explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1642: Gravitational Waves

2022-06-01T19:12:40Z

Not so Kynde:

{{comic
| number = 1642
| date = February 11, 2016
| title = Gravita[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegianstional Waves
| image = gravitational waves.png
| titletext = "That last LinkedIn request set a new record for the most energetic physical event ever observed. Maybe we should respond." "Nah."
}}

==Explanation==
[[Megan]], [[Cueball]], and [[Ponytail]] are observing the results from a {{w|gravitational wave detector}} (see [[#Gravitational waves|details below]]). This comic came out on the day that the first direct observation of gravitational waves was [http://www.nature.com/news/einstein-s-gravitational-waves-found-at-last-1.19361 publicly announced] on 2016-02-11. The {{w|Gravitational wave observation|actual event}} was recorded five months before on 2015-09-14, but it was not reported publicly before they were sure it was a real signal. It seems that [[Randall]] knew in advance about this announcement because this comic was [[:Category:Thursday comics|published on a Thursday]], not following the normal publish schedule, to coincide with the [https://www.theguardian.com/science/2016/feb/11/gravitational-waves-discovery-hailed-as-breakthrough-of-the-century announcement], and there were no other comics released Friday that week. (The altered schedule could be viewed as a meta-reference to the {{w|Time warp (science fiction)|warping}} of {{w|spacetime}}.) That scientists knew there might be an announcement on the way, and more details for the interested can be seen in these two videos from ''Space Time'': ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Tstyqz2g7o Have Gravitational Waves Been Discovered?!?]'' and ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gw-i_VKd6Wo LIGO's First Detection of Gravitational Waves!]'' (See also their follow up [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJ2RNBAFLj0 The Future of Gravitational Waves]).

This is the second time within a month that a new astronomical announcement (of something discovered months before the actual announcement) has resulted in a related comic. The first being [[1633: Possible Undiscovered Planets]].

From the patterns in the {{w|gravitational waves}} detected by this instrument, it might be possible to guess the nature of the event (e.g. two bodies with dissimilar masses circling a fixed point, two bodies with equal mass circling each other, collision of two massive bodies, etc.). It might also be possible to triangulate the location of the event. Based on these two facts (the location and nature of the event) we might be able to determine which astronomical bodies caused this event (and the status of those bodies afterwards). Thus, it provides an additional medium to observe the universe in addition to {{w|telescopes}} observing all kinds of {{w|electromagnetic radiation}}. This new medium might enable us to observe properties that we couldn't observe with the rest of our observation instruments.

However, the scientists in this comic appear to be receiving more than the expected signals from {{w|black hole}} collisions, they also receive gravitational {{w|Messaging spam|spam messages}}, such as invitations from {{w|Linkedin}}, a {{w|Mortgage loan|mortgage}} offer, and an announcement of a social meet-up, rather than observing astronomical events (see [[#Explanation of observed events|table below]]).

There is also a joke on the social meet-up's use of the word ''local group'' because the '{{w|Local Group}}' is also the technical name for the group of galaxies containing the {{w|Milky Way}}.

It is not clear if these so-called "events" are causing gravitational waves to be generated or if something, perhaps an alien civilization, is encoding spam messages in gravitational waves. It is plausible that aliens are using gravity waves to encode their messages, as we do something similar with electromagnetic waves to encode and send our messages. However, it would take an extremely advanced civilization to achieve gravity wave encoding. It requires the controlling of orbits and oscillations of super-massive bodies like the Sun, or more likely bodies ten times more massive than it. For example, the first event detected, both in this comic and in real life, was a merger of two black holes of roughly 30 solar masses each.

The title text makes the speculation, that something is sending spam encoded in gravity waves, seem more plausible, as it follows up with a joke that the message senders have gone to such a length that they caused the most energetic event recorded ever (perhaps on the scale of a few {{w|supernovae}} or black hole collisions). One of the scientists is so impressed with this effort that he suggests that they actually post a reply, but one of the other person declines with a "''Nah''"! (As you should always do with spam, else you will just encourage the sender by making it clear that there actually is a receiver on this address.) Randall may have been referring to the fact that the detected event had a power output equal to 50 times that of the entire visible universe.

In [[1365: Inflation]] gravitational waves are also mentioned.

===Gravitational waves===
A gravitational wave detector is a device used to measure gravitational waves, small distortions of spacetime that were first predicted by {{w|Albert Einstein}} in 1916. Gravitational waves are ripples in the spacetime fabric itself.

In layman terms, a gravitational wave is like moving a stone through water while partly submerged. It will cause waves on the surface of the water as it moves through it. These waves will spread away from the center of disturbance and as they move, they will cause the water molecules to oscillate around their mean positions. Similar waves are created in the space-time fabric when two celestial bodies interact with each other. If you concentrate on an area of the fabric far away from the point of disturbance, it can be observed that if the wave causes compression in one direction, it'll cause expansion of the fabric in the other. See [http://www.einstein-online.info/spotlights/gw_waves this page] for nice animations.

Note that anything with a mass will cause a gravitational wave. Just as waves created by small stones are tiny in comparison to waves created by huge rocks in water, the waves from humans moving around will be tiny compared to the waves created by celestial bodies. Also, the bigger the body, the stronger the wave and the farther away it can be detected. That is why we can only detect gravity waves from heavy bodies like black holes or neutron stars but not from us moving around.

Now, let's consider spacetime fabric as a thin rubber sheet. If you mark any two points on this sheet and stretch or compress it along the axis joining those two points, the relative positions of these points with respect to their neighboring points do not change, but the distance between them changes.

{{w|LIGO}} (Laser Interferometer Gravitational-Wave Observatory) is a large-scale physics experiment designed to detect this compression/expansion, and it was LIGO who discovered the signal that caused this comic. (For a very detailed description of what the team at LIGO did and the history behind see this 90 minutes feature [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xj6vV3T4ok8 Gravitational Waves: A New Era of Astronomy Begins] from the 2016 World Science Festival).

Two facts need to be remembered to easily understand the experiment. First, the {{w|speed of light}} (c) is constant and the speed of an object is the distance moved divided by the time taken to travel that far. Second, gravitational waves cause opposite effects (compression and expansion) in directions perpendicular to each other. At LIGO, an experiment is set up where two perpendicular long tunnels are constructed with apparatus to emit and detect laser beams. The beam from a laser is split into these two tunnels. After going through the tunnel and back again a few times the beams are brought back together. The lengths of the tunnels are set up in such a way that, in the absence of gravity waves, destructive interference between the two combined beams causes them to cancel one another out, resulting in the detector observing zero light intensity. When the gravitational wave passes through earth, one of the tunnel is expected to expand while the other is expected to compress. Due to the difference in lengths, the destructive interference is incomplete and the detectors will be able to detect the presence of light. This observation can be concluded as "detection of the gravitational wave passing through".

==Explanation of observed events==
{| class="wikitable"
| | '''Event'''
| | '''Explanation'''
|-
| | Black hole merger in Carina (30 M☉, 30 M☉)
| |
Possibly legitimate result from the gravitational wave detector. M☉ means 1 {{w|Solar Mass}} (1.98892×1030 kg). So the statement means that {{w|Binary black hole|two black holes}}, each one 30 times more massive than our Sun were observed {{w|Stellar collision|merging}} in the {{w|Carina (constellation)|Carina constellation}}. This observation is similar to the one actually reported in the announcement on the day of this comic, were the two black holes had masses of 36 and 29 solar masses (with an uncertainty that meant they could have had masses as close as 32 and 30 solar masses vs the 30+30 in this event). Also the {{w|Gravitational wave observation#Location of the event|location of the event}} matches with Carina. Although at present time it is not possible to pinpoint the location of the event (that will need more detectors spread out across Earth) they still manage to find out that it most likely originated in the {{w|Southern Celestial Hemisphere}}, which is also where the Carina constellation is located.
|-
| | Zorlax the Mighty would like to connect on Linkedin
| |
A typical LinkedIn request. As this may be a message encoded in gravitational waves, it either means that LinkedIn has now grown outside the Earth, or that the Zorlax person would like to contact Earth. Zorlax is likely a reference to a kid's television gameshow, based on time travel, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdGGL0OrmFs Zorlax and the Time Travellers]. The first sentence in the movie is: ''Four billions of years ago in the Earths core, destined to be the master of time he is the Mighty Zorlax''. It is likely someone with the power over time would be able to create gravitational waves at his own leisure.
|-
| | Black hole merger in Orion (20 M☉, 50 M☉)
| |
Again, a possibly legitimate observation from the gravitational wave detector. It detected a black hole merger of two bodies in the {{w|Orion (constellation)|Orion constellation}}. One of them is 20 times more massive than Sun, the other is 50 times more massive than the Sun. As Orion is located at the {{w|celestial equator}} and since the masses are far from the one announced on the day of this comic, this would then represent a possible 2nd event to be measured later.
|-
| | Mortgage offer from Triangulum Galaxy
| |
{{w|Triangulum Galaxy}}, also known as Pinwheel Galaxy, is a {{w|spiral galaxy}} approximately 3 million light-years from Earth. It is the third largest galaxy in the Local Group after the {{w|Andromeda Galaxy}} and the Milky Way, these three being the only spiral galaxies in the group. This is presumably an offer to extend a loan, with a house on Earth serving as collateral. However, unless we develop {{w|wormholes}} or {{w|faster-than-light}} travel technologies, it will be difficult to submit an application, even if the offer is legitimate.
|-
| | Zorlax the Mighty would like to connect on Linkedin
| |
Same person who sent us LinkedIn invite moments ago. This repeated request may imply that Zorlax is desperate, or may be a jab at LinkedIn's persistence in spamming users with unaccepted connections to view and/or accept them. According to the title text, this was the most energetic physical event ever observed; it may be that Zorlax is demonstrating his capabilities in the hopes that the request would be accepted.
|-
| | Meet lonely singles in the local group tonight!
| |
The space advertisers are using space-GeoIP technology on a galactic scale to send spam. A Local Group is the technical term for the group of nearby galaxies that also includes the Milky Way, our own galaxy. There are more than 54 galaxies and few other celestial objects in our local group. This Local Group along with several others form the {{w|Virgo Supercluster}}. It would seem that the advertiser is targeting ads to everyone in the Virgo Supercluster. However, finding "lonely singles" in the 54 galaxies within our local group might be easier said than done for humans here on Earth. Another joke is that human race has been trying to find not just "lonely singles" but any lifeforms beyond Earth for the past few decades and hasn't been able to find them successfully. It seems that gravitational wave detector in the cartoon helped with this mission as well. This kind of spam was previously featured in [[713: GeoIP]].
|}

==Transcript==
:[Cueball, with arms up, is standing behind Megan who has her hands at her mouth, and who in turn is standing behind Ponytail, who is sitting in front of a large computer console with a screen, a keyboard, and several items on the side (presumably lights and labels). Three wires lead away from the console out of the image to the right.]
:Megan: The gravitational wave detector works! For the first time, we can listen in on the signals carried by ripples in the fabric of space itself!

:[Larger panel with the same setting in the middle, but both Cueball and Megan have taken their arms down. More of the wires from the console can be seen to the right. The computer lists six events:]
:Computer: '''''Event:''''' Black hole merger in Carina (30 M☉, 30 M☉)
:Computer: '''''Event:''''' Zorlax the Mighty would like to connect on Linkedin
:Computer: '''''Event:''''' Black hole merger in Orion (20 M☉, 50 M☉)
:Computer: '''''Event:''''' Mortgage offer from Triangulum Galaxy
:Computer: '''''Event:''''' Zorlax the Mighty would like to connect on Linkedin
:Computer: '''''Event:''''' Meet lonely singles in the local group tonight!

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Space]]
[[Category:Social networking]]
[[Category:Physics]]

1027: Pickup Artist

2022-06-01T19:12:29Z

Not so Kynde:

{{comic
| number = 1027
| date = March 9, 2012
| title = Pic[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegianskup Artist
| image = pickup_artist.png
| titletext = Son, don't try to play 'make you feel bad' with the Michael Jordan of making you feel bad.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Hairy]] and [[Cueball]] are sitting at a table with drinks. Hairy tells Cueball that he's learned some {{w|pickup artist}} tricks. Cueball is appalled, declaring that pickup artists are "dehumanizing creeps". Hairy argues that he's simply learning new tactics such as "[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=negging negging]" (undercutting the target's self-esteem so that she'll feel vulnerable and crave approval), evidently oblivious to the fact that he's proving Cueball's point. Rejecting Cueball's advice to simply talk to women "like a fucking human being", Hairy sets off to try out the technique.

Meanwhile, [[Black Hat]] and [[Danish]] are sitting at another table. Black Hat leaves to roll a bowling ball through the restroom stalls to smash the feet of anyone there using them. In North America, public restrooms usually have a 1-foot (30 cm) gap between the floor and the bottom of the stall dividers. As people sit down to use a stall most of the time, their feet would be vulnerable to being hit in sequence. Perhaps Black Hat is going for a 'strike'. Hairy approaches Danish, while Cueball looks on and says "oh no" — seemingly recognizing Danish and anticipating the disaster Hairy is walking into, or perhaps simply not wanting Hairy to use his tricks on anyone.

Hairy makes an attempt at "negging" by suggesting that Danish's fruit plate reflects a need to lose weight. Danish, naturally being a master at psychological manipulation, immediately realizes his game, and crushes him utterly by taking [[440: Road Rage|another shot in the psychological dark]] — telling him that he's trapped in an endless cycle of failure because he's ultimately a mediocre person and will never do anything of value with his life. Demoralized, Hairy declares that he needs to go home and think about his life; Danish tells him, "It won't help.” (This may be a reference to the "deathsticks" scene in ''Star Wars: Attack of the Clones''.) Of course, once Black Hat discovers his shenanigans, Hairy might not have much more life to rethink.

The title text refers to {{w|Michael Jordan}}, a very popular and accomplished {{w|basketball}} player who played for the {{w|Chicago Bulls}} and the {{w|Washington Wizards}}. His name is often used as a noun to denote that someone is the best in their field, which is later used in [[1120: Blurring the Line]].

The pick up subject and Hairy returned in [[1178: Pickup Artists]], where he tries to improve his skills (which he must have felt he needed after this experience), by hanging out with other pickup artists, thus the plural version of the comic title. This comic is one of a small set of comics with the same or almost the same title as another comic (only plural form of artist the difference).

==Transcript==
:[Hairy and Cueball sitting at a table.]
:Hairy: I've been learning tricks from pickup artist forums.
:Cueball: Pickup artists are dehumanizing creeps who see relationships as adversarial and women as sex toys.

:[Close-up of Hairy's head, with a faint outline of Black hat and Danish sitting at a table in the background.]
:Hairy: No, it's just a bunch of tips! Like ''negging'': you belittle chicks to undermine their self-confidence so they'll be more vulnerable and seek your approval.

:[Close-up of Cueball's head.]
:Cueball: Just talk to them like a fucking human being.
:Hairy: Nah, that's a sucker's game.
:Hairy: Ok— wish me luck!

:[Small frame across top of panel reads ''Meanwhile...'' and Danish is sitting at a table with Black hat standing next to the table holding a bowling ball under his arm.]
:Black Hat: I'm going to the bathroom to roll a bowling ball down under the line of stalls.
:Danish: Cool.

:[Close up of Cueball's head, with Hairy approaching Danish's table in the background.]
:Cueball: Oh no.

:[Hairy and Danish at a table. Hairy is standing up and leaning on the table.]
:Hairy: You look like you're on a diet. That's great!
:Hairy: How's the fruit plate?

:[Close-up of Danish's head.]
:Danish: Ooh- are we negging?
:Danish: Let me try!

:[Close-up of Danish's head, with her hand raised.]
:Danish: You look like you're going to spend your life having one epiphany after another, always thinking you've finally figured out what's holding you back, and how you can finally be productive and creative and turn your life around.
:Danish: But nothing will ever change. That cycle of mediocrity isn't due to some obstacle. It's who you ''are''.
:Danish: The thing standing in the way of your dreams
:Danish: is that the person having them is ''you''.

:[Hairy and Danish at a table. Hairy is standing up.]
:Danish: Ok, your turn! Ooh, try insulting my hair!
:Hairy: I think I need to go home and think about my life.
:Danish: It won't help.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Danish]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]]
[[Category:Romance]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Pickup Artist01]]

1735: Fashion Police and Grammar Police

2022-06-01T19:12:18Z

Not so Kynde:

{{comic
| number = 1735
| date = September 19, 2016
| title = Fashion P[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegiansolice and Grammar Police
| image = fashion_police_and_grammar_police.png
| titletext = * Mad about jorts
}}

==Explanation==
In this comic, two groups of angry protesters are presented and labeled. They are probably not actually protesting side by side, but simply drawn side by side to compare their similarities.

The left group represents the '''Fashion Police''' with [[Cueball]] holding a sign implying that {{w|Crocs}} are prohibited (by showing Crocs shoe/sandall in a circle with a strike through it). Crocs are a type of {{w|Clog|clogs}} made of foam. Crocs (and their imitators) have become fairly popular due to their low price, comfort, and ease of use, but are broadly considered {{w|Crocs#Fashion| unfashionable to wear in public}}. It is not the first time [[Randall]] mocks a special type of shoes, previously in [[1065: Shoes]] Randall was after shoes that ''has those creepy individual toes'' like {{w|Vibram FiveFingers}}. They will also never be a hit with the Fashion Police.{{Citation needed}}

The right group represents the '''Grammar Police''' with another Cueball holding a sign with three homophones: [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/their Their] (belongs to them), [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/they%27re They're] (contraction meaning "they are"), [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/there There] (a location). These words, due to their common usage and identical pronunciation are frequently confused for one another, with one spelling being used in a context meant for a different one, causing the Grammar Police to quickly intervene (see [[386: Duty Calls]]). See the [https://twitter.com/_grammar_ Grammar Police on Twitter] and also {{w|Grammar Police|Linguistic prescription}} which comes up on Wikipedia when searching for Grammar Police.

The two groups look similar, standing in similar poses, with one Cueball holding signs in each group, and [[Megan]] in the front line of both groups. Each group also has one member brandishing a sword, indicating the exaggerated level of intensity they feel about their respective causes.

Both types of people will correct, criticize, denigrate or mock those who fail to conform to their criteria for what is "correct". Fashion police oppose people wearing clothing that's mismatched, out of style/{{w|fashion}} or simply "ugly" to them. Grammar police are "sticklers" for {{w|grammar}} rules and have an immediate negative reaction when someone uses non-standard grammar in a sentence. These two groups are generally seen as socially separate, and their goals appear very distinct, but the comic explains how the two groups are actually very similar. This is demonstrated by listing eight characteristics (plus a ninth in the title text) common to both groups. See explanation in the [[#Table of individual items|table below]].

In the caption below the comic Randall notes that he just realized that these are literally the same people because they both exhibit the listed traits.

It seems like a safe assumption (see [[1339: When You Assume]]) that there are more grammar pedants (see title text of [[1652: Conditionals]]) than fashion police people who read xkcd, and it also would seem likely that many xkcd readers would dislike the Fashion Police. This comic may, therefore, be intended to point out to grammar pedants that their behavior is functionally similar to that of other people who they dislike. Ponytail also represented the grammar police in [[1576: I Could Care Less]], where Megan puts her in place after she polices her sentence; this thus shows what Randall thinks about such police work and supports the above assumption. In 1576: I Could Care Less, "literally" was also used in the title text.

Randall is, with regards to language, definitely one of those that can belong in this group: ''To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well.''

The title is a ninth point to add to the list, with the asterisk in front representing one more bullet. See the last entry in the [[#Table of individual items|table below]] for more:

==Table of individual items==
{| class="wikitable"
|+Explanation of individual items in the list
!list item
!Explanation
|-
|Judgemental and Smug || Both groups tend to feel very comfortable in their own mastery of their particular field, and are frequently condescending to those who either lack their expertise, or are uninterested in meeting their standards.
|-
|Angry about something deeply arbitrary || Both grammar and fashion are, essentially, made-up human constructs.
|-
| Strong opinions backed by style guides || Grammar has ''{{w|The Elements of Style}}'', fashion has fashion magazines.
|-
| Appreciate that the way that you are interpreted is your responsibility || Whether or not you're interested in fashion or 'proper' grammar, how you dress and speak will impact how others perceive you, and often how they treat you. Whether this is fair or not, it is a reality, and each person is responsible for how they present themselves.
|-
| Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own || As above, our dress and speech will be taken by others as sending messages about ourselves. Trying to ignore the rules of either grammar or fashion is, itself, a message, as it presents to the world that we refuse to live by this set of rules. Whether or not we're trying to convey that message, it is what will come across.
|-
|To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well || People who appear to not understand the rules of either grammar or fashion will often be seen as ignorant or low-class. On the other hand, deliberately ignoring rules of either when its clear that you've mastered them comes across as casual, since it's clear that you're choosing to play with the rules, rather than simply not knowing them.
|-
|Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class || This is probably the most impactful observation. Rules around fashion and grammar, being arbitrary, are generally set by the most powerful classes in any society, which often run along racial lines as well. As a result, the "proper" way to dress or speak generally remains associated with those classes. This association can be pragmatic, such as "fashionable" clothing being more expensive and hard for poor people to acquire, or it may simply be cultural, as 'proper' grammar is whatever's spoken in wealthy neighborhoods and schools, while language variants associated with poor people and minority groups is bluntly denounced as 'wrong', even if it has a fully consistent internal grammar. Similarly, fashions that are associated with poor and non-white social groups are broadly considered to be inappropriate, even if the reasons are arbitrary. As a result, such things become signifiers by which one can present oneself as being part of a social class. In America, it would be socially unacceptable to reject a job applicant because they grew up poor, and illegal to do so because of their race. However, rejecting an applicant for using 'improper' grammar, or for not wearing the right clothing or hairstyle, is standard practice. Randall identifies this fact as "uncomfortably transparent".
|-
| Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you|| As with any arbitrary set of rules, those that we're in agreement and comfortable with are easy to promote, and we may enjoy taking part in the condemnation of others. But that suddenly changes when we find ourselves on the outside, condemned for our own use of language or how we dress. At that point, the flaws of such groups become much harder to ignore.
|-
| Mad about jorts (Title text) || "{{w|Shorts#Jorts|Jorts}}" is a {{w|portmanteau}} for a pair of jeans that are made into shorts.

The fashion police would be mad about jorts for being unfashionable.

The grammar police would be mad about the word 'jorts' being an inappropriate portmanteau of jeans and shorts, and also for the fact that the sentence could be misinterpreted as if someone likes jorts, as in being "mad about" something in a positive way.

{{w|Sentence_clause_structure#Incomplete_sentence|Also a fragment}}, with no subject (properly it would be "I am mad about jorts" or "They are mad about jorts"). Randall has [[:Category:Portmanteau|often used]] portmanteaus as part of his jokes.

It is also possible that the Grammar police are indeed "mad about Jorts" in the positive sense, i.e Grammar Police love Jorts.
|}

==Transcript==
:[Beneath two headings to the left and right are shown two aggressive-looking groups of people with only the four people in the front clearly shown for each group. Behind them five other people can be seen, but they are not drawn with the same solid line and are only partly shown behind the first four, but legs from all five in each group can be seen along with some heads (all Cueball like) and arms etc. The front of the left group consist of Hairy holding a fist up towards left, Megan with her arms crossed in front of her chest, Cueball holding a sign, using both hands, straight up above his head and another Cueball-like guy to the right is holding up a broken branch in one hand toward right. The person behind this last person is shown to hold up his fist towards right like Hairy does to the left. The sign shows a Crocs shoe in a circle with a strike through it going above the Crocs from top left to bottom right. The front of the right group consist of Megan holding both her arms over her head hands folded into fist while looking towards left, Cueball holding a sign, using both hands, towards the right and up above Ponytails head, she is raising one hand in a fist to the left and finally a bald guy with glasses is brandishing a short sword in one hand toward right while holding his other hand palm up. The sign has three similar words written beneath each other.]
:Left: Fashion Police
:Right: Grammar Police
:Sign:
::Their
::They're
::There

:[Below the two groups are eight points with bullets:]
:*Judgemental and smug
:*Angry about something deeply arbitrary
:*Strong opinions backed by style guides
:*Appreciate that the way that you are interpreted ''is'' your responsibility
:*Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own
:*To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well
:*Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class
:*Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I just realized these are literally the same people

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Portmanteau]]
[[Category:Pedantic]]

1714: Volcano Types

2022-06-01T19:12:09Z

Not so Kynde:

{{comic
| number = 1714
| date = August 1, 2016
| title = Volcan[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegianso Types
| image = volcano_types.png
| titletext = It's hard living somewhere with antlions, because every time you find one of their traps, you feel compelled to spend all day constructing a tiny model of Jabba's sail barge next to it.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic presents a table of 12 different types of volcano. Split into 3 rows, the first 4 are authentic types of volcano; while the remaining 8 are parodies, one not even trying to represent a volcano but shows a real animal in its inverted trap cone.

Volcanoes have featured in many xkcd comics, [[media:1608 Entire Volcano plateau zoom out_extra.png|most prominently]] in the left part of the world (the Lord of the Rings section) of [[1608: Hoverboard]]. This comic's volcano looks like it could soon turn into a Somma volcano.

===Real volcanoes===
*{{w|Cinder cone}}: small, steep-sided volcano formed of {{w|scoria}} and ash.
*{{w|Shield volcano}}: wide, rounded volcano formed of solidified lava flow.
*{{w|Stratovolcano}}: large volcano formed of layers (strata) from multiple eruptions.
*{{w|Somma volcano}}: new volcanic cone in the middle of an old collapsed volcanic crater.

===Joke volcanoes===
*Metasomma volcano: nested layers of somma volcanos i.e. a whole set of new volcanoes (three in this situation) formed inside of old ones. "Meta" is a prefix that often denotes recursion. (Although this is a joke volcano, metasomma volcanoes do actually exist in real life, with one example being the {{w|Krakatoa}} group in Indonesia.)
*{{w|Waffle cone}}: type of pastry that ice cream is served in, related to volcano cones only insofar as they are the same shape, but typically the waffle cones are turned the other way up to keep the ice cream inside. If the tip of the waffle cone is not filled with solid chocolate or similar, then the contents may very well melt and run out the bottom like the smoke coming out at the very tip of the Waffle cone volcano.
*Science fair cone: common elementary science experiment that is often used as a project for science fairs. A structure is built to resemble a model volcano and is filled with a mix of baking soda, vinegar, and sometimes food coloring. The reaction between baking soda and vinegar quickly produces a large amount of carbon dioxide, creating a foam that overflows and mimics a volcanic eruption. In this picture, there are people running away from the volcano that are much smaller than it. This is likely a reference to [[1611: Baking Soda and Vinegar]], either the scale-model people on the first volcano, or real people running from the baking soda supervolcano (in this case two [[Cueball]]-like guys and [[Megan]]).
*Doot cone: This may likely be a reference to the meme of the [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/skull-trumpet skull-trumpet] where the trumpet playing skull [https://www.reddit.com/r/OutOfTheLoop/comments/39xnk2/what_is_this_doot_thing_with_the_skeletons/cs7jdsa produces the sound Doot] as a large part of the meme. Doot is also a fart sound; a doot cone could be just ejecting farts instead of lava.
**There has been some discussion about if this is likely, with someone referencing the [https://www.amazon.com/Florida-DOT-Approved-Traffic-Cone/dp/B009RUTKZA DOT cones], traffic cones approved by DOT or the {{w|Department of transportation}} in the US.
**Also there have been mention of ''{{w|Dot-com}}'' coming close to ''Doot cone''. The {{w|Dot-com bubble}} could be said to burst, just like this volcano bursts/erupts.
*{{w|Antlion}}: An antlion is the larva of an insect known as the lacewing, and is commonly called a doodlebug. These insects dig pits in the sand to use as traps; when a bug comes along and falls in, the sand collapses and falls on the bug, making it very difficult to escape. The antlion then eats the unsuspecting prey. Maybe a reference to {{w|Formica Leo}}, a small volcanic crater in the Reunion island named after the antlion. Also, a recurring boss villain in the video game Final Fantasy series, as well as an enemy in the Half Life series. Also appears in the {{w|List_of_Moomin_(1990)_episodes|Moomin (1990) TV series}} as a literal black lion.
*Inverse Volcano: as the name implies, a regular volcano but reversed. A real volcano consists of solid rock on the outside, magma on the inside and spewing lava from the top. This one is made of lava with rocks erupting out of it.
*Ghost Vent: cone with ghosts coming out of it.
*Pedant's Bane: the joke is that people sometimes confuse magma and lava, which are different names for the same heated liquid rock. Magma becomes lava when it emerges from a volcano. The Pedant's Bane volcano is therefore impossible by definition, but if it were possible, then a {{w|pedant}} would have met his [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/bane#Etymology_1 bane] (i.e. his downfall), because when he corrected someone's description of this volcano, the pedant would actually be wrong. Alternatively, the illustration itself could be Pedant's Bane because a pedant would be lured into pointing out how wrong it is. This is a direct reference to the pedant in [[1405: Meteor]].

The title text refers to a famous scene in ''{{w|Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi}}'' where {{w|Jabba the Hutt}} intends to feed {{w|Luke Skywalker}} to the {{w|Sarlacc|sarlacc}}, an underground creature that builds a huge funnel trap similar to that of an antlion. [[wikia:c:starwars:Khetanna|Jabba's distinctive sail barge]] features prominently in that scene, and when Randall comes upon an antlion he can't help himself starting to build a scale model next to the antlion's inverted cone. Given how small antlions are, this will be very difficult to do, see for instance [[878: Model Rail]].

==Transcript==
:[Twelve drawings in four rows of different "volcano" types, the first four real, and some not even volcanoes of any sort, real or fake. Below each panel is a caption with the name of the drawn volcano. Some of the volcanoes have labels or sound written inside the panel. Each of the volcanoes has a baseline for the ground going straight a short distance over the bottom of each panel. All 11 volcanoes lie on top of this line, but some show the inside of the volcano going further into the ground.]

:[Standard cone shaped volcano, with straight sides sloping up to a triangular shape, but with the tip of the cone cut off to form the central jagged edged crater. White smoke rises straight up and then drifts to the left forming three separate clouds.]
:Cinder Cone

:[Flat rounded shaped volcano, as a part of a circle. There is not a real crater visible but from the center a thin plume of smoke rises up, drift drifts to the left and forms a small white cloud.]
:Shield Volcano

:[This is the largest volcano. The tip of this volcano is similar to the first volcano, but with more uneven slopes and a bit smaller. The tip is clearly separated from the bottom section by a thin jagged line, and below the sides of the volcano decreases their slope, so they are less steep than the tip. Black smoke rises straight up from the crater and then drifts to the left in four thin lines.]
:Stratovolcano

:[A wide volcano spans the entire panel, with a large central crater, with a bottom baseline far above the ground level. Just left of the middle of this crater is a standard smaller volcano cone, very similar to the shape of the tip in the previous panel. Even the smoke from this cones small crater is similar to the previous panels.]
:Somma Volcano

:[The central part of this volcano is the same shape as the previous panel. This could be a zoom out, revealing that the large crater, is at the center on an even larger crater, which again is at the center of a crater that spans the panel. A plume of black smoke rises from the centeral cones crater, and drifts left as five white clouds.]
:Metasomma Volcano

:[A perfect cone-shape, triangular and steep, with checkered ice cone waffle texture, even with a line indicating where the waffle has been a folded. It looks like a road up the volcano. Black smoke drift up from the sharp tip, no crater, and drifts left forming a small cloud separated from the rest of the smoke lines.]
:Waffle Cone

:[Standard cone as in the first, but zoomed in so it fills the panel from left to right. The volcano's top has been cut much further down leaving a wide crater from which lava is pouring down the sides in large rivers of different width and length. To the left one long river has almost reached the ground. Cueball is running down the left side, and Megan is running after another Cueball with his arms up on the right side. There is a label with an arrow pointing to the lava:]
:Label: Baking soda and vinegar
:Science Fair Cone

:[Standard cone like the previous, but with more jagged sloped and crater. This volcano erupts with a large explosion with fire and smoke coming out in all directions above the crater. A large sound is written above the explosion:]
:Sound. <big>'''Doooooot'''</big>
:Doot Cone

:[This is not a volcano, but the inverse, a cone down into the ground, the ground level no above the center of the panel. The slope down into this cone hole is straight, the ground above is more jagged. At the bottom of the hole sits a small animal with six legs and an open mouth piece sticking up out of the hole. Its fat body is hidden under the ground along with its legs.]
:Antlion

:[Standard volcano cone like the previous volcano. It erupts and the central part shows how the erupting material comes up from below ground level (below the line at the bottom in which the cone it self stands). The erupting material is white rocks on black background. At the top several rocks is blown out of the crater top. The sides of the volcano is filled with blobs small and large, and stones rolling down the sides. There are two labels, each with two arrows. The first labels arrows points to the side of the volcano, the second labels arrows points to the erupting material inside and outside the volcano:]
:First label: Lava
:Second label: Solid rocks
:Inverse Volcano

:[Standard cone like the doot cone, with a crater that bends down in the middle. From this crater eight white ghosts with two black eyes are rising, like the smoke, drifting left. The highest ghost is just reaching the edge at the top left of the panel. The lowest ghost is still inside the crater with its wavy lower parts.]
:Ghost Vent

:[A standard cone like the doot cone. At the top there is lave over the outer edges, some of it running down the side. The inside of the volcano has been drawn like in the inverse volcano, so it is clear that the magma inside the volcano comes up from below ground level (below the line at the bottom in which the cone it self stands). There are two labels that contradicts the description above. The top label outside the volcano points to the lava with an arrow, and the bottom label inside the volcano points to the magma:]
:Top label: Magma
:Bottom label: Lava
:Pedant's Bane

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Volcanoes]]
[[Category:Food]] 
[[Category:Animals]] 
[[Category:Star Wars]]

[[Category:Pedantic]]

651: Bag Check

2022-06-01T19:12:00Z

Not so Kynde:

{{comic
| number = 651
| date = October 19, 2009
| title = Bag C[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegiansheck
| image = bag_check.png
| titletext = A laptop battery contains roughly the stored energy of a hand grenade, and if shorted it... hey! You can't arrest me if I prove your rules inconsistent!
}}

==Explanation==
[[Cueball]] argues with a {{w|Transportation Security Administration|TSA}} agent at an airport security checkpoint over the TSA policy of prohibiting airline passengers from bringing liquids or gels in quantities greater than 3.4 ounces (100 ml) in their carry on items. To prove his point, Cueball points out that modifying the lithium ion battery in his laptop computer to be an explosive poses a more plausible risk to the aircraft than carrying an innocuous bottle of water. The joke is that now the security team is even MORE worried about him specifically and will take away his laptop and most likely detain him for questioning.

The title text continues Cueball's line of argument, segueing into a protest as the situation escalates to the point of Cueball apparently being placed under arrest. This is, however, a bit of an exaggeration, as for them to place someone under arrest, they need real reason to think that they are going to do something bad, and simply knowing this information is not enough to justify this action.

Interestingly, in 2017 a [http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/advice/laptop-ban-on-flights-to-middle-east-advice-help-for-travellers/ ban on laptops] and other large, battery-equipped devices (but not smartphones) in the cabin was initiated by the United States, and followed by other countries, with the stated aim of lowering the risk of somebody bringing an explosive onto the plane inside it. Granted, this was in response to a Somali incident where a bomber snuck a laptop loaded with actual explosives (not just the batteries) onto a plane, but the similarities are still quite evident.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Megan are at a security checkpoint in an airport. A guard is holding an open backpack and a bottle of water, and Cueball is arguing with him. Megan is facepalming.]
:Cueball: But if you're worried about bombs, why are you letting me keep my laptop batteries? If I overvolted them and breached the cells, it would make a sizeable explosion.
:Megan: Oh god.
:Cueball: It's okay, dear. In a moment he'll realize I have a good point and return my water.

==Trivia==
*The TSA [https://web.archive.org/web/20170630101802/https://www.tsa.gov/blog/2009/10/23/response-%E2%80%9Cbag-check%E2%80%9D-cartoon responded to this comic] in a blog post and Randall Munroe expounded on his intent in its comments.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Characters with hats]]

2627: Types of Scopes

2022-06-01T19:11:51Z

Not so Kynde:

{{comic
| number = 2627
| date = June 1, 2022
| title = Type[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegianss of Scopes
| image = types_of_scopes.png
| titletext = An x-ray gyroscope is used to determine exactly which toppings they included in the pita.
}}
[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians[[File:Flag of Norway.svg]]Wiki of norwegians
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BOTOSCOPE - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

''Electron microscopes'', ''electron telescopes'' and ''radio telescopes'' are special forms of microscopes and telescopes, respectively. This comic explores what you could do with a hypothetical "electron ___-scope" and "radio ___-scope" for other words also ending in -scope (namely: periscope, stethoscope, kaleidoscope, gyroscope and horoscope).

{| class="wikitable"
|+ What the words could mean according to the comic
|-
! Word !! Regular ___ !! Electron ___ !! Radio ___
|-
| Microscope || A laboratory instrument used for magnifying small objects. || ''Really exists:'' A microscope that uses a beam of accelerated electrons as a source of illumination, has a higher resolution than a conventional microscope. || Simply a microscope that one would use when repairing a radio.
|-
| Telescope || An optical instrument used for observing distant objects. || ''{{w|Calorimetric Electron Telescope|''Really exists''}}: A type of telescope used to detect electrons and other high-energy particles, such as cosmic rays.'' || ''Really exists:'' A directional antenna used to detect radio waves from astronomical radio sources in the sky.
|-
| Periscope || Periscopes allow submarine crews to watch what happens above the water surface, without exposing the submarine to enemy observers, or enemy radars. In practice, periscope use is minimized because periscopes are still observable, but to a lesser degree. || An electron microscope seemingly mounted on a periscope. Examining enemy boats like a periscope, with the detail of an electron microsope. This would not be useful in combat. || In principle, the German navy has invented radio periscopes during World War 2. The {{w|Metox radar detector}}'s early antenna had to be built up after surfacing, and dismantled before diving. Later, the fixed ''Bali'' antenna could act like a true periscope, in order to detect aircraft and ships that were using radar to hunt submarines.

Radio signals do not propagate well in water, so raising a radio receiver above the water would be necessary for listening to NPR or any radio station which is not in the {{w|extremely low frequency}} band.
|-
| Stethoscope
|| A medical device for listening to sounds made by a patient's body, for example the heart. Has a disc-shaped resonator that is placed against the patient's skin.
|| If the resonator is emitting electromagnetic radiation, it could burn the skin due to its close proximity.
|| Normally, the sounds are transmitted to an earpiece that the examiner wears. There are also recording stethoscopes. A radio stethoscope would transmit the sound either directly via radio waves, or send it to a radio station such as NPR where it could then be broadcasted.
|-
| Kaleidoscope || A optical instrument which uses two or more tilted reflectors to show a regular symmetrical pattern || Seemingly a pun of electron "collide"-oscope, as electron collisions generate {{w|Bremsstrahlung}}. ||
|-
| Gyroscope || Gyroscopes are used for {{w|inertial navigation}}, for example. || || In theory, radio waves could be sent around in a triangular pattern, thus replicating the existing {{w|ring laser gyroscope}}.
|-
| Horoscope
|| In common usage, predictions or advice given based on the position of stars and planets. Proven to be unscientific junk.
|| Predicting the position of a particle, such as an electron (possibly based on the position of stars and planets). In a funny twist, the exact location of an electron cannot be determined, due to Heisenberg's uncertainty principle.
|| Predictions or advice given based on the radiation emitted by exploding stars or galaxies.
|}

The third column often plays on different meanings of the word ''radio:'' 1) related to radiation and 2) a device for receiving radio communication or broadcasts.

The title text makes a pun on "gyroscope" and the Greek foods {{w|Gyros}} and {{w|Pita}}.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
Content is a table, with column headings "Regular ''Blank'' Scope", "Electron ''Blank'' Scope", and "Radio ''Blank'' Scope". Row headings are "Micro", "Tele", "Peri", "Stetho", "Kaleido", "Gyro", and "Horo".

;Regular Microscope
:Look at small stuff
;Electron Microscope
:Look at ''really'' small stuff
;Radio Microscope
:Figure out why your radio broke
;Regular Telescope
:Look at stuff that's far away
;Electron Telescope
:Detect cosmic rays
;Radio Telescope
:Look at distant high-energy stuff
;Regular Periscope
:Look for enemy ships
;Electron Periscope
:Examine the hull of an enemy ship for structural flaws
;Radio Periscope
:Let the crew of your submarine listen to NPR
;Regular Stethoscope
:Listen to a patient's chest
;Electron Stethoscope
:Burn a patient's skin
;Radio Stethoscope
:Play the noises from a patient's chest on NPR
;Regular Kaleidoscope
:See cool shapes and colors
;Electron Kaleidoscope
:See cool Bremsstrahlung
;Radio Kaleidoscope
:Another word for the "Scan" button
;Regular Gyroscope
:Balance by spinning
;Electron Gyroscope
:Another word for electromagnet
;Radio Gyroscope
:Another word for turntable
;Regular Horoscope
:Get random life advice
;Electron Horoscope
:Predict a particle's quantum state
;Radio Horoscope
:Get random life advice from exploding galaxies
{{comic discussion}}