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997: Wait Wait

2025-12-16T13:12:31Z

CheshireCat: I messed up my previous edit

{{comic
| number = 997
| date = December 30, 2011
| title = Wait Wait
| image = wait_wait.png
| titletext = You can't stab Carl Kasell. He sounds all slow and stentorian, but he moves like a snake.
}}

==Explanation==

{{incomplete|Provide a detailed explanation for all panels.}}

''{{w|Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me}}'' is an hour-long weekly radio news panel game show produced by {{w|Chicago Public Radio}} and {{w|National Public Radio}}. The show is hosted by {{w|playwright}} and actor {{w|Peter Sagal}}. Each episode ends with the panelists making up a potential future news story, usually with implausible "facts". This comic is making puns on the title of the show based on what Peter Sagal might have done that was newsworthy.

{{w|Carl Kasell}}, who also served as the news anchor on {{w|Morning Edition}}, was the show's official judge and scorekeeper until May 2014 (after this comic was published), when he retired and was replaced by Bill Kurtis.

{| class="wikitable" style="width:100%;"
|+ Headlines
|-
! scope="col" | Headline Explanation
! scope="col" | Column 1
! scope="col" | Column 2
! scope="col" | Column 3
! scope="col" | Column 4
|-
! scope="row" | Row 1
|
|
| The 1st row, 3rd paper mocks classic celebrity scandal articles. In this example, {{w|Peter Sagal}} confesses his feelings towards {{w|Kermit the Frog}}.
| The 1st row, 4th paper may refer to the {{w|Michael_Richards#2006–2012:_Laugh_Factory_incident_and_aftermath| Laugh Factory Incident}} of 2006.
|-
! scope="row" | Row 2
| One meaning of "axe" is "end, cancel, or dismiss suddenly and ruthlessly." In the second row, first headline, NPR is canceling ''Wait Wait''.
| In the second row, second headline, it's imagined that Sagal stabbed Carl Kasell on air after being interrupted by him.
| Poison ivy has an irritating oil on its leaves called {{w|urushiol}} that causes an itchy, irritating rash on the contact site. In the 3rd paper on the 2nd row, Sagal touched some poison ivy with his face, and is urging people to not look at his unsightly rash.
| The 4th paper of the 2nd row may be inspired by [https://www.npr.org/2011/02/26/134060943/actor-jesse-eisenberg-plays-not-my-job a segment of ''Wait Wait'' in January 2011] in which actor {{w|Jesse Eisenberg}} revealed he had made a Facebook account under Sagal's name, and later deleted it.
|-
! scope="row" | Row 3
| {{w|Lakshmi Singh}} is NPR's national midday newscaster. In the 3rd row, 1st paper, it's revealed that Sagal had an affair with Singh.
| In the 2nd paper on the 3rd row, Sagal's wife divorces him over his affair with Singh.
| The 3rd row, 3rd paper references a protest at {{w|UC Davis}} (on the campus of University of California, Davis) in early 2012 in which sitting, peaceful protesters were calmly pepper-sprayed in their faces by a police officer. That spawned an [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/casually-pepper-spray-everything-cop internet meme of epic proportions].
|
|-
! scope="row" | Row 4
|
| The 4th row, 2nd paper is a reference to the movie ''{{w|Ghostbusters}}''.
| The 4th row, 3rd paper is a reference to {{w|Granny Weatherwax}} of Terry Pratchett's ''{{w|Discworld}}'' novels; Granny Weatherwax is a witch who carries a sign saying "[https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=i%20aten't%20ded I ATEN'T DED]"[sic] while having out-of-body experiences.
|
|-
! scope="row" | Row 5
|
| The 5th row, 2nd paper references an internet meme in which someone leaves out the verb in the sentence. The implication is that the verb is something bad, but ''which'' bad thing is left as an exercise to stew in the reader's mind. See the [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/i-accidentally I Accidentally ___ meme] for more information.
| The 5th row, 3rd paper is a reference to stories and myths in which an entity known as an {{tvtropes|EldritchAbomination|Eldritch Abomination}} can be summoned, awoken, or alerted to someone's presence when its name is spoken. A well-known example of this is the entity Cthulhu in the Lovecraft mythos.
|This American Life is a weekly public radio podcast which has a different theme each week and puts together a collection of stories on said topic.
|}

Two years later another New Years comic, [[1311: 2014]], took a similar look at what could happen in 2014, just as this does for 2012. Interesting enough the title of that comic (just the year it was looking at) is more related to the title of the next comic after this one, which is also a New Year comic, and the title is also just the number of the year: [[998: 2012]].

==Transcript==
:Headlines
:Stockpiled in case Peter Sagal, host of NPR's ''Wait Wait Don't Tell Me'', does something newsworthy in 2012.
:[A series of above-the-fold newspapers follows. Each has a headline and a blurb, and most have a picture.]
:[First row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Shoot Me
:NPR's Sagal in Whole Foods hostage standoff.
:[A fierce Peter Sagal in a balaclava brandishes a gun in a supermarket.]

:[First row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Vote For Me
:Peter Sagal quits race for GOP top spot
:[A sullen and defeated Peter Sagal surrounded by supporters admits defeat.]

:[First row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Judge Me
:Sagal opens up about his Kermit fantasy.
:[Stock profile images of Peter Sagal and Kermit the Frog.]

:[First row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Fire Me
:Peter Sagal let go after racist tirade.
:[Stock profile image of Peter Sagal.]

:[Second row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Cancel Me
:NPR axing news quiz.
:[NPR spokesperson delivering announcement.]

:[Second row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Interrupt Me
:Sagal stabs Carl Kasell in on-air dispute.
:[Peter Sagal mid-attack with a knife.]

:[Second row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Look At Me
:Peter Sagal's Poison Ivy Ordeal
:[Peter Sagal with a skin condition.]
:Peter Sagal: "My 'Nam"

:[Second row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Friend Me
:Peter Sagal deletes his Facebook account.
:[Person holding up a laptop with an "Facebook account not found" screen.]

:[Third row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Seduce Me
:How Lakshmi Singh stole Sagal's Heart.
:[A wistful Lakshmi Singh being left by a sullen Peter Sagal.]

:[Third row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Leave Me
:Sagal's wife out after affair
:[A wistful Peter Sagal being left by a furious Beth Sagal.]

:[Third row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Spray Me
:Police Raid Sagal's Occupy NPR protest
:[Scummy policeman in riot gear spraying Peter Sagal in the face point blank.]

:[Third row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Indict Me
:Sagal, five others named in cash-for-tote-bags scandal
:[Peter Sagal doing a perp walk.]

:[Fourth row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Clone Me
:Peter Sagal 'Outraged' over DNA harvesting.
:[Fiery Peter Sagal, missing a small amount of DNA, at a lectern.]

:[Fourth row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Bust Me
:Peter Sagal's ghost captured
:[Ghostbusters, careful not to cross the streams, capture the ghost of Peter Sagal.]

:[Fourth row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Dissect Me
:Snoozing Sagal nearly snuffed in autopsy snafu
:[Peter Sagal running away from from a very surprised pathologist.]
:Peter Sagal: "I aten't dead"

:[Fourth row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Objectify Me
:Peter Sagal is more than just a piece of meat
:[No image]

:[Fifth row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Beatify Me
:Peter Sagal Rebukes Pope
:[Peter Sagal shakes his fist at a picture of the pope.]

:[Fifth row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Me
:Peter Sagal Accidentally
:[Peter Sagal on a blank background upside-down.]

:[Fifth row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Speak Its Name
:Peter Sagal wakes Eldritch terror
:[A pair of eyes on a black background.]
:Peter Sagal:"AAAAAAAA"

:[Fifth row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Even For NPR This Is A Bit Much
:''This American Life'' to document the road to recovery for those who suffer the trauma of losing on Wait Wait
:[No image]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:New Year]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]]
[[Category:Comics with inverted brightness]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Ghostbusters]]
[[Category:Ghosts]]

997: Wait Wait

2025-12-16T13:10:44Z

CheshireCat: This American Life is a weekly public radio podcast which has a different theme each week and puts together a collection of stories on said topic.

{{comic
| number = 997
| date = December 30, 2011
| title = Wait Wait
| image = wait_wait.png
| titletext = You can't stab Carl Kasell. He sounds all slow and stentorian, but he moves like a snake.
}}

==Explanation==

{{incomplete|Provide a detailed explanation for all panels.}}

''{{w|Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me}}'' is an hour-long weekly radio news panel game show produced by {{w|Chicago Public Radio}} and {{w|National Public Radio}}. The show is hosted by {{w|playwright}} and actor {{w|Peter Sagal}}. Each episode ends with the panelists making up a potential future news story, usually with implausible "facts". This comic is making puns on the title of the show based on what Peter Sagal might have done that was newsworthy.

{{w|Carl Kasell}}, who also served as the news anchor on {{w|Morning Edition}}, was the show's official judge and scorekeeper until May 2014 (after this comic was published), when he retired and was replaced by Bill Kurtis.

{| class="wikitable" style="width:100%;"
|+ Headlines
|-
! scope="col" | Headline Explanation
! scope="col" | Column 1
! scope="col" | Column 2
! scope="col" | Column 3
! scope="col" | Column 4
|-
! scope="row" | Row 1
|
|
| The 1st row, 3rd paper mocks classic celebrity scandal articles. In this example, {{w|Peter Sagal}} confesses his feelings towards {{w|Kermit the Frog}}.
| The 1st row, 4th paper may refer to the {{w|Michael_Richards#2006–2012:_Laugh_Factory_incident_and_aftermath| Laugh Factory Incident}} of 2006.
|-
! scope="row" | Row 2
| One meaning of "axe" is "end, cancel, or dismiss suddenly and ruthlessly." In the second row, first headline, NPR is canceling ''Wait Wait''.
| In the second row, second headline, it's imagined that Sagal stabbed Carl Kasell on air after being interrupted by him.
| Poison ivy has an irritating oil on its leaves called {{w|urushiol}} that causes an itchy, irritating rash on the contact site. In the 3rd paper on the 2nd row, Sagal touched some poison ivy with his face, and is urging people to not look at his unsightly rash.
| The 4th paper of the 2nd row may be inspired by [https://www.npr.org/2011/02/26/134060943/actor-jesse-eisenberg-plays-not-my-job a segment of ''Wait Wait'' in January 2011] in which actor {{w|Jesse Eisenberg}} revealed he had made a Facebook account under Sagal's name, and later deleted it.
|-
! scope="row" | Row 3
| {{w|Lakshmi Singh}} is NPR's national midday newscaster. In the 3rd row, 1st paper, it's revealed that Sagal had an affair with Singh.
| In the 2nd paper on the 3rd row, Sagal's wife divorces him over his affair with Singh.
| The 3rd row, 3rd paper references a protest at {{w|UC Davis}} (on the campus of University of California, Davis) in early 2012 in which sitting, peaceful protesters were calmly pepper-sprayed in their faces by a police officer. That spawned an [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/casually-pepper-spray-everything-cop internet meme of epic proportions].
|
|-
! scope="row" | Row 4
|
| The 4th row, 2nd paper is a reference to the movie ''{{w|Ghostbusters}}''.
| The 4th row, 3rd paper is a reference to {{w|Granny Weatherwax}} of Terry Pratchett's ''{{w|Discworld}}'' novels; Granny Weatherwax is a witch who carries a sign saying "[https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=i%20aten't%20ded I ATEN'T DED]"[sic] while having out-of-body experiences.
|
|-
! scope="row" | Row 5
|
| The 5th row, 2nd paper references an internet meme in which someone leaves out the verb in the sentence. The implication is that the verb is something bad, but ''which'' bad thing is left as an exercise to stew in the reader's mind. See the [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/i-accidentally I Accidentally ___ meme] for more information.
| The 5th row, 3rd paper is a reference to stories and myths in which an entity known as an {{tvtropes|EldritchAbomination|Eldritch Abomination}} can be summoned, awoken, or alerted to someone's presence when its name is spoken. A well-known example of this is the entity Cthulhu in the Lovecraft mythos.
|
| This American Life is a weekly public radio podcast which has a different theme each week and puts together a collection of stories on said topic.

Two years later another New Years comic, [[1311: 2014]], took a similar look at what could happen in 2014, just as this does for 2012. Interesting enough the title of that comic (just the year it was looking at) is more related to the title of the next comic after this one, which is also a New Year comic, and the title is also just the number of the year: [[998: 2012]].

==Transcript==
:Headlines
:Stockpiled in case Peter Sagal, host of NPR's ''Wait Wait Don't Tell Me'', does something newsworthy in 2012.
:[A series of above-the-fold newspapers follows. Each has a headline and a blurb, and most have a picture.]
:[First row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Shoot Me
:NPR's Sagal in Whole Foods hostage standoff.
:[A fierce Peter Sagal in a balaclava brandishes a gun in a supermarket.]

:[First row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Vote For Me
:Peter Sagal quits race for GOP top spot
:[A sullen and defeated Peter Sagal surrounded by supporters admits defeat.]

:[First row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Judge Me
:Sagal opens up about his Kermit fantasy.
:[Stock profile images of Peter Sagal and Kermit the Frog.]

:[First row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Fire Me
:Peter Sagal let go after racist tirade.
:[Stock profile image of Peter Sagal.]

:[Second row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Cancel Me
:NPR axing news quiz.
:[NPR spokesperson delivering announcement.]

:[Second row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Interrupt Me
:Sagal stabs Carl Kasell in on-air dispute.
:[Peter Sagal mid-attack with a knife.]

:[Second row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Look At Me
:Peter Sagal's Poison Ivy Ordeal
:[Peter Sagal with a skin condition.]
:Peter Sagal: "My 'Nam"

:[Second row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Friend Me
:Peter Sagal deletes his Facebook account.
:[Person holding up a laptop with an "Facebook account not found" screen.]

:[Third row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Seduce Me
:How Lakshmi Singh stole Sagal's Heart.
:[A wistful Lakshmi Singh being left by a sullen Peter Sagal.]

:[Third row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Leave Me
:Sagal's wife out after affair
:[A wistful Peter Sagal being left by a furious Beth Sagal.]

:[Third row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Spray Me
:Police Raid Sagal's Occupy NPR protest
:[Scummy policeman in riot gear spraying Peter Sagal in the face point blank.]

:[Third row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Indict Me
:Sagal, five others named in cash-for-tote-bags scandal
:[Peter Sagal doing a perp walk.]

:[Fourth row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Clone Me
:Peter Sagal 'Outraged' over DNA harvesting.
:[Fiery Peter Sagal, missing a small amount of DNA, at a lectern.]

:[Fourth row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Bust Me
:Peter Sagal's ghost captured
:[Ghostbusters, careful not to cross the streams, capture the ghost of Peter Sagal.]

:[Fourth row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Dissect Me
:Snoozing Sagal nearly snuffed in autopsy snafu
:[Peter Sagal running away from from a very surprised pathologist.]
:Peter Sagal: "I aten't dead"

:[Fourth row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Objectify Me
:Peter Sagal is more than just a piece of meat
:[No image]

:[Fifth row, first newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Beatify Me
:Peter Sagal Rebukes Pope
:[Peter Sagal shakes his fist at a picture of the pope.]

:[Fifth row, second newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Me
:Peter Sagal Accidentally
:[Peter Sagal on a blank background upside-down.]

:[Fifth row, third newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Don't Speak Its Name
:Peter Sagal wakes Eldritch terror
:[A pair of eyes on a black background.]
:Peter Sagal:"AAAAAAAA"

:[Fifth row, fourth newspaper.]
:Title: Wait Wait Even For NPR This Is A Bit Much
:''This American Life'' to document the road to recovery for those who suffer the trauma of losing on Wait Wait
:[No image]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:New Year]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]]
[[Category:Comics with inverted brightness]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Ghostbusters]]
[[Category:Ghosts]]

703: Honor Societies

2025-12-15T19:17:38Z

CheshireCat:

{{comic
| number = 703
| date = February 17, 2010
| title = Honor Societies
| image = honor_societies.png
| titletext = Hey, why do YOU get to be the president of Tautology Clu-- wait, I can guess.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Cueball]] has apparently been invited to join an {{w|Honor society|honor society}}, but he considers the reason he should join to be a circular argument: because honorable people are in honor societies and people who are in honor societies are supposedly honorable. He objects that this is a {{w|tautology (language)|tautology}}: a claim that something is true because it is true (and thus a meaningless claim). From this, he concludes that he might as well be in a "tautology club" and then starts one. Thus [[Randall]] mocks honor society clubs for being pointless.

In the final panel where Cueball has formed the club, [[Ponytail]] asks a new member (a Cueball-like guy) how he found out about them and he tells about their Facebook page. The reference to {{w|Facebook}} mocks {{w|Facebook groups}} whose names refer to a number of members they hope to attract (such as I Bet I Can Find 1,000,000 People Who Dislike Romanian Dog Abusers), usually ostensibly to raise awareness for some issue but perhaps in fact just for the ego-stroking pleasure of amassing a large number of followers. Tautology Club employs this tactic only for the sake of creating yet another tautology.

Cueball is listing the rules of the club from a [[1661: Podium|podium]]. The phrase "The first rule of _______ Club" is a reference to the 1999 movie ''{{w|Fight Club}}'' (see also [[922: Fight Club]]), which contains the famous line "The first rule of Fight Club is 'You do not talk about Fight Club,'" a reference to the club's intended secrecy. This phrase has been appropriated for myriad other varieties and parodies, such as the one mentioned in the comic. The short guy with glasses could be {{w|List of FoxTrot characters#Jason Fox|Jason Fox}} from the {{w|FoxTrot}} comic (see the first two frames of [[824: Guest Week: Bill Amend (FoxTrot)]].) Although it takes a little imagination to see, the hair, the height, the glasses, and the geek factor fit. Three of the other characters from the audience look like regular characters but with slightly different hairstyles than usual. There is a buzz cut version of [[Hairy]], [[Jill]], and [[Danish]]. Tautologies would be mentioned again in [[1310: Goldbach Conjectures]]. Tautology Club was mentioned in [[1602: Linguistics Club]].

The answer to the title text would also be a tautology: he gets to be the president because he is the president.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball sits at a desk, while someone off-screen answers his question.]
:Cueball: Wait. I should join this honor society to show colleges I'm honorable, and I'm honorable because I'm in an honor society?
:Off-screen voice: Basically, yes.

:[Close up of Cueball.]
:Cueball: Sounds like I could save time by joining the Tautology Club directly.
:Off-screen voice: That's not a real club.
:Cueball: Then I'm starting it.

:[Inserted in a frame crossing the top of the third panel's frame is a caption. Cueball is standing on a podium in the right part of the panel speaking. From left to right we find Ponytail, a Cueball-like guy, a short guy with glasses, a buzz cut version of Hairy, Jill, and to the right of Cueball, a woman that looks like Megan although with an uncharacteristically white stripe in her hair.]
:Caption: Tautology Club:
:Ponytail: So how'd you learn about us?
:Cueball-like guy: From your Facebook group, "If 1,000,000 People Join This Group, It Will Have 1,000,000 People In It."
:Cueball: ''Listen up!'' The first rule of Tautology Club is the first rule of Tautology Club.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Jill]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Logic]]
[[Category:Fight Club]]
[[Category:Self-reference]]
[[Category:Comics with a Spanish translation]]