explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

Talk:786: Exoplanets

2021-02-11T03:00:48Z

172.69.42.44:

There is no indication that SG:A is the city-ship being referenced. Atlantis does not fly by Orion-drive and is in no way the first Sci-fi reference to City ships. They go back at least as far as "Cities in Flight" by James Blish and possibly further, although I've found no evidence of this. {{unsigned|99.111.149.90|12:04, 19 January 2013‎ (UTC)}}

Also note that this comic is no. 786, which is the amount of known exoplanets. {{unsigned|‎152.93.147.10|09:17, 21 February 2013‎ (UTC)}}
:But this was released 2 years earlier than [[1071: Exoplanets|that count]]; still it's interesting factiod... [[User:Markhurd|Mark Hurd]] ([[User talk:Markhurd|talk]]) 11:07, 13 April 2013 (UTC)

Footfall by Larry Niven is the best example of city-ships in line with Project Orion. Basically the bigger they are the better. Big metal plate with a city on top and nuclear bombs exploding underneath. And the project started in the 50s. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Orion_(nuclear_propulsion)]--[[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.11|173.245.54.11]] 04:53, 11 May 2014 (UTC)

Before restarting Orion, why not start with a more modest goal: a facility to ''assemble'' spacecraft on the moon from parts made on Earth? Even without the mining, it'll mean we can launch a craft from Earth in several smaller rockets instead of one big one. [[User:Promethean|Promethean]] ([[User talk:Promethean|talk]]) 01:30, 14 February 2018 (UTC)
:Look at you, predicting the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artemis_program Artemis Program]... [[Special:Contributions/172.69.42.44|172.69.42.44]] 03:00, 11 February 2021 (UTC)

Talk:786: Exoplanets

2021-02-11T03:00:18Z

172.69.42.44:

370: Redwall

2021-02-03T22:37:19Z

172.69.42.44: /* Explanation */ Jinx you owe me a soda is not in the comic, so needn't be mentioned. Also, the claim that it's more common than plain jinx is dubious.

{{comic
| number = 370
| date = January 14, 2008
| title = Redwall
| image = redwall.png
| titletext = My Redwall/Jurassic Park crossover fanfic is almost complete!
}}

==Explanation==
This comic references {{w|Brian Jacques|Brian Jacques'}} series of books, ''{{w|Redwall}}'', which star sapient woodland animals in various high fantasy adventures.

The first panel shows the similarity between the story of Martin the Warrior (from the book ''{{w|Mossflower}}'') and {{w|Aragorn}} from ''{{w|The Lord of the Rings}}'' by {{w|J. R. R. Tolkien}}. The joke is that while Martin and Aragorn introduce themselves separately, they then go on to describe their particular story, which turns out to be exactly the same for both of them. Subsequently Martin jinxes Aragorn. {{w|Jinx (children's game)|Jinx}} is a common children's game that is initiated by shouting "Jinx" after somebody speaks the same word or sentence at the same time as you. That person is then jinxed, with one form of the rules dictating that they are then not permitted to speak until unjinxed by some specific action (usually somebody saying their name). For a similar children’s game, see [[392: Making Rules]].

In LOTR, orcs are unequivocally and without exception the bad guys, capable only of hate and violence (although to be fair, in some of Tolkien's unpublished writing, orcs are corrupted elves, so it is clear that they are not intrinsically bad). Similarly, Redwall's rats, foxes, ferrets, ermine, and weasels are mostly evil manipulators, while mice, rabbits, squirrels, hedgehogs, and badgers are always the good guys. On several occasions, characters explicitly state that "vermin stays vermin." This is the overarching rule, notwithstanding the rare exception (e.g. Grubbage from {{w|Triss}}). Conversely, one of the so-called "good species" has never become evil in this book series. Though it is more likely than not that this is simply the result of a {{tvtropes|PlanetOfHats|planet of hats}} - where a single species all share the same characteristics and personality, so that authors / readers don't have to spend time fleshing out / getting to know every new character - Randall nevertheless points out that this "moral absolute" is problematic and has some "racist undertones," regardless if it's intentional or not.

The second panel deals with the fact that ''Redwall'' mentions the name of {{w|Satan}} or {{w|The Devil}} 4 times, while it never mentions {{w|God}} or {{w|Jesus}}--somewhat surprisingly, given that the book is set in an abbey, and many of the inhabitants are religious brothers and sisters. [[Randall Munroe|Randall]] then points out that people who {{w|Religious debates over the Harry Potter series|protest against Harry Potter because of the series' witchcraft}}, should take note that Redwall explicitly mentions Satan, although it has had little to no negative feedback from more conservative readers.

In the third panel, Randall comments on ''Redwall'''s often-used theme of critical messages being left in riddles throughout the Abbey for the occupants to find when they are in need. Randall suggests that he would use {{w|Public-key cryptography|public-key cryptography}} to encode the messages, instead of the elaborate riddles used in the books (some of which are ridiculously easy, which doesn't exactly make for good security when dealing with sensitive information).

In the title text, Randall jokes that he is making a crossover {{w|Fan fiction|fan-fiction}} with ''Redwall'' and ''{{w|Jurassic Park}}''.

Redwall was also referenced in [[1688: Map Age Guide]] and [[1722: Debugging]].

==Transcript==
:Notes from reading Redwall books for the first time since childhood.

:Some of this feels familiar.
:Aragorn: Hi, I'm Aragorn.
:Martin: I'm Martin.
:Aragorn and Martin: I'm here to reforge my broken sword so I can lead an army against the tyrant threatening my people. I live in a world of moral absolutes and racist undertones.
:Martin: Jinx!

:It startled me when characters mentioned Satan.
:Redwall: "By Satan's whiskers..."
:Redwall mentions God/Jesus 0 times.
:Redwall mentions Satan/The Devil 4 times.
:(Harry Potter protesters, take note.)

:Even as a kid this bothered me: Why does everyone leave critical secret messages as simple riddles? It's silly to assume the intended recipient will be the only one to find and solve them. I would do things differently.
:Matthias: The inscription is a message from Martin!
:Brother Methuselah: What does it say?
:Matthias: Hang on, it's encrypted with my public key.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Bar charts]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Religion]]
[[Category:Cryptography]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Fiction]]
[[Category:Harry Potter]]

Talk:2412: 1/100,000th Scale World

2021-01-15T17:40:22Z

172.69.42.44:

Sprites?

[[Special:Contributions/172.68.174.44|172.68.174.44]] 17:01, 15 January 2021 (UTC)

Looks like there is a form of electrical discharge that can occur above thunderstorms called a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sprite_(lightning) Sprite]

It actually took me a second to realise this was a new comic, I thought Randal just added different jokes to Wednesday's for some reason. Given the title text, I wonder what projection Randall would use for this scale model... I imagine a projection similar to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Build_the_Earth#Map_projection Build the Earth's modified Airocean] would work for something like this.--[[Special:Contributions/172.69.35.85|172.69.35.85]] 17:12, 15 January 2021 (UTC)

893: 65 Years

2020-12-18T02:16:57Z

172.69.42.44: /* Explanation */ fixed a typo

{{comic
| number = 893
| date = May 2, 2011
| title = 65 Years
| image = 65 years.png
| titletext = The universe is probably littered with the one-planet graves of cultures which made the sensible economic decision that there's no good reason to go into space--each discovered, studied, and remembered by the ones who made the irrational decision.
}}
==Explanation==
[[Randall]] is showing the number of still living humans who have walked on another world for the 65-year period that begins in 1969 (when a human first walked on the moon). Up to 2011 (when the comic was drawn), he has drawn a single line for the actual figures.

For the subsequent years, he has drawn three lines using {{w|actuarial table}}s or life tables (such tables show, for each age, the probability that a certain person will die within the next year).

The line marked "5TH PERCENTILE" indicates that there is a 95% probability that the number alive in a given year will be above that line and a 5% probability that the number alive will be below that line. For example, this line indicates a 5% chance that all Apollo moon walkers will be dead by 2023, and a 95% chance that at least one will still be alive by that year.

The line marked "95TH PERCENTILE" indicates that there is a 5% probability that the number alive in a given year will be above that line and a 95% probability that the number alive will be below that line. For example, this line indicates a 95% chance that all Apollo moon walkers will be dead by 2035, and a 5% chance that at least one will still be alive by that year.

The middle line is not identified, but is probably the "50TH PERCENTILE" (see [http://blog.xkcd.com/2012/07/12/a-morbid-python-script/ these tables]). If so, it indicates that there is a 50% probability that the number alive in a given year will be above that line and a 50% probability that the number alive will be below that line. For example, this line indicates a 50% chance that all Apollo moon walkers will be dead by 2028 (see previous link), and a 50% chance that at least one will still be alive by that year.

Although the term ''other world'' would include all other worlds on which humans have walked, there is currently only one other world on which humans have walked, which is the moon. The humans that have walked there are the 12 {{w|List of Apollo astronauts#Apollo astronauts who walked on the Moon|Apollo astronauts}} who landed on the Moon between 1969 and 1972.

In particular, {{w|Neil Armstrong}} and {{w|Buzz Aldrin}} landed in July 1969. {{w|Pete Conrad}} and {{w|Alan Bean}} landed in November. {{w|Alan Shepard}} and {{w|Edgar Mitchell}}: February 1971. {{w|David Scott}} and {{w|James Irwin}}: July 1971. {{w|John Young (astronaut)|John Young}} and {{w|Charles Duke}}: April 1972. {{w|Eugene Cernan}} and {{w|Harrison Schmitt}}: December 1972.

Irwin died in 1991. Shepard and Conrad died in 1998 and 1999 respectively, making the total 9 as of the date this comic was published. Since then Armstrong died in 2012, Mitchell in 2016, Cernan in 2017, Young on January 6, 2018, and Bean on May 26, 2018. The current (May 2020) number is 4, which lies to the left of the middle line (the supposed 50TH PERCENTILE). The oldest living person to have landed on the moon is Aldrin at 90. Also living are Scott at 87, Schmitt at 84, and Duke at 84.

The chart assumes that no other humans will go to walk on another world within the time-frame plotted and the title text implies that this is primarily an economically determined decision. While noting that not exploring space is a justifiable and sensible decision which may also be made by many hypothetical cultures on other worlds, the text implies a grandness to a civilization that would be given the opportunity to discover, study and memorialize the 'one-world graves' of other civilizations by choosing to explore space despite the economic difficulty. This also implies that the likely consequence of not exploring space is that a civilisation which chooses to do this is doomed to go extinct fairly rapidly while those which do explore and colonise may last long enough to be safely established on multiple worlds and discover the remains of civilisations which acted on a purely economic basis and hence ensured their own collapse. High five for exoplanet archaeology.

==Transcript==
:[A graph titled 'Number of Living Humans Who Have Walked on Another World' - its y-axis is numbered 5, 10, 15, its x-axis increments every ten years from 1960-2040. The line of the graph has a bracket above it that says '65 Years', starting at 1969, ending in 2034.
:The line starts at 1969 and increases steeply to 12 by 1972. It then plateaus until the early nineties, declines gradually to 9 between 1991-1999, and then plateaus again.
:From 2011-2035, which is labeled 'Projected Actuarial Tables', the line branches into three and begins to decline more steeply to zero. The area between the first and second branch is shaded and labeled '5th percentile' and the area between the second and third branch is shaded and labeled '95th percentile.']

==Trivia==
*The theme of actuarial projections was explored earlier in [[493: Actuarial]]; Randall's morbid python script for both was given in [http://blog.xkcd.com/2012/07/12/a-morbid-python-script/ the blag].
{| class="wikitable"
|+Table of men who walked the moon
|- style="background:#ccc;"
| style="width:20px;"|
| '''Name'''
| '''Born'''
| '''Died'''
| '''Age at first step'''
| '''Mission'''
| '''Lunar dates'''
| '''Service'''
| '''Alma Mater'''
|- style="background:#def;"
| 1. || {{w|Neil Armstrong}}|| 1930-08-05 || 2012-08-25 || 38y 11m 15d
|rowspan="2"| {{w|Apollo 11}} ||rowspan="2"| July 21, 1969 || {{w|NASA}} || {{w|Purdue University}}, {{w|University of Southern California}}
|- style="background:#def;"
| 2. || {{w|Buzz Aldrin}}|| 1930-01-20 || || 39y 6m 0d || {{w|United States Air Force|Air Force}} || {{w|United States Military Academy}}, {{w|MIT}}
|- style="background:#ffe8e8;"
| 3. || {{w|Pete Conrad}} || 1930-06-02 || 1999-07-08 || 39y 5m 17d
|rowspan="2"| {{w|Apollo 12}} ||rowspan="2"| November 19–20, 1969 || {{w|United States Navy|Navy}} || {{w|Princeton University}}
|- style="background:#ffe8e8;"
| 4. || {{w|Alan Bean}}|| 1932-03-15 || 2018-05-26 || 37y 8m 4d || {{w|United States Navy|Navy}} || {{w|University of Texas, Austin}}
|- style="background:#def;"
| 5. || {{w|Alan Shepard}} || 1923-11-18 || 1998-07-21 || 47y 2m 18d
|rowspan="2"| {{w|Apollo 14}} ||rowspan="2"| February 5–6, 1971 || {{w|United States Navy|Navy}} || {{w|United States Naval Academy}}
|- style="background:#def;"
| 6. || {{w|Edgar Mitchell}}|| 1930-09-07 || 2016-02-04 || 40y 4m 19d || {{w|United States Navy|Navy}} || {{w|Carnegie Mellon University}}, {{w|Naval Postgraduate School}}, {{w|MIT}}
|- style="background:#ffe8e8;"
| 7. || {{w|David Scott}} || 1932-06-06 || || 39y 1m 25d
|rowspan="2"| {{w|Apollo 15}} ||rowspan="2"| July 31 - August 2, 1971 || {{w|United States Air Force|Air Force}} || {{w|University of Michigan}} (freshman year, and later, an honorary doctorate), {{w|United States Military Academy}}, {{w|MIT}}
|- style="background:#ffe8e8;"
| 8. || {{w|James Irwin}} || 1930-03-17 || 1991-08-08 || 41y 4m 14d || {{w|United States Air Force|Air Force}} || {{w|United States Naval Academy}}, {{w|University of Michigan}}
|- style="background:#def;"
| 9. || {{w|John Young (astronaut)|John W. Young}}|| 1930-09-24 || 2018-01-06 || 41y 6m 28d
|rowspan="2"| {{w|Apollo 16}} ||rowspan="2"| April 21–23, 1972 || {{w|United States Navy|Navy}} || {{w|Georgia Institute of Technology}}
|- style="background:#def;"
| 10. || {{w|Charles Duke}} || 1935-10-03 || || 36y 6m 18d || {{w|United States Air Force|Air Force}} || {{w|United States Naval Academy}}, {{w|MIT}}
|- style="background:#ffe8e8;"
| 11. || {{w|Eugene Cernan}} || 1934-03-14 || 2017-01-16 || 38y 9m 7d
|rowspan="2"| {{w|Apollo 17}} ||rowspan="2"| December 11–14, 1972 || {{w|United States Navy|Navy}} || {{w|Purdue University}}, {{w|Naval Postgraduate School}}
|- style="background:#ffe8e8;"
| 12. || {{w|Harrison Schmitt}} || 1935-07-03 || || 37y 5m 8d || {{w|NASA}} || {{w|Caltech}}, {{w|University of Oslo}} (exchange), {{w|Harvard University}}
|}

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Line graphs]]
[[Category:Math]]
[[Category:Statistics]]
[[Category:Science]]
[[Category:Space]]
[[Category:Comics to make one feel old]]

2385: Final Exam

2020-11-13T23:33:28Z

172.69.42.44: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2385
| date = November 13, 2020
| title = Final Exam
| image = final_exam.png
| titletext = For those of you also taking Game Theory, your grade in that class will be based on how close your grade on this exam is to 80% of the average.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a FAILING CYBERSECURITY STUDENT. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

In this comic, Ponytail appears to be administering a cybersecurity exam. However, at the beginning of the exam, she informs her students that they have all failed, despite not having taken a test yet. She then informs them that their grades are stored on the department sever, but will be submitted tomorrow. The implication here is that the true test, rather than being a traditional exam is actually whether the students can hack into the server and change their grade. This may be a jab at education security which is know to be lax, or at the very least based on antiquated hardware and software, therefore being vulnerable to assault.
In real life, students have attempted to change their grades in this manner, with some success.

The title text adds a twist to this. In order for a student to get a good grade in the game theory class, they need to get a below average grade on this final exam. This incentivizes the students to also change the grades of other students when they change their grade. Specifically, if they want a good grade in both classes, they should give all of their fellow students a grade of about 126% on the cybersecurity final while giving themselves a grade of about 100% on it. This way, their grade in the cybersecurity class would be about 80% of the average, giving them a nearly perfect grade in the game theory class in addition to a perfect grade on the cybersecurity final.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[Ponytail standing in front of a whiteboard]
:Ponytail: Welcome to your final exam.
:Ponytail: The exam is now over.
:Ponytail: I'm afraid all of you failed.
:Ponytail: Your grades have been stored on our department server and will be submitted tomorrow.
:Ponytail: Class dismissed.

:[Caption below the panel]:
: Cybersecurity final exams

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Computer security]]
[[Category: Psychology]]

2385: Final Exam

2020-11-13T23:25:47Z

172.69.42.44: I actually created the "created by" thing for once! Let's see if it stays, lol.

2372: Dialect Quiz

2020-10-16T17:02:36Z

172.69.42.44: Finished poll results

{{comic
| number = 2372
| date = October 14, 2020
| title = Dialect Quiz
| image = dialect_quiz.png
| titletext = Do you make a distinction between shallots, scallops, and scallions? If you use all three words, do they all have different meanings, all the same, or are two the same and one different?
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a LIGHTBULB EATER and Delaware Line painter. Poll results should be added into the Trivia section. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic is a parody of online quizzes that offer to compare the user's dialect of American English with others around the country. These quizzes generally contain questions about word usage, names for certain objects, and pronunciations that vary between different regions of the US. There are also quizzes about broader English dialects, but this comic focuses on commonly cited differences between American dialects.

The earliest quiz of this type to be widely disseminated online was the [http://dialect.redlog.net/ Harvard Dialect Survey], conducted in the early 2000s by Bert Vaux and Scott Golder. The survey created maps of the distribution of various word usage (such as pop/soda/Coke for a fizzy drink) and was a relatively early example of widely shared Internet "viral" content. In 2013, Josh Katz of the New York Times created [https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/upshot/dialect-quiz-map.html a new version] based on the Harvard survey, which became the Times' [https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/01/-em-the-new-york-times-em-most-popular-story-of-2013-was-not-an-article/283167/ most popular content of 2013] and spread the idea to many more people. Many of the questions in this comic directly derive from entries in those surveys.

Randall's previous two comics have been about election predictions, leading up to the 2020 US General Presidential Election. A prominent predictor of the election results is Nate Silver, who runs the FiveThirtyEight website. [https://twitter.com/NateSilver538/status/1315348221565206530 @NateSilver538 posted his results] of taking the New York Times version of the survey on October 11, 2020... just three days before this comic was posted. [[2371: Election Screen Time]] specifically suggests that Randall may be spending too much time obsessing over new posts and content from the election predictors. It's coincidental, but likely, that Nate Silver's tweet inspired Randall's post: he was reminded of the 2013 feature from the Times.

{| border =1 width=100% cellpadding=5 class="wikitable"
! # !! Question !! Answers !! Explanation
|-
! 1
|How do you address a group of two or more people?
|style="width: 15%;"|
* A) You
* B) Y'all
* C) I have not been around two or more people for so long that I can't remember
| Reference to the first question of the Times quiz: "How would you address {{w|You#Informal_plural_forms|a group of two or more people}}?" (with options including "you all", "you guys", "y'all", etc.). Option C may reference the significant decrease in human interaction and social contact during the COVID-19 pandemic. Alternatively, it may suggest that some xkcd readers are particularly introverted.
|-
! 2
| How do you pronounce "Penelope"?
|
* A) Rhymes with "Antelope"
* B) Rhymes with "Develop"
| Both the options for this are wrong, making it the first of many quiz questions it is impossible to answer correctly.

Neither Option A's "PEN-e-lohp" /ˈpɛnɪˌloʊp/ and Option B's "pe-NELL-up" /pɪˈnɛləp/ are a typical pronunciation of this name (beyond mispronunciations). In English, the only correct way to pronounce this name is "pe-NELL-o-pee" /pəˈnɛləpi/, which is not listed. (Penelope is a proper name, but usually encountered in literature rather than as the name of a neighbor, and is therefore less subject to dialect shifts.)
|-
! 3
| What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
|
* A) Astrology
* B) Agronomy
* C) Cosmetology
| The actual answer is {{w|Astronomy}}, which is not listed. {{w|Astrology}} is the pseudo-scientific "study" of the influence of the stars and planets on our lives, including horoscopes (often confused with Astronomy due to its similar name), {{w|Agronomy}} ''is'' scientific but instead studies agriculture, and {{w|Cosmetology}} is the study of cosmetics and makeup (with a name close to {{w|Cosmology}}, a branch of Astronomy). The last may also be referring to the (occasionally makeup-heavy) faces of movie and television "stars".
|-
! 4
| How do you pronounce "genre"?
|
* A) Gone-ra
* B) Juh-neer
* C) Jen-er-uh
| Reference to a question found on some quizzes: "How do you pronounce ''genre''? ZHAHN-ruh, or JAHN-ruh?"

A majority of (American) English speakers pronounce "genre" as either "'''ZH'''AHN-ruh" /ˈʒɑnrə/ (beginning with the "zh" sound found in "trea'''s'''ure") or "'''J'''AHN-ruh" /ˈdʒɑnrə/ (beginning with the "j" sound in "justice"). Neither of these are listed, and none of the quiz's pronunciation options are common. However, they are close to other words: ''GONE-ra'' /ˈgɑnrə/ sounds like {{w|gonorrhea}} /ˌgɑnəˈriə/, ''juh-NEER'' /dʒəˈnɪər/ is the way the second and third syllables of ''engineer'' are are pronounced, and ''JEN-er-uh'' /ˈdʒɛnərə/ is a word (genera), the plural of {{w|genus}}.
|-
! 5
| You pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
|
* A) First syllable
* B) Second syllable
| Reference to general questions regarding differences in pronunciation of words. "Google" is not generally pronounced with a high-pitched yelp on either syllable.{{Citation needed}} {{w|Yahoo!}}, on the other hand, has advertised its services with a [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fm5FE0x9eY0 high-pitched yodeling jingle], with the high-pitched yelp on the second syllable (as opposed to {{w|Goofy}}'s [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-70mtXw35c iconic holler], with the high yelp on the first syllable).
|-
! 6
| What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
|
* A) Gutter pipe
* B) Drainpipe
| Reference to a quiz question in the Harvard and Times quizzes, "What do you call the thing from which you might drink water in a school?" Answers included "drinking fountain", "water fountain", and "bubbler". However, the question in this comic implies that school children (or at least the quiz maker) drink out of {{w|Rain gutter|gutter pipes}} or drain pipes, which are used to collect rainwater and/or {{w|sewage|should absolutely not be drunk from.}}
|-
! 7
| How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
|
* A) Animated give
* B) Animated gift
| Reference to the "{{w|Gif}}" pronunciation debate, with people split between pronouncing it "gif" (with the hard G sound in "graphics") or "jif" (with the soft G sound in "giraffe"). Both options presented in this quiz use the hard G sound, but neither option uses the commonly-agreed on pronunciation for the ending of the word, “if”. Both options refute the common “jif” argument that a g followed by an i usually results in a “j” sound, as in giraffe.
|-
! 8
| What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
|
* A) What?
* B) Lawn buddies
| There are many different varieties of common insects with distinctive traits and behaviors, some of which even have multiple names; the (as-of-yet undiscovered) "lawn buddies" combine three of these traits into one (rather peculiar) creature.
1. The Harvard and Times quizzes actually include the question: "What do you call the {{w|Armadillidiidae|small gray bug}} that curls up into a ball when it’s touched?" (options include "roly-poly," "pill-bug", "potato bug", "doodle bug", etc.).

It is also worth mentioning that "potato bug" itself can refer to three completely different kinds of insect; besides the aforementioned "{{w|Armadillidiidae|small gray bug}}," it can also refer to the {{w|Colorado potato beetle}} or to the {{w|Jerusalem cricket}}. A dialect quiz such as this one might ask the quiz-taker to identify what kind of insect they associate the term with.

2. The {{w|Firefly|Lampyridae}} family of insects do glow (although not exactly "brightly".) These insects emit their light spontaneously, as a mating signal, and not in response to external stimuli such as being poked. These are variously called "fireflies," "glowworms," or "lightning bugs;" a dialect quiz might reasonably ask the quiz-taker's preferred term.

3. {{w|cicada|Cicadas}} and {{w|Madagascar_hissing_cockroach|cockroaches}} can approach being "baseball-sized" and can make very loud noises indeed, although it would be a bit of a stretch to describe any of their associated sounds as a "warbling scream."
|-
! 9
| What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
|
* A) Prank lines
* B) Devil's Marks
* C) Fool-me lines
* D) Fauxguides
* E) Delaware lines
| Reference to the fact that some quiz questions ask about road features, such as "verge/berm/parking strip/curb strip" and "roundabout/traffic circle". However, these particular road lines, if they have ever been made, aren't common enough to warrant different names. The Delaware Line was a formation within the Continental Army. May also just be a dig at Delaware. Devil's Marks may be a takeoff of [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Devil%27s%20Strip Devil's Strip]

Misleading lines on the road were also mentioned in [[1958: Self-Driving Issues]].
|-
! 10
| What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer Solar System?
|
* A) Uranus
* B) Neptune
| This question references the two common pronunciations of Uranus: "YURR-ə-nəss" and "yoo-RAY-nəss" (which sounds like the phrase "{{tvtropes|UranusIsShowing|Your anus}}", a favorite joke of little kids). The original pronunciation is "oo-ra-noos", both u's pronounced the same way, but this is not a common pronunciation among the general public. It also references the fact that Uranus and Neptune are both blue-ish colored planets in the outer solar system and are often confused by people who don't know much about them. Uranus is closer to being the correct answer - it could plausibly be described as cyan, a color intermediate between blue and green - while Neptune is a deep, unambiguous blue.
|-
! 11
| What do you call this tool?
[[File:CloveHammer.png|150px]] (image of a claw hammer)
|
* A) Banger
* B) Nail axe
* C) Wood mage wand
* D) I'm familiar with this tool but have no specific word for it
* E) I have never seen it before
| The only name most people would ever call this tool is a "hammer".

The last two options reference options in many quiz questions along the lines of "I'm familiar with this but have no specific word for it" and "I am not familiar with this" (such as on the pill-bug/roly-poly question on the real quiz). These may appear as options to questions that ask about something that might not exist everywhere, or something which many may not have a word for (for example, some areas of the United States have a name for "sunshowers," while most don't). However, it's a bit absurd for these options to be present for this question (and this question alone), as virtually all users in an English dialect test would be expected to know what a hammer is. This also serves as a bit of reverse perspective on "When the only tool you have is a hammer ..."
|-
! 12
| What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
|
* A) A long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff
* B) A longwich
* C) A salad hot dog
| Reference to a common dialect quiz question: "What do you call a {{w|Submarine sandwich|long sandwich}}?" with options typically including "sub", "hoagie", "hero", etc.

The hot dog answer could refer to the common online discussion: "Is a hot dog a sandwich?"
|-
! 13
| What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
|
* A) Lightbulb eater
* B) I have no special name for them
* C) I've never looked in my attic
| Another reference to the frequent appearance of quiz questions asking what users call various creepy crawlies.

{{w|Millipedes}} best fit the description. They have many legs, though rarely if ever a thousand of them, as their name (from the Latin word for "thousand feet") suggests. The hard rings that separate an individual's body into segments give the animal a scaly appearance. And of the thousands of species, only a few have common names, hence "no special name for them". The reference to "lightbulb eater" is obscure, but may refer to the tendency of millipedes to congregate in large numbers in dark crevices. Perhaps Randall found some in empty (no bulb) light fixtures in his attic.

Or maybe it is just the sort of spooky monster that lives in the dark and makes you afraid to check the attic (or basement).

Normally, questions about uncommon things would include an "I've never seen one" option, like option E in the hammer question. Instead, this question has "I've never looked in my attic" as an option, implying that these creatures are present in all attics, and anyone who doesn't know them is simply unaware of the monster dwelling in their own attic.
|-
! 14
| What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
|
* A) "What was that?"
* B) "Oh, wow."
* C) [Quietly] "Yikes."
| Reference to a question on some quizzes about which of several words/phrases you say in response to a sneeze, with usual answers including "bless you", "God bless you", and "{{w|Gesundheit}}" (from the German word for 'health').

This question may also be referencing the {{w|COVID-19 pandemic}} in answer C (and possibly answer B). Sneezing isn't a primary symptom of COVID-19, but most people are hyper-aware of possibly contracting the disease from the people around them so sneezes are treated with suspicion and it's seen as rude to sneeze openly.

It is also possible that a person who has been able to catch a sneeze-producing condition has also caught COVID-19 and, while the sneeze itself isn't ''caused'' by it, the air and various airway fluids so forcefully projected are a possible infective vector with that little extra frisson of concern, given the current situation.
|-
! Title Text
| colspan=2 | Do you make a distinction between shallots, scallops, and scallions? If you use all three words, do they all have different meanings, all the same, or are two the same and one different?
| Phrased similarly to questions like, on the Times quiz, "How do you pronounce the words Mary, merry, and marry?" Options included "all three are pronounced the same", "all three are pronounced differently," or all three combinations of two being the same and one different. Refers to the naming confusion around {{w|scallions}} and {{w|shallots}} - also known as 'eschalots' - but with the unrelated but similar-sounding {{w|scallops}} substituted in the middle.

'Shallots', 'scallions' and 'eschalots' are names used in different dialects, for various species and cultivars of onion used in cooking, either as a small bulb (especially [[wikipedia:shallot|Allium cepa var. Aggregatum]]) or as a green leaf (especially [[wikipedia:Allium_fistulosum|Allium fistulosum]]). In many dialects, the green leaf type is called a 'scallion' and the bulb a 'shallot'. In at least one dialect (NSW Australia) the green leaf type is called a 'shallot' and the bulb an 'eschalot'. This causes confusion in recipes posted online. The word 'shallot' is also pronounced with emphasis on either the first or second syllable, as refered to in question 5. Despite the answer options offered, there is no evidence of dialects which use all three terms, or where 'shallot' and 'scallion' are interchangeable.

{{w|Scallops}} are invertebrate marine animals similar to oysters and clams, frequently harvested for food. In some regions of the UK and Australia potato {{w|fritters}} are also called 'scallops'. The word 'scallop' itself can be pronounced either as /ˈskɒləp/ or /ˈskæləp/, and its spelling has varied over time in a similar way to that of 'shallot'. However, these are difficult to confuse with shallots or scallions.
|}

==Transcript==

[Box with title at the top]
:<big>Dialect Quiz</big>
[Smaller subtitle underneath]
:Compare answers with your friends!

[Quiz is divided into two columns. Answers to questions are indicated by a letter followed by a closed parentheses, such as A). These letters are greyed out]

[Column 1:]
 
How do you address a group of two or more people?
:A) You
:B) Y'all
:C) I have not been around two or more people for so long that I can't remember

How do you pronounce "Penelope"?
:A) Rhymes with "Antelope"
:B) Rhymes with "Develop"

What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
:A) Astrology
:B) Agronomy
:C) Cosmetology

How do you pronounce "genre"?
:A) Gone-ra
:B) Juh-neer
:C) Jen-er-uh

You pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
:A) First syllable
:B) Second syllable

What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
:A) Gutter pipe
:B) Drainpipe

How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
:A) Animated give
:B) Animated gift

What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
:A) What?
:B) Lawn buddies

[Column 2:]
 
What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
:A) Prank lines
:B) Devil's Marks
:C) Fool-me lines
:D) Fauxguides
:E) Delaware lines

What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer Solar System?
:A) Uranus
:B) Neptune

What do you call this tool?
 
[Image of a claw hammer]
:A) Banger
:B) Nail axe
:C) Wood mage wand
:D) I'm familiar with this tool but have no specific word for it
:E) I have never seen it before

What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
:A) A long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff
:B) A longwich
:C) A salad hot dog

What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
:A) Lightbulb eater
:B) I have no special name for them
:C) I've never looked in my attic

What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
:A) "What was that?"
:B) "Oh, wow."
:C) [Quietly] "Yikes."

==Trivia==

*The xkcd Twitter account posted a [https://twitter.com/xkcd/status/1316484953480323072 series of Twitter polls] asking the questions in this comic.
**How do you address a group of two or more people?
***You (31.2%)
***Y'all (33.5%)
***'''Can’t remember anymore (35.3%)'''
**How do you pronounce “Penelope”?
***'''Rhymes with “antelope” (58.6%)'''
***Rhymes with “develop” (41.4%)
**What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
***Astrology (34.5%)
***Agronomy (18.5%)
***'''Cosmetology (47%)'''
**How do you pronounce "genre"?
***Gone-ra (24.7%)
***Juh-neer (18.8%)
***'''Jen-er-uh (56.5%)'''
**Do you pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
***'''First syllable (63.6%)'''
***Second syllable (36.4%)
**What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
***Gutter pipe (32.9%)
***'''Drainpipe (67.1%)'''
**How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
***Animated give (29.6%)
***'''Animated gift (70.4%)'''
**What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
***What? (48.6%)
***'''Lawn buddies (51.4%)'''
**What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
***Prank/fool-me lines (14.8%)
***Devil's marks (22%)
***Fauxguides (22.5%)
***'''Delaware lines (40.6%)'''
**What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer solar system?
***'''Uranus (51.7%)'''
***Neptune (48.3%)
**What do you call this tool? 🔨
***'''Banger (29.7%)'''
***Nail axe (22%)
***Wood mage wand (29.1%)
***Don't know/not familiar (19.2%)
**What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
***'''That description verbatim (43.1%)'''
***A longwich (33.2%)
***A salad hot dog (23.7%)
**What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
***Lightbulb eater (29.5%)
***Don't have a name for it (19%)
***'''Never looked in my attic (51.5%)'''
**What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
***"What was that?" (8.6%)
***"Oh, wow." (17.1%)
***'''[quietly] "Yikes." (74.3%)'''
*Shallots, scallops, and scallions ran against each other in [[1529: Bracket]]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:COVID-19]]

2069: Wishlist

2020-10-13T20:30:37Z

172.69.42.44: /* Explanation */ Just adding steve :-)

{{comic
| number = 2069
| date = November 7, 2018
| title = Wishlist
| image = wishlist.png
| titletext = Disappointed that they caved to fan pressure and went with Ruth Bader Ginsburg over Elena Kagan.
}}

==Explanation==
''{{w|Super Smash Brothers}}'' (also titled as ''Super Smash Bros.'' and usually shortened to ''Smash'') is a crossover fighting game series published by {{w|Nintendo}}, primarily featuring Nintendo characters. As of publish date, there are 77 playable characters across the 5 games in the series. Starting with the third game, ''Super Smash Bros. Brawl'', characters from third-party franchises (non-Nintendo) have been made available, though most of them had at least made major appearances on a Nintendo system at some point. This comic is a parody of various fans' wishes for the roster of ''Super Smash Bros. Ultimate'', which was announced in 2018 along with multiple trailers revealing new characters to appear in the roster. In the November 1st trailer it was stated every new character in the launch version of the game had been announced, though with five more characters coming in 2019 as {{w|downloadable content}}.

Throughout the series fans have suggested new characters to add; however, developer acquiescence to these requests is rare, with only six characters out of 77 ({{w|King Dedede}}, Steve, {{w|Sonic the Hedgehog}}, {{w|Ryu (Street Fighter)|Ryu}}, {{w|Bayonetta (character)|Bayonetta}}, and {{w|Ridley (Metroid)|Ridley}}) having been added this way. On November 3, the developer studio {{w|Sora Ltd.}} made a statement on Twitter telling fans that the unrevealed DLC characters were finalized and they were not accepting further requests.

This comic lists 16 "characters" that Randall supposedly wishes were made available in ''Super Smash Bros.'', ranging from plausible playable characters, to the absurd.

; Mario / Luigi hybrid
: {{w|Mario}} and {{w|Luigi}} are characters in the ''{{w|Super Mario}}'' series, one of Nintendo's flagship franchises. They are both playable characters in the ''Super Smash Bros.'' series. A hybrid of these two characters would be quite interesting, even though such a concept does not exist within the Super Mario series. When considering how Mario and Luigi have evolved throughout the Smash series, one could argue that {{w|Dr. Mario}} is a hybrid of these two in terms of moveset.

; The SkiFree monster
: ''{{w|SkiFree}}'' is a computer game for Windows released in 1991. The player controls a skier trying to avoid obstacles. After the end of a full run, a {{w|Yeti|white furry monster}} appears, and tries to catch the player. The ''SkiFree'' monster was a subject of the [[667: SkiFree]] comic. Unlike most of the characters on this list, the ''SkiFree'' monster at least has had an appearance on a Nintendo system, as the game had a {{w|Game Boy Color}} port as part of the "The Best of Entertainment Pack" in 2001.

; Siri
: {{w|Siri}} is the name given to Apple's personal virtual assistant for iOS, macOS, and its other operating systems. Siri is generally a voice without a visual representation, so it is unclear how Siri would be a playable character in ''Super Smash Bros.''

; Ellie from ''Up''
: Ellie is one of the characters in ''{{w|Up (2009 film)|Up}}'', a 2009 {{w|Pixar}} film. In the beginning of the film, Ellie passes away, leaving her husband Carl alone, and leading him to start his adventure in Paradise Falls. While there was a {{w|Up (video game)|tie-in video game based on the movie}} released in the same year for multiple systems (including the Wii and Nintendo DS), Ellie was not playable in it.

; Zordon
: {{w|Zordon}} is a fictional character from the ''Power Rangers'' franchise who serves as the mentor for the earlier Ranger teams. While he is technically trapped in another dimension, he is usually depicted as a blurry head in a tube. He occasionally has lightning powers, and had a robot sidekick (Alpha 5) who might be able to move him around. Alas, he is currently dead, having used his life energy to remove all evil from the galaxy at that time. While there have been many Power Rangers video games over the years, including on Nintendo platforms, Zordon would be an unlikely character not only due to his lack of extremities, but also due to the fact that the Power Rangers franchise is primarily built on stock footage of the Japanese ''Super Sentai'' series.

; Clippy
: Clippit, commonly nicknamed {{w|Clippy}}, was one of the Office Assistants for {{w|Microsoft Office}} (versions 1997 to 2003). It was an user interface with the purpose to assist users. Clippy (and the other Office Assistants) was negatively received by users, and was eventually removed in Office 2007.

; The Sarlaac [sic]
: The {{w|Sarlacc}} is an alien monster that lived in {{w|Tatooine}} in the ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' universe. It is most prominently shown in the film ''{{w|Return of the Jedi}}'', when the main heroes are sentenced to death by being dropped into the Sarlacc's mouth. Notably, the Sarlacc is a large, stationary creature embedded in the ground (essentially, a pit).
: This could be a reference to the {{w|List_of_recurring_Mario_franchise_enemies#Piranha_Plant|Piranha Plant}} being confirmed as a DLC character, as Piranha Plants are typically stationary and embedded in the ground, and also have their big, toothy mouth as a primary feature.
: While the Sarlacc was featured in 1994's ''{{w|Super Star Wars: Return of the Jedi}}'' for the {{w|Super Nintendo Entertainment System}}, its lack of mobility would make it a poor choice for a character.

; InstallShield Wizard
: A ''wizard'' is a type of UI that simplifies configuration of an app or process by guiding the user through a number of screens in sequence. A user makes one decision on each screen, and the overall process puts less cognitive load on the user.
: {{w|InstallShield}} is a proprietary software tool for creating installer applications (or software packages) for Microsoft Windows. When the created package is being installed, the installer application can be shown in form of a 'standard Windows Wizard' dialog. Depending on the creativity of the user creating the package, the Wizard can display images while different stages of the installer are being executed.
: There are known instances of The InstallShield Wizard showing a wizard-like character images. Also, the standard wording of the installer text shown to the user ('software-to-be-installed is preparing the InstallShield Wizard, which will guide you through the program setup process') suggests that the Wizard is a 'real character'.

; Mr. Clean
: {{w|Mr. Clean}} is a brand and mascot for {{w|Procter & Gamble}} used for all-purpose cleaners and melamine foam cleaners.

; Comet Cursor
: {{w|Comet Cursor}} was Windows software that allowed users or websites to customise the mouse cursor. It was often installed with minimal user interaction and was accused of tracking users and being "spyware".

; Beto O'Rourke
: {{w|Beto O'Rourke}} is an American politician and businessman serving as the U.S. Representative for Texas's 16th congressional district since 2013. He was the nominee of the Democratic Party in the 2018 Texas U.S. Senate election (which was held the day before this comic appeared), running against Republican incumbent Ted Cruz. O'Rourke received much media attention leading up to the election, with many considering the election abnormally competitive. He ultimately did lose against Ted Cruz.
: While not a video game character, it is more than possible to create a Mii Fighter based on Beto O'Rourke in the game. However, the game does not come with a Beto O'Rourke Mii, and Nintendo has not created an official Mii of Beto O'Rourke.

; The Monopoly boot
: The "boot" is one of the classic pewter tokens from the board game ''{{w|Monopoly (game)|Monopoly}}''. Despite the absurdity of the request, the boot appeared in the 1999 ''Monopoly'' video game adaptation for the Nintendo 64. In 2017, the boot token was retired from the standard version of ''Monopoly''.

; Lot's wife
: Lot and his wife are characters from the book of Genesis in the Bible. According to the book of Genesis, Lot and his family had to {{w|Sodom_and_Gomorrah#In_the_Book_of_Genesis|flee the city of Sodom}}, which was being judged by God for its wickedness. They were commanded to flee and not look back at the city. However, Lot's wife looked back at the city and was turned into a pillar of salt. It is unclear which version of Lot's wife Randall wishes to be playable in the game.

; D.B. Cooper
: {{w|D.B. Cooper}} is the name popularly used to refer to an unidentified man who hijacked a Boeing 727 aircraft on November 24, 1971. He extorted $200,000 in ransom and parachuted out of the plane. His identity and whereabouts have never been discovered. D.B. Cooper was a subject of the [[1400: D.B. Cooper]] comic. As mentioned above, an enterprising player could easily make a Mii Fighter based on D.B. Cooper, though no such Mii has been provided by Nintendo.

; The Blair Witch
: The Blair Witch is the titular character of the ''{{w|The Blair Witch Project}}'', a 1999 "found footage" supernatural horror film. The film became one of the most successful independent films of all time. The witch is never actually shown in the film, making it difficult to turn into a character in the game.

; Mavis Beacon
: ''{{w|Mavis Beacon (character)|Mavis Beacon}}'' is a fictional character and the mascot of the ''{{w|Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing}}'' software series.

The title text refers to two US Supreme Court Associate Justices who were considered as additions to ''Smash''. {{w|Ruth Bader Ginsburg}} was appointed by Bill Clinton; {{w|Elena Kagan}} was appointed by Barack Obama. Both are considered to be on the "liberal" wing of the court, but Ginsburg’s forceful dissenting opinions may explain why she would have been a more popular character for Super Smash Bros. Additionally, Ginsburg has been parodied on ''{{w|Saturday Night Live}}'', adding to her popularity: [http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/cast/kate-mckinnon-15056/impersonation/ruth-bader-ginsburg-100221]

==Transcript==
:[In a frame a bullet-list is shown:]
:Mario/Luigi hybrid
:The SkiFree monster
:Siri
:Ellie from ''Up''
:Zordon
:Clippy
:The Sarlaac
:The InstallShield Wizard
:Mr. Clean
:Comet Cursor
:Beto O'Rourke
:The Monopoly boot
:Lot's wife
:D.B. Cooper
:The Blair Witch
:Mavis Beacon

:[Caption below the frame:]
:Super Smash Brothers never did end up adding anyone from my wishlist.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Video games]]

2069: Wishlist

2020-10-13T20:29:23Z

172.69.42.44: /* Explanation */ Just adding steve :-)

{{comic
| number = 2069
| date = November 7, 2018
| title = Wishlist
| image = wishlist.png
| titletext = Disappointed that they caved to fan pressure and went with Ruth Bader Ginsburg over Elena Kagan.
}}

==Explanation==
''{{w|Super Smash Brothers}}'' (also titled as ''Super Smash Bros.'' and usually shortened to ''Smash'') is a crossover fighting game series published by {{w|Nintendo}}, primarily featuring Nintendo characters. As of publish date, there are 77 playable characters across the 5 games in the series. Starting with the third game, ''Super Smash Bros. Brawl'', characters from third-party franchises (non-Nintendo) have been made available, though most of them had at least made major appearances on a Nintendo system at some point. This comic is a parody of various fans' wishes for the roster of ''Super Smash Bros. Ultimate'', which was announced in 2018 along with multiple trailers revealing new characters to appear in the roster. In the November 1st trailer it was stated every new character in the launch version of the game had been announced, though with five more characters coming in 2019 as {{w|downloadable content}}.

Throughout the series fans have suggested new characters to add; however, developer acquiescence to these requests is rare, with only five characters out of 77 ({{w|King Dedede}}, Steve, {{w|Sonic the Hedgehog}}, {{w|Ryu (Street Fighter)|Ryu}}, {{w|Bayonetta (character)|Bayonetta}}, and {{w|Ridley (Metroid)|Ridley}}) having been added this way. On November 3, the developer studio {{w|Sora Ltd.}} made a statement on Twitter telling fans that the unrevealed DLC characters were finalized and they were not accepting further requests.

This comic lists 16 "characters" that Randall supposedly wishes were made available in ''Super Smash Bros.'', ranging from plausible playable characters, to the absurd.

; Mario / Luigi hybrid
: {{w|Mario}} and {{w|Luigi}} are characters in the ''{{w|Super Mario}}'' series, one of Nintendo's flagship franchises. They are both playable characters in the ''Super Smash Bros.'' series. A hybrid of these two characters would be quite interesting, even though such a concept does not exist within the Super Mario series. When considering how Mario and Luigi have evolved throughout the Smash series, one could argue that {{w|Dr. Mario}} is a hybrid of these two in terms of moveset.

; The SkiFree monster
: ''{{w|SkiFree}}'' is a computer game for Windows released in 1991. The player controls a skier trying to avoid obstacles. After the end of a full run, a {{w|Yeti|white furry monster}} appears, and tries to catch the player. The ''SkiFree'' monster was a subject of the [[667: SkiFree]] comic. Unlike most of the characters on this list, the ''SkiFree'' monster at least has had an appearance on a Nintendo system, as the game had a {{w|Game Boy Color}} port as part of the "The Best of Entertainment Pack" in 2001.

; Siri
: {{w|Siri}} is the name given to Apple's personal virtual assistant for iOS, macOS, and its other operating systems. Siri is generally a voice without a visual representation, so it is unclear how Siri would be a playable character in ''Super Smash Bros.''

; Ellie from ''Up''
: Ellie is one of the characters in ''{{w|Up (2009 film)|Up}}'', a 2009 {{w|Pixar}} film. In the beginning of the film, Ellie passes away, leaving her husband Carl alone, and leading him to start his adventure in Paradise Falls. While there was a {{w|Up (video game)|tie-in video game based on the movie}} released in the same year for multiple systems (including the Wii and Nintendo DS), Ellie was not playable in it.

; Zordon
: {{w|Zordon}} is a fictional character from the ''Power Rangers'' franchise who serves as the mentor for the earlier Ranger teams. While he is technically trapped in another dimension, he is usually depicted as a blurry head in a tube. He occasionally has lightning powers, and had a robot sidekick (Alpha 5) who might be able to move him around. Alas, he is currently dead, having used his life energy to remove all evil from the galaxy at that time. While there have been many Power Rangers video games over the years, including on Nintendo platforms, Zordon would be an unlikely character not only due to his lack of extremities, but also due to the fact that the Power Rangers franchise is primarily built on stock footage of the Japanese ''Super Sentai'' series.

; Clippy
: Clippit, commonly nicknamed {{w|Clippy}}, was one of the Office Assistants for {{w|Microsoft Office}} (versions 1997 to 2003). It was an user interface with the purpose to assist users. Clippy (and the other Office Assistants) was negatively received by users, and was eventually removed in Office 2007.

; The Sarlaac [sic]
: The {{w|Sarlacc}} is an alien monster that lived in {{w|Tatooine}} in the ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' universe. It is most prominently shown in the film ''{{w|Return of the Jedi}}'', when the main heroes are sentenced to death by being dropped into the Sarlacc's mouth. Notably, the Sarlacc is a large, stationary creature embedded in the ground (essentially, a pit).
: This could be a reference to the {{w|List_of_recurring_Mario_franchise_enemies#Piranha_Plant|Piranha Plant}} being confirmed as a DLC character, as Piranha Plants are typically stationary and embedded in the ground, and also have their big, toothy mouth as a primary feature.
: While the Sarlacc was featured in 1994's ''{{w|Super Star Wars: Return of the Jedi}}'' for the {{w|Super Nintendo Entertainment System}}, its lack of mobility would make it a poor choice for a character.

; InstallShield Wizard
: A ''wizard'' is a type of UI that simplifies configuration of an app or process by guiding the user through a number of screens in sequence. A user makes one decision on each screen, and the overall process puts less cognitive load on the user.
: {{w|InstallShield}} is a proprietary software tool for creating installer applications (or software packages) for Microsoft Windows. When the created package is being installed, the installer application can be shown in form of a 'standard Windows Wizard' dialog. Depending on the creativity of the user creating the package, the Wizard can display images while different stages of the installer are being executed.
: There are known instances of The InstallShield Wizard showing a wizard-like character images. Also, the standard wording of the installer text shown to the user ('software-to-be-installed is preparing the InstallShield Wizard, which will guide you through the program setup process') suggests that the Wizard is a 'real character'.

; Mr. Clean
: {{w|Mr. Clean}} is a brand and mascot for {{w|Procter & Gamble}} used for all-purpose cleaners and melamine foam cleaners.

; Comet Cursor
: {{w|Comet Cursor}} was Windows software that allowed users or websites to customise the mouse cursor. It was often installed with minimal user interaction and was accused of tracking users and being "spyware".

; Beto O'Rourke
: {{w|Beto O'Rourke}} is an American politician and businessman serving as the U.S. Representative for Texas's 16th congressional district since 2013. He was the nominee of the Democratic Party in the 2018 Texas U.S. Senate election (which was held the day before this comic appeared), running against Republican incumbent Ted Cruz. O'Rourke received much media attention leading up to the election, with many considering the election abnormally competitive. He ultimately did lose against Ted Cruz.
: While not a video game character, it is more than possible to create a Mii Fighter based on Beto O'Rourke in the game. However, the game does not come with a Beto O'Rourke Mii, and Nintendo has not created an official Mii of Beto O'Rourke.

; The Monopoly boot
: The "boot" is one of the classic pewter tokens from the board game ''{{w|Monopoly (game)|Monopoly}}''. Despite the absurdity of the request, the boot appeared in the 1999 ''Monopoly'' video game adaptation for the Nintendo 64. In 2017, the boot token was retired from the standard version of ''Monopoly''.

; Lot's wife
: Lot and his wife are characters from the book of Genesis in the Bible. According to the book of Genesis, Lot and his family had to {{w|Sodom_and_Gomorrah#In_the_Book_of_Genesis|flee the city of Sodom}}, which was being judged by God for its wickedness. They were commanded to flee and not look back at the city. However, Lot's wife looked back at the city and was turned into a pillar of salt. It is unclear which version of Lot's wife Randall wishes to be playable in the game.

; D.B. Cooper
: {{w|D.B. Cooper}} is the name popularly used to refer to an unidentified man who hijacked a Boeing 727 aircraft on November 24, 1971. He extorted $200,000 in ransom and parachuted out of the plane. His identity and whereabouts have never been discovered. D.B. Cooper was a subject of the [[1400: D.B. Cooper]] comic. As mentioned above, an enterprising player could easily make a Mii Fighter based on D.B. Cooper, though no such Mii has been provided by Nintendo.

; The Blair Witch
: The Blair Witch is the titular character of the ''{{w|The Blair Witch Project}}'', a 1999 "found footage" supernatural horror film. The film became one of the most successful independent films of all time. The witch is never actually shown in the film, making it difficult to turn into a character in the game.

; Mavis Beacon
: ''{{w|Mavis Beacon (character)|Mavis Beacon}}'' is a fictional character and the mascot of the ''{{w|Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing}}'' software series.

The title text refers to two US Supreme Court Associate Justices who were considered as additions to ''Smash''. {{w|Ruth Bader Ginsburg}} was appointed by Bill Clinton; {{w|Elena Kagan}} was appointed by Barack Obama. Both are considered to be on the "liberal" wing of the court, but Ginsburg’s forceful dissenting opinions may explain why she would have been a more popular character for Super Smash Bros. Additionally, Ginsburg has been parodied on ''{{w|Saturday Night Live}}'', adding to her popularity: [http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/cast/kate-mckinnon-15056/impersonation/ruth-bader-ginsburg-100221]

==Transcript==
:[In a frame a bullet-list is shown:]
:Mario/Luigi hybrid
:The SkiFree monster
:Siri
:Ellie from ''Up''
:Zordon
:Clippy
:The Sarlaac
:The InstallShield Wizard
:Mr. Clean
:Comet Cursor
:Beto O'Rourke
:The Monopoly boot
:Lot's wife
:D.B. Cooper
:The Blair Witch
:Mavis Beacon

:[Caption below the frame:]
:Super Smash Brothers never did end up adding anyone from my wishlist.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Video games]]

Talk:415: Restraining Order

2020-10-02T03:09:24Z

172.69.42.44:

Looks like something [[Danish]] would do, not Ponytail.Classhole 00:31, 14 February 2013 (UTC)
:Therein lies the problem with presuming "Ponytail" is a singular, consistent character, which she isn't, and never has been. It's kind of ridiculous to say something is out of character for Ponytails, Megans, or Cueballs (and probably White Hat), since they're rarely the same person.[[User:Pennpenn|Pennpenn]] ([[User talk:Pennpenn|talk]]) 02:02, 26 February 2014 (UTC)

Is "iconic" meant to be "ironic"? It is also not ironic, unless if the restraining order forces Cueball to be within 1 yard of Ponytail at all times which defeats the general purpose of a restraining order. [[User:Flewk|flewk]] ([[User talk:Flewk|talk]]) 12:08, 28 December 2015 (UTC)

Is this even legally possible? [[User:Prongs95|Prongs95]] ([[User talk:Prongs95|talk]]) 15:10, 22 February 2016 (UTC)

This is certainly not possible, just think of how much trouble it would cause.[[User:Dontknow|Dontknow]] ([[User talk:Dontknow|talk]]) 00:28, 8 March 2017 (UTC)

It's not *that* bad if Cueball is massive enough. But stuff gets really weird if Cueball's de Broglie wavelength is on the order of 100 yards... --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.54.4|172.68.54.4]] 16:20, 26 April 2017 (UTC)
:I need another explain page for the comments. [[User:Netherin5|“That Guy from the Netherlands”]] ([[User talk:Netherin5|talk]]) 15:58, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

The Steven Wright line comes to mind about seeing a girl and wondering if there were an opposite to a restraining order.

I feel as if one could theoretically enforce a maximum distance. For example, if you had a restraining order (minimum distance) on your target and they were imprisoned and released on bail, they could not the leave the state, giving us our maximum distance. From there, especially in a tiny state like Rhode Island, you could slowly corner them in. Especially if this were to occur on a pennisula, they would be trapped, helpless to move except at your whim.

On the surface of a sphere, all distances are modulo the circumference of the sphere, so a minimum distance ''d'' is equivalent to a maximum distance ''circumference - d''. If ''d'' was large enough, it would imply a maximum distance even accounting for irregularities of the earth's surface, or one of the persons going on the ISS. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.154.35|162.158.154.35]] 00:55, 27 September 2020 (UTC)

This one is kind of like [[390]]. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.42.44|172.69.42.44]] 03:09, 2 October 2020 (UTC)

1799: Bad Map Projection: Time Zones

2020-09-25T00:48:56Z

172.69.42.44: Added descriptions for United States, Antilles and the Central American countries.

{{comic
| number = 1799
| date = February 15, 2017
| title = Bad Map Projection: Time Zones
| image = bad_map_projection_time_zones.png
| titletext = This is probably the first projection in cartographic history that can be criticized for its disproportionate focus on Finland, Mongolia, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo.
}}
A [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/bad_map_projection_time_zones_2x.png double sized version] of this image can be found by clicking the image at the comic on xkcd.com.

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|[[#Table of countries and their time zones|Table]] now has all relevant countries and is sortable. But needs to be filled out for each country with explanation of its time zone and why it looks as it does on the map. (Especially those from title text needs explanation like that). Some of the info already given in the explanation could be moved to the table.}}

This comic shows a {{w|Map projection|map projection}} in which countries are placed according to the {{w|Time zone|time zones}} that they fall under. This is thus the second comic in the series of [[:Category:Bad Map Projections|Bad Map Projections]] and it seems that [[Randall]], being Randall, runs with the idea as he has made yet another map projection that is not only inaccurate, but utterly unusable, though less so than the previous one.

The first was released just over a month before this one and was called [[1784: Bad Map Projection: Liquid Resize]]. "Liquid Resize" was #107, while this comic features #79. Since the ''liquid resize'' was purely aesthetic, whereas this one at least conveys some meaningful information it makes sense that this projection is ranked higher.

Conceptually, the series is a comment on the fact that there is no perfect way to draw a map of the world on a flat piece of paper. Each one will introduce a different type of distortion, and the best projection for a given situation is sometimes very disputed. Randall previously explored 12 different projections in [[977: Map Projections]], and expressed his disdain for some types he sees as less efficient but whose users feel superior. None of them are really good as any 2D map projection will always distort in a way the spherical reality, and a map projection that is useful for one aspect (like navigation, geographical shapes and masses visualization, etc.) will not be so for all the others. Local maps of smaller areas can be quite accurate, but the idea of both these map projection comics is to map the entire globe on a flat surface.

Time zones are based on the way the Sun shines on the Earth, so these time zones, which are based on the sun's position in the sky, would best be divided by roughly longitudinal (North-to-South Pole) lines. However, this is not the case in practice, as the defined time zones tend to have very jagged boundaries, and furthermore some countries use a completely different time than the zones they are in, at least for some parts (see {{w|China}}). Since Randall knows he cannot fix the boundaries of the time zones, he instead "fixes" the world by making a map appear to match up with the time zone system, as shown in [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/1/1f/1799_Map_with_Labeled_time_zones.PNG this map], also posted in the [[#Map with Labeled time zones|trivia]]. This results in bizarre distortions such as the large, gum-like strands of {{w|Greenland}} (these are the towns of {{w|Danmarkshavn}} (UTC) and {{w|Ittoqqortoormiit}} (UTC-1), which use different time zones to the rest of the island) and three enormous gulfs in {{w|Russia}} (there is no oblast in Russia using those time zones, hence the giant gap). See also [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/5/5b/1799_overlay.png this map] with a [[#Time zone map overlayed the comic|time zone map overlayed the comic]].

The effect of this map is to "punish" large countries with a single time zone - for instance, China, which uses UTC+8 across the whole country - and countries that share large time zones - for instance, almost all of {{w|Europe}} is packed into the Central European UTC+1 zone - by shrinking these down. Conversely, countries that use multiple time zones without filling them out are stretched out - for example, the {{w|Democratic Republic of the Congo}} (DRC) and {{w|Mongolia}}, as pointed out in the title text - as are slim countries that do not fill out the full width of their time zones but where their neighbors use different timezones so they have to fill the entire width of their time zone. For instance {{w|Finland}} (also mentioned in the title text) and the {{w|Baltic countries}}, who look huge because their western and eastern neighbors do not use the UTC+2 Eastern Europe time, and thus have to fill out the distance between the countries that are pushed to the zones on their east/west borders.

Other map projections distort countries this way as well, but based on their actual physical location as opposed to their position on imaginary time zones. The {{w|Mercator projection}} is infamous for distorting Greenland in this way, to the point that it appears to be larger than {{w|Africa}} despite being nowhere near the same size.

See the [[#Table of countries and their time zones|table]] below for lots more information on the comic, but here are some further details.

===Map imperfections===
The map is imperfect for several reasons:

Randall attempts to preserve adjacency where possible - for instance, Chad and Sudan are neighbors even though Chad uses West Africa Time (UTC+1) and Sudan uses East Africa Time (UTC+3). Randall draws an extremely thin strand connecting the countries through Central/South Africa Time (UTC+2), even though no part of Chad or Sudan uses this time. Similarly, a thin strand of Kazakhstan and Turkmenistan is shown projecting into the UTC+4 time zone in order to separate Russia and Iran, which do not really share a border. Worst of all is China, which has to have borders to several countries that do not share the single eastern time zone of east China, which the whole China is forced to use. A thin strand, resembling the {{w|Yangtze}} river, is shown passing through time zones that China does not use. This is the most complicated preservation of adjacency shown in the map.

There is no mention of daylight saving time - all countries shown are given the base winter time. Depending on the time of year, countries will shift around - around June, many northern hemisphere countries will move east, while some southern hemisphere countries will move east around December.

The map doesn't allow for half-hour time zones. (India, for instance, is on UTC+5.5) Instead, countries that use fractional time zones are shifted so they straddle the two time zones, and are then marked with an asterisk (*). This is also true of regions within countries, including the island of Newfoundland in Canada and a section in the center of Australia.

The only extra detail mentioned in the map is also for Australia. It is the {{w|UTC%2B08:45|UTC+8:45}} time zone that is used only by 5 roadhouses covering a population of only a few hundred people.

There are several errors in the map, see [[#Errors|below]].

===Table of countries and their time zones===
This sortable table includes all countries shown in the map, not just those are labeled, as well as the continents and some other regions are mentioned.

The countries or continents are mentioned approximately in reading order. If a country is not labeled with full name the abbreviation is in brackets behind the name. If the country is not labeled, labeled wrong or not even shown in the comic, there is a note after the name. Countries labeled with a footnote by an asterisk (*) are shown together with that asterisk at the name.

If a country has more than one time zone all are listed.

====Table====
{| class="wikitable sortable"
! Country/Continent
! Time zone(s)
! Distortions
! Explanation
|-
| {{w|North America}} (not labeled) || UTC-9 – UTC-3:30 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Canada}} || UTC-8 – UTC-3:30 || West coast is flattened, and the east coast is stretched out. ||
*Canada has two main distortions:
** The west coast is on UTC-8 time, and shares a border with Alaska, which is UTC-9. In this map, the border is much further east than the real border and is straightened out. While the border between the Yukon Territory and Alaska is mostly straight at 141°W, the division between the time zones are at 127.5°W; and the border between British Colombia and Alaska is not straight.
** On the east coast is the island of Newfoundland at UTC-3:30, which is marked with an asterisk; in the map it is depicted more eastward due to the extra half-hour difference. Also, the southeastern tip of Labrador shares the UTC-3:30 time zone, though not marked with an asterisk, it is stretched out to line up with the island of Newfoundland.
|-
| {{w|United States}} || UTC+10, UTC+12, UTC-12 – UTC-4 || Alaska appears thinner than usual, and Texas' coast has been smushed. || Usage of time zones in U.S. territories is {{w|Time_in_the_United_States|complicated}}. The contiguous United States use times zones from UTC-5 (East Coast) to UTC-8 (West Coast), the State of {{w|Alaska}} uses UTC-9, and {{w|Puerto Rico}} uses UTC-4. These are the only parts shown on Randall's map. Other territories, not shown on the map, use the following time zones:
* {{w|United States Virgin Islands}} use UTC-4.
* {{w|Navassa Island}} and the disputed {{w|Bajo Nuevo Bank}} and {{w|Serranilla Bank}} use UTC-5.
* The State of {{w|Hawaii}}, most of the {{w|Aleutian Islands}} and {{w|Johnston Atoll}} use UTC-10.
* {{w|Jarvis Island}}, {{w|Midway Atoll}}, {{w|Palmyra Atoll}} and {{w|Kingman Reef}} all use UTC-11.
* {{w|Baker Island}} and {{w|Howland Island}} use UTC-12.
* {{w|Wake Island}} uses UTC+12.
* {{w|Guam}} and the {{w|Northern Mariana Islands}} use UTC+10.
|-
| {{w|Mexico}} || UTC-8 – UTC-5 || Guadalajara and the Yucatan Peninsula are too far east || The east coast of the Yucatan Peninsula goes as far east as the Florida Keys here - this because the state of {{w|Quintana Roo}} is the only one to use UTC-5 (equivalent to US Eastern Time).
|-
| {{w|Antilles}} (not labeled) || UTC-5 – UTC-4 || No distortion. || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Cuba}} || UTC-5 || No distortion. ||
|-
| {{w|Haiti}} || UTC-5 || No distortion. ||
|-
| {{w|Jamaica}} (Jam.) || UTC-5 || No distortion.||
|-
| {{w|Dominican Republic}} (D.R.) || UTC-4 ||No distortion. ||
|-
| {{w|Guadeloupe}} (not labeled) || UTC-4 ||No distortion. || Not labeled. Tentatively identified as one of four dots in the Lesser Antilles region of Randall's map.
|-
| {{w|Dominica}} (not labeled) || UTC-4 ||No distortion. || Not labeled. Tentatively identified as one of four dots in the Lesser Antilles region of Randall's map.
|-
| {{w|Martinique}} (not labeled) || UTC-4 ||No distortion. || Not labeled. Tentatively identified as one of four dots in the Lesser Antilles region of Randall's map.
|-
| {{w|Saint Lucia}} (not labeled) || UTC-4 ||No distortion. || Not labeled. Tentatively identified as one of four dots in the Lesser Antilles region of Randall's map.
|-
| {{w|Trinidad and Tobago}} (not labeled) || UTC-4 ||No distortion. || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Central America}} (not labeled) || UTC-6 || Squashed together ||Not labeled. Apart from Panama, all Central American countries use the same time zone. This means Panama is stretched out, while the other countries are pushed back west of Florida.
|-
| {{w|Guatemala}} (Gua.) || UTC-6 || Stretched out. ||
|-
| {{w|Belize}} (not labeled) || UTC-6 || Greatly decreased in size, represented by only a few pixels. || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|El Salvador}} (not labeled) || UTC-6 || Greatly decreased in size, represented by only a few pixels. || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Honduras}} (Hon.) || UTC-6 || The left side is flattened and pushed inwards. ||
|-
| {{w|Nicaragua}} (Nic.) || UTC-6 || No distortion, other than that Lake Colcibolca is exaggerated for no apparent reason. ||
|-
| {{w|Costa Rica}} (C.R.) || UTC-6 || Flattened and decreased in size. ||
|-
| {{w|Panama}} (Pan.) || UTC-6 || Stretched out. ||
|-
| {{w|South America}} (not labeled) || UTC-5 – UTC-3 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Colombia}} || UTC-5 || ||
|-
| {{w|Venezuela}} || UTC-4 || ||
|-
| {{w|Guyana}} || UTC-4 || ||
|-
| {{w|French Guiana}} (labeled Suriname) || UTC-3 || || Labeled incorrectly.
|-
| {{w|Suriname}} (labeled F.G.) || UTC-3 || || Labeled incorrectly.
|-
| {{w|Ecuador}} (not labeled) || UTC-6 – UTC-5 || || Not labeled. UTC-6 is used only on {{w|Galápagos Islands}} (not shown).
|-
| {{w|Peru}} || UTC-5 || ||
|-
| {{w|Brazil}} || UTC-5 – UTC-3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Bolivia}} || UTC-4 || ||
|-
| {{w|Paraguay}} (Par.) || UTC-4 || ||
|-
| {{w|Chile}} || UTC-5, UTC-3 || || UTC-5 is used only on {{w|Easter Island}} (not shown).
|-
| {{w|Argentina}} || UTC-3 || ||This is stretched out vertically to fit the entire country into the UTC-3 timezone that it uses.
|-
| {{w|Uruguay}} || UTC-3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Europe}} (not labeled) || UTC-4 – UTC+4 || Compressed with the countries of central and western Europe pressed closer in east-west direction while eastern countries are stretched in all directions. Iceland is moved east. Greenland is stretched horizontally and got strange protruding peninsulas. || Not labeled. Europe uses mostly UTC+1, which causes severe distortion. Disproportionally smaller areas utilize UTC±0, UTC+2 and UTC+3. UTC-4, UTC-1 and UTC+4 are used only marginally. Greenland, even if it belongs to North America geographically, is counted here as well as it lies within the Denmark rule.

* UTC-4 is used solely in {{w|Thule Air Base}} in western Greenland.
* Only Greenland uses UTC-3, throughout most of its territory.
* UTC-2 is not used at all.
* {{w|Azores}}, being an autonomous region of Portugal, and a Greenland settlement of {{w|Ittoqqortoormiit}} observe UTC-1.
* The United Kingdom and Ireland both use UTC±0. {{w|Portugal}} is the only country in mainland Europe which uses UTC±0 as well – that's why it sticks out a bit towards the British Isles which share the time zone with Portugal. Greenland's settlement of {{w|Danmarkshavn}} uses UTC±0 as well, and {{w|Iceland}} is here, too.
* Most of Europe uses UTC+1 but these countries in reality spread over a much larger area than just one zone. This is why central and western countries are so compressed. {{w|Svalbard}} archipelago in the Arctic Ocean also belongs here.
* The eastern countries (except Belarus and the European part of Russia but not the Kaliningrad exclave) use UTC+2. These are: {{w|Finland}}, {{w|Latvia}}, {{w|Estonia}}, {{w|Lithuania}}, {{w|Belarus}}, {{w|Moldova}}, {{w|Ukraine}}, {{w|Bulgaria}}, {{w|Romania}}, {{w|Greece}} and {{w|Cyprus}}. In reality, they occupy a smaller area on the map, but on Randall's map they are stretched to fill the UTC+2 zone strip.
* Belarus, most of the European part of Russia and Crimea use UTC+3. See below for peculiarities regarding Russia and Ukraine.
* UTC+4 is used in Armenia, Azerbaijan, Georgia and some parts of Russia.

Finland looks specifically distorted, partly because in reality it borders with {{w|Norway}} on the north, and Norway uses UTC+1. On Randall's map Norway is compressed into UTC+1 strip and Finland suddenly got some coast on Barents Sea. Poland (abbreviated ''POL.'' on the map) and Belarus (''BEL'') have common border but differ by two time zones, Poland uses UTC+1 but Belarus uses UTC+3 (Moscow time). Therefore on the map they have protruding 'fingers', touching one another, squeezed between Lithuania and Latvia on the north and Ukraine on the south.

Randall got Turkey a bit wrong, however: its European part is stretched into UTC+2 zone, but in reality Turkey uses UTC+3 on its whole territory.
|-
| {{w|Greenland}}|| UTC-4 – UTC±0 || Two landmasses stretched from the rest of the country || Greenland stretches from UTC-4 to UTC±0 with most of the country being UTC-3. UTC-4 is only applicable to Thule Air Base in the southern part of the Hayes-Peninsula, while UTC-1 and UTC±0 are used in smaller areas on the east coast of Greenland. Even though UTC-2 is not used in Greenland at all, the country is depicted as a single landmass with two small strips of land connecting the UTC-1 and UTC±0 landmasses. These two strips should be considered infinitesimally thin but depicted to clarify the two areas are not separate islands but connected with the rest of Greenland.
|-
| {{w|Iceland}} || UTC±0 || No shape distortions, but different location. || Iceland, even if it geographically lies mostly within the UTC-1 time zone, uses UTC±0. It is therefore moved east on Randall's map.
|-
| {{w|Norway}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Sweden}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Finland}} || UTC+2 || Stretched horizontally because it borders Norway on the north, which uses UTC+1. ||
|-
| {{w|Ireland}} || UTC±0 || None. || Ireland uses UTC±0 as the rest of British Isles.
|-
| {{w|United Kingdom}} (UK) || UTC±0 || None. || The country is fully within the single time zone used for the country. UK defined the time zones so their time zone is by definition the one with UTC±0 (or GMT).
|-
| {{w|Denmark}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Lithuania}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Latvia}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Estonia}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Belarus}} (Bel.) || UTC+3 || || Belarus lies entirely in the UTC+3 time zone yet the map depicts a small strip of land in the UTC+2 zone. This is most likely to allow for Belarus to have a common border with Poland even though the countries do not have two consecutive time zones (Poland uses UTC+1)
|-
| {{w|Russia}} (First label) || UTC+2 – UTC+12 || || See Asia section for explanation. It is the only country labeled twice.
|-
| {{w|Netherlands}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Belgium}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Germany}} (Ger.) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Poland}} (Pol.) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Ukraine}} || UTC+2 (UTC+3 in disputed regions) || Crimea stretched away from the rest of the country. || Since the {{w|annexation of Crimea by the Russian Federation}}, the peninsula has used Moscow time (UTC+3). The sovereignty of Crimea is disputed, but it is currently ''de facto'' controlled by Russia, and Randall colors it like Russia. Two breakaway provinces in the east, Donetsk and Luhansk, also use Moscow time. These are not shown.
|-
| {{w|France}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Switzerland}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Austria}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Czech Republic}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Slovakia}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Slovenia}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Hungary}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Italy}} (It.) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Romania}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Moldova}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Portugal}} || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Spain}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Croatia}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Bosnia and Herzegovina}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Serbia}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Montenegro}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Albania}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Macedonia}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Bulgaria}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Greece}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Cyprus}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Georgia}} (not labeled) || UTC+4 || Squashed into thin horizontal strip. Merged with Azerbaijan. || Not labeled. Georgia uses UTC+4 but has coast on the {{w|Black Sea}} which on Randall's map is shown entirely within UTC+2 and UTC+3 zones. Therefore Georgia is depicted as a thin strip touching the Black Sea squashed between Russia and Turkey and the main part is shown as a slightly wider blob in the east supposedly lying in the UTC+4 strip. However in the process Georgia got some coast on the {{w|Caspian Sea}} in the place {{w|Azerbaijan}} shall be located, including the {{w|Absheron Peninsula}} with the Azerbaijani capital, {{w|Baku}}.
|-
| {{w|Azerbaijan}} (not labeled) || UTC+4 || Heavily shrunk, displaced south. || Not labeled. Most or all of the Azerbaijani territory including its capital area is mistakenly attributed to Georgia, see above. In reality, Azerbaijan is the only country with coast on the Caspian Sea between Russia and Iran. However, in the Randall's map there are two tiny patches touching the Caspian Sea just north of Iran. The northern one can be tentatively identified as Azerbaijan.
|-
| {{w|Armenia}} (not labeled) || UTC+4 || Displaced east to Caspian Sea coast. || Not labeled. A tiny patch of land on the Caspian Sea coast just north of Iran can be tentatively identified as Armenia. However, Armenia ia a landlocked country in reality.
|-
| {{w|Africa}} (not labeled) || UTC±0 – UTC+3 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Western Sahara}} (labeled Morocco) || UTC±0 || || Labeled incorrectly.
|-
| {{w|Tunisia}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Morocco}} (labeled W.S.) || UTC±0 || || Labeled incorrectly.
|-
| {{w|Algeria}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Mauritania}} || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Senegal}} (Sen.) || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Gambia}} (not labeled) || UTC±0 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Mali}} || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Niger}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Libya}} || UTC+2 || Stretched vertically | Nations located to the south of Libya tend to use either UTC+1 (Chad) or UTC+3 (Sudan), but not UTC+2, which Libya uses. In order to fill in this area, Libya, one of the few countries in the area which uses the intermediate UTC+2, has been used to demonstrate the two-hour gap. ||
|-
| {{w|Egypt}} || UTC+2 || Stretched vertically | Egypt uses the UTC+2 time zone, while most countries located to its south use UTC+3. Since the area of central Africa using UTC+2 is small compared to the section using UTC+3, those countries in UTC+2 are extended to cover more of that time zone. ||
|-
| {{w|Sudan}} || UTC+3 || Sudan and South Sudan (S.S.) are fully in UTC+3 zone, but in the map a little part of them has been stretched to meet the borders with Chad the Central African Republic which are in UTC+1. ||
|-
| {{w|South Sudan}} (S.S.) || UTC+3 || || See Sudan’s explanation.
|-
| {{w|Eritrea}} (not labeled) || UTC+3 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Guinea-Bissau}} (GB.) || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Guinea}} (Guin.) || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Burkina Faso}} (B.F.) || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Sierra Leone}} (S.L.) || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Liberia}} || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Côte d'Ivoire}} || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Ghana}} || UTC±0 || ||
|-
| {{w|Togo}} (not labeled) || UTC±0 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Benin}} (not labeled) || UTC+1 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Nigeria}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Chad}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Cameroon}} (Cam.) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Central African Republic}} (C.A.R.) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Ethiopia}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Somalia}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Equatorial Guinea}} (E.G.) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Gabon}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Republic of the Congo}} (R. of Congo) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Democratic Republic of the Congo}} (Dem. Rep. of the Congo) || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Rwanda}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Burundi}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Uganda}} (not labeled) || UTC+3 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Kenya}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Angola}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Zambia}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Malawi}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Tanzania}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Namibia}} || UTC+1 || ||
|-
| {{w|Botswana}} (Bots.) || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Zimbabwe}} (Zimb.) || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Mozambique}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Madagascar}} || UTC+3 || None. || Madagascar has the correct shape and position.
|-
| {{w|South Africa}} || UTC+2 || ||
|-
| {{w|Lesotho}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Swaziland}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Asia}} (not labeled) || UTC+3 – UTC+12 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Turkey}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Lebanon}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Syria}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Iraq}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Iran}}* || UTC+3:30 ||Is a bit inflated in the northeast corner. ||
|-
| {{w|Israel}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Jordan}} (not labeled) || UTC+2 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Saudi Arabia}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Kuwait}} (not labeled) || UTC+3 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Qatar}} (not labeled) || UTC+3 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|United Arab Emirates}} (not labeled) || UTC+4 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Yemen}} || UTC+3 || ||
|-
| {{w|Oman}} || UTC+4 || ||
|-
| {{w|Russia}} (2nd label) || UTC+2 – UTC+12 || Three deep troughs almost cutting Russia into pieces, but not quite, also eastern parts stick out of proportion relative to Eastern Asian countries. || Only country with two labels. Russia has {{w|Time_in_Russia|a peculiar}} usage of time zones, therefore it is the most distorted country on Randall's map. It covers eleven time zones but uses them very unevenly. Each of {{w|Federal subjects of Russia|constituent entities}} of Russia (also called federal subjects) uses a specific time zone throughout its territory, the only exception being Yakutia, the largest administrative subdivision, which spans three time zones. The time zone assignments are quite arbitrary, however.
* UTC+2 ({{w|Kaliningrad_Time|MSK-1}}) is used in {{w|Kaliningrad Oblast}} only, an {{w|exclave}} on {{w|Baltic Sea}} between {{w|Poland}} and {{w|Lithuania}}. On Randall's map it can be seen as a small green patch north-east of Poland.
* UTC+3 ({{w|Moscow_Time|MSK+0}}) is used throughout most of the European part of Russia including Northern Caucasian republics, covering 49 constituent entities of the Russian Federation in total. These parts make up the easternmost mass of Russia on Randall's map, stretching from the {{w|Black Sea}} in the south including the area between the Black Sea and {{w|Caspian Sea}} to the {{w|White Sea|White}}, {{w|Barents Sea|Barents}} and {{w|Kara Sea|Kara}} seas in the north and includes the arctic archipelagoes of {{w|Novaya Zemlya}} and {{w|Franz Josef Land}} as seen in the upper part of the map.
* UTC+4 ({{w|Samara_Time|MSK+1}}) is used in {{w|Udmurtia}}, {{w|Astrakhan Oblast}}, {{w|Samara Oblast}}, {{w|Saratov Oblast}} and {{w|Ulyanovsk Oblast}}, forming three disjoint areas lying more or less along the Ural mountains on their western side. Astrakhan Oblast has coast on the Caspian Sea. Saratov and Samara oblasts have a common border and lie somewhat to the north-east of Astrakhan Oblast. Udmurtia lies still somewhat to the north. On Randal's map they are represented by a patch of land north-east to the Caspian Sea. Further north there's a huge 'bay' reflecting the time-gap between northern parts of Russia that use either UTC+3 or UTC+5 but not UTC+4, even if they are adjacent to each other.
* UTC+5 ({{w|Yekaterinburg_Time|MSK+2}}) is used by the administrative subdivisions lying on and close to {{w|Ural mountains}}, both on western and eastern sides of them, also covering major part of {{w|West_Siberian_Plain|Western Siberia}}. These include {{w|Bashkortostan}}, {{w|Perm Krai}}, {{w|Kurgan Oblast}}, {{w|Orenburg Oblast}}, {{w|Sverdlovsk Oblast}}, {{w|Tyumen Oblast}}, {{w|Chelyabinsk Oblast}}, {{w|Khanty-Mansi Autonomous Okrug}} and {{w|Yamalo-Nenets Autonomous Okrug}}. The lands are represented on the Randall's map by the second-from-the-left major land mass within Russia. These parts border mostly with areas utilizing either UTC+3 or UTC+7, therefore Randall has drawn huge patches of sea on both sides. In the north, one can recognize somewhat distorted shapes of the {{w|Yamal Peninsula|Yamal}} and {{w|Gydan_Peninsula|Gydan}} peninsulas.
* UTC+6 ({{w|Omsk_Time|MSK+3}}) is used solely in the {{w|Omsk Oblast}} in the southeastern {{w|Siberia}}, bordering {{w|Kazakhstan}}. On Randall's map it is shown as a strip of land joining the second and the third land mass from the left, just to the left of the ''RUSSIA'' inscription. However, taking into account the relatively small area of the Omsk Oblast, it should have been much thinner.
* UTC+7 ({{w|Krasnoyarsk_Time|MSK+4}}) is used in federal subjects located in the central and parts of eastern and western Siberia: {{w|Altai Republic}}, {{w|Tuva}} Republic, Republic of {{w|Khakassia}}, {{w|Altai Krai}}, {{w|Krasnoyarsk Krai}}, {{w|Kemerovo Oblast}}, {{w|Novosibirsk Oblast}} and {{w|Tomsk Oblast}}. These lands border mostly with areas using non-adjacent time zones, namely UTC+5 and UTC+9, and therefore form the tallest pillar on the Randall's depiction of Russia between two large seas. This part of Randall's Russia also has a strange thin strip of land going south and touching China's tendril just between Kazakhstan and {{w|Mongolia}} – this is to represent the fact that there is a short length of Russian-Chinese border there. The rest of the border is depicted elsewhere, see below. {{w|Taymyr Peninsula}} and {{w|Severnaya Zemlya}} archipelago can be seen atop that area of the map.
* UTC+8 ({{w|Irkutsk_Time|MSK+5}}) is used in {{w|Buryatia}} and {{w|Irkutsk Oblast}} only, which lie in eastern Siberia, on both sides of {{w|Lake Baikal}} (not shown on the map). This is represented by a patch located just northwest of a protruding fragment of China, which shares the time zone with these parts; however neither Buryatia nor Irkutsk Oblast border with China.
* UTC+9 ({{w|Yakutsk_Time|MSK+6}}) is used in {{w|Amur Oblast}}, {{w|Zabaykalsky Krai}} and in most of Yakutia also known as the {{w|Sakha Republic}}. On Randall's map this time zone is joined together with the remaining three eastern time zones forming a strange shape connected to the rest of Asia with a weird-looking isthmus. This is actually the part of Russia that has the longest part of the border with China along the {{w|Amur River}}, but here it is torn away because of the strange map 'projection'. {{w|New Siberian Islands}} are depicted in the far north.
* UTC+10 ({{w|Vladivostok_Time|MSK+7}}) is used in north-eastern parts of Yakutia, {{w|Jewish Autonomous Oblast}}, {{w|Khabarovsk Krai}} and {{w|Primorsky Krai}}. In reality these parts (except Yakutia) all border with China, all the way down to North Korea. On Randall's depiction they are torn away from Chinese border to represent time zone difference. The strange hook is the southernmost part of Primorsky Krai with the big haven of {{w|Vladivostok}}, the tip of the hook shall actually touch North Korea in reality.
* UTC+11 ({{w|Magadan_Time|MSK+8}}) is used in extreme north-eastern parts of Yakutia, {{w|Magadan Oblast}} and {{w|Sakhalin Oblast}}. The {{w|Sakhalin}} island is clearly recognizable in this strip of the map, but it is far removed from {{w|Japan}} which lies next to it in reality. The shape of the {{w|Sea of Okhotsk}} is somewhat recognizable, and the location of {{w|Magadan}} is clearly seen as a small hook on the shoreline near Kamchatka.
* UTC+12 ({{w|Kamchatka_Time|MSK+9}}) is used in {{w|Kamchatka Krai}} and {{w|Chukotka Autonomous Okrug}}. This is probably the least distorted part of Russia, the characteristic shapes of {{w|Kamchatka_Peninsula|Kamchatka}} and {{w|Chukchi_Peninsula|Chukchi}} peninsulas are totally recognizable.

A notable thing is that Russian railways use Moscow time (UTC+3) exclusively, all timetables are expressed in this time, even in the most remote eastern parts of Russia. You'd better know your local time zone while awaiting your train at the station.
|-
| {{w|Kazakhstan}} || UTC+5 – UTC+6 || Vertically: stretched in eastern part, squeezed in western part. Horizontally: squeezed in eastern part, stretched in western part|| UTC+5 is used in the smaller western part and UTC+6 in the larger eastern part. The division goes more or less along the 60th meridian. On Randall's map Kazakhstan's shape is heavily distorted, because in the bordering Russia only one small part, namely Omsk oblast, uses UTC+6 – therefore the eastern part of Kazakhstan is squeezed to fit. On the other hand, the western part of Kazakhstan borders with parts of Russia using as far as UTC+3, which is depicted by a long west-reaching finger. Kazakhstan has a significant part of {{w|Caspian Sea}} coast, but here it has only a tiny stretch.
|-
| {{w|Mongolia}} || UTC+7 – UTC+8 || Vertically stretched in the western half as mentioned in the Title-Text | Mongolia primarily uses the UTC+8 time zone but has some western portions using the UTC+7 time zone. Its neighbor to the south, China, is geographically located across three time zones (UTC+6-UTC+8) but by governmental decision only uses the eastern UTC+8 time zone. This choice by China has caused it to shrink towards the east on the map, requiring other countries to replace the unoccupied map area in the UTC+6 and UTC+7 time zones. Mongolia is one of very few countries using the UTC+7 time zone near China, and therefore it has been the primary recipient of the extra space generated by China's shrinking. It has occupied much of what would on an ordinary map be central Chinese territory.
|
|-
| {{w|Turkmenistan}} || UTC+5 || ||
|-
| {{w|Uzbekistan}} || UTC+5 || ||
|-
| {{w|Afghanistan}}* || UTC+4:30 || ||
|-
| {{w|Tajikistan}} (Taj.) || UTC+5 || ||
|-
| {{w|Pakistan}} || UTC+5 || ||
|-
| {{w|India}}* || UTC+5:30 || ||
|-
| {{w|Sri Lanka}} (not labeled) || UTC+5:30 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Nepal}}* || UTC+5:45 || ||
|-
| {{w|Bhutan}} (unreadable label) || UTC+6 || || Labeled unreadable.
|-
| {{w|China}} || UTC+8 || Heavily squashed horizontally, with finger-like tendrils to the west || All of China is in UTC+8 (usage of UTC+6 exists in Western Xinjiang but is unofficial). However, it reaches as far west as Tajikistan, in UTC+5, and even has an extremely short border with Afghanistan in UTC+4.5. A border is also shown with Pakistan - this is disputed by some who support India in the {{w|Kashmir conflict}}, but represents the ''de facto'' {{w|Line of Control}} between India and Pakistan.
|-
| {{w|Taiwan}} (not labeled) || UTC+8 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|North Korea}}* (N.K.) || UTC+8:30 || || In the map North Korea is smushed West of South Korea because North Korea at the time of publication had a time zone that is set half an hour off from South Korea's time zone.
|-
| {{w|South Korea}} (S.K.) || UTC+9 || ||
|-
| {{w|Japan}} || UTC+9 || ||
|-
| {{w|Bangladesh}} (Ban.) || UTC+6 || ||
|-
| {{w|Myanmar|Burma}}* (Bur.) || UTC+6:30 || ||
|-
| {{w|Laos}} || UTC+7 || ||
|-
| {{w|Vietnam}} || UTC+7 || ||
|-
| {{w|Thailand}} || UTC+7 || ||
|-
| {{w|Cambodia}} (not labeled) || UTC+7 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Philippines}} || UTC+8 || ||
|-
| {{w|Oceania}}/{{w|Australia}} (not labeled) || UTC+7 – UTC+12 || || Not labeled.
|-
| {{w|Malaysia}} || UTC+8 || Malaysia and {{w|Singapore}} (not shown) stretched East from the rest of peninsular Southeast Asia || Malaysia and Singapore both switched to using UTC+8 on 1 January 1982, after using GMT+7.30 under British rule and UTC+9 during the Japanese occupation. This change was due to Malaysia wanting to standardise time between East and West Malaysia, with Malaysia choosing to use the time in East Malaysia, with Singapore following suit.
|-
| {{w|Indonesia}} || UTC+7 – UTC+9 || ||
|-
| {{w|Papua New Guinea}} || UTC+10 – UTC+11 || ||
|-
| {{w|Australia}} || UTC+8, UTC+9:30, UTC+10 || || Although the UTC+8:45 region is acknowledged by local authorities, legally the region shares the same time zone as the rest of Western Australia, UTC+8.
|-
| {{w|New Zealand}} || UTC+12 || None. || The main islands use UTC+12. There is a small archipelago under New Zealand's rule, the {{w|Chatham Islands}}, which use non-standard UTC+12:45 time, but it is too small to depict.
|}

==Transcript==
:Bad map projection #79:
:<big>Time Zones</big>
:Where each country '''''should''''' be,
:based on its time zone(s)

:[A world map is shown divided and colored by political boundaries. There are many distortions, and especially Russia looks weird. Many countries have their name listed in a gray font and at the bottom below Australia there are two specialties mentioned for time zones which are not divided in full hours. One of these is a footnote used by other countries as well.]

:[The labels are listed here in order of the "continents" as they come from top left to down right. Similarly within each continent's list the countries which are usually said to belong to a given continent (at least politically or partially, e.g. Greenland and Turkey in Europe) are listed in a similar reading order as accurately as possible.]

:[North America. (Newfoundland, the most easterly part of Canada, is labeled with a star *):]
:Canada, *, United States, Mexico, Gua., Hon., Nic., C.R., Pan., Cuba, Haiti, Jam., D.R.

:[South America:]
:Colombia, Venezuela, Guyana, F.G., Suriname, Peru, Brazil, Bolivia, Par., Chile, Argentina, Uruguay

:[Europe. (Russia is as the only country mentioned twice, the other place is over the central part in the Asia section):]
:Greenland, Iceland, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Ireland, UK, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, Bel., Russia, Ger., Pol., Ukraine, France, It., Romania, Portugal, Spain, Bulgaria, Turkey

:[Africa:]
:W.S., Tunisia, Morocco, Algeria, Mauritania, Sen., Mali, Niger, Libya, Egypt, Sudan, Gb., Guin., B.F., S.L., Liberia, Côte d'Ivoire, Ghana, Nigeria, Chad, Cam., C.A.R., S.S., Ethiopia, Somalia, E.G., Gabon, R. of Congo, Dem. Rep. of the Congo, Kenya, Angola, Zambia, Tanzania, Namibia, Bots., Zimb., Mozambique, Madagascar, South Africa

:[Asia. (Russia is the only country mentioned twice, the other label is within the European border. The text written over Bhutan is unreadable in the image and marked with a question mark in this list):]
:Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Yemen, Iran*, Oman, Russia, Kazakhstan, Mongolia, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, Afghanistan*, Taj., Pakistan, India*, Nepal*, ?, China, N.K.*, S.K., Japan, Ban., Bur.*, Laos, Vietnam, Thailand, Philippines

:[Oceania/Australia. (In Australia there is a star * in the middle of it above the name):]
:Malaysia, Indonesia, Papua New Guinea, <nowiki>*</nowiki>, Australia, New Zealand

:[Below Australia there is an arrow pointing to the south coast and below that a footnote for the stars * used above:]
:UTC+8:45
:(One small area)

:<nowiki>*</nowiki>=Half-hour offset

*'''Click''' to expand for a more detailed description:
<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
 
:[There are no more text from the comic here below:]

:[A world map is shown divided and colored by political boundaries. Antarctica is not included. Bodies of water are white. The map is clearly distorted, with Europe and Africa in the center, but not all continents or countries look wrong. Africa, Australia and North America seem least distorted. But the bottom part of of South America is very slim, Greenland has two chewing gum like blobs stretched away from it to the right, Iceland is over the UK, and most of Europe has been compressed. Finland is too large though. In Africa especially Dem. Rep. the Congo has been enlarged. The worst distortion is in Asia, where especially Russia looks weird with three deep troughs down the length of the country and the end to the right seems to be much longer than usually. But also China is completely wrong as it has been compressed, Mongolia taking up most of its usual position.]

:[Most countries over a certain size have their name listed in a gray font. Small countries like Ireland and Haiti has their name listed in the oceans around them. Most other countries have the name inside the country, but if there is not enough room abbreviations are used. There are also a few specialties mentioned when time zones are not divided in full hours, for instance a footnote regarding time zones with a half hour offset.]
</div>
 

==Trivia==
===Errors===
* Mixing labels:
** Randall mixes up Morocco and Western Sahara (a disputed territory)
** Suriname and French Guiana also have switched labels.
*Wrong time zones:
** {{w|East Thrace}}, the European portion of Turkey, is shown in Eastern European time (UTC+2). Actually, like the rest of Turkey, it uses UTC+3.
** Nepal's time zone is UTC+5:45
** {{w|Thule Air Base}} in northwestern Greenland follows UTC-4 rather than UTC-3, and should thus be shown on a tendril to the west, directly above Labrador and the rest of Atlantic Canada; instead, it is shown using UTC-3, like most of the rest of Greenland. This is especially strange considering that Randall has correctly drawn {{w|Danmarkshaven}} as using UTC and {{w|Ittoqqortoormiit}} as using UTC-1.
* Borders and adjacency are not always preserved although often attempted as mentioned in the section on [[#Map imperfections|map imperfections]]:
** Estonia is shown sharing a border with Finland - in fact, the two countries are separated by the {{w|Gulf of Finland}}. This sea should run to {{w|St Petersburg}} in Russia - instead, the city is shown as landlocked.
** Norway should border Russia. See {{w|Norway–Russia border}}.
** Azerbaijan territory is mistakenly attributed to Georgia – Georgia should not have coast on the Caspian Sea. Armenia should not have coast on the Caspian Sea as well.
** Tajikistan should not border Kazakhstan and follows UTC+5 rather than UTC+6. These would apply to Kyrgyzstan, which is not drawn in the map; Kyrgyzstan, however, does not border Afghanistan.
** Malawi has lost its border with Tanzania.

===Omissions===
Some countries and territories are missing from the map. Most of these omissions are undoubtedly deliberate, but some are likely mistakes.

* Countries supposedly too small to show on the map's scale are omitted. These include small European countries: {{w|Andorra}}, {{w|Kosovo}}, {{w|Liechtenstein}}, {{w|Luxembourg}}, {{w|Malta}}, {{w|Monaco}}, {{w|San Marino}} and the {{w|Vatican City}}, {{w|Djibouti}} in Africa, {{w|Singapore}} in Asia.
* All the Pacific Ocean isles, including {{w|Hawaii}}.
* All Atlantic and Indian Ocean isles excluding {{w|Sri Lanka}} and {{w|Madagascar}}.
* Most of the small Caribbean countries and territories; however four small dots in the {{w|Lesser Antilles}} are depicted, but are unlabelled and cannot be definitively identified.
* Kyrgyzstan is clearly omitted by mistake.

===Map with Labeled time zones===
*[[:File:1799 Map with Labeled time zones.PNG| Here]] is a map with labeled time zones, made by a user who posted the link in the [[#Discussion|discussion]]. 

===Time zone map overlayed the comic===
*And [[:File:1799_overlay.png| here]] is an attempt that shows a {{w|time zone}} map overlayed with the comic. 

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Maps]]
[[Category:Bad Map Projections]]

Talk:2355: University COVID Model

2020-09-04T21:47:14Z

172.69.42.44:

Wait, people in college go to parties? Hm. Must be something people sent to High School for "socialization", participate in.
[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 21:04, 4 September 2020 (UTC)

This likely relates to https://xkcd.com/793/, do we want to mention that? [[Special:Contributions/172.69.42.44|172.69.42.44]] 21:47, 4 September 2020 (UTC)