explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

2212: Cell Phone Functions

2019-10-07T17:23:20Z

172.68.47.126: /* Transcript */ add categories

{{comic
| number = 2212
| date = October 7, 2019
| title = Cell Phone Functions
| image = cell_phone_functions.png
| titletext = ... tazer ... fire extinguisher ... bird feeder ... toilet paper ...
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by an xkcd phone. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic pokes fun at the ever-increasing function of smartphones and their users' reliance on them. It starts out sensible: Calling, browsing the Internet and taking pictures are the most prominent examples of tasks that many (if not most) people use a smartphone instead of a specific device for nowadays. The next two items, Newspaper and Flash Light, extend the Internet capabilities (either from within the mobile browser or as dedicated Apps) or repurpose the phone camera's flash and are commonplace as well. Some people even use their smartphone as the remote for their TV (either via RF wireless for smart TVs, or more universally via their phone's infrared port) or to pay in stores using payment providers like Google Play Wallet, Samsung Pay or Apple Pay, which utilize the NFC functionality of modern smartphones. A few high-end cars even support using a phone app instead of the key fob, rendering yet another item obsolete.

Then, the comic drifts off into the either not-yet-possible, or likely-never-possible spectrum (these items are also right of the "now" mark, meaning Randall has not switched to using a phone app for them): One cannot currently use a phone app as a dog leash, nor as an adhesive bandage. While using a phone as a steering wheel is possible (likely interfacing with the car's self-driving features), it would be a reversal of current initiatives to prevent drivers from using cell phones while driving. Things get increasingly odd, to the point where a smartphone is allegedly used as a toothbrush. Several items would require physical changes to the phone and not just repurposing existing capabilities, such as operating as a cheese grater, stapler or nail clipper. The Title text continues this path by implying Randall is soon expecting to clean his buttocks using a feature of his phone.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[A graph with time on the x axis and items Randall replaced with his smartphone on the y axis. For each item, the time he (allegedly) replaced it is marked; the marks form a jagged line down the graph, roughly sorted by when he switched. The regions are marked]
: I have a specific device for this
:[and]
: I just use my phone
: [items where the swich-over date is in the past:]
: Telephone
: Web Browser
: Camera
: Newspaper
: Flashlight
: TV Remote
: Credit Card
: Car Key
:[items where the switch-over date is in the future:]
: Dog Leash
: Steering Wheel
: Band-Aid
: Cheese Grater
: Stapler
: Nail Clipper
: Electric Drill
: Toothbrush

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Smartphones]]

1983: Clutter

2018-04-20T15:34:25Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1983
| date = April 20, 2018
| title = Clutter
| image = clutter.png
| titletext = I found a copy of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, but the idea of reading it didn't spark joy, so I gave it away.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by 1-800-GOT-JUNK - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
As the graph shows, the amount of junk sitting around his house is on an ever-increasing trend. Thus, it will continue to pile up and cause problems.

The title text refers to the book ''The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing'' by {{w|Marie Kondo}}. Ironically, he decides he doesn't have room for it and donates it.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[There is a panel containing a line graph. The x- and y-axes are labeled "time" and "amount of stuff in my house" respectively.]
:[The y-value generally increases as x increases. There are a few labeled exceptions where the y-value decreases slightly. From left to right:]
:"I need to clean up."
:"I've really let junk build up. Feels good to clear it out."
:"I hate moving, but at least it's a chance to finally get rid of all this excess stuff."
:"Ah, spring cleaning!"

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I'm starting to worry about my strategy for dealing with clutter.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Line graphs]]

1983: Clutter

2018-04-20T15:04:39Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */

1983: Clutter

2018-04-20T15:00:14Z

172.68.47.126:

1983: Clutter

2018-04-20T14:59:28Z

172.68.47.126:

1982: Evangelism

2018-04-18T15:43:13Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1982
| date = April 18, 2018
| title = Evangelism
| image = evangelism.png
| titletext = The wars between the "OTHER PRIMATES OPEN THEM FROM THE SMALL END" faction versus the "BUT THE LITTLE BIT OF BANANA AT THE SMALL END IS GROSS" faction consumed Europe for generations.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a ZEALOT - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
The title text is a fictional argument that apparently somehow tore apart Europe. It is about how bananas are supposed to be opened, so it is absurd for this to have actually happened.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[A single frame is shown. The header reads:]
:People by intensity of evangelism
:[An arrow points from left to right. The text above:]
:More intense

:[A line is drawn from left to right with five markers on it.]
:[Marker on the left:]
:Religious proselytizers
:[Marker in the middle:]
:People who want the US to switch to metric
:[Marker slightly right of the middle:]
:People who want the US to switch to metric but keep Fahrenheit
:[Marker at the beginning of the last quarter:]
:People who threw away their socks and bought all one kind
:[Marker at the right:]
:People who open bananas from the other end

{{comic discussion}}

1978: Congressional Testimony

2018-04-09T17:51:54Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1978
| date = April 9, 2018
| title = Congressional Testimony
| image = congressional_testimony.png
| titletext = James Cameron's Terminator 3 was the REALLY prophetic one. That's why Skynet sent a robot back to the 1990s to prevent him from ever making it, ultimately handing the franchise over to other directors.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created in the past by a TERMINATOR - Please change this comment in the future when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon or in the past.}}

[[Megan]] and [[Cueball]] are discussing Mark Zuckerberg's upcoming testimony.

Megan then starts talking about rewatching [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Terminator ''The Terminator''], a movie about a killer robot.

Cueball recalls that it was weird how the phone book turned into Skynet.

The title text makes the claim that Skynet, likely in fear of humans seeing it, had a robot time travel in order to stop the creation of Terminator 3.

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball sitting against a leafless tree; they are on opposite sides.]
:Megan: Mark Zuckerberg is testifying before congress this week.
:Cueball: Should be interesting.

:[Beat panel.]

:Megan: I recently re-watched ''Terminator''.
:Cueball: Yeah?

:Megan: It's weird that the thing that evolved into Skynet wasn't our nuclear launch systems '''''or''''' our humanoid robots.
:Megan: It was the phone book where the Terminator looked up Sarah Connor's address.
:Cueball: Funny how things turn out.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

1978: Congressional Testimony

2018-04-09T17:50:02Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1978
| date = April 9, 2018
| title = Congressional Testimony
| image = congressional_testimony.png
| titletext = James Cameron's Terminator 3 was the REALLY prophetic one. That's why Skynet sent a robot back to the 1990s to prevent him from ever making it, ultimately handing the franchise over to other directors.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created in the past by a TERMINATOR - Please change this comment in the future when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon or in the past.}}

[[Megan]] and [[Cueball]] are talking about Mark Zuckerberg's upcoming testimony.

Megan then starts talking about rewatching [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Terminator ''The Terminator''], a movie about a killer robot.

Cueball recalls that it was weird how the phone book turned into Skynet.

The title text makes the claim that Skynet, likely in fear of humans seeing it, had a robot time travel in order to stop the creation of Terminator 3.

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball sitting against a leafless tree; they are on opposite sides.]
:Megan: Mark Zuckerberg is testifying before congress this week.
:Cueball: Should be interesting.

:[Beat panel.]

:Megan: I recently re-watched ''Terminator''.
:Cueball: Yeah?

:Megan: It's weird that the thing that evolved into Skynet wasn't our nuclear launch systems '''''or''''' our humanoid robots.
:Megan: It was the phone book where the Terminator looked up Sarah Connor's address.
:Cueball: Funny how things turn out.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

1978: Congressional Testimony

2018-04-09T17:46:22Z

172.68.47.126: /* Transcript */

{{comic
| number = 1978
| date = April 9, 2018
| title = Congressional Testimony
| image = congressional_testimony.png
| titletext = James Cameron's Terminator 3 was the REALLY prophetic one. That's why Skynet sent a robot back to the 1990s to prevent him from ever making it, ultimately handing the franchise over to other directors.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created in the past by a TERMINATOR - Please change this comment in the future when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon or in the past.}}

Megan and Cueball are talking about Mark Zuckerberg's upcoming testimony.

Megan then starts talking about rewatching The Terminator, a movie about a killer robot.

Cueball recalls that it was weird how the phone book turned into Skynet.

The title text makes the claim that Skynet, likely in fear of humans seeing it, had a robot time travel in order to stop the creation of Terminator 3.

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball sitting against a leafless tree; they are on opposite sides.]
:Megan: Mark Zuckerberg is testifying before congress this week.
:Cueball: Should be interesting.

:[Beat panel.]

:Megan: I recently re-watched ''Terminator''.
:Cueball: Yeah?

:Megan: It's weird that the thing that evolved into Skynet wasn't our nuclear launch systems '''''or''''' our humanoid robots.
:Megan: It was the phone book where the Terminator looked up Sarah Connor's address.
:Cueball: Funny how things turn out.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

1978: Congressional Testimony

2018-04-09T17:45:47Z

172.68.47.126: Slightly more accurate (maybe)

{{comic
| number = 1978
| date = April 9, 2018
| title = Congressional Testimony
| image = congressional_testimony.png
| titletext = James Cameron's Terminator 3 was the REALLY prophetic one. That's why Skynet sent a robot back to the 1990s to prevent him from ever making it, ultimately handing the franchise over to other directors.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created in the past by a TERMINATOR - Please change this comment in the future when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon or in the past.}}

Megan and Cueball are talking about Mark Zuckerberg's upcoming testimony.

Megan then starts talking about rewatching The Terminator, a movie about a killer robot.

Cueball recalls that it was weird how the phone book turned into Skynet.

The title text makes the claim that Skynet, likely in fear of humans seeing it, had a robot time travel in order to stop the creation of Terminator 3.

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball sitting against a leafless tree; they are sitting on opposite sides.]
:Megan: Mark Zuckerberg is testifying before congress this week.
:Cueball: Should be interesting.

:[Beat panel.]

:Megan: I recently re-watched ''Terminator''.
:Cueball: Yeah?

:Megan: It's weird that the thing that evolved into Skynet wasn't our nuclear launch systems '''''or''''' our humanoid robots.
:Megan: It was the phone book where the Terminator looked up Sarah Connor's address.
:Cueball: Funny how things turn out.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

1978: Congressional Testimony

2018-04-09T17:42:35Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1978
| date = April 9, 2018
| title = Congressional Testimony
| image = congressional_testimony.png
| titletext = James Cameron's Terminator 3 was the REALLY prophetic one. That's why Skynet sent a robot back to the 1990s to prevent him from ever making it, ultimately handing the franchise over to other directors.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created in the past by a TERMINATOR - Please change this comment in the future when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon or in the past.}}

Megan and Cueball are talking about Mark Zuckerberg's upcoming testimony.

Megan then starts talking about rewatching The Terminator, a movie about a killer robot.

Cueball recalls that it was weird how the phone book turned into Skynet.

The title text makes the claim that Skynet, likely in fear of humans seeing it, had a robot time travel in order to stop the creation of Terminator 3.

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball sitting against a leafless tree facing opposite directions.]
:Megan: Mark Zuckerberg is testifying before congress this week.
:Cueball: Should be interesting.

:[Beat panel.]

:Megan: I recently re-watched ''Terminator''.
:Cueball: Yeah?

:Megan: It's weird that the thing that evolved into Skynet wasn't our nuclear launch systems '''''or''''' our humanoid robots.
:Megan: It was the phone book where the Terminator looked up Sarah Connor's address.
:Cueball: Funny how things turn out.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

684: We Get It

2018-03-07T20:47:25Z

172.68.47.126: /* Transcript */

{{comic
| number = 684
| date = January 4, 2010
| title = We Get It
| image = we_get_it.png
| titletext = The most brutal way I've ever seen someone handle this was 'Oh, you have a girlfriend. Are you going to get married?' 'I, uh, don't know--' 'Well, do you love her?' '...' 'Anyway, what were you saying about the movie?'
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Avatar (film)|Avatar}} is a 2009 movie that was very popular in theaters, becoming the highest-grossing of all time.

The comic illustrates how someone in a new relationship tends to be overly eager and giddy to let everyone know about it, while others tend to not be all that interested. The character on the left is so excited to let everyone know, that he goes off panel to get a ladder and a loudspeaker. The second character thinks it should be legal to murder (or at least wound) him for this annoyance if he acts like this for more than a week. The first character is so giddy that he doesn't notice what he has done and even tries to mention his girlfriend again.

The title text describes a very harsh way to respond to this annoyance. Since someone in the position of the first character is so excited about the new romantic commitment in their life, their friend brings up the much greater and more serious commitment of marriage. If they have only been dating for a week or less, it is probably much too early for them to seriously think about marriage. The friend then implies that if they aren't already excited to marry her, then he doesn't really love her. The end result is that the first character doesn't want to talk about his relationship anymore.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and a friend are talking.]
:Cueball: Avatar? Yeah, I saw it last week with...

:[Cueball walks out of the panel.]

:[Cueball returns with a ladder and megaphone.]

:[Cueball stands on top of the ladder, shouting through a megaphone.]
:Cueball: '''''...MY GIRLFRIEND.'''''

:Friend: You know, if this phase of your relationship lasts more than a week, I'm legally allowed to stab you both.
:Cueball: What phase?
:Cueball: So, did I mention I'm seeing someone?

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

935: Missed Connections

2017-07-28T02:06:09Z

172.68.47.126: /* Explanation */ typo corrected now => know

{{comic
| number = 935
| date = August 8, 2011
| title = Missed Connections
| image = missed_connections.png
| titletext = The Street View van isn't going to find out anything Google won't already know from reading my email.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Missed Connections}} is a page on {{w|Craigslist}} in which people who saw each other briefly and want to reconnect attempt to find each other again. In the case of missed connections, one person describes themselves "Me" and describes the other person "You" in order that the second person would recognize themself and try to reconnect.

The first entry appears to be a goofy joke, although there have been many {{w|Wienermobile #Notable incidents|Wienermobile incidents}} in the past. Given the timing of this comic, one can't help but wonder if it might also be a pun referencing the then recent resignation of Rep. {{w|Anthony Weiner}} over tweeting pictures of his, well, wiener with his mobile device.

The second entry refers to a person (you) looking down into a wishing well (presumably to throw in a coin to get a wish), but someone (me) is sitting down in the well with a harpoon looking up spotting the silhouette at the top of the well. This seems like a very weird thing to do, and the vaguely human shadow may be lucky to be alive, since the only reason the "you" should know about the "me" is if the me fired the harpoon (and missed). A person sitting in a well telling people stuff (as if it was the well speaking) was the pun in [[568: Well 2]]. Oddly enough, this entry could possibly be a reference to [http://fairlyoddparents.wikia.com/wiki/Wishing_Well this] episode of {{w|The Fairly OddParents}}.

The third entry is a reference to networking. UDP stands for {{w|User Datagram Protocol}}. UDP packets don't use handshaking to verify they have contacted the correct host, so they can get lost or confused. The Cisco router location is a block of IP addresses that was unallocated at the time when this comic was published but has been allocated to Latin America and Caribbean since then. {{w|Cisco}} is a company that makes networking equipment. This is a play on a missed connection for someone who was lost and asked for directions.

The fourth entry is a reference to [http://m.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2011/08/fox-blasts-obamas-hip-hop-bbq-for-failing-to-create-jobs/243183/ two] [http://www.foxnews.com/on-air/hannity/transcript/should-controversial-rapper-common-have-been-invited-white-house events] in 2011 in which President {{w|Barack Obama}} invited rappers--among other people--to the White House. After each event, right-wing commentators blasted the event as a party unbecoming of the dignity of the White House. {{w|Nancy Pelosi}} is the Democratic Leader of the {{w|US House of Representatives}}. The acronym (D-CA) is a common notation for politicians which notates party (D for Democrat) and state (CA for California). Pelosi would have also been invited to these events, and the missed connections listing is a reference to what the commentators imagined the event would have been like. A "{{w|juggalo}}" is a term referring to a fan of the rap group {{w|Insane Clown Posse}} (which includes rapper {{w|Violent J}}), which is notorious for having wild, misogynistic and violent fanbase.

The fifth entry is a straightforward joke. One of the two people getting married was so distracted by their phone they have no clue where their spouse is now, or even who they are. Alternatively, it could be that the second party deserted the wedding because they were frustrated by their partner being distracted by their cell phone during the wedding, and the first partner is now hoping to convince them to return.

The sixth entry is a reference to how the {{w|Google Street View}} car was not only recording photos of the street in 360 degrees, it was also collecting data from unencrypted Wi-Fi networks. The comic takes this to the next level, that the Google Street View van also scans what we have in our pockets and does a retinal scan. In this case, the social security number referenced is [http://www.ssa.gov/history/ssn/misused.html the most used SSN of all time.] The retinal scan takes this even further, indicating that Google's cameras are collecting fine enough images to identify people by {{w|Retinal scan}}.

The entry gets a bit absurd when you realize with all this data, it should be trivial for the Google employee to ID and meet this young man, and would not need the Missed Connections page.

The last entry suggests that {{w|Babe Ruth}}, the American baseball slugger of 1914-1935, is actually a {{w|Time Lord}}. Time Lord is a reference to the popular sci-fi series {{w|Doctor Who}} in which The Doctor, who is a Time Lord, uses a {{w|TARDIS}}, which is a time travel machine. Possibly because he was a baseball player "ahead of his time".

The title text is another reference to the privacy concerns surrounding Google Street View van, to which Google responded by claiming that the street view camera wouldn't capture anything that someone walking by wouldn't be able to see. [[Randall]] is not worried about the street view van since he expects that Google will already know anything that such a van could discover from reading his e-mails. This last statement is of course much more serious that having a photo taken by a passing van, thus making it clear what people should fuss about, and it is not the van.

==Transcript==
:[The page is set up like the missed connections area of Craigslist, with a list of messages from an individual to a person they weren't able to communicate with at the time. All readable text is in blue. There is a large heading at the top:]
:'''Personals > Missed Connections'''

:[Below the heading there is a gray section in a black frame with two lines. The first line has a search box and a drop down menu with text and two black arrows to the right of it. The second line has three check boxes and two other boxes, all empty. all boxes has white background. Text is written many places around these boxes (and on the drop down menu), it is written in black, but none of it is readable.]

:[Below this gray section follows seven missed connections, the last being cut before the description of "Me" is finished, and the line visible is cut of, so the lower third of the letters are hidden below the comics frame.]

:You: Clinging to hood of your stolen Wienermobile, trying to reach into engine to unstick throttle
:Me: Screaming, diving out of the way

:You: Vaguely human silhouette
:Me: At bottom of wishing well with harpoon gun

:You: Confused UDP packet
:Me: Cisco router in 45.170/16 block

:You: Baddest fuckin' Juggalo at Violent J's party
:Me: Nancy Pelosi (D-Ca)

:You: Getting married to me
:Me: Also getting married, but distracted by my phone

:You: Cute boy on corner of 4th & Main, 5'11, 169lbs, social security number 078-05-1120, pockets contained $2.09 in change, keys, and a condom. Retinal scan attached
:Me: Driving street view van

:You: George Herman "Babe" Ruth
:Me: Fellow Time Lord. Saw your Tardis on third moon of


{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Social networking]]
[[Category:Doctor Who]]

Talk:930: Days of the Week

2017-07-28T01:46:35Z

172.68.47.126:

I *might* buy the print of this, but it looks like the kind of thing that varies quickly, and I want a poster that I can refer to easily and won't become outdated after a year. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|purple|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 09:17, 9 March 2013 (UTC)

Just think, If I hadn't got this far in my pilgrimage, I would never have heard of Rebecca Black. So duhh! how did a computer hack?

[[User:Weatherlawyer| I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait]] ([[User talk:Weatherlawyer|talk]]) 16:43, 23 January 2015 (UTC)

Randall missed a real opportunity to go full meta and put a ring that said "Gotta go read the new xkcd" ''{{Color|#555555|-Yh}}'' 1:09, 24 January 2016 (US Central) {{unsigned|Yhsanave}}

Anyone notice the Transcript misses Wednesday? --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.229|141.101.98.229]] 03:57, 4 December 2016 (UTC)
No it doesn't (at least not by July 2017): the "source" list is defined for Wednesday.[[Special:Contributions/172.68.47.126|172.68.47.126]] 01:46, 28 July 2017 (UTC)