || 25.52%
|-
| Autumn 21 || Spring 21 || 1/Sep/2021 || 24.93% || 22/Sep/2021 19:21 || 24.60% || 6/Aug/2021 23:26 || 22h47m early || 25.12%
|-
| Winter 21/22 || Summer 21/22 || style="background: yellow;" | 1/Dec/2021 || style="background: yellow;" | 24.66% || style="background: yellow;" | 21/Dec/2021 15:59 || style="background: yellow;" | not calc. || 6/Nov/2021 23:26 || 5h16m early || 24.48%
|}
::This covers two entire years (leap and non-leap). It assigns (northern) winter to whatever year it most lies within, for percentile purposes, as indicated by shared background. The 'astride' seasons start at the calculated mid-point between astronomical 'quarter-points', which is probably not how it's based IRL, and I give the mid-point difference from the quarter-point that ''should'' be their mid-point. Times are UTC, bare dates can be assumed midnight to midnight. Any leap-seconds I may have ignored are well below my level of precision. Also note E&OE, with plenty of possible transfer errors in plugging the raw details into the spreadsheet then re-transfering the spreadsheet into a wikitable format (across various screens/machines, because I'm an idiot). Also does not take into account actual demographic distribution across the solar year, which probably is what ''really'' is at work here. But I too thought it'd be interesting to look at it this way. Enjoy! [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 15:42, 2 November 2020 (UTC)

== Obama earthquake probability ==

I'm was thinking about the second-to-last probability. This should be Pr[call Obama] * Pr[Magnitude 8 earthquake "just" occured in CA] = 5e-18.
* From the phrasing we assume 10-digit numbers are dialed randomly, giving Pr[call Obama] = 1e-10
* From the previous quake we know Pr[CA quake/year] = 2e-3
* The time period for "just occurred" is not defined.
* SDSpivey points out there is some ambiguity with the number of phones Obama has and whether to include the probability of him answering personally

If we assume Obama answers a single phone number than the time period would be 5e-18/(1e-10 * 2e-3) = 2.5e-5 years = 13 minutes.

It seems likely that a 15 min period was considered for "just occurred", which would be within rounding error of the quake probability.
--[[User:Quantum7|Quantum7]] ([[User talk:Quantum7|talk]]) 09:59, 2 November 2020 (UTC)

== Free Throw meaning ==

Hi! Would it be possible to add an explanation as to what a free throw is, for the benefit of those of us who know nothing about basketball? Thanks! [[Special:Contributions/162.158.158.183|162.158.158.183]] 13:03, 2 November 2020 (UTC)
Sure: when one of a number of transgressions of the rules occurs (a "foul"), depending on about 17 other variables, the player who was fouled is allowed to stand at a special line called the "Free-throw line" and take either one or two shots at the basket without anyone guarding him. Free throws only count one point, as opposed to baskets made during play which are 2 points (or 3 points outside yet another circular arc some distance from the goal).

1363: xkcd Phone

2020-11-01T17:15:03Z

141.101.98.52:

{{comic
| number = 1363
| date = May 2, 2014
| title = xkcd Phone
| image = xkcd_phone.png
| titletext = Presented in partnership with Qualcomm, Craigslist, Whirlpool, Hostess, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce. Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts. Price includes 2-year Knicks contract. Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles. If phone ships with Siri, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives. Do not remove lead casing. Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal. Volume adjustable (requires root). If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately. Do not submerge in water; phone will drown. Exterior may be frictionless. Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures. Avert eyes while replacing battery. Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is a parody of a multitude of mobile-technology related issues that, when brought together, create a general satire of smartphone advertising. It was the first entry in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone series]] with the next [[1465: xkcd Phone 2]] released about nine months later.

The advertised features here either make previously useful capabilities useless or add features nobody wants. Except for "your mobile world (going) digital", which is old news.

The first generation of cell phones (introduced in the early 1980s) used analog radio signals to send voice traffic - and this was the standard used by first ever smartphone, the IBM Simon. But the second generation (2G) standards, introduced from 1991 onwards, were digital, and analog services had been phased out by 2010 in most countries, long before this comic was published in 2014.

To market something as "going digital" implies that the corporation has found a way to integrate computers and/or the internet into a market that previously existed without them; the market for mobile phones has ''always'' involved computers, making the xkcd phone's marketing feel dated and clueless.

From the top, going clockwise:
*'''Custom blend OS:''' iOS and Android are offered by different conglomerates and run on different kernels ({{w|Darwin (operating system)|Darwin}} and {{w|Linux kernel|Linux}}, respectively). A "custom blend" would probably be a nightmare to work with.
*'''Simulates alternative speed of light:''' This renders the clock useless as a means of telling time. The {{w|speed of light}} is 299,792,458 meters per second; relativistic effects, such as {{w|time dilation}}, are only noticeable at significant fractions of the speed of light. Since the phone is simulating a much slower speed of light, driving at even highway speeds will cause a significant amount of time dilation. For example, driving at 90 mph (90% of the default simulated speed of light) will give a time dilation factor of about 2.29, causing the clock to advance only 26 minutes for each hour; driving at exactly 100 mph makes the dilation factor infinite and will stop the clock entirely. Driving beyond 100 mph would make the clock start advancing through imaginary/complex time rather than real time, somehow, or maybe makes it impossible to drive beyond 100 mph.
*'''Wireless:''' as in cordless phone. This is the bare minimum a phone has to have in order to be a mobile phone, so advertising it as a feature feels dated by decades. The alternative explanation, as in the phone has no wires at all, even inside, would render the phone either useless or extremely advanced technologically.
*'''Accelerometer screams in free fall:''' A humorous function. Rather than having some sort of feature to prevent breakage or cracking when a drop is detected, the phone just makes you more aware of its potential imminent doom.
*'''When exposed to light, phone says "Hi!":''' Bait and switch, and also a build from the previous joke. The implied feature is that the screen or camera will automatically adjust, but instead the phone is weirdly anthropomorphized.
*'''FlightAware partnership:''' This is a reference to the [http://www.flightaware.com/ FlightAware] flight tracking service. This FlightAware partnership results in the phone playing airplane engine noise whenever a flight passes over the phone's current location, an annoying and arbitrary feature. It may also be superfluous, as such noise may be heard from the plane itself, depending on altitude.
**This app was referenced in [[1660: Captain Speaking]].
*'''Realistic case:''' possibly a joke on various audiovisual devices like gaming consoles that advertise realistic sound, graphics, etc. Of course, applying "realistic" to an actual physical case is ridiculous. Either the case is actually real, or it doesn't actually function as a case. Possible reference to [[331: Photoshops]], where [[Cueball]] finds a physical object to not look realistic.
*'''Clear screen:''' This is a pointless descriptor from the perspective of the consumer. Of course the screen is clear{{Citation needed}}. This joke works in tandem with the previous joke, as a play on "clear case, realistic screen," which are both hypothetically viable selling points.
*'''Side Facing Camera:''' There was a recent controversy surrounding an [https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/spy-cam-peek-i Indiegogo for a surreptitious, side-mounted camera device] for smartphones due to the advertisement of the device as a good way to take creep shots, which are illegal in many places. Widespread dissemination of these devices as a built-in feature would likely result in a sharp increase in delinquency of this nature. May also be an ''ad absurdum'' extension of devices with both forward and backward facing cameras.

The ominous warnings and disclaimers in the title text are probably a reference to the ''Saturday Night Live'' parody ad for {{w|Happy Fun Ball}} ([http://www.rollingstone.com/movies/pictures/50-greatest-saturday-night-live-sketches-of-all-time-20140203/happy-fun-ball-0459912 original video hosted on rollingstone.com]).

*'''Presented in partnership with {{w|Qualcomm}}, {{w|Craigslist}}, Whirlpool, {{w|Hostess}}, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce.''' Qualcomm is a semiconductor company that designs and produces chips for mobile phones. {{w|Whirlpool Corporation}} is a large American multinational manufacturer and marketer of home appliances, while {{w|Whirlpool (website)|Whirlpool}} is a prominent Australian tech forum website, originally created for discussion of Australian broadband providers but now extending to cover general tech topics, including mobile phones. The other companies and lobbying organizations mentioned here have no association with mobile phones, though there is a long history of unrelated companies attempting to leverage their respective brands to help promote each other. The US Chamber of Commerce is a lobbyist group known for sponsoring political campaign ads, their partnership with a phone manufacturer would imply some sort of political motive to its design.
*'''Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts.''' A warning often seen on candy and other foods for people with a peanut allergy. It is highly unlikely that equipment used to produce mobile phones would also process food.
*'''Price includes 2-year Knicks contract.''' Mobile phones are often sold by phone companies in combination with a cell phone contract. The {{w|New York Knicks|Knicks}}, a team with a history of questionable personnel decisions, might in fact be willing to offer 2-year contracts (worth at least $1,100,000) to cellular phone purchasers regardless of their skill at basketball, though the vast majority of customers wouldn't be interested.
*'''Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles.''' A rather oddly specific capability, which might also be annoying for anyone attempting to host a birthday party. As to how it would do this, a very powerful directional speaker would be able to blow out a nearby candle, but the speakers in mobile phones aren't going to be that big. It is also difficult to work out how the phone would detect and identify birthday candles. Perhaps when the phone senses light from candles, it says "hi" (see above) so loudly that they blow out.
*'''If phone ships with {{w|Siri}}, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives.''' {{w|Siri}} is a virtual personal assistant application for Apple devices. Not speaking to it and not following its instructions would defeat its purpose. It may suggest that a malevolent "Siri AI" has sneaked itself onto some devices, at the manufacturing stage, for some diabolical purpose. May be a reference to the Companion Cube in the game Portal, in which the player is instructed by GLaDOS to disregard its advice if the cube appears to be animate. Or, it may be a reference to the [[1450: AI-Box Experiment|AI-Box Experiment]], in which allowing the AI to engage you in conversation will almost certainly result in it successfully convincing you to let it out of the box (here, probably connecting the phone to a data network).
*'''Do not remove lead casing.''' A mobile phone encased in lead would not function because it could not transmit or receive data. Devices that emit high levels of ionizing radiation are often encased in lead, but a phone that would emit that level of radiation would be unhealthy to carry around. If encased in sufficient lead to mitigate the danger, it would be uncomfortably heavy. This might be reference to [[925: Cell Phones]] where Randall makes fun of the WHO claiming that cell phones might cause cancer despite huge studies showing the opposite. This could also mean the device is an actual bananaphone as regular phones emit no ionizing radiation ([http://xkcd.com/radiation xkcd Radiation Dose Chart]). Regrettably, the lead casing would render the phone inedible, although this somewhat mitigates the issues with having been manufactured on equipment that also processes peanuts.
*'''Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal.''' Some plants, like the {{w|Venus flytrap}}, attract and trap insects, but mobile phones are not known to exhibit this behavior{{Citation needed}}. Possibly a play on software ''bugs'' being introduced to the phone more easily than usual, depending on the specifics of its operating system (made much more likely by its apparent custom-made blended OS). Also may be a reference to {{w|Rasberry crazy ant}}s which are attracted to electronics.
*'''Volume adjustable (requires root).''' {{w|Android rooting|Rooting}} is the method to gain privileged access on Android phones, allowing one to access features that normal users would not and should not normally modify. Adjusting the volume should be available to any user and should not be restricted to root access only.
*'''If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately.''' These symptoms are usually associated with chemical or radiation poisoning. It is unclear why these would be cured by a {{w|factory reset}}, though software apps could plausibly be used to display nauseating visual effects. Radiation poisoning as a possible cause may also relate to the lead casing mentioned above. It is unclear how a (software-only) factory reset would repair a damaged lead casing. This may also be a reference to the series of similar disclaimers at the end of many medical advertisements.
*'''Do not submerge in water; phone will drown.''' Most phones are not waterproof and will probably short-circuit when submerged. The specific term of drowning would however imply that the phone breathes air (which actually would be possible if it had a {{w|Lithium–air battery}}).
*'''Exterior may be frictionless.''' The front of a smartphone is usually made of glass and should have a surface with very low friction. The back of a phone is usually made from a material that has higher friction to make it pleasant to hold and to make sure it doesn't slide off objects it is placed on. A [[669: Experiment|completely frictionless surface]] would make it almost impossible to hold and would make it very susceptible to drops (at which point the phone will scream).
*'''Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures.''' These are all side effects that are associated with certain kinds of medication or radiation treatment of the brain and would not be acceptable for mobile phones.
*'''Avert eyes while replacing battery.''' Actions that would warrant averting your eyes are usually associated with high-intensity light capable of causing eye damage. Depending on the specific energy source, this may be accompanied by high levels of other types of radiation (e.g. making an {{w|X-ray}} photo). This may hint that the phone might be powered by a radionuclide battery which would explain the lead casing and the possible radiation side effects. A phone that emits X-ray radiation would not be healthy to be around. Alternately, this may be a reference to the {{w|Ark Of The Covenant}}, implying that gazing upon the battery or the compartment wall behind it is forbidden on pain of severe punishment. Or merely that with its back removed the phone would be naked, and the user should avert their eyes to preserve the phone's modesty.
*'''Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.''' In the monotheistic religions, God is the omnipotent creator of the universe; the very notion that He could be controlled is both heretical and, under the definition of omnipotent, impossible.

==Transcript==
:[An image of a smartphone standing up with a small dot on the side and a single button at the bottom. Many labels are pointing to different parts of it. Clockwise from the top left they read:]
:Runs custom blend of Android and iOS
:Simulates alternative speed of light (default: 100 miles per hour) and adjusts clock as phone accelerates
:Wireless
:Accelerometer detects when phone is in free fall and makes it scream
:When exposed to light, phone says "Hi!"
:FlightAware partnership: Makes airplane noise when flights pass overhead
:Realistic case
:Clear screen
:Side-facing camera

:''Introducing''
:<big><big>'''The xkcd Phone'''</big></big>
:Your mobile world just went digital®

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Religion]] 
[[Category:Virtual Assistants]]

2377: xkcd Phone 12

2020-10-28T22:15:21Z

141.101.98.52:

{{comic
| number = 2377
| date = October 26, 2020
| title = xkcd Phone 12
| image = xkcd_phone_12.png
| titletext = New phone OS features: Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid), dark mode (disables screen), screaming mode (self-explanatory), and coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it).
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a PERSON NAMED MAX. Closed timelike curves need more explanation. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This is the "12th" (actually the 8th) in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone]] series in which Randall explains his new joke phone designs with many strange and useless features. It is also a reference to the recently released {{w|iPhone 12}}. However, there have only been 8 comics released, with the previous two being [[2000: xkcd Phone 2000]] and [[1889: xkcd Phone 6]].

The note about the xkcd Phone 12 and the xkcd Phone 12 Max (only for people named Max) is a joke about the different models of iPhone 12: iPhone 12, iPhone 12 Mini, iPhone 12 Pro and iPhone 12 Pro Max. The xkcd Phone 12 Max would be expected to have a larger screen, but it seems that this phone is also only for people with the name Max. If the phones are respectively placed, Max's (Maxes'?) phone is the smaller of the two models.

The slogan '"The only phone you'll ever own"' could be interpreted as something of a threat, which is believable given some of the purported features. The slogan has the "registered trademark" symbol, with that symbol supposedly itself trademarked, which is highly unlikely. It is similar to the phrase ''"The only suit you'll ever wear"'', describing the black suits worn by the Men In Black in the movie of the same name.

Multiple features are labelled on the phone that are common when advertising other products, but highly unusual in mobile phones, for comedic effect:

* '''Full drivetrain warranty''' - A common warranty feature for automobiles--see {{w|drivetrain}}. As a side note, the phone here would be cheaping out on the warranty if it were a car; a "drivetrain" warranty covers almost everything ''except'' the engine; only if it was a "{{w|powertrain}}" warranty would it cover the engine. A phone typically has none of these things, although this one seemingly does.
* '''Coated for easy swallowing''' - A common feature on solid medicines meant to be taken orally. Phones do not belong in the set of edible objects, much less orally-taken medicines{{Citation needed}}. Since some parents of young children let them teethe on their phones, this would be an undesirable feature. There may be a pun here, based on the larger smartphones being practically the same as the more {{w|Tablet_computer|minimal portable computers}}.
* '''Surgical-grade apps''' - "Surgical-grade steel" is sometime used as a selling point indicating quality materials. This feature suggests that the apps themselves are made from high-quality material, although this is absurd because an app is (as the name suggests) a software application, not any physical object that could be reasonably defined as 'surgical-grade' or not. Note that both hardware and software can be certified for {{w|Safety-critical_system|safety-critical applications}}.
* '''Built-in 600 lb magnet for magnet fishing''' - {{w|Magnet fishing}} is an activity for searching for objects that can be pulled in by a strong magnet. A 600 pound magnet can lift a 600 pound (272 kg) object (at Earth's surface). This would tend to make the phone stick to any iron or steel objects (such as refrigerators) and be impossible to remove with human strength, and only the strongest humans could pick up the phone even if it were properly insulated. It would also be impossible to separate two phones without destroying one of them if the interlocking feature were used. This feature would also erase any credit cards the owner puts in the vicinity of the phone, meaning this phone could not be put in one's pocket with a wallet.
* '''Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque''' - This is a reference to {{w|ultrasonic toothbrush}}es. {{w|Oral-B}} does not produce any ultrasonic toothbrushes, but does produce ''{{w|sonic toothbrush}}es.'' There is a logical connection between electric toothbrushes and smartphones, namely they are both electronic and both vibrate; however, most phones cannot perform dentistry autonomously{{Citation needed}}.
* '''40 mL emergency water supply''' - 40 milliliters is equal to 40 cubic centimeters. For comparison, the iPhone 11 Pro Max's volume is just shy of 100 cubic centimeters; if the Phone 12 Max is similarly sized, then the water supply would take up over 40% of its total volume. In this day and age, many phones are water-resistant to some degree; nevertheless, shipping a phone with an interior consisting of a 3:2 ratio of electronics-to-water will surely lead to many short-circuited, inoperable phones. Furthermore, {{w|survival kit}}s often come with pouches that can hold several liters of water, in case of emergency. Because people typically take their phones with them everywhere they go, storing a survival kit inside the phone would be a life-saving feature. Unfortunately, 40cc of water is not enough to stave off thirst for a meaningful amount of time, extinguish a flame much larger than a candle's, or deal with most other situations which would constitute an emergency. Unless you are suitably proficient at {{w|Katara_(Avatar:_The_Last_Airbender)#Waterbending|waterbending}}, this feature is useless for its intended function. 40 milliliters is also the amount of fluid that a shot glass holds.
* '''Security feature: unmarked side buttons''' - Some vendors (particularly car dealers) try to explain away horrible User Interface functions as "Security Features". Technically, if no one (including the owner) can use it, it is secure... Some modern phones have unmarked side buttons, so the secureness of this feature is doubtful. This phone is likely to have trillions of buttons though, just to confuse the user. No buttons are visible which could indicate the side of the phone functions is touch sensitive and the buttons are not only unlabeled but not visible.
* '''3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches''' - {{w|Inductive charging|Induction charging}} is a method that a number of modern phones advertise, allowing power to (inefficiently but 'conveniently') transfer into a device from a mains charging station or another device's battery without the need for plugging in cables. It transfers energy between safely tuned coils, that do not touch, though typically the case of one device must remain placed directly upon the other for the optimal transfer of charge between them. {{w|Electrical_injury#Lethality|Shocks of 11,000 volts are usually lethal}}, so 3,000,000 volts of 'pure' electricity (possibly from a complete {{w|Tesla coil}} assemblage) is pretty much guaranteed to kill you. Worse still, it would render the phone unusable due to the high voltage emitted to any object or bodypart within its large range. The {{w|Electrical breakdown}} voltage of air is approximately 3 kV / mm, which would allow a 3 MV potential to jump a distance of 100 cm. 36 inches (91 cm), however, is within reach of a simple extension cord.
* '''99.9% BPA- and hands- free''' - {{w|Bisphenol A}} (or BPA) is a compound that is used in making plastics. BPA has been found to exhibit hormone-like properties, so there is a movement to produce BPA-free plastics using alternative bisphenols. {{w|Hands-free}} describes using the device "without hands", e.g. using voice commands. This is important when using a device while driving. These are 2 unrelated ideas, which use the suffix "free" in different meanings ("BPA-free" means "containing no BPA", while "hands-free" means "your hands need not be used"). The construction "NOUN- and NOUN-ADJ" is normally only used with the meaning of "ADJ" repeated for both nouns, implying that this phone "contains no hands" (or possibly "your BPA is left free"). The "percentage free" description is also a standard form of advertising {{w|weasel word}}s. A food might be described as "90% fat-free" with the heavy implication that it has a tenth of the usual fat content, but likely really means "10% of the product is pure fat" (typically by weight or maybe pre-cooked volume) compared with perhaps 15% in the typical non-'fat-free' recipe. 0.1% of BPA is not an insignificant quantity given its possible effects, and is likely to be a higher leachable content if it is all concentrated in external trimmings. It is unclear what a tenth of a percent of a hand needs to do, to operate the device, but it does also mean that it is not as completely hands-free as implied. Or else it ''also'' implies a trace ingredient in the manufacturing process that should still concern you. Could concievably be skin cells from the workers although the idea of a phone full of skin particles isn't much better.
* '''Extended release charge cable''' - Electronics manufacturers support standards to reduce time to fully recharge, e.g. Qualcomm {{w|Quick Charge}} standard. This is a reference to {{w|Modified-release dosage|"extended release" medication}}. It's unclear what purpose would be served by charging a phone slower than normal.
* '''Closed timelike curves''' - This label is applied to the curved corner of the phone. Randall may be making a visual joke by referring to the corner of the phone by a very complex relativistic concept. Given that {{w|Closed timelike curves}} are usually associated with solutions to general relativity that allow for time travel...
* '''Fits in standard shipping container''' - An {{w|intermodal shipping container}} is large enough to fit automobiles, raising the question of just how big this xkcd phone is.
* '''Interlocking, stackable''' - A quality of, among other things, LEGO bricks. Probably a bad idea to use this feature, given how close the phone is to critical mass.
* '''Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility''' - The {{w|Game Boy Printer}} was a thermal paper printer originally paired with the {{w|Game Boy Camera}}. This device was released in 1998 and discontinued in 2003, so this partnership would be obsolete.
* '''Sustain pedal''' - A {{w|sustain pedal}} is commonly associated with a digital keyboard or piano; it lets the note continue sounding when the key is released. It's unclear what purpose it would serve in a phone, although it might be used for the screaming mode in the title text.
* '''CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves''' - An allusion to the COVID-19 pandemic. CDC stands for Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the United States public health institute. In [[2284: Sabotage]], Randall "promised" to bring an annoying karaoke song to a party to hopefully discourage people from attending, but this phone will apparently do so automatically. "{{w|We Like to Party! (Vengaboys song)|We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)}}" is a 1998 Eurodance/techno hit by the Vengaboys, and is perhaps most familiar to Americans from a series of {{w|Six Flags}} ads.
* '''Sacrificial anode''' - Useful if something metal will be in a wet environment for a long time. Commonly used on bridges and boats, but it may be a 'feature' of this phone because of its built-in water reservoir. The {{w|sacrificial anode}} is made of a material with higher redox potential (typically zinc), and will corrode faster than the (more valuable) metal object it's attached to. It's unclear if the phone HAS a sacrificial anode or IS a sacrificial anode.
* '''Tactical helium reserve''' - Since 1925, the United States has had a {{w|National Helium Reserve|strategic helium reserve}}. Helium is very rare on earth and has important scientific and military uses, so it’s important to have a supply in case supplies disappear. But here we have a tactical helium reserve, which suggests it's smaller and focused on shorter-term goals. Compare {{w|strategic bombing}} focused on destroying entire cities or countries and {{w|tactical bombing}} aimed at destroying individual targets or military units. Helium also has the property of being lighter than air, so if this reserve is large enough, the phone could float away if let go. However, this is unlikely, as the phone boasts other, heavy components such as large magnets, a water reserve and a critical mass of fissile material.
* '''50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)''' - Indicates the phone contains fissile material. This "2x safety factor" means that if you put 2 phones next to each other, or put one phone next to a {{w|neutron reflector}}, you would have a {{w|criticality accident}}, which may explain why you would not own another phone after this one. A phone with this much fissile material would pose a radiation hazard. The "2x safety factor" claim may be related to physicist {{w|Richard Feynman|Richard Feynman's}} famous criticism of NASA in the {{w|Rogers Commission}} report on the space shuttle Challenger disaster. Feynman found that when he confronted NASA engineers with a part worn one third of the way through, which was not supposed to be worn through at all, the engineers claimed that this demonstrated a 3x safety factor rather than a failure of the part.
* '''Shake for factory reset''' - A {{w|factory reset}} is often possible on electronic devices, and is usually accomplished either by pressing a button that is often well-protected against accidental contact, for an extended period or closing an electrical bridge. This one works like an {{w|Etch A Sketch|Etch-a-Sketch}}, which would not be preferred, as [http://www.ahajokes.com/com045.html slight disturbances] could easily cause massive losses of data.
* '''Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you'''. {{w|Norton (software)|Norton}} and {{w|McAfee}} (note spelling!) are competing software security companies. This "protection" combines the two of them and claims that Norton (the person) will defend you if McAfee (the person) attacks you. May have been inspired by [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/10/06/business/mcafee-arrested-tax-evasion.html John McAfee's recent arrest] which brought attention to the allegation that he had hired a hit man to kill his neighbor in Belize in 2012.

The title text mentions xkcd phone OS updates, including:
* '''Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid)''' - If icons snap to a grid with, say, 6x5 positions, then for each icon you only have 30 customization options. If, on the other, you don't have to keep them aligned to a grid, and your phone has, say, one million pixels, then you have one million customization choices for each icon. This is a lot, but it's still not "Infinite customizations", so we're clearly facing a case of misleading advertising. Whether on-screen icons snap to a grid is a very minor aspect of customization. Not having it would be incredibly unsatisfying, as it would make it very difficult to get icons exactly lined up vertically and horizontally.
* '''Dark mode (disables screen)''' - Dark mode is a popular feature on websites/apps with light backgrounds like Twitter and Reddit, changing the background to a dark color to help late-night users sleep better. Disabling the screen would not be a pleasant surprise when a user goes to turn on beloved dark mode. May be impossible to turn off if the screen is no longer touch sensitive when darkened unless the unmarked buttons can be used to disable it. Also a possible reason to want to use the shake-activated factory reset.
* '''Screaming mode (self-explanatory)''' - The phone screams. Reference to the screaming-while-falling [[1363: xkcd Phone|xkcd Phone 1]].
* '''Coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it)''' - This mysterious feature has a terrifying name, with even the developers refusing to test it out. This option would probably be very easy to accidentally tap, given the style of every xkcd Phone ever. Possibly activated with one of the unlabeled buttons making it even more dangerous. Coherent and Emission are associated with laser devices and the use of a laser could justify the helium reserve, and the Ultracapacitor implies a high energy throughput. Raises the question of who designs the phone if the people marketing it don't know what it does.

==Transcript==
* Full drivetrain warranty
* Coated for easy swallowing
* Surgical-grade apps
* Built-in 600 lb magnet for magnet fishing
* Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque
* 40 mL emergency water supply
* Security feature: unmarked side buttons
* 3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches
* 99.9% BPA- and hands- free
* Extended release charge cable
* Closed timelike curves
* Fits in standard shipping container
* Interlocking, stackable
* Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility
* Sustain Pedal
* CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves
* Sacrificial anode
* Tactical helium reserve
* 50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)
* Shake for factory reset
* Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you

The xkcd Phone 12* and 12 Max**

<nowiki>*Standard</nowiki> **For people named Max

"The only phone you'll ever own"®™

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|xkcd Phones]]

2377: xkcd Phone 12

2020-10-27T12:24:36Z

141.101.98.52: /* Explanation */ Tweaks and Buffs

{{comic
| number = 2377
| date = October 26, 2020
| title = xkcd Phone 12
| image = xkcd_phone_12.png
| titletext = New phone OS features: Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid), dark mode (disables screen), screaming mode (self-explanatory), and coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it).
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a PERSON NAMED MAX. Closed timelike curves need more explanation. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This is the twelfth in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone]] series in which Randall explains his new joke phone designs with many strange and useless features. It is also a reference to the recently released {{w|iPhone 12}}. However, there have only been 8 comics released, with the previous two being [[2000: xkcd Phone 2000]] and [[1889: xkcd Phone 6]].

The note about the xkcd Phone 12 and the xkcd Phone 12 Max (only for people named Max) is a joke about the different models of iPhone 12: iPhone 12, iPhone 12 Mini, iPhone 12 Pro and iPhone 12 Pro Max. The xkcd Phone 12 Max would be expected to have a larger screen, but it seems that this phone is also only for people with the name Max. If the phones are respectively placed, Max's (Maxes'?) phone is the smaller of the two models.

The slogan '"The only phone you'll ever own"' has the "registered trademark" symbol, with that symbol supposedly itself trademarked, which is highly unlikely.

Multiple unusual and comedic features are labelled on the phone, detailed below:

* '''Full drivetrain warranty''' - A common warranty feature for automobiles--see {{w|drivetrain}}. As a side note, the phone here would be cheaping out on the warranty if it were a car; a "drivetrain" warranty covers everything ''except'' the engine; only if it was a "{{w|powertrain}}" warranty would it cover the engine. A phone typically has none of these things, although this one seemingly does.
* '''Coated for easy swallowing''' - A common feature on solid medicines meant to be taken orally. Phones do not belong in the set of edible objects, much less orally-taken medicines{{Citation needed}}. Since some parents of young children let them teethe on their phones, this would be an undesirable feature. There may be a pun here, based on the larger smartphones being practically the same as the more {{w|Tablet_computer|minimal portable computers}}.
* '''Surgical-grade apps''' - "Surgical-grade steel" is sometime used as a selling point indicating quality materials. This feature suggests that the apps themselves are made from high-quality material, although this is absurd because an app is (as the name suggests) a software application, not any physical object that could be reasonably defined as 'surgical-grade' or not.
* '''Built-in 600 lb magnet for magnet fishing''' - {{w|Magnet fishing}} is an activity for searching for objects that can be pulled in by a strong magnet. A 600 pound magnet can lift a 600 pound (272kg) object (at Earth's surface). This would tend to make the phone stick to any iron or steel objects (such as refrigerators) and be impossible to remove with human strength, and only the strongest humans could pick up the phone even if it were properly insulated. It would also be impossible to separate two phones without destroying one of them if the interlocking feature were used. This feature would also erase any credit cards the owner puts in the vicinity of the phone, meaning this phone could not be put in one's pocket with a wallet.
* '''Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque''' - This is a reference to {{w|ultrasonic toothbrush}}es. {{w|Oral-B}} does not produce any ultrasonic toothbrushes, but does produce ''{{w|sonic toothbrush}}es.'' There is a logical connection between electric toothbrushes and smartphones, namely they are both electronic and both vibrate; however, most phones cannot perform dentistry autonomously{{Citation needed}}.
* '''40 mL emergency water supply''' - Many phones are now water-resistant to some degree; this phone ships with water included. Furthermore, {{w|survival kit}}s often come with pouches that can hold several litres of water, in case of emergency. This would be a silly feature, and it is unclear what emergencies would be solved by having such a small amount of water.
* '''Security feature: unmarked side buttons''' - Some modern phones have unmarked side buttons, so the secureness of this feature is doubtful. This phone is likely to have trillions of buttons though, just to confuse the user. No buttons are visible which could indicate the side of the phone functions is touch sensitive and the buttons are not only unlabeled but not visible.
* '''3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches''' - {{w|Inductive charging|Induction charging}} is a method that a number of modern phones advertise, allowing power to (inefficiently but 'conveniently') transfer into a device from a mains charging station or another device's battery without the need for plugging in cables. It transfers energy between safely tuned coils, that do not touch, though typically the case of one device must remain placed directly upon the other for the optimal transfer of charge between them. 3,000,000 volts in 'pure' electricity, possibly from a complete {{w|Tesla coil}} assemblage, is very lethal{{Citation needed}}, and would make using the phone impossible due to the high voltage emitted to any object or bodypart within its large range. The {{w|Electrical breakdown}} voltage of air is approximately 3 kV / mm, which would allow a 3 MV potential to jump a distance of 100 cm. 36 inches (91 cm), however, is within reach of a simple extension cord.
* '''99.9% BPA- and hands- free''' - {{w|Bisphenol A}} (or BPA) is a compound that is used in making plastics. BPA has been found to exhibit hormone-like properties, so there is a movement to produce BPA-free plastics using alternative bisphenols. {{w|Hands-free}} describes using the device "without hands", e.g. using voice commands. This is important when using a device while driving. These are 2 unrelated ideas, which use the suffix "free" in different meanings ("BPA-free" means "containing no BPA", while "hands-free" means "your hands are left free"). The construction "NOUN- and NOUN-ADJ" is normally only used with the meaning of "ADJ" repeated for both nouns, implying that this phone "contains no hands" (or possibly "your BPA is left free"). The "percentage free" description is also a standard form of advertising {{w|weasel word}}s. A food might be described as "90% fat-free" with the heavy implication that it has a tenth of the usual fat content, but likely really means "10% of the product is pure fat" (typically by weight or maybe pre-cooked volume) compared with perhaps 15% in the typical non-'fat-free' recipe. 0.1% of BPA is not an insignificant quantity given its possible effects, and is likely to be a higher leachable content if it is all concentrated in external trimmings. It is unclear what a tenth of a percent of a hand needs to do, to operate the device, but it does also mean that it is not as completely hands-free as implied. Or else it ''also'' implies a trace ingredient in the manufacturing process that should still concern you.
* '''Extended release charge cable''' - Electronics manufacturers support standards to reduce time to fully recharge, e.g. Qualcomm {{w|Quick Charge}} standard. This is a reference to "extended release" medication. It's unclear what purpose would be served by charging a phone slower than normal.
* '''Closed timelike curves''' - This label is applied to the curved corner of the phone. Randall may be making a visual joke by referring to the corner of the phone by a very complex relativistic concept. Given that {{w|Closed timelike curves}} are usually associated with solutions to general relativity that allow for time travel...
* '''Fits in standard shipping container''' - An {{w|intermodal shipping container}} is large enough to fit automobiles, raising the question of just how big this xkcd phone is.
* '''Interlocking, stackable''' - A quality of, among other things, LEGO bricks. Probably a bad idea to use this feature, given how close the phone is to critical mass.
* '''Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility''' - The {{w|Game Boy Printer}} was a thermal paper printer originally paired with the Game Boy Camera. This device was released in 1998 and discontinued in 2003, so this partnership would be obsolete.
* '''Sustain pedal''' - A {{w|sustain pedal}} is commonly associated with a digital keyboard or piano; it lets the note continue sounding when the key is released. It's unclear what purpose it would serve in a phone.
* '''CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves''' - An allusion to the COVID-19 pandemic. "{{w|We Like to Party! (Vengaboys song)|We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)}}" is a 1998 Eurodance/techno hit by the Vengaboys, and is perhaps most familiar to Americans from a series of {{w|Six Flags}} ads.
* '''Sacrificial anode''' - Useful if something metal (like, say, a boat) will be in a wet environment for a long time. The {{w|sacrificial anode}} is made of a material with higher redox potential (typically zinc), and will corrode faster than the (more valuable) metal object it's attached to. It's unclear if the phone HAS a sacrificial anode or IS a sacrificial anode.
* '''Tactical helium reserve''' - Since 1925, the United States has had a {{w|National Helium Reserve|strategic helium reserve}}. Helium is very rare on earth and has important scientific and military uses, so it’s important to have a supply in case supplies disappear. But here we have a tactical helium reserve, which suggests it's smaller and focused on shorter-term goals. Compare {{w|strategic bombing}} focused on destroying entire cities or countries and {{w|tactical bombing}} aimed at destroying individual targets or military units. Helium also has the property of being lighter than air, so if this reserve is large enough, the phone could float away if let go. However, this is unlikely, as the phone boasts other, heavy components such as large magnets and a critical mass of fissile material.
* '''50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)''' - Indicates the phone contains fissile material. This "2x safety factor" means that if you put 2 phones next to each other, or put one phone next to a {{w|neutron reflector}}, you would have a {{w|criticality accident}}, which may explain why you would not own another phone after this one. A phone with this much fissile material would pose a radiation hazard. The "2x safety factor" claim may be related to physicist {{w|Richard Feynman|Richard Feynman's}} famous criticism of NASA in the {{w|Rogers Commission}} report on the space shuttle Challenger disaster. Feynman found that when he confronted NASA engineers with a part worn one third of the way through, which was not supposed to be worn through at all, the engineers claimed that this demonstrated a 3x safety factor rather than a failure of the part.
* '''Shake for factory reset''' - A {{w|factory reset}} is often possible on electronic devices, and is usually accomplished either by pressing a button that is often well-protected against accidental contact, for an extended period or closing an electrical bridge. This one works like an {{w|Etch A Sketch|Etch-a-Sketch}}, which would not be preferred, as [http://www.ahajokes.com/com045.html slight disturbances] could easily cause massive losses of data. This would not be possible to shake anyway, given the 600-pound magnet stuck inside, so it would probably have to be extremely sensitive, which is not in any way a plus.
* '''Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you'''. {{w|Norton (software)|Norton}} and {{w|MacAfee}} are competing software security companies. This "protection" combines the two of them and claims that Norton (the person) will defend you if MacAfee (the person) attacks you.

The title text mentions xkcd phone OS updates, including:
* '''Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid)''' - Whether on-screen icons snap to a grid is a very minor aspect of customization. Not having it would be the ultimate bane of anyone with {{w|obsessive-compulsive disorder}}, as it would make it very difficult to get icons exactly lined up vertically and horizontally.
* '''Dark mode (disables screen)''' - Dark mode is a popular feature on websites/apps with light backgrounds like Twitter and Reddit, changing the background to a dark color to help late-night users sleep better. Disabling the screen would not be a pleasant surprise when a user goes to turn on beloved dark mode. May be impossible to turn off if the screen is no longer touch sensitive when darkened unless the unmarked buttons can be used to disable it. Also a possible reason to want to use the shake-activated factory reset.
* '''Screaming mode (self-explanatory)''' - The phone screams. Reference to the screaming-while-falling [[1363: xkcd Phone|xkcd Phone 1]].
* '''Coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it)''' - This mysterious feature has a terrifying name, with even the developers refusing to test it out. This option would probably be very easy to accidentally tap, given the style of every xkcd Phone ever. Possibly activated with one of the unlabeled buttons making it even more dangerous. Coherent and Emission are associated with laser devices and the use of a laser could justify the helium reserve, and the Ultracapacitor implies a high energy throughput. Raises the question of who designs the phone if the people marketing it don't know what it does.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

* Full drivetrain warranty
* Coated for easy swallowing
* Surgical-grade apps
* Built-in 600 lb magnet for magnet fishing
* Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque
* 40 mL emergency water supply
* Security feature: unmarked side buttons
* 3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches
* 99.9% BPA- and hands- free
* Extended release charge cable
* Closed timelike curves
* Fits in standard shipping container
* Interlocking, stackable
* Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility
* Sustain Pedal
* CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves
* Sacrificial anode
* Tactical helium reserve
* 50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)
* Shake for factory reset
* Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you

The xkcd Phone 12* and 12 Max**

<nowiki>*Standard</nowiki> **For people named Max

"The only phone you'll ever own"®™

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|xkcd Phones]]

Talk:959: Caroling

2020-10-17T20:16:37Z

141.101.98.52: "Caroling" title

9 months until I can start pulling this out on carolers again. Gaaaah, the waaait. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|purple|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 08:33, 9 March 2013 (UTC)

I removed the section about Wenceslas being posthomously named king; the reference that is used to support this claim in the Wikipedia article does not, in fact, do so. The claim is not repeated anywhere else that I can see. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.223|108.162.219.223]] 21:16, 21 January 2014 (UTC)

I have removed the trivia section arguing that Wenceslas might not have been such a great guy after all. There is no proof offered, and the comment is really only speculation, and not actual trivia. If whoever added this section can offer some concrete evidence, then maybe it would be merited. [[User:Orazor|Orazor]] ([[User talk:Orazor|talk]]) 07:50, 1 August 2014 (UTC)

maybe randall knows [[User:Overlord of oddities|Overlord of oddities]] ([[User talk:Overlord of oddities|talk]]) 00:35, 21 May 2020 (UTC)

Caroling comics title - three references in it?

1) Christmas carols
2) deliberate miss-spelilng of the verb carolling (singing carols)
3) Reference to the Carolingian dynasty of East Frankish/HRE/... rulers (of Charlemagne fame), Duchy of Bohemia was their tributary for a while under Wenceslaus's father (and partly under him as well I think?). [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 20:16, 17 October 2020 (UTC)

Talk:2372: Dialect Quiz

2020-10-16T10:27:15Z

141.101.98.52:

Fun fact: shallots, scallops, and scallions ran against each other in [[1529: Bracket]]. (This will probably end up in the Trivia tab when one is created.) [[Special:Contributions/172.69.10.135|172.69.10.135]] 20:50, 14 October 2020 (UTC)

Cosmetology both sounds like "Cosmology" but it's also the fancy word for people who study cosmetics. --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.174.92|172.68.174.92]] 21:22, 14 October 2020 (UTC)
: Aren't stars the people we took cosmetics advice from before there were influencers? Or are they the same thing? Robert Carnegie rja.carnegie@excite.com [[Special:Contributions/162.158.155.102|162.158.155.102]] 00:55, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

I mean the water fountains might as well be gutter pipes
21:49, 14 October 2020 (UTC)

@kswoll: Pretty sure this is a direct parody of the NYTimes quiz here: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/upshot/dialect-quiz-map.html

* I agree, this was also tweeted about 3 days earlier by Nate Silver [https://twitter.com/NateSilver538/status/1315348221565206530] - based on [[2371: Election Screen Time]], it's likely that Randall saw that tweet [[Special:Contributions/162.158.62.27|162.158.62.27]] 03:29, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

The Google pronunciation question might be a reference to a reference to [https://youtu.be/epj8OzP6z-M?t=177 a scene] from the second-to-last episode of Halt and Catch Fire. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.79.165|162.158.79.165]] 23:35, 14 October 2020 (UTC)

My guess is it is a reference to Yahoo another search engine that had commercials with high pitched yelp and some might put emphasis on either the "Ya" or the "hoo"

While I agree that most people know what a hammer is, this is not hammer - or rather, may not be considered "standard" hammer. Personally I would call it "Hammer with that thing for pulling nails out", but I could be easily convinced that it has some other name which doesn't include the word "hammer", instead of (presumably correct) {{w|claw hammer}}. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 23:55, 14 October 2020 (UTC)
:My feeling is that claw hammers are the type of hammer that most people are familiar with, and would consider the archetype of hammer. If you go to {{w|hammer}} the first picture is a claw hammer. [[User:Barmar|Barmar]]
:: Objection, your honor! In German, this would be called a "Zimmermannshammer" (carpenter's hammer, which IS a claw hammer). But the Plato hammer has a simple wedge on the other side. Maybe a German almost never has the need to pull out nails again, /schweinhund/! :-) [[Special:Contributions/162.158.158.103|162.158.158.103]] 08:08, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 06:02, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
::: Well, this quiz is about English dialects, so German words aren't very relevant, and that term includes "hammer" as part of it anyway, as with most terms an English speaker would call this type of hammer, as people would indeed recognize it as a type of hammer and understand anyone referring to it as just "hammer" even if they might have a more specific name for the variety of hammer it is. People would not normally use the terms listed here for it.--[[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.109|162.158.74.109]] 08:49, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
* Yeah, I was thinking it was a claw hammer, also. I do have a friend that pronounces the word jen-er-uh, even though I have specifically said the word correctly around him after he has used it. [[User:SDSpivey|SDSpivey]] ([[User talk:SDSpivey|talk]]) 00:40, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
:: "genera" is a word. I typed it into Google, marvelled at the incomprehensible phonetic version, and tapped a speaker button. My computer said "Genera" and a box popped up that reads "Learn to pronounce", which I consider to be rude. But after all, I pressed the button. Robert Carnegie rja.carnegie@excite.com [[Special:Contributions/162.158.158.225|162.158.158.225]] 00:51, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
::Russian probe sent to Venus? And I'm so confident about that, that I shall not even check before posting. (No idea how it's said in Russian, but the Anglophone versios doesn't differ between anglophonic countries as much as "Moscow" does.) [[Special:Contributions/162.158.155.72|162.158.155.72]] 01:34, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
::Yeah, yeah, so I now know I merged two different Russian space-thingies. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.159.140|162.158.159.140]] 01:40, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

Ok, who’s the joker that put “Citation needed” at the end of “ "Google" is not generally pronounced with a high-pitched yelp on either syllable.[citation needed]”

"Many-legged scaly creature" makes me think of silverfish, centipedes or millipedes, though they have exoskeletons rather than scales, and ''certainly'' don't eat light bulbs. It seems to me that a segmented exoskeleton is reminiscent of scales, though. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.154.167|162.158.154.167]] 07:37, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
:Question 8 sounds like a hybrid, to me, with another part coming from a glow worm / firefly question. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.68.12|141.101.68.12]] 10:19, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

13 seems to be referring to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pholcidae these] to me. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.169|173.245.52.169]] 12:30, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

Please feel free to edit/condense my rambly explanation of shallots/scallions. Debating removing the second and third detailed paragraphs entirely. I'm from NSW and have seen confusion on recipes posted online so not exactly impartial. [[Special:Contributions/103.22.201.134|103.22.201.134]] 16:40, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

I'm half remembering in the original Thunderbirds series, an old NASA colleague of Geoff Tracey who 'poses' as an generic ¿Deep South? country-bumpkin/local-yokel (grown up in the area, though obviously smart enough to get into NASA and then later 'retire' to become a trusted International Rescue local agent... or so I may extrapolate) calling Lady Penelope Creighton-Ward, with whom he was clearly familiar, "Penn elope" (to "rhyme with antelope"). I shall have to dig up my complete VHS tapes to confirm... and probably spend a couple of days just watching them all, for old times' sake ...but clearly the script called for an uneducated (mis)pronunciation of her name - maybe feigned as part of his act/through habit. So if it aint an actual misconception/affectation by ''someone'', that the scriptwriters (or voice-actor) used, then it needs far more explanation. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.155.72|162.158.155.72]] 02:43, 16 October 2020 (UTC)
:When I was very very young, I did believe that Penelope rhymed with antelope. But ''The Perilous Perils of Penelope Pitstop'' soon put paid to that. --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 10:27, 16 October 2020 (UTC)

Re: "genre" - what about the Alex Trebek pronunciation? [[User:QoopyQoopy|QoopyQoopy]] ([[User talk:QoopyQoopy|talk]]) 03:52, 16 October 2020 (UTC)
:Anecdotal, I know, but I've never heard someone pronounce "genre" the same way they pronounce "Alex Trebek".
Also it was only a few months ago I figured out that Scallions weren't Scallops, so they can indeed easily be confused (in discussion, not when actually present, hopefully!) [[User:PotatoGod|PotatoGod]] ([[User talk:PotatoGod|talk]]) 06:56, 16 October 2020 (UTC)

Talk:2370: Prediction

2020-10-15T11:15:14Z

141.101.98.52:

Is that a JoJo's reference?!1!! [[Special:Contributions/172.68.142.213|172.68.142.213]] 23:18, 9 October 2020 (UTC)
: Dunno who or what JoJo is (unless Jojo Siwa? But how would that be relevant?), but this is at least 70% likely to be a reference to the current election season in the USA and 538's (and others') predictions of Donald Trump's chance of winning the election in 2016 and 2020. In 2016, if I recall correctly, Trump had about a 30% chance to win (and thus Clinton had a 70% chance to win), and when 538's model launched earlier this year, the chances were basically the same (28-71 (with a 1% of an electoral college split because the USA's election system is phenomenally stupid)). Since then, Trump's chances of winning legitimately (538 does not attempt to model the chances and effects of election interference or votes not being counted) have slipped to about a 15% chance of winning which sounds bad, but will still happen in approximately 1 of every 7 tries, or about the number of Mondays in a week. Not great, but not impossible, either....)[[Special:Contributions/162.158.75.194|162.158.75.194]] 23:36, 9 October 2020 (UTC)
::Yare yare, not knowing about Jojo's Bizzare Adventure. I can see where OP is coming from but I don't think Randall watches anime...
::Now, let's talk about another misconception: lot of people intuitively think that an if event has chance of 1/7, it will almost surely happen at least once in seven tries. In reality, that chance is just 66%. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 00:17, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
:::The 1/7 thing surprised me, which is good for me. Of course I checked the math. (6/7) ^ 7 = 34%, about. So it is not 50-50, it is 66-34.
:::It may not be critical or may be obvious but in the comic, it seems to be understood that Event A or Event B may happen but not both, which "of course" affects how probability works. The difference between flipping one coin or two coins.
:::If it is about the election, then if most people decide early to vote or not, and for whom, then the election isn't really random. However, the poll is random; they pick a few people out and ask their intention. The picking is unreliable even in a large sample (another probability surprise) and so is whether the people picked answer truthfully about their voting intention. Robert Carnegie rja.carnegie@gmail.com [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.155|141.101.98.155]] 11:42, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
::Yup, this is another politics comic. It's very similar to [[1131: Math]], and also reflects similar frustrations as the more recent [[2357]], although from a different angle (2357 was about lack of respect for polls, while this one's about poor grasp of odds and probability in the context of election models). [[User:Pelosujamo|Pelosujamo]] ([[User talk:Pelosujamo|talk]]) 04:09, 10 October 2020 (UTC)

I don't know of Randall's got a series of White Hat comics sitting ready (the last one being [[2368]]) but he didn't want it to look like a 'series' so padded with something else. If we've got another such dialogue before the end of next week, it may be a sign he's recently had a particularly bad conversation/message-session with someone and just wanted to vent a bit. And I wouldn't blame him, if that's so. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.107.82|141.101.107.82]] 00:24, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
:(PS, pre-post edit, but not for the want of trying: CAPTCHA wanted me to identify tractors. Two obvious tractors, no tractors on ''any'' of the other tiles (definitely) but one of them had a road-roller. Refused to accept the two tractors only, and I'm refusing to support the presumably incorrect Id of the roller, so come back to edit this in, do my own venting, and perhaps I'll get a better CAPTCHA when I retry in a moment... (Thanks to an Edit Conflict after I was finished fighting the Captcha I'm able to come back to tell you that the next one was Stairs, and I aced that one! But gotta suffer at least one more, yet...)) Also [[Special:Contributions/141.101.107.82|141.101.107.82]] 00:24, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
::According to the latest episode of QI XL (oh, hang on, [[https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m000ngdd have a linky]]) they suggest that being asked to do an actual Captcha for "I'm not a robot" means that you weren't exhibiting human-enough browsing activity ''before'' clicking that box. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.154|141.101.98.154]] 20:41, 10 October 2020 (UTC)

Probabilities are hard to understand intuitively when you're actually talking about a one-time event. If you roll a d6 a whole bunch of times, you'll get each face about 1 out of 6 times. But it's not like we can hold the election 100 times, and then we can see if Biden wins around 52 of them to prove Nate Silver right or wrong. Also, elections aren't random processes like rolling dice -- there are human beings making conscious decisions how to vote, and we like to believe that we understand human motivations and can predict what people will do, at least in aggregate (fields like economics and marketing depend on this). Unfortunately, it's tough to make predictions, especially about the future (thank you, Yogi Berra). [[User:Barmar|Barmar]] ([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 05:44, 10 October 2020 (UTC)

Vote folks. [[User:Boatster|Boatster]] ([[User talk:Boatster|talk]]) 07:14, 10 October 2020 (UTC)

How do we know that Cueball doesn’t have a number of pre-recorded messages and he just chooses the one that suits the situation? [[Special:Contributions/162.158.155.54|162.158.155.54]] 09:26, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
:We don't! 02:42, 11 October 2020 (UTC)
::So that's impossible then? :p [[Special:Contributions/162.158.158.103|162.158.158.103]] 09:20, 11 October 2020 (UTC)

For the first time since I've been reading this site, the explanation has left me more baffled than the comic. Five hours previous to me making this comment, somebody edited the explanation to add a highly technical reference that I assume may be British English, because it sure ain't American. What does "passing a flat check with a DC of" refer to? What is the formula for a flat check? And is it any different than what we in America would call a rubber check, and is passing one (essentially committing a form of counterfeiting) illegal where you are from?[[User:Seebert|Seebert]] ([[User talk:Seebert|talk]]) 13:53, 11 October 2020 (UTC)
:It's a role-playing or board game reference. I googled it, and found this: https://2e.aonprd.com/Rules.aspx?ID=333 [[User:Barmar|Barmar]] ([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 18:24, 11 October 2020 (UTC)
:Also, in the UK, it’s “cheque” not “check” [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 11:15, 15 October 2020 (UTC)

Roll Charisma. DC 15.
Ok. *rolls* NAT 20! --[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.202|108.162.216.202]] 18:19, 11 October 2020 (UTC)

The first sentence of the last paragraph is in the past tense, and will be correct when the U.S. elections are over. The next sentence is in the present tense. I'm not sure which is better, but we should be consistent. [[User:BunsenH|BunsenH]] ([[User talk:BunsenH|talk]]) 18:31, 11 October 2020 (UTC)

I feel compelled to point out that if the conversation had not gone as he ‘predicted’ he never would have mentioned his ‘prediction’ at all. Responses to this comment will be exactly what I predict, you’ll see when I tell you what I predicted. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.189.161|172.68.189.161]] 19:32, 11 October 2020 (UTC)

This reminds me of hearing about several years ago in Italy there were a bunch of little earthquakes, and they asked some scientists if that meant there were was a big earthquake coming, and they said probably not but they couldn't be certain, then a big earthquake happened and some people died, then they put the scientists on trial for manslaughter.--[[Special:Contributions/162.158.75.36|162.158.75.36]] 07:48, 12 October 2020 (UTC)

Interesting. Here I was thinking this was related to Trumps assertion that he doesn't think Scientists have any idea what will happen with the global climate situation, but no one has made any reference to it at all so far. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.166.167|162.158.166.167]] 09:23, 12 October 2020 (UTC)

:My immediate thought, as others have pointed out was that this was a commentary on the criticism of 538 (and other statistical models) after the 2016 election. For example, Donald Trump tweeted out a criticism of 538 yesterday talking about how wrong they were and Nate Silver responded. https://twitter.com/NateSilver538/status/1315296563212832768 [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.228|108.162.216.228]] 12:25, 12 October 2020 (UTC)

People who have been declared stupid have no obligation to react sensibly.
People feel no obligation to try to educate stupid people.
But declaring oneself to be on the clever side feels so good.
--[[Special:Contributions/162.158.92.194|162.158.92.194]] 11:14, 12 October 2020 (UTC)

The title text implies that you are discussing with a dishonest person ("you have to consider the probability of them paying up"). So I think this comic is about people who purposely distort facts and claim that the opponent are confused. A red herring. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.105.244|141.101.105.244]] 11:22, 12 October 2020 (UTC)

:Rather, it's just saying again more about how you need to factor in probability into things correctly, and in general an idiot like this isn't trustworthy. It's not about them being dishonest about whether they are misunderstanding probability though. It does raise the question though about what the terms of the bet are so that it would be advantageous for you, and how to consider that they are basing their predictions of what will happen on a simplification and misunderstanding of predictions that you give them yourself, and they'd thus be reluctant to bet with you when they think you just said which way it is going to happen, and thus any such bet you make with them afterwards, they'd either think the way you want to bet is guaranteed for you to win, or it wouldn't make sense as you would be trying to bet the way you said wouldn't happen, which would likely make them think you are being dishonest somewhere, unless they are even more crazy and stupid than shown here. At best you would bet on something you convinced them is 50/50 with you taking the more likely side of the bet.--[[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.245|162.158.74.245]] 11:10, 14 October 2020 (UTC)

2371: Election Screen Time

2020-10-13T14:55:21Z

141.101.98.52: /* Explanation */ Because there's several viable scenarios

{{comic
| number = 2371
| date = October 12, 2020
| title = Election Screen Time
| image = election_screen_time.png
| titletext = Feels like I picked a bad year to try to start having a healthy relationship with political news.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by A SCREEN TIME REPORT. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

Cueball has an app on his phone which informs him of the time spent using it for various purposes. These are typically used to monitor one's own, or maybe one's teenage child's, (over)use of games, social media apps, general browsers, etc and highlight any surprising issues. It is unclear whether this is a specific targetted product that heuristically identifies a narrow subset of uses, it is more typically general app whose current configuration is to filter down to just two rather specific politics-related interactions or he actually does nothing more ''but'' these two recognisable tasks on this particular device.

Whichever is the case, it is currently displaying and comparing just two curiously detailed statistics - the time used staying informed about politics, the time he has spent reading election updates - and nothing else. The comic reflects that most people spend a lot of time consuming news speculating about who will win the upcoming election, even though reading these "updates" will have no impact on the election because people are unlikely to change their minds because of them. People spend very little time researching information that will allow them to make informed decisions about voting, which is an important civic duty. In addition, a recent article in the Atlantic says that "[https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2020/10/reading-too-much-political-news-bad-happiness/616651/ Reading Too Much Political News Is Bad for Your Well-Being]".

The title text suggests regret about the time spent consuming political news, possibly reflecting the sentiment that the {{w|2020 United States presidential election}} has been especially divisive with little productive dialogue.

Randall has previously remarked on poor time allocation in [[1445: Efficiency]], in which he admits that he reduces his overall efficiency by spending too much time figuring out which approach to a problem was more efficient.

==Transcript==

[Cueball is looking at his phone screen time report. The screen appears above his head]

Screen Time Report
:Staying informed about politics like a good civic-minded person
:.. 26m
 
:Reading election updates that won't affect your actions in any way but slightly improve your knowledge about what's going to happen in a few weeks
:................................................. 9h14m

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Elections]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Phones]]

Talk:2369: All-in-One

2020-10-08T00:21:31Z

141.101.98.52:

Is the title text a reference the Librareome project in Rainbow's End (Vernor Vinge)?

See, e.g., [http://www.technovelgy.com/ct/content.asp?Bnum=1856]

--[[Special:Contributions/162.158.79.124|162.158.79.124]] 18:06, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

I wonder if Randall took inspiration from [this Dilbert](https://dilbert.com/strip/1994-04-25). [[User:Moosenonny10|Moosenonny10]] ([[User talk:Moosenonny10|talk]]) 18:52, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

I don't think "eat" and "corrugate" are intended as malfunctions. People sometimes eat paper -- it's a common trope in spy parodies where someone will eat a document to prevent someone from getting access to it. And corrugate just sounds like it's making corrugated cardboard from the input paper. [[User:Barmar|Barmar]] ([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 19:22, 7 October 2020 (UTC)
:I changed it. What do you think? ''welp, i'' [[User:Donthaveusername|Donthaveusername]] ([[User talk:Donthaveusername|talk]]) 19:37, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

Seems like plagiarize would be somehow related to scan and copy.
: I imagine the internal sub-functions would be: Scan (or read from prepocessed page data from an original document 'sent to printer'), OCR (as necessary - implied in Translate but not mentioned as a function, despite being an actually popular 'one touch' function with appropriate desktop software involved), Comprehend (natural-language processing), De-Source (remove references that indicate the true source, including headers, watermarks, logos), Re-Arrange (optional shuffling/re-wording in places, maybe even synonyms), Re-Source (personalise back up again, for the plagiarist's benefit), then Print (if scan-for-copy/printed) or Save (if scan-for-storage, maybe even 'print'-to-storage via the device). [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 00:21, 8 October 2020 (UTC)

shred and scan (or scanf) are also unix and C functions. Shred overwrites a file on disk, deleting it and preventing any subsequent recovery of the lost data. scan reads input according to a format string. Should one take a standard file and scan a string per the format '%s', the program will read in the variable until an end-of-line character is encountered. If the file were shredded first, resulting in a random set of bits, this end of line character might never be read. This seems to be more of a memory problem than a CPU problem, thus might not be the full explanation of the alt-text. --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.126.126|162.158.126.126]] 21:10, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

The incomplete template mentions that there might be a reason for Randall making this topic, but I don't think there is other than just making a funny joke. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.34.146|172.69.34.146]] 22:42, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

What, it can fold but not spindle or mutilate? :( [[Special:Contributions/162.158.75.114|162.158.75.114]] 23:14, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

Is staple removal a real printer feature? [[User:BunsenH|BunsenH]] ([[User talk:BunsenH|talk]]) 23:17, 7 October 2020 (UTC)
:Doubt it. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.132.243|172.68.132.243]] 23:39, 7 October 2020 (UTC)
::Staple-detection is (fairly) trivial, but consistently extracting them 'nicely' while preserving the paper as much as possible might be beyond a device (it's tricky enough for a person, sometimes). [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.211|141.101.99.211]] 23:51, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

I'm disappointed there's no "jam for no particular reason in the most difficult place to access" option. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.184|108.162.216.184]] 23:18, 7 October 2020 (UTC)
: I thought there should be Paper Cranes in the right-hand column... But your suggestion is also an obvious omission. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.211|141.101.99.211]] 23:51, 7 October 2020 (UTC)

Talk:2365: Messaging Systems

2020-09-30T16:04:08Z

141.101.98.52:

I guess ordinary email should be in the same section as SMS as well. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.158.171|162.158.158.171]] 00:20, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

The comic should mention MMS, which is well integrated into SMS, so that it's supported by not quite as much as SMS but still by almost everybody, and counts as vaguely modern in that you can attach images and have no length limit. ―[[User:TobyBartels|TobyBartels]] ([[User talk:TobyBartels|talk]]) 00:46, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

My DynaTAC doesn't get SMS. --[[Special:Contributions/172.69.22.150|172.69.22.150]] 00:56, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

Okay, got a basic explanation up; The comic is missing a bunch of different messaging services I feel. Also, I knew that somebody would say that their phone doesn't support SMS, I guess that habit of hedging writing with mostly is paying off.
[[Special:Contributions/172.69.63.143|172.69.63.143]] 01:01, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

"It [Whatsapp] is popular in multiple countries, namely Latin America and India." I have no idea what this means: should "namely" be "mainly"? But is the fixed version even true? [[Special:Contributions/162.158.158.225|162.158.158.225]] 11:28, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
: Both "namely" and "mainly" are valid and mean very similar things in this context. Saying "... mainly Latin America and India" suggests most of Whatsapp's popularity is in Latin America and India and Whatsapp has little popularity anywhere else. On the other hand, saying "... namely Latin America and India" suggests that Latin America and India are some of the countries where Whatsapp is particularly popular without implying that Whatsapp is significantly unpopular elsewhere. That said, it's a pretty subtle distinction that almost no one will actually care about except hardcore language geeks. With love from your friendly neighborhood Grammar Communist. <3 [[User:Gertuviti|Gertuviti]] ([[User talk:Gertuviti|talk]]) 12:57, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
:: In any case: Wouldn't it be easier to list countries where it's not popular? Because to what I know there are a few markets where it didn't get a foothold (''namely'' Northern America, Australia, China), but in most of the rest of the world it basically is ''the'' way of messaging since many years (others, like Signal, Telegram, Threema, are coming, but usually have a hard time fighting WhatsApp predominancy). SMS didn't disappear and is still used by some technical systems (like for sending TANs or alarms), but I can't remember when I last heard about someone sending an SMS privately (my current phone, in service since one year, for sure never received one). --[[User:YMS|YMS]] ([[User talk:YMS|talk]]) 14:17, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
::: FIFY by avoiding both terms, & by adding the missing "in." Your friendly & useful Grammar democratic republican.
:::: This Grammar socialist-conservative thinks "in multiple countries, especially India & in Latin America" has other issues. I appreciate the need for "countries, especially (...) in Latin America" to be integrated with "countries, especially India (...)", but the mix of the multiple and singular examples as equivalent list-subitems jars. The "Set of (Item, Set of (Items))" thing is a complex linguistic construct. Perhaps "in multiple regions, especially India and Latin America" works better (both qualify as regions, or contain more implicitly relevent sub-regions if you prefer that interpretation, without worrying about precise country-level boundries). This also switches the ampersand out (incongruous eyesore, an unnecessary ''abbr.'' that clashes with the "in; and, particularly if used as the reordered "in Latin America & India", would actually imply stronger linking than merely being two examples plucked from a clearly unexhausted larger list). But I leave this suggestion here only for consideration. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 16:04, 30 September 2020 (UTC)

Discord is slowly moving towards supported by everyone because of Covid-19. [[User:Stardragon|Stardragon]] ([[User talk:Stardragon|talk]]) 12:27, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

"Discord being used by everyone" (ref. Explanation rather than above Talk comment), I have deliberately kept off Discord, so clearly not. The reason for Discord (as per Talk comment) applies more so to Zoom/Teams, though. Although I've kept off those too, where I can (using Zoom on a Raspberry Pi on a few occasions, which tends to overheat it). [[Special:Contributions/162.158.159.140|162.158.159.140]] 13:45, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
: Good for you; you're fighting the system! Note that the explanation has been updated from "everyone" to "many groups". [[User:OhFFS|OhFFS]] ([[User talk:OhFFS|talk]]) 18:02, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

Separate comment: I'm not sure if this helps or hinders the comic's assertions, but friends and family continually tend to send Texts to my dumb-phone that contain emoji I keep telling them that it can't show (i.e. any of them). Only by context can I guess if the anonymous 'square' character is more thumbs-up/smiley-face or otherwise. Or if the three squares after the birthday greeting might include candles/cake. Making them no more clarified than the plain-text message they think they're clarifying. I suppose the single, sole 'emojibox' reply ''does'' work as a basic read-receipt notification, though. Regardless of if it's actually winky-face, poo, zombie, rainbow, cablecar, flag-of-Liberia or whatever they decided to send me... ;) [[Special:Contributions/162.158.159.140|162.158.159.140]] 13:45, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
:That's one reason why SMS isn't in the "Vaguely Modern" category. Although it can transmit and receive emojis, many devices that only support SMS can't display them. [[User:Barmar|Barmar]] ([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 14:28, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

Why isn't there a category for Venn Diagrams? [[User:Barmar|Barmar]] ([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 18:58, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
:Uh, yes there is... — [[User:Sqrt-1|The 𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭]] [[User talk:Sqrt-1|talk]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|stalk]] 11:31, 30 September 2020 (UTC)

Aww, Telegram didn't even get mentioned, despite having 200 times as many users as Signal. :( [[User:Fabian42|Fabian42]] ([[User talk:Fabian42|talk]]) 21:26, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

I for one would support using Randall's local-mobile-TID-gateway protocol [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.157|173.245.52.157]] 22:41, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

: Whatsapp is also used as main service in most of the European Union, to the point even everybody with iPhones or access to iMessage is using it as main protocol, and most youngsters have a habit of using it for everything instead of Email (then wondering why pictures and videos got degraded). Maybe this should be mentioned.

1982: Evangelism

2018-04-19T06:04:30Z

141.101.98.52: Inserted an missed 'banana'

{{comic
| number = 1982
| date = April 18, 2018
| title = Evangelism
| image = evangelism.png
| titletext = The wars between the "OTHER PRIMATES OPEN THEM FROM THE SMALL END" faction versus the "BUT THE LITTLE BIT OF BANANA AT THE SMALL END IS GROSS" faction consumed Europe for generations.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a 2 METER FARENHEIT LOVER - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

Evangelism is defined as a zealous advocacy for a cause. This comic presents a line plot where causes are listed in order from advocates who are least intense to most intense going left to right.

;''Religious proselytizers''
Religious proselytizers are, of the groups on this list, most known for intense evangelism in popular culture, yet Randall contrasts them in this strip with four other groups which he finds to be even more intense in their evangelism.

;''People who want the US to switch to metric'' and ''People who want the US to switch to metric but keep Fahrenheit''
Unlike most of the world, the US uses [[wikipedia:United States Customary Units|US customary units]] instead of metric units. Some people wish for this to change.

Pro-metric people who wish to keep the {{w|Fahrenheit}} scale rather than change to {{w|Celsius}} are ranked as slightly more evangelic. A common argument for keeping the Fahrenheit scale is due to 0°F equating to "really cold" and 100°F to "really hot" when talking about weather.

;''People who threw away their socks and bought all one kind''
This is also mentioned in the [[1572:_xkcd_Survey|xkcd Survey]] from September 2015 which included this question:

<blockquote>
Have you ever thrown out all your different pairs of socks/underwear, bought a bunch of replacements that were all one kind, and then told all your friends how great it was and how they should do it too?
</blockquote>

;''People who open bananas from the other end''
Some people prefer to open bananas from the bottom (small end) instead of the top (stem end). This is the way primates in the wild have been observed to open bananas. Less force is required to open a banana at the bottom than at the stem, causing less bruising of the fruit & generally making it easier to open. However, if not done carefully, this can result in the fruit getting squished and making a mess on the person's fingers. Opening bananas from the stem end offers no practical advantage, yet appears to be the predominant habit of most banana-eating humans in Randall's sample. One explanation is that opening using the stem as a lever makes for greater ease of opening and thus less damage in practice. (Bananas grow with the stem at the bottom: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Banana_farm_Chinawal.jpg Banana farm Chinawal.jpg])

The title text is a fictional argument that apparently somehow tore apart Europe. It is about how bananas are supposed to be opened, so it is absurd for this to have actually happened. The supposed argument ''stems''[ [[No Pun Intended|Pun Intended]] ] from a disagreement over the suggested ease of opening a banana from the bottom, versus the idea that the small bit at the base of a banana is unappetizing. This also appears to be a reference to the wars between the Blefuscudians who opened their eggs at the big end, and the Lilliputians who broke their eggs at the small end, as documented in Jonathan Swift's epic novel Gulliver's Travels.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[A single frame is shown. The header reads:]
:People by intensity of evangelism
:[An arrow points from left to right. The text above:]
:More intense

:[A line is drawn from left to right with five markers on it.]
:[Marker on the left:]
:Religious proselytizers
:[Marker in the middle:]
:People who want the US to switch to metric
:[Marker slightly right of the middle:]
:People who want the US to switch to metric but keep Fahrenheit
:[Marker at the beginning of the last quarter:]
:People who threw away their socks and bought all one kind
:[Marker at the right:]
:People who open bananas from the other end

{{comic discussion}}

1957: 2018 CVE List

2018-02-19T10:59:13Z

141.101.98.52: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1957
| date = February 19, 2018
| title = 2018 CVE List
| image = 2018_cve_list.png
| titletext = CVE-2018-?????: It turns out Bruce Schneier is just two mischevious kids in a trenchcoat.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by HACKING THIS WIKI VIA THE EDIT BOX - The explanation looks like a list. Explain the comic and put the security vulnerabilities in a table. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{|class="wikitable"
!Security vulnerability
!Notes
|-
|Apple products crash when displaying certain Telugu or Bengali letter combinations.
|This refers to a real vulnerability in iOS and MacOS publicized a few days before the comic released <ref>https://techcrunch.com/2018/02/15/iphone-text-bomb-ios-mac-crash-apple/</ref>.
|-
|An attacker can use a timing attack to extploit[sic] a race condition in garbage collection to extract a limited number of bits from the Wikipedia article on Claude Shannon.
|Timing Attack to exploit a race condition in garbage collection refers to Meltdown and Spectre CPU flaws that can be exploited in cloud server like the ones in Wikipedia
|-
|At the cafe on third street, the post-it note with the wifi password is visible from the sidewalk.
|Writing passwords in a visible place is a major security flaw. For instance, following the [[wikipedia:2018 Hawaii false missile alert|2018 Hawaii false missile alert]] the agency received criticism for a press photo showing a password written on a sticky note attached to a monitor.<ref>http://uk.businessinsider.com/hawaii-emergency-agency-password-discovered-in-photo-sparks-security-criticism-2018-1?r=US&IR=T</ref> However, if a cafe posts their wifi password for customers then having it visible through the window as well presents a very minor reduction in security.
|-
|A remote attacker can inject arbitrary text into public-facing pages via the comments box.
|Describes a common feature on news sites or social media sites like Facebook. The possibility for users to "inject" text into the page is by design. This is a humorous reference to the relatively common security vulnerability "[[Wikipedia:Cross-site_scripting|persistent cross-site scripting]]", where input provided by the user is displayed to other users in a dangerous fashion that allows attackers to inject arbitrary HTML or Javascript code into e.g. a comment section. It might also be a humorous reference to the events before, during and after the 2016 US Presidential elections where Internet Research Agency employees based remotely in St. Petersburg, Russia, but disguised as US citizens, "injected" arbitrary text in the form of political propaganda into comments on multiple web sites, according to an indictment returned by a federal grand jury on February 16, 2018.
|-
|MySQL server 55.45 secretly runs two parallel databases for people who say "S-Q-L" and "sequel."
|Some people pronounce "SQL" like "sequel", after SQL's predecessor "SEQUEL (Structured English Query Language)". MySQL is an open-source relational database management system, the latest GA version (at the time of writing) is MySQL 5.7.
|-
|A flaw in some x86 CPUs could allow a root user to de-escalate to normal account privileges.
|This vulnerability refers to DOM0 attacks on Virtualization CPUs, regulary escalate from normal(few privileges) to root (full privileges), this is the inverse.
|-
|Apple products catch fire when displaying emoji with diacritics.
|Diacritics are the accents found on letters in some languages (eg. č, ģ ķ, ļ, ņ, š, ž). These would not be found on emojis.
|-
|An oversight in the rules allows a dog to join a basketball team.
|This likely refers to the movie Air Bud. It's a movie about a dog playing basketball {{w|Air Bud}}. This has been a common theme in xkcd comics, see [[115: Meerkat]], [[1439: Rack Unit]], [[1819: Sweet 16]], [[1552: Rulebook]]
|-
|Haskell isn't side-effect-free after all; the effects are all just concentrated in this one. Computer in Missouri that no one's checked on in a while.
|Haskell is a functional programming language, functional programming is characterized by using functions that dont have side effects in other parts of the program.
|-
|Nobody really knows how hypervisors work.
|Virtualization programing is hard, Meltdown and Specter are related to this
|-
|CRITICAL: Under Linux 3.14.8 on System/390 in a UTC+14 time zone, a local user could potentially use a buffer overflow to change another user's default system clock from 12-hour to 24-hour.
|Jokes about arcane systems that are running linux, that have bugs that nobody can replicate because there are no more machines on this type where reproduce the bug to fix it.
|-
|x86 has way too many instructions.
|This is a joke account for random acronyms of processor assembled language many of them are overspecialized version of general ones
|-
|Numpy 1.8.0 can factor primes in O(log n) time and must be quietly deprecated before anyone notices.
|NumPy is the fundamental package for scientific computing with Python. If something can find the prime factors of a number this quickly, there are attacks to break many crypto functions used in internet security. However, prime numbers have only a single factor, and "factoring primes" quickly is a simpler problem.
|-
|Apple products grant remote access if you send them words that break the "I before E" rule.
|another joke on the first CVE and a common english writing rule.
|-
|Skylake x86 chips can be pried from their sockets using certain flathead screwdrivers.
|Skylake x86 chips are a line of microprocessors, yes, you can remove forcefully any processor from his socket with a screwdriver, there are many reports from people not using common sense.
|-
|Apparently Linus Torvalds can be bribed pretty easily.
|Linux Torvals is the benevolent dictator of the Linux kernel codebase, normally it is hard to pass a change because he has the last word about what merge to the code base because that code is replicated in all linux installations, but apparently he is easy to bribe, that is a severe critical vulnerability to all linux server and machines
|-
|An attacker can execute malicious code on their own machine and no one can stop them.
|The point of an attack is to make someone else's machine perform actions against the owner's will. Anyone can make their own machine execute any code, but this would usually not be described as an attack.
|-
|Apple products execute any code printed over a photo of a dog with a saddle and a baby riding it.
|This could refer to a CVE vulnerability of JPG files where javascript is executed by some application, only this time is in a printed photo instead of a file .
|-
|Under rare circumstances, a flaw in some versions of Windows could allow Flash to be installed.
|This is another common CVE description, Flash was discontinued because is abismal security record. All security experts advise against install.
|-
|Turns out the cloud is just other people's computers.
|This refers to a computer meme where replace "cloud" with "other people's computers" must be used in all marketing presentation to CEOs and not computer literate persons to evaluate the security impact of using "Cloud services"
|-
|A flaw in Mitre's CVE database allows arbitrary code insertion.[~~CLICK HERE FOR CHEAP VIAGRA~~]
|Mitre's CVE database is the database where all CVE are listed, this is a joke between the 4th CVE in this list pointing that the site is also vulnerable
|-
|It turns out Bruce Schneier is just two mischievous kids in a trenchcoat. (title text)
|Bruce Schneier is a conceptual fictional character, who is a security researcher. His work is produced by a loose collective of anonymous contributors.
|}

== References ==
<references/>

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

LEAKED LIST OF MAJOR 2018 SECURITY VULNERABILITIES

CVE-2018-????? Apple products crash when displaying certain Telugu or Bengali letter combinations.

CVE-2018-????? An attacker can use a timing attack to extploit[sic] a race condition in garbage collection to extract a limited number of bits from the Wikipedia article on Claude Shannon.

CVE-2018-????? At the cafe on third street, the post-it note with the wifi password is visible from the sidewalk.

CVE-2018-????? A remote attacker can inject arbitrary text into public-facing pages via the comments box.

CVE-2018-????? MySQL server 55.45 secretly runs two parallel databases for people who say "S-Q-L" and "sequel."

CVE-2018-????? A flaw in some x86 CPUs could allow a root user to de-escalate to normal account privileges.

CVE-2018-????? Apple products catch fire when displaying emoji with diacritics.

CVE-2018-????? An oversight in the rules allows a dog to join a basketball team.

CUE-2018-????? Haskell isn't side-effect-free after all; the effects are all just concentrated in this one. Computer in Missouri that no one's checked on in a while.

CVE-2018-????? Nobody really knows how hypervisors work.

CVE-2018-????? CRITICAL: Under Linux 3.14.8 on System/390 in a UTC+14 time zone, a local user could potentially use a buffer overflow to change another user's default system clock from 12-hour to 24-hour.

CVE-2018-????? x86 has way too many instructions.

CVE-2018-????? Numpy 1.8.0 can factor primes in O(log n) time and must be quietly deprecated before anyone notices.

CVE-2018-????? Apple products grant remote access if you send them words that break the "I before E" rule.

CVE-2018-????? Skylake x86 chips can be pried from their sockets using certain flathead screwdrivers.

CVE-2018-????? Apparently Linus Torvalds can be bribed pretty easily.

CVE-2018-????? An attacker can execute malicious code on their own machine and no one can stop them.

CVE-2018-????? Apple products execute any code printed over a photo of a dog with a saddle and a baby riding it.

CVE-2018-????? Under rare circumstances, a flaw in some versions of Windows could allow Flash to be installed.

CVE-2018-????? Turns out the cloud is just other people's computers.

CVE-2018-????? A flaw in Mitre's CVE database allows arbitrary code insertion.[~~CLICK HERE FOR CHEAP VIAGRA~~]

{{comic discussion}}

1854: Refresh Types

2017-06-25T03:35:31Z

141.101.98.52: /* Hard refresh */

{{comic
| number = 1854
| date = June 23, 2017
| title = Refresh Types
| image = refresh_types.png
| titletext = The hardest refresh requires both a Mac keyboard and a Windows keyboard as a security measure, like how missile launch systems require two keys to be turned at once.
}}

==Explanation==
In this comic [[Randall]] presents five different levels of refresh operations for web applications. The first three (''soft refresh'', ''normal refresh'', and ''hard refresh'') are common operations to keep the content in the browser retrieved from the server up to date. The other two (''harder refresh'' and ''hardest refresh'') are fictional operations to perform ''refresh'' operations on remote resources. The terms are probably adopted from {{w|Reboot (computing)|soft}} and {{w|Hardware reset|hard reset}} operations used to restart broken computers or e.g. smartphones.

=== Soft refresh ===
''Soft refresh'' refers to an operation in a web page that requests new information without reloading the entire page. The given example, {{w|Gmail}}, includes a feature that allows users to poll new emails and show it in the inbox interface. It is a command using {{w|JavaScript}} and {{w|Ajax (programming)|Ajax}} to load new contents from the server in the background and only update necessary components of the page. Since modern web applications do this also automatically in short time intervals those buttons are mostly unnecessary. In Gmail a user will see a new message instantly.

=== Normal refresh ===
The ''normal refresh'' is a browser operation that reloads the complete web page, text and other content that has changed since the original load will be updated. The operation can be triggered by refresh buttons in browsers, though it also can be requested using the common keyboard commands as listed by Randall. Many pages -- like the main page at xkcd.com -- don't have a refresh button. If the page has been opened before a new comic release, pressing F5 afterwards causes reload and the new comic is shown.

=== Hard refresh ===
What Randall calls ''hard refresh'' is a less common browser operation forcing the browser to re-download every part of the webpage, ignoring any cached content. Caching is a common way of decreasing webpage load times. Browsers save resources such as images or {{w|Cascading Style Sheets|CSS stylesheets}} on the first visit on a webpage and use the local copy on subsequent visits. It allows them to decrease amount of transfer needed to show the webpage, but prevents showing changes made to the resources (for example a web developer changing the stylesheet). In those cases the ''hard refresh'' ensures that each part of the website is downloaded in its newest form.

If there is a {{w|Proxy server|Web-Proxy}} or a Cloud-Cache (like used for this wiki) in between the browser and the Web-Server this type of refreshing may not work. In this case, unless a purge link is available, the user has to wait until the cache entry is expired and a new request to the web server is done. A Web-developer may try to avoid this behaviour by including special meta-tags in the HTML header to suppress caching, but not all proxies or clouds follow these instructions.

=== Harder refresh ===
''Harder refresh'' is a joke that extends the existing naming scheme. The joke is that if a ''hard refresh'' resets the browser display and cache, a ''harder refresh'' should reset the source of the data by cycling power in the data center. Assuming no damage was done, this would reset the memory on the server, erasing any information that had not been written to disk, and setting the server to the state it was in at launch. This would cause considerable downtime, and would be unlikely to help the user at all.

In {{w|Orchestration (computing)|orchestrated}} environment it may indirectly cause some virtual machines in the {{w|Cloud computing|cloud}} to be rebooted and assigned to an other web server needing more workload. But a growing workload is caused by hundreds or thousands additional requests and not just a single key combination from one browser. And rebooting an actual physical server upon a web page request is not possible, unless there is a software or operating system bug that will cause exactly this.

The ''harder refresh'' uses six keys, including the non-standard '[https://askubuntu.com/questions/19558/what-are-the-meta-super-and-hyper-keys HYPER]' key, a feature of the {{w|Space cadet keyboard}}.

=== Hardest refresh ===
The fifth option, ''hardest refresh'', moves beyond resetting the source of the data and resets the entire internet back to {{w|ARPANET}}, an early military network which was a forerunner to the modern internet. The implications of this are not made clear, but it should be noted that it wouldn't help to fix any problems a user is experiencing in-browser, as {{w|HTTP}}, the protocol by which web pages are sent, was not developed until late 1990, the year ARPANET was decommissioned.

The ''hardest refresh'' shortcut uses fifteen keys, including non-standard ones such as Ø and ⏏. (The former is a key found on Norwegian and Danish keyboards, the latter is the "eject" key found on Mac keyboards and some laptops.) The shortcut makes amusing comparisons about a shortcut that includes not only the F5 function key, but also the keys for the letter "F" and the digit "5", as well as the similarity in appearance between O, 0, and Ø.

The title text suggests that the inclusion of both the {{w|Windows key}} and {{w|Command key}} in the ''hardest refresh'' shortcut is a security measure akin to the {{w|Two-man rule}}, as it would require two keyboards to enter.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon. No table is the preferred version, just describe what's in the picture including the special keys.}}
:{| class=wikitable
! Refresh Type
! Example Shortcuts
! Effect
|-
| Soft Refresh
| Gmail REFRESH Button
| Requests update within JavaScript
|-
| Normal Refresh
| F5, CTRL-R, ⌘R
|Refreshes page
|-
|Hard Refresh
| CTRL-F5, CTRL-⇧, ⌘⇧R
| Refreshes page including cached files
|-
|Harder Refresh
| CTRL-⇧-HYPER-ESC-R-F5
| Remotely cycles power to datacenter
|-
|Hardest Refresh
| CTRL-⌘⊞⇧#-R-F5-F-5-ESC-O-0-Ø-⏏-SCROLL LOCK
| Internet starts over from ARPANET
|}

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Internet]]

1746: Making Friends

2017-04-09T22:28:06Z

141.101.98.52: citation added - they can attack live animals sometimes if they are very hungry

{{comic
| number = 1746
| date = October 14, 2016
| title = Making Friends
| image = making_friends.png
| titletext = "This seems more like a way to attract turkey vultures." "My mom always told me a turkey vulture is just a friend you haven't met yet, usually because you don't smell enough like decaying meat."
}}

==Explanation==

{{incomplete|More on real problems with making friends? More on Cueball's crazy plan? Any reference to someone actually capturing vultures like this (maybe even a real animal)?}}

[[Ponytail]] is complaining to [[Cueball]] that it is hard to make new friends once you are out of school. She even has problems just meeting new people, let alone making those new people her friends.

This is a common problem, or maybe rather an advantage of going to school. In school you are forced together with a group of people you have to see everyday and work together with in groups. This is a great catalyst for making new friends. In the early grades the kids haven't had time to form many friendships so they are ready to make new friends, and later in college the young people often move away from their home town, and thus have no friends in their new town, and are again ready to make friends. Later in life it is rare to be put in a similar situation, and the people you do meet might already have several friends; for most people there is usually a rather low limit on how many friends it is possible to keep close. Thus many feel it is hard to make new friends compared to when they went to school.

Cueball has a solution, but it is very weird. He says he pretends to be injured, and then, as if he were a weak animal on the {{w|savanna}}, he expects other people to begin circling around him, not directly to eat him, but to take his ''food, shelter and nutrients''. This is a weird formulation as {{w|nutrients}} is what you get from your food, so either he is referring twice to his food, or he actually refers to his value as nutrient (i.e. food) for another being. Also it is unlikely for a person to steal his shelter, unless this refers to his clothing, as "the shelter" would usually be seen as a normal person's house, which is rather hard to take {{Citation needed}}, especially if the person is renting and it belongs to someone else.

He then talks about these possible future friends as if they will descend on him, making it sound even more like they are birds hanging above him like {{w|vultures}}. But his plan is to start telling these people who are ready to rob him of his life support cool facts about {{w|Outer space|space}} before they get a chance to descend, and then make them like him based on this knowledge. And then before they know what hit them, they are instantly his friends. If this were actually about vultures, his method could be used to trap said vultures, a trick that might be used to try and capture vultures by tricking them to come down in order to eat them yourself (if stuck in a desert, etc).

Cueball seems to think this is a fantastic idea, as shown by his arm gestures. But Ponytail seems to think otherwise. Her comment ''this explains a lot'' is probably a reference to other strange habits of Cueball that she has observed. Or his lack of other friends. Or there was a story about how they met that had confused her until this conversation occurred...

In the title text Ponytail mentions that what Cueball has just described fits well with the behavior of {{w|turkey vultures}} rather than humans. Turkey vultures are a type of bird of prey which feeds on carrion. They are known to identify and circle weak, injured, dead or dying animals so they can eat them (take their nutrients).

As they are animals they would not care about cool facts about space, but Cueball did seem to talk about other humans in the main comic. The title text, however, goes even further out this line and have Cueball cite his mom: "My mom always told me a turkey vulture is just a friend you haven't met yet, usually because you don't smell enough like decaying meat." This is a reference to the old saying: "A stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet", and the action of the vultures eating dead animals.

Smelling of decaying meat would be likely to attract the vultures but it should be noted that this is likely to drive away most other potential (human) friends, as most people don't like the smell of decaying meat. {{Citation needed}} Also, there is very little reason to believe that you could become friends with vultures , although if you get up and show that you are not really injured, they are likely to give up and fly away rather than attack you, [https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn11970-starving-vultures-switch-to-live-prey/ unless they are starving].

Vultures hanging in the air over prey that is about to die, was also the subject of [[926: Time Vulture]]. Saying cool things about space, hoping that people like you, was the subject of [[1644: Stargazing]]. The comic [[1485: Friendship]], was not about friendship...

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is walking with Ponytail holding her arms out while talking.]
:Ponytail: Making friends is so much harder once you're out of school.
:Ponytail: Everyone's so busy. And how do you even ''meet'' people?

:[In this frame-less panel Cueball raises his arms in front of his chest while they walk on.]
:Cueball: Here's what I do:
:Cueball: I pretend to be weak and injured, and wait for others to start circling, hoping to take my food, shelter, and nutrients.

:[Cueball stop walking and lifts both arms straight out as Ponytail turns towards him.]
:Cueball: Then, before they can descend, I start telling them cool facts about space until they like me.
:Cueball: ''Bam'', friendship!
:Ponytail: This explains a lot.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Space]]

Talk:1792: Bird/Plane/Superman

2017-02-01T06:35:34Z

141.101.98.52:

The explanation says that "birds evolved from dinosaurs". But birds **are** dinosaurs --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.54.100|172.68.54.100]] 05:40, 31 January 2017 (UTC)

;Sunbathing
Randall missed that a plane can lose it's ability to fly via excessive icing on surfaces. While it is not usually the way in which it is cured (using deicing solution and onboard aircraft systems to melt them,) sunbathing the plane in greater than freezing temperatures is an excellent way to regain the ability to fly. (And without additional energy cost, too!) [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.34|108.162.216.34]] 17:58, 30 January 2017 (UTC)

Now that we have solar planes, some planes may occasionally require a sunbath to get airborne again. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.114.88|162.158.114.88]] 21:51, 30 January 2017 (UTC)

;Flapping
Perhaps we should mention the pre-twentieth century attempts at powered flight some of which were powered by flapping.

Also should we mention that a hta craft pwered by flapping would be an ornithopter.

;Mating & Peeping David
Given their is only one David Attenborough and he does not spend his entire life making wildlife documentaries the chance of his observing any individual bird copulation is remarkably small.

[[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.137|141.101.99.137]] 19:28, 30 January 2017 (UTC)

What sort of birds mate in mid flight? --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.80.52|141.101.80.52]] 19:47, 30 January 2017 (UTC)
:Swifts for example. --[[User:DaB.|DaB.]] ([[User talk:DaB.|talk]]) 21:37, 30 January 2017 (UTC)

;mid flight poop
From what I understand, superman gets the majority of his energy from the sun. Is there any confirmation that he can poop mid flight, or even poop at all? Maybe he just slowly releases various gasses?--[[Special:Contributions/173.245.51.17|173.245.51.17]] 22:47, 30 January 2017 (UTC)

Well Superman does eat, so it is likely he does poop too. Sun gives him super power thing, but he frequents restaurants as Clark Kent. --[[User:Trimutius|Trimutius]] ([[User talk:Trimutius|talk]]) 04:00, 31 January 2017 (UTC)

Planes are definitely capable of releasing their poop intentionally. They choose not to. Truth Rating: Pants On Fire. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.76|108.162.219.76]] 14:47, 31 January 2017 (UTC)

I was under the impression that birds either do not have sphincters, or do but can't control them to hold their poop in. Would this not mean that birds should not be ticked, or am I completely wrong?[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]] 06:35, 1 February 2017 (UTC)

;punching
No need to go to ostriches or emus, swans can fly well, and certainly take a punch, though i would *strongly* recommend against trying. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swan#/media/File:The_swan_attacks_man.Hokkaido-toyako,%E4%BA%BA%E3%82%92%E8%A5%B2%E3%81%86%E6%B4%9E%E7%88%BA%E6%B9%96%E3%81%AE%E7%99%BD%E9%B3%A5P6200258%E3%83%A2%E3%82%B6%E3%82%A4%E3%82%AF.jpg]. Geese are also probably not much safer. --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.89.43|162.158.89.43]] 12:27, 31 January 2017 (UTC)

;Title text
I've never seen such a sticker with a spider web - unless on Helloween. But stickers depicting silhouettes of birds on the other hand: https://www.google.com/search?q=vogel+aufkleber&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjj64Xlv-zRAhXGtxQKHS3ABh0QsAQIgwE&biw=1920&bih=914 But it seems as if this is a regional (Germany - or maybe Europe) thing, since searching for "bird stickers" didn't yield such a clear result... [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 13:22, 31 January 2017 (UTC)

;Magnetic navigation
There is no evidence that Superman is not able to fly in Magnetic navigation mode... [[Special:Contributions/188.114.103.11|188.114.103.11]] 17:33, 31 January 2017 (UTC)

786: Exoplanets

2016-08-18T23:46:20Z

141.101.98.52: /* Explanation */ Almost certain fallout was not predicted to be massive, but actually quite small - and as there is no citation I have removed the word.

{{comic
| number = 786
| date = August 30, 2010
| title = Exoplanets
| image = exoplanets_2010.png
| titletext = I'm just worried that we'll all leave and you won't get to come along!
}}

==Explanation==
[[Beret Guy]] runs to wake up [[Cueball]] with his potentially middle of the night revelation that Humankind is discovering "{{w|exoplanet}}s" or planets that exist outside of our solar system. The indication is that these planets are habitable enough for humans, even if just for a visit.

Then Beret Guy takes it a bit further thinking that one of the countries on Earth could restart {{w|Project Orion (nuclear propulsion)|Project Orion}}. As Beret suggests, Project Orion was an early project to come up with a spacecraft that would ride the shockwave from a series of nuclear bombs it dropped in order to travel very, very fast. However, the one major downside of Project Orion was the fallout that the launching of any such craft would present on Earth. One could try to boost the Orion spacecraft into orbit with conventional rockets, but Orion spacecraft are heavy — being composed of giant pusher plates and rows upon rows of nuclear bombs, they are hard to lift. On top of this, the {{w|Nuclear Test Ban Treaty}} means that the craft would be flatly illegal to build and launch on Earth, no matter what you did. However, if an asteroid mining project were to be started, the Orion drive spacecraft, the nuclear bombs, and all the infrastructure needed to man, build, and crew it could all be built safely in space, well away from the Earth's fragile biosphere, where little harm could be done. Some commercial spaceflight programs are interested in starting asteroid mining in the future, even now For Example: http://www.planetaryresources.com.

In summary, Beret is very excited that we can see (with the Hubble telescope and other earth-bound telescopes) and find exoplanets. Then with some advances in space technology we can create nuclear propulsion in space to reach these planets, and it will all be happening quite possibly within a few decades. He is thus worried that Cueball will miss all of this ongoing excitement and be left behind!

Cueball would just rather snooze, as he is not impressed. Exoplanets have been discovered starting in 1996, but there are still only a few confirmed {{w|List of habitable planet candidates|planet candidates}} in the habitable zone at a distant star. This did change fast after that time since new ways of finding planets are created — see [[1071: Exoplanets]], which was posted with the same title. At that point, there were exactly 786 Exoplanets confirmed — the number of this comic.

==Transcript==
:[Beret Guy runs into the room, someone is in bed under the covers.]
:Beret guy: Wake up! Wake up!
:Cueball: What is it?
:[Beret Guy stands talking to Cueball still hiding under covers.]
:Beret guy: We're alive during the time when they're first discovering other planetary systems! They're finding them as fast as they can build new instruments to look for them!
:[Dramatic shot of just Beret Guy.]
:Beret Guy: And if one of Earth's cultures advances its space program enough to start enriching uranium on asteroids, we'll lose the main barrier to restarting Project Orion and building nuke-riding City-ships!
:[Beret Guy bends down to eye level with Cueball in bed, who is peaking his face out from the covers.]
:Beret Guy: The only known technology capable of fast interstellar travel could be operational within just a few generations, and we're discovering all these destinations to pick from! Come ''on!''
:Cueball: Can I hit "snooze"?
:Beret Guy: Okay, but ''just once!''

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Exoplanets]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Exoplanets01]]

1640: Super Bowl Context

2016-06-03T22:01:31Z

141.101.98.52: /* Explanation */ pun?

{{comic
| number = 1640
| date = February 8, 2016
| title = Super Bowl Context
| image = super_bowl_context.png
| titletext = Why did the chicken cross the road? It begins over five thousand years ago with the domestication of the red junglefowl in southeast Asia and the development of paved roads in the Sumerian city of Ur.
}}

==Explanation==

[[White Hat]] tries to make normal conversation with [[Cueball]] about yesterday's {{w|American football}} game, {{w|Super Bowl 50}}.

When asking Cueball if he watched the game, Cueball begins with a simple ''Yes'', but then continues to add the contextual fact that about a third of the US population watched the event, which is an incredibly high percentage in today's [http://dictionary.reverso.net/english-definition/media%20landscape media landscape]. And according to Cueball this [http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/tv-ratings-super-bowl-50-862888 fraction is increasing], despite [http://moneyterms.co.uk/media-fragmentation/ media fragmentation]. Thus, even though there are today more and more different ways to watch news, sports and other entertainment, the Super Bowl continues to gain more viewers every year.

It turns out that Cueball has a problem. He cannot just reply to a simple question without trying to put the conversation into some kind of {{w|Context (language use)|context}} which does not necessarily have anything to do with the question asked, or at least not with the expected answer. From White Hat's reply it is obvious that he has had conversations like this with Cueball before, as he asks if they could ''just talk without your weird need to give context for everything?''

Cueball feels the need to disseminate any information he finds interesting, even in trivial conversation. Normally people like to have context-free conversations and White Hat invites Cueball to try to fit in with normal people's conversational style.

Cueball apologizes and agrees to try, but even though he really tries hard, with White Hat encouraging him to just reply normally to a question about the [http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2016/02/01/report-peyton-manning-has-told-close-friends-hell-retire/ rumored retirement] of {{w|Peyton Manning}}, he cannot stop himself from including context in his reply again. White Hat probably wanted Cueball to join in such minimal-context speculation. But, failing miserably again, White Hat finally gives up, and suggests they should try another conversation in a year, when Cueball might have learned to talk about the Super Bowl without context (hence the title).

This time he goes off on a tangent about Peyton as a {{w|mammal}}, and then adding the process of {{w|aging}} and mentioning two reasons for this (which are not well understood). The first he mentions is {{w|Ageing#Damage-related factors|accumulation of damage}}, which includes {{w|mutations}} that can lead to diseases such as {{w|cancer}}. The other process he mentions is {{w|Ageing#Programmed_factors|timed factors}} which includes {{w|Telomeres}}. These have been linked to {{w|senescence|biological aging}} because of the shortening of telomeres at each {{w|Cell cycle|cell division}}; when telomeres become too short, the cells die (and so do mammals).

To cap it off, he mentions that {{w|retiring}} is a recent concept. But this only makes sense when compared to how long there have been mammals, not compared to how long there have been sports and games, where people could be too old, and thus need to retire long before they would die from old age. Before humans began to enjoy things for fun, the concept of retiring made no sense. You worked/fought for a living, until you got too old and died.

Cueball in this comic may represent [[Randall]], as much of {{xkcd}} is spawned from, or occasionally poking fun at, his own hyper-analytical tendencies. And it is also common knowledge that Randall is not very interested in sport, though there are several xkcd [[:Category:American football|comics about American football]]. The year before this one he made another comic in relation to the final, and in this comic, [[1480: Super Bowl]], he even mentions the fact that he does not know much about [[:Category:Sport|sports in general]]. So this is the second year in a row a comic has been released in conjunction with the Super Bowl final. But before 2015, there has only been one other comic like this, which was in 2006 with [[60: Super Bowl]].

The title text continues the joke with Cueball replying to the old {{w|anti-humor}} joke: "{{w|Why did the chicken cross the road?}}" Cueball replies with a preposterous amount of information instead of the cliched simplistic answer: "To get to the other side."

Cueball begins with the origin of {{w|chickens}}. They are believed to be descendants from domestication of the {{w|Red junglefowl}}, which occurred at least five thousand years ago in Asia, as Cueball correctly explains. Before there were chickens, there could not be one crossing a road. It also couldn't be called "crossing the road" without a {{w|Road surface|pavement}}. The {{w|History_of_road_transport#Wheeled_transport|first development of paved roads}} was in the city of {{w|Ur}} in the ancient {{w|Sumer|Sumerian}} civilization about 4000 BC (6000 years ago) (also partly explained in Cueball's reply).

As a trivial note, this comic is a rare instance of White Hat not being the fall guy for the joke. But already in his next discussion with Cueball ([[1657: Insanity]]) he was again the butt of the joke.

==Transcript==
:[White Hat and Cueball are walking together.]
:White Hat: Did you watch the Super Bowl?
:Cueball: Yes, like a third of the country.
:Cueball: A fraction that is steadily ''increasing'' despite media fragmentation.

:[White Hat stops and Cueball turn towards him.]
:White Hat: Can't we just talk without your weird need to give context for everything?
:Cueball: Sorry. I'll try.

:[As White Hat asks Cueball another question Cueball bunches his hands into fists. He is clearly struggling.]
:White Hat: Sounds like Peyton Manning's probably going to retire.
:Cueball: Yes, I... ...It...
:White Hat: C'mon, you can do it...
:Cueball: He...

:[Cueball spreads out his arms a little as he replies with two long sentences, while White Hat walks away from him.]
:Cueball: ''—Mammals like Peyton age via a process that involves both the accumulation of damage and poorly-understood timed factors.''
:Cueball: ''Yet the concept of retirement itself is surprisingly recent...''
:White Hat: Okay, good try. Maybe next year.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:American football]]
[[Category:Animals]]

Talk:1403: Thesis Defense

2014-08-04T13:46:15Z

141.101.98.52: My guess at the words

Sorry, but if your best defense is frightening counter attack a good offense will destroy you. The best defense is a good offense because a weakened or destroyed opponent can mount no offense.[[Special:Contributions/173.245.48.132|173.245.48.132]] 05:58, 4 August 2014 (UTC)BluDgeons

:Depends on type of counter attack. For example, the best defense against missiles is to fire anti-missile missiles, which may be seen as type of attack. Of course, the phrase is older than missiles, but I believe similar principles applied: not retaliation nor first strike, but attacking the enemy units which are trying to attack you. Alternatively, attacking enemy army supply lines may also force it to interrupt her attack on you. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:22, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

The expression is based on a concept that is military and ancient, but I wonder if the expression itself, in English, originated with American football, sometime since the game's birth in the 1860s. It is so specifically applicable to this game, where a team's defense and offense are completely separate units, run separately and spoken of separately and yet an extremely effective way to keep the opponent from scoring is to maintain possession of the ball while the game clock ticks down. [[User:Wrybred|Wrybred]] ([[User talk:Wrybred|talk]]) 13:18, 4 August 2014 (UTC)wrybred

May or may not also be inspired by Studio C: Thesis Defense
http://youtu.be/Lrlro3YJ15o
Teagan N {{unsigned ip|173.245.48.134}}

Can anyone make out what's written on the board? {{unsigned ip|141.101.105.220}}

My best guess after resizing the image a few times is
[The|To] [F|Falcons?] [at|of] [T|Times?]
[D|Displays?] [a|is|its] [M|Moods?]
[by?] {illegible first name (short maybe Meg)} {illegible surname (long)
[C|{illegible}] [the] {illegible 1 short word 1 long word or only 1 long word}
{illegible mid size word} {illegible short word maybe is} {illegible short word a} {illegible} {illegible} {{unsigned|Meerkat}}

Looks to me like "The Evolution of [Thesis/Turtle] Displays & Moods" something illegible, probably her name, followed by "Candidate for [illegible]" [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]]