explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1700: New Bug

2022-11-19T17:08:57Z

Misterblu28: happy 1000 comic anniversary

{{comic
| number = 1700
| date = June 29, 2016
| title = New Bug
| image = new_bug.png
| titletext = There's also a unicode-handling bug in the URL request library, and we're storing the passwords unsalted ... so if we salt them with emoji, we can close three issues at once!
}}

==Explanation==
[[Cueball]] asks if an off-panel character can look at his bug report. The person asks if it's a "normal one," and not a "horrifying" one which proves that the entire project is "broken beyond repair and should be burned to the ground." This implies that there have been reports of the "horrifying" variety in the past.

Cueball promises that it is a normal one but it turns out that the server crashes when a user's password is a resolvable URL, which implies that the server is in some way attempting to resolve passwords as if they were URLs. A resolvable URL is one that is syntactically correct and refers to a find-able and accessible resource on the internet (i.e. does not return a {{w|HTTP_404|404 error}} or equivalent when resolved). Therefore a resolvable URL is a {{w|fully qualified domain name}} or a valid IP address that points to a valid server, and it can optionally specify a resource that exists on that server. Normally there is no reason for a system to treat a password as if it were a URL — and testing if a password is a resolvable URL would be a horrible thing to do as it would involve sending the password over the internet in a (at the time the comic was written) most likely completely unencrypted format.

Also, Cueball specifically states that the server is crashing, rather than his application. While this could be an example of misused terminology on the part of Cueball or Randall, given Cueball's history (for example causing the most basic console commands to fail in [[1084: Server Problem]] or other tech issues as seen in [[1586: Keyboard Problems]]) his choice of terms is probably accurate. In the context of web services the server refers to either the computer itself or the program that responds to web requests and executes the user's (i.e. Cueball's) application. Cueball would be in charge of building the application. The importance of this distinction is that a typical system has safe guards in place at many levels to prevent a misbehaving application from crashing anything other than itself. So for his application to crash the server (either the computer itself or the server software hosting his application) would require his application to be operating in a way far outside of the normal, which has been the case for Cueball in previous comics. Alternatively, the project might include its own server software without the safeguards. In either case it is clear that Cueball's issue is far from normal, for which reason the off-panel person gives up and decides that burning the project to the ground is the only solution, telling Cueball ''I'll get the {{w|Charcoal_lighter_fluid|lighter fluid}}''.

In the title text, another two issues with Cueball's program are mentioned, together with a possible solution that would fix all three problems at once. The second problem is a unicode-handling bug in the URL request library, and the third is that the passwords are stored unsalted. The proposed solution is to salt the passwords with {{w|emoji}} (unicode, multi-byte characters), which is claimed to solve all three issues at once. {{w|Salt (cryptography)|Salting}} passwords means that random characters are added to the password before it is cryptographically-secured and stored in the database. Salting increases security in the event that the database is compromised by ensuring that users with the same password will not have the same password hash. This makes some attacks that can be used to crack hash databases, such as {{w|Rainbow table|rainbow tables}}, effectively impossible. Salting passwords with emoji can potentially "fix" these bugs in different ways. First, emoji and other unicode characters are not valid characters in URLs. As a result the salted-passwords will no longer be resolvable URLs. This will presumably circumvent (but not actually fix) the bug that causes the server to crash. In addition, the passwords will now be salted, increasing security. There is no obvious way that this would actually fix a unicode-handling bug in the URL request library. Given Cueball's general approach to problems like this, the best explanation is probably that he hasn't "fixed" the bug but rather that it is no longer a bug because he is relying on its behavior to help fix these other issues, i.e. the classic [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=It%27s%20not%20a%20bug%2C%20it%27s%20a%20feature it's not a bug, it's a feature].

The title text shows that his general approach to problems is not to actually fix bugs but to work around them and even rely on them for other behavior. This approach to software development makes for terrible code, which is likely how Cueball got into this trouble in the first place. Therefore the title text shows that he still has yet to learn from his mistakes, further supporting the suggestion to just burn the whole thing down.

In the title text of the first, using emoji in variable names is mentioned. Emoji has since then become a [[:Category:Emoji|recurrent theme]] on xkcd.

In [[1349: Shouldn't Be Hard]], Cueball is also programming and finding it very difficult, although he thinks it should be easy. An off-panel person suggests burning the computer down with a blowtorch, much like the off-panel person in this one suggests burning the whole project (including the computer) to the ground with lighter fluid. In the next comic, with multiple storylines [[1350: Lorenz]], one [http://xkcd.com/1350/#p:2ed958de-badf-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd story line] results in a computer being [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/a/a6/lorenz_-_laptop_9.png burned with a blow torch].

Exactly [[2700: Account Problems|one thousand comics later]], Cueball is still running into technical problems with abnormal passwords.

Interestingly, the 2021 vulnerability {{w|Log4Shell|Log4Shell}} could be triggered when a specially crafted URL was logged with the Log4j framework. This could lead to a crash (as in the comic) or the computer being taken over by the attacker. However, the contents of a password field should never be logged, so this still would indicate a major problem with the design of Cueball's project.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball sits at his desk in front of his computer leaning back and turning away from it to speak to a person off-panel.]
:Cueball: Can you take a look at the bug I just opened?
:Off-panel voice: Uh oh.

:[Zoom out and pan to show only Cueball sitting on his chair facing away from the computer, which is now off-panel. The person speaking to him is still of panel even though this panel is much broader.]
:Off-panel voice: Is this a '''normal''' bug, or one of those horrifying ones that prove your whole project is broken beyond repair and should be burned to the ground?

:[Zoom in on Cueball's head and upper torso.]
:Cueball: It's a normal one this time, I promise.
:Off-panel voice: OK, what's the bug?

:[Back to a view similar to the first panel where Cueball has turned towards the computer and points at the screen with one hand.]
:Cueball: The server crashes if a user's password is a resolvable URL.
:Off-panel voice: I'll get the lighter fluid.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Programming]]
[[Category:Emoji]]
[[Category:Unicode]]
[[Category:Cueball Computer Problems]]

2520: Symbols

2021-09-24T20:55:09Z

Misterblu28: More merging and cleanup

2520: Symbols

2021-09-24T20:53:24Z

Misterblu28: Changed wording on d/dx part

{{comic
| number = 2520
| date = September 24, 2021
| title = Symbols
| image = symbols.png
| titletext = "röntgen" and "rem" are 20th-century physics terms that mean "no trespassing."
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by an internet argument - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. Bare-bones explanation is in, but needs much more detail.}}

This comic refers to notation commonly used in various fields of math and science, and humorously comments on their implications.

d/dx and ∂/∂x are both used to represent derivatives in calculus and related fields. d/dx is most commonly used in introductory and basic calculus, and is moderately difficult but well within reach for an undergrad math student. On the other hand, ∂/∂x is the symbol for a partial derivative, indicating a problem involving multivariable calculus, which is a level of difficulty above single-variable calculus.

ħ (pronounced 'h-bar') is a symbol used for Planck's constant, a universal constant in quantum physics equal to the energy of a photon divided by its frequency.

Re, Reynolds' number, is used in modelling the flow of fluids. Fluid flow cannot usually be modelled analytically and so a complex numerical model is necessary.

NA is Avogadro's number, which is used in chemistry for calculating the number of molecules in a mass of substance. Its use implies a chemistry problem where relative concentrations and orders of magnitude are important; if a mistake is made the concentration of a potentially dangerous chemical could be far too strong or too weak.

μm and mK (micrometers and millikelvin) are very small units of length and temperature respectively. Any equipment that is operating in these units will be incredibly finely calibrated and thus very expensive. Millikelvins would measure temperatures barely above absolute zero, suggesting sensitive experiments probing quantum mechanical behavior that would likely only exist in an advanced lab.

nm and eV (nanometers and electronvolts) are also small units of length and energy. Nanometres in particular are commonly used to refer to wavelengths of light, and therefore might be seen when working with lasers, which you should definitely not shine in your eye. Electron volts are a measure of energy in particle physics; particle accelerators produce intense radiation which should definitely not be directed toward your eye.

mSv (millisieverts) are a unit of radiation exposure. Randall's comment may be referring to [https://xkcd.com/radiation/ this chart].

mg/kg and μg/kg (milligrams per kilogram and micrograms per kilogram) are units of toxicity; the average lethal dose of a chemical with toxicity 1 mg/kg would be one milligram of chemical for every kilogram the person weighs. Such a chemical would be quite dangerous; since micrograms are much smaller than milligrams, any chemical with toxicity measured in μg/kg would be a lot worse.

Finally, the comic references pi and tau. Pi is defined as the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter, while tau is defined as pi times two. Pi is more commonly used as a circle constant and is helpful when working with areas and volumes, but proponents of tau argue that it is more useful in a pure mathematics context as it makes working with radians easier. The joke here is that whichever constant you attempt to use, it will probably be the wrong one for what you are trying to achieve.

This comic discusses different symbols found in equations, and humorously comments on their implications.
*d/dx: An undergrad is working very hard
d/dx is the symbol for a single-variable {{w|Derivative|derivative}}. This is a mathematical operation that, while difficult, is well within the reach of an undergraduate student, particularly in science. Thus, an equation with this operation would be one that would cause an undergraduate student to work very hard.

*d/dx: An undergrad is working very hard
d/dx is the symbol for a single-variable {{w|Derivative|derivative}} taken with respect to x. This is a mathematical operation that, while difficult, is well within the reach of an undergraduate student, particularly in science. Thus, an equation with this operation would be one that would cause an undergraduate student to work very hard.

*∂/∂x: A grad student is working very hard
: Partial derivative. Partial differential equations are typically encountered in higher-level coursework, hence why a grad student would be working hard vs. an undergrad.
;Re
:Reynolds number, used in modelling the flow of fluids. Fluid flow cannot usually be modelled analytically and so a numerical model is necessary.
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:Temperature component of net radiation loss. See Stefan-Boltzmann's law. This is a joke about how the Sun is a very powerful blackbody radiator.
;NA
:Avagadro's constant. If you are using this and not working in Moles there is a good chance that you will make a mistake of a factor of a power of ten. THis could create dangerous amounts of chemicals
;µm
:Micrometers are small. Any equipment that is accurate to that degree is likely to be expensive
;mK
:millikelvin are small changes in temperature, or represent very low temperatures. Equipment that uses mK is very expensive
;nm
:Describes the wavelength of laser light
;eV
:describes the energy of a particle beam. Not shining it through your eye may be a reference to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatoli_Bugorski .
;mSv
:The amount of radiation absorbed. The pun most likely refers to internet trolls debating the effects of radiation like 5G networks, or fans of the [[2163|Chenobyl series]].
;mg/kg
:The toxicity of a chemical, per kg of body mass. If it is measured in mg/kg it is quite toxic
;µg/kg
:If the chemical is measured in µg/kg it is extremely toxic
;π or τ
:τ = 2π, so it would be easy to make a mistake and use π when τ is correct. Or vice-versa!

The title text refers to two non-SI units of radiation measurement. An area with significant amounts of radiation is probably dangerous, hence the no trespassing part.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

;d/dx
:an undergrad is working very hard
;∂/∂x
:a grad student is working very hard
;ħ
:oh wow, this is apparently a quantum thing
;Re
:someone needs to do a lot of tedious numerical work; hopefully it's not you
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:you are at risk of skin burns
;NA
:you are probably about to make an incredibly dangerous arithmetic error
;µm
:careful, that equipment is expensive
;mK
:careful, that equipment is very expensive
;nm
:don't shine that in your eye
;eV
:definitely don't shine that in your eye
;mSv
:you are about to get into an internet argument
;mg/kg
:go wash your hands
;µg/kg
:go get in the chemical shower
;π or τ
:whatever answer you get will be wrong by a factor of exactly two

{{comic discussion}}

2520: Symbols

2021-09-24T20:51:11Z

Misterblu28: Previous merge attempt, take two

2520: Symbols

2021-09-24T20:50:17Z

Misterblu28: Attempted to manually merge two existing explanations

{{comic
| number = 2520
| date = September 24, 2021
| title = Symbols
| image = symbols.png
| titletext = "röntgen" and "rem" are 20th-century physics terms that mean "no trespassing."
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by an internet argument - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. Bare-bones explanation is in, but needs much more detail.}}

This comic refers to notation commonly used in various fields of math and science, and humorously comments on their implications.

d/dx and ∂/∂x are both used to represent derivatives in calculus and related fields. d/dx is most commonly used in introductory and basic calculus, while ∂/∂x is the symbol for a partial derivative, indicating a problem involving multivariable calculus, which is a level of difficulty above single-variable calculus.

ħ (pronounced 'h-bar') is a symbol used for Planck's constant, a universal constant in quantum physics equal to the energy of a photon divided by its frequency.

Re, Reynolds' number, is used in modelling the flow of fluids. Fluid flow cannot usually be modelled analytically and so a complex numerical model is necessary.

NA is Avogadro's number, which is used in chemistry for calculating the number of molecules in a mass of substance. Its use implies a chemistry problem where relative concentrations and orders of magnitude are important; if a mistake is made the concentration of a potentially dangerous chemical could be far too strong or too weak.

μm and mK (micrometers and millikelvin) are very small units of length and temperature respectively. Any equipment that is operating in these units will be incredibly finely calibrated and thus very expensive. Millikelvins would measure temperatures barely above absolute zero, suggesting sensitive experiments probing quantum mechanical behavior that would likely only exist in an advanced lab.

nm and eV (nanometers and electronvolts) are also small units of length and energy. Nanometres in particular are commonly used to refer to wavelengths of light, and therefore might be seen when working with lasers, which you should definitely not shine in your eye. Electron volts are a measure of energy in particle physics; particle accelerators produce intense radiation which should definitely not be directed toward your eye.

mSv (millisieverts) are a unit of radiation exposure. Randall's comment may be referring to [https://xkcd.com/radiation/ this chart].

mg/kg and μg/kg (milligrams per kilogram and micrograms per kilogram) are units of toxicity; the average lethal dose of a chemical with toxicity 1 mg/kg would be one milligram of chemical for every kilogram the person weighs. Such a chemical would be quite dangerous; since micrograms are much smaller than milligrams, any chemical with toxicity measured in μg/kg would be a lot worse.

Finally, the comic references pi and tau. Pi is defined as the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter, while tau is defined as pi times two. Pi is more commonly used as a circle constant and is helpful when working with areas and volumes, but proponents of tau argue that it is more useful in a pure mathematics context as it makes working with radians easier. The joke here is that whichever constant you attempt to use, it will probably be the wrong one for what you are trying to achieve.

This comic discusses different symbols found in equations, and humorously comments on their implications.
*d/dx: An undergrad is working very hard
d/dx is the symbol for a single-variable {{w|Derivative|derivative}}. This is a mathematical operation that, while difficult, is well within the reach of an undergraduate student, particularly in science. Thus, an equation with this operation would be one that would cause an undergraduate student to work very hard.

*d/dx: An undergrad is working very hard
d/dx is the symbol for a single-variable {{w|Derivative|derivative}} taken with respect to x. This is a mathematical operation that, while difficult, is well within the reach of an undergraduate student, particularly in science. Thus, an equation with this operation would be one that would cause an undergraduate student to work very hard.

*∂/∂x: A grad student is working very hard
: Partial derivative. Partial differential equations are typically encountered in higher-level coursework, hence why a grad student would be working hard vs. an undergrad.
;Re
:Reynolds number, used in modelling the flow of fluids. Fluid flow cannot usually be modelled analytically and so a numerical model is necessary.
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:Temperature component of net radiation loss. See Stefan-Boltzmann's law. This is a joke about how the Sun is a very powerful blackbody radiator.
;NA
:Avagadro's constant. If you are using this and not working in Moles there is a good chance that you will make a mistake of a factor of a power of ten. THis could create dangerous amounts of chemicals
;µm
:Micrometers are small. Any equipment that is accurate to that degree is likely to be expensive
;mK
:millikelvin are small changes in temperature, or represent very low temperatures. Equipment that uses mK is very expensive
;nm
:Describes the wavelength of laser light
;eV
:describes the energy of a particle beam. Not shining it through your eye may be a reference to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatoli_Bugorski .
;mSv
:The amount of radiation absorbed. The pun most likely refers to internet trolls debating the effects of radiation like 5G networks, or fans of the [[2163|Chenobyl series]].
;mg/kg
:The toxicity of a chemical, per kg of body mass. If it is measured in mg/kg it is quite toxic
;µg/kg
:If the chemical is measured in µg/kg it is extremely toxic
;π or τ
:τ = 2π, so it would be easy to make a mistake and use π when τ is correct. Or vice-versa!

The title text refers to two non-SI units of radiation measurement. An area with significant amounts of radiation is probably dangerous, hence the no trespassing part.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

;d/dx
:an undergrad is working very hard
;∂/∂x
:a grad student is working very hard
;ħ
:oh wow, this is apparently a quantum thing
;Re
:someone needs to do a lot of tedious numerical work; hopefully it's not you
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:you are at risk of skin burns
;NA
:you are probably about to make an incredibly dangerous arithmetic error
;µm
:careful, that equipment is expensive
;mK
:careful, that equipment is very expensive
;nm
:don't shine that in your eye
;eV
:definitely don't shine that in your eye
;mSv
:you are about to get into an internet argument
;mg/kg
:go wash your hands
;µg/kg
:go get in the chemical shower
;π or τ
:whatever answer you get will be wrong by a factor of exactly two

{{comic discussion}}

2520: Symbols

2021-09-24T20:37:05Z

Misterblu28: Added short notes for most items in the list. Needs a lot of work.

{{comic
| number = 2520
| date = September 24, 2021
| title = Symbols
| image = symbols.png
| titletext = "röntgen" and "rem" are 20th-century physics terms that mean "no trespassing."
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by an internet argument - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. Bare-bones explanation is in, but needs much more detail.}}

This comic refers to notation commonly used in various fields of math and science.

d/dx and ∂/∂x are both used to represent derivatives in calculus and related fields. d/dx is most commonly used in introductory and basic calculus, while ∂/∂x is used when dealing with partial differential equations, a notoriously complicated topic.

ħ (pronounced 'h-bar') is a symbol used for Planck's constant, a universal constant in quantum physics equal to the energy of a photon divided by its frequency.

NA is Avogadro's number, which is used in chemistry for calculating the number of molecules in a mass of substance. As it is an extremely large number, it may lead to painful arithmetic mistakes.

μm and mK (micrometers and millikelvin) are very small units of length and temperature respectively. Any equipment that is operating in these units will be incredibly finely calibrated and thus very expensive.

nm and eV (nanometers and electronvolts) are also small units of length and energy. Nanometres in particular are commonly used to refer to wavelengths of light, and therefore might be seen when working with lasers, which you should definitely not shine in your eye.

mSv (millisieverts) are a unit of radiation exposure. Randall's comment may be referring to [https://xkcd.com/radiation/ this chart].

mg/kg and μg/kg (milligrams per kilogram and micrograms per kilogram) are units used to count the proportion of a substance that contains a certain chemical; they are equivalent to 'parts per million' and 'parts per billion' respectively. These might be found when working with particularly dangerous chemicals, where even slight exposure could lead to severe health risks.

Finally, the comic references pi and tau. Pi is defined as the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter, while tau is defined as pi times two. Pi is more commonly used as a circle constant and is helpful when working with areas and volumes, but proponents of tau argue that it is more useful in a pure mathematics context as it makes working with radians easier. The joke here is that whichever constant you attempt to use, it will probably be the wrong one for what you are trying to achieve.

This comic discusses different symbols found in equations, and humorously comments on their implications.
*d/dx: An undergrad is working very hard
d/dx is the symbol for a single-variable {{w|Derivative|derivative}}. This is a mathematical operation that, while difficult, is well within the reach of an undergraduate student, particularly in science. Thus, an equation with this operation would be one that would cause an undergraduate student to work very hard.

*d/dx: An undergrad is working very hard
d/dx is the symbol for a single-variable {{w|Derivative|derivative}} taken with respect to x. This is a mathematical operation that, while difficult, is well within the reach of an undergraduate student, particularly in science. Thus, an equation with this operation would be one that would cause an undergraduate student to work very hard.

*∂/∂x: A grad student is working very hard

;Re
:Reynolds number, used in modelling the flow of fluids. Fluid flow cannot usually be modelled analytically and so a numerical model is necessary.
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:
;NA
:Avagadro's constant. If you are using this and not working in Moles there is a good chance that you will make a mistake of a factor of a power of ten. THis could create dangerous amounts of chemicals
;µm
:Micrometers are small. Any equipment that is accurate to that degree is likely to be expensive
;mK
:millikelvin are small changes in temperature, or represent very low temperatures. Equipment that uses mK is very expensive
;nm
:Describes the wavelength of laser light
;eV
:describes the energy of a particle beam
;mSv
:The amount of radiation absorbed.
;mg/kg
:The toxicity of a chemical, per kg of body mass. If it is measured in mg/kg it is quite toxic
;µg/kg
:If the chemical is measured in µg/kg it is extremely toxic
;π or τ
:τ = 2π, so it would be easy to make a mistake and use π when τ is correct.

The title text refers to two non-SI units of radiation measurement. An area with significant amounts of radiation is probably dangerous, hence the no trespassing part.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

;d/dx
:an undergrad is working very hard
;∂/∂x
:a grad student is working very hard
;ħ
:oh wow, this is apparently a quantum thing
;Re
:someone needs to do a lot of tedious numerical work; hopefully it's not you
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:you are at risk of skin burns
;NA
:you are probably about to make an incredibly dangerous arithmetic error
;µm
:careful, that equipment is expensive
;mK
:careful, that equipment is very expensive
;nm
:don't shine that in your eye
;eV
:definitely don't shine that in your eye
;mSv
:you are about to get into an internet argument
;mg/kg
:go wash your hands
;µg/kg
:go get in the chemical shower
;π or τ
:whatever answer you get will be wrong by a factor of exactly two

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

;d/dx
:an undergrad is working very hard
;∂/∂x
:a grad student is working very hard
;ħ
:oh wow, this is apparently a quantum thing
;Re
:someone needs to do a lot of tedious numerical work; hopefully it's not you
;(Ta4 - Tb4)
:you are at risk of skin burns
;NA
:you are probably about to make an incredibly dangerous arithmetic error
;µm
:careful, that equipment is expensive
;mK
:careful, that equipment is very expensive
;nm
:don't shine that in your eye
;eV
:definitely don't shine that in your eye
;mSv
:you are about to get into an internet argument
;mg/kg
:go wash your hands
;µg/kg
:go get in the chemical shower
;π or τ
:whatever answer you get will be wrong by a factor of exactly two

{{comic discussion}}

2309: X

2020-05-21T10:09:14Z

Misterblu28: /* Explanation */ Talked about title text, explained why programmers use meaningful variable names and exactly why this language would be so unpleasant.

{{comic
| number = 2309
| date = May 20, 2020
| title = X
| image = x.png
| titletext = The worst is when you run out of monospaced fonts and have to use variable-width variables.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a COMIC SANS X AND A NEW PROGRAMMER. This page needs an expanded explanation of what esoteric languages are. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

[[Cueball]] has developed a new {{w|programming language}} with novel syntax. These languages are classified as {{w|esoteric language}}s, which are programming languages developed for no practical use (although that doesn't stop people from trying) other than novelty. The classic example of these are {{w|INTERCAL}} and {{w|brainfuck}}.

Normally, there is no law against developing bad programming languages or bad code (although some would argue there should be). The law often has to play catch-up with technology. However, as with the example of Cueball and the EPA, and Cueball with tech support problems, it seems that the Government has made an exemption in this case, possibly because the result is so egregious as to cause real harm.

A {{w|Variable (computer science)|variable}} is a piece of data (such as an integer or a string of text) that can change in value. Variables can usually be named any string of alphanumeric characters. For the sake of readability, variables are usually named something relevant to what the variable represents. For example, a variable counting how many seconds have passed since the program was launched might be called elapsedTime. Some programmers, particularly if they are working under time pressure, will give their variables names (such as 'x') that do not describe what they do, and are thus almost completely meaningless. This is considered bad coding practice, because anyone reading the code who is not familiar with it will not understand what the variable does.

Here, Cueball is developing a language where the only way to differentiate variables is to write the letter "X" in different fonts. Typically, code is written in plain text without a way to specify a font, which would mean that Cueball has implemented a lot more processing in the {{w|compiler}} or {{w|Integrated development environment|IDE}} in a fashion typically seen as unconventional. This 'feature' would be a nightmare to program with, as all of the variables would look very similar unless careful attention is being paid, and there would be little to no way to determine what each one does, since font names are typically not particularly descriptive. Additionally, the fact that some fonts look similar (such as Arial and Helvetica) would require the programmer to have an intricate knowledge of different fonts and how to distinguish them from only one letter.

This is also a jab at mathematicians who are in addition to using variable names which are short and nondescript (e.g. "x"), are also "typeface sensitive" (in addition to case sensitive). In other words, one can typically find a statement involving three different "X" variables, referring to three different objects, and they are distinguished by their font and case.

The title text references the fact that most IDEs use a monospaced font (i.e. one where every character is the same width), as opposed to variable-width fonts, in which some characters like 'I' are narrower than others. This is partly because fixed horizontal alignment is sometimes useful when dealing with certain text strings. 'Variable-width variables' refers to the fact that the letter X, like all letters, has different widths in different fonts. This would make this fixed alignment almost impossible, thus creating yet another reason why Cueball's language would be highly unpleasant to use.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[Cueball holds a laptop with code visible on the screen.]
:Cueball: I've developed a new programming language!
:Offpanel voice: Didn't a judge order you to stop doing that?

:[In a frameless panel, Cueball holds the laptop with one hand and types on the keyboard.]
:Cueball: Higher court threw out the ruling!
:Cueball: I'm back, suckers!
:Offpanel voice: ''Dammit.''

:[Cueball holds the folded down laptop at his side.]
:Cueball: But I promise it's good this time!
:Cueball: Just normal code. Good clean syntax. Nothing weird.
:Offpanel voice: Okay...

:[Cueball holds the laptop at his side, and raises a finger on his other hand.]
:Cueball: Except the only variable name is "X". To refer to different variables you have to write "X" in different fonts.
:Offpanel voice: I'm calling the court.
:Another offpanel voice: Maybe we can appeal.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category: Programming]]

Talk:2180: Spreadsheets

2019-07-24T21:48:58Z

Misterblu28:

I really hope Randall shares this formula he made. It sounds incredible. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.126.34|162.158.126.34]] 21:15, 24 July 2019 (UTC)

My unofficial job title is the Head of the Department for Extreme Spreadsheeting. There are multiple reasons for this, including that we need to share info easily across different offices, I'm very familiar with spreadsheet formulas, and I have no f***ing clue how to get a SQL database functioning properly. [[User:Misterblu28|Misterblu28]] ([[User talk:Misterblu28|talk]]) 21:48, 24 July 2019 (UTC)misterblue28