2108: Carbonated Beverage Language Map

2019-02-07T05:06:12Z

Tellumo: Add Hawaii (except O'ahu) - Pepsi and Oahu - Crystal Pepsi

{{comic
| number = 2108
| date = February 6, 2019
| title = Carbonated Beverage Language Map
| image = carbonated_beverage_language_map.png
| titletext = There's one person in Missouri who says "carbo bev" who the entire rest of the country HATES.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a COMMUNIST SHILL. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

In the US, people in various parts of the country refer to carbonated beverages by {{w|Names for soft drinks in the United States|different names}} such as Soda, Pop, Coke, etc. Generally, the West Coast and Northeast say "Soda", the South says "Coke" and the rest of the country says "Pop".

There are various maps of the name differences, including: [http://www.popvssoda.com/]

This map leverages xkcd's mockery-maps of regional and state-by-state differences or variations in the use of language and overlays the regional variances in the terms for soda pop (for example: https://laughingsquid.com/soda-pop-or-coke-maps-of-regional-dialect-variation-in-the-united-states/), as was made trending and popular in 2013. Not only are there far more terms than are actually used by Americans, many are terms for other drinks (mead), unrelated liquids (quicksilver), or trademarked beverage names less popular than {{w|Coca Cola|Coke}}/{{w|Coca Cola}} ({{w|Mountain Dew|Code Red}}) -- and in one case, something that's not even tangible ({{w|cryptocurrency|"Crypto"}}).

{| class="wikitable"
|+Map terms (from left to right, approximately)
|-
|{{w|Fanta}}
|Name of a carbonated beverage line
|-
|Söde
|Presumably pronounced "soda" but spelled oddly
|-
|True Water
|Possibly a reference to Tru Blood, a fictional artificial blood substitute for vampires in ''{{w|The Southern Vampire Mysteries}}'' book series by Charlaine Harris, and the television series ''{{w|True Blood}}''. Also could be a reference to "purified" mineral waters such as {{w|Glaceau Smartwater|Smartwater}}.
|-
|Crypto
|A term meaning "hidden". Popularized as a slang term in the late '80s and early '90s to refer to anything involving the act of encryption and decryption through the application of ciphers, a practice which has become practically ubiquitous in the digital age. Cryptography is used extensively in: military communications; subscription media services including cable and satellite television; digital cellular networks; privacy oriented communications services such Telegram, Signal and WhatsApp; secured file storage; electronic locks; and distributed ledgers such as those used by "blockchain" based currencies\commodities. Crypto is not a liquid and therefore not drinkable. Possibly a joke that the residents of Silicon Valley are actually computers that "drink" crypto (i.e. data).

Crypto is also a shorthand way to refer to {{w|cryptocurrency}}.
|-
|Yum
|Refers to {{w|Yum! Brands}}, parent company of several fast food restaurants, which was spun off from PepsiCo, maker of a carbonated beverage, in 1997, and has a lifetime contract to serve their beverages.
|-
|Sparkle Fluid
|Roughly analogously to how "sparkling wine" and "sparkling cider" are carbonated varieties of wine and cider, "sparkling fluid" or "sparkle fluid" would presumably be any carbonated fluid
|-
|King Cola
|Name of a carbonated beverage
|-
|{{w|Pepsi}}
|Name of a carbonated beverage
|-
|{{w|Crystal Pepsi}}
|Name of a carbonated beverage
|-
|Ichor
|several definitions (blood of a god (or demon, or, in some dialects, any insect) or watery discharge from a wound). None of them carbonated. None of them recommended as a drinkable liquid. (Well, not by someone with your best interests at heart.)
|-
|You-Know-What
|A phrase typically employed when a more specific term is considered unspeakable.
|-
|{{w|Tab (drink)|Tab}}
|Name of a carbonated beverage
|-
|Spicewater
|Potentially a reference to the spice from ''Dune''.
|-
|Softie
|On the map, it looks like the region for Softie is taking a punch from the region for Punch
|-
|Ohio Tea
|The area in question covers much of Arizona, the namesake of {{w|Arizona Beverage Company|Arizona Iced Tea}}, itself a carbonated beverage. This is possibly a reference to that, by suggesting that, rather than refer to soda by the name of the one named after their state, they place an entirely different state's name before the word "Tea."

Could also refer to [https://youtu.be/0_XAPku7SgE?t=30 "...bubbling crude. Oil that is, black gold, '''Texas tea'''.]
|-
|Boat Drink
|
|-
|Melt
|Usually used to describe a kind of sandwich where cheese is melted in the center, usually on a griddle. Or maybe just a way to say "no, the *melted* ice"
|-
|Fizz Ooze
|The shortened name of the book "Fizz, Foam, Splatter & Ooze" about chemical reactions.
|-
|{{w|Punch (drink)|Punch}}
|A drink typically found in the juice aisle. Only sometimes carbonated. It's also a pun on the word punch, meaning to hit something, and on the map it looks like the region for Punch is literally punching the region for Softie.
|-
|Fun Wine
|Implies that normal wine is not "fun". Might be an allusion to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cheerwine Cheerwine], a carbonated drink from the Southeast.
|-
|Diet
|Sometimes refers to a carbonated beverage. A common request in restaurants, as they often only have a single "{{w|Diet drink|diet soda}}" option for customers to pick. Ironically, "diet" sodas have been causally linked to metabolism related weight gain.
|-
|Refill
|The second glass of whatever you drank previously. Works for any drinkable liquid.
|-
|Tickle Juice
|Name of a Boston-based jazz band.
|-
|Bubble Honey
|
|-
|Sugar Oil
|The areas of Oklahoma and north Texas that are shaded produce a significant amount of {{w|petroleum|crude oil}}.
|-
|The Wet Drink
|Technically true of all drinks, unless one is attempting to drink sand (or anhydrous fluids - of which the least harmful may be clarified butter). It may also refer to the fact that many advertisements for carbonated beverages attempt to make the product look more appetizing by photographing or filming a beverage container covered with water droplets.
|-
|{{w|Mountain Dew|Code Red}}
|Name of a carbonated beverage
|-
|{{w|Mead}}
|An alcoholic drink. Traditionally not carbonated. Often associated with Vikings, and these areas did have many Scandinavian immigrants.
|-
|Canadian Ale
|Probably a reference to the {{w|Canada Dry}} brand of {{w|Ginger Ale}}, a non-alcoholic carbonated beverage.
|-
|Aether
|Could refer to a highly flammable industrial solvent, also used as an anesthetic. Do not drink. Also, not carbonated. Alternately, could refer to the nonexistent fluid that was believed to carry light waves before electromagnetism was fully understood, or poetically to the sky; in either case it is not a drinkable liquid (or carbonated).
|-
|Carbonated Beverage
|Technically correct, but a bit of an awkward term due to its unnecessary length.
|-
|Mouthwater
|A play on the term "mouth watering" to describe delicious foods and drinks.
|-
|{{w|Capri Sun|Capri}}
|Capri Sun is a brand of juice drinks, typically sold in uncarbonated pouches.
|-
|Skim Shake
|A shortened name of the beverage "Skim Milkshake"
|-
|Kid's Coffee
|Somewhat accurate. Coffee is typically drunk by adults for its caffeine. Carbonated beverages often have caffeine also, and are often consumed by children.
|-
|Regular
|In the past, referred to gasoline with lead, as opposed to "Unleaded". Not a drinkable liquid, and also outlawed.
|-
|{{w|Tang (drink)|Tang}}
|An orange flavored beverage containing less than 2% juice extract, not carbonated.
|-
|{{w|Infant formula|Formula}}
|Typically refers to an artificial replacement for mother's milk. Not carbonated.
|-
|Medicine
|Only sometimes a drinkable liquid. Never or perhaps almost never carbonated. Alternatively, a common euphemism for alcohol, or some other drink that the person doesn't want to admit to drinking -- or at least doesn't want to share.
|-
|{{w|Broth}}
|Liquid in which bones, meat, fish, or vegetables have simmered. Often used as a soup base. Not carbonated.
|-
|Fool's Champagne
|Carbonated beverage is to champagne what fool's gold is to gold.
|-
|Sugar Milk
|This may be a reference to dairy, but in this region of the US people drink a popular carbonated beverage called {{w|Moxie}} that is less familiar to people elsewhere.
|-
|No word for them
|This region of the US does not have a word for carbonated beverages (according to Randall). Possibly they do not drink them at all.
|-
|Hydro
|A word for water. Carbonated water does exist, but this word means all forms of water. Since this area borders Canada, it may also be a reference to the common Canadian use of "Hydro" to mean electricity
|-
|Harvard Tea
|The region shaded this way includes {{w|Cambridge, Massachusetts}}, which is home to {{w|Harvard University}}.
|-
|{{w|Drinking fountain|Bubbler}}
|A nod to another popular map of the same type, exploring the regional dialects used to describe drinking fountains. Rhode Island and the eastern portion of Wisconsin are the only two locations where 'Bubbler' is commonly used to refer to drinking fountains, but the word is commonly used in surrounding areas to depict the strong variety of {{w|Rhoticity_in_English|rhoticity}} present, some saying 'bubblah' in for example Boston, and others saying 'water fountain'.
|-
|Mouthbuzz
|Perhaps referring to the feeling of drinking a carbonated drink, where the releasing carbonation almost 'buzzes' in the mouth.
|-
|Brad's Elixer
|Possibly a reference to "Brad's Drink", the original name for {{w|Pepsi}} when it was invented by Caleb Bradham in 1893. The word "elixir" is defined as "a sweetened liquid usually containing alcohol that is used in medication either for its medicinal ingredients or as a flavoring", but it is misspelled here as "elixer".
|-
|Hot Water
|Not carbonated. Not even in Jacuzzi and hot tubs.
|-
|Fluid
|A word that means nearly any liquid in existence. Not specific to carbonated beverages.
|-
|{{w|Coke Zero}}
|Name of a carbonated beverage.
|-
|Carbo
|Sodas sweetened with corn syrup or cane sugar are high in carbohydrates. Could also refer to carbonation.
|-
|Quicksilver
|An old term for the element mercury, a metallic liquid in its pure form at room temperature. Extremely harmful if swallowed.
|-
|Glug
|Onomatopoeia, referring to the sound of swallowing a large amount of liquid. Or possibly referring to {{w|Glögi|glögg}} (pronounced "glug"), a Swedish drink similar to mulled wine.
|-
|Water Plus
|Technically the name of {{w|Water Plus|a British water retail services provider}}, this likely refers to the prevalence of "plus" as a preposition in branding nomenclature (e.g.: {{w|Google+}}, {{w|iPhone 8 Plus}}, {{w|7 Up Plus}}, etc.). Also reminiscent of "Milk Plus," the drugged milk from the movie A Clockwork Orange.
|}

The title text may be a wry comment in light of the pocket of "soda" in the St. Louis, MO area.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[A map of the United States divided into purple, red, green, blue, and yellow colored regions.]

:[A purple area in North West Washington.]
:Fanta

:[A blue area spanning the Western border of Washington and Oregon.]
:Sode

:[A yellow area spanning the remainder of Washington, North Western Oregon, Northern Idaho and the North Western corner of Montana.]
:Ichor

:[A yellow area corresponding to Hawaii except for the island of O'ahu.]
:Pepsi

:[A red area corresponding to the Hawaiian island of O'ahu.]
:Crystal Pepsi

:[A green area spanning the North Eastern corner of Oregon, central Idaho and the majority of Montana.]
:Spicewater

:[A blue area spanning Eastern Montana, the North Eastern corner of Wyoming and the majority of North and South Dakota.]
:Refill

:[A red area spanning Eastern North and South Dakota, the majority of Minnesota, Northern Wisconsin and Michigan North of the lakes.]
:Mead

:[A green area spanning the border between Minnesota and Wisconsin.]
:Canadian Ale

:[A yellow area spanning the South Eastern corner of Minnesota, the North Eastern corner of Iowa and the majority of Wisconsin.]
:Aether

:[A green area in North East Wisconsin.]
:Mouthwater

:[A purple area covering most of Michigan south of the lakes.]
:Kid's coffee

:[A red area covering Northeast & central New York.]
:Hydro

:[A green area covering Vermont and spanning the border with New York.]
:[No word for them]

:[A yellow area covering Maine and the majority of New Hampshire.]
:Sugar milk

:[A red area spanning Eastern Massachusetts and the border with New Hampshire.]
:Harvard tea

:[A blue area covering Rhode Island and spanning Eastern Connecticut, central Massachusetts and the South West corner of New Hampshire.]
:Bubbler

:[A yellow area spanning the South Eastern corner of New York, the South Western corner of Massachusetts, Western Connecticut and Northern New Jersey.]
:Mouth Buzz

{{comic discussion}}

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2108: Carbonated Beverage Language Map