explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

2558: Rapid Test Results

2021-12-22T21:09:49Z

Username2: fixed hering illusion effect

{{comic
| number = 2558
| date = December 22, 2021
| title = Rapid Test Results
| image = rapid_test_results.png
| titletext = A solid red area with two white lines means that you have been infected with the anti-coronavirus, COVID+19, which will cure anyone you have close contact with.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|RAPIDLY created by a BOT with an old inconsistent cough, low temperature and an increased ability to taste food, that is NOT a reference to comic 2279- Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic is a joke about COVID-19 rapid lateral flow test results. These devices are used in many countries for individuals to test their own nasal and oropharynx fluid for evidence of covid-19 virus to detect assymptomatic infection. These tests have two indicator strips - a test line for covid-19 and a control line to check the device is working correctly. Where a control line is not present, the test should be ignored and repeated.

The first 2 answers are the standard indicators for a negative and positive result, but Randall takes this to absurdity{{citation needed}}.

{| class="wikitable"
!Result
!Explanation
|-
|Control line only
|Negative
As for all such actual tests, the procedure has been activated, but only the Control result is complete. Without this Control line (which ''always'' shows after proper use), a used tester with a negative Test result would be indistinguishable from one not actually tested with, giving doubt or misdirection about the result; and possibly inviting re-use, with dubious consequences.
|-
|Control and test line
|Positive
This clearly shows the (un)desired test result, whether that is for the likes of pregnancy (until comparatively recently the occasion most familar for requiring this form of test) or the indicators of a specific infection.
|-
|2 wavy lines resembling the {{w|Approximation#Typography|approximately equal}} sign
|Approximately positive
While it would be possible to make the test produce wavy line(s) by default, and some versions 'activate' more complex patterns such as tick-marks or wording, the waviness or other patternation would not normally be contingent upon the testing state it must reveal, and ambiguity of detection would most result in a fainter Test line (which perhaps should be taken as Positive until shown otherwise).
|-
|2 lines closer together than usual
|{{w|College ruled}} refers to how college ruled notebooks in the United States have narrower spacing between the lines.
Though, again, the test could be designed to reveal this pattern, there is no simple way to make this a result-indicator of any qualitative or quantitative result. It also remains more desirable to maintain an easily-identifiable separation between lines and not risk the Test and Control lines bleeding together into one.
|-
|Four lines at varying lengths
|Mimics the standard image for a strong mobile (or cellular in the United States) phone signal.
There are tests which give multiple 'indicator test strips' for progressively greater/lesser sensitivity, perhaps to identify concentrations, or other qualitative differences like a 'fingerprint' of multiple targetable reagents, but this is not at all useful for a solid Yes/No question such as the one this scenario is supposed to be for.
|-
|2 lines on a background of radiating lines
|The 6th "result" is a reference to an {{w|optical illusion}} called the {{w|Hering illusion}}, where two parallel lines appear to bend inward.
Whether the radial lines can (or should) be designed into the test has no bearing upon the core test, and probably should not confuse the identification of what are ''supposed'' to be one/two ''clear'' straight lines.
|-
|Multiple lines in the shape of a scary stick figure
|In the found-footage movie ''{{w|The Blair Witch Project}}'' stick figures shaped like this indicated that the Blair Witch was near.
The test probably{{fact}} does not have any useful method for revealing the proximity of witchcraft, unless testably indicated within the sample material itself.
|-
|Three lines
|The final one is a reference to {{w|Hamburger button|hamburger buttons}}, an icon that is widely used on websites to reveal a menu.
As a 'read-only' display of results, there is no potential for further interaction by tapping the indicator material, and this may even spoil the state of the proof it gives.
|}

The title text is likely a reference to {{w|antimatter}}, which in reality mutually annihilates when coming into contact with regular matter. Here Randall postulates that there must be an equivalent but opposite virus to Covid-19 which he names Covid+19; which annihilates covid-19.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
{{comic discussion}}
[[Category: COVID-19]]
[[Category: Comics with color]]
[[Category: Charts]]
[[Category: Fiction]]

2413: Pulsar Analogy

2021-01-23T15:09:59Z

Username2:

{{comic
| number = 2413
| date = January 18, 2021
| title = Pulsar Analogy
| image = pulsar_analogy.png
| titletext = The #2 cause of astronomer hand injuries is trying to do vector math when the second axis points off to the right.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by an INJURED ASTRONOMER - more on the injury part, to mind and hand both, in the explanation. The last frame is not fully explained. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{w|Pulsar}}s are a kind of old, shrunken, fast-spinning star. They are usually {{w|neutron stars}}. They no longer shine in all directions, but instead produce beams of radiation out their magnetic poles, which blip by us in rapid pulses as they spin.

Ponytail, an astronomer in this comic, explains a pulsar's fast rotation with an analogy about a tape measure retracting. The analogies that Ponytail picks are incredibly poor ones.

Since the analogy does result in something that spins, the reader might think that, while they don't immediately see how it helps in understanding pulsars, they're willing to reserve judgment to see what is then done with the analogy; Cueball's response may suggest this sort of wait-and-see attitude. However, the analogy is likely to be useless or misleading, as the tape measure starts to rotate because the retracting tape is not moving only in a radial (in/out) direction. As a star collapses into a pulsar over unimaginably many years, its natural rotation rate is imperceptibly and eventually greatly amplified by its shrinking moment of inertia.

Further elaborations of the analogy, rather than clarifying matters, are successively more surreal. More misleading than the tape-measure is the idea of a laser measure being "exactly" like the emissions of a pulsar, which, although both pulse (and both for the same reason of holding pulsed light representation on our timeline in view of our deities), are produced in entirely different ways and are at best simply helping the mind hold the concept.

When a tape measure retracts, the part of the tape outside the tape measure is not going directly towards the tape measure's center but rather towards a hole in the side. This means the tape possesses some angular momentum relative to the tape measure. In addition, when the tape measure retracts, the part of the tape inside the tape measure rotates around a spool (which pulls the part of the tape outside the tape measure inside), so it also has angular momentum relative to the tape measure. When the tape is completely retracted, the tape can no longer rotate relative to the tape measure. Because of the conservation of rotational momentum, the tape measure will no longer spin at this point.

While pulsars also rotate quickly due to the conservation of angular momentum, the exact {{w|Pulsar#Formation,_mechanism,_turn_off|mechanism}} is completely different. Pulsars are formed when stars collapse due to no longer performing enough fusion to produce enough heat and energy to cancel out gravity. This causes the star to contract, which causes its mass, on average, to be closer to its axis of rotation, which causes the rotational inertia (also called the moment of inertia) to decrease. If the star's angular velocity stayed constant, this would cause the angular momentum to decrease, so the star's angular velocity must increase in order to offset the decrease in rotational inertia, i.e. the star (which is now a pulsar) spins faster. This method requires an initial rotation, which comes from the star. (The star's rotation comes from the dynamics of the gas cloud which forms the solar system in the first place.)

Some tape measures have a built-in {{w|laser line level}} and others have a built-in {{w|laser rangefinder}}. Pulsars emit electromagnetic radiation out of their magnetic poles, which is similar to a laser, but unlike the laser of a tape measure, the pulsar beam is emitted through the axis of the magnetic field. The pulsing nature of a pulsar comes from when the axis of rotation is not precisely aligned with the axis of the magnetic field, and the location of the viewer as the beam sweeps by. In the tape measure analogy the beam is at a right angle to the axis of rotation, so as long as the viewing angle isn't parallel with the rotation axis, the viewer would see the laser increase and decrease periodically as it the rotating tape measure points towards or away from the viewer.

While pulsars do demonstrate incredible {{w|Quake_(natural_phenomenon)#Starquake|starquakes}} and rotational {{w|Glitch_(astronomy)|glitches}}, neutron degeneracy is part of the mechanisms in which they are originally formed.

The title text mentions the {{w|right-hand rule}} in three-dimensional space. In a typical 3D coordinate system the Y-axis will point counterclockwise to the X-axis when looking down from the positive Z-axis. In academia, students are often taught to remember a number of mathematical conventions by using their actual physical right and left hands to align the axes. When the axes are in a different order, the left hand can be used in stead of the right, but there are a number of common operations in engineering and physics that use the {{w|cross product}} in systems where the first axis might point in absolutely any direction relative to the viewer. Using the hand rules, the thumb is aimed along the first axis, the forefinger along the second, and the middle finger along the third -- all at ninety degrees. So, when the first axis points off to the right, the right wrist is torqued to its full extension to make the thumb point that way while the other two fingers don't. During exams students can be seen performing this feat. People who learn cross products early in their life may develop other approaches for remembering these things, that don't stretch the hands as much, but then adopt the common approach once taught it.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Ponytail are standing next to each other.]
:Cueball: Why do pulsars spin so ''fast?''
:Ponytail: Hmm, let me think of an analogy...

:[A tape measure is retracting above Ponytail's head. To the right of her head, a tape measure is spinning rapidly.]
:Retracting tape measure: ''zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz''
:Spinning tape measure: SNAP
:Ponytail: You know how when you retract a tape measure and let go, it leaves it spinning?
:Ponytail: It's like that.
:Cueball (off-panel): Oh, I see.

:[A tape measure with a laser instead of a measuring tape is spinning slowly.]
:Cueball (off-panel): And if the tape measure is the kind with a laser level, that's the beam of radiation?
:Ponytail (off-panel): Exactly!

:[Cueball and Ponytail are walking next to each other in silhouette.]
:Ponytail: And when the tape whips around and smacks your hand, that's the neutron degeneracy shockwave.
:Cueball: Sounds painful!
:Ponytail: Top cause of astronomer hand injuries.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]

2066: Ballot Selfies

2020-11-12T00:39:31Z

Username2: Added citation needed for voting booth mirror

{{comic
| number = 2066
| date = October 31, 2018
| title = Ballot Selfies
| image = ballot_selfies.png
| titletext = There were actually some good reasons for those laws, but IMO they now do more harm than good. Which raises a question: If there's a ballot measure to strike them down, how can I resist the urge to take a picture of my "yes" vote?
}}

==Explanation==

This comic was published six days prior to the {{w|United States elections, 2018|2018 United States general elections}}, also called {{w|United States midterm election|midterm elections}}, because they happen halfway between two presidential elections, two years before and after. At the time, the [[xkcd]] header still provided a link to [https://www.vote.org/ vote.org], a website that helps US citizens with essential voting issues, like how to register or how to find their polling locations. It is the first of three consecutive comics that deal with this election.

In the United States, "{{w|ballot selfie}}s" refers to the practice of taking a picture of oneself with a completed ballot. These have been illegal in many states, due to laws passed to prevent vote selling.

Without proof of how a vote was cast, if someone bribed (or even violently coerced) a voter to vote for candidate A, the voter could just vote 'B' and the coercer would be unable to tell whether they voted as instructed. This is at the heart of the concept of "a secret ballot". But if ballot-selfies or other proof-of-vote mechanisms are permitted then the evil-doer can demand verification that the voter did what they were coerced to do - and this jeopardizes the idea of a truly free and fair election.

However, the "secret ballot" principle is not universally valued nor enforced. Some voting machines produce a paper receipt showing the choices the voter made - and many jurisdictions permit use of a postal ballot - so there are plenty of other ways to circumvent the law in those places. So the ban on ballot selfies is harder to justify unless those other lines of coercion are also ruled out.

On the other hand, the desire to take and distribute ballot selfies often comes from an excitement in participating in the voting process and the desire to share that excitement in the hopes of encouraging others to vote, and anything that helps get more people to the polls is generally considered to be a good thing. In addition, the law is incredibly difficult to enforce -- there is little way to prevent somebody from photographing their ballot and privately showing this photo to somebody else -- and the practice of enforcing it (i.e. searching for possible photographic devices all together) would make the local government incredibly unpopular. Lastly, voters storing evidence of their votes could be useful to prevent voting fraud performed by the state.

This dual threat/benefit has led some states to explicitly legalize ballot selfies, other states to specifically disallow them and even levy steep financial penalties, while the rest are still debating or ignoring the issue[https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2016/10/25/13389980/ballot-selfie-legal-illegal].

As [[Ponytail]] is aware of this law, she believes she has identified a solution wherein she will make an {{w|oil painting}} of her voting rather than taking a {{w|photograph}}. A painting being more of an artistic endeavor that doesn't have to faithfully record all aspects of the image, it may well be valid both on grounds of {{w|freedom of speech}} as well as not being a verbatim record of her vote - thereby preserving the secrecy of the ballot. Of course, making a painting of her vote may lead to additional problems. If she intends to paint the portrait herself, of herself (i.e. a {{w|self-portrait}}) casting her vote, it would be very difficult and time consuming to attempt to do that, especially without a mirror, which she apparently doesn't have with her and which is generally not standard issue in voting booths[citation needed]. She could also try to recruit someone else to do the painting, not knowing the level of their artistic talent, however, usually only the person casting the vote is allowed in the booth, and they are expected to close the curtain or otherwise ensure no outside person, like the painter, can view the vote casting act.

While [[Hairbun]] and [[White Hat]] are simply standing in line, [[Megan]] can be seen using a mobile phone.

In many US states, changes to state law can be made through the {{w|Initiatives and referendums in the United States|initiative and referendum}} process, which can be initiated and pursued by any citizen.

The title text refers to the legality of taking a ballot selfie whilst voting against the law against ballot selfies.

==Transcript==
:[Megan, Ponytail, Cueball, White Hat, and Hairbun are standing in a line with Hairbun in front. All are facing forward to the right except Cueball, who is looking to his left at Ponytail. Megan holds a phone in her hand while Ponytail carries an easel under her left arm and a paintbrush in her right hand.]
:Ponytail: Ballot selfies are illegal in this state, so to immortalize my vote I'm doing an oil painting in the voting booth.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Politics]]
[[Category:Elections]]

2377: xkcd Phone 12

2020-10-27T14:45:36Z

Username2: suggested screaming feature for sustain pedal.

{{comic
| number = 2377
| date = October 26, 2020
| title = xkcd Phone 12
| image = xkcd_phone_12.png
| titletext = New phone OS features: Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid), dark mode (disables screen), screaming mode (self-explanatory), and coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it).
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a PERSON NAMED MAX. Closed timelike curves need more explanation. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This is the "12th" (actually the 8th) in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone]] series in which Randall explains his new joke phone designs with many strange and useless features. It is also a reference to the recently released {{w|iPhone 12}}. However, there have only been 8 comics released, with the previous two being [[2000: xkcd Phone 2000]] and [[1889: xkcd Phone 6]].

The note about the xkcd Phone 12 and the xkcd Phone 12 Max (only for people named Max) is a joke about the different models of iPhone 12: iPhone 12, iPhone 12 Mini, iPhone 12 Pro and iPhone 12 Pro Max. The xkcd Phone 12 Max would be expected to have a larger screen, but it seems that this phone is also only for people with the name Max. If the phones are respectively placed, Max's (Maxes'?) phone is the smaller of the two models.

The slogan '"The only phone you'll ever own"' has the "registered trademark" symbol, with that symbol supposedly itself trademarked, which is highly unlikely.

Multiple unusual and comedic features are labelled on the phone, detailed below:

* '''Full drivetrain warranty''' - A common warranty feature for automobiles--see {{w|drivetrain}}. As a side note, the phone here would be cheaping out on the warranty if it were a car; a "drivetrain" warranty covers everything ''except'' the engine; only if it was a "{{w|powertrain}}" warranty would it cover the engine. A phone typically has none of these things, although this one seemingly does.
* '''Coated for easy swallowing''' - A common feature on solid medicines meant to be taken orally. Phones do not belong in the set of edible objects, much less orally-taken medicines{{Citation needed}}. Since some parents of young children let them teethe on their phones, this would be an undesirable feature. There may be a pun here, based on the larger smartphones being practically the same as the more {{w|Tablet_computer|minimal portable computers}}.
* '''Surgical-grade apps''' - "Surgical-grade steel" is sometime used as a selling point indicating quality materials. This feature suggests that the apps themselves are made from high-quality material, although this is absurd because an app is (as the name suggests) a software application, not any physical object that could be reasonably defined as 'surgical-grade' or not.
* '''Built-in 600 lb magnet for magnet fishing''' - {{w|Magnet fishing}} is an activity for searching for objects that can be pulled in by a strong magnet. A 600 pound magnet can lift a 600 pound (272kg) object (at Earth's surface). This would tend to make the phone stick to any iron or steel objects (such as refrigerators) and be impossible to remove with human strength, and only the strongest humans could pick up the phone even if it were properly insulated. It would also be impossible to separate two phones without destroying one of them if the interlocking feature were used. This feature would also erase any credit cards the owner puts in the vicinity of the phone, meaning this phone could not be put in one's pocket with a wallet.
* '''Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque''' - This is a reference to {{w|ultrasonic toothbrush}}es. {{w|Oral-B}} does not produce any ultrasonic toothbrushes, but does produce ''{{w|sonic toothbrush}}es.'' There is a logical connection between electric toothbrushes and smartphones, namely they are both electronic and both vibrate; however, most phones cannot perform dentistry autonomously{{Citation needed}}.
* '''40 mL emergency water supply''' - 40 milliliters is equal to 40 cubic centimeters. For comparison, the iPhone 11 Pro Max's volume is just shy of 100 cubic centimeters; if the Phone 12 Max is similarly sized, then the water supply would take up over 40% of its total volume. In this day and age, many phones are water-resistant to some degree; nevertheless, shipping a phone with an interior consisting of a 3:2 ratio of electronics-to-water will surely lead to many short-circuited, inoperable phones. Furthermore, {{w|survival kit}}s often come with pouches that can hold several litres of water, in case of emergency. Because people typically take their phones with them everywhere they go, storing a survival kit inside the phone would be a life-saving feature. Unfortunately, 40cc of water is not enough to stave off thirst for a meaningful amount of time, extinguish a flame much larger than a candle's, or deal with most other situations which would constitute an emergency. Unless you are suitably proficient at {{w|Katara_(Avatar:_The_Last_Airbender)#Waterbending|waterbending}}, this feature is useless for its intended function.
* '''Security feature: unmarked side buttons''' - Some modern phones have unmarked side buttons, so the secureness of this feature is doubtful. This phone is likely to have trillions of buttons though, just to confuse the user. No buttons are visible which could indicate the side of the phone functions is touch sensitive and the buttons are not only unlabeled but not visible.
* '''3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches''' - {{w|Inductive charging|Induction charging}} is a method that a number of modern phones advertise, allowing power to (inefficiently but 'conveniently') transfer into a device from a mains charging station or another device's battery without the need for plugging in cables. It transfers energy between safely tuned coils, that do not touch, though typically the case of one device must remain placed directly upon the other for the optimal transfer of charge between them. {{w|Electrical_injury#Lethality|Shocks of 11,000 volts are usually lethal}}, so 3,000,000 volts of 'pure' electricity (possibly from a complete {{w|Tesla coil}} assemblage) is pretty much guaranteed to kill you. Worse still, it would render the phone unusable due to the high voltage emitted to any object or bodypart within its large range. The {{w|Electrical breakdown}} voltage of air is approximately 3 kV / mm, which would allow a 3 MV potential to jump a distance of 100 cm. 36 inches (91 cm), however, is within reach of a simple extension cord.
* '''99.9% BPA- and hands- free''' - {{w|Bisphenol A}} (or BPA) is a compound that is used in making plastics. BPA has been found to exhibit hormone-like properties, so there is a movement to produce BPA-free plastics using alternative bisphenols. {{w|Hands-free}} describes using the device "without hands", e.g. using voice commands. This is important when using a device while driving. These are 2 unrelated ideas, which use the suffix "free" in different meanings ("BPA-free" means "containing no BPA", while "hands-free" means "your hands are left free"). The construction "NOUN- and NOUN-ADJ" is normally only used with the meaning of "ADJ" repeated for both nouns, implying that this phone "contains no hands" (or possibly "your BPA is left free"). The "percentage free" description is also a standard form of advertising {{w|weasel word}}s. A food might be described as "90% fat-free" with the heavy implication that it has a tenth of the usual fat content, but likely really means "10% of the product is pure fat" (typically by weight or maybe pre-cooked volume) compared with perhaps 15% in the typical non-'fat-free' recipe. 0.1% of BPA is not an insignificant quantity given its possible effects, and is likely to be a higher leachable content if it is all concentrated in external trimmings. It is unclear what a tenth of a percent of a hand needs to do, to operate the device, but it does also mean that it is not as completely hands-free as implied. Or else it ''also'' implies a trace ingredient in the manufacturing process that should still concern you.
* '''Extended release charge cable''' - Electronics manufacturers support standards to reduce time to fully recharge, e.g. Qualcomm {{w|Quick Charge}} standard. This is a reference to "extended release" medication. It's unclear what purpose would be served by charging a phone slower than normal.
* '''Closed timelike curves''' - This label is applied to the curved corner of the phone. Randall may be making a visual joke by referring to the corner of the phone by a very complex relativistic concept. Given that {{w|Closed timelike curves}} are usually associated with solutions to general relativity that allow for time travel...
* '''Fits in standard shipping container''' - An {{w|intermodal shipping container}} is large enough to fit automobiles, raising the question of just how big this xkcd phone is.
* '''Interlocking, stackable''' - A quality of, among other things, LEGO bricks. Probably a bad idea to use this feature, given how close the phone is to critical mass.
* '''Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility''' - The {{w|Game Boy Printer}} was a thermal paper printer originally paired with the Game Boy Camera. This device was released in 1998 and discontinued in 2003, so this partnership would be obsolete.
* '''Sustain pedal''' - A {{w|sustain pedal}} is commonly associated with a digital keyboard or piano; it lets the note continue sounding when the key is released. It's unclear what purpose it would serve in a phone, although it might be used for the screaming mode in the title text.
* '''CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves''' - An allusion to the COVID-19 pandemic. "{{w|We Like to Party! (Vengaboys song)|We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)}}" is a 1998 Eurodance/techno hit by the Vengaboys, and is perhaps most familiar to Americans from a series of {{w|Six Flags}} ads.
* '''Sacrificial anode''' - Useful if something metal (like, say, a boat) will be in a wet environment for a long time. The {{w|sacrificial anode}} is made of a material with higher redox potential (typically zinc), and will corrode faster than the (more valuable) metal object it's attached to. It's unclear if the phone HAS a sacrificial anode or IS a sacrificial anode.
* '''Tactical helium reserve''' - Since 1925, the United States has had a {{w|National Helium Reserve|strategic helium reserve}}. Helium is very rare on earth and has important scientific and military uses, so it’s important to have a supply in case supplies disappear. But here we have a tactical helium reserve, which suggests it's smaller and focused on shorter-term goals. Compare {{w|strategic bombing}} focused on destroying entire cities or countries and {{w|tactical bombing}} aimed at destroying individual targets or military units. Helium also has the property of being lighter than air, so if this reserve is large enough, the phone could float away if let go. However, this is unlikely, as the phone boasts other, heavy components such as large magnets and a critical mass of fissile material.
* '''50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)''' - Indicates the phone contains fissile material. This "2x safety factor" means that if you put 2 phones next to each other, or put one phone next to a {{w|neutron reflector}}, you would have a {{w|criticality accident}}, which may explain why you would not own another phone after this one. A phone with this much fissile material would pose a radiation hazard. The "2x safety factor" claim may be related to physicist {{w|Richard Feynman|Richard Feynman's}} famous criticism of NASA in the {{w|Rogers Commission}} report on the space shuttle Challenger disaster. Feynman found that when he confronted NASA engineers with a part worn one third of the way through, which was not supposed to be worn through at all, the engineers claimed that this demonstrated a 3x safety factor rather than a failure of the part.
* '''Shake for factory reset''' - A {{w|factory reset}} is often possible on electronic devices, and is usually accomplished either by pressing a button that is often well-protected against accidental contact, for an extended period or closing an electrical bridge. This one works like an {{w|Etch A Sketch|Etch-a-Sketch}}, which would not be preferred, as [http://www.ahajokes.com/com045.html slight disturbances] could easily cause massive losses of data. This would not be possible to shake anyway, given the 600-pound magnet stuck inside, so it would probably have to be extremely sensitive, which is not in any way a plus.
* '''Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you'''. {{w|Norton (software)|Norton}} and {{w|MacAfee}} are competing software security companies. This "protection" combines the two of them and claims that Norton (the person) will defend you if MacAfee (the person) attacks you.

The title text mentions xkcd phone OS updates, including:
* '''Infinite customization (home screen icons no longer snap to grid)''' - Whether on-screen icons snap to a grid is a very minor aspect of customization. Not having it would be the ultimate bane of anyone with {{w|obsessive-compulsive disorder}}, as it would make it very difficult to get icons exactly lined up vertically and horizontally.
* '''Dark mode (disables screen)''' - Dark mode is a popular feature on websites/apps with light backgrounds like Twitter and Reddit, changing the background to a dark color to help late-night users sleep better. Disabling the screen would not be a pleasant surprise when a user goes to turn on beloved dark mode. May be impossible to turn off if the screen is no longer touch sensitive when darkened unless the unmarked buttons can be used to disable it. Also a possible reason to want to use the shake-activated factory reset.
* '''Screaming mode (self-explanatory)''' - The phone screams. Reference to the screaming-while-falling [[1363: xkcd Phone|xkcd Phone 1]].
* '''Coherent ultracapacitor-pumped emission (please let us know what this setting does; we've been afraid to try it)''' - This mysterious feature has a terrifying name, with even the developers refusing to test it out. This option would probably be very easy to accidentally tap, given the style of every xkcd Phone ever. Possibly activated with one of the unlabeled buttons making it even more dangerous. Coherent and Emission are associated with laser devices and the use of a laser could justify the helium reserve, and the Ultracapacitor implies a high energy throughput. Raises the question of who designs the phone if the people marketing it don't know what it does.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

* Full drivetrain warranty
* Coated for easy swallowing
* Surgical-grade apps
* Built-in 600 lb magnet for magnet fishing
* Oral-B partnership: hold phone against teeth to ultrasonically remove plaque
* 40 mL emergency water supply
* Security feature: unmarked side buttons
* 3,000,000-volt arc allows wireless charging from a range of up to 36 inches
* 99.9% BPA- and hands- free
* Extended release charge cable
* Closed timelike curves
* Fits in standard shipping container
* Interlocking, stackable
* Nintendo partnership: GameBoy Printer compatibility
* Sustain Pedal
* CDC partnership: when in an indoor space with too many people, phone begins playing "We Like To Party! (The Vengabus)" at slowly increasing volume until everyone leaves
* Sacrificial anode
* Tactical helium reserve
* 50% below critical mass (2x safety factor)
* Shake for factory reset
* Norton MacAfee protection: if you're ever attacked by John MacAfee, Peter Norton will come out of retirement to defend you

The xkcd Phone 12* and 12 Max**

<nowiki>*Standard</nowiki> **For people named Max

"The only phone you'll ever own"®™

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|xkcd Phones]]

1086: Eyelash Wish Log

2020-09-28T21:55:33Z

Username2: /* Explanation */ Changed February 8's wish because it appears linked to february 6's wish.

{{comic
| number = 1086
| date = July 25, 2012
| title = Eyelash Wish Log
| image = eyelash wish log.png
| titletext = Ooh, another one. Uh... the ability to alter any coefficients of friction at will during sporting events.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is based on a common {{w|superstition}} that when someone's {{w|eyelash}} falls out, that person can make a wish on it. This comic appears to be a page from the fictitious Wish Bureau in charge of granting said wishes. And of course the wisher is [[Black Hat]] and he has quite a few wishes, most of them based on the previous wish. A common trope in fiction is that wishing for more wishes is prohibited and for many of his wishes Black Hat attempts to circumvent that.

;January 9: That wishing on eyelashes worked
:-This wish is pointless. If wishing on eyelashes worked, then this would do absolutely nothing (because it already works) and if it didn't then nothing would happen because wishing on eyelashes wouldn't work.

;January 12: A pony
:-This wish functions as a test to see whether or not previous wish worked. It can be assumed that it did, as Black Hat then continued to make additional wishes. Wishing for a pony is a stereotypical wish made by very young girls; since Black Hat is an adult man (with a very dark sense of humor), the contrast is humorous. It could also be a reference to Mr. Krabs wishing for a pony (with saddlebags full of money) on the ''SpongeBob SquarePants'' episode "Christmas Who?".

;January 15: Unlimited wishes
:-This appears to have failed, due to the traditional ban on wishing for additional wishes in conventional folklore.

;January 19: Revocation of rules prohibiting unlimited wishes
:-An attempt to circumvent the ban in the previous wish by wishing the ban away.

;January 20: A finite but arbitrarily large number of wishes
:-Another attempt to circumvent the ban on unlimited wishes by asking for a number of wishes that is limited, but as large as he likes (and there are some very large finite numbers out there, such as {{w|Graham's number}}).

;January 28: The power to dictate the rules governing wishes
:-Yet another attempt to circumvent the ban on unlimited wishes.

;February 5: Unlimited eyelashes
:-This wish likely caused Black Hat to grow unlimited eyelashes, which could be quite inconvenient and painful. And, yes, one more attempt to circumvent the ban on unlimited wishes.

;February 6: That wish-granting entities be required to interpret wishes in accordance with the intent of the wisher
:-This wish is likely a response to the previous day's misguided wish. It's actually quite a common problem that people making wishes leave them open for misinterpretation.

;February 8: That wish-granting entities be incapable of impatience
:-An attempt to prevent whatever being is powerful enough to grant wishes from becoming angry with Black Hat while he gives very specific instructions so wish-granting entities cannot misinterpret what he said. (It would appear that the previous wish failed. )

;February 12 #1: Unlimited breadsticks
:-The first wish of this day seems to be a reference to the unlimited {{w|breadsticks}} offered at {{w|Olive Garden}}.

;February 12 #2: Veto power over others' wishes
:-A power that could be interesting to have. It also very much fits with Black Hat's character.

;February 19: Veto power over others' wishes and all {{w|United States Congress|congressional}} legislation
:-An improvement of the previous wish. This would be very interesting to have indeed, especially if you are Black Hat, because you could veto any federal law, a power normally entrusted only to the {{w|President of the United States}}.

;February 23: The power to override any veto
:-This wish would allow Black Hat to override vetoes which in addition to the previous wish would effectively make him control the US legislature and, to some extent, also all other governing bodies. (Notably the {{w|United Nations|UN}}, where the veto powers wielded by the five {{w|permanent members of the Security Council}} cannot be overridden and can have large impacts on global politics.) Note that it will not allow him to turn laws off (veto them) and on again (override the veto) at any moment, as once a bill becomes law it cannot be vetoed. Without the ability to propose legislation, Black Hat's powers are still limited. The wish may also refer back to the February 19 wish: by granting himself veto power over wishes, Black Hat just made vetoes more powerful than wishes; now he is trying to control other people's vetoes as well, lest they one-up him.

;February 27: The power to see where any {{w|URL shortener|shortened URL}} goes without clicking
:-This wish relates to a common practice especially in tweets or other short length media where full-length meaningful web addresses such as <tt>www.somewhere.com/articles/specificdate/title-of-the-page.html</tt> would not be feasible. So a more compressed but nonsensical string of seemingly random characters is used which links to a link of the full text address. This creates some problems for people who are security or privacy conscious and prefer to be informed beforehand where they will be traveling on the Internet. The use of shortened URLs is also central to many types of {{w|Rickrolling|trolls or practical jokes}} (see [https://bit.ly/IqT6zt <tt>bit.ly/IqT6zt</tt>] for an example), by directing someone to a different location than the link would initially suggest. Thus Black Hat might be wishing to be able to tell where the links go for the purpose of avoiding this sort of trolling.

;February 29: The power to control the direction news anchors are looking while they talk
:-This wish likely appeals to Black Hat's mischievous side, allowing him to cause news anchors to look at the wrong camera during live broadcast. Repeatedly switching to the incorrect camera would cause havoc in the studio. Additionally, Black Hat may also attempt to get a news anchor fired by having them stare where they should not such as a female anchor's breasts.

;March 7: The power to introduce arbitrary error into Nate Silver's predictions
:-A reference to {{w|Nate Silver}}, who is a former writer for {{w|Baseball Prospectus}} working on predicting baseball players' stats and now writes for ''{{w|Five Thirty Eight}}'' in which he predicts the outcome of elections based on polling data. Influencing Nate Silver's predictions would allow Black Hat to indirectly influence the result of elections, by adjusting the {{w|Overton window}} of which candidates and policies are considered to have "broad public support" or "electability" or the like. This would tighten the Black Hat's control of the US even more.

;March 15: A house of stairs
:-This wish refers to the {{w|lithograph}} ''{{w|House of Stairs}}'' by {{w|M. C. Escher}}, or perhaps another of his lithographs, ''{{w|Relativity (M. C. Escher)|Relativity}}''.

;March 23: A universe which is a replica of this one sans rules against meta-wishes
:-Another attempt to circumvent the rules against wishing for more wishes by creating a {{w|parallel universe}} without such rules.

;March 29: Free transportation to and from that universe
:-While the previous wish may have worked, Black Hat notes a problem with it: he is still in our universe with no way to get to his new one.

;April 2: A clear explanation of how wish rules are structured and enforced
:-It appears that one or both of the previous two wishes failed, so Black Hat tries to discover exactly what is offending the Bureau. Having clear rules and how they work helps anyone finding loopholes in them.

;April 7: The power to banish people into the TV show they are talking about
:-Black hat is obviously fed up of hearing people talking about certain TV shows, and would like to be able to banish them into the show, thus prevent him having to listen to those people. Depending on the show in question, it could be quite horrifying for the person getting banished.

;April 8: Zero wishes
:-An attempt to hack the wish-granting system by using a quite common vulnerability in input validation: an unexpected value. There may be multiple vectors this can work:
:* in many computer systems, 0 is reserved for unlimited or undefined
:* in Assembly languages, do-while loops are more efficient than while loops, but famously do not check their condition on the first iteration. This means that 0 is effectively 256 for 8 bit counters, 65536 for 16 bits, etc. If the wish granter wrote the wish laws in assembly and used this optimization, initializing the wish count to zero would give him a large number of wishes dependent on the size of the counter.
:* the number may be used as a divisor in some equation and this will make the system {{w|divide by zero}} and probably crash
:* there also may be an assertion like "<tt>number of wishes granted == 1</tt>" which would fail, again crashing the system
:* similarly, if viewed as a computer system, it is possible that the wish decrement (subtracting 1 from the number of remaining wishes) is performed ''after'' the wish is granted, thus resulting in either −1 wishes (another common placeholder for unlimited numbers), or an {{w|integer overflow}} if the wish counter is stored as an unsigned integer; the overflow can result in an exception, otherwise −1 becomes represented as one less than the size of the integer – basically, an extremely large number.
:However it seems the eyelash wish-granting system does proper input validation on zero because it did not crash or grant unlimited wishes
:-This wish may also be a reversal of the January 9 wish. Black Hat is attempting to win his game by introducing a {{w|logical contradiction}}: if he gets "zero wishes", this is one wish granted; however, if it is not granted, then, de facto, he will have been granted zero wishes. This is a common technique used in logical proofs to show that an earlier assumption does not hold (in this case, the possibility of eyelash wishing to work).

;April 15: Veto power over clocks
:-Midnight, April 15 is the deadline for filing income tax returns in the United States.
:-It may also be that Black Hat, now in control of all human legislation, is attempting to extend this to further control also rules of nature – in this case: time. The strange wording is likely to be due to Black Hat having consulted with the wish-hacking manual he acquired April 2.

;April 22: A Pokéball that works on strangers' pets
:-A reference to the {{w|Pokémon}} series of video games. A Pokéball can be thrown at a Pokémon (or in this case, a pet that the Pokéball thrower finds either annoying or cute) to capture it and achieve ownership of it. Unless cheats are used (and in {{w|Pokémon Colosseum}}, in which a criminal organisation uses illegally modified pokeballs), Pokéballs cannot be used on Pokémon owned by other people in the Pokémon games . Many players wish to obtain the often high-level Pokémon of NPCs, and Black Hat may also be interested in pranking other players by stealing their powerful Pokémon. This was later revealed to be one of Randall's wishes in the title text of [[1705: Pokémon Go]].

The title text, a wish to have control over coefficients of friction during sporting events, is yet another mischievous wish. The coefficients of friction, though usually not noticed as they are unchanging, are all-important when performing physical activities — imagine trying to play hockey on a field of sandpaper or sprinting over a sheet of ice. In addition to the difficulty going where you want or getting any balls that might be in play where you want them to go in a changing friction environment, angular momentum would also be very difficult to control.

Note that when Black Hat makes meta-wishes no follow-up wishes are logged. Since the meta-wishes failed, no valid eyelash wish condition existed and the illegal test wishes were not logged in the eyelash wish log.

==Transcript==
:{|
! align="left" colspan="2" |Eyelash Wish Log
|-style="color: gray;"
|
|align="right"|Wish bureau ID#:
|-
|
|align="right"|21118378
|-style="color: gray;"
|
|align="right"|Date range:
|-
|align="right"|Jan-Apr 2012
|-
|}
:[a picture of Black Hat is above text saying Wisher]
:{|
!align="left" width="50px"|Date
!align="left"|Wish
|-
|Jan 09
|That wishing on eyelashes worked
|-
|Jan 12
|A pony
|-
|Jan 15
|Unlimited wishes
|-
|Jan 19
|Revocation of rules prohibiting unlimited wishes
|-
|Jan 20
|A finite but arbitrarily large number of wishes
|-
|Jan 28
|The power to dictate the rules governing wishes
|-
|Feb 05
|Unlimited eyelashes
|-
|Feb 06
|That wish-granting entities be required to interpret wishes in accordance with the intent of the wisher
|-
|Feb 08
|That wish-granting entities be incapable of impatience
|-
|Feb 12
|Unlimited breadsticks
|-
|Feb 12
|Veto power over others' wishes
|-
|Feb 19
|Veto power over others' wishes and all congressional legislation
|-
|Feb 23
|The power to override any veto
|-
|Feb 27
|The power to see where any shortened URL goes without clicking
|-
|Feb 29
|The power to control the direction news anchors are looking while they talk
|-
|Mar 07
|The power to introduce arbitrary error into Nate Silver's predictions
|-
|Mar 15
|A house of stairs
|-
|Mar 23
|A universe which is a replica of this one sans rules against meta-wishes
|-
|Mar 29
|Free transportation to and from that universe
|-
|Apr 02
|A clear explanation of how wish rules are structured and enforced
|-
|Apr 07
|The power to banish people into the TV show they're talking about
|-
|Apr 08
|Zero wishes
|-
|Apr 15
|Veto power over clocks
|-
|Apr 22
|A Pokéball that works on strangers' pets
|}

{{Comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Nate Silver]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Time]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:News anchor]]
[[Category:Video games]]

Talk:669: Experiment

2020-07-27T00:40:39Z

Username2: added a comment

I'm a science grad student, so these kinds of comics in particular I'm having fun writing for... (now if only I were writing my dissertation instead...) [[User:Bplimley|Bplimley]] ([[User talk:Bplimley|talk]]) 10:18, 7 April 2013 (UTC)
:You're turning these out really quickly. This is good stuff! '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 10:19, 7 April 2013 (UTC)
One can throw something to change one's motion in a frictionless vacuum.[[User:Username2|Username2]] ([[User talk:Username2|talk]]) 00:40, 27 July 2020 (UTC)

1012: Wrong Superhero

2020-04-15T15:48:38Z

Username2: removed legion as legion describes thousands

{{comic
| number = 1012
| date = February 3, 2012
| title = Wrong Superhero
| image = wrong_superhero.png
| titletext = Hi! Someone call for me? I'm a superhero who specializes in the study of God's creation of Man in the Book of Genesi-- HOLY SHIT A GIANT BUG!
}}
==Explanation==
The super hero from just [[1010|two comics ago]], Etymology-Man, returns. And just like that comic, Etymology-Man is explaining the origination of words instead of actually helping. {{w|Etymology}} is the study of the history of words, their origins, and how their form and meaning have changed over time.

In this comic, a group of scientists are in a lab, fighting off a giant mantis and some smaller, but still larger than normal praying mantises. One [[Cueball]] is firing a gun and [[Ponytail]] is brandishing a baseball bat, while the giant mantis grabs one Cueball by the leg, dangling him upside down. Behind the table another Cueball is listening to Etymology Man speak. The joke here is that the scientists called the wrong hero for help. Who they want is Entomology-Man because they are fighting a giant praying mantis and an army of smaller praying mantises (which are nonetheless much larger than a typical praying mantis - compared to the size of the people in this comic the smaller mantises appear to be 8-12 inches long). {{w|Entomology}} is the study of insects. Instead of calling Entomology-Man, who could probably help fighting off the mantises, they have accidentally called Etymology-Man, due to the similarities in their names. Etymology-Man can only explain the origin of words, making him useless in this current situation.

In the title text, we find out the scientists accidentally call another superhero focused on the story of {{w|Adam and Eve}} in the Biblical book of Genesis. This is, probably and unfortunately, Adam-ology Man.

==Transcript==
:[A giant praying mantis attacks a team of scientists, along with its legion of smaller-but-still-unusually-large mantises. Two of the scientists fight back, with a gun and a baseball bat respectively, while a third is in the mantis' clutches, held aloft by his foot, his goggles falling off his face. Bullets whiz by the giant mantis' head, and a fourth scientist hides behind a desk, on which rests a microscope and an Erlenmeyer flask. A man in a cape approaches the hiding scientist.]
:Etymology-man: Ah, no—you wanted '''''ENTO'''''mology-Man, spelled with an "N". See, it's from the Greek ''entomon'', meaning "insect," which is itself the neuter form of ''entomos'', meaning "segmented" or...
:'''BLAM BLAM BLAM'''

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]