1809: xkcd Phone 5

2017-03-10T13:38:34Z

Betoraposa:

{{comic
| number = 1809
| date = March 10, 2017
| title = xkcd Phone 5
| image = xkcd_phone_5.png
| titletext = The phone will be collected by the toll operators and mailed back to you within 4-6 weeks.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Needs a lot more}}
Today's cartoon is the fifth [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone]] with many questionably-useful features:

===Table of features===
{| class="wikitable"
!Feature
!Explanation
|-
|'''Bluetooth speaker'''
| This is the only potentially useful feature of this phone as while a bluetooth speaker built in to the device would be no more useful for playing music from it than any other speaker it would enable other devices to play through your phone.
|-
|'''Stained glass display'''
| Prevents seeing certain colors. This would also make the phone considerably heavier due to the weight of the glass.
|-
|'''Gallium chassis'''
| It has a melting point of 85°F (or 29.7°C), making it impossible to be carried on the bare skin.
|-
|'''Soundproof'''
| Presumably this means that speakers and microphone may not work.
|-
|'''Can feel pain'''
| This would presumably become apparent when the chassis melts on contact with exposed skin and the phone is left with open wounds.
|-
|'''E-Z Pass partnership'''
|E-Z Pass is an account you put money into and you put a transmitter in your windshield so when you go through a toll booth you don't have to stop and pay by hand.
|-
|'''Foldable (once)'''
|Presumably you can "fold" it by snapping it in half but you can only do his once because the phone wont work otherwise. It may refer to the fact that a later version of iPhone had a weak spot that lead it to easily folding and breaking. The "(once)" part may refer to a joke by Jeff Dunham on his Meet Melvin act, where he asks the puppet if it can stop a speeding bullet, to which the puppet says "Once".
|-
|'''Screen transfers images to skin'''
| This could either mean the image displayed on the screen or potentially whatever the stained glass image itself is.
|-
|'''Retina storage'''
|
|-
|'''Background task automatically catches and eats Pokemon'''
|
|-
|'''Supercuts partnership'''
|
|-
|'''Squeltch knob'''
|
|-
|'''IBM bukcling-spring Home button'''
|
|-
|'''Cot-caught merger switch'''
|
|-
|'''60x optical zoom camera'''
|
|-
|'''Loran navigation'''
| Once developed for sea shipping, it enables navigation by land-based radio transmitters and is accurate to about 300 meters.
|-
|'''28-factor authentication'''
|
|-
|'''Hook shot'''
| Either a reference to the basketball shot or the Legend of Zelda weapon/tool, used to bring items to Link or bring Link closer to a goal.
|-
|}

==Transcript==

:[An image of a smartphone featuring large camera lens is shown. Clockwise from the top the labels read:]

:Bluetooth speaker

:Stained-glass display

:Gallium chassis remains solid up to 85°F

:Soundproof

:Can feel pain

:E-Z Pass partnership: phone can be dropped into coin basket to pay tolls

:Foldable (once)

:Screen transfers images to skin

:Retina storage

:Background task automatically catches and eats Pokemon

:Supercuts partnership: trims hair fed into charging port

:Squeltch knob

:IBM buckling-spring Home button

:Cot-caught merger switch

:60x optical zoom camera

:Loran navigation

:28-factor authentication

:Hook shot

:[Below the phone:]
:Introducing
:<big><big>The XKCD Phone 5</big></big>
:We're trying to catch up to Apple but refuse to skip numbers®™
{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:xkcd Phones]]

1735: Fashion Police and Grammar Police

2016-09-19T19:04:34Z

Betoraposa: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1735
| date = September 19, 2016
| title = Fashion Police and Grammar Police
| image = fashion_police_and_grammar_police.png
| titletext = * Mad about jorts
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Needs more added to the explanation.}}
In this comic, two groups of protesters are presented, with one group representing the "fashion police", and the other representing "grammar" police. They are both groups of people who make fun of others by saying or wearing something that doesn't meet their criteria of "good". Grammar police are people who are "sticklers" to grammar rules and get mad or contradictory if someone uses grammar incorrectly in a sentence. Fashion police are people who make fun of others who wear clothing that is mismatched, out of style or straight-up "ugly" to them. The comic explains how the two groups are similar to each other.

'''Literally''' The comic concludes that these are literally the same people because they exhibit the listed same traits. The use of "literally" to emphasize a statement is considered by the grammar police as a dread crime that should be pointed out as such, although the dictionaries already include this definition as acceptable. On the other hand, fashion police is known for overusing "literally" in the way the grammar police finds disgusting.

'''Jorts''' A pair of shorts made from a pair of jeans. The fashion police would be mad about jorts for being unfashionable, while the grammar police would be mad about the word 'jorts' being an inappropriate portmanteau of jeans and shorts.

==Transcript==
[Two aggressive-looking groups of people. One holding signs with a X through a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crocs Crocs] shoe and labelled "Fashion Police", and one holding signs with "Their, They're, There" written on them and labeled "Grammar Police".] 
- Judgmental and Smug 
- Angry about something deeply arbitrary 
- Strong opinions backed by style guides 
- Appreciate that the way that you're interpreted is your responsibility 
- Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own 
- To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well 
- Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class 
- Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you 
I just realized that these are literally the same people
{{comic discussion}}

explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1809: xkcd Phone 5

1735: Fashion Police and Grammar Police