explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

A Smarter Planet

2014-05-16T12:39:40Z

Chriswampler:

{{comic
| number = asmarterplanet
| title = A Smarter Planet
| custom = [[file:conservation.png]] [[file:prescriptions.png]]
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|I found [http://xkcd.com/asmarterplanet/ this bonus comic] but it's not mentioned anywhere on the wiki. I wasn't sure how to put multiple images in the comic template.}}

These comics were created as a special request for the blog [http://asmarterplanet.com/ A Smarter Planet], rather than the regular three-a-week schedule for xkcd's home site.

The first of these two strips references a commonly-cited statistic usually used to draw attention to deforestation, but Cueball misunderstands its true importance.

The second strip is a reference to the stereotype of doctors' handwriting being illegible. Also, the prescription number is given as "THX1138", which is also the name of the first film directed by George Lucas of Star Wars fame.

==Transcript==
===Conservation===
:They say that 400 years ago a squirrel could go from the Atlantic to the Mississippi without touching the ground.
:[Cueball speaking to an audience, under a banner labeled "Conservation Society".]
:Cueball [pointing to a diagram of a helicopter-like device carrying a squirrel]: Which is why I've developed the aerial squirrel transit pod.
:Audience member: Okay, back up.

===Prescriptions===
:Good news: Doctors are finally learning to use modern security tools.
:Doctor: No need for phone verification. I've digitally signed it.
:Bad news: They've somehow learned to ''type'' with terrible handwriting.
:[The document given to the patient by the doctor]: Prescription THX1138 RSA fingerprint: [unintelligible characters]
{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Science]]

File:prescriptions.png

2014-05-16T12:39:02Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:conservation.png

2014-05-16T12:37:13Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

Talk:1037: Umwelt

2014-05-07T20:34:34Z

Chriswampler:

Normally I understand xkcd. But this one hurts my head. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]] ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 20:35, 15 August 2012 (UTC)
: I sorted all of them out. Phew!!! That was some work. The ones at the end have no appropriate picture in the image part. Atleast the hurricane one should be added. Please do so. [[User:TheOriginalSoni|TheOriginalSoni]] ([[User talk:TheOriginalSoni|talk]]) 11:09, 8 September 2012 (UTC)
:: I live in one of Umwelt's "hurricane areas", and that's the one I see. How do we add it? [[User:Ekedolphin|Ekedolphin]] ([[User talk:Ekedolphin|talk]]) 06:06, 30 January 2013 (UTC)

There is a fixed image used if your browser does not support javascript, which is missing. Additionally, the alt text varies at times. [[User:Divad27182|Divad27182]] ([[User talk:Divad27182|talk]]) 20:16, 4 October 2012 (UTC)

I can't see any of them neither in Firefox nor in IE :( --[[User:Kronf|Kronf]] ([[User talk:Kronf|talk]]) 11:32, 13 October 2012 (UTC)

This has got to be one of my favourite xkcd's! That amount of ingenuity in one edition! [[User:D3KN0W|Dean]] ([[User talk:D3KN0W|talk]]) 22:33, 01 January 2013 (UTC)

There is now also a category page for Jurassic Park, but I'm not sure how to work that into the explanation. [[User:Kaa-ching|Kaa-ching]] ([[User talk:Kaa-ching|talk]]) 09:04, 28 January 2013 (UTC)

I can't resist noting that Chrome is sadly mistaken in thinking that its puzzle piece links up to a corner piece - it would have to be an edge piece to do that. Firefox would never have that kind of issue... [[User:Natf|Natf]] ([[User talk:Natf|talk]])
: Supposedly, if there were a puzzle with inner corners, such as one with a plus cut out of it, this could link up as shown. ... I wanna make a puzzle like that now. [[Special:Contributions/99.44.200.140|99.44.200.140]] 08:00, 1 June 2013 (UTC)

It would be difficult to compile, but I think this page would benefit from having the conditions along with the image (for instance, "Displays when running Netscape:") [[Special:Contributions/24.41.66.114|24.41.66.114]] 03:27, 6 September 2013 (UTC)

Hey, um, I think there is an Animaniacs reference. Namely, the question about hot dogs resembles Yakko's question to the Wally Llama except it dealt with packages of eight and packages of ten. (I forget which is which) {{unsigned ip|71.166.47.84}}

I came here to seek informartion about how each strip was seen. Disappointed... Especially after seeing there is a hebrew one!?!?!?!? (number 29) Is it real? Because I assume it should be visible from Israel and I can't see it [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.228|141.101.99.228]] 22:26, 30 December 2013 (UTC)

Added two location references to the 2Fast2Furious and Snake comics, with browser references. Anyone know why I got those results? {{unsigned ip|173.245.50.77}}
: I don't, especially since I live in the UK (not Texas) and yet I see the Snake comic? [[User:Enchantedsleeper|Enchantedsleeper]] ([[User talk:Enchantedsleeper|talk]]) 14:14, 7 April 2014 (UTC)

I found a new one, it seems to display when using TOR. Should I add it? [[Special:Contributions/173.245.49.60|173.245.49.60]] 02:22, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
:Yes definitely. [[User:Chriswampler|Chriswampler]] ([[User talk:Chriswampler|talk]]) 16:07, 7 May 2014 (UTC)
::The Reviews comic just as appearing under TOR is actually comic #1036. Can you confirm that it is actually showing up under Umwelt? [[User:Chriswampler|Chriswampler]] ([[User talk:Chriswampler|talk]]) 20:34, 7 May 2014 (UTC)

Talk:1037: Umwelt

2014-05-07T16:07:06Z

Chriswampler:

Talk:1000: 1000 Comics

2014-05-05T13:13:47Z

Chriswampler: Connect the dots

Cueball does not think in multiples of 2, he thinks in base 2 (or powers of 2). I fixed it. [[Special:Contributions/134.102.123.217|134.102.123.217]] 10:35, 10 September 2012‎ (UTC)

In the original Blog format of this website, someone named Phillip had [http://www.explainxkcd.com/2012/01/06/1000-comics/#comment-19950 shared the following]:
:"Spoiler ( http://rot13.com/index.php ): Pbaarpg gur ovanel ahzoref ba gur fznyy fvtaf va cnvag-ol-ahzoref znaare."
Hint: copy/paste the weird looking text into the text field provided in the above mentioned website. Even after decryption, I couldn't follow what he meant, but I was hoping someone out there can do so and then explain it differently, thanks. It's a real mystery. [[User:DelendaEst|DelendaEst]] ([[User talk:DelendaEst|talk]]) 08:47, 22 September 2012 (UTC)
: Added hidden image to Trivia section. --[[User:Bpothier|B. P.]] ([[User talk:Bpothier|talk]]) 11:06, 22 September 2012 (UTC)

Just curious... The explanation says there are 1000 characters in the drawing. Are there 998 + Megan & Cueball? or do they make 1002? --[[User:Bpothier|B. P.]] ([[User talk:Bpothier|talk]]) 11:06, 22 September 2012 (UTC)

: The transcript says "1000 characters ... are arranged to create the number "1000". Two more people stand in the foreground" so I think Megan & Cueball make it 1002. [[User:Coombeseh|Coombeseh]] ([[User talk:Coombeseh|talk]]) 10:56, 12 November 2012 (UTC)

There's a WOPR machine saying "would you like to play a game?" [[Special:Contributions/116.76.165.167|116.76.165.167]] 05:51, 28 September 2012 (UTC)

I noticed Barrel Boy isn't on here... [[User:Castriff|Jimmy C]] ([[User talk:Castriff|talk]]) 19:10, 31 October 2012 (UTC)
: Barrel Boy is bottom right on the second "O", just above "WOOOO!" [[User:Coombeseh|Coombeseh]] ([[User talk:Coombeseh|talk]]) 10:56, 12 November 2012 (UTC)

Well about what cueball says another interesting fact is that the number 1024 is used commonly in computer data, 1024 megabytes makes a gigabyte and so on...

:So, has anyone noticed that this wasn't actually Randall's thousandth comic, but rather his 999th? [[User:Schiffy|Schiffy]] ([[User talk:Schiffy|talk]]) 16:44, 12 March 2013 (UTC)
::Is there a numbered comic that was omitted?[[Special:Contributions/74.213.186.41|74.213.186.41]] 13:10, 1 April 2013 (UTC)
:::Yes, comic 404 never existed, remember? [[User:Schiffy|Schiffy]] ([[User talk:Schiffy|talk]]) 17:04, 9 April 2013 (UTC)
::::Comic 404 was "Journal 3". [[Special:Contributions/121.54.48.38|121.54.48.38]] 04:24, 12 May 2013 (UTC)
:::::Or maybe Comic 404 DID exist, However was left behind within the bowels of abandoned comics... Never got into xkcd to fill the gap... Because it's place was replaced with the 404 page. [[Special:Contributions/121.54.48.38|121.54.48.38]] 04:25, 12 May 2013 (UTC)
:::::: Well, All hope is no use, I googled up "xkcd 404" and it gave no results about a 404th comic ever existed, Nor "xkcd no 404" or "xkcd's 404th comic", I guess we have to discuss about this in here: http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=80760 [[Special:Contributions/121.54.48.38|121.54.48.38]] 04:29, 12 May 2013 (UTC)
:::::::Even this very site shows that Comic 404 never existed. Comic 403 was on a Monday, and 405 was the following Wednesday. The day in between those two (the Tuesday of that week) was April 1st. For further proof, see [http://xkcd.com/404 here]. [[User:Schiffy|Schiffy]] ([[User_talk:Schiffy|Speak to me]]|[[Special:Contributions/Schiffy|What I've done]]) 17:39, 17 May 2013 (UTC)
::::::::Hey, that's the April's fool from 2008. The 404 message is from Randall!!! Check the page source: [http://xkcd.com/404/ April, 1]--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 18:51, 17 May 2013 (UTC)

;The "1000 Characters" section
I really don't see why it should be there. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.71|108.162.216.71]] 03:43, 8 January 2014 (UTC)
:I did remove this. All the 1,000 comics are explained here very well. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:34, 8 January 2014 (UTC)
Cipher text: CONNECT THE BINARY NUMBERS ON THE SMALL SIGNS IN PAINT-BY-NUMBERS MANNER [[User:Jwoodward48xkcd|Jwoodward48xkcd]] ([[User talk:Jwoodward48xkcd|talk]])

Following with this wiki's goal of explaining the nuances of the XKCD comics I moved the connect the dots puzzle out of trivia and placed it int the main article. It isn't a spoiler or just trivia, it fits well with the title text and is definitely not something a casual reader would find on the first pass through the comic. [[User:Chriswampler|Chriswampler]] ([[User talk:Chriswampler|talk]]) 13:13, 5 May 2014 (UTC)

1000: 1000 Comics

2014-05-05T13:09:27Z

Chriswampler: Moved connect the dots out of trivia into main article

{{comic
| number = 1000
| date = January 6, 2012
| title = 1000 Comics
| image = 1000 comics.png
| imagesize = 800px
| titletext = Thank you for making me feel less alone.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|There are some small jokes in the 1000 that don't refer to previous comics, such as "Would you like to play a game?" from War Games; "Altavista Ron Paul" (a "Google Santorum" reference), and so on.}}
This comic is the 1000th comic shown on xkcd, including [[404: Not Found]], containing 1000 characters from previous comics arranged in the shape of the number "1000". [[Megan]] is clearly excited as she screams "Wooooo!", but [[Cueball]], in true nerd fashion, thinks in base 2, saying that there are "just 24 to go until a big round-number milestone". The joke is that often, during programming, base two is used more often than base 10, making milestones be powers of two rather than powers of 10. Where 1000 is a round number in base 10 (103), 1024 is a round number in base 2 (210).

===Connect the Dots===
There is a connect the dots puzzle hidden within the comic. However, rather than using the conventional decimal system numbering which would start with 1 and count up, 2, 3, 4, 5, ... This connect the dots puzzle starts with 0 as programmer would do and counts up in binary numerical order - 0,1,10,11,100,101,110,111,1000,1001 and back to 0. The revealed image forms the shape of a heart. This fits well with the title text where feeling less alone can equate to feeling loved.

[[File:1000 comics binary.png]]

==Transcript==
:[1000 characters, numerous of which have appeared previously in other comics, are arranged to create the number "1000". Two more people stand in the foreground commenting on the formation]
:Megan: ''WOOOO!''
:Cueball: Wow—Just 24 to go until a big round-number milestone!

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Math]]

1363: xkcd Phone

2014-05-04T19:17:03Z

Chriswampler:

{{comic
| number = 1363
| date = May 2, 2014
| title = xkcd Phone
| image = xkcd_phone.png
| titletext = Presented in partnership with Qualcomm, Craigslist, Whirlpool, Hostess, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce. Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts. Price includes 2-year Knicks contract. Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles. If phone ships with Siri, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives. Do not remove lead casing. Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal. Volume adjustable (requires root). If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately. Do not submerge in water; phone will drown. Exterior may be frictionless. Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures. Avert eyes while replacing battery. Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is a parody of a multitude of mobile-technology related issues that, when brought together, create a general satire of smartphone advertising. The advertised features here either make previously useful capabilities useless or add features nobody wants. Except for "your mobile world (going) digital", which is old news.

From bottom left, going clockwise:

* '''FlightAware partnership:''' This is a reference to the [http://www.flightaware.com/ FlightAware] flight tracking service. This FlightAware partnership results in the phone playing airplane engine noise whenever a flight passes over the phone's current location, an annoying and arbitrary feature. It may also be superfluous, as such noise may be heard from the plane itself, depending on altitude.
* '''Realistic case:''' possibly a joke on various audiovisual devices like gaming consoles that advertise realistic sound, graphics, etc. Of course, applying "realistic" to an actual physical case is ridiculous. Either the case is actually real, or it doesn't actually function as a case. Possible reference to [[331: Photoshops]], where [[Cueball]] finds a physical object to not look realistic.
* '''Clear screen:''' This is a pointless descriptor from the perspective of the consumer. Of course the screen is clear. This joke works in tandem with the previous joke, as a play on "clear case, realistic screen," which are both hypothetically viable selling points.
* '''Side Facing Camera:''' There was a recent controversy surrounding an [https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/spy-cam-peek-i Indiegogo for a surreptitious, side-mounted camera device] for smartphones due to the advertisement of the device as a good way to take creep shots, which are illegal in many places. Widespread dissemination of these devices as a built-in feature would likely result in a sharp increase in delinquency of this nature. May also be an ''ad absurdum'' extension of devices with both forward and backward facing cameras.
* '''Custom blend OS:''' iOS and Android are offered by different conglomerates and run on different kernels. A "custom blend" would probably be a nightmare to work with.
* '''Simulates alternative speed of light:''' This renders the clock useless. The speed of light is roughly 2.99x108 meters per second. Relativistic effects, such as {{w|time dilation}}, are only noticeable at significant fractions of the speed of light. Since the phone is simulating a much slower speed of light, driving at even highway speeds will cause a significant amount of time dilation. For example, driving at 90mph (90% of the default simulated speed of light) will give a time dilation factor of about 2.29, causing the clock to advance only 26 minutes for each hour; driving at exactly 100mph makes the dilation factor infinite and will stop the clock entirely. Driving beyond 100mph...would make the clock start advancing through imaginary/complex time rather than real time. Somehow. (Let's not go there.)
* '''Wireless:''' as in cordless phone. This is the bare minimum a phone has to have in order to be a mobile phone, so advertising it as a feature feels dated by decades. Or, perhaps Munroe is implying the entire phone is without wires, in which case it wouldn't function.
* '''Accelerometer screams in free fall:''' Another useless function. Rather than having some sort of feature to prevent breakage or cracking when a drop is detected, the phone just makes you more aware of its potential imminent doom.
* '''When exposed to light, phone says "hi":''' Bait and switch, and also a build from the previous joke. The implied feature is that the screen or camera will automatically adjust, but instead the phone is weirdly anthropomorphized.

The ominous warnings and disclaimers in the title text are probably a reference to the ''Saturday Night Live'' parody ad for {{w|Happy Fun Ball}} ([http://www.rollingstone.com/movies/pictures/50-greatest-saturday-night-live-sketches-of-all-time-20140203/happy-fun-ball-0459912 original video hosted on rollingstone.com]).

* '''Presented in partnership with {{w|Qualcomm}}, {{w|Craigslist}}, Whirlpool, {{w|Hostess}}, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce.''' Qualcomm is a semiconductor company that designs and produces chips for mobile phones. {{w|Whirlpool Corporation}} is a large American multinational manufacturer and marketer of home appliances, while {{w|Whirlpool (website)|Whirlpool}} is a prominent Australian tech forum website, originally created for discussion of Australian broadband providers but now extending to cover general tech topics, including mobile phones. The other companies mentioned here have no association with mobile phones, though there is a long history of unrelated companies attempting to leverage their respective brands to help promote each other.
* '''Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts.''' A warning often seen on candy and other foods for people with a peanut allergy. It is highly unlikely that equipment used to produce mobile phones would also process food.
* '''Price includes 2-year Knicks contract.''' Mobile phones are often sold by phone companies in combination with a cell phone plan, but a contract with the {{w|New_York_Knicks|Knicks}} would only appeal to pro basketball players.
* '''Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles.''' A rather oddly specific capability, which might also be annoying for anyone attempting to host a birthday party. As to how it would do this, a very powerful directional speaker would be able to blow out a nearby candle, but the speakers in mobile phones aren't going to be that big.
* '''If phone ships with {{w|Siri}}, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives.''' {{w|Siri}} is a virtual personal assistant application for Apple devices. Not speaking to it and not following its instructions would defeat its purpose. It may suggest that a malevolent "Siri AI" has sneaked itself onto some devices, at the manufacturing stage, for some diabolical purpose. May be a reference to the Companion Cube in the game Portal, in which the player is instructed to disregard its advice if the cube appears to be animate.
* '''Do not remove lead casing.''' A mobile phone encased in lead would not function because it could not transmit or receive data. Devices that emit high levels of ionizing radiation are often encased in lead, but a phone that would emit that level of radiation would be unhealthy to carry around. If encased in sufficient lead to mitigate the danger, it would be uncomfortably heavy. This might be reference to [https://xkcd.com/925/ xkcd comic no 925: Cell phones] where Randall makes fun of the WHO claiming that cell phones might cause cancer despite huge studies showing the opposite. This could also mean the device is an actual bananaphone as regular phones emit no ionizing radiation ([http://xkcd.com/radiation xkcd Radiation Dose Chart]). Regrettably, the lead casing would render the phone inedible, although this somewhat mitigates the issues with having been manufactured on equipment that also processes peanuts.
* '''Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal.''' Some plants, like the {{w|Venus_flytrap|Venus flytrap}}, attract and trap insects, but mobile phones are not known to exhibit this behaviour. May be a reference to "crazy ants" which are attracted to electronics.
* '''Volume adjustable (requires root).''' {{w|Android_rooting|Rooting}} is the method to gain privileged access on Android phones. Adjusting the volume should be available to any user and would not be restricted to root access only.
* '''If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately.''' These symptoms are usually associated with chemical or radiation poisoning. Neither of these would be cured by a {{w|Factory_reset|factory reset}}.
* '''Do not submerge in water; phone will drown.''' Most phones are not waterproof and will probably short-circuit when submerged. Drowning however, would imply that the phone breathes air (which actually would be possible if it had a {{w|Lithium–air battery|Li-air battery}}).
* '''Exterior may be frictionless.''' The front of a smartphone is usually made of glass and should have a surface with very low friction. The back of a phone is usually made from a material that has higher friction to make it pleasant to hold and to make sure it doesn't slide off objects it is placed on. A [[669: Experiment|completely frictionless surface]] would make it almost impossible to hold and would make it very susceptible to drops (at which point the phone will scream).
* '''Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures.''' These are all side effects that are associated with certain kinds of medication or radiation treatment of the brain and would not be acceptable for mobile phones.
* '''Avert eyes while replacing battery.''' Actions that would warrant averting your eyes are usually associated with high-intensity light capable of causing eye damage. Depending on the specific energy source, this may be accompanied by high levels of other types of radiation (e.g. making an {{w|X-ray}} photo). This may hint that the phone might be powered by a radionuclide battery which would explain the lead casing and the possible radiation side effects. A phone that emits X-ray radiation would not be healthy to be around. Alternately, this may be a reference to the {{w|Ark_of_the_Covenant|Ark Of The Covenant}}, implying that gazing upon the battery or the compartment wall behind it is forbidden on pain of severe punishment.
* '''Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.''' According to most religions, God (or Gods) are usually in control of us. God(s) are usually viewed as not directly controllable.

==Transcript==
:Runs custom blend on Android and iOS
:Side-facing camera
:Simulates alternate speeds of light (default: 100 miles per hour) and adjusts clock as phone accelerates
:Clear screen
:Realistic case
:Wireless
:Accelerometer detects when phone is in free fall and makes it scream
:Flightaware partnership: Makes airplane noise when flights pass overhead
:When exposed to light, phone says "hi!"

:''Introducing''
:'''The xkcd phone'''
:Your mobile world just went digital®

{{comic discussion}}

681: Gravity Wells

2014-03-12T15:35:49Z

Chriswampler: /* Explanation */ Moved the Escape velocities table from the discussion section to the main article

{{comic
| number = 681
| date = December 28, 2009
| title = Gravity Wells
| image = gravity_wells.png
| titletext = This doesn't take into account the energy imparted by orbital motion (or gravity assists or the Oberth effect), all of which can make it easier to reach outer planets.
}}

The xkcd page links to [http://xkcd.com/681_large/ a much larger version].

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Fix Grammar and explain title text}}

The comic shows the relative strengths of the gravitational fields of each planet in the solar system as well as some of their satellites. Each well is scaled such that rising out of a physical well of that depth, in constant Earth surface gravity, would take the same energy as escaping from that planet's gravity in reality. Each planet is shown cut in half at the bottom of its well, with the depth of the well measured down to the planet's flat surface.

This is a simplified method of comparing the escape velocities of the various planets and satellites. In reality, the strength of gravity decreases the further you get from the planet. However, a comparison of energy expended to escape the gravitational pull allows for a simpler comparison between the objects.

Moons shown in the chart are at the appropriate distance from their respective planets' gravity wells for their orbits. Those moons featured are: Earth's moon, Mars' tiny moons Phobos and Deimos (in an inset panel), Jupiter's moons Ganymede, Io, and Europa, and Saturn's moon Titan.

The {{w|Sun|Sun's}} gravity well is not shown in its entirety, but is just indicated on the far left as ''"Very very far down"''. Had it been shown in its full extent it would have made the rest of the drawing so small in comparison that it would have been unreadable.

==== Inner Planets ====

* Mercury -- no facts listed

* Venus -- no facts listed

* Earth & Moon -- listed with the depth of the gravity well of 5,478 km for Earth and 288 km for the Moon. Calculations of depth is explained in the Saturn insert.

* Mars -- listed with the depth of gravity well of 1286 km

==== Cut outs ====

* The Mars cutout shows how small Mars' moons really are, specifically in terms of gravity. {{w|Deimos_(moon)|Deimos}} is so small that a bike jump would be sufficient to escape its gravity well and on {{w|Phobos_(moon)|Phobos}} you could launch a baseball into space simply by throwing it.

* The drawing next to Jupiter is playing on the classic "Yo Mama" joke, combining the aspects of your mom being very fat (having a huge gravitational pull) and very slutty (having sex with the entire football team), represented by the football team being attracted to, and falling into, her gravity well. A "Yo Mama" joke also appears in comic [[89:_Gravitational_Mass|89: Gravitational Mass]].

* The Earth/Moon cut out shows the significant difference in strength between the {{w|gravity well}} of the Earth and the Moon. Cueball comments on how the {{w|Apollo_Lunar_Module|Apollo Lunar Module}} could be so small and still return to Earth while the {{w|Saturn_V}} rocket used to get the moon had to be so huge since it was escaping Earth's well while the Lunar Module only needed to escape the pull of the Moon. The cut out also shows that objects like the {{w|International_Space_Station|International Space Station}}, the {{w|Space_shuttle|space shuttle}}, {{w|GPS_satellite|GPS satellites}} and {{w|Geostationary_orbit|geo-stationary satellites}} at their respective positions within Earth's gravity well.

==== Outer Planets ====

* {{w|Jupiter}} -- is so massive and dense that it is comparable in mass to a {{w|Brown dwarf}} which is the smallest kind of star. Saturn, while similar in size, is composed of much lighter gas material. Hence Saturn's mass and therefore its gravitational pull are much smaller. Strong gravitational pull is a significant factor in igniting fusion. As gravity pulls matter together the pressure and temperature increase. With sufficient increase in pressure and temperature {{w|Nuclear_fusion|nuclear fusion}} begins. Had that happen during creation of our solar system, i.e. had a few dozen times the mass of gasses contained in Jupiter condensed in that location, then we would had two {{w|Sun|Suns}} and our solar system would have been a {{w|Binary_system_(astronomy)|Binary system}}.

* {{w|Titan_(moon)|Titan}} -- The figures on Titan are sirens, a reference to Kurt Vonnegut's ''{{w|The Sirens of Titan}}''.

* {{w|Saturn}} & its rings -- The "Rings" in Saturn's gravity well are {{w|Rings_of_Saturn|Saturn's rings}}. The farther you get from a planet, the weaker the effect of its gravity on you, so, at some point, when climbing out of Saturn's gravity well, you've reached the point equivalent to starting your climb from the rings of Saturn, or, in fact, from specific rings of Saturn. Saturn's rings start fairly near the planet and extend out quite far, therefore multiple stripes are shown in the figure. The rings are also shown in multiple colors and roughly match the observed colors from photos take by the {{w|Cassini–Huygens|Cassini spacecraft}} expedition as it passed Saturn. All of the colors of the planets and moons represent the predominant color of that object as observed from earth.

* {{w|Uranus}} -- notably absent is any "your-anus" jokes.

* {{w|Neptune}} -- Megan's quote is a paraphrase of {{w|Carl_Sagan|Carl Sagan}}'s quote, "...but from a planet orbiting a star in a distant globular cluster, a still more glorious dawn awaits, not a sun-rise, but a galaxy rise." [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSgiXGELjbc Video here]]

==== How to interpret gravity wells ====

To escape a planet's or moon's orbit, you need merely climb to the highest of the two peaks to ''either'' the left or right of the object. So, for example, to escape Venus, you need merely reach the peak left of it, the slope right of it is part of the Sun's gravity well, and shows how much further you'd need to climb out of the Sun's gravity well to get from Venus to Earth. Likewise, the peak left of Jupiter is slightly lower than the one to the right; this is because the rightmost peak includes the difficulty of moving away from the Sun to get to Saturn, the next planet along.

The text explains that the depth of the well is mass-of-planet over radius-of-planet with newtons constant and 9.81 m/s² as constants, where 9.81 m/s² is the acceleration of a free falling body at Earth's gravity.

The calculation for a gravity well is:
:depth = (G * Planet-mass ) / (9.81 m/s2 * Planet-radius)
::where G is {{w|Isaac_Newton|Newton}}'s {{w|Gravitational_constant|gravitational constant}}, and
::9.81 m/s2 is the {{w|Acceleration|acceleration}} rate of a {{w|Gravity_of_Earth|free falling body on earth}} at sea level (g).

==== Escape Velocities ====

The following table was adapted from the table in {{w|Escape_velocity#List_of_escape_velocities|Escape velocity}}, using ''h'' = ''V_e''^2 / 2''g'':
{| class="wikitable" border="1"
| Location || with respect to || Ve (km/s) || Well depth (km) ||
| Location || with respect to || Ve (km/s) || Solar well (Mm) || Total depth (Mm)
|-
| on the Sun, || the Sun's gravity: || 617.5 || 19,435,000 || || || || || || 19,435
|-
| on Mercury, || Mercury's gravity: || 4.3 || 942 ||
| at Mercury, || the Sun's gravity: || 67.7 || 233.6 || 235
|-
| on Venus, || Venus' gravity: || 10.3 || 5,407 ||
| at Venus, || the Sun's gravity: || 49.5 || 124.9 || 130
|-
| on Earth, || the Earth's gravity: || 11.2 || 6,393 ||
| at the Earth/Moon, || the Sun's gravity: || 42.1 || 90.3 || 97
|-
| on the Moon, || the Moon's gravity: || 2.4 || 294 ||
| at the Moon, || the Earth's gravity: || 1.4 || || 91
|-
| on Mars, || Mars' gravity: || 5 || 1,274 ||
| at Mars, || the Sun's gravity: || 34.1 || 59.3 || 61
|-
| on Jupiter, || Jupiter's gravity: || 59.5 || 180,400 ||
| at Jupiter, || the Sun's gravity: || 18.5 || 17.4 || 198
|-
| on Ganymede, || Ganymede's gravity: || 2.7 || 372 || || || || ||
|-
| on Saturn, || Saturn's gravity: || 35.6 || 64,600 ||
| at Saturn, || the Sun's gravity: || 13.6 || 9.43 || 74
|-
| on Uranus, || Uranus' gravity: || 21.2 || 22,907 ||
| at Uranus, || the Sun's gravity: || 9.6 || 4.7 || 28
|-
| on Neptune, || Neptune's gravity: || 23.6 || 28,400 ||
| at Neptune, || the Sun's gravity: || 7.7 || 3.02 || 31
|-
| on Pluto, || Pluto's gravity: || 1.2 || 73 || || || || ||
|-
|at Solar System galactic radius, || the Milky Way's gravity: || 525 || 14,000
|}

==Transcript==
:'''Main Text'''
:Gravity Wells scaled to Earth surface gravity
:This chart shows the "depth" of various solar system gravity wells.
:Each well is scaled such that rising out of a physical well of that depth — in constant Earth surface gravity — would take the same energy as escaping from that planet's gravity in reality.
:Each planet is shown cut in half at the bottom of its well, with the depth of the well measured down to the planet's ''flat'' surface.
:The planet sizes are to the same scale as the wells. Interplanetary distances are not to scale.
:Depth = (G × PlanetMass) / (g × PlanetRadius)
:G = Newton's constant
:g = 9.81 m/s2

:'''Planetary Descriptions'''
:To Sun, very very far down
:Mercury
:Venus
:Earth - 5,478 km
:Moon - 288 km
:Mars - 1,286 km
:Ganymede
:Io
:Jupiter
::[A drawing of a "very deep" gravity well, "Your mom" at the bottom, several member of "local football team" falling down towards her.]
::Jupiter is not much larger than Saturn, but much more massive. At its size, adding more mass just makes it denser due to the extra squeezing of gravity.
::If you dropped a few dozen more Jupiters into it, the pressure would ignite fusion and make it a star.
:Europa
:Titan
::Two figures: Weeoooeeoooeeooo
:Saturn
::Rings
:Uranus
:Neptune
::Megan: An even more glorious dawn awaits!

:'''Mars Inset'''
:[Mars gravity well, the Pathfinder probe on its surface, with its moons Deimos and Phobos as smaller gravity wells.]

:[Figure of a man (to scale) in Deimos's gravity well.]
:You could escape Deimos with a bike and a ramp.

:[Figure of a man (to scale) in Phobos's gravity well.]
:A thrown baseball could escape Phobos.

:'''Earth Inset'''
:[Zoomed-in view of Earth/moon gravity well, featuring the relative locations of the atmosphere, Low Earth Orbit, the International Space Station, the Space Shuttle, GPS satellites, and satellites in geosynchronous orbit.]
:Cueball: This is why it took a huge rocket to get to the moon but only a small one to get back.

:It takes the same amount of energy to launch something on an escape trajectory away from Earth as it would to launch it 6,000 km upward under constant 9.81 m/s2 Earth gravity.

:Hence, Earth's well is 6,000 km deep.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Your Mom]]

Talk:681: Gravity Wells

2014-03-12T15:35:00Z

Chriswampler: Moved table from discussion to main article

Why is Earth's well's depth listed as 5478km but as 6379km in the inset?
Compare with Mars which has 1286 in both places.
[[Special:Contributions/87.174.225.131|87.174.225.131]] 07:21, 12 April 2013 (UTC)
:Best guess is either a goof, or that the lower number is just for Earth itself, while the greater number is for the Earth/Moon system as a whole. Proportionally speaking, we have the largest moon in the solar system, so maybe it wouldn't nicely fit in the Earth well as easily as Mars's and Jupiter's moons do.--[[User:Druid816|Druid816]] ([[User talk:Druid816|talk]]) 08:28, 12 April 2013 (UTC)

: It ''may'' be the height needed to go from one gravity well to another. You don't have to get all the way up to escape speed for that.

: Randall wasn't kidding about the Sun being "very very far down"; its well is 100 times deeper than Jupiter's!
:[[User:Wwoods|Wwoods]] ([[User talk:Wwoods|talk]]) 19:47, 12 April 2013 (UTC)

:: OTOH, from the table above i'm thinking that the 5.4 might be the Venus figure, and it was wrongly placed besides Earth...
:: Secondly, what i found interesting was that the Earth's 6.4 looks so much like its radius! I wonder if it's merely a coincidence, or there's a connection between the two... -- [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.233|141.101.99.233]] 21:25, 30 October 2013 (UTC)

:::The table is great, it must be included in the article; layout and time is just my problem right now. PRO TIP: Do not care about the x-axis.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 22:18, 30 October 2013 (UTC)

681: Gravity Wells

2014-03-12T15:25:13Z

Chriswampler: /* Explanation */ Need explanation for title text

{{comic
| number = 681
| date = December 28, 2009
| title = Gravity Wells
| image = gravity_wells.png
| titletext = This doesn't take into account the energy imparted by orbital motion (or gravity assists or the Oberth effect), all of which can make it easier to reach outer planets.
}}

The xkcd page links to [http://xkcd.com/681_large/ a much larger version].

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Fix Grammar and explain title text}}

The comic shows the relative strengths of the gravitational fields of each planet in the solar system as well as some of their satellites. Each well is scaled such that rising out of a physical well of that depth, in constant Earth surface gravity, would take the same energy as escaping from that planet's gravity in reality. Each planet is shown cut in half at the bottom of its well, with the depth of the well measured down to the planet's flat surface.

This is a simplified method of comparing the escape velocities of the various planets and satellites. In reality, the strength of gravity decreases the further you get from the planet. However, a comparison of energy expended to escape the gravitational pull allows for a simpler comparison between the objects.

Moons shown in the chart are at the appropriate distance from their respective planets' gravity wells for their orbits. Those moons featured are: Earth's moon, Mars' tiny moons Phobos and Deimos (in an inset panel), Jupiter's moons Ganymede, Io, and Europa, and Saturn's moon Titan.

The {{w|Sun|Sun's}} gravity well is not shown in its entirety, but is just indicated on the far left as ''"Very very far down"''. Had it been shown in its full extent it would have made the rest of the drawing so small in comparison that it would have been unreadable.

==== Inner Planets ====

* Mercury -- no facts listed

* Venus -- no facts listed

* Earth & Moon -- listed with the depth of the gravity well of 5,478 km for Earth and 288 km for the Moon. Calculations of depth is explained in the Saturn insert.

* Mars -- listed with the depth of gravity well of 1286 km

==== Cut outs ====

* The Mars cutout shows how small Mars' moons really are, specifically in terms of gravity. {{w|Deimos_(moon)|Deimos}} is so small that a bike jump would be sufficient to escape its gravity well and on {{w|Phobos_(moon)|Phobos}} you could launch a baseball into space simply by throwing it.

* The drawing next to Jupiter is playing on the classic "Yo Mama" joke, combining the aspects of your mom being very fat (having a huge gravitational pull) and very slutty (having sex with the entire football team), represented by the football team being attracted to, and falling into, her gravity well. A "Yo Mama" joke also appears in comic [[89:_Gravitational_Mass|89: Gravitational Mass]].

* The Earth/Moon cut out shows the significant difference in strength between the {{w|gravity well}} of the Earth and the Moon. Cueball comments on how the {{w|Apollo_Lunar_Module|Apollo Lunar Module}} could be so small and still return to Earth while the {{w|Saturn_V}} rocket used to get the moon had to be so huge since it was escaping Earth's well while the Lunar Module only needed to escape the pull of the Moon. The cut out also shows that objects like the {{w|International_Space_Station|International Space Station}}, the {{w|Space_shuttle|space shuttle}}, {{w|GPS_satellite|GPS satellites}} and {{w|Geostationary_orbit|geo-stationary satellites}} at their respective positions within Earth's gravity well.

==== Outer Planets ====

* {{w|Jupiter}} -- is so massive and dense that it is comparable in mass to a {{w|Brown dwarf}} which is the smallest kind of star. Saturn, while similar in size, is composed of much lighter gas material. Hence Saturn's mass and therefore its gravitational pull are much smaller. Strong gravitational pull is a significant factor in igniting fusion. As gravity pulls matter together the pressure and temperature increase. With sufficient increase in pressure and temperature {{w|Nuclear_fusion|nuclear fusion}} begins. Had that happen during creation of our solar system, i.e. had a few dozen times the mass of gasses contained in Jupiter condensed in that location, then we would had two {{w|Sun|Suns}} and our solar system would have been a {{w|Binary_system_(astronomy)|Binary system}}.

* {{w|Titan_(moon)|Titan}} -- The figures on Titan are sirens, a reference to Kurt Vonnegut's ''{{w|The Sirens of Titan}}''.

* {{w|Saturn}} & its rings -- The "Rings" in Saturn's gravity well are {{w|Rings_of_Saturn|Saturn's rings}}. The farther you get from a planet, the weaker the effect of its gravity on you, so, at some point, when climbing out of Saturn's gravity well, you've reached the point equivalent to starting your climb from the rings of Saturn, or, in fact, from specific rings of Saturn. Saturn's rings start fairly near the planet and extend out quite far, therefore multiple stripes are shown in the figure. The rings are also shown in multiple colors and roughly match the observed colors from photos take by the {{w|Cassini–Huygens|Cassini spacecraft}} expedition as it passed Saturn. All of the colors of the planets and moons represent the predominant color of that object as observed from earth.

* {{w|Uranus}} -- notably absent is any "your-anus" jokes.

* {{w|Neptune}} -- Megan's quote is a paraphrase of {{w|Carl_Sagan|Carl Sagan}}'s quote, "...but from a planet orbiting a star in a distant globular cluster, a still more glorious dawn awaits, not a sun-rise, but a galaxy rise." [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSgiXGELjbc Video here]]

==== How to interpret gravity wells ====

To escape a planet's or moon's orbit, you need merely climb to the highest of the two peaks to ''either'' the left or right of the object. So, for example, to escape Venus, you need merely reach the peak left of it, the slope right of it is part of the Sun's gravity well, and shows how much further you'd need to climb out of the Sun's gravity well to get from Venus to Earth. Likewise, the peak left of Jupiter is slightly lower than the one to the right; this is because the rightmost peak includes the difficulty of moving away from the Sun to get to Saturn, the next planet along.

The text explains that the depth of the well is mass-of-planet over radius-of-planet with newtons constant and 9.81 m/s² as constants, where 9.81 m/s² is the acceleration of a free falling body at Earth's gravity.

The calculation for a gravity well is:
:depth = (G * Planet-mass ) / (9.81 m/s2 * Planet-radius)
::where G is {{w|Isaac_Newton|Newton}}'s {{w|Gravitational_constant|gravitational constant}}, and
::9.81 m/s2 is the {{w|Acceleration|acceleration}} rate of a {{w|Gravity_of_Earth|free falling body on earth}} at sea level (g).

==Transcript==
:'''Main Text'''
:Gravity Wells scaled to Earth surface gravity
:This chart shows the "depth" of various solar system gravity wells.
:Each well is scaled such that rising out of a physical well of that depth — in constant Earth surface gravity — would take the same energy as escaping from that planet's gravity in reality.
:Each planet is shown cut in half at the bottom of its well, with the depth of the well measured down to the planet's ''flat'' surface.
:The planet sizes are to the same scale as the wells. Interplanetary distances are not to scale.
:Depth = (G × PlanetMass) / (g × PlanetRadius)
:G = Newton's constant
:g = 9.81 m/s2

:'''Planetary Descriptions'''
:To Sun, very very far down
:Mercury
:Venus
:Earth - 5,478 km
:Moon - 288 km
:Mars - 1,286 km
:Ganymede
:Io
:Jupiter
::[A drawing of a "very deep" gravity well, "Your mom" at the bottom, several member of "local football team" falling down towards her.]
::Jupiter is not much larger than Saturn, but much more massive. At its size, adding more mass just makes it denser due to the extra squeezing of gravity.
::If you dropped a few dozen more Jupiters into it, the pressure would ignite fusion and make it a star.
:Europa
:Titan
::Two figures: Weeoooeeoooeeooo
:Saturn
::Rings
:Uranus
:Neptune
::Megan: An even more glorious dawn awaits!

:'''Mars Inset'''
:[Mars gravity well, the Pathfinder probe on its surface, with its moons Deimos and Phobos as smaller gravity wells.]

:[Figure of a man (to scale) in Deimos's gravity well.]
:You could escape Deimos with a bike and a ramp.

:[Figure of a man (to scale) in Phobos's gravity well.]
:A thrown baseball could escape Phobos.

:'''Earth Inset'''
:[Zoomed-in view of Earth/moon gravity well, featuring the relative locations of the atmosphere, Low Earth Orbit, the International Space Station, the Space Shuttle, GPS satellites, and satellites in geosynchronous orbit.]
:Cueball: This is why it took a huge rocket to get to the moon but only a small one to get back.

:It takes the same amount of energy to launch something on an escape trajectory away from Earth as it would to launch it 6,000 km upward under constant 9.81 m/s2 Earth gravity.

:Hence, Earth's well is 6,000 km deep.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Your Mom]]

681: Gravity Wells

2014-03-12T15:20:24Z

Chriswampler: /* Explanation */ Lots of grammar fixes and some additional explanations. Some layout consistency changes.

{{comic
| number = 681
| date = December 28, 2009
| title = Gravity Wells
| image = gravity_wells.png
| titletext = This doesn't take into account the energy imparted by orbital motion (or gravity assists or the Oberth effect), all of which can make it easier to reach outer planets.
}}

The xkcd page links to [http://xkcd.com/681_large/ a much larger version].

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Fix Grammar}}

The comic shows the relative strengths of the gravitational fields of each planet in the solar system as well as some of their satellites. Each well is scaled such that rising out of a physical well of that depth, in constant Earth surface gravity, would take the same energy as escaping from that planet's gravity in reality. Each planet is shown cut in half at the bottom of its well, with the depth of the well measured down to the planet's flat surface.

This is a simplified method of comparing the escape velocities of the various planets and satellites. In reality, the strength of gravity decreases the further you get from the planet. However, a comparison of energy expended to escape the gravitational pull allows for a simpler comparison between the objects.

Moons shown in the chart are at the appropriate distance from their respective planets' gravity wells for their orbits. Those moons featured are: Earth's moon, Mars' tiny moons Phobos and Deimos (in an inset panel), Jupiter's moons Ganymede, Io, and Europa, and Saturn's moon Titan.

The {{w|Sun|Sun's}} gravity well is not shown in its entirety, but is just indicated on the far left as ''"Very very far down"''. Had it been shown in its full extent it would have made the rest of the drawing so small in comparison that it would have been unreadable.

==== Inner Planets ====

* Mercury -- no facts listed

* Venus -- no facts listed

* Earth & Moon -- listed with the depth of the gravity well of 5,478 km for Earth and 288 km for the Moon. Calculations of depth is explained in the Saturn insert.

* Mars -- listed with the depth of gravity well of 1286 km

==== Cut outs ====

* The Mars cutout shows how small Mars' moons really are, specifically in terms of gravity. {{w|Deimos_(moon)|Deimos}} is so small that a bike jump would be sufficient to escape its gravity well and on {{w|Phobos_(moon)|Phobos}} you could launch a baseball into space simply by throwing it.

* The drawing next to Jupiter is playing on the classic "Yo Mama" joke, combining the aspects of your mom being very fat (having a huge gravitational pull) and very slutty (having sex with the entire football team), represented by the football team being attracted to, and falling into, her gravity well. A "Yo Mama" joke also appears in comic [[89:_Gravitational_Mass|89: Gravitational Mass]].

* The Earth/Moon cut out shows the significant difference in strength between the {{w|gravity well}} of the Earth and the Moon. Cueball comments on how the {{w|Apollo_Lunar_Module|Apollo Lunar Module}} could be so small and still return to Earth while the {{w|Saturn_V}} rocket used to get the moon had to be so huge since it was escaping Earth's well while the Lunar Module only needed to escape the pull of the Moon. The cut out also shows that objects like the {{w|International_Space_Station|International Space Station}}, the {{w|Space_shuttle|space shuttle}}, {{w|GPS_satellite|GPS satellites}} and {{w|Geostationary_orbit|geo-stationary satellites}} at their respective positions within Earth's gravity well.

==== Outer Planets ====

* {{w|Jupiter}} -- is so massive and dense that it is comparable in mass to a {{w|Brown dwarf}} which is the smallest kind of star. Saturn, while similar in size, is composed of much lighter gas material. Hence Saturn's mass and therefore its gravitational pull are much smaller. Strong gravitational pull is a significant factor in igniting fusion. As gravity pulls matter together the pressure and temperature increase. With sufficient increase in pressure and temperature {{w|Nuclear_fusion|nuclear fusion}} begins. Had that happen during creation of our solar system, i.e. had a few dozen times the mass of gasses contained in Jupiter condensed in that location, then we would had two {{w|Sun|Suns}} and our solar system would have been a {{w|Binary_system_(astronomy)|Binary system}}.

* {{w|Titan_(moon)|Titan}} -- The figures on Titan are sirens, a reference to Kurt Vonnegut's ''{{w|The Sirens of Titan}}''.

* {{w|Saturn}} & its rings -- The "Rings" in Saturn's gravity well are {{w|Rings_of_Saturn|Saturn's rings}}. The farther you get from a planet, the weaker the effect of its gravity on you, so, at some point, when climbing out of Saturn's gravity well, you've reached the point equivalent to starting your climb from the rings of Saturn, or, in fact, from specific rings of Saturn. Saturn's rings start fairly near the planet and extend out quite far, therefore multiple stripes are shown in the figure. The rings are also shown in multiple colors and roughly match the observed colors from photos take by the {{w|Cassini–Huygens|Cassini spacecraft}} expedition as it passed Saturn. All of the colors of the planets and moons represent the predominant color of that object as observed from earth.

* {{w|Uranus}} -- notably absent is any "your-anus" jokes.

* {{w|Neptune}} -- Megan's quote is a paraphrase of {{w|Carl_Sagan|Carl Sagan}}'s quote, "...but from a planet orbiting a star in a distant globular cluster, a still more glorious dawn awaits, not a sun-rise, but a galaxy rise." [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSgiXGELjbc Video here]]

==== How to interpret gravity wells ====

To escape a planet's or moon's orbit, you need merely climb to the highest of the two peaks to ''either'' the left or right of the object. So, for example, to escape Venus, you need merely reach the peak left of it, the slope right of it is part of the Sun's gravity well, and shows how much further you'd need to climb out of the Sun's gravity well to get from Venus to Earth. Likewise, the peak left of Jupiter is slightly lower than the one to the right; this is because the rightmost peak includes the difficulty of moving away from the Sun to get to Saturn, the next planet along.

The text explains that the depth of the well is mass-of-planet over radius-of-planet with newtons constant and 9.81 m/s² as constants, where 9.81 m/s² is the acceleration of a free falling body at Earth's gravity.

The calculation for a gravity well is:
:depth = (G * Planet-mass ) / (9.81 m/s2 * Planet-radius)
::where G is {{w|Isaac_Newton|Newton}}'s {{w|Gravitational_constant|gravitational constant}}, and
::9.81 m/s2 is the {{w|Acceleration|acceleration}} rate of a {{w|Gravity_of_Earth|free falling body on earth}} at sea level (g).

==Transcript==
:'''Main Text'''
:Gravity Wells scaled to Earth surface gravity
:This chart shows the "depth" of various solar system gravity wells.
:Each well is scaled such that rising out of a physical well of that depth — in constant Earth surface gravity — would take the same energy as escaping from that planet's gravity in reality.
:Each planet is shown cut in half at the bottom of its well, with the depth of the well measured down to the planet's ''flat'' surface.
:The planet sizes are to the same scale as the wells. Interplanetary distances are not to scale.
:Depth = (G × PlanetMass) / (g × PlanetRadius)
:G = Newton's constant
:g = 9.81 m/s2

:'''Planetary Descriptions'''
:To Sun, very very far down
:Mercury
:Venus
:Earth - 5,478 km
:Moon - 288 km
:Mars - 1,286 km
:Ganymede
:Io
:Jupiter
::[A drawing of a "very deep" gravity well, "Your mom" at the bottom, several member of "local football team" falling down towards her.]
::Jupiter is not much larger than Saturn, but much more massive. At its size, adding more mass just makes it denser due to the extra squeezing of gravity.
::If you dropped a few dozen more Jupiters into it, the pressure would ignite fusion and make it a star.
:Europa
:Titan
::Two figures: Weeoooeeoooeeooo
:Saturn
::Rings
:Uranus
:Neptune
::Megan: An even more glorious dawn awaits!

:'''Mars Inset'''
:[Mars gravity well, the Pathfinder probe on its surface, with its moons Deimos and Phobos as smaller gravity wells.]

:[Figure of a man (to scale) in Deimos's gravity well.]
:You could escape Deimos with a bike and a ramp.

:[Figure of a man (to scale) in Phobos's gravity well.]
:A thrown baseball could escape Phobos.

:'''Earth Inset'''
:[Zoomed-in view of Earth/moon gravity well, featuring the relative locations of the atmosphere, Low Earth Orbit, the International Space Station, the Space Shuttle, GPS satellites, and satellites in geosynchronous orbit.]
:Cueball: This is why it took a huge rocket to get to the moon but only a small one to get back.

:It takes the same amount of energy to launch something on an escape trajectory away from Earth as it would to launch it 6,000 km upward under constant 9.81 m/s2 Earth gravity.

:Hence, Earth's well is 6,000 km deep.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Your Mom]]

153: Cryptography

2014-03-12T12:47:26Z

Chriswampler: /* Explanation */ Added explanation for 'I put my thing down, flitp it and reverse it'

{{comic
| number = 153
| date = September 6, 2006
| title = Cryptography
| image = cryptography.png
| titletext = If you got a big keyspace, let me search it.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Layout is ugly, content has to be verified. Explain the reversal part in Missy Elliott's song.}}
This comic, as the name implies, is relevant to the study of {{w|cryptography}}. At the podium, [[Cueball]] is describing a proposed crypto system (a computer program that turns a very large number, called the "{{w|key (cryptography)|key}}", and a message into an encrypted form that can only be read by using the same key), based on the model of a {{w|Feistel cipher}}. Part of any Feistel cipher is the "round function", which determines how the key is applied to the original message; this is applied multiple times with a variety of tricks and techniques to insure the process can eventually be reversed. One common component of round functions is the {{w|S-box}}, a simple table that converts input bytes into output bytes, preferably in a way that doesn't correspond to any mathematical rules.

Here, the S-box would be implemented by doing the following (with the computer operation actually shown in the diagrams indicated in parentheses):

#Take the bitstring down (roll right by 1)
#Flip it (take its binary NOT)
#Reverse it (run the bits in the opposite order)

This would be run on each round of the cipher to further scramble the message for the next round. As the caption implies, the steps are based on a line from the {{w|Missy Elliott}} song ''{{w|Work It (Missy Elliott song)|Work It}}'': '''"I put my thing down, flip it and reverse it."''' As with any encryption system there must be a way to decrypt the cipher text. In Missy Elliott's song, the phrase "I put my thing down, flip it and reverse, it" is repeatedly played backward, sounding like gibberish. In the same way, a steps to a feistel cipher based algorithm are executed in reverse to obtain the original plain text from a cipher text.

The {{w|Key space (cryptography)|keyspace}} for a cryptographic algorithm is the number of possible keys the algorithm can possibly accept. For example, {{w|Advanced Encryption Standard|AES-256}} has a keyspace of 2256 (roughly 1.1579209e+77) possible keys, simply because the algorithm specifies that each key is 256 bits wide. The title text is referring to "searching a keyspace", which is to say, simply trying every key until you find one that works. (For reference, a computer would require roughly the energy of a billion billion supernovas to even count to 2256, let alone actually try each one.) The precise wording "If you got a big keyspace, let me search it" is, of course, another reference to the same song: "If you got a big **** let me search ya" (The word "penis" is censored by the trumpeting of an elephant).

===Inside references and real life shenanigans===

Cueball is banned from multiple conferences for similar pranks in [[541: TED Talk]]. In response to 541, {{w|PyCon}} organizers jokingly [http://pycon.blogspot.com/2009/02/randall-munroe.html announced] that Randall Munroe was banned from PyCon 2009 due to "last year's disgraceful keynote, 'Web Spiders vs. Red Spiders'." They also said they instructed their volunteers to refuse admission to him and "any stick figures who may attempt to register, particularly if they are wearing hats."

Messages on the PyCon-Organizers mailing list show that this joke was intended to get Randall to come to PyCon: (The links will only work if you're subscribed to the mailing list.)
:PyCon mentioned briefly in today's xkcd:
:http://xkcd.com/541/
:We've still never gotten Randall Munroe to actually attend, have we? Anybody want to take charge of twisting his arm this time? I think we can still offer him a "press pass" (free registration). [...] [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011224.html]
::An invite would seem most appropriate given the cartoon. :-)
::We could also have an official PyCon blog post confirming his ban... [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011225.html]
:::How about a public blog post LIFTING the ban and inviting him? [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011226.html]
::::Confirming the ban is far funnier... He's definitely a disturbing influence on programmers. [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011227.html]
:::::Agreed, especially if we invite him concurrently with confirming the ban. [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011239.html]
:::::(a few posts later)
:::::I'm happy to participate in actually throwing some thin guy out of the conference, and then get some graphics savvy person to animate a stick figure over that. :) [...][http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011274.html]
::::::here's a rough idea of what would show up if you invited him to actually do any speaking...
::::::http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJOS0sV2a24
::::::it's fairly long. he shows up in the beginning around 3:25. [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011275.html]
:::::::For the record, I did try to convince him to come when got the art for the tshirt last year. He didn't seem super psyched, but then again emotions are hard to read via IRC.
:::::::I love the idea of "officially" banning him, however. ;-) [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011241.html]
::::::::(a few posts later)
::::::::OK - posted to the PyCon blog, by the power vested in me as publicity chair. With Michael Foord's excellent sentence added.
::::::::Now let him know that since he's banned, he HAS to come. [http://mail.python.org/mailman/private/pycon-organizers/2009-February/011251.html]

==Transcript==
:[Cueball at a podium.]
:Cueball: My cryptosystem is like any Feistel cipher, except in the S-Boxes we simply take the bitstring down, flip it, and reverse it.
:I've been barred from speaking at any major cryptography conferences ever since it became clear that all my algorithms were just thinly disguised Missy Elliot songs.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Public speaking]]
[[Category:Banned from conferences]]

1037: Umwelt

2014-03-10T23:48:16Z

Chriswampler: Accidentally included some text twice while editing trivia section

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| image = umwelt_the_void.jpg
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day, although only one is seen.

Information about how the wide variety of data was collected and credit for the viewers who contributed can be found [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/rnst4/april_fools_xkcd_changing_comic/ here].

===The Void===
[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===
[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===
[[File:umwelt_snake_composite_1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt_snake_composite.png|Full size]]

The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Specific AltText for this image: Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit -from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your browser window size.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===
[[File:umwelt_tortoise_1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt_tortoise.png|Full size]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority. It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===
[[File:umwelt_too_quiet_1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt_too_quiet.png|Full size]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===
[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===
[[File:umwelt_galaxies_1024.jpg]]
[[:File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg|Full size]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===
[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===
[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "{{w|Harrison Bergeron}}."

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===
[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [[Self Description]] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===
[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===
[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic.

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===
[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===
[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser.

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===
[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece. However, the piece in question cannot possibly line up with any corner.

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers.

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===
[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===
[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===
[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===
[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

{{w|Rockmelt}} is a social-media-based browser.

Reference to the gospel song {{w|Longing for Old Virginia: Their Complete Victor Recordings (1934)|"There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family}}, later covered by Stephen Stills.

:I run to the rock just to hide my face
:And the rocks cried out, no hiding place
:There's no hiding place down here

It may additionally be a reference to the ''Babylon 5'' episode "And the Rock Cried Out, No Hiding Place," which featured the song.

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===
[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===
[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===
[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===
[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===
[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===
[[File:umwelt_france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm][http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===
[[File:umwelt_germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===
[[File:umwelt_israel.png]]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===
[[File:umwelt_japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===
[[File:umwelt_uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===
[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===
[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===
[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===
[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===
[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicopter Hunting===
[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have {{w|Wolf hunting#North America 2|shot wolves en masse from helicopters}} in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted as they are sought mainly for their pelts.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===
[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===
[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' and/or {{w|Chain of Command (Star Trek: The Next Generation)|popular homage to it via Star Trek}}: "There are four lights."[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. Smith is an all-girls college.

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

Wellesley is an all-girls college.

===Giant Box Trap===
[[File:umwelt_box_trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===
[[File:umwelt_chemo.jpg]]

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==
:[Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given.]

:'''The Void'''
:[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

:'''Aurora'''
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?
:Megan: Hockey's on.
:Cueball: Ok. Later.

:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

:Megan: See anything?
:Cueball: No, just clouds.
:Megan: Not surprised.

:'''Aurora-US'''
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
:Megan: It's cold out.
:Cueball: Ok. Later.

:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

:Megan: See anything?
:Cueball: No, just clouds.
:Megan: Not surprised.

:'''Snake'''
:[Two people standing next to each other. Megan is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

:Megan: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

:'''Black hat'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat. The other is an analyst. Black Hat has a number of terminals attached to his head.]
:Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

:Black Hat: It '''knows''' what it did.

:[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

:'''Too quiet'''
:[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]
:Person 1: It's quiet.

:Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

:[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]
:Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

:Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.
:Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

:'''Pond'''
:[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

:'''Galaxies'''
:[A trio of galaxies.]
:Galaxy 1: He's not looking!
:Galaxy 3: Let's get him!
:[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]
:Cueball: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?
:Megan: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

:'''xkcd Gold'''
:[Cueball holding bat.]

:Cueball: Sorry, but this comic

:[Cueball starts to wind up.]

:Cueball: requires

:[Cueball prepares to strike with bat.]

:Cueball: XKCD

:[Cueball swings at a beehive.]
:GOLD

:[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

:'''Yo mamma'''
:[Cueball yells at a friend.]
:Cueball: Oh yeah? Well you mama's so ''cynical'', her only dog ballast is a ''leash''!
:(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights.)

:'''Reddit'''
:Five seconds ago:
:[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread.]
:You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

:Now: [An image of the xkcd comic page.]
:Five seconds from now:

:You: ..hey

:30 seconds from now:
:[DANCE PARTY!]

:'''Buns and Hot dogs'''
:Cueball: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?
:[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

:'''Twitter'''
:[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse ebooks.]

:'''Wikipedia'''
:[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on The Mile High Club.]

:'''Google Chrome'''
:[A Chrome plugin error page.]
:Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

:'''Chrome/Firefox'''
:[Two people; Cueball is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]
:Cueball: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.
:Ponytail: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.
:Cueball: Oh? What's it called?
:Ponytail: "Firefox".

:'''Google Chrome-2'''
:[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]
:Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

:'''Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing'''
:[Firefox error page.]
:Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you
:[Button with text.]
:Click here to report this incident.

:'''Internet Explorer'''
:[IE error page.]
:IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

:'''Maxthon'''
:Cueball: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

:'''Netscape Navigator'''
:[Two different versions exist: one with Cueball talking and one with Megan with tentacle arms talking.]
:Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

:'''Rockmelt'''
:[Cueball running to laptop.]
:I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

:[Cueball sitting at laptop.]
:But Rockmelt cried out -

:[Laptop shouting.]
:NO HIDING PLACE

:[zoom out.]
:NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

:'''Google Chrome-3'''
:[A chrome plugin error page.]
:Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there '''ever''' exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

:'''Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome'''
:[Chrome error page.]
:Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox'''
:[Firefox error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Microsoft/The Times'''
:[Error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Corporate - Generic '''
:[Error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Military'''
:[Person looking at two browser windows.]
:Cueball: I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

:'''T-Mobile'''
:[Error page.]
:Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

:'''Verizon'''
:[Error page]
:Error: You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

:'''France'''
:[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]
:Cueball: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?
:French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

:French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down Europe for over a decade.

:[Beat frame.]

:Cueball: Touche.
:French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

:'''Germany'''
:[Cueball dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]
:June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.
:Cueball on chairlift: Food!

:'''Israel'''
:[Person on phone.]
:Person (Translation from Hebrew): Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

:'''Carnot Cycle'''
:[Ponytail on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]
:Ponytail: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!
:Cueball: Neat - how fast does it go?
:Ponytail: Depends how cold it is outside.

:'''Great Britain'''
:[Illustration of the Atlantic ocean.]
:American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most ''important'' US states.
:British person: Hey - At least we have free health care and real ale.

:'''Earthquake-Blizzard'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..
:[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]
:Danish: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof - ''AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!''
:Cueball: Come on - it's only three more miles.

:'''Earthquake-Tornado'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!
:Cueball: That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..
:[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]
:Danish: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!
:Cueball: Say the magic words...
:Danish: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!
:Cueball: Thank you.

:'''Earthquake-Hurricane'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!
:Cueball: That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..

:[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Danish is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]
:Danish: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!
:Cueball: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

:'''Lake Diver Killer'''
:[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]
:Reporter: Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered the body of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer."
:Reporter: During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

:'''Washington'''
:[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]
:In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour
:The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln
:Are entombed forever.

:'''Alaska'''
:[A person with a gun chasing a helicopter on the back of a wolf in a snowy Alaskan field.]
:Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

:'''Life in lab'''
:[Newspaper headline.]
:Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab
:[Caption under picture of scientists.]
:"The trick was fuckin'"

:'''American Revolution'''
:Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

:'''MIT'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: I see their admission standards have been slipping.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''MIT Course 15c'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''Smith/Wellesley'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''CNU'''
:[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]
:I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

:'''Dana Farber'''
:[Cueball, pointing towards head.]
:Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, I shaved my head.
:Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.

*The transcript section for this comic also included a note alluding to its extreme length:
: [ [Two people...] ] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))
: [Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake...

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Danish]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

1037: Umwelt

2014-03-10T23:44:20Z

Chriswampler: /* Trivia */

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| image = umwelt_the_void.jpg
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day, although only one is seen.

Information about how the wide variety of data was collected and credit for the viewers who contributed can be found [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/rnst4/april_fools_xkcd_changing_comic/ here].

===The Void===
[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===
[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===
[[File:umwelt_snake_composite_1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt_snake_composite.png|Full size]]

The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Specific AltText for this image: Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit -from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your browser window size.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===
[[File:umwelt_tortoise_1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt_tortoise.png|Full size]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority. It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===
[[File:umwelt_too_quiet_1024.png]]
[[:File:umwelt_too_quiet.png|Full size]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===
[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===
[[File:umwelt_galaxies_1024.jpg]]
[[:File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg|Full size]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===
[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===
[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "{{w|Harrison Bergeron}}."

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===
[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [[Self Description]] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===
[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===
[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic.

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===
[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===
[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser.

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===
[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece. However, the piece in question cannot possibly line up with any corner.

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers.

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===
[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===
[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===
[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===
[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

{{w|Rockmelt}} is a social-media-based browser.

Reference to the gospel song {{w|Longing for Old Virginia: Their Complete Victor Recordings (1934)|"There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family}}, later covered by Stephen Stills.

:I run to the rock just to hide my face
:And the rocks cried out, no hiding place
:There's no hiding place down here

It may additionally be a reference to the ''Babylon 5'' episode "And the Rock Cried Out, No Hiding Place," which featured the song.

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===
[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===
[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===
[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===
[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===
[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===
[[File:umwelt_france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm][http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===
[[File:umwelt_germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===
[[File:umwelt_israel.png]]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===
[[File:umwelt_japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===
[[File:umwelt_uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===
[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===
[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===
[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===
[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===
[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicopter Hunting===
[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have {{w|Wolf hunting#North America 2|shot wolves en masse from helicopters}} in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted as they are sought mainly for their pelts.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===
[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===
[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' and/or {{w|Chain of Command (Star Trek: The Next Generation)|popular homage to it via Star Trek}}: "There are four lights."[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. Smith is an all-girls college.

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

Wellesley is an all-girls college.

===Giant Box Trap===
[[File:umwelt_box_trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===
[[File:umwelt_chemo.jpg]]

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==
:[Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given.]

:'''The Void'''
:[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

:'''Aurora'''
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?
:Megan: Hockey's on.
:Cueball: Ok. Later.

:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

:Megan: See anything?
:Cueball: No, just clouds.
:Megan: Not surprised.

:'''Aurora-US'''
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
:Megan: It's cold out.
:Cueball: Ok. Later.

:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

:Megan: See anything?
:Cueball: No, just clouds.
:Megan: Not surprised.

:'''Snake'''
:[Two people standing next to each other. Megan is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

:Megan: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

:'''Black hat'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat. The other is an analyst. Black Hat has a number of terminals attached to his head.]
:Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

:Black Hat: It '''knows''' what it did.

:[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

:'''Too quiet'''
:[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]
:Person 1: It's quiet.

:Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

:[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]
:Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

:Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.
:Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

:'''Pond'''
:[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

:'''Galaxies'''
:[A trio of galaxies.]
:Galaxy 1: He's not looking!
:Galaxy 3: Let's get him!
:[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]
:Cueball: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?
:Megan: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

:'''xkcd Gold'''
:[Cueball holding bat.]

:Cueball: Sorry, but this comic

:[Cueball starts to wind up.]

:Cueball: requires

:[Cueball prepares to strike with bat.]

:Cueball: XKCD

:[Cueball swings at a beehive.]
:GOLD

:[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

:'''Yo mamma'''
:[Cueball yells at a friend.]
:Cueball: Oh yeah? Well you mama's so ''cynical'', her only dog ballast is a ''leash''!
:(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights.)

:'''Reddit'''
:Five seconds ago:
:[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread.]
:You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

:Now: [An image of the xkcd comic page.]
:Five seconds from now:

:You: ..hey

:30 seconds from now:
:[DANCE PARTY!]

:'''Buns and Hot dogs'''
:Cueball: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?
:[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

:'''Twitter'''
:[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse ebooks.]

:'''Wikipedia'''
:[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on The Mile High Club.]

:'''Google Chrome'''
:[A Chrome plugin error page.]
:Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

:'''Chrome/Firefox'''
:[Two people; Cueball is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]
:Cueball: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.
:Ponytail: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.
:Cueball: Oh? What's it called?
:Ponytail: "Firefox".

:'''Google Chrome-2'''
:[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]
:Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

:'''Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing'''
:[Firefox error page.]
:Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you
:[Button with text.]
:Click here to report this incident.

:'''Internet Explorer'''
:[IE error page.]
:IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

:'''Maxthon'''
:Cueball: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

:'''Netscape Navigator'''
:[Two different versions exist: one with Cueball talking and one with Megan with tentacle arms talking.]
:Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

:'''Rockmelt'''
:[Cueball running to laptop.]
:I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

:[Cueball sitting at laptop.]
:But Rockmelt cried out -

:[Laptop shouting.]
:NO HIDING PLACE

:[zoom out.]
:NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

:'''Google Chrome-3'''
:[A chrome plugin error page.]
:Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there '''ever''' exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

:'''Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome'''
:[Chrome error page.]
:Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox'''
:[Firefox error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Microsoft/The Times'''
:[Error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Corporate - Generic '''
:[Error page.]
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.

:'''Military'''
:[Person looking at two browser windows.]
:Cueball: I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

:'''T-Mobile'''
:[Error page.]
:Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

:'''Verizon'''
:[Error page]
:Error: You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

:'''France'''
:[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]
:Cueball: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?
:French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

:French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down Europe for over a decade.

:[Beat frame.]

:Cueball: Touche.
:French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

:'''Germany'''
:[Cueball dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]
:June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.
:Cueball on chairlift: Food!

:'''Israel'''
:[Person on phone.]
:Person (Translation from Hebrew): Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

:'''Carnot Cycle'''
:[Ponytail on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]
:Ponytail: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!
:Cueball: Neat - how fast does it go?
:Ponytail: Depends how cold it is outside.

:'''Great Britain'''
:[Illustration of the Atlantic ocean.]
:American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most ''important'' US states.
:British person: Hey - At least we have free health care and real ale.

:'''Earthquake-Blizzard'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..
:[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]
:Danish: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof - ''AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!''
:Cueball: Come on - it's only three more miles.

:'''Earthquake-Tornado'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!
:Cueball: That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..
:[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]
:Danish: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!
:Cueball: Say the magic words...
:Danish: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!
:Cueball: Thank you.

:'''Earthquake-Hurricane'''
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!
:Cueball: What!
:Danish: You'll get it..

:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

:Cueball: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!
:Cueball: That was huge!
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...

:Six Months Later..

:[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Danish is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]
:Danish: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!
:Cueball: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

:'''Lake Diver Killer'''
:[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]
:Reporter: Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered the body of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer."
:Reporter: During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

:'''Washington'''
:[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]
:In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour
:The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln
:Are entombed forever.

:'''Alaska'''
:[A person with a gun chasing a helicopter on the back of a wolf in a snowy Alaskan field.]
:Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

:'''Life in lab'''
:[Newspaper headline.]
:Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab
:[Caption under picture of scientists.]
:"The trick was fuckin'"

:'''American Revolution'''
:Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

:'''MIT'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: I see their admission standards have been slipping.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''MIT Course 15c'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''Smith/Wellesley'''
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]
:Cueball: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.
:Hairy: We'll be rich!

:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]

:[The gears turn..]

:Student: Five. There are five cards.
:Cueball: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.

:'''CNU'''
:[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]
:I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

:'''Dana Farber'''
:[Cueball, pointing towards head.]
:Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, I shaved my head.
:Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.

*The transcript section for this comic also included a note alluding to its extreme length:
: [ [Two people...] ] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))
: [Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake...

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Danish]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

User:Chriswampler

2014-03-10T12:54:40Z

Chriswampler: Created page with "Just annoyed that when I didn't have anything here my username showed up a as a red link for the site. So I decided to create a page for myself. Now you know something abou..."

Just annoyed that when I didn't have anything here my username showed up a as a red link for the site.

So I decided to create a page for myself.

Now you know something about me. :)

1037: Umwelt

2014-02-27T16:37:12Z

Chriswampler: Removed very large composite picture in favor of individual images with explanations

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| image = umwelt_the_void.jpg
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|umwelt|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day (although only one is seen).

*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.

Information about how the wide variety of data was collected and credit for the viewers who contributed can be found [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/rnst4/april_fools_xkcd_changing_comic/ here].

===The Void===

[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===

[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===

[[File:umwelt_snake_composite.png]]

The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Specific AltText for this image: Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit --from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your browser window size.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===

[[File:umwelt_tortoise.png]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority.
It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===

[[File:umwelt_too_quiet.png]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===

[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===

[[File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===

[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===

[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "Harrison Bergeron"[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_Bergeron]]

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===

[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/688:_Self-Description Self Description] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===

[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===

[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===

[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===

[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===

[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===

[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===

[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===

[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===

[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===

[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===

[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

Rockmelt is a social-media-based browser [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rockmelt]

Reference to "There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family, later covered by Stephen Stills [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Longing_for_Old_Virginia:_Their_Complete_Victor_Recordings_%281934%29]

I run to the rock just to hide my face

And the rocks cried out, no hiding place

There's no hiding place down here

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===

[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===

[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===

[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===

[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===

[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===

[[File:umwelt_france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm]

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===

[[File:umwelt_germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===

[[File:umwelt_israel.png]]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===

[[File:umwelt_japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===

[[File:umwelt_uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===

[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===

[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicoptor Hunting===

[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have shot wolves en masse from helicopters[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_hunting#North_America_2] in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted (sought mainly for their pelts); and this consumes extra resources such as fuel.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===

[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===

[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' (and/or popular homage to it via Star Trek: "There are four lights") [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chain_of_Command_%28Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation%29][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. (Smith is an all-girls college.)

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

(Wellesley is an all-girls college.)

===Giant Box Trap===

[[File:umwelt_box_trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===

[[File:umwelt_chemo.jpg]]

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==

{Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given}

[Two people...] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))

===The Void===
[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

===Aurora===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?

Person 2: Hockey's on.

Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

===Snake===
[Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

Person holding snake head: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

===Black hat===
[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat Guy. The other is an analyst. Black Hat Guy has a number of terminals attached to his head.]

Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

Black Hat Guy: It *knows* what it did.

[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

===Too quiet===
[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]

Person 1: It's quiet.

Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]

Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.

Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

===Pond===
[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

===Galaxies===
[A trio of galaxies.]

Galaxy 1: He's not looking!

Galaxy 3: Let's get him!

[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]

Person 1: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?

Person 2: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

===xkcd Gold/Beehive part 1===

[Person holding bat.]

Person: Sorry, but this comic

[Person starts to wind up.]

requires

[Person prepares to strike with bat.]

XKCD

[Person swings at a beehive.]

GOLD

===Beehive part 2===
[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

===Yo mamma===
[Person yells at another person.]

Person 1;Oh yeah? Well you mama's so *cynical*, her only dog ballast is a *leash*!

(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights)

===Reddit===
Five seconds ago:

[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread]

You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

Now: [An image of this very page]

Five seconds from now:

You: ..hey

30 seconds from now:

[DANCE PARTY!]

===Buns and Hot dogs===

Person: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?

[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

===Twitter===
[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse_ebooks.]

===Wikipedia===
[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on "The Mile High Club"]

===Google Chrome===
[A Chrome plugin error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

===Chrome/Firefox===
[Two people; one is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]

Person 1: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.

Person 2: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.

Person 1: Oh? What's it called?

Person 2: "Firefox".

===Google Chrome-2===
[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]

Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[Firefox error page.]

Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you

[button with text]

click here to report this incident.

===Internet Explorer===
[IE error page]

IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

===Maxthon===
Person: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

===Netscape Navigator===
[Person with tentacle arms.]

Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

===Rockmelt===
[Person running to laptop.]

I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

[Person sitting at laptop.]

But Rockmelt cried out -

[Laptop shouting]

NO HIDING PLACE

[zoom out]

NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

===Google Chrome-3===
[A chrome plugin error page.]

Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there *ever* exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

===Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome===
[Chrome error page.]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Military===
[Person looking at two browser windows.]

I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

===T-Mobile===
[Error page]

Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

===Verizon===
[Error page]

Error; You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

===France===
[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]

Person 1: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?

French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down europe for over a decade.

[beat]

Person 1: Touche.

French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

===Germany===
[A person dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]

June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.

Person on chairlift: Food!

===Israel===
[Person on phone]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

===Carnot Cycle===
[Person on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]

Person 1: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!

Person 2: Neat -- how fast does it go?

Person 1: Depends how cold it is outside.

===Great Britain===
[Illustration of the atlantic ocean.]

American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most *important* US states.

British person: Hey -- At least we have free health care and real ale.

===Earthquake-Blizzard===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What!

Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*... Six Months Later..

[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]

Person 2: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof -- AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!

Person 1: Come on - it's only three more miles.

===Earthquake-Tornado===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!

That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]

Person 2: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!

Person 1: Say the magic words...

Person 2: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!

Person 1: Thank you.

===Lake Diver Killer===
[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]

Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered thebody of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer" During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

===Washington===
[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]

In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln Are entombed forever.

===Alaska===
[A snowy Alaskan field.]

Person: Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

===Life in lab===
[Newspaper headline.]

Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab

[caption under picture of scientists.]

"The trick was fuckin'"

===American Revolution===
Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

===MIT===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I see their admission standards have been slipping.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===MIT Course 15c===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===Smith/Wellesley===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===CNU===
[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]

I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

===Dana Farber===
[Cueball, pointing towards head.]

Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, i shaved my head.

Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

===Earthquake-Hurricane===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Person 2 is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]

Person 2: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!

Person 1: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

===Corporate===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox===
[Firefox error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/The Times===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Aurora-US===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
Person 2: It's cold out.
Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

1037: Umwelt

2014-02-27T16:28:43Z

Chriswampler: Updated explanation with some source information

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| before = [[#Explanation|↓ Skip to explanation ↓]]
| image = umwelt.png
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|umwelt|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day (although only one is seen).

*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.

Information about how the wide variety of data was collected and credit for the viewers who contributed can be found [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/rnst4/april_fools_xkcd_changing_comic/ here].

===The Void===

[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===

[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===

[[File:umwelt_snake_composite.png]]

The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Specific AltText for this image: Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit --from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your browser window size.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===

[[File:umwelt_tortoise.png]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority.
It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===

[[File:umwelt_too_quiet.png]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===

[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===

[[File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===

[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===

[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "Harrison Bergeron"[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_Bergeron]]

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===

[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/688:_Self-Description Self Description] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===

[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===

[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===

[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===

[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===

[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===

[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===

[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===

[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===

[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===

[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===

[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

Rockmelt is a social-media-based browser [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rockmelt]

Reference to "There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family, later covered by Stephen Stills [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Longing_for_Old_Virginia:_Their_Complete_Victor_Recordings_%281934%29]

I run to the rock just to hide my face

And the rocks cried out, no hiding place

There's no hiding place down here

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===

[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===

[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===

[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===

[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===

[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===

[[File:umwelt_france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm]

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===

[[File:umwelt_germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===

[[File:umwelt_israel.png]]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===

[[File:umwelt_japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===

[[File:umwelt_uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===

[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===

[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicoptor Hunting===

[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have shot wolves en masse from helicopters[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_hunting#North_America_2] in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted (sought mainly for their pelts); and this consumes extra resources such as fuel.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===

[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===

[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' (and/or popular homage to it via Star Trek: "There are four lights") [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chain_of_Command_%28Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation%29][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. (Smith is an all-girls college.)

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

(Wellesley is an all-girls college.)

===Giant Box Trap===

[[File:umwelt_box_trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===

[[File:umwelt_chemo.jpg]]

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==

{Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given}

[Two people...] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))

===The Void===
[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

===Aurora===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?

Person 2: Hockey's on.

Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

===Snake===
[Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

Person holding snake head: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

===Black hat===
[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat Guy. The other is an analyst. Black Hat Guy has a number of terminals attached to his head.]

Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

Black Hat Guy: It *knows* what it did.

[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

===Too quiet===
[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]

Person 1: It's quiet.

Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]

Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.

Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

===Pond===
[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

===Galaxies===
[A trio of galaxies.]

Galaxy 1: He's not looking!

Galaxy 3: Let's get him!

[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]

Person 1: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?

Person 2: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

===xkcd Gold/Beehive part 1===

[Person holding bat.]

Person: Sorry, but this comic

[Person starts to wind up.]

requires

[Person prepares to strike with bat.]

XKCD

[Person swings at a beehive.]

GOLD

===Beehive part 2===
[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

===Yo mamma===
[Person yells at another person.]

Person 1;Oh yeah? Well you mama's so *cynical*, her only dog ballast is a *leash*!

(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights)

===Reddit===
Five seconds ago:

[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread]

You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

Now: [An image of this very page]

Five seconds from now:

You: ..hey

30 seconds from now:

[DANCE PARTY!]

===Buns and Hot dogs===

Person: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?

[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

===Twitter===
[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse_ebooks.]

===Wikipedia===
[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on "The Mile High Club"]

===Google Chrome===
[A Chrome plugin error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

===Chrome/Firefox===
[Two people; one is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]

Person 1: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.

Person 2: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.

Person 1: Oh? What's it called?

Person 2: "Firefox".

===Google Chrome-2===
[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]

Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[Firefox error page.]

Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you

[button with text]

click here to report this incident.

===Internet Explorer===
[IE error page]

IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

===Maxthon===
Person: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

===Netscape Navigator===
[Person with tentacle arms.]

Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

===Rockmelt===
[Person running to laptop.]

I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

[Person sitting at laptop.]

But Rockmelt cried out -

[Laptop shouting]

NO HIDING PLACE

[zoom out]

NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

===Google Chrome-3===
[A chrome plugin error page.]

Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there *ever* exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

===Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome===
[Chrome error page.]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Military===
[Person looking at two browser windows.]

I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

===T-Mobile===
[Error page]

Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

===Verizon===
[Error page]

Error; You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

===France===
[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]

Person 1: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?

French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down europe for over a decade.

[beat]

Person 1: Touche.

French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

===Germany===
[A person dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]

June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.

Person on chairlift: Food!

===Israel===
[Person on phone]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

===Carnot Cycle===
[Person on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]

Person 1: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!

Person 2: Neat -- how fast does it go?

Person 1: Depends how cold it is outside.

===Great Britain===
[Illustration of the atlantic ocean.]

American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most *important* US states.

British person: Hey -- At least we have free health care and real ale.

===Earthquake-Blizzard===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What!

Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*... Six Months Later..

[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]

Person 2: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof -- AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!

Person 1: Come on - it's only three more miles.

===Earthquake-Tornado===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!

That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]

Person 2: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!

Person 1: Say the magic words...

Person 2: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!

Person 1: Thank you.

===Lake Diver Killer===
[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]

Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered thebody of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer" During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

===Washington===
[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]

In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln Are entombed forever.

===Alaska===
[A snowy Alaskan field.]

Person: Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

===Life in lab===
[Newspaper headline.]

Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab

[caption under picture of scientists.]

"The trick was fuckin'"

===American Revolution===
Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

===MIT===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I see their admission standards have been slipping.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===MIT Course 15c===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===Smith/Wellesley===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===CNU===
[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]

I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

===Dana Farber===
[Cueball, pointing towards head.]

Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, i shaved my head.

Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

===Earthquake-Hurricane===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Person 2 is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]

Person 2: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!

Person 1: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

===Corporate===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox===
[Firefox error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/The Times===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Aurora-US===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
Person 2: It's cold out.
Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

1037: Umwelt

2014-02-27T16:19:08Z

Chriswampler: /* Snake */

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| before = [[#Explanation|↓ Skip to explanation ↓]]
| image = umwelt.png
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|umwelt|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day (although only one is seen).

===The Void===

[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===

[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===

[[File:umwelt_snake_composite.png]]

The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===

[[File:umwelt_tortoise.png]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority.
It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===

[[File:umwelt_too_quiet.png]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===

[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===

[[File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===

[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===

[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "Harrison Bergeron"[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_Bergeron]]

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===

[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/688:_Self-Description Self Description] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===

[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===

[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===

[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===

[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===

[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===

[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===

[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===

[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===

[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===

[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===

[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

Rockmelt is a social-media-based browser [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rockmelt]

Reference to "There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family, later covered by Stephen Stills [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Longing_for_Old_Virginia:_Their_Complete_Victor_Recordings_%281934%29]

I run to the rock just to hide my face

And the rocks cried out, no hiding place

There's no hiding place down here

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===

[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===

[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===

[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===

[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===

[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===

[[File:umwelt_france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm]

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===

[[File:umwelt_germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===

[[File:umwelt_israel.png]]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===

[[File:umwelt_japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===

[[File:umwelt_uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===

[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===

[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicoptor Hunting===

[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have shot wolves en masse from helicopters[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_hunting#North_America_2] in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted (sought mainly for their pelts); and this consumes extra resources such as fuel.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===

[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===

[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' (and/or popular homage to it via Star Trek: "There are four lights") [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chain_of_Command_%28Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation%29][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. (Smith is an all-girls college.)

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

(Wellesley is an all-girls college.)

===Giant Box Trap===

[[File:umwelt_box_trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===

[[File:umwelt_chemo.jpg]]

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==

{Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given}

[Two people...] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))

===The Void===
[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

===Aurora===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?

Person 2: Hockey's on.

Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

===Snake===
[Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

Person holding snake head: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

===Black hat===
[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat Guy. The other is an analyst. Black Hat Guy has a number of terminals attached to his head.]

Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

Black Hat Guy: It *knows* what it did.

[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

===Too quiet===
[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]

Person 1: It's quiet.

Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]

Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.

Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

===Pond===
[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

===Galaxies===
[A trio of galaxies.]

Galaxy 1: He's not looking!

Galaxy 3: Let's get him!

[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]

Person 1: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?

Person 2: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

===xkcd Gold/Beehive part 1===

[Person holding bat.]

Person: Sorry, but this comic

[Person starts to wind up.]

requires

[Person prepares to strike with bat.]

XKCD

[Person swings at a beehive.]

GOLD

===Beehive part 2===
[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

===Yo mamma===
[Person yells at another person.]

Person 1;Oh yeah? Well you mama's so *cynical*, her only dog ballast is a *leash*!

(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights)

===Reddit===
Five seconds ago:

[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread]

You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

Now: [An image of this very page]

Five seconds from now:

You: ..hey

30 seconds from now:

[DANCE PARTY!]

===Buns and Hot dogs===

Person: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?

[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

===Twitter===
[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse_ebooks.]

===Wikipedia===
[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on "The Mile High Club"]

===Google Chrome===
[A Chrome plugin error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

===Chrome/Firefox===
[Two people; one is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]

Person 1: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.

Person 2: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.

Person 1: Oh? What's it called?

Person 2: "Firefox".

===Google Chrome-2===
[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]

Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[Firefox error page.]

Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you

[button with text]

click here to report this incident.

===Internet Explorer===
[IE error page]

IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

===Maxthon===
Person: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

===Netscape Navigator===
[Person with tentacle arms.]

Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

===Rockmelt===
[Person running to laptop.]

I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

[Person sitting at laptop.]

But Rockmelt cried out -

[Laptop shouting]

NO HIDING PLACE

[zoom out]

NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

===Google Chrome-3===
[A chrome plugin error page.]

Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there *ever* exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

===Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome===
[Chrome error page.]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Military===
[Person looking at two browser windows.]

I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

===T-Mobile===
[Error page]

Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

===Verizon===
[Error page]

Error; You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

===France===
[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]

Person 1: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?

French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down europe for over a decade.

[beat]

Person 1: Touche.

French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

===Germany===
[A person dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]

June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.

Person on chairlift: Food!

===Israel===
[Person on phone]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

===Carnot Cycle===
[Person on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]

Person 1: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!

Person 2: Neat -- how fast does it go?

Person 1: Depends how cold it is outside.

===Great Britain===
[Illustration of the atlantic ocean.]

American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most *important* US states.

British person: Hey -- At least we have free health care and real ale.

===Earthquake-Blizzard===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What!

Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*... Six Months Later..

[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]

Person 2: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof -- AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!

Person 1: Come on - it's only three more miles.

===Earthquake-Tornado===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!

That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]

Person 2: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!

Person 1: Say the magic words...

Person 2: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!

Person 1: Thank you.

===Lake Diver Killer===
[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]

Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered thebody of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer" During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

===Washington===
[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]

In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln Are entombed forever.

===Alaska===
[A snowy Alaskan field.]

Person: Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

===Life in lab===
[Newspaper headline.]

Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab

[caption under picture of scientists.]

"The trick was fuckin'"

===American Revolution===
Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

===MIT===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I see their admission standards have been slipping.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===MIT Course 15c===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===Smith/Wellesley===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===CNU===
[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]

I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

===Dana Farber===
[Cueball, pointing towards head.]

Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, i shaved my head.

Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

===Earthquake-Hurricane===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Person 2 is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]

Person 2: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!

Person 1: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

===Corporate===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox===
[Firefox error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/The Times===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Aurora-US===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
Person 2: It's cold out.
Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

1037: Umwelt

2014-02-27T16:14:17Z

Chriswampler: /* Explanation */ Finished adding pictures

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| before = [[#Explanation|↓ Skip to explanation ↓]]
| image = umwelt.png
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|umwelt|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day (although only one is seen).

===The Void===

[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===

[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===

[[File:umwelt_snake_composite.png]]
The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===

[[File:umwelt_tortoise.png]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority.
It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===

[[File:umwelt_too_quiet.png]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===

[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===

[[File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===

[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===

[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "Harrison Bergeron"[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_Bergeron]]

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===

[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/688:_Self-Description Self Description] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===

[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===

[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===

[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===

[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===

[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===

[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===

[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===

[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===

[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===

[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===

[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

Rockmelt is a social-media-based browser [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rockmelt]

Reference to "There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family, later covered by Stephen Stills [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Longing_for_Old_Virginia:_Their_Complete_Victor_Recordings_%281934%29]

I run to the rock just to hide my face

And the rocks cried out, no hiding place

There's no hiding place down here

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===

[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===

[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===

[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===

[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===

[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===

[[File:umwelt_france.jpg]]

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm]

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===

[[File:umwelt_germany.png]]

This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===

[[File:umwelt_israel.png]]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===

[[File:umwelt_japan.png]]

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===

[[File:umwelt_uk.jpg]]

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===

[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===

[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicoptor Hunting===

[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have shot wolves en masse from helicopters[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_hunting#North_America_2] in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted (sought mainly for their pelts); and this consumes extra resources such as fuel.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===

[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===

[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' (and/or popular homage to it via Star Trek: "There are four lights") [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chain_of_Command_%28Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation%29][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. (Smith is an all-girls college.)

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

(Wellesley is an all-girls college.)

===Giant Box Trap===

[[File:umwelt_box_trap.png]]

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===

[[File:umwelt_chemo.jpg]]

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==

{Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given}

[Two people...] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))

===The Void===
[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

===Aurora===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?

Person 2: Hockey's on.

Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

===Snake===
[Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

Person holding snake head: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

===Black hat===
[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat Guy. The other is an analyst. Black Hat Guy has a number of terminals attached to his head.]

Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

Black Hat Guy: It *knows* what it did.

[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

===Too quiet===
[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]

Person 1: It's quiet.

Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]

Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.

Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

===Pond===
[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

===Galaxies===
[A trio of galaxies.]

Galaxy 1: He's not looking!

Galaxy 3: Let's get him!

[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]

Person 1: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?

Person 2: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

===xkcd Gold/Beehive part 1===

[Person holding bat.]

Person: Sorry, but this comic

[Person starts to wind up.]

requires

[Person prepares to strike with bat.]

XKCD

[Person swings at a beehive.]

GOLD

===Beehive part 2===
[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

===Yo mamma===
[Person yells at another person.]

Person 1;Oh yeah? Well you mama's so *cynical*, her only dog ballast is a *leash*!

(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights)

===Reddit===
Five seconds ago:

[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread]

You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

Now: [An image of this very page]

Five seconds from now:

You: ..hey

30 seconds from now:

[DANCE PARTY!]

===Buns and Hot dogs===

Person: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?

[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

===Twitter===
[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse_ebooks.]

===Wikipedia===
[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on "The Mile High Club"]

===Google Chrome===
[A Chrome plugin error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

===Chrome/Firefox===
[Two people; one is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]

Person 1: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.

Person 2: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.

Person 1: Oh? What's it called?

Person 2: "Firefox".

===Google Chrome-2===
[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]

Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[Firefox error page.]

Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you

[button with text]

click here to report this incident.

===Internet Explorer===
[IE error page]

IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

===Maxthon===
Person: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

===Netscape Navigator===
[Person with tentacle arms.]

Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

===Rockmelt===
[Person running to laptop.]

I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

[Person sitting at laptop.]

But Rockmelt cried out -

[Laptop shouting]

NO HIDING PLACE

[zoom out]

NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

===Google Chrome-3===
[A chrome plugin error page.]

Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there *ever* exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

===Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome===
[Chrome error page.]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Military===
[Person looking at two browser windows.]

I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

===T-Mobile===
[Error page]

Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

===Verizon===
[Error page]

Error; You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

===France===
[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]

Person 1: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?

French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down europe for over a decade.

[beat]

Person 1: Touche.

French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

===Germany===
[A person dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]

June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.

Person on chairlift: Food!

===Israel===
[Person on phone]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

===Carnot Cycle===
[Person on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]

Person 1: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!

Person 2: Neat -- how fast does it go?

Person 1: Depends how cold it is outside.

===Great Britain===
[Illustration of the atlantic ocean.]

American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most *important* US states.

British person: Hey -- At least we have free health care and real ale.

===Earthquake-Blizzard===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What!

Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*... Six Months Later..

[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]

Person 2: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof -- AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!

Person 1: Come on - it's only three more miles.

===Earthquake-Tornado===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!

That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]

Person 2: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!

Person 1: Say the magic words...

Person 2: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!

Person 1: Thank you.

===Lake Diver Killer===
[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]

Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered thebody of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer" During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

===Washington===
[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]

In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln Are entombed forever.

===Alaska===
[A snowy Alaskan field.]

Person: Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

===Life in lab===
[Newspaper headline.]

Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab

[caption under picture of scientists.]

"The trick was fuckin'"

===American Revolution===
Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

===MIT===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I see their admission standards have been slipping.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===MIT Course 15c===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===Smith/Wellesley===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===CNU===
[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]

I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

===Dana Farber===
[Cueball, pointing towards head.]

Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, i shaved my head.

Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

===Earthquake-Hurricane===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Person 2 is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]

Person 2: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!

Person 1: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

===Corporate===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox===
[Firefox error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/The Times===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Aurora-US===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
Person 2: It's cold out.
Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

File:umwelt chemo.jpg

2014-02-27T16:13:11Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt box trap.png

2014-02-27T16:12:32Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt uk.jpg

2014-02-27T16:11:40Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt japan.png

2014-02-27T16:11:08Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt israel.png

2014-02-27T16:10:24Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt germany.png

2014-02-27T16:09:49Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt france.jpg

2014-02-27T16:09:19Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

1037: Umwelt

2014-02-27T16:08:15Z

Chriswampler: /* Explanation */ Lots of pictures added

{{comic
| number = 1037
| date = April 1, 2012
| title = Umwelt
| before = [[#Explanation|↓ Skip to explanation ↓]]
| image = umwelt.png
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.
}}
==Explanation==
{{Incomplete|Many of the strips are not explained}}
An {{w|umwelt|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that ones entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day (although only one is seen).

===The Void===

[[File:umwelt_the_void.jpg]]

If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.

Possible reference to The Ring (imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.

Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."

Browser: Alternative Browser

===Aurora===

[[File:umwelt_aurora.png]]

The joke here is either that Canadians, where the comic was shown, would regard the {{w|Aurora (astronomy)|Aurora Borealis}} as normal and thus, would not've seen the sight as particularly amazing, or that XKCD characters see in black and white and would not notice the colors.
Alternately, one could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the Aurora, the main character lied. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon

===Snake===

[[File:umwelt_snake_composite.png]]
The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.

Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.

This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.

Location: unknown

===Black Hat===

[[File:umwelt_tortoise.png]]

An analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. The joke here is that the turtle has actually been turned over and neither sees helping it as a priority.
It's a reference to the Voight-Kampff test used in the movie Blade Runner (1982) to identify replicants.

Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" - those without location-specific comics.

===Too Quiet===

[[File:umwelt_too_quiet.png]]

A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.

Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a cliché {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.

Location: unknown

===Pond===

[[File:umwelt_pond_mobile.png]][[File:umwelt_pond_wide.png]]

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Location: unknown

===Galaxies===

[[File:umwelt_galaxies.jpg]]

Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.

The title text is a imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them.

This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.

Location: unknown

===xkcd Gold===

[[File:umwelt_xkcd_gold.png]]

This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".

Referrer: 4chan

===Yo Mama===

[[File:umwelt_dog_ballast.png]]

Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "Harrison Bergeron"[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_Bergeron]]

Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."

Referrer: Facebook

===Reddit===

[[File:umwelt_reddit.png]]

Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.

This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/688:_Self-Description Self Description] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.

Referrer: Reddit

===Buns and Hot dogs===

[[File:umwelt_somethingawful.jpg]]

This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"

Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter

===Twitter===

[[File:umwelt_twitter.jpg]]

Referrer: Twitter

===Wikipedia===

[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_wide.jpg]]
[[File:umwelt_wikipedia_mobile.png]]

The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have sexual intercourse while on board an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic

Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.

Referrer: Wikipedia

===Google Chrome===

[[File:umwelt_chrome1.jpg]]

{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.

Browser: Chrome

===Chrome/Firefox===

[[File:umwelt_chrome2.png]]

Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} the fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser

Browser: Chrome

===Google Chrome-2===

[[File:umwelt_chrome3.png]]

This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece

Browser: Chrome

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===

[[File:umwelt_firefox_incognito.png]]

Another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)

===Internet Explorer===

[[File:umwelt_ie.png]]

Yet another reference to crashing web browsers

Browser: Internet Explorer

===Maxthon===

[[File:umwelt_maxthon.png]]

Browser: Maxthon

===Netscape Navigator===

[[File:umwelt_netscape_womanoctopus.png]]

[[File:umwelt_netscape_man.png]]

Browser: Netscape

===Rockmelt===

[[File:umwelt_rockmelt.png]]

Rockmelt is a social-media-based browser [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rockmelt]

Reference to "There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family, later covered by Stephen Stills [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Longing_for_Old_Virginia:_Their_Complete_Victor_Recordings_%281934%29]

I run to the rock just to hide my face

And the rocks cried out, no hiding place

There's no hiding place down here

Browser: Rockmelt

===Plugin Disabled===

[[File:umwelt_plugin_disabled.png]]

Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled

===Corporate Networks===

[[File:umwelt_corporate_general.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_amazon_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_google_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_firefox.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_microsoft_other.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_chrome.png]]
[[File:umwelt_corporate_nytimes_other.png]]

ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times

===Military===

[[File:umwelt_military.png]]

ISP: Military networks

===T-Mobile===

[[File:umwelt_tmobile.png]]

Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.

ISP: T-Mobile

===Verizon and AT&T===

[[File:umwelt_verizon.png]]

[[File:umwelt_att.png]]

Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.

ISP: Verizon and AT&T

===France===

A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean French Military Failures?" (a Google 'easter egg'), referencing a stereotype of the French:

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm]

[http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]

Locations: France & Quebec

===Germany===
This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.

Location: Germany

===Israel===
(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality.

Location: Israel

===Carnot Cycle===

A pun on "cycle"; a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnot_cycle "Carnot Cycle"] is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating.

Location: Japan

===UK===

He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).

Location: UK

===Blizzard===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_blizzard.png]]

For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin

===Tornado===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_tornado.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas

===Hurricane===

[[File:umwelt_disasters_hurricane.png]]

For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.

Locations: D.C, Florida, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virgina

===Lake Diver Killer===

[[File:umwelt_lake_diver.png]]

Locations: Bay Areas

Location: Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain

===Lincoln Memorial===

[[File:umwelt_lincoln_memorial.png]]

Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.

===Helicoptor Hunting===

[[File:umwelt_helicoptor.png]]

In Alaska, governments and individuals have shot wolves en masse from helicopters[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolf_hunting#North_America_2] in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body - including meat and bones - goes wasted (sought mainly for their pelts); and this consumes extra resources such as fuel.

Location: Alaska

===Newspaper===

[[File:umwelt_life_scientists.png]][[File:umwelt_life_rit.png]][[File:umwelt_life_umass.png]]

Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.

Location: Various

Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst

===Robot Paul Revere===

[[File:umwelt_paul_revere.png]]

Combination of the legend of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Revere#.22Midnight_Ride.22 Paul Revere] and computer binary.

Location: Boston

===Counting Cards===

All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). Possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' (and/or popular homage to it via Star Trek: "There are four lights") [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chain_of_Command_%28Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation%29][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]

Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.

Location: Harvard

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_harvard.png]]

Location: MIT

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_mit.png]]

"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.

Location: Smith

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_smith.png]]

It looks like he forgot to draw the hair in the last three panels. (Smith is an all-girls college.)

Location: Wellesley

[[File:umwelt_counting_cards_wellesley.png]]

(Wellesley is an all-girls college.)

===Giant Box Trap===

Randall got his undergrad in Physics at CMU, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.

Location: Christopher Newport University

===Chemo Support===

Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.

Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute

==Transcript==

{Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given}

[Two people...] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this))

===The Void===
[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]

===Aurora===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?

Person 2: Hockey's on.

Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

===Snake===
[Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]

Person holding snake head: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.

===Black hat===
[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat Guy. The other is an analyst. Black Hat Guy has a number of terminals attached to his head.]

Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?

Black Hat Guy: It *knows* what it did.

[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]

===Too quiet===
[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]

Person 1: It's quiet.

Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.

[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]

Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.

Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.

Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.

===Pond===
[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]

===Galaxies===
[A trio of galaxies.]

Galaxy 1: He's not looking!

Galaxy 3: Let's get him!

[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]

Person 1: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?

Person 2: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.

===xkcd Gold/Beehive part 1===

[Person holding bat.]

Person: Sorry, but this comic

[Person starts to wind up.]

requires

[Person prepares to strike with bat.]

XKCD

[Person swings at a beehive.]

GOLD

===Beehive part 2===
[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]

===Yo mamma===
[Person yells at another person.]

Person 1;Oh yeah? Well you mama's so *cynical*, her only dog ballast is a *leash*!

(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights)

===Reddit===
Five seconds ago:

[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread]

You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.

Now: [An image of this very page]

Five seconds from now:

You: ..hey

30 seconds from now:

[DANCE PARTY!]

===Buns and Hot dogs===

Person: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?

[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]

===Twitter===
[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse_ebooks.]

===Wikipedia===
[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on "The Mile High Club"]

===Google Chrome===
[A Chrome plugin error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.

===Chrome/Firefox===
[Two people; one is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]

Person 1: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.

Person 2: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.

Person 1: Oh? What's it called?

Person 2: "Firefox".

===Google Chrome-2===
[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]

Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.

===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===
[Firefox error page.]

Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you

[button with text]

click here to report this incident.

===Internet Explorer===
[IE error page]

IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.

===Maxthon===
Person: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!

===Netscape Navigator===
[Person with tentacle arms.]

Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.

===Rockmelt===
[Person running to laptop.]

I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face

[Person sitting at laptop.]

But Rockmelt cried out -

[Laptop shouting]

NO HIDING PLACE

[zoom out]

NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE

===Google Chrome-3===
[A chrome plugin error page.]

Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there *ever* exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.

===Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome===
[Chrome error page.]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Military===
[Person looking at two browser windows.]

I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.

===T-Mobile===
[Error page]

Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection

===Verizon===
[Error page]

Error; You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.

===France===
[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]

Person 1: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?

French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?

French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down europe for over a decade.

[beat]

Person 1: Touche.

French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".

===Germany===
[A person dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]

June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.

Person on chairlift: Food!

===Israel===
[Person on phone]

(Translation from Hebrew)

Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ... Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.

===Carnot Cycle===
[Person on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]

Person 1: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!

Person 2: Neat -- how fast does it go?

Person 1: Depends how cold it is outside.

===Great Britain===
[Illustration of the atlantic ocean.]

American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most *important* US states.

British person: Hey -- At least we have free health care and real ale.

===Earthquake-Blizzard===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What!

Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*... Six Months Later..

[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]

Person 2: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof -- AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!

Person 1: Come on - it's only three more miles.

===Earthquake-Tornado===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!

That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]

Person 2: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!

Person 1: Say the magic words...

Person 2: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!

Person 1: Thank you.

===Lake Diver Killer===
[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]

Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered thebody of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer" During the search, three more divers were reported missing.

===Washington===
[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]

In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln Are entombed forever.

===Alaska===
[A snowy Alaskan field.]

Person: Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.

===Life in lab===
[Newspaper headline.]

Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab

[caption under picture of scientists.]

"The trick was fuckin'"

===American Revolution===
Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.

===MIT===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I see their admission standards have been slipping.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===MIT Course 15c===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===Smith/Wellesley===
[Two people in front of a group of students.]

Person 1: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.

Person 2: We'll be rich!

[Person 2 deals some cards while the students watch.]

[The gears turn..]

Student: Five. There are five cards.

Person 1: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.

Person 2: Yeah - there are actually four.

===CNU===
[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]

I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!

===Dana Farber===
[Cueball, pointing towards head.]

Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, i shaved my head.

Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.

===Earthquake-Hurricane===
[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]

Person 1: Stop jiggling your leg.

Person 2: I'm not ji-.. oh!

Person 1: What! Person 2: You'll get it..

[EVERYTHING RUMBLES]

Person 1: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!

Person 2: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.

Person 1: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!

Person 2: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.

Person 1: Oh *really*...

Six Months Later..

[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Person 2 is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]

Person 2: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!

Person 1: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.

===Corporate===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox===
[Firefox error page]

Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Microsoft/The Times===
[Error page]

Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should *never* speak for the company without authorization.

===Aurora-US===
[Person heading out past another person comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]

Person 1: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?
Person 2: It's cold out.
Person 1: Ok. Later.

[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]

Person 2: See anything?

Person 1: No, just clouds.

Person 2: Not surprised.

==Trivia==
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April fool's comics]]
[[Category:Philosophy]]
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]

File:umwelt too quiet.png

2014-02-27T16:05:13Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file derived}}

File:umwelt snake composite.png

2014-02-27T16:04:16Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file derived}}

File:umwelt paul revere.png

2014-02-27T16:02:33Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt life scientists.png

2014-02-27T16:01:37Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt life umass.png

2014-02-27T16:00:59Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt life rit.png

2014-02-27T16:00:04Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt helicoptor.png

2014-02-27T15:58:13Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt lincoln memorial.png

2014-02-27T15:57:48Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt lake diver.png

2014-02-27T15:56:34Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt disasters tornado.png

2014-02-27T15:52:43Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt disasters hurricane.png

2014-02-27T15:50:35Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt disasters blizzard.png

2014-02-27T15:50:01Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file derived}}

File:umwelt aurora.png

2014-02-27T15:47:21Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file derived}}

File:umwelt att.png

2014-02-27T15:45:23Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt verizon.png

2014-02-27T15:45:07Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt tmobile.png

2014-02-27T15:42:34Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt military.png

2014-02-27T15:41:41Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt corporate nytimes other.png

2014-02-27T15:37:52Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt corporate nytimes chrome.png

2014-02-27T15:37:40Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt corporate microsoft other.png

2014-02-27T15:37:26Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt corporate microsoft firefox.png

2014-02-27T15:37:06Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}

File:umwelt corporate microsoft chrome.png

2014-02-27T15:36:44Z

Chriswampler:

== Licensing ==
{{XKCD file}}