explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1491: Stories of the Past and Future

2025-08-14T15:23:26Z

Igordebraga: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1491
| date = February 25, 2015
| title = Stories of the Past and Future
| image = stories_of_the_past_and_future.png
| titletext = Little-known fact: The 'Dawn of Man' opening sequence in 2001 cuts away seconds before the Flintstones theme becomes recognizable.
}}
{{TOC}}
*A larger version of this image can be found [https://xkcd.com/1491/large/ here].

== Explanation ==
It's long been common for narrative works to be set in the past, and this tendency goes back to ancient mythology. The opposite approach, setting a work in a speculative future, has been less common prior to modern times. The oldest example Randall presents is from 1733, but it didn't really become a trend until well into the 19th century, and didn't become really common until the 20th century.

For works set in the future, particularly in the near future, there's a real possibility that audiences will still read or watch it past the date in which is was set, allowing them to compare the real world of this era to the one the author projected. This doesn't make the work less valuable, necessarily, but it does make the limits of such speculation painfully obvious, and tends to make the [https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Zeerust future presented there look dated and quaint]. Randall labels these futuristic works as "obsolete".

For works set in the past, there's an opposite and somewhat more subtle effect. Once the work itself is old enough, audiences tend to forget that they were intended as historical fiction in the first place. If an old work is set in the past, it's often assumed that they were set in their own time, not in the still more distant past. That impacts how we experience the work, because we tend to assume that it's a faithful representation of its own time, not a later interpretation that was intended to be old (and possibly nostalgic) even in its own time.

On top of this, in a similar situation to the failed attempt at {{w|futurology}}, for future-facing works of fiction, even a conscientiously faithful 'historic' film can age badly. Later understanding of previously hazy historical situations can be developed between the time of the fictional work being authored and your experience of it.

To demonstrate those impacts, this chart sorts various works by the year they were created, graphed against how far in the past or future they were originally set. Lines on the chart are added to separate when each work ceases to work as either a prediction or as a [https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PeriodPiece period piece]. For future works, the cut-off is obvious: if it was set in a year prior to the current year, we know that the predictions are obsolete (and can easily determine how accurate or inaccurate that future is). Hence, at the time the chart was written (in 2015), works like ''1984'' and ''2001: A Space Odyssey'' are obsolete, while works like ''Star Trek'', which take place in a more distant future, are still theoretically possible. (''Back to the Future Part II'' is deliberately right on the line, as it was set in 2015).

For the past works, Randall sets the cut-off as when the work itself is older than the events in question were when it was first written/made. Hence, modern audiences are unlikely to realize that the Epic of Gilgamesh was intended to sound ancient, even when it was new, or that novels like ''Les Miserables'' were intended as historical fiction, or even that films like ''Chinatown'' or shows like ''Happy Days'' were intended as period pieces when they were made. To modern audiences, we just see an old work set in an old time, and tend to assume that the two periods were the same.

The setup of the chart points to the reality that, in process of time, more and more works will cross those lines. Future audiences will likely assume that films like ''Apollo 13'' and ''Schindler's List'' were made around the time of the events in question. And modern science fiction works, if they're still remembered in the future, will become just as obsolete as past works. And Randall even indicates "this chart" on the chart, apparently acknowledging that it will become dated as time goes by.

The title text jokes that ''2001'' cuts from prehistoria to the future before ''The Flintstones'' theme can become recognizable. This references the fact that, despite being primarily set in what was then the future, the film opens in the ancient past, thus appearing in both parts of the graph, with one part being very close to ''The Flintstones''. This plays on the fact that one of these was a very serious work and the other a playful animated show that was intended as family comedy. Also, the prehistoric part ends with [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZzVNLCeYKI an hominid screaming], in a way that could transition into [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uq7noaMwLfg the horns of ''The Flintstones'' opening].

===How to read the graph===
* X-axis: Date of publication.
* Y-axis, "Years in the future": Number of years the story's events take place, after the story's publication.
* Y-axis, "Years in the past": Number of years the story's events take place, before the story's publication.
: For example, "Water Margin" was published in the 14th century (x ~= 1300) and relates events from the 12th century, about 200 years before its publication (y ~= 200 in the past).
: Another example: The film ''{{w|The Bridge on the River Kwai}}'' was released in 1957 and it was set around 14 years before (~1942-43).
* Grey area in the "Years in the future" part: Stories set in the future (relative to their publication date), for which the date of the events in the story is already in the past (relative to the publication date of the comic). The white and gray areas in this part of the graph are defined as "still possible" and "obsolete", respectively. The gray area (obsolete) will expand over time, assuming more works aren't added in the future: predictions from science fiction or futuristic work that are not confirmed by reality are doomed to be obsolete.
* Grey area in the "Years in the past" part: Stories set in the past (relative to their publication date) but published closer to their setting than to today. The warning "Modern audiences may not recognize which part were supposed to sound old" is a recurrent theme in the author's work, being already formulated in [[771: Period Speech|Period Speech]] comic. The white area seems to be the region where modern readers will be able to distinguish the past setting of a work from the age of the work itself. This gray area will grow over time (again assuming new works set in the past are not added) with more and more works being indistinguishable as works set in the past.

Taking the "years in the past" on the y-axis to be read as negatives like in most graphs one can write
* Dates on the lower line satisfy the equation y = x-2015. Corresponding works were published in the year x = 2015+y and are set in the year x+y = 2015+2y.
* Dates on the upper line satisfy the equation y = 2015-x. Corresponding works were published in the year x = 2015-y and are set in the year x+y = 2015.
Thus it's clear that the definitions of the lines are consistent with each other as they follow similar but inverted functions.
The graph uses variable {{w|logarithmic scale}}s, adjusting the scale in various regions to the temporal density of works being plotted. If the scale were linear, the graph would in fact represent a (bidimensional) {{w|Minkowski diagram}}, which depicts the moving cones of past and future in spacetime as one's present advances in time.

=== Works listed ===
Differences listed in bright red are "former period pieces." Differences listed in dark red are other works set in the past. Differences listed in bright green are "obsolete" works set in the future. Differences listed in dark green are other works set in the future.

Asterisks (*) after a year of publication denote that it applies to the first installment in a series that spanned more than one year.

You can sort by a specific column in this table by clicking on its header.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;"|'''Publication'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;"|'''Description'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;" data-sort-type="number"|'''Year written'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;" data-sort-type="number"|'''Year difference'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;" data-sort-type="number"|'''Year set in'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;"|'''Notes'''
|-
| ''{{w|Epic of Gilgamesh}}''|| ancient Mesopotamian epic poem || data-sort-value="-2100"|~2100 BCE||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="500" | ~500|| data-sort-value="-2600"|~2600 BCE|| {{w|Enmebaragesi}}, a historically attested ''Epic of Gilgamesh'' character, is thought to have lived around 2600 BCE
|-
| ''{{w|Iliad|The Iliad}}''||epic written by Greek poet Homer || data-sort-value="-750"|700s BCE ||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="500" | ~500 || data-sort-value="-1260"| 1260–1240 BCE ||
|-
| ''{{w|Book of Genesis}}''||first book of the Bible, describing the creation of the world || data-sort-value="-500"|500s–400s BCE ||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="3200" | ~3200 || data-sort-value="-3761"| 3761 BCE || The ''{{w|Anno Mundi}}'' epoch, the product of scriptural calculations by {{w|Maimonides}}, places the Genesis date of the creation of the world at October 7, 3761 BCE in the {{w|proleptic Julian calendar}}
|-
| ''{{w|History of the Peloponnesian War}}''||history written by Thucydides|| data-sort-value="-400"|~400 BCE||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="10" | ~10|| data-sort-value="-431"|431–411 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|Gospels}}''|| collection of literary works detailing the life of Jesus of Nazareth || data-sort-value="65"|~65–110 CE ||style="color:#FF0000;" | 25–75 || data-sort-value="-7"|7–2 BCE – 30–33 CE || Setting dates are those of Jesus' estimated lifetime. Writing dates are as follows: Mark 65–73 CE; Matthew 70–100 CE; Luke 80–100 CE; John 90–110 CE. Randall's difference calculation seems to be based on the date of Jesus' death, as the majority of the Gospels' events takes place during the three years prior to Jesus's death.
|-
| ''{{w|Ashokavadana}}''||narrative of the life of Ashoka the Great||100s CE||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="400" | ~400|| data-sort-value="-304"|304–232 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|The Pillow Book}}''||book written by Sei Shōnagon||1002||style="color:#FF0000;" | 6||996||
|-
| ''{{w|Water Margin}}''||novel by Shi Nai'an|| data-sort-value="1375"|late 1300s||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="150" | ~150|| data-sort-value="1100"|early 1100s
|-
| ''{{w|Richard III (play)|Richard III}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1597||style="color:#FF0000;" | 112–119||1478–1485||
|-
| ''{{w|Henry IV (play)|Henry IV}}''||plays by William Shakespeare||1598*||style="color:#FF0000;" | 185–196||1402–1413||
|-
| ''{{w|King Lear}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1608||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2400|| data-sort-value="-700"|700s BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|King John (play)|King John}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1623||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="400" | ~400|| data-sort-value="1200"|~1200–1216||
|-
| ''{{w|Henry VIII (play)|Henry VIII}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1623||style="color:#FF0000;" | 90–102||1521–1533||
|-
| ''{{w|Julius Caesar (play)|Julius Caesar}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1623||style="color:#8B0000;" | 1667–1670|| data-sort-value="-45"|45–42 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|Memoirs of the Twentieth Century}}''|| book written by Samuel Madden||1733||style="color:#32cd32;" | 264||1997||
|-
| ''{{w|Rip Van Winkle|Rip Van Winkel}}'' [sic]||short story by Washington Irving||1819||style="color:#FF0000;" | 32–52||1767–1787||It's not clear why Randall has chosen 1787 as the year that Rip Van Winkle awakes.
|-
| ''{{w|The Last of the Mohicans}}''||novel by James Cooper||1826||style="color:#FF0000;" | 69||1757||
|-
| ''{{w|Moby-Dick}}''||novel by Herman Melville||1851||style="color:#FF0000;" | 5+|| data-sort-value="1845"|before 1846 || Inspired by events occurring in 1820, the late 1830s, and the early 1840s
|-
| ''{{w|A Tale of Two Cities}}''|| book by Charles Dickens ||1859||style="color:#FF0000;" | 84||1775
|-
| ''{{w|Les Misérables|Les Miserábles}}'' [sic]||novel by Victor Hugo||1862||style="color:#FF0000;" | 47||1815–1832||
|-
| ''{{w|Treasure Island}}''||novel by Robert Louis Stevenson||1883||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="120" | ~120|| data-sort-value="1760"|~1760||
|-
| ''{{w|Looking Backward}}''|| novel written by Edward Bellamy||1888||style="color:#32cd32;" | 112||2000||
|-
| ''{{w|A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court}}''||novel by Mark Twain||1889||style="color:#8B0000;" | 1361||528||
|-
| ''{{w|Golf in the Year 2000}}''|| novel written by J. McCullough||1892||style="color:#32cd32;" | 108||2000||
|-
| ''{{w|The Time Machine}}''|| novel written by H.G. Wells||1895||style="color:#006400;" | 800,000– 1 billion||802,701– 1 billion|| Note that Randall has included only part of the book; which includes scenes all the way from the time of writing to the death of the last life on Earth. The novel itself identifies the latest part as being "more than thirty million years" in the future, based on the theories of the Sun's lifespan at the time.
|-
| ''{{w|Enoch Soames}}''|| short story by Max Beerbohm||1916||style="color:#32cd32;" | 81||1997||Soames was transported from 1897 to 1997 and back.
|-
| ''{{w|Gone With The Wind}}''|| novel by Margaret Mitchel ||1936||style="color:#FF0000;" | 75||1861
|-
| ''{{w|Lest Darkness Fall}}''||alternate history SF novel by L. Sprague de Camp||1939||style="color:#8B0000;" | 1404||535||
|-
| ''{{w|Casablanca (film)|Casablanca}}''||film directed by Michael Curtiz||1942||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="0.9" | <1||1941||The film was released 26 November 1942 and is set in early December 1941.
|-
| ''{{w|Oklahoma!}}''||Broadway musical||1943||style="color:#FF0000;" | 37||1906||
|-
| ''{{w|Nineteen Eighty-Four|1984}}''||novel written by George Orwell||1949||style="color:#32cd32;" | 35||1984||
|-
| ''{{w|The Bridge on the River Kwai}}''||film by David Lean||1952||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="10" | ~10||1942–1943||
|-
| ''{{w|Gunsmoke}}''||American radio and television series||1952*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="75" | ~75||1870s||1952 is when the radio series started. The TV series didn't start until 1955.
|-
| ''{{w|The Ten Commandments (1956 film)|The Ten Commandments}}''||film by Cecil B. DeMille||1956||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="3000" | ~3000|| data-sort-value="-1446"|{{w|The Exodus#Date|~1446 BCE}}||The full timespan is supposedly 80 years (40 before Moses is exiled, then 40 in exile).
|-
| ''{{w|The Music Man}}''||Broadway musical||1957||style="color:#FF0000;" | 45||1912||
|-
| ''{{w|Wythnos yng Nghymru Fydd|A Week in the Wales of the Future}}''||novel written by Islwyn Ffowc Elis||1957||style="color:#006400;" | 76||2033||
|-
|''{{w|Asterix}}''||French comic by Goscinny and Uderzo||1959*||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2009|| data-sort-value="-50"|50 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|The Flintstones}}''||TV series produced by Hanna-Barbera||1960*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="2,500,000" | ~2.5 million|| data-sort-value="-2,500,000"|{{w|Stone Age|Stone Age}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Catch-22}}'' (Book)||novel by Joseph Heller||1961||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="17" | ~17||1942–44||
|-
| ''{{w|The Jetsons}}''||TV series produced by Hanna-Barbera||1962*||style="color:#006400;" | 100||data-sort-value="2062"|~2062||
|-
| ''{{w|Lawrence of Arabia}}''||film by David Lean||1962||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="44" | ~44||1916–1918||
|-
| ''{{w|The Great Escape (film)|The Great Escape}}''||film by John Sturges||1963||style="color:#FF0000;" | 20||1943–1944||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Trek: The Original Series|Star Trek}}'' (TOS)||TV series created by Gene Roddenberry||1966*||style="color:#006400;" | 298||2264||
|-
| ''{{w|Bonnie and Clyde (film)|Bonnie and Clyde}}''||film by Arthur Penn||1967||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="33" | ~33||1932–1934||
|-
| ''{{w|2001: A Space Odyssey (film)|2001: A Space Odyssey}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1968||style="color:#32cd32;" | 33||2001||
|-
| ''{{w|2001: A Space Odyssey|2001: A Space Odyssey}}'' (prologue)||prologue to novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1968||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="3,000,000" | 3 million|| data-sort-value="-3,000,000"|3 million BCE||4 million years BCE in the movie
|-
| ''{{w|Catch-22 (film)|Catch-22}}'' (Movie)||film by Mike Nichols||1970||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="26" | ~26||1942–1944||
|-
| ''{{w|MASH (film)|M*A*S*H}}''||film by Robert Altman||1970||style="color:#FF0000;" | 19||1951||
|-
| ''{{w|Patton (film)|Patton}}''||film by Franklin J. Schaffner||1970||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="25" | ~25||1943–1945||
|-
| ''{{w|American Graffiti}}''||film by George Lucas||1973||style="color:#FF0000;" | 11||1962||
|-
| ''{{w|Blazing Saddles}}''||film by Mel Brooks||1974||style="color:#8B0000;" | 100||1874||
|-
| ''{{w|Chinatown (1974 film)|Chinatown}}''||film by Roman Polanski||1974||style="color:#FF0000;" | 37||1937||
|-
| ''{{w|Happy Days}}''||TV series||1974*||style="color:#FF0000;" | 19–29||1955–1965||
|-
| ''{{w|Space: 1999}}''||TV series created by Gerry and Sylvia Anderson||1975*||style="color:#32cd32;" | 24||1999||
|-
| ''{{w|Annie (musical)|Annie}}'' (play)||Broadway musical||1977||style="color:#8B0000;" | 44||1933||
|-
| ''{{w|Roots (miniseries)|Roots}}''||TV series, adapted from eponymous novel||1977||style="color:#8B0000;" | 90–227||1750–1882||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Wars#Original trilogy|Star Wars}}'' (IV – VI)||original film trilogy ||1977*|| style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="1,000,000,000" | 1 billion || data-sort-value="-1,000,000,000"|"A long time ago"|| It's not clear why Randall has chosen 1 billion years here. Wookieepedia puts the age of the ''Star Wars'' galaxy at [https://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/13,000,000,000_BBY ~13 billion years], and our Universe is only 13.8 billion years old, and the oldest known galaxy took 380 million years to form... So it would seem ''Star Wars'' should be no farther than 400 million years in the past, give or take.
|-
| ''{{w|Grease (film)|Grease}}''||film by Randall Kleiser||1978||style="color:#FF0000;" | 20||1958||
|-
| ''{{w|Apocalypse Now}}''||film by Francis Ford Coppola||1979||style="color:#FF0000;" | 10||1969||
|-
| ''{{w|Chariots of Fire}}''||film by Hugh Hudson||1981||style="color:#8B0000;" | 57||1924||
|-
| ''{{w|2010: Odyssey Two}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1982||style="color:#32cd32;" | 28||2010||
|-
| ''{{w|Annie (1982 film)|Annie}}'' (movie)||film adaptation of the above by John Huston||1982||style="color:#8B0000;" | 49||1933||
|-
| ''{{w|Gandhi (film)|Gandhi}}''||film by Richard Attenborough||1982||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="34" | ~34||1893–1948||
|-
| ''{{w|The Right Stuff (film)|The Right Stuff}}''||film by Philip Kaufman||1983||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="20" | ~20||1947–63||
|-
| ''{{w|The Transformers (TV series)|Transformers}}'' (TV Series)||TV series||1984*||style="color:#32cd32;" data-sort-value="20" | ~20||data-sort-value="2004"|~2004||Only seasons 3 and 4 are set in the year 2005 onwards. Seasons 1 and 2 were set in 1984-85.
|-
| ''{{w|Back to the Future}}''||film by Robert Zemeckis||1985||style="color:#FF0000;" | 30||1955||
|-
| ''{{w|Platoon (film)|Platoon}}''||film by Oliver Stone||1986||style="color:#FF0000;" | 21||1967||
|-
| ''{{w|Dirty Dancing}}''||film by Emile Ardolino||1987||style="color:#FF0000;" | 24||1963||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Trek: The Next Generation|Star Trek: The Next Generation}}''||TV series created by Gene Roddenberry||1987*||style="color:#006400;" | 377||2364||
|-
| ''{{w|2061: Odyssey Three}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1987||style="color:#006400;" | 74||2061||
|-
| ''{{w|The Wonder Years}}''||TV series||1988*||style="color:#FF0000;" | 20–25||1968–1973||
|-
| ''{{w|Back to the Future Part II|Back to the Future Part II}}''||film directed by Robert Zemeckis||1989||style="color:#32cd32;" | 26||2015||Only the first part of the movie is set in 2015; later the setting moves to an alternate 1985 and a revisit of 1955.
|-
| ''{{w|Zero Wing}}''||arcade/computer game||1989||style="color:#006400;" | 112||2101||Previously referenced in [[887: Future Timeline]]
|-
| ''{{w|Back to the Future Part III}}''||film by Robert Zemeckis||1990||style="color:#8B0000;" | 105||1885||
|-
| ''{{w|JFK (film)|JFK}}''||film by Oliver Stone||1991||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="22" | ~22||1963–1969||
|-
| ''{{w|Terminator 2: Judgment Day|Terminator 2}}'' (1995 Portion)||film directed by James Cameron||1991||style="color:#32cd32;" | 4||1995||
|-
| ''{{w|The Sandlot}}''||film by David Mickey Evans||1993||style="color:#8B0000;" | 31||1962||
|-
| ''{{w|Schindler's List}}''||film by Steven Spielberg||1993||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="50" | ~50||1939–1945||
|-
| ''{{w|Apollo 13 (film)|Apollo 13}}''||film by Ron Howard||1995||style="color:#8B0000;" | 25||1970||
|-
| ''{{w|Raptor Red}}''||novel by Robert Bakker||1995||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="65,000,000" | ~65 million|| data-sort-value="-65,000,000"|{{w|Cretaceous Period}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Evita (1996 film)|Evita}}''||film by Alan Parker||1996||style="color:#8B0000;" | 44||1952||
|-
| ''{{w|3001: The Final Odyssey}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1997||style="color:#006400;" | 1004||3001||
|-
| ''{{w|The Big Lebowski}}''||film by the Coen Brothers||1998||style="color:#FF0000;" | 7||1991||
|-
| ''{{w|The Prince of Egypt}}''||animated film by DreamWorks||1998||style="color:#8B0000;" | 3400||data-sort-value="-1446"|{{w|The Exodus#Date|~1446 BCE}}||Despite the same plot of ''The Ten Commandments'', it covers only about 30 years given its Moses is much younger.
|-
| ''{{w|Saving Private Ryan}}''||film by Steven Spielberg||1998||style="color:#8B0000;" | 54||1944||
|-
| ''{{w|That '70s Show}}''||TV series||1998*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="22" | ~22|||1976–1979||
|-
| ''{{w|Freaks and Geeks}}''||TV series||1999*||style="color:#8B0000;" | 19||1980–1981||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Wars#Prequel trilogy|Star Wars}}'' (I – III)||prequel film trilogy||1999*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="1,000,000,000" | 1 billion || data-sort-value="-1,000,000,000"|"A long time ago"|| See note at episodes IV–VI
|-
| ''{{w|Pearl Harbor (film)|Pearl Harbor}}''||film by Michael Bay||2001||style="color:#8B0000;" | 60||1941||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Trek: Enterprise|Enterprise}}''||TV series||2001*||style="color:#006400;" | 150||2151||
|-
| ''{{w|I Love the '80s (U.S. TV series)|I Love the '80s}}''||TV miniseries by VH1||2002||style="color:#8B0000;" | 13–22||1980–1989||
|-
| ''{{w|Ice Age (film series)|Ice Age}}''||animated films by Blue Sky Studios||2002*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="12,000" | ~12,000|| data-sort-value="-12,000"|{{w|Last glacial period|Paleolithic-Mesolithic}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Hotel Rwanda}}''|| film directed by Terry George||2004||style="color:#FF0000;" | 10||1994||
|-
| ''{{w|I Love the '90s (U.S. TV series)|I Love the '90s}}''|| TV miniseries on VH1||2004||style="color:#FF0000;" | 5–14||1990–1999||
|-
| ''{{w|United 93 (film)|United 93}}''|| film directed by Paul Greengrass||2006||style="color:#FF0000;" | 5||2001||
|-
| ''{{w|300 (film)|300}}''||film by Zack Snyder||2007||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2487|| data-sort-value="-480"|{{w|Battle of Thermopylae|480 BCE}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Mad Men}}''||TV series||2007*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="47" | ~47||1960–1970||
|-
|''{{w|10,000 BC (film)|10,000 BC}}''||film by Roland Emmerich||2008||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="12007" | 12,007|| data-sort-value="-10,000"|10,000 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|Year One (film)|Year One}}''||film by Harold Ramis||2009||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2008||data-sort-value="1"|1 CE|| The movie title is not intended to refer to 1 CE, as it is clearly set well before that; it is difficult to determine the film's actual year as it depicts Cain and Abel (c. 4000 BCE) existing simultaneously with Abraham, Sodom and Gomorrah (c. 2000 BCE).
|-
| ''{{w|Downton Abbey}}''||TV series||2010*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="90" | ~90||1912–1923||
|-
| ''{{w|The Wolf of Wall Street}}''||film by Martin Scorsese||2013||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="18" | ~18||1987–1995||
|-
| ''{{w|I Love the 2000s|I Love the 2000s}}''|| TV miniseries on VH1||2014||style="color:#8B0000;" | 14||2000||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Wars sequel trilogy|Star Wars}}'' (VII – IX)||sequel film trilogy||2015*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="1,000,000,000" | 1 billion || data-sort-value="-1,000,000,000"|"A long time ago"|| See note at episodes IV–VI
|-
| ''{{xkcd|1491|This chart}}''||xkcd comic||2015-02-25|| 0.000 || data-sort-value="2015" | 2015-02-25||[[1491: Stories of the Past and Future#top|Self-referential]]
|-
|}

==Errors==

===Dates===
*''{{w|Star Trek: The Next Generation}}'' is vertically positioned at about 500 years in the future, slightly too high for its actual date. This may be to allow room for other nearby labels.
*The {{w|Gospels}} are horizontally positioned at about the year 250 CE, when they should be positioned slightly further to the left, near the 100 CE line. (While there is debate on their date of authorship, the range of "years in the past" indicated on the graph would require authorship between roughly 50 and 100 CE.)
*''{{w|Lest Darkness Fall}}'' takes place about 1400 years in the past, in the year 535. Its placement on the graph indicates it takes place about ''535'' years in the past, in the year ''1400''.

===Spelling===
*Author Washington Irving titled his work ''{{w|Rip Van Winkle}}'', not ''Rip van Winkel'' as [[Randall]] spells it. That said, ''van {{w|nl:Winkel|Winkel}}'' may be a more historically authentic spelling.
*''{{w|Les Misérables}}'' has been misspelled ''Les Miserábles'' (note that French doesn't use the character "á").

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:'''Date of publication'''
:[A logarithmic scale running horizontally, from 3000 BCE to past 2015 CE.]
:'''Years in the future'''
:[A logarithmic scale running vertically, from 1 billion down to 0.]
:'''Stories set in the future''' (science fiction, prediction)
::Stories set in 2015
::[A line divides this region into two. The upper side is labelled "still possible"; the lower side is labelled "obsolete".]
:[From left to right.]
::Memoirs of the Twentieth Century [1700, 265 years in the future]
::Looking Backward [1888, 112 years in the future]
::Golf in the Year 2000 [1892, 108 years in the future]
::The Time Machine [1895, 800 thousand to 30 million years in the future]
::Enoch Soames [1916, ''circa'' 60 years in the future]
::1984 [1949, 35 years in the future]
::A Week in the Wales of the Future [1957, 76 years in the future]
::The Jetsons [1962-63, 100 years in the future]
::Star Trek [1966-69, 300 years in the future]
::2001: A Space Odyssey [1968, 33 years in the future]
::Space: 1999 [1975-77, 24 years in the future]
::2010: Odyssey Two [1982, 28 years in the future]
::Transformers (TV series) [1984-87, 20 years in the future]
::2061: Odyssey Three [1987, 74 years in the future]
::Star Trek: The Next Generation [1987-94, ''circa'' 500 years in the future]
::Back to the Future Part II [1989, 26 years in the future]
::Zero Wing [1989, 112 years in the future]
::Terminator 2 (1995 portion) [1991, 4 years in the future]
::3001: The Final Odyssey [1997, 1004 years in the future]
::Enterprise [2001-2005, 150 years in the future]
::This chart [2015, 0 years in the future]
:'''Years in the past'''
:[A logarithmic scale running vertically, from 0 down past 1 billion to "Big Bang"]
:'''Stories set in the past''' (History, Period Fiction)
::Stories written X years ago and set 2X years ago
::[A line divides this region into two. The upper side is labelled as follows.]
::'''Former period pieces'''
::Stories set in the past, but created long enough ago that they were published closer to their setting than to today.
::Modern audiences may not recognize which parts were ''supposed'' to sound old.
:[From left to right.]
::The Epic of Gilgamesh [''circa'' 2100 BCE, 600 years in the past]
::The Iliad [''circa'' 800 BCE, 450 years in the past]
::History of the Peloponnesian War [''circa'' 390 BCE, 10 years in the past]
::Book of Genesis [''circa'' 500 BCE, 4000 years in the past]
::Ashokavadana [''circa'' 100 BCE, 300 years in the past]
::Gospels (various estimates) [''circa'' 250 CE, 24 to 75 years in the past]
::The Pillow Book [1000 CE, 5 years in the past]
::Water Margin [''circa'' 1300, 195 years in the past]
::Richard III [''circa'' 1590, 115 years in the past]
::Julius Caesar [1599, 1650 years in the past]
::King John [''circa'' 1600, 500 years in the past]
::Henry IV [''circa'' 1600, 190 years in the past]
::King Lear [''circa'' 1606, 3000 years in the past]
::Henry VIII [''circa'' 1612, 105 years in the past]
::The Last of the Mohicans [1826, 69 years in the past]
::Rip Van Winkel [1819, 31-51 years in the past]
::A Tale of Two Cities [1859, 60 years in the past]
::Moby-Dick [1851, anywhere from 4 to 14 years ago]
:::"Some years ago--never mind how long precisely..."
::Les Miserábles [1862, 30 years in the past]
::Treasure Island [1883, 130 years in the past]
::A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court [1889, 2000 years in the past]
::Gone with the Wind [1936, 70 years in the past]
::Lest Darkness Fall [1939, 550 years in the past]
::Casablanca [1942, 1 year in the past]
::Oklahoma! [1943, 37 years in the past]
::The Ten Commandments [1956, 1400 years in the past]
::The Bridge on the River Kwai [1957, 13 years in the past]
::Gunsmoke [1952-61, 80 years in the past]
::The Flintstones [1960-66, 100,000 years in the past]
::Catch-22 (book) [1961, 18 years in the past]
::The Great Escape [1963, 20 years in the past]
::Asterix
::Lawrence of Arabia
::The Music Man
::Bonnie and Clyde
::2001: A Space Odyssey (prologue)
::American Graffiti
::Patton
::Catch-22 (movie) [1970, 27 years in the past]
::Chinatown
::Blazing Saddles
::Apocalypse Now
::Happy Days
::Grease
::M*A*S*H
::Annie (play)
::Roots
::Chariots of Fire
::Star Wars (IV-VI)
::Annie (movie)
::The Right Stuff
::Back to the Future
::Gandhi
::Platoon
::Dirty Dancing
::Back to the Future Part III
::The Wonder Years
::JFK
::The Sandlot
::Schindler's List
::Raptor Red
::Apollo 13
::Star Wars (I-III)
::The Big Lebowski
::Evita
::Saving Private Ryan
::The Prince of Egypt
::Freaks and Geeks
::Hotel Rwanda
::I Love the '80s
::That '70s Show
::Pearl Harbor
::Ice Age
::I Love the '90s
::United 93
::300
::10,000 BC
::Year One
::The Wolf of Wall Street
::I Love the 2000s
::Mad Men
::Downton Abbey
::Star Wars (VII-IX)

==Trivia==
*Later after the initial release of this comic Randall added a link to this page. It is viewable in the HTML-source or here: [https://xkcd.com/1491/info.0.json https://xkcd.com/1491/info.0.json]. The text is: ''"this is a massive fucking graph beyond the limits of normal transcription. you can find a full listing of data points at http:\n\nwww.explainxkcd.com\nwiki\nindex.php\n1491"''.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Timelines]]
[[Category:Time]]
[[Category:Star Trek]]
[[Category:Terminator]]
[[Category:Back to the Future]]
[[Category:Self-reference]]

3120: Geologic Periods

2025-08-14T14:50:54Z

Igordebraga: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 3120
| date = July 25, 2025
| title = Geologic Periods
| image = geologic_periods_2x.png
| imagesize = 611x557px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Geologists claim it's because the earlier Cenozoic used to be called the Tertiary, but that's just a ruse to hide the secret third geologic period, between the Neogene and the Quaternary, that they won't tell us about.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|
*This explanation should focus more on explaining the jokes in the comic rather than the history of life on Earth. There are still no explanations of the "birds" and "raptors" joke, which are the main jokes in the comic.
*The title text explanation could be shortened a bit.}}

This comic depicts a table representing planet Earth's geological time scale. For each period, [[Randall]] highlights his rather idiosyncratic likes and dislikes among their characteristics, instead of accompanying each geological name with facts pertinent to it, such as the duration of the period represented, the state of the Earth (e.g., glaciated), or the flora and fauna most common.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
!Period and date ({{abbr|{{w|Million years ago|MYA}}|Millions of years ago}})
!Randall's comments
!Explanation
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Precambrian}} (4500⁠–⁠539)
|{{Yes|Life develops}}
|The {{w|Precambrian}} (italicized in the comic since it's not a {{w|Period (geology)|geologic period}}) is the first 88% of Earth's history, including the time 4.1 to 3.4 billion years ago when life on Earth began.
|-
|{{No|Snowball Earth episodes}}
|According to the {{w|Snowball Earth}} hypothesis, during some time spans in the past Earth became nearly or entirely frozen, with no liquid water on the surface. This is similar to the {{w|Greenhouse and icehouse Earth#Icehouse Earth|Icehouse Earth}}, including now, when the planet fluctuates between glacial and interglacial periods.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Cambrian}} (539⁠–⁠487)
|{{Yes|Trilobites!}}
|{{w|Trilobite|Trilobites}} are related to present-day insects, crabs, and other arthropods, and appeared during the Cambrian.
|-
|{{No|Evolution could stand to calm down a little}}
|The {{w|Cambrian explosion}} was a sudden radiation of complex life forms when nearly all important animal phyla, or precursors to them, appeared. Randall apparently thinks it all happened a little too fast.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Ordovician}} (487⁠–⁠443)
|{{Yes|Earth might have had rings}}
|Due to the location of impact of one type of meteorite, they may have formed a {{w|Rings of Earth|planetary ring system around Earth}} before colliding with it.
|-
|{{No|Scary volcanic eruption in North America}}
|The volcanic eruptions that deposited {{w|Deicke and Millbrig bentonite layers|layers of ash}} during the Late Ordovician were incredibly large. The volcanoes involved may have been formed during the mountain-building event in {{w|Taconic orogeny|what is now north-eastern North America}}.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Silurian}} (443⁠–⁠420)
|{{Yes|First land animals}}
|Green plants first became established on land during the Ordovician period, after having evolved ways to protect themselves from desiccation and ultraviolet light. During the Silurian, land animals (mostly arthropods resembling {{w|Kampecaris|millipedes}}) followed the plants.
|-
|{{No|Earth's newfound mold problem}}
| Mold soon evolved to attack them and decompose their remains. A "{{w|Indoor mold|mold problem}}" often refers to mold growing in damp places in a building, causing unpleasant odors and various {{w|Indoor_mold#Health_effects|negative health effects}}.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Devonian}} (420⁠–⁠359)
|{{Yes|Big mountains in Boston}}
|A section of the present-day Appalachian Range from the Canadian Maritimes to the Carolinas, including what is now the Boston area of Massachusetts, was created during this period. (At the time, Boston was in the tropics, just south of the equator.)
|-
|{{No|Yeah, sure, what those giant killer fish needed was ''armor''}}
|{{w|Placoderm}} fishes, which were common in the Devonian, had plates of {{w|dermal bone}} in the head and thoracic portions of the body. Not all placoderms were giants, or apex predators. These fishes likely had these bony plates because they helped protect them from predators.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Carboniferous}} (359⁠–⁠299)
|{{Yes|Cool forests}}
|Forests in the Carboniferous lacked the flowering plants and conifers that are common in present-day forests. Instead, forests were dominated by giant versions of today's {{w|Lycopodiaceae|club mosses}}, {{w|Equisetidae|horsetails}}, and {{w|Marattiaceae|ferns}}, as well as by several plant lineages that are now extinct. {{w|File:Meyers b15 s0272b.jpg|Artists' depictions}} of such forests are exotic-looking and considered "cool" by Randall.
|-
|{{No|Bugs too big}}
|Carboniferous '{{w|Carboniferous#Terrestrial invertebrates|bugs}}' included the largest-ever known land invertebrate, a {{w|Arthropleura|2.6 m millipede-like animal}}; the largest-ever known flying insect, resembling a {{w|Meganeura|dragonfly with a wingspan of 75 cm}}; and a {{w|Pulmonoscorpius|70 cm scorpion}}.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Permian}} (299⁠–⁠252)
|{{Yes|Pangea}}
|{{w|Pangaea}} was the most recent {{w|supercontinent}} containing nearly all of Earth's landmass.
|-
|{{No|Google "The Great Dying"}}
|{{w|Permian-Triassic extinction event|The Great Dying}} occurred at the end of the Permian and is the most severe of Earth's {{w|Extinction event#The "Big Five" mass extinctions|'Big Five' mass extinction events}}. In it, 80% of marine species and 70% of terrestrial vertebrate species were wiped out.
|-)
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Triassic}} (252⁠–⁠201)
|{{Yes|Tanystropheus}}
|The ''{{w|Tanystropheus}}'' was an {{w|Archosauromorpha|Archosauromorph}} with a proportionally unusually long neck (as depicted in the comic).
|-
|{{No|Damage to Canada still visible from space at Manicouagan}}
|{{w|Manicouagan Reservoir}} is a ring-shaped lake, the remains of the crater caused by a 5 km (3 mi) asteroid hitting {{w|Quebec}}.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Jurassic}} (201⁠–⁠143)
|{{Yes|Birds}}
|The {{w|Avialae|ancestors of modern birds}} emerged during the Jurassic. Randall has repeatedly found it cool that birds are modern-day dinosaurs.
|-
|{{No|Parasitoid wasps}}
|{{w|Parasitoid wasp}}s reproduce by implanting their eggs into still-living animals, whose bodies are then eaten from the inside out by the wasp's larva. It is such a grisly process that it caused a {{w|Parasitoid wasp#In culture|crisis of faith}} among 19th-century European scholars.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Cretaceous}} (143⁠–⁠66)
|{{Yes|Raptors}};
| rowspan="2" |[[wikipedia:Dromaeosauridae|Raptors]], especially {{w|Velociraptors}}, are a [[:Category:Velociraptors|trope]] within xkcd, especially in its early years. They were popularized by their appearance in the ''[[:Category:Jurassic Park|Jurassic Park]]'' film series. In the films, velociraptors are depicted as small (shorter than adult humans) bipedal scaled dinosaurs which frequently attacked and killed humans. Velociraptors and the irrational fear of being attacked by them in the modern world are a subject of several [[xkcd]] strips. Thus, "raptors" appears in both the "Favorites" and "Complaints" columns of the table.
|-
|{{No|Raptors}}
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Paleogene}} (66⁠–⁠23)
|{{Yes|Pretty horseys!!!}}
|Fossils of members of the {{w|Equidae|horse family}} first appear during this period. Horses, fossil and extant, are prime examples of {{w|charismatic megafauna}} ("Pretty horseys!"). The rapid diversification of horses from a presumed single common ancestor is an oft-cited example of mammalian adaptive radiation.
|-
|{{No|Paleocene-eocene thermal maximum}}
|The {{w|Paleocene–Eocene Thermal Maximum}} was a time when the global average temperature rose by 5-8 °C in a relatively short period of time. It can be viewed as a slower version of [[:Category:Climate change|climate change, which Randall has repeatedly complained about]].
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Neogene}} (23⁠–⁠2.6)
|{{Yes|Forests of ''Dracaena'' dragonblood trees}}
|''{{w|Dracaena draco}}'' and ''{{w|Dracaena cinnabari}}'' trees are a source of {{w|dragon's blood}}, a naturally occurring bright red resin used as a varnish and a dye.
|-
|{{No|Zanclean flood}}
|The {{w|Zanclean flood}} is theorized to be the flood that refilled the Mediterranean Sea.
|-
! rowspan="2" | {{w|Quaternary}} (2.6⁠–⁠present)
|{{Yes|Burrito invented}}
|Randall jokes that, in the last 2.6 million years, his favorite moment was the invention of the {{w|burrito}}, rather than many other, much more significant discoveries. The precise origin of the burrito is not known, but the {{w|Maya civilization}} made food resembling burritos as early as 1500 BC.
|-
|{{No|Whoever picked the name for the third period of the Cenozoic}}
|The third period of the {{w|Cenozoic Era}} is the Quaternary ("Fourth"), named by Jules Desnoyers in 1829. Randall is riffing on the cognitive disconnect between "third" and "fourth", for which the current geological naming conventions offer no explanation.
|}

The title text expands on the complaint about the "third" v "fourth" discrepancy in regard to the Quaternary Period by postulating the existence of an unnamed geologic period within the Cenozoic Era "that geologists won't tell us about". In fact, the use of "Quaternary" (and "Tertiary") in recent/current geological nomenclature is a relic of four centuries of the history of geological studies in Western Europe, complicated by the religiously-inspired acceptance until the beginning of the 19th century, among European scholars, of an Earth that was only 6000 years old. "Primary" rocks were those considered to have been present in mountains before the "Great Deluge" of Noah (the {{w|Genesis flood narrative}}), while "Secondary" rocks represented the rubble from the Flood. Igneous and metamorphic rocks came to be understood as "primary", and eldest (within the context of a 6000-year-old Earth), and sedimentary rocks as "secondary". More recent geological formations came to be known as "tertiary" (relatively newer) and "quaternary" (even more recent). As the idea of Earth being billions of years old gained acceptance and we invented tools for dating rocks, "primary" and "secondary" fell away as descriptors for both rock types and rock ages, replaced by terms that convey information about the rocks more accurately. "Tertiary" was applied to "Cenozoic minus Quaternary", and survived in formal nomenclature into the 21st century. No alternative for "Quaternary" has yet been accepted, so the name persists as fodder for cartoonists who wonder, not without cause, how a "third" element in Earth history could be labeled a "fourth" element.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Don't remove this notice too soon.}}

:[A table with 3 columns, labelled: "Period", "My favorite part" and "My biggest complaint". There are 13 rows below the labels]
:[Row 1: Period:] ''Precambrian'' [My favorite part:] Life develops [My biggest complaint:] Snowball Earth episodes
:[Row 2: Period:] Cambrian [My favorite part:] Trilobites! [My biggest complaint:] Evolution could stand to calm down a little
:[Row 3: Period:] Ordovician [My favorite part:] Earth might have had rings [My biggest complaint:] Scary volcanic eruption in North America
:[Row 4: Period:] Silurian [My favorite part:] First land animals [My biggest complaint:] Earth's newfound mold problem
:[Row 5: Period:] Devonian [My favorite part:] Big mountains in Boston [My biggest complaint:] Yeah, sure, what those giant killer fish needed was '''''armor'''''
:[Row 6: Period:] Carboniferous [My favorite part:] Cool forests [My biggest complaint:] Bugs too big
:[Row 7: Period:] Permian [My favorite part:] Pangea [My biggest complaint:] Google "The Great Dying"
:[Row 8: Period:] Triassic [My favorite part:] Tanystropheus [accompanying the text in this cell is an image of a ''Tanystropheus'' and its characteristic elongated neck, with Cueball standing next to it for scale] [My biggest complaint:] Damage to Canada still visible from space at Manicouagan
:[Row 9: Period:] Jurassic [My favorite part:] Birds [My biggest complaint:] Parasitoid wasps
:[Row 10: Period:] Cretaceous [My favorite part:] Raptors [My biggest complaint:] Raptors
:[Row 11: Period:] Paleogene [My favorite part:] Pretty horseys!!! [My biggest complaint:] Paleocene-eocene thermal maximum
:[Row 12: Period:] Neogene [My favorite part:] Forests of ''Dracaena'' dragonblood trees [My biggest complaint:] Zanclean flood
:[Row 13: Period:] Quaternary [My favorite part:] Burrito invented [My biggest complaint:] Whoever picked the name for the third period of the Cenozoic

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Geology]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

1491: Stories of the Past and Future

2015-02-27T18:27:11Z

Igordebraga: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1491
| date = February 25, 2015
| title = Stories of the Past and Future
| image = stories_of_the_past_and_future.png
| titletext = Little-known fact: The 'Dawn of Man' opening sequence in 2001 cuts away seconds before the Flinstones theme becomes recognizable.
}}

A [http://xkcd.com/1491/large/ larger version] of this image can be found by clicking the image at xkcd.com which can as always be accessed by clicking on the comic number above.

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|A complete explanation of the comic is needed.}}
How to read the graph:
* X-axis: Date of publication.
* Y-axis, "Years in the future": Number of years the story's events take place, after the story's publication.
* Y-axis, "Years in the past": Number of years the story's events take place, before the story's publication.
: For example, "Water Margin" was published in the 14th century (x ~= 1300) and relates events from the 12th century, about 200 years before its publication (y ~= 200 in the past).
: Another example: The film ''{{w|The Bridge on the River Kwai}}'' was released in 1957 and it was set around 14 years before (~1942-43).
* Grey area in the "Years in the future" part: Stories set in the future (relative to their publication date), for which the date of the events in the story is already in the past (relative to now). The white and gray areas in this part of the graph are defined as "still possible" and "obsolete", respectively. The gray area (obsolete) will expand over time, assuming more works aren't added in the future: predictions from science fiction or futuristic work that are not confirmed by reality are doomed to be obsolete.
* Grey area in the "Years in the past" part: Stories set in the past (relative to their publication date) but published closer to their setting than to today. The warning "Modern audiences may not recognize which part were supposed to sound old" is a recurrent theme in the author's work, being already formulated in [[771: Period Speech|Period Speech]] comic. The white area seems to be the region where modern readers will be able to distinguish the past setting of a work from the age of the work itself. This gray area will grow over time (again assuming new works set in the past are not added) with more and more works being indistinguishable as works set in the past.
Randall's intent with this comic might be to point out that modern readers' universe is collapsing, with non-obsolete future predictions and recognizable depictions of the past both shrinking.

Taking the "years in the past" on the y-axis to be read as negatives like in most graphs one can write
* Dates on the lower line satisfy the equation y = x-2015. Corresponding works were published in the year x = 2015+y and are set in the year x+y = 2015+2y.
* Dates on the upper line satisfy the equation y = 2015-x. Corresponding works were published in the year x = 2015-y and are set in the year x+y = 2015.
Thus it's clear that the definitions of the lines are consistent with each other as they follow similar but inverted functions.
The graph uses variable {{w|logarithmic scale}}s, adjusting the scale in various regions to the temporal density of works being plotted. If the scale were linear, the graph would in fact represent a (bidimensional) {{w|Minkowski diagram}}, which depicts the moving cones of past and future in spacetime as one's present advances in time.

The title text jokes that ''2001'' cuts from Prehistoria to the future before ''The Flintstones'' theme can become recognizable. Besides both being works from the 60s based around cavemen, Randall must be comparing the hominid screams preceding the famed "[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtbOmpTnyOc bone becomes satellite]" with the [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PPf3aaZmUw horns of the TV show's opening].

===Works listed===

Differences listed in bright red are "former period pieces." Differences listed in dark red are other works set in the past. Differences listed in bright green are "obsolete" works set in the future. Differences listed in dark green are other works set in the future.

Asterisks (*) after a year of publication denote that it applies to the first installment in a series that spanned more than one year.

You can sort by a specific column in this table by clicking on its header.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;"|'''Publication'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;"|'''Description'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;" data-sort-type="number"|'''Year written'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;" data-sort-type="number"|'''Year difference'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;" data-sort-type="number"|'''Year set in'''
! align="center" style="background:#f0f0f0;"|'''Notes'''
|-
| ''{{w|Epic of Gilgamesh}}''|| anicent Mesopotamian epic poem || data-sort-value="-2100"|~2100 BCE||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="500" | ~500|| data-sort-value="-2600"|~2600 BCE|| {{w|Enmebaragesi}}, a historically attested ''Epic of Gilgamesh'' character, is thought to have lived around 2600 BCE
|-
| ''{{w|Iliad|The Iliad}}''||epic written by Greek poet Homer || data-sort-value="-750"|700s BCE ||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="500" | ~500 || data-sort-value="-1260"| 1260–1240 BCE ||
|-
| ''{{w|Book of Genesis}}''||first book of the Bible, describing the creation of the world || data-sort-value="-500"|500s–400s BCE ||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="4200" | ~4200 || data-sort-value="-3761"| 3761 BCE || The ''{{w|Anno Mundi}}'' epoch, the product of scriptural calculations by {{w|Maimonides}}, places the Genesis date of the creation of the world at October 7, 3761 BCE in the {{w|proleptic Julian calendar}}
|-
| ''{{w|History of the Peloponnesian War}}''||history written by Thucydides|| data-sort-value="-400"|~400 BCE||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="100" | ~10|| data-sort-value="-431"|431–411 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|Gospels}}''|| collection of literary works detailing the life of Jesus of Nazareth || data-sort-value="65"|~65–110 CE ||style="color:#FF0000;" | 25–75 || data-sort-value="-7"|7–2 BCE – 30–33 CE || Setting dates are those of Jesus' estimated lifetime. Writing dates are as follows: Mark 65–73 CE; Matthew 70–100 CE; Luke 80–100 CE; John 90–110 CE. Randall's difference calculation seems to be based on the date of Jesus' death, as the majority of the Gospels' events takes place during the three years prior to Jesus's death.
|-
| ''{{w|Ashokavadana}}''||narrative of the life of Ashoka the Great||100s CE||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="400" | ~400|| data-sort-value="-304"|304–232 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|The Pillow Book}}''||book written by Sei Shōnagon||1002||style="color:#FF0000;" | 6||996||
|-
| ''{{w|Water Margin}}''||novel by Shi Nai'an|| data-sort-value="1375"|late 1300s||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="150" | ~150|| data-sort-value="1100"|early 1100s
|-
| ''{{w|Richard III (play)|Richard III}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1597||style="color:#FF0000;" | 112–119||1478–1485||
|-
| ''{{w|Henry IV (play)|Henry IV}}''||plays by William Shakespeare||1598*||style="color:#FF0000;" | 185–196||1402–1413||
|-
| ''{{w|King Lear}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1608||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2400|| data-sort-value="-700"|700s BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|King John (play)|King John}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1623||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="400" | ~400|| data-sort-value="1200"|~1200–1216||
|-
| ''{{w|Henry VIII (play)|Henry VIII}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1623||style="color:#FF0000;" | 90–102||1521–1533||
|-
| ''{{w|Julius Caesar (play)|Julius Caesar}}''||play by William Shakespeare||1623||style="color:#8B0000;" | 1667–1670|| data-sort-value="-45"|45–42 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|Memoirs of the Twentieth Century}}''|| book written by Samuel Madden||1733||style="color:#00FF00;" | 264||1997||
|-
| ''{{w|Rip Van Winkle|Rip Van Winkel}}'' [sic]||short story by Washington Irving||1819||style="color:#FF0000;" | 32–52||1767–1787||It's not clear why Randall has chosen 1787 as the year that Rip Van Winkle awakes.
|-
| ''{{w|The Last of the Mohicans}}''||novel by James Cooper||1826||style="color:#FF0000;" | 69||1757||
|-
| ''{{w|Moby-Dick}}''||novel by Herman Melville||1851||style="color:#FF0000;" | 5+|| data-sort-value="1845"|before 1846 || Inspired by events occurring in 1820, the late 1830s, and the early 1840s
|-
| ''{{w|A Tale of Two Cities}}''|| book by Charles Dickens ||1859||style="color:#FF0000;" | 84||1775
|-
| ''{{w|Les Misérables|Les Miserábles}}'' [sic]||novel by Victor Hugo||1862||style="color:#FF0000;" | 47||1815–1832||
|-
| ''{{w|Treasure Island}}''||novel by Robert Louis Stevenson||1883||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="120" | ~120|| data-sort-value="1760"|~1760||
|-
| ''{{w|Looking Backward}}''|| novel written by Edward Bellamy||1888||style="color:#00FF00;" | 112||2000||
|-
| ''{{w|A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court}}''||novel by Mark Twain||1889||style="color:#8B0000;" | 1361||528||
|-
| ''{{w|Golf in the Year 2000}}''|| novel written by J. McCullough||1892||style="color:#00FF00;" | 108||2000||
|-
| ''{{w|The Time Machine}}''|| novel written by H.G. Wells||1895||style="color:#006400;" | 800,000– 1 billion||802,701– 1 billion|| Note that Randall has included only part of the book; which includes scenes all the way from the time of writing to the death of the last life on Earth. The part of the story marked is so far in the future that the hundred plus years between publication of the book and the comic have no noticeable effect on the timing of the setting.
|-
| ''{{w|Enoch Soames}}''|| short story by Max Beerbohm||1897||style="color:#00FF00;" | 100||1997||
|-
| ''{{w|Gone With The Wind}}''|| novel by Margaret Mitchel ||1936||style="color:#FF0000;" | 75||1861
|-
| ''{{w|Lest Darkness Fall}}''||alternate history SF novel by L. Sprague de Camp||1939||style="color:#8B0000;" | 1404||535||
|-
| ''{{w|Casablanca (film)|Casablanca}}''||film directed by Michael Curtiz||1942||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="0.9" | <1||1941||
|-
| ''{{w|Oklahoma!}}''||Broadway musical||1943||style="color:#FF0000;" | 37||1906||
|-
| ''{{w|Nineteen Eighty-Four|1984}}''||novel written by George Orwell||1949||style="color:#00FF00;" | 35||1984||
|-
| ''{{w|The Bridge on the River Kwai}}''||film by David Lean||1952||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="10" | ~10||1942–1943||
|-
| ''{{w|Gunsmoke}}''||American radio and television series||1952*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="75" | ~75||1870s||1952 is when the radio series started. The TV series didn't start until 1955.
|-
| ''{{w|The Ten Commandments (1956 film)|The Ten Commandments}}''||film by Cecil B. DeMille||1956||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="3000" | ~3000|| data-sort-value="-1446"|{{w|The Exodus#Date|~1446 BCE}}||The full timespan is supposedly 80 years (40 before Moses is exiled, then 40 in exile).
|-
| ''{{w|The Music Man}}''||Broadway musical||1957||style="color:#FF0000;" | 45||1912||
|-
| ''{{w|Wythnos yng Nghymru Fydd|A Week in the Wales of the Future}}''||novel written by Islwyn Ffowc Elis||1957||style="color:#006400;" | 76||2033||
|-
|''{{w|Asterix}}''||French comic by Goscinny and Uderzo||1959*||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2009|| data-sort-value="-50"|50 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|The Flintstones}}''||TV series produced by Hanna-Barbera||1960*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="2,500,000" | ~2.5 million|| data-sort-value="-2,500,000"|{{w|Stone Age|Stone Age}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Catch-22}}'' (Book)||novel by Joseph Heller||1961||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="17" | ~17||1942–44||
|-
| ''{{w|The Jetsons}}''||TV series produced by Hanna-Barbera||1962*||style="color:#006400;" | 100||data-sort-value="2062"|~2062||
|-
| ''{{w|Lawrence of Arabia}}''||film by David Lean||1962||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="44" | ~44||1916–1918||
|-
| ''{{w|The Great Escape (film)|The Great Escape}}''||film by John Sturges||1963||style="color:#FF0000;" | 20||1943–1944||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Trek: The Original Series|Star Trek}}'' (TOS)||TV series created by Gene Roddenberry||1966*||style="color:#006400;" | 298||2264||
|-
| ''{{w|Bonnie and Clyde (film)|Bonnie and Clyde}}''||film by Arthur Penn||1967||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="33" | ~33||1932–1934||
|-
| ''{{w|2001: A Space Odyssey (film)|2001: A Space Odyssey}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1968||style="color:#00FF00;" | 33||2001||
|-
| ''{{w|2001: A Space Odyssey|2001: A Space Odyssey}}'' (prologue)||prologue to novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1968||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="3,000,000" | 3 million|| data-sort-value="-3,000,000"|3 million BCE||4 million years BCE in the movie
|-
| ''{{w|Catch-22 (film)|Catch-22}}'' (Movie)||film by Mike Nichols||1970||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="26" | ~26||1942–1944||
|-
| ''{{w|MASH (film)|M*A*S*H}}''||film by Robert Altman||1970||style="color:#FF0000;" | 19||1951||
|-
| ''{{w|Patton (film)|Patton}}''||film by Franklin J. Schaffner||1970||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="25" | ~25||1943–1945||
|-
| ''{{w|American Graffiti}}''||film by George Lucas||1973||style="color:#FF0000;" | 11||1962||
|-
| ''{{w|Blazing Saddles}}''||film by Mel Brooks||1974||style="color:#8B0000;" | 100||1874||
|-
| ''{{w|Chinatown (1974 film)|Chinatown}}''||film by Roman Polanski||1974||style="color:#FF0000;" | 37||1937||
|-
| ''{{w|Happy Days}}''||TV series||1974*||style="color:#FF0000;" | 19–29||1955–1965||
|-
| ''{{w|Space: 1999}}''||TV series created by Gerry and Sylvia Anderson||1975*||style="color:#00FF00;" | 24||1999||
|-
| ''{{w|Annie (musical)|Annie}}'' (play)||Broadway musical||1977||style="color:#8B0000;" | 44||1933||
|-
| ''{{w|Roots (miniseries)|Roots}}''||TV series, adapted from eponymous novel||1977||style="color:#8B0000;" | 90–227||1750–1882||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Wars#Original trilogy|Star Wars}}'' (IV – VI)||original film trilogy ||1977*|| style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="1,000,000,000" | 1 billion || data-sort-value="-1,000,000,000"|"A long time ago"|| It's not clear why Randall has chosen 1 billion years here. Wookieepedia puts the age of the ''Star Wars'' galaxy at [http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/13,000,000,000_BBY ~13 billion years], and our Universe is only 13.8 billion years old, and the oldest known galaxy took 380 million years to form... So it would seem ''Star Wars'' should be no farther than 400 million years in the past, give or take.
|-
| ''{{w|Grease (film)|Grease}}''||film by Randall Kleiser||1978||style="color:#FF0000;" | 20||1958||
|-
| ''{{w|Apocalypse Now}}''||film by Francis Ford Coppola||1979||style="color:#FF0000;" | 10||1969||
|-
| ''{{w|Chariots of Fire}}''||film by Hugh Hudson||1981||style="color:#8B0000;" | 57||1924||
|-
| ''{{w|2010: Odyssey Two}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1982||style="color:#00FF00;" | 28||2010||
|-
| ''{{w|Annie (1982 film)|Annie}}'' (movie)||film adaptation of the above by John Huston||1982||style="color:#8B0000;" | 49||1933||
|-
| ''{{w|Gandhi (film)|Gandhi}}''||film by Richard Attenborough||1982||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="34" | ~34||1893–1948||
|-
| ''{{w|The Right Stuff (film)|The Right Stuff}}''||film by Philip Kaufman||1983||style="color:#FF0000;" data-sort-value="20" | ~20||1947–63||
|-
| ''{{w|The Transformers (TV series)|Transformers}}'' (TV Series)||TV series||1984*||style="color:#00FF00;" data-sort-value="20" | ~20||data-sort-value="2004"|~2004||
|-
| ''{{w|Back to the Future}}''||film by Robert Zemeckis||1985||style="color:#FF0000;" | 30||1955||
|-
| ''{{w|Platoon (film)|Platoon}}''||film by Oliver Stone||1986||style="color:#FF0000;" | 21||1967||
|-
| ''{{w|Dirty Dancing}}''||film by Emile Ardolino||1987||style="color:#FF0000;" | 24||1963||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Trek: The Next Generation|Star Trek: The Next Generation}}''||TV series created by Gene Roddenberry||1987*||style="color:#006400;" | 377||2364||
|-
| ''{{w|2061: Odyssey Three}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1987||style="color:#006400;" | 74||2061||
|-
| ''{{w|The Wonder Years}}''||TV series||1988*||style="color:#FF0000;" | 20–25||1968–1973||
|-
| ''{{w|Back to the Future Part II|Back to the Future Part II}}''||film directed by Robert Zemeckis||1989||style="color:#00FF00;" | 26||2015||Only the first part of the movie is set in 2015; later the setting moves to an alternate 1985 and a revisit of 1955.
|-
| ''{{w|Zero Wing}}''||arcade/computer game||1989||style="color:#006400;" | 112||2101||Previously referenced in [[887: Future Timeline]]
|-
| ''{{w|Back to the Future Part III}}''||film by Robert Zemeckis||1990||style="color:#8B0000;" | 105||1885||
|-
| ''{{w|JFK (film)|JFK}}''||film by Oliver Stone||1991||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="22" | ~22||1963–1969||
|-
| ''{{w|Terminator 2: Judgment Day|Terminator 2}}'' (1995 Portion)||film directed by James Cameron||1991||style="color:#00FF00;" | 4||1995||
|-
| ''{{w|The Sandlot}}''||film by David Mickey Evans||1993||style="color:#8B0000;" | 31||1962||
|-
| ''{{w|Schindler's List}}''||film by Steven Spielberg||1993||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="50" | ~50||1939–1945||
|-
| ''{{w|Apollo 13 (film)|Apollo 13}}''||film by Ron Howard||1995||style="color:#8B0000;" | 25||1970||
|-
| ''{{w|Raptor Red}}''||novel by Robert Bakker||1995||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="65,000,000" | ~65 million|| data-sort-value="-65,000,000"|{{w|Cretaceous Period}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Evita (1996 film)|Evita}}''||film by Alan Parker||1996||style="color:#8B0000;" | 44||1952||
|-
| ''{{w|3001: The Final Odyssey}}''||novel written by Arthur C. Clarke||1997||style="color:#006400;" | 1004||3001||
|-
| ''{{w|The Big Lebowski}}''||film by the Coen Brothers||1998||style="color:#FF0000;" | 7||1991||
|-
| ''{{w|The Prince of Egypt}}''||animated film by DreamWorks||1998||style="color:#8B0000;" | 3400||data-sort-value="-1446"|{{w|The Exodus#Date|~1446 BCE}}||Despite the same plot of ''The Ten Commandments'', it covers only about 30 years given its Moses is much younger.
|-
| ''{{w|Saving Private Ryan}}''||film by Steven Spielberg||1998||style="color:#8B0000;" | 54||1944||
|-
| ''{{w|That '70s Show}}''||TV series||1998*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="22" | ~22|||1976–1979||
|-
| ''{{w|Freaks and Geeks}}''||TV series||1999*||style="color:#8B0000;" | 19||1980–1981||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Wars#Prequel trilogy|Star Wars}}'' (I – III)||prequel film trilogy||1999*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="1,000,000,000" | 1 billion || data-sort-value="-1,000,000,000"|"A long time ago"|| See note at episodes IV–VI
|-
| ''{{w|Pearl Harbor (film)|Pearl Harbor}}''||film by Michael Bay||2001||style="color:#8B0000;" | 60||1941||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Trek: Enterprise|Enterprise}}''||TV series||2001*||style="color:#006400;" | 150||2151||
|-
| ''{{w|I Love the '80s (U.S. TV series)|I Love the '80s}}''||TV miniseries by VH1||2002||style="color:#8B0000;" | 13–22||1980–1989||
|-
| ''{{w|Ice Age (film series)|Ice Age}}''||animated films by Blue Sky Studios||2002*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="12,000" | ~12,000|| data-sort-value="-12,000"|{{w|Last glacial period|Paleolithic-Mesolithic}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Hotel Rwanda}}''|| film directed by Terry George||2004||style="color:#FF0000;" | 10||1994||
|-
| ''{{w|I Love the '90s (U.S. TV series)|I Love the '90s}}''|| TV miniseries on VH1||2004||style="color:#FF0000;" | 5–14||1990–1999||
|-
| ''{{w|United 93 (film)|United 93}}''|| film directed by Paul Greengrass||2006||style="color:#FF0000;" | 5||2001||
|-
| ''{{w|300 (film)|300}}''||film by Zack Snyder||2007||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2487|| data-sort-value="-480"|{{w|Battle of Thermopylae|480 BCE}}||
|-
| ''{{w|Mad Men}}''||TV series||2007*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="47" | ~47||1960–1970||
|-
|''{{w|10,000 BC (film)|10,000 BC}}''||film by Roland Emmerich||2008||style="color:#8B0000;" | 11,992|| data-sort-value="-10,000"|10,000 BCE||
|-
| ''{{w|Year One (film)|Year One}}''||film by Harold Ramis||2009||style="color:#8B0000;" | 2008||1 CE||
|-
| ''{{w|Downton Abbey}}''||TV series||2010*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="90" | ~90||1912–1923||
|-
| ''{{w|The Wolf of Wall Street}}''||film by Martin Scorsese||2013||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="18" | ~18||1987–1995||
|-
| ''{{w|I Love the 2000s|I Love the 2000s}}''|| TV miniseries on VH1||2014||style="color:#8B0000;" | 14||2000||
|-
| ''{{w|Star Wars sequel trilogy|Star Wars}}'' (VII – IX)||sequel film trilogy||2015*||style="color:#8B0000;" data-sort-value="1,000,000,000" | 1 billion || data-sort-value="-1,000,000,000"|"A long time ago"|| See note at episodes IV–VI
|-
|}

==Errors==

===Dates===
* ''{{w|Star Trek: The Next Generation}}'' is vertically positioned at about 500 years in the future, slightly too high for its actual date. This may be to allow room for other nearby labels.
* The {{w|Gospels}} are horizontally positioned at about the year 250 CE, when they should be positioned slightly further to the left, near the 100 CE line. (While there is debate on their date of authorship, the range of "years in the past" indicated on the graph would require authorship between roughly 50 and 100 CE.)
* ''{{w|Lest Darkness Fall}}'' takes place about 1400 years in the past, in the year 535. Its placement on the graph indicates it takes place about ''535'' years in the past, in the year ''1400''.

===Spelling===
* Author Washington Irving titled his work ''{{w|Rip Van Winkle}}'', not ''Rip van Winkel'' as [[Randall]] spells it. That said, ''van {{w|nl:Winkel|Winkel}}'' may be a more historically authentic spelling.
* ''{{w|Les Misérables}}'' has been misspelled ''Les Miserábles'' (note that French doesn't use the character "á").

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:'''Date of publication'''
:[A logarithmic scale running horizontally, from 3000 BCE to past 2015 CE]
:'''Years in the future'''
:[A logarithmic scale running vertically, from 1 billion down to 0]
:'''Stories set in the future''' (science fiction, prediction)
::Stories set in 2015
::[A line divides this region into two. The upper side is labelled "still possible"; the lower side is labelled "obsolete".]
:[from left to right...]
::Memoirs of the Twentieth Century [1700, 265 years in the future]
::Looking Backward [1888, 112 years in the future]
::Golf in the Year 2000 [1892, 108 years in the future]
::The Time Machine [1895, 800 thousand to 30 million years in the future]
::Enoch Soames [1916, ''circa'' 60 years in the future]
::1984 [1949, 35 years in the future]
::A Week in the Wales of the Future [1957, 76 years in the future]
::The Jetsons [1962-63, 100 years in the future]
::Star Trek [1966-69, 300 years in the future]
::2001: A Space Odyssey [1968, 33 years in the future]
::Space: 1999 [1975-77, 24 years in the future]
::2010: Odyssey Two [1982, 28 years in the future]
::Transformers (TV series) [1984-87, 20 years in the future]
::2061: Odyssey Three [1987, 74 years in the future]
::Star Trek: The Next Generation [1987-94, ''circa'' 500 years in the future]
::Back to the Future Part II [1989, 26 years in the future]
::Zero Wing [1989, 112 years in the future]
::Terminator 2 (1995 portion) [1991, 4 years in the future]
::3001: The Final Odyssey [1997, 1004 years in the future]
::Enterprise [2001-2005, 150 years in the future]
::This chart [2015, 0 years in the future]
:'''Years in the past'''
:[A logarithmic scale running vertically, from 0 down past 1 billion to "Big Bang"]
:'''Stories set in the past''' (History, Period Fiction)
::Stories written X years ago and set 2X years ago
::[A line divides this region into two. The upper side is labelled as follows.]
::'''Former period pieces'''
::Stories set in the past, but created long enough ago that they were published closer to their setting than to today.
::Modern audiences may not recognize which parts were ''supposed'' to sound old.
:[from left to right...]
::The Epic of Gilgamesh [''circa'' 2100 BCE, 600 years in the past]
::The Iliad [''circa'' 800 BCE, 450 years in the past]
::History of the Peloponnesian War [''circa'' 390 BCE, 10 years in the past]
::Book of Genesis [''circa'' 500 BCE, 4000 years in the past]
::Ashokavadana [''circa'' 100 BCE, 300 years in the past]
::Gospels (various estimates) [''circa'' 250 CE, 24 to 75 years in the past]
::The Pillow Book [1000 CE, 5 years in the past]
::Water Margin [''circa'' 1300, 195 years in the past]
::Richard III [''circa'' 1590, 115 years in the past]
::Julius Caesar [1599, 1650 years in the past]
::King John [''circa'' 1600, 500 years in the past]
::Henry IV [''circa'' 1600, 190 years in the past]
::King Lear [''circa'' 1606, 3000 years in the past]
::Henry VIII [''circa'' 1612, 105 years in the past]
::The Last of the Mohicans [1826, 69 years in the past]
::Rip Van Winkel [1819, 31-51 years in the past]
::A Tale of Two Cities [1859, 60 years in the past]
::Moby-Dick [1851, anywhere from 4 to 14 years ago]
:::"Some years ago--never mind how long precisely..."
::Les Miserábles [1862, 30 years in the past]
::Treasure Island [1883, 130 years in the past]
::A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court [1889, 2000 years in the past]
::Gone with the Wind [1936, 70 years in the past]
::Lest Darkness Fall [1939, 550 years in the past]
::Casablanca [1942, 1 year in the past]
::Oklahoma! [1943, 37 years in the past]
::The Ten Commandments [1956, 1400 years in the past]
::The Bridge on the River Kwai [1957, 13 years in the past]
::Gunsmoke [1952-61, 80 years in the past]
::The Flintstones [1960-66, 100,000 years in the past]
::Catch-22 (book) [1961, 18 years in the past]
::The Great Escape [1963, 20 years in the past]
::Asterix
::Lawrence of Arabia
::The Music Man
::Bonnie and Clyde
::2001: A Space Odyssey (prologue)
::American Graffiti
::Patton
::Catch-22 (movie) [1970, 27 years in the past]
::Chinatown
::Blazing Saddles
::Apocalypse Now
::Happy Days
::Grease
::M*A*S*H
::Annie (play)
::Roots
::Chariots of Fire
::Star Wars (IV-VI)
::Annie (movie)
::The Right Stuff
::Back to the Future
::Gandhi
::Platoon
::Dirty Dancing
::Back to the Future Part III
::The Wonder Years
::JFK
::The Sandlot
::Schindler's List
::Raptor Red
::Apollo 13
::Star Wars (I-III)
::The Big Lebowski
::Evita
::Saving Private Ryan
::The Prince of Egypt
::Freaks and Geeks
::Hotel Rwanda
::I Love the '80s
::That '70s Show
::Pearl Harbor
::Ice Age
::I Love the '90s
::United 93
::300
::10,000 BC
::Year One
::The Wolf of Wall Street
::I Love the 2000s
::Mad Men
::Downton Abbey
::Star Wars (VII-IX)

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Charts]]

1491: Stories of the Past and Future

2015-02-25T19:52:25Z

Igordebraga: /* Works listed */

1491: Stories of the Past and Future

2015-02-25T19:26:48Z

Igordebraga: /* Works listed */

1491: Stories of the Past and Future

2015-02-25T18:55:40Z

Igordebraga:

1491: Stories of the Past and Future

2015-02-25T18:25:06Z

Igordebraga:

1256: Questions

2015-02-24T04:41:00Z

Igordebraga: /* Section Ten */

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}
A larger version of the picture can be found [http://xkcd.com/1256/large/ here]
.
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Many questions unanswered.}}
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon".

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
The tables below have been created so as to split the comic into almost entirely arbitrary blocks, which have then been identified with similarly arbitrary numbers. As a general rule, section numbers work top to bottom, then right to left.
===Illustrated Panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||Arms stop growing because longer arms would not be a very useful way to spend resources. Human DNA has programmed the body to gradually ossify the growing arms and legs, closing the epiphyseal plate, at which point these extremities stop growing.
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||There is no hard evidence of ghosts.
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||Squirrels exist because they fit their biological niche better than any other species.
|-
|Why is sex so important?||Sex is important because it is the primary method of reproduction in many different species.
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe, Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards like Harry won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns; a revolver can't shoot lightning or summon items or teleport its user. Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his Muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is a series of children's books (which usually don't include guns) set in the United Kingdom (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}

===Section One===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? || To the whale, it's like going into outer space!
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?|| Often, these are used by couples to view themselves during coitus.
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company. However, if Game Freak were to develop a Pokémon MMO the MMOs would be strong competition against the console games and therefore reducing the Pokémon demographic significantly.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?|| Highway/freeway {{w|noise barrier|noise barriers}} sometimes have doors in them to allow workers access to both sides of the barrier.
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?|| To add atmosphere and to give players hints when there is a dark cave nearby. See [http://minecraft.gamepedia.com/Ambience Minecraft Wiki].
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||There are certain people who are more respected and well-known than other people, whether it be because of their acting career, major advancements to science, or a sex tape.
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being venomous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||{{w|Creation of a pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}. {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||An old folk remedy for {{w|gonorrhea}} was to clap on the sides of the penis.
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?|| The question relates to the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?" However, they most likely remain "friends" because they are in the same class at school and are therefore "forced" to be around one another.
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||{{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters|Aang}} is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||This likely refers to imessage chat being blue. These messages are blue when sending a message to another apple device.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||Because some people buy them. Mustaches, especially handlebar-style mustaches, were a popular fad at the time of this comic.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||Fuzzy pink mustaches are used to designate cars in the {{w|Lyft}} service.
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||See {{w|Movember}}
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||There are an estimated [http://oh.audubon.org/bsc/SOTB.html 400 bird species] in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_birds_of_Ohio Ohio], but there are [http://www.jstor.org/discover/2419997sid=21104910103541&uid=4&uid=3739776&uid=2&uid=3739256 2.74 nesting pairs per acre].
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?|| {{w|lake_effect|Lake-effect}} rain develops in the same manner as lake-effect snow.
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section Two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?|| In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them. An alternative hypothesis is that they want to hug/touch their loved ones one last time.
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||Blood moves through veins due to irregular pressure from skeletal muscles combined with valves to control direction. In varicose veins these valves malfunction affecting blood flow. In arteries blood flow is produced directly from pressure caused by the heart.
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?|| {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||Programming is the art of writing instructions for a computer to do. Since the computer has a limited set of instructions for you to use it involves a new way of thinking for many. It is also hard because the computer itself is not smart or adaptable to unexpected problems. For instance when a human is told to sort books in a shelf, he or she can do that despite there might be things in the way (he or she will just move it to the side). A computer generally just crash if it doesn't have instructions on how to deal with the unexcepted problem.
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?|| A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, Wikipedia's {{w|Zero-ohm link}} article gives sufficient explanation.
|-
|Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||The brain enjoys repetition especially in music.
|-
|Why do trees die?||Some common reasons include lack of water, lack of nitrogen in the soil and being chopped down.
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||Some stations broadcast a {{w|second audio program}}, an alternative sound track that your TV can be configured to use instead of the primary program. This is intended to be used for broadcasting in an alternate language, or for {{w|Descriptive Video Service}} to make a program accessible to the visually impaired. Many programs that don't actually use SAP will still broadcast an SAP that is identical to the primary program; however, this is not required. If your TV is configured to use SAP and a particular channel isn't broadcasting SAP at that time, there won't be any sound.
|-
|Why aren't Pokémon real?||Pokémon are fantasised creatures that were designed to produce an interesting battle mechanic in a game. Some of the pokémons abilities would be impossible on earth as we know it. For instance, Magcargo is hotter than the surface of the sun<ref name="Bulbapedia Magcargo"> [[http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Magcargo#Trivia|Magcargo]]</ref>.
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?|| Most dreams occur during a stage known as REM (Rapid Eye Movement). During REM, your brain is highly active and its wave pattern is the same as the wave patterns in a person who is awake. It should be noted that dreams can occur during other stages of sleep but most dreams that are vivid occur during the REM stage.
|-
|}

===Section Three===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do testicles move?|| The scrotum shrinks and expands to account for temperature changes.
|-
| Why are there psychics?|| Psychics are humans who supposedly have supernatural abilities to know things. A better question would be to ask why do people suppose there are psychics.
|-
| Why are hats so expensive?|| Hats can be expensive depending on the quality of material, size, location, and demand. A probable answer is that hats are simply difficult to make, causing high prices.
|-
| Why is there caffeine in my shampoo?|| Because the producers want you to believe that caffeine penetrates the hair roots and thereby somehow protects it from negative testosterone impacts and from premature hair loss.
|-
| Why do your boobs hurt?|| The most probable reason is that your bra doesn't fit correctly. It could also be a hormone imbalance or awkwardly shaped breasts.
|}

===Section Four===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why aren't economists rich? || Economists study how laws of self-interest bring about an efficient allocation of resources. In order to become rich, one has to enter a market seeking profit by trading or producing goods or services.
|-
| Why do Americans call it soccer? || {{w|Association Football}} is called Soccer in the USA because {{w|American Football}} is the more popular version there.
|-
| Why are my ears ringing? || {{w|Tinnitus}}, or ringing of the ears, can result from stress, foreign objects in the ear, hearing damage, wax build up, or any other number of causes.
|-
| Why are there so many Avengers? ||The number of Avengers has [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Avengers_members varied greatly] over the years and decades, each time with it's own justification for why they need to work together, but the simplest answer is money. Cross-branding and cross-merchandising is successful to the brand and brings in new readers, plus creates a new franchise to profit from.
|-
|Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
|Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|}

===Section Five===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|-
| Why is Earth tilted? || The Earth is not tilted. Axial tilt is just a result of conservation of momentum when the Earth was formed, because not everything orbits in the same way. It is pure happenstance that Earth's axis is not normal to its plane of orbit.
|-
| Why is space black? || What we call black is the absence of light. Space is mostly empty. Whe we look at a part of space where there is nothing that can reflect the stars' light, it consequently appears black to us.
|-
| Why is outer space so cold? || Space is not cold. There is no matter in space. However, most of space has very little radiation hitting it, so a person won't recieve any energy, but will still radiate some away, resulting in a net loss of energy, colloquially "heat."
|-
| Why are there pyramids on the moon? || There are no pyramids on the moon.
|-
| Why is NASA shutting down? ||NASA isn't shutting down. This question might have something to do with the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_federal_government_shutdown_of_2013 Government Shutdown of 2013] or perhaps due to the then-current shuttle program ending, but that is not the entirety of NASA.
|}

===Section <strike>Spider</strike> Six===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there tiny spiders in my house?
|rowspan="6"|During autumn in particular male spiders reaching maturing will set off to find a mate. By chance they may end up in your house. When encountering spiders in large numbers, it is more likely that they are young from the same female spider. Females lay {{w|Spider#Reproduction_and_life_cycle|up to 3,000}} eggs at a time. These questions also plays off of Munroe's longstanding fear of spiders, especialy the [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/8:_Red_spiders red spiders] mentioned in [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/Category:Red_Spiders several early comics].
|-
| Why do spiders come inside?
|-
| Why are there huge spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there lots of spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there spiders in my room?
|-
| Why are there so many spiders in my room?
|-
| Why do spider bites itch? ||This mostly happens as a immune response to [http://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/stories/why-do-mosquito-bites-itch histamines] under the skin which are injected through saliva.
|-
| Why is dying so scary? ||Part of human nature is the fear of the unknown, and death is the ultimate unknown because it is not knowable until it's experienced, and there is nobody to report what the result was. This leaves it open to speculation, and many major religions are based on preparing ones soul for death. Also, dying would leave loved ones families with the responsibility of taking care of their remains and finances. And finally, most people don't want to die, living for as long as possible, possibly because the unknown is too unbearable to cope with. Still though several people are not afraid of death and dying, and recognize life is short and to cherish each moment while we can. Death is inevitable, so we should not fear it.
|-
| Why is there no GPS in laptops? ||It is not impossible for laptops to have a GPS, and some do. But there are [http://security.stackexchange.com/questions/50907/are-there-gps-tracker-for-laptops design difficulties] that have to be overcome including battery draining, room within the crowded device to place a receiver, WiFi can give a location just as well, and the product casing could interfere with its ability to functional normally and receive the signals necessary to operate as intended. Some Dell computers have these, but the privacy one needs to give up to accept the terms and conditions makes it unfavorable.
|-
| Why do knees click? ||
|-
| Why aren't there E grades? ||E grades [http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/e-f-grading-scale/ actually exist] in some districts, but they are rare. In their long and bizarre history, E was originally used where F is today (E was the lowest grade), but in those systems, students often received E's for an "Excellent" grade, creating much confusion. F was used in place instead and E was eliminated from a standard grading scale.
|-
| Why is isolation bad? ||Isolation is when a person deliberately secludes themselves away from others, often far-removed from society. This can happen in locations as small as a city apartment and as large as the open woods. People evolved as social animals and it is generally held that those who isolate themselves suffer from depression or other forms of psychological imbalance. Of course society can trigger many of these imbalances causing an individual to isolate themselves. Isolation is often seen as therapeutic so people can spend time with themselves constructively, often finding peace within themselves and through mediation. Monks and hermits generally live in solitude as well. Many people view a decision to be isolated as noble, and others as healthy. While general interaction is largely healthy, in the crowded modern world, isolation is neither good or bad; it depends on the person and what that isolation does to them.
|-
| Why do boys like me? ||Attraction comes in many forms: physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, among others. Many people will lie about what they like about you to get something else (money, sex, etc), but most are genuine. It is not possible to assert definitively why one person may like another person, and that is something that needs to be discussed openly and honestly with them and nobody else.
|-
| Why don't boys like me? ||Similar to the answer above about what makes one desirable to another, there are an equal number of factors that make one unappealing. This can include everything from physical appearance to how one treats others. If a person is rude and unfriendly, most people find that not-conducive to healthy relationship and avoid the person who is asking. Not being liked by someone you like however does not mean you're wrong or are a bad person and in most cases has to do with the person you are asking about.
|-
| Why is there always a Java update? ||[https://www.java.com/en/download/faq/whatis_java.xml Java] is a software that runs on most computers and mobile devices that is crucial to its security and stability. The reason why it always updates is because it needs to stay current with the ever-upgrading fleet of browsers, operating systems and software that supports Java. Additionally Java updates itself so each version can run optimally. Software coding and debugging is a never-ending process towards perfectly stable releases.
|-
| Why are there red dots on my thighs? ||
|-
| Why is lying good? ||Lying and other forms of dishonesty is typically seen as bad because it lowers one's credibility and makes them less likely to be trusted in the future. It is almost always advantageous to tell the truth, as lies have a way of escalating as you need to keep expanding on the lie to cover your tracks. There are instances however where lying may be used in more noble circumstances. For example, if a friend asks your opinion on something they have made (such as a poem or painting) that you do not like, it is okay to tell them you like it because protecting their feelings and your relationship is more important than how you feel. Often military personnel are trained to keep national security secrets at all costs and will lie about what they know to save themselves and the country.
|}

===Section Seven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there slaves in the bible? ||Slavery was viewed differently in the early years of human civilization before the contemporary moral and ethical conversations began centuries later. The [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bible_and_slavery bible justified slavery] for a number of reasons, notably to pay off some sort of debt. Slaves were seen as property and their work provided value to the slave owner. Similarly slave owners rationalized their ownership through scripture, pointing out that it was in the Bible and therefore okay with God.
|-
| Why do twins have different fingerprints? || Fingerprints are not only from the DNA, but from the conditions in the womb which differ from child to child.
|-
| Why are Americans afraid of dragons? ||This question was the title of a [http://blogs.sfu.ca/courses/spring2012/engl387/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Why-are-Americans-Afraid-of-Dragons.docx 1974 essay] by Ursula K. LeGeuin in which she makes a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semiotics semiotic] analysis of dragon mythology. She argues that our belief in dragons (and those outside of America as well) stems from childhood, much like other ferocious fictional creatures such as goblins and hobbits, but many hold onto these fears as a way of avoiding reality. In her closing argument, she writes, "They know that its truth challenges, even threatens, all that is false, all that is phony, unnecessary, and trivial in the life they have let themselves be forced into living. They are afraid of dragons, because they are afraid of freedom."
|-
| Why is HTTPS crossed out in red? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a line through HTTPS? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook? || Facebook has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is HTTPS important? || For security reasons, as a site with HTTPS has encrypted traffic.
|}

===Section Eight===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there swarms of gnats? || The reason gnats (and other creatures) tend to swarm together is likely a safety-in-numbers protection, and as a big gathering to find a mate.
|-
| Why is there phlegm? ||{{w|Phlegm#Phlegm|Phlegm}} is a thick, viscous fluid produced by the mucus membranes as a way to clear the airway and aids in the release of bacteria, disease and debris in those passages.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [Steve Duffy, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for geese. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried lasers and bullhorns — hey, get out of here, you crows — and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}.
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type like Mr. Mime are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears, which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as.
|-
| Why do children get cancer? ||{{w|Cancer}} is an aggressive and often fatal disease that has the potential to affect all humans as well as other organisms. There are multiple types of cancer, each with their own epidemiology, but children are not immune to succumbing to the horrific effects of the disease. Children are human beings and are subject to the same illnesses adults have, regardless of age, or their innocence. There is no divine or supernatural explanation for this. Simply put, life is a battle for all humans regardless of how small they are.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}} The Odyssey also says that before sailing, the crew forgot to offer a sacrifice as was ordained.
|-
| Why is there ice in space? || Space is {{w|Outer_space#Environment|Cold}}. The background radiation, which is used to measure the temperature of space's vacuum, is estimated at about 3K (−270 °C; −454 °F). Water freezes at 273.15 K (0ºC; 32ºF). Because the temperature in space is less than the freezing point of water, liquids freeze in space, turning into ice.
|}

===Section <strike>Owl</strike> Nine===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there an owl in my back yard? || Owls can be seen all over the world, and live in a wide variety of habitats. They are mainly noctural, and spend a large portion of the night hunting. The owl in your back yard is likely looking for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl outside my window? || As with the question above, the owl is likely to be hunting for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl on the dollar bill? || On the front of a dollar bill, near the upper right '1' is a tiny section of the design which can be seen to represent an owl. Conspiracy theorists will note that owls were symbolically linked to the Masons, while others will instead see a spider.
|-
| Why do owls attack people? || While owls and human often live in close proximity without problems, as with other species, owls may attack if they feel threatened. When people irritate or otherwise make owls feel unsafe, they retaliate with violence to protect themselves.
|-
| Why are AK47s so expensive? || The market value of an AK47 varies depending on where in the world you live. With strict gun control laws, obtaining an AK47 in the UK is likely to be more expensive due to the risks involved for those supplying the weapon. In ex-soviet countries and the middle east, AK47s are more plentiful, and hence the price is likely to be lower.
|-
| Why are there helicopters circling my house? ||This question is likely a joke because it is so incongruous to the others in this section. The joke is that people would be Googling about owls attacking people and assault rifle prices, which could, ostensibly alert authorities to come to your house to arrest you. If this is not the case, then the helicopter could be there for myriad reasons.
|}

===Section Ten===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there gods? ||All gods and goddesses man made and are part of ancient and fictional mythology and folklore that are used to give spiritual guidance and explanations for phenomenons that were yet unexplained by natural processes. Lightning for example was thought to be produced by Zeus, King of all Greek Gods.
|-
|Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why is Mt Vesuvius there? ||The simple answer is that volcanoes are created by interactions where the Earth's tectonic plates meet. These conditions only exist in a few places on Earth. The question could also be asking, "why is Mt Vesuvius near such a heavily populated area?" Humans have lived near Vesuvius throughout history, due to its pleasant climate, rich soil, and proximity to other major cities. The Italian government [http://www.theguardian.com/world/2003/jun/05/italy.sophiearie offers generous cash incentives] to move people away from the danger zone, but finds few takers.This question could also be a reference to mountaineer [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Mallory George Mallory]'s famous answer as to why he wanted to climb Mount Everest: "Because it's there."
|-
| Why do they say T minus? || Time before the launch of a spacecraft is denoted as T minus because the launch has not happened yet. Any time after the launched is stated without the minus, for example T 3 seconds, so time before the launch can be seen as "minus" time. The T stands for "Test" or "Time".
|-
| Why are there obelisks? || [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obelisk Obeiliks article has more]
|-
| Why are wrestlers always wet? || Professional wrestling is strenuous activity, whether its fake or not. Strenuous activity results in sweat, giving the bodyan appearance of being wet. Greco-roman wrestling and Turkish Oil Wrestling both involve oiling the body, giving a similar appearance.
|-
| Why are oceans becoming more acidic? || Due to the higher amount of carbon dioxide on the atmosphere, which dissolves in the oceans turning into carbonic acid - CO2+H2O=H2CO3 (see {{w|Ocean acidification}})
|-
| Why is Arwen dying? || Because Peter Jackson wanted to give Aragorn manpain
|-
| Why aren't my quail laying eggs? || Have you tried turning them off and on again?
|-
| Why aren't my quail eggs hatching? || Problems in incubation, probably.
|-
|Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state, but Hawaii was still a fundamental part of the United States as it was an incorporated territory.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|}

===Section Eleven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are my boobs itchy? ||It could be anything from dry skin to a rare life-threatening disease. Could also be related to pregnancy, PMS, or puberty. [http://www.just-health.net/Itchy-Breast.html Here's a thorough list] of possible causes and remedies.
|-
| Why are cigarettes legal? ||Despite the obvious detrimental affects nicotine has on health, like caffeine and alcohol, it is easy to regulate. Substances like marijuana and other drugs are mainly illegal because the government and regulatory agencies have no control over their production and distribution and therefore cannot profit from it. Nicotine however, which is the key ingredient in tobacco can be regulated and taxed and is.
|-
| Why are there ducks in my pool? ||Most likely, they're looking for a place to mate. Which means you'll soon have baby ducks in your pool. Most migratory birds are protected by wildlife laws, so you want to prevent them from moving into your pool in the first place. The [http://www.dfwwildlife.org/duck.html DFW Wildlife Coalition] has some tips.
|-
| Why is Jesus white? ||This is an ethnocentric viewpoint that varies throughout cultures. In African cultures he is portrayed as black. In short, whatever culture he is introduced to, those inhabitants will have him fit their own image.
|-
| Why is there liquid in my ear? ||[http://www.healthline.com/symptom/discharge-from-ear It's called otorrhea], and can be caused by infection, trauma, or changes in pressure. A common cause is [http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/swimmers-ear/basics/definition/con-20014723 Swimmer's ear], an infection of the outer ear canal.
|-
| Why do Q tips feel good? ||The inner ear contains [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erectile_tissue erectile tissue] (as does your inner nose which is why sneezing feels good) so you are massing tissue which gets aroused upon stimulation.
|-
| Why do good people die? ||Everybody dies, but loved ones and ones who were known to make memorable or valuable contributions are mourned and revered more than a person who has left much pain to others as their legacy; we remember the good ones and that's why it hurts more.
|-
| Why are ultrasounds important? ||Ultrasound scans provide a great deal of information about a fetus, thus increasing the chances of a healthy birth. They have many other medical uses.
|-
| Why are ultrasound machines expensive? ||As hospital equipment goes, ultrasound machines are actually a bargain. [http://www.costowl.com/healthcare/healthcare-ultrasound-machine-costs.html A new ultrasound machine] costs about $20,000-$75,000, depending on features. Comparable devices are much more expensive: The [http://info.blockimaging.com/bid/84432/CT-Scanner-Price-Guide CT scanner] runs $90,000-$250,000, while the [http://www.ehow.com/about_4731161_much-do-mri-machines-cost.html MRI machine] easily goes over a million.
|-
| Why is stealing wrong? ||Stealing is theft and it is illegal. Taking something that is not yours without permission or payment hurts the livelihood of other individuals as well as damages their trust in others.
|}

===Vertical Questions===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there hell if god forgives? ||There is not a single answer to this question. The answer varies based on the religion and that religion's sect mixed with personal interpretations of that religions scripture and how a person decides to follow it. However the idea of what Hell will be like also varies. There is no one answer to this question, but the easiest explanation is that the individual did not pray hard enough, correctly, was not part of the right religion, and their forgiveness was contingent on something that the person either did not do or know to do (or say or think)
|-
| Why do iguanas die? ||All living things die, but iguanas may suffer from [http://www.anapsid.org/iguana/kidneyfailure.html kidney failure].
|-
| Why is GPS free? || GPS was originally developed by the U.S. military for its own use, not for commercial purposes. Once the satellites were launched and service began, anyone could receive the signals. Because it is a one-way transmission, there is no incremental cost to provide service to more users, and no practical way to prevent use without payment.
|-
| Why are trees tall? ||Tall is a relative term, and Redwoods are famous for their height - among the tallest in the world. The reason for this is, in part [http://www.nps.gov/redw/faqs.htm climate, fog, rain, good soil, few predators, among others].
|-
|Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why is there lava? ||Lava is simply magma (molten rock) which has been ejected from volcanoes. Once it is flowing on land, it is called lava. Magma is heated by the earth's core to create a liquid surface under earth's crust that the land floats on. Sometimes it has to come out through faults and fissures (and volcanoes).
|-
| Why is YKK on a zippers? || YKK Group is the name of a large group of Japanese manufacturing companies, which among other things manufacture a lot of zippers.
|-
| Why is life so boring? ||It is up to an individual to find meaning and interest in life. Monotony, predictability and lack of physical and intellectual stimulation would lead to a feeling of boredom.
|-
| Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts? ||Ghosts are a supernatural phenomenon that have not been empirically proven to exist. Those who believe in ghosts implicitly believe in a soul (of which a ghost is a materialization of), and it is a commonly held belief by religious institutions and ghost-hunters that animals do not have souls and thus dinosaurs would not have any either.
|-
|Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man, and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned. Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why do I feel dizzy? ||Balance is achieved from fluids in the inner-ear, but [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dizziness#Epidemiology dizziness] can have nearly a dozen causes.]
|-
| Why are dogs afraid of fireworks? ||Loud noises can trigger their flight or fight responses when they are [http://www.cesarsway.com/dogbehavior/hyperdog/How-to-Keep-Your-Dog-Safe-and-Calm-During-Fireworks nervous].
|-
| Why are there weeks? || Weeks were originally important for religious reasons, primarily the requirement to observe a sabbath (day of rest) every seventh day. Today it is used to evenly divide months into equal pieces, much like the months divide a year. Similarly, hours and minutes divide a day.
|}

<references/>

==Transcript==
:[This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. These are described at the end. Questions are given in roughly columnar order. None of the questions have question marks.]

:Questions found in Google Autocomplete

:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after HTTP
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arraow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:Why do testicles move
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:Why is there caffeine in my shampoo
:Why do your boobs hurt
:Why aren't economists rich
:Why do Americans call it soccer
:Why are my ears ringing
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:Why is space black
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the moon
:Why is NASA shutting down
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:Why do spiders come inside
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:Why do knees click
:Why aren't there E grades
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good
:Why is GPS free
:Why are trees tall
:Why are there slaves in the Bible
:Why do twins have different fingerprints
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons
:Why is there lava
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:Why is there phlegm
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:Why is psychic weak to bug
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space
:Why are there female Mr Mimes
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:Why is there an owl on the dollar bill
:Why do owls attack people
:Why are AK47s so expensive
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America
:Why is life so boring
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are there ducks in my pool
:Why is Jesus white
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:Why are ultrasounds important
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong
:Why is YKK on all zippers
:Why is HTTPS crossed out in red
:Why is there a line through HTTPS
:Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook
:Why is HTTPS important
:Why are there weeks
:Why do I feel dizzy
:Why are dogs afraid of fireworks
:Why is there no king in England

:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing

:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts

:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels

:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important.

:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Google Search]]