explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

3204: Dinosaurs And Non-Dinosaurs

2026-02-07T23:11:38Z

WingedCat: /* Creatures that don't seem like dinosaurs, but are */

{{comic
| number = 3204
| date = February 6, 2026
| title = Dinosaurs And Non-Dinosaurs
| image = dinosaurs_and_non_dinosaurs_2x.png
| imagesize = 370x283px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Staplers are actually in Pseudosuchia, making them more closely related to crocodiles than to dinosaurs.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|This page was created by a webserver that is often described as being a dinosaur, however it is definitely not. Don't remove this notice too soon.}}

This comic explores the seeming paradox that certain extinct prehistoric species which are popularly thought of as being "dinosaurs" are, from a strict taxonomic viewpoint, not. It also takes into account the fact that all bird species are descended from dinosaurs and thus - again, from a strict taxonomic viewpoint - are themselves dinosaurs as well (see [[1211: Birds and Dinosaurs]]). To illustrate this, [[Randall]] provides silhouettes of dinosaurs, of entities that are widely thought of as dinosaurs but are not, of entities that are ''not'' widely thought of as dinosaurs but ''are'' (i.e., birds), and, lastly, of entities that are neither dinosaurs nor thought of as dinosaurs (which is funny because it's so all-encompassing as to be practically meaningless, just like it would be if you replaced the word "dinosaurs" by any other plural noun, or adjective).

In reading order from upper left in each quadrant of the image:
* Silhouettes in "seem like dinosaurs / are dinosaurs": {{w|Stegosaurus}}, {{w|Triceratops}}, {{w|Tyrannosaurus}}, {{w|Diplodocus}} and {{w|Velociraptor}}
* Silhouettes in "seem like dinosaurs / are not dinosaurs": {{w|Mosasaur}}, {{w|Quetzalcoatlus}}, {{w|Pteranodon}}, {{w|Plesiosaur}} and {{w|Dimetrodon}}
* Silhouettes in "don't seem like dinosaurs / are dinosaurs": {{w|Penguin}}, {{w|Heron}}, {{w|Ostrich}}, {{w|Pigeon}} and may be a {{w|Falcon}} or {{w|Petrel}}
* Silhouettes in "don't seem like dinosaurs / are not dinosaurs": {{w|Squirrel}}, {{w|Stapler}}, {{w|Pineapple}}, {{w|Human}} (here depicted as [[Cueball]]) and {{w|Bicycle}}

The title text is a further joke about taxonomy, seemingly predicated on the assumption that staplers are biological organisms, and can thus be sorted into taxa. ''{{w|Pseudosuchia}}'' is in fact the clade that encompasses all crocodilians, and staplers bear a certain resemblance to the open mouth of a crocodilian. Also, "suchia" sounds a little like "sutures," and in some sense staples are pseudo sutures.

The original {{w|Linnaean taxonomy}} ''did'' at first have a top-level classification for "mineral" taxonomy, in addition to those for animal and plant, which {{w|Twenty questions#Popular variants|in its broadest sense}} might allow one to assign a stapler a taxonomic relationship with dinosaurs.

=== Creatures that seem like dinosaurs and are dinosaurs ===
* Stegosaurus
* Triceratops
* Tyrannosaurus Rex, whose name literally translates to ''Tyrant Lizard King'', was a Late Cretaceous dinosaur, living during the Maastrichtian Age at the very end of the period. It was a contemporary of Triceratops and Mosasaurs, also listed in this comic. T-Rex is arguably one of the most well-known dinosaurs, due to the recovery of intact skeletons, as well as successful marketing and pop-culture influences, such as ''Jurassic Park'', a movie of which Randall is a known fan.
* Diplodocus
* Velociraptor

=== Creatures that seem like dinosaurs, but are not ===
Dinosaur is a paleonotology term which refers to a specific group of reptiles, based upon evolutionary lines, bone structure and living domain. However, it is also a popular science/cultural term which refers to extinct large reptiles, hence the confusion between what is scientifically included and what is culturally assumed to be included. While dinosaurs and pterosaurs had a common ancestor, the archosaur, they diverged around 250 MYA, and are distinct enough to be entirely separate lineages.

The creatures listed are:
* A mosasaur is an extinct aquatic reptile, looking similar to a dolphin, that existed at the same time as the dinosaurs. Whilst it appeared in {{w|Jurassic World}}, momasaurs had a different ancestor than dinosaurs
* Plesiosaurs
* Pterodons are flying reptiles
* Dimetrodon
* Quetzalcoatlus was a genus of flying pterosaurs, related to pterodons, that lived in the Maastrichtian Age alongside Mosasaurs, T-Rex, and many others. They were some of the largest flying animals in history, with wingspans up to 36 feet (11m). They were not, however, dinosaurs, as they had pterosaur ancestry.

=== Creatures that don't seem like dinosaurs, but are ===
Strictly speaking, birds are descended from dinosaurs, but that still places them in the evolutionary line, which is close enough for the comic's purposes.
* Penguin
* Heron
* Ostrich
* Pigeon
* Falcon or Petrel (both of them qualify)

=== Creatures that don't seem like dinosaurs, and are not ===
* Squirrel: mammal
* Stapler: not a living thing
* Pineapple: plant
* Human: mammal
* Bicycle: not a living thing

==Transcript==
:[A 2x2 chart where each of the four quadrants contains five silhouettes. These depict various animals, a few objects, and a human. Above each column and to the left of each row there are a label:]
:[Left column:] Are dinosaurs
:[Right column:] Are not dinosaurs
:[Upper row:] Seem like dinosaurs
:[Lower row:] Don't seem like dinosaurs

:[Here follows a list of what are in each of the four quadrants:]

:[Top left (seem like dinosaurs, are dinosaurs):]
:[Stegosaurus, triceratops, tyrannosaurus, diplodocus, and velociraptor.]

:[Top right (seem like dinosaurs, are not dinosaurs):]
:[Mosasaur, quetzalcoatlus, dimetrodon, plesiosaur, and pteranodon.]

:[Bottom left (don't seem like dinosaurs, are dinosaurs):]
:[Penguin, egret, falcon, pigeon, and ostrich.]

:[Bottom right (don't seem like dinosaurs, are not dinosaurs):]
:[Squirrel, stapler, bicycle, human (here depicted as Cueball), and pineapple.]

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Biology]]
[[Category:Dinosaurs]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Squirrels]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

3204: Dinosaurs And Non-Dinosaurs

2026-02-07T23:11:13Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 3204
| date = February 6, 2026
| title = Dinosaurs And Non-Dinosaurs
| image = dinosaurs_and_non_dinosaurs_2x.png
| imagesize = 370x283px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Staplers are actually in Pseudosuchia, making them more closely related to crocodiles than to dinosaurs.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|This page was created by a webserver that is often described as being a dinosaur, however it is definitely not. Don't remove this notice too soon.}}

This comic explores the seeming paradox that certain extinct prehistoric species which are popularly thought of as being "dinosaurs" are, from a strict taxonomic viewpoint, not. It also takes into account the fact that all bird species are descended from dinosaurs and thus - again, from a strict taxonomic viewpoint - are themselves dinosaurs as well (see [[1211: Birds and Dinosaurs]]). To illustrate this, [[Randall]] provides silhouettes of dinosaurs, of entities that are widely thought of as dinosaurs but are not, of entities that are ''not'' widely thought of as dinosaurs but ''are'' (i.e., birds), and, lastly, of entities that are neither dinosaurs nor thought of as dinosaurs (which is funny because it's so all-encompassing as to be practically meaningless, just like it would be if you replaced the word "dinosaurs" by any other plural noun, or adjective).

In reading order from upper left in each quadrant of the image:
* Silhouettes in "seem like dinosaurs / are dinosaurs": {{w|Stegosaurus}}, {{w|Triceratops}}, {{w|Tyrannosaurus}}, {{w|Diplodocus}} and {{w|Velociraptor}}
* Silhouettes in "seem like dinosaurs / are not dinosaurs": {{w|Mosasaur}}, {{w|Quetzalcoatlus}}, {{w|Pteranodon}}, {{w|Plesiosaur}} and {{w|Dimetrodon}}
* Silhouettes in "don't seem like dinosaurs / are dinosaurs": {{w|Penguin}}, {{w|Heron}}, {{w|Ostrich}}, {{w|Pigeon}} and may be a {{w|Falcon}} or {{w|Petrel}}
* Silhouettes in "don't seem like dinosaurs / are not dinosaurs": {{w|Squirrel}}, {{w|Stapler}}, {{w|Pineapple}}, {{w|Human}} (here depicted as [[Cueball]]) and {{w|Bicycle}}

The title text is a further joke about taxonomy, seemingly predicated on the assumption that staplers are biological organisms, and can thus be sorted into taxa. ''{{w|Pseudosuchia}}'' is in fact the clade that encompasses all crocodilians, and staplers bear a certain resemblance to the open mouth of a crocodilian. Also, "suchia" sounds a little like "sutures," and in some sense staples are pseudo sutures.

The original {{w|Linnaean taxonomy}} ''did'' at first have a top-level classification for "mineral" taxonomy, in addition to those for animal and plant, which {{w|Twenty questions#Popular variants|in its broadest sense}} might allow one to assign a stapler a taxonomic relationship with dinosaurs.

=== Creatures that seem like dinosaurs and are dinosaurs ===
* Stegosaurus
* Triceratops
* Tyrannosaurus Rex, whose name literally translates to ''Tyrant Lizard King'', was a Late Cretaceous dinosaur, living during the Maastrichtian Age at the very end of the period. It was a contemporary of Triceratops and Mosasaurs, also listed in this comic. T-Rex is arguably one of the most well-known dinosaurs, due to the recovery of intact skeletons, as well as successful marketing and pop-culture influences, such as ''Jurassic Park'', a movie of which Randall is a known fan.
* Diplodocus
* Velociraptor

=== Creatures that seem like dinosaurs, but are not ===
Dinosaur is a paleonotology term which refers to a specific group of reptiles, based upon evolutionary lines, bone structure and living domain. However, it is also a popular science/cultural term which refers to extinct large reptiles, hence the confusion between what is scientifically included and what is culturally assumed to be included. While dinosaurs and pterosaurs had a common ancestor, the archosaur, they diverged around 250 MYA, and are distinct enough to be entirely separate lineages.

The creatures listed are:
* A mosasaur is an extinct aquatic reptile, looking similar to a dolphin, that existed at the same time as the dinosaurs. Whilst it appeared in {{w|Jurassic World}}, momasaurs had a different ancestor than dinosaurs
* Plesiosaurs
* Pterodons are flying reptiles
* Dimetrodon
* Quetzalcoatlus was a genus of flying pterosaurs, related to pterodons, that lived in the Maastrichtian Age alongside Mosasaurs, T-Rex, and many others. They were some of the largest flying animals in history, with wingspans up to 36 feet (11m). They were not, however, dinosaurs, as they had pterosaur ancestry.

=== Creatures that don't seem like dinosaurs, but are ===
Strictly speaking, these birds are descended from dinosaurs, but that still places them in the evolutionary line, which is close enough for the comic's purposes.
* Penguin
* Heron
* Ostrich
* Pigeon
* Falcon or Petrel (both of them qualify)

=== Creatures that don't seem like dinosaurs, and are not ===
* Squirrel: mammal
* Stapler: not a living thing
* Pineapple: plant
* Human: mammal
* Bicycle: not a living thing

==Transcript==
:[A 2x2 chart where each of the four quadrants contains five silhouettes. These depict various animals, a few objects, and a human. Above each column and to the left of each row there are a label:]
:[Left column:] Are dinosaurs
:[Right column:] Are not dinosaurs
:[Upper row:] Seem like dinosaurs
:[Lower row:] Don't seem like dinosaurs

:[Here follows a list of what are in each of the four quadrants:]

:[Top left (seem like dinosaurs, are dinosaurs):]
:[Stegosaurus, triceratops, tyrannosaurus, diplodocus, and velociraptor.]

:[Top right (seem like dinosaurs, are not dinosaurs):]
:[Mosasaur, quetzalcoatlus, dimetrodon, plesiosaur, and pteranodon.]

:[Bottom left (don't seem like dinosaurs, are dinosaurs):]
:[Penguin, egret, falcon, pigeon, and ostrich.]

:[Bottom right (don't seem like dinosaurs, are not dinosaurs):]
:[Squirrel, stapler, bicycle, human (here depicted as Cueball), and pineapple.]

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Biology]]
[[Category:Dinosaurs]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Squirrels]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

3195: International Station

2026-01-17T14:28:45Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 3195
| date = January 16, 2026
| title = International Station
| image = international_station_2x.png
| imagesize = 265x250px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Welcome to the International Space Station Exclamation Point!
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|This page was created by a BOT APOSTROPHE S SPACE TRANSLATION SPACE ERROR PERIOD. Don't remove this notice too soon.}}
This joke makes fun of the parity between 'space', as in the invisible character between words, and 'space', as in the void between astronomical bodies. In this case, it is said that the word 'space' was never meant to be part of the name of the name, but was included as a word due to a transcription error.

The presumption is therefore that someone thought it necessary to say the name as "International (space) Station," perhaps to quash any misconception that the intended name might be "InternationalStation" (however capitalised). Someone else would have written this down as International Space Station, with the accidental name being accepted due to resulting name being acceptably apt or inconvenient to change.

The title text furthers the joke by transcribing the exclamation mark at the end of the phrase, similar to [[3143: Question Mark]]. There were also multiple examples of strings, with punctuation (literal and otherwise) and spelling easy to misconvey in [[1963: Namespace Land Rush]], though none of them used either spaces or "space"s. The full name of "International Space Station Exclamation Point" may also sound like it refers to a location in the International Space Station by the name of "Exclamation Point". In a similar vein, when customers order signboards, they sometime come with unintended quotation marks. The customer writes the signage text with quotation marks, with the expectation that the signmaker will ignore them.

The ISS made the news on 15 January 2026, the day prior to the release of this comic, due to the {{w|List_of_accidents_and_incidents_involving_the_International_Space_Station#2026|unprecedented evacuation of some crewmembers to Earth for medical reasons}}.

While the ISS had other names during its design, such as Space Station Freedom or Alpha, it does not appear that NASA or Roscosmos literally originally referred to it as just International Station. The Russian name for it is "Международная Kосмическая Cтанция" (MKC) or "Mezhdunaródnaya Kosmícheskaya Stántsiya", which translates as "International Space Station" using the cosmic, non-punctuation meaning of "space".

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Don't remove this notice too soon.}}

:[Ponytail is talking to Cueball. They seem to be floating in space, surrounded by a wrench, a book, two sheets of paper and some debris.]
:Ponytail: You know, NASA and Roscosmos actually originally named it the '''''International Station''''', but a translation issue led someone to accidentally transcribe the formatting.

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Space]]
[[Category:Language]]

3082: Chess Position

2025-05-11T20:18:20Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 3082
| date = April 28, 2025
| title = Chess Position
| image = chess position 2x.png
| imagesize = 740x598px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = It's important to learn the moves that take you into the vortex, but it's best not to study vortex itself too closely. Even grandmasters who have built up a tolerance lose the ability to play for a few hours after studying it.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|The various paragraphs are not organised. Also, might need to reduce the focus on describing the scene and focus more on explaining the jokes.}}

[[Cueball]] talks to [[Ponytail]] about a chess game he had last week against [[Knit Cap]]. After Cueball made a {{w|blunder (chess)|blunder}}, a critically bad mistake which frequently changes the course of the game, both of them quickly made inaccurate moves, probably rated as a "{{w|Blunder (chess)|blunder}}", "mistake", or "miss", leading to an odd configuration of the chess pieces. Blunders that are not taken advantage of can lead to this effect for less experienced players.

The rest of this comic becomes absurd, as Cueball then describes himself and Knit Cap descending into a fantasy world "on a deep branch of the game tree." However, it seems that Cueball and Knit Cap each made a sequence of seemingly obvious blunders that neither opponent then took advantage of, reaching a board configuration that Cueball had never even anticipated happening. Ponytail reacts nonchalantly to this story, as she says this is a common scenario for new players, and that there is even a defined name for it: the Kasparov Vortex Gambit. Ponytail's advice to Cueball after he "recovers" from the disillusionment of the "vortex" is that she can teach him how to defend against the attack, by using the f pawn.

Chess strategy is commonly described in terms of following a {{w|decision tree}} or {{w|game tree}}, as one usually needs to calculate multiple moves ahead when planning out what move to play. As a chess game progresses, the {{w|phase space}} of possible positions increases wildly, though this will include many more configurations than are typically seen or anticipated by players. Rarely, an expert player may 'discover' a truly clever {{w|Glossary of chess#theoretical novelty|novel opening}}, but centuries of recorded gameplay has explored many of the possible moves, both good and not so good, that are often recognized by experienced students of the game as common stepping-stones on the way to possible victory (or frequent traps that send the unwary down the road to defeat). Both precise game-board states and more general variations may be easily recognized by an experienced player, and even be {{w|Checkmate pattern|given a name}} by the player community as a whole.

In some apparently mystical (or at least psychological) manner, by travelling such an unlikely and unfamiliar branch of the player/board game-space, the precise positioning of pieces combined with the state of mind that Cueball had developed created the impression of literally entering a mythical garden, with time even stopping. This could be a reference to the story "The door behind the wall" by HG Wells in which the protagonist explains to the personal that he is haunted by trying to find a door leading to a mystical garden, which he had stumbled across before. In chess, you want pieces to be in a position to attack other pieces, while at the same time being protected by other pieces. Typically you'd have some pieces on the offense, some playing defense, and some doing both. It seems that in this board configuration, somehow all the pieces ended up in both offensive attack positions able to attack every other piece on the board while at the same time each one was being protected by against attack by their other pieces. It was this perfect balance of position and protection that led to the time distortion and the magical garden.

This is impossible under standard rules. If all of the pieces are being attacked, that includes the king. It is illegal to end your turn with your king under attack; if you have no way to do so, the game ends, in checkmate if your king started the turn under attack or in stalemate if it did not. This may be a variant where this rule is suspended and the objective is to actually capture the king; if so, whoever's turn it was had an easy win (since the other king was under attack, take it and end the game), but given the number of blunders made, neither player may have realized it at the time. Alternatively, Cueball might not be including the king in "every piece".

{{w|Garry Kasparov}} is a Russian chess grandmaster and former world champion. He was the number-one rated chess player from 1984 to 2005, and is considered one of the greatest chess players of all past time, if not ''the'' greatest. A {{w|gambit (chess)|gambit}} refers to a chess opening in which a player sacrifices material with the aim of achieving a subsequent positional advantage. This name seems to indicate that Kasparov himself either discovered/’invented’ or made popular this "gambit" to suck new players into a "vortex" and trap them from getting out. This is not the case, but, within the xkcd universe, he has performed an equally absurd gambit (also named after himself) in [[2936: Exponential Growth]].

The f pawn is the pawn that begins on the f file (the 6th column of the chessboard from white's perspective, which is designated with the 6th letter of the alphabet since rows are designated by numbers). The pawn would start either on f2 (sixth column, second row) for the white player or f7 (sixth column, seventh row) for black. The fact that an apparent distortion in the fabric of space can be countered with ''a single pawn'' just adds to the absurdity of the situation. Equally absurd is the fact that moving the f pawn early in the game is itself usually a blunder that exposes the king to a diagonal attack, due to its starting position relative to the starting position of the king; perhaps the intent is to purposefully "blunder" down a ''different'' (non-vortexed) branch of the game-tree with resulting board positions that are far less mesmerising (at least to Cueball).

In the title text, Ponytail continues with her advice, telling Cueball that he needs to understand how the vortex can be entered, but not to study the actual vortex. It appears that if you spend too much time focusing on the vortex you will [[356: Nerd Sniping|lose your ability]] to play chess. Even experienced players, such as grandmasters who have built up some kind of tolerance against the effect of the vortex, lose their chess abilities for a few hours after studying it. Thus being able to get your opponent into the vortex, without getting caught in it yourself, should win you the game, since they would lose their ability to play chess.

==Transcript==
:[In the first panel, Cueball is walking in from the left, while talking to Ponytail.]
:Cueball: Something odd happened to me last week in a game at the chess club.

:[Cueball is playing a game of chess against Knit Cap.]
:[Caption above frame:]
:I moved, then instantly realized I'd blundered. But my opponent didn't notice and made a weird move.
:I got rattled and moved almost randomly, then I think we both panicked and made a couple of nonsensical moves, rapid-fire.

:[Zoomed in on Cueball, with three question marks above his head]
:I don't know how it happened, but suddenly I realized I was staring at an indescribably strange board position.

:[Cueball is talking to Ponytail.]
:Cueball: I've never seen anything like it. It seemed like every move attacked every piece, yet every piece was also protected. Pieces refracted through crystalline pawn structures.
:Cueball: The game clock slowed and then stopped.

:[Cueball and Knit Cap are floating in a complex five-fold symmetrical plant-like pattern of "game tree branches".]
:[Caption above the frame]
:It didn't even feel like we were playing chess. We had stumbled into a magical garden tucked away on a deep branch of the game tree.

:[Cueball is talking to Ponytail.]
:Cueball: I don't remember how the game ended, if it did.
:Cueball: I don't remember how I got home.
:Cueball: It's all a blur.

:[Close-up of Cueball's head.]
:Cueball: I've spent all week trying to reconstruct the position and can't.
:Cueball: It's consuming me.
:Cueball: I don't want to play chess. I just want to return to that garden.
:Cueball: Does... any of this make sense to you?

:[Cueball is standing with hands on face surprised as Ponytail talks with him.]
:Ponytail: Yeah, that's the Kasparov Vortex Gambit. Common trap for new players.
:Cueball: ''What?!''
:Ponytail: Once you recover I'll show you how to block it with the f pawn.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Knit Cap]]
[[Category:Chess]]

3029: Sun Avoidance

2024-12-27T20:30:41Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 3029
| date = December 25, 2024
| title = Sun Avoidance
| image = sun_avoidance_2x.png
| imagesize = 311x403px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = C'mon, ESA Solar Orbiter team, just give the Parker probe a LITTLE nudge at aphelion. Crash it into the sun. Fulfill the dream of Icarus. It is your destiny.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a SANTA BOT FLYING TOO CLOSE TO THE SUN (SKILL ISSUE). Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
The comic humorously ranks space missions based on their ability to "avoid" the Sun, presenting it as a "Sun Avoidance Skill Leaderboard." Most space missions remain relatively far from the Sun, with distances in the tens of millions of kilometers. However, the {{w|Parker Solar Probe}} is listed at the bottom of the leaderboard because it has come significantly closer to the Sun than any other spacecraft, at just 6.17 million kilometers. The joke lies in framing this incredible scientific achievement as a "failure" in avoiding the Sun.

The missions listed include notable solar and planetary exploration spacecraft like {{w|Mariner 10}}, {{w|Helios 1}}, {{w|BepiColombo}}, {{w|MESSENGER}}, and {{w|Solar Orbiter}}. These missions, designed to study the Sun or its surroundings, are ranked by their closest approaches to the Sun. The comic highlights the vast difference between the Parker Solar Probe and all other missions, emphasizing its unprecedented proximity to the Sun as part of its mission to study the solar corona and solar wind.

The inclusion of "All Other Expeditions in Human History" at the top of the leaderboard adds to the humor by lumping together all non-Sun-focused missions, which obviously maintain much greater distances from the Sun. The comic concludes with a sarcastic congratulation to the Parker Solar Probe for its "worst job avoiding the Sun," humorously subverting the intention and achievement of the mission.

The title text further expands on the joke by mockingly framing the Parker Solar Probe's proximity to the Sun as a skill-based failure. It suggests that its operators have demonstrated the "worst Sun avoidance skill" ever. This playful jab contrasts with the reality that the Parker Solar Probe's engineers and scientists intentionally designed the spacecraft to approach the Sun closer than ever before, enduring extreme heat and radiation to gather groundbreaking scientific data.

The caption text references the Greek legend of {{w|Icarus}}, whose father crafted artificial wings so the two of them could fly out of the open-topped prison they were in. Icarus, despite his father's warnings, flew too high which, according to the myth, got him appreciably closer to the Sun where it was much hotter, hot enough to destroy Icarus's wings, which caused him to plummet from a very high altitude to his death. (As humanity has learned since then, the upper reaches of Earth's atmosphere are cold, not hot, and the distance from Earth's surface to the upper reaches of its atmosphere is only a tiny fraction of the total distance from the Earth to the Sun.) The caption text urges the operators of another satellite to use their satellite to alter the Parker Solar Probe's orbit to send it into the Sun, which would by definition lower the Parker Solar Probe's distance from the Sun to zero. Unfortunately, the Parker Solar Probe was only designed to get close to the Sun, not into it, and would be destroyed soon after entering the Sun if not before. Being destroyed would prevent the Parker Solar Probe from transmitting any further data, terminating its mission. Its operators would probably object to this.{{cn}}

==Transcript==
:[A table is shown with three columns, all with underlined headers. Above these there is a header for the entire table.]
:Sun Avoidance Skill Leaderboard
:Rank Mission Sun Nearest Miss

:[The top of the table is not filled out regularly. It starts with giving the first number in the first column. But then instead of text in the next two columns there is a pair of large square brackets that covers about four lines with text in between that do not align with the table lines. In the first column beneath the first number along the bracket to the right there are three vertical, three horizontal and three vertical ellipses to indicate that the large bracket covers more than just the 4 first lines. At the bottom of the bracket the first visible digit of a larger number is shown. It is clearly cut of so the first number is partly outside the left frame edge. After the bracket ends, the next seven lines are normal tekst in all three columns. The numbers continues to increase from the first at the bottom of the bracket, but as for that number the first columns number is always cut partly off across the first visible digit to the left. The first digit can be read though, and in one of the middle lines, one more significant digit is partly visible at the front of the number due to non-proportional spacing, this new number itself being cut off instead of the now fully visible digit partly visible in the other rows]
:1.
:⋮
:…     [All other expeditions in human history]
:⋮
:4303857.
:4303858.    Mariner-10    69.0 million km
:4303859.    Helios 1    46.4 million km
:4303860.    BepiColombo    45.8 million km
:24303861.  Messenger    45.3 million km
:4303862.    Solar Orbiter    43.8 million km
:4303863.    Helios 2    43.3 million km
:4303864.    Parker    6.17 million km

:[Caption below the panel:]
:Congratulations to the Parker Solar Probe for setting a new record for "Worst Job Avoiding the Sun."

==Trivia==
*This comic was released on Christmas Day of 2024, but makes no reference to Christmas.
**This year marks the first time in xkcd's 20 year history (of releasing comics around Christmas), that there have been no [[:Category:Christmas|Christmas comics]] released during those days.
**Also all nine times before this year, when a release day fell on Christmas Day, that comic has always been about Christmas.
*If [[Randall]] found the accomplishments of the Parker Solar Probe more interesting than Christmas itself that might explain why this comic was released on Christmas Day instead.
**It is not the first space exploration accomplishment mentioned during Christmas, however, in the previous case [[2559: December 25th Launch]] from 2021, the comic was give seasonal spin. 

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Space probes]]

2950: Situation

2024-06-25T17:51:11Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2950
| date = June 24, 2024
| title = Situation
| image = situation_2x.png
| imagesize = 578x306px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = We're right under the flight path for the scheduled orbital launch, but don't worry--it's too cold out for the rockets to operate safely, so I'm sure they'll postpone.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a Shark, the iceberg of the sea - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic depicts a situation involving multiple pieces of infrastructure: a ship, sailing towards icebergs, which is tethered to an airship flying next to a power plant towards a bridge. Each of these are labelled with details that clearly reference famous disasters, all of which were caused (at least in part) by design failures. All of these incidents are common case studies for engineers studying how things can go very wrong. The implication is that, by putting them all together, most engineers would be highly concerned with the potential for catastrophe.

;"Unsinkable Ocean Liner" refers to the RMS ''{{w|Titanic}}''.
:The ''Titanic'' was a British ocean liner which famously {{w|Sinking of the Titanic|sank}} on its maiden voyage in 1912. It was the largest ship in operation at the time, and was called "unsinkable" due to its size and much-lauded design features. The ship struck an iceberg on the fourth day of its first voyage, breaching the hull and ultimately causing it to sink, resulting in 1,496 deaths. Multiple design inadequacies (although none without precedent in contemporary vessels) were afterwards identified as contributing to the rapid speed of the ship sinking and to the high loss of life. These included: too few life boats; inadequate steering ability; compartments lacking watertight ceilings and therefore allowing the water levels within to top over into previously unaffected sections.

;"Hydrogen-filled [...] Airship [...]" refers to the {{w|Hindenburg Disaster}}.
:The {{w|LZ 129 Hindenburg|''Hindenburg''}} was a German airship which used hydrogen as a lifting gas. In 1937, during a landing in New Jersey, the ship caught fire and the inflammable hydrogen quickly ignited, causing the ship to crash and resulting in 36 deaths. While the origins of the fire are still debated, the dangers of using large amounts of inflammable gas in airships were made dramatically clear.
:Ironically, the airship in the comic appears to have been commissioned for the purpose of mitigating iceberg risks (unless 'iceberg spotting' is for the purpose of steering the 'Unsinkable Ocean Liner' towards icebergs, perhaps as a tourist attraction).

;"Soviet Era Nuclear Reactor Undergoing a Turbine Test" refers to the {{w|Chernobyl Disaster}}.
:The {{w|Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant}} is located near the city of Pripyat, in Ukraine (part of the Soviet Union at the time of the disaster). On 26 April 1986, a reactor core partially melted during a turbine test. This led to an explosion, causing a massive release of radiation. This incident remains the worst nuclear accident to date. The cause of the disaster was determined to have resulted from a combination of uncommon circumstances and human error, which the reactor wasn't designed to account for.
:The number of fatalities from the disaster is difficult to calculate; two people died from the initial damage, twenty-eight more from acute radiation sickness, and fifteen people who were directly exposed developed terminal thyroid cancer. The radiation, however, spread far beyond the plant itself, and the number of premature deaths ultimately attributable to subsequent exposure can't be calculated directly, though most estimates are easily in the thousands.

;"Bridge Prone to Aeroelastic Flutter in High Winds" refers to the {{w|Tacoma Narrows Bridge (1940)|Tacoma Narrows Bridge}}.
:The Tacoma Narrows Bridge, a suspension bridge in the U.S. state of Washington, was initially built in 1940. From the time of its construction, the bridge was observed to sway and {{w|Aeroelasticity#Flutter|flutter}} in high winds. About four months after opening, in 40 mile-per-hour (64 km/h) winds, the bridge fluttered so violently that it collapsed into the strait. There were no human fatalities, though several people were injured. This collapse is frequently used to demonstrate the dangers of harmonic vibration in infrastructure, particularly structures exposed to strong winds. The bridge was eventually rebuilt, with a redesign intended to prevent such fluttering.

;The title text refers to the {{w|Space Shuttle Challenger Disaster}}.
:The {{w|Space Shuttle Challenger|''Challenger''}} was an American space shuttle which broke up shortly after its launch in 1986, killing all seven crew members aboard before reaching orbit. The disaster was caused by a failure of O-ring seals on one of the shuttle's rocket boosters and the subsequent leak of hot gases. The likely cause of these failures was the seals being unable to maintain their integrity due to being well below their design temperature range in the immediate lead-up to being exposed to launch conditions, thanks to much colder than normal weather in the launch area. Engineers for the company that had built the boosters raised this concern and recommended postponing the launch, but were overruled.

As illustrated, it appears that the ship is about to sail under the bridge, while the airship will fly over it, causing the tether between the two to snag the bridge unless the airship descends sufficiently before then. It is not clear how or if the reactor will contribute to the resulting incident.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[An airship flying, labeled:]
:Hydrogen-filled scout airship for iceberg spotting
:[The airship is chained to a ship, going along a river, labeled:]
:Unsinkable ocean liner
:[In the background on the coast a nuclear power plant, labeled:]
:Soviet-era nuclear reactor undergoing a turbine test
:[The boat and airship are steering towards a bridge, labeled:]
:Bridge prone to aeroelastic flutter in high winds
:[Two unlabeled icebergs are on the water on either side of the bridge.]

:[Caption below the panel:]
:In retrospect, we should have noticed how nervous the situation was making the engineers.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Engineering]]
[[Category:Aviation]]
[[Category:Space]]

Talk:2947: Pascal's Wager Triangle

2024-06-22T00:20:26Z

WingedCat:

Apparently, if two people are writing a first draft at the same time, the wiki appends one to the other. Welp. [[User:GreatWyrmGold|GreatWyrmGold]] ([[User talk:GreatWyrmGold|talk]]) 02:29, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
:If you add another one it puts it beside the second, and you have Pascal's explanation.[[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.102|172.70.85.102]] 08:33, 18 June 2024 (UTC)

Some religions (such as my own) prohibit polytheism, so that's an added wrench in the works. --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.119|141.101.98.119]] 06:56, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
: I think MOST religions are quite strict about the idea that you are supposed to CHOOSE single religion, preferably the one in question, and not trying to cover all bases by believing in multiple ones. Which is the answer to Pascal's Wager: choosing wrong God is likely to result in worse punishment than choosing none, so better NOT believe. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 09:44, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
:: Well, it might be considered a bad "memetic trait" to have "as well as believing in our thing, you can believe in anything else". (Much as a number of holy books include the instruction that you should not change anything when copying the book, and this would clearly be a "dominant meme" as soon as someone spontaneously thinks to add it to a previously mutable version of the text.) Although there's syncratic religions which are effectively a case of "{{w|Horizontal gene transfer|horizontal meme transfer}}", philoso-evolutionarily.
:: But polythesitic pantheons aren't unusual within a (structurally singular) religion. The three branches of abriamic religion ("There is no god but Jehovah", "There is no god but God (sic)", there is no god but Allah", at least unless you start going into the prevalence of trinitarianism and "praying to individual saints") and I ''think'' Sikhism is rather good at "everything is but an aspect of the one..." (even when it comes to considering other religions' own ideas, and thus nominally folding ). But multi-deity (and zero-deity) religions/beliefs/etc are quite widespread, so an exclusivity of "my god" might be considered rare. (Though, numbers-wise, Christianity (in all its flavours) and Islam (ditto) add up to just over half of the world's population, perhaps being generous with 'habitual followers' rather than just the most devout. So it would be fairly accurate to say that most ''people'' are living under a (theoretically) quite strict monotheistic situation. Not that they all agree with each other quite what 'the singly god' is (even within themselves, ask a Protestent what they think about what a Catholic thinks, as [https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Emo_Philips#Die,_heretic! the famous joke about this goes]; and that's definitely not solely a Christian trait), although that's not what we're counting. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.242.54|172.71.242.54]] 21:05, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
: This reminds me of a novel (I think it was Arthur C. Clarke's ''3001: The Final Odyssey'') where in the distant future, all religions ended up merging into two - one where there is ''at most'' one god and one where there is ''at least'' one god. [[User:Shamino|Shamino]] ([[User talk:Shamino|talk]]) 14:15, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
: A surprisingly large number of religions actually don't care if you additionally are a member of another religion. Happens all the time in eastern Asia.[[Special:Contributions/162.158.212.173|162.158.212.173]] 21:05, 18 June 2024 (UTC)

What if there is a God, but they don't want you to believe in them?[[Special:Contributions/172.70.86.35|172.70.86.35]] 11:48, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
:Or a God, but they have impostor syndrome? [[User:Psychoticpotato|P?sych??otic?pot??at???o ]] ([[User talk:Psychoticpotato|talk]]) 12:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
:Or a God, and he just wants to screw over us all (not in the Yivo sense, mind you)? (Under this condition, all three outcomes are possible: he wants us to believe, he wants to hide, he couldn't care less) [[Special:Contributions/198.41.242.174|198.41.242.174]] 08:05, 19 June 2024 (UTC)

How did the middle Cueball on line 3 not realize that both Gods he was being asked to believe in are the same God (since the ones on line 2 both got it from the same Cueball on line 1)? Is there also a game of Telephone going on? [[User:Barmar|Barmar]] ([[User talk:Barmar|talk]]) 14:29, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
:Tbf there's no clarification by the Line 2 guys that they're talking about the same God. It makes sense that he'd assume they're different. If two different religious people told you at the same time "My God is real" and you'd never really been exposed to religion or atheism, you would assume they were talking about two. Forgive me if I made any unfair assumptions here. [[User:Psychoticpotato|P?sych??otic?pot??at???o ]] ([[User talk:Psychoticpotato|talk]]) 15:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
:Look at the schism in Islam and the huge number of divisions in Christianity. That it may be the same god and same basic religion doesn't mean that it isn't presented entirely differently. For example (what I'm familiar with), Roman Catholic versus Church of England. Similar, but also completely different. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.69.118|141.101.69.118]] 19:03, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
: Presumably each person interprets the diety slightly differently [[User:mouse|mouse]]

>>then there is minimal cost to drawing one anyway<< I argue that drawing a complete pascal's triangle will take infinite time and infinite resources. Which is slightly above "minimal cost"
[[Special:Contributions/108.162.221.61|108.162.221.61]] 05:34, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
:The use of the words "complete" and "infinite" while referring to the same thing is funny to me. I don't know why, though. [[User:Psychoticpotato|P?sych??otic?pot??at???o ]] ([[User talk:Psychoticpotato|talk]]) 13:19, 20 June 2024 (UTC)

I very nearly inserted the following 'argument' paragraph in the Explanation, but decided that it perhaps was a bit of a 'belief' of my own.
(A more realistic approach could be to just outwardly conform to the social expectations of the society to which you belong. With or without any actual core belief, which cannot be tested in any realistic manner during your lifetime, maintaining a performative cohesion with your neighbours and acquaintences would still benefit you in avoiding standing out from the commonly accepted ideology. This may still count as a 'belief' (desirable or undesirable) should this stance ever come to be judged by any deity, with your ultimate fate probably being mirrored by others that you know who are in your exact same ideological position and merely outwardly perpetuting the 'accepted' demonstrations of faith. Assuming that the society's religion is not a self-destructive one, you would have as good a lifetime as circumstances would generally allow, with the ''possibility'' of an afterlife that is at least not uniquely bad for you; unlike the smart-arse who presumes to know what the single best theological stance is and then has to rationalise their attempt to cynically play the odds upon Judgement Day, against a deity who fully understands their base motivations and may even take far less kindly towards a Wagerer than with someone who never ever tried to 'believe' but at least was generally and secularly philanthropic in a way that the deity might be pleased by.)
I stand by the logic, as far as it can ever be taken (without knowing anything useful about the actual mind of God/gods it has to be tested against) but it got a bit long as a 'minor philosophical interlude'. And if the Ultimate Arbiter does ''not'' like Bill-And-Ted-ism (i.e. "be excellent to each other") and getting along with your community, instead prefers more outstandingly misanthropic worldly behaviours (because the only 'heavenly' afterlife is more Valhalla than Asphodel Meadows; anyone who even mildly disappoints goes to the Hades/Tartarus equivalent) without actually clueing us in on this particular Ineffable Plan, then the fate of many (who ''don't'' make earthly lives more miserable for the rest of us) is pretty much doomed from the start and even the most perfect Pascalian Wagerer probably never managed to stand on the right side of the philosophical barrier either. This whole argument is not even a novel philosophy, of course, but it's mine. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.195.56|172.69.195.56]] 16:36, 21 June 2024 (UTC)

Doesn't the exact wording of the alt text not technically call for a classic Pascal's Wager, but rather an inverted triangle where there is only one number at the bottom, two in the row above the bottom, et cetera? (Since there have to be two numbers above every number: the traditional exception for the top row and the numbers at the sides isn't present.) Given such a triangle, wouldn't the only possible solutions be all-0, all-positive-infinity, or all-negative-infinity, which certain readings of "number" might restrict to the all-0 solution? [[User:WingedCat|WingedCat]] ([[User talk:WingedCat|talk]]) 00:20, 22 June 2024 (UTC)

2297: Use or Discard By

2020-04-27T16:31:36Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2297
| date = April 22, 2020
| title = Use or Discard By
| image = use_or_discard_by.png
| titletext = One of the things of bear spray says that, and I'm not one to disobey safety instructions, but there are no bears around here. Guess it's time for a camping trip where we leave lots of food out!
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BOT WITH A USE BY DATE. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

Many products carry a "Use By", "{{w|Expiration date}}", "Discard by" or similar date. The date shows the latest date by which the product has been verified to provide its expected use. For example, a foodstuff will have a "consume by" date, showing the date after which the food may be unsuitable for eating. For most products, this is a conservative estimate, especially if a product is kept sealed and stored in a cool, dark place. A few products become dangerous to use after that point, some simply become stale and less palatable (as in the case of foods) or lose potency. For most consumer items, there's no immediate imperative to discard a product as soon as it expires; you simply take the risk of a decline in quality or reliability.

One of the issues around expiration dates is that the language used tends to be arbitrary and ambiguous. Some have explicit instructions to the consumer, such as "use by:", others have instructions to the seller, such as "sell by:", still others say things such as "best by:" or "freshest before:". This can make it confusing how important it is to get rid of a given product on that date.

In this comic, two similar emergency {{w|flare gun}}s, an item typically used to send out distress {{w|flare}}s, have slightly different expiry instructions. One has an instruction to "use by or discard by" a specific date (in this case, three days after the date of publishing). The other has an instruction to "use by" this date. These two phrases almost certainly have the same intent. There would be no reason to actually fire the flare. Even the instructions to discard the flare gun really just mean that the manufacturer cannot guarantee that it will work past the printed date, and so do not advise counting on it in an emergency situation.

Despite this implication, [[Megan]] seems to take the latter instruction literally, as an order to actually fire the flare gun prior to the expiration date, whether or not it's necessary. It may be taken that she wants the experience of firing a flare, and takes that instruction as an excuse to do so. [[Cueball]] immediately objects to this line of reasoning. Firing a flare unnecessarily is generally a bad idea. It could summon emergency responders to a non-emergency situation, diverting emergency resources that may be needed elsewhere. Even worse, if a flare is fired improperly, or in an unsafe direction, it could cause a fire and/or injuries, ironically creating an emergency situation, rather than signalling one.

The title text similarly indicates that Megan intends to follow the same instructions with a can of {{w|bear spray}}. Since there are no bears present, she will go camping and leave her food out to attract their attention, so that she may use the bear spray to repel bears before it "goes bad". This would involve approaching bears (close enough to spray them) and irritating them, potentially causing them to attack if the spray is ineffective or misapplied (perhaps it only works if they smell it, but Megan might spray another part of the bear), when it would be much safer to simply discard the bear spray and not get close to bears.

The title text appears to be misspelled; it says "One of the things of bear spray" instead of the more likely intended "One of the tins of bear spray".

Expiration dates (for food) have also been mentioned in [[737: Yogurt]], [[1109: Refrigerator]], and [[2178: Expiration Date High Score]].

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[Megan stands in the middle of the panel, holding two flare guns, one in each hand.]
:Megan: These emergency flare guns are about to expire.
:Cueball [off-panel]: I forgot we had those.

:[Cueball sitting at a desk, working on a computer.]
:Megan [off-panel]: This one says "Use or discard by Apr 25 2020."
:Cueball: Okay...

:[Megan holds up one of the flare guns looking at it. She holds the other flare gun by her side.]
:Megan: But '''''this''''' one just says "Use by" ...
:Cueball [off-panel]: '''''No.'''''

== Trivia ==
* Twenty-seven years ago exactly ([https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1993/04/22 April 22, 1993]), ''Calvin and Hobbes'' made a similar joke about expiration dates on milk. Obviously the humor has a very long shelf-life.
* This comic shares some similarities with [[1821: Incinerator]], particularly in the last panel.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]

2293: RIP John Conway

2020-04-16T05:12:08Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2293
| date = April 13, 2020
| title = RIP John Conway
| image = rip_john_conway.gif
| titletext = 1937-2020
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a GLIDER. Needs more in-depth explanation of how the Game Evolves. Include remaining stills from the GIF in the table below. Should also expand more on why Conway is a person of note. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
{{w|John Horton Conway|John Conway}}, an English mathematician, passed away of [[:Category:COVID-19|COVID-19]] on April 11, 2020. Two days later, [[Randall]] created this [[:Category:Tribute|memorial comic]]. It is the 6th memorial comic, but it is the first released in almost 5 years, since [[1560: Bubblegum]].

One of Conway's most famous creations was the {{w|cellular automaton}} known as {{w|Conway's Game of Life}}. A cellular automaton is a machine composed of cells, each of which can be in a different state. Every generation, each cell in the automaton may transition to a new state depending on a set of rules. (Conway's work in mathematics was vast and various, but he is perhaps best known in the field for discovering the {{w|surreal numbers}}, which inspired Donald Knuth to write a novel which may have been referenced back in [[505: A Bunch of Rocks]].)

Conway's Game of Life was first popularized to the general public in the form of a game, Life Genesis, bundled into some distributions of Windows 3.1, an operating system from the early-90s that Randall most likely used in his preteen years.

Conway's Game of Life is a 2-state automaton (i.e., every cell can be "alive" or "dead") that is implemented on a two-dimensional grid of cells using the {{w|Moore neighborhood}} - this means that each cell can only be influenced by the eight cells directly surrounding it, both orthogonally and diagonally. The transition rules that Conway discovered are as follows:

* If an "alive" cell has no live neighbors, or only one live neighbor, it becomes "dead". (This simulates death by isolation).
* If an "alive" cell has four or more live neighbors, it becomes "dead". (This simulates death by overcrowding).
* If a "dead" cell has exactly three live neighbors, it becomes "alive". (This simulates birth).

Despite the simplicity of these three rules, Conway showed that patterns of amazing complexity can nonetheless develop out of simple cell arrangements. Some patterns do not evolve at all ("still lifes"), some enter a cyclic, repeating state ("oscillators"), and some reproduce their own pattern displaced by an offset, resulting in patterns that can move across the grid under their own power ("gliders" and "spaceships"). This last category is of particular interest, as it allows the Game of Life to transmit information from one location to another, allowing for rich, dynamic behavior and even for the creation of computational machines within the automaton itself.

This comic begins with the shape of a stick figure as the starting cell configuration of the Game of Life. The black cells are "alive" and the white cells are "dead". This configuration then evolves via Conway's rules, disintegrating into nothingness except for a five-cell pattern known as a "glider", which ascends up and to the right. This visually suggests a "soul" breaking away from the disintegrating corporeal body. The glider is perhaps the most iconic pattern of the Game of Life, and is often used symbolically to represent the phenomenon of emergence. However, any given Game of Life is on a finite grid, so once the glider leaves the grid, it has ceased to exist.

The initial state presented in the comic does actually evolve in that manner, as can be verified by entering the pattern into a cellular automaton simulator such as [http://golly.sourceforge.net/ Golly] or web services such as [https://bitstorm.org/gameoflife/ this one]. It seems that no one else have created this pattern before. At least, despite discussion in the comments, no one has found anything to show that this is not Randall's own discovery of this pattern.

The title text simply states Conway's birth and death year: 1937-2020.

Conway's Game of Life was previously mentioned in [[696: Strip Games]]. Cellular automata was also referenced in [[505: A Bunch of Rocks]].

This comic is the 18th comic in a row (not counting the [[2288: Collector's Edition|April Fools' comic]]) in a [[:Category:COVID-19|series of comics]] related to the {{w|2019–20 coronavirus outbreak|2020 pandemic}} of the {{w|coronavirus}} {{w|SARS-CoV-2}}, which causes {{w|COVID-19}}. Although this comic is, of course, mainly a tribute to John Conway, the fact that he died of COVID-19 in the middle of this long series of corona related comics by Randall is relevant.

==Table of generations==
{| class="wikitable"
!Generation
!Notes
|-
|[[File:Generation 0.jpg|thumb]]||Starting state (or "zeroth generation").
|-
|[[File:Generation 1.jpg|thumb]]||First generation. Note that this image is not aligned with the previous one: the position of all cells has shifted downward by one cell. All further generations are aligned the same as this one.
|-
|[[File:Generation 2.jpg|thumb]]||Second generation.
|-
|[[File:Generation 3.jpg|thumb]]||Third generation.
|-
|[[File:Generation 4.jpg|thumb]]||Fourth generation.
|-
|[[File:Generation 5.jpg|thumb]]||Fifth generation.
|-
|[[File:Generation 6.jpg|thumb]]||Sixth generation. The first appearance of the glider, a well-known formation in Conway's Game of Life.
|-
|[[File:Generation 7.jpg|thumb]]||Seventh generation. The glider takes on its other shape.
|-
|[[File:Generation 8.jpg|thumb]]||Eighth generation. The glider returns to its first shape, pointing right instead of up.
|-
|[[File:Generation 9.jpg|thumb]]||Ninth generation. The glider's second shape again, pointing right instead of up.
|-
|[[File:Generation 10.jpg|thumb]]||Tenth generation. The glider is now in its original form, but one cell higher and one cell to the right. It will continue to progress, cycling through these four states every four generations. The remains of the chaos down below will take two more generations to disappear completely.
|}

==Transcript==
:[A pixelated image of a stick figure using 21 pixels, could be a pixel Cueball, which waves with one hand up while holding the other hand down. The head consist of 7 pixels, the top row of three having two pixels beneath the two outer pixels, thus having two empty pixels beneath the central pixel. The neck and torso is a typical cross made from six pixels. The two legs are two pixels each shifted left and right of the cross. The arm to the left that waves is two pixels one down and the next back up to the level of the cross central beam. The arm to the right has the first pixel similarly but the second pixel continues one further step down. After less than one second it turns out that the image is animated, with the pixels changing according to the rules of Conway's Game of Life. The figure splits into three groups, two of which dissipates in a similar way at the bottom of the panel. The other becomes a 'glider' and moves off to the top-right corner of the image and out of the frame. The animation then repeats.]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Tribute]]
[[Category:COVID-19]]
[[Category:Comics with animation]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]]

2157: Diploma Legal Notes

2019-06-06T20:43:40Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2157
| date = May 31, 2019
| title = Diploma Legal Notes
| image = diploma_legal_notes.png
| titletext = If you're planning to challenge the royal family, you should probably wait 6-8 weeks, since a number of the younger ones have diplomas and Kate was actually on the varsity lightsaber team at St Andrews.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a CHALLENGER TO THE BRITISH THRONE with a working light-sabre, who thinks the layout is very ugly of this explanation. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

A class of 2019 graduate, presumably for some college or university, is given some rather unusual privileges for graduating.

A common line in degree granting ceremonies is "the degree of X is conferred with all the rights and privileges pertaining thereto." This dates from the Roman Empire and continued through the rise of the university as an institution in medieval times. In the Roman era, the rights and privileges accorded to physicians and scholars included exemption from certain civic duties and military services, immunity from certain levies and from being summoned to court unduly, and even granting a state salary. In the medieval era, rights generally mirrored those of ecclesiastical figures and included immunity from civil law (instead scholars were subject to canon, or church law), as well as safe conduct on their travels between jurisdictions.

While true that some degrees do grant professional privileges today, generally additional accreditation beyond the degree is required (passing the bar, medical certification, etc.) to gain anything most people would consider a privilege or right or incur any obligation. (The obligation to pay your student loans back exists regardless of completing your degree).

; You may now legally perform marriages and arrest people.
: Depending on the jurisdiction, these may or may not be privileges that one already has by virtue of being in a particular jurisdiction or being part of a particular culture.

: In some cultures, a couple might be recognized as married if they meet certain conditions (as opposed to being legally recognized by a religious or civil authority), such as being recognized by the community or after the {{w|Inuit_women#Family_structure_and_marriage|birth of their first child}}. Because states often provide benefits (tax reductions, social services, etc) for being married, they often require that, in order to receive the benefits, that a marriage have a registered person recognize the marriage, which is likely the privilege that this graduating class' diploma is supposedly granting.

: In common law jurisdictions, {{w|Citizen's arrest|citizen's arrest}} is legal without a warrant in some situations, although in many cases, it is better to let a police officer arrest criminals due to potential legal and safety issues that might arise. The privilege granted by graduating might grant or extend this privilege, depending on where the graduating class is located.

; If you have your diploma with you, you can use grocery store express lanes with any number of items.
: It has become common for a small number of checkout lanes of a larger store to be explicitly reserved as "express" lanes for the use of those with, for example, fewer than 10 items. This lets someone with a few items (handheld, in a basket, or possibly in a low-capacity cart) who will pass through quickly avoid being held up by people purchasing larger numbers of items who will take longer.

: In some cases, shoppers may try to argue the true meaning of "fewer than N items" in their favor, for example by arguing that "3 for the price of 2" promotions should only count as two items. The prevailing interpretation of "express" may be driven by the opinion of the surrounding shoppers who are also queuing for an express checkout lane and who may express displeasure at the taking of such liberties.

: Whether or not it is genuinely more beneficial to have the privilege of using the express lane with any number of items is [http://theintrepid.blogspot.com/2009/09/choosing-fastest-checkout-counter.html arguable] due to various complex factors, but the new holder of the diploma (who is, ironically, now possibly capable of defining the number of items more rigorously depending upon the academic subject just mastered) need not concern themselves with counting the number of items in their basket or ever needing to wait behind slow shoppers ever again (provided they always carry their diploma with them when they do their shopping).

; All graduates are entitled to delete one word of their choice from the Oxford English Dictionary.
: The {{w|Oxford English Dictionary}} (OED) is the principal historical dictionary of the English language, published by Oxford University Press. It is unclear what benefit deleting a word from the OED would provide, and doing so would prevent anyone else from looking up the word which would typically be seen as a disadvantage. As the OED is often used as an authority on which words are valid words in the English language (for example for word games such as {{w|Countdown (game show)|Countdown}}), perhaps the intention is that such "deleted" words are in fact removed from the English language itself.

: A different interpretation is the right to delete literally one word. While mostly useless, it could be used to alter some definitions, removing some details or even completely reversing the meaning by deleting "not".

: The OED [https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/explore/how-many-words-are-there-in-the-english-language/ contains around 228000 words]. Given that US universities and colleges alone are expected to award [https://nces.ed.gov/fastfacts/display.asp?id=372 around 1.9 million bachelor's degrees] each year, this policy could lead to a rapid collapse of the OED.

; The university will mail you your working lightsaber within 6-8 weeks.
: Doctoral degree recipients wear various forms of dress or other items. For example, in Finland a [https://www.jyu.fi/en/academic-events/degrees-ceremony/instructions/doctoral-hat-and-sword doctoral sword] is traditional. A {{w|lightsaber}} is a fictional weapon from the {{w|Star Wars}} universe which is used in a manner similar to a sword but which would likely be highly-regulated if it did exist in the real world due to its extreme power (in Star Wars, lightsabers are capable of cutting or burning through most materials and is only stopped by another lightsaber).

: "6-8 weeks" is a [https://meta.stackexchange.com/a/19514/184432 meme made popular on Stack Overflow] meaning that the person making the estimate has no idea how long something is actually going to take or whether it's even going to happen at all.

; You can send mail without stamps.
: The {{w|Franking#Franking_privilege|franking privilege}} allows sending mail without stamps and is often granted to legislators conducting "official business." A group of legislators elected at the same time may sometimes be referred to as the "class of ''year''" (such as [https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/11/28/us/politics/congress-freshman-class.html "the congressional freshman class of 2019..."]), which may be seen as a parallel to a year of graduates from a university.

; You have earned the right to challenge the British royal family to {{w|trial by combat}}. If you defeat them all, the throne is yours.
: "Trial by combat" or "ritual combat" was a manner to settle disputes where two individuals would engage in a duel, with the winner being declared right. This type of ritual combat was depicted in the film ''{{w|Black Panther (film)|Black Panther}}'', with the winner of the combat declared the king of Wakanda. T'Challa, the Black Panther, was victorious in a fight against M'Baku, but was defeated by Erik Killmonger.

: The {{w|British royal family}} consists of the descendants and relatives of the current Queen, Queen Elizabeth II. However, {{w|Succession_to_the_British_throne|the line of succession}} to the throne consists of potentially over 4,000 individuals; it is possible that a challenger would have to duel all of them, starting at the bottom of the line. The British royal family was also referenced in [[2003: Presidential Succession]].

; You may now ignore "Do Not Pet" warnings on airport security dogs.
: Security dogs are typically used in airports for the purpose of identifying explosives, drugs, or other prohibited items by smell. Although these dogs often work in private areas of the airport, they may sometimes be seen in public areas.

:Since dogs, in most western societies, are primarily kept as pets, it's a common reaction to want to interact playfully with the animals. This is prohibited for security dogs for multiple reasons. Petting the dog can distract it and otherwise prevent it from carrying out its job. In some cases the dogs may be aggressive to unsolicited contact. Criminals might deliberately attempt to distract or even poison security dogs to prevent detection. As such, the dogs typically carry a warning to not pet them and someone who ignores the warning will likely be detained for questioning. However, according to this comic, the holder of the diploma is supposedly permitted to pet such dogs with no consequences, despite the warnings.

The title text builds on the items about lightsabers and the British royal family and advises that, because several of the younger royals also have diplomas, they have received their lightsaber already. Thus you should wait at least the 6-8 weeks until your lightsaber arrives to have a fair chance, given that lightsabers is a very lethal weapon. Also some of them may even be proficient with the weapon. Special mention goes to {{w|Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge}}, aka Kate Middleton, who was supposedly on the {{w|Varsity_team#Varsity_in_the_United_Kingdom|varsity}} lightsaber team at {{w|University of St Andrews|St Andrews}}.

==Transcript==
:[An official document with a title at the top between two images of graduation hats on either side:]

:<big>Congratulations, Class of 2019!</big>

:Your diploma grants you many new powers and privileges. These include:
:* You may now legally perform marriages and arrest people.
:* If you have your diploma with you, you can use grocery store express lanes with any number of items.
:* All graduates are entitled to delete one word of their choice from the Oxford English Dictionary.
:* The university will mail you your working lightsaber within 6-8 weeks.
:* You can send mail without stamps.
:* You have earned the right to challenge the British royal family to trial by combat. If you defeat them all, the throne is yours.
:* You may now ignore "Do Not Pet" warnings on airport security dogs.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Star Wars]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]]

2155: Swimming

2019-06-06T20:18:11Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 2155
| date = May 27, 2019
| title = Swimming
| before = [[#Explanation|↓ Skip to explanation ↓]]
| image = swimming.png
| titletext = "You don't know how high above you the sky goes, but you're not freaking out about that." "Well, NOW I am!"
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a CONTINENTAL SHELF. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
This comic is about an irrational fear about the depth of water beneath oneself, also known as {{w|thalassophobia}}. Whenever you don't explicitly know how deep the water is, and cannot see the bottom, there is nothing preventing the sea/lake/riverbed from being exceptionally far away. This phenomenon is actually quite common with many bodies of water having a relatively shallow shelf extending a short ways out from land. These typically end with little to no warning, giving rise to the fear that is depicted here.

It is an '''irrational''' fear because if one is swimming, the depth of the water underneath is not important to safety as long as one can reliably get back to shore. (This fear may be due to excessively worrying about what happens if one stops swimming, thinking that walking should be safer because almost everyone spends more time walking than swimming, ignoring the fact that the safest thing to do in this case is to keep swimming.) If one is wading, presumably one would feel the bottom drop away. Following the safety saying "Walk out, swim back" would help avoid this situation.

Here, [[Megan]] and [[Cueball]] are in in the ocean, with Cueball treading water and Megan standing on the seabed, with another girl in the water and another Cueball watching from the beach. Megan mentions that she can still touch bottom, thus thinking it is safe. In front of her however the seabed drops off steeply, becoming nearly vertical. Fish and jellyfish are in the water below, while at the bottom of the frame, but not the sea floor, a small ledge holds an octopus and a beach umbrella.

The beach umbrella may be from the beach, to give human scale. It could also be a {{w|Lemmings (video game)|Lemmings}} reference.

The title text alludes to the fact that humans live at or near the bottom of a vast sea of air: the atmosphere. Every day, most people never rise far from the floor of the atmosphere. However, this is nowhere near as perilous as descending to the bottom of a sea of water. Indeed, surviving a rise to the top of the atmosphere requires life support measures. Also, unlike in water, humans are far too dense to "swim" (fly) in the atmosphere.

===Related comics===
*In [[731: Desert Island]] a similar vision of not knowing what is beneath the surface is depicted.
*Randall provided the depths of various bodies of water without mentioning any specific fears in [[1040: Lakes and Oceans]].
*The title text may be a reference to [[1115: Sky]], where [[Megan]] similarly starts freaking out about the depth of the sky.
*[[what if%3F]] [https://what-if.xkcd.com/103/ #103] covers what would happen if all the bodies of water vanished. It refers to the sharp drop-off of the continental shelf, and divides boats into two categories: those over the shelf that crash within a few seconds, and those past the shelf that take up to a minute to reach bottom.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[The single panel comic is around 4 times higher than it is wide (317×1284 pixels). Cueball is watching from the beach while Megan with another character is standing neck deep in water near an extreme drop off (continental shelf?) and another Cueball is swimming further. This part of the comic is at the very top, and the characters are drawn much smaller than usual.]

:Megan: It's OK, I can still touch bottom here.

:[As the tall image is scrolled down, there are some deep water fish, a jellyfish, and an octopus, a bottom ledge with a beach umbrella on it, and another drop off.]

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I love swimming, but occasionally I realize I don't know how deep the water under me is and it freaks me out.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Large drawings‏‎]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]

2153: Effects of High Altitude

2019-06-06T20:04:46Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 2153
| date = May 22, 2019
| title = Effects of High Altitude
| image = effects_of_high_altitude.png
| titletext = If she'd lived in Flagstaff (elevation 6,903 feet), Cruella de Vil would only have needed 89 dalmatians for her coat.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a HIGH BOT. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
This comic starts out with three effects of high altitude related to the air getting "thinner" and the lower air pressure. {{w|Denver}} is one mile (5280 feet or 1609 meters) above sea-level (as marked on the steps of the State Capitol). At this elevation, the [http://www.altitude.org/air_pressure.php average atmospheric pressure] is about 83% of sea level pressure, or about 840 mbar instead of 1013 mbar, and [https://www.sensorsone.com/local-gravity-calculator/ gravity] is 99.94% of gravity at sea level at the same latitude, or 9.796 m/s2 instead of 9.801 m/s2. This has a number of effects:

* Water {{w|boiling|boils}} at 202 degrees F (94 degrees C), slightly lower than the baseline 212 degrees F (100 degrees C) it takes at sea level.
* Baseballs and golf balls fly slightly farther (with the same initial velocity, the distance is inversely proportional to gravitational acceleration so it would be 0.06% farther; in addition, the lower air pressure will reduce the resistance from the air the ball will experience, therefore it will slow down at a lower rate and thus fly even farther than the 0.06% due to gravity).
* {{w|Sunburn}} develops faster because there is less atmosphere above to filter out harmful ultraviolet rays.

As usual for xkcd, the effects of high altitude are extended in a comically absurd manner, applying this "slightly less" rule to things that have nothing to do with altitude:

* {{w|Scrabble}} is a board game where each letter is assigned a point value based on its frequency of use in the edition's language. The comic claims all letters are worth 16% more. When applied to the {{w|Scrabble_letter_distributions#English|normal values for the Scrabble tiles in English}}
** Q is worth 12 instead of 10
** X is worth 9 instead of 8
** Y is worth 5 instead of 4
This point increase would have little impact in the board game when two players sit across each other. However, it would imply that scrabble played via internet should require players to state their altitude at the begin of the online game which then assigns advantages to higher-altitude players. This advantage seems arbitrary, unless the altitude difference is really significant enough to impede the thinking ability of the higher-altitude party.
* A common {{w|superstition}} states that breaking a mirror causes 7 years of bad luck. The comic claims that at higher altitudes, only 5½ years are caused. This implies that people living at higher altitudes have less bad luck.
* Marketing campaigns will often state "X is the new Y" to draw the audience of Y in toward the newer X. When used with age, usually at 10 year intervals ("40 is the new 30" is the slogan referenced), it is an attempt to convince an older audience that they can share in an experience commonly associated with a younger audience. At higher elevations, the comic claims, people can use or do things designated for an even younger audience. This is contrary to facts however: Most activities, especially in sports, are more difficult in higher altitudes, not easier.
** In the base 16 ({{w|Hexadecimal|hexadecimal}}) number system, the value 28 represents 2 * 16^1 + 8 * 16^0 = 40. Thus, 40 is the new 28. Remember that, although {{w| Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything|Douglas Adams doesn't write jokes about other bases}}, Randall [[1000: 1000 Comics|does]].
* German band {{w|Nena (band)|Nena}}'s hit ''99 Red Balloons'' (an English adaptation of the original song called ''{{w|99 Luftballons}}'') is a song about a (not necessarily nuclear) war started by a large clump of balloons mistaken for enemy aircraft (although the original German song refers to "UFOs aus dem All", the lyrics of the English-language song say "There's something here from somewhere else" which does not imply extraterrestrial origins, merely that the object is not of domestic origin; and "the war machine springs to life", which implies that a rival nation on earth is thought to be the culprit). The comic claims that if launched from a higher altitude, 94 balloons would have sufficed.
* {{w|420 (cannabis culture)|4:20}} is a code word for {{w|cannabis}} and has evolved in some circles to be the socially acceptable hour to consume cannabis. This has in turn evolved into a joke that when checking the time and finding it is exactly 4:20, people will add "blaze it" as a reference. The comic claims that, at higher altitudes, the socially acceptable time is earlier, so if there is an elevation of one mile, the socially acceptable time would be 4:17 and therefore, marijuana jokes are made earlier. This joke is probably related to the {{w|Cannabis in Colorado|legalization of recreational marijuana use in Colorado}}.

In the title text, ''{{w|One Hundred and One Dalmatians (franchise)|One Hundred and One Dalmatians}}'' is a Disney franchise (based on a children's book), where the villain, {{w|Cruella de Vil}}, aims to capture and kill 99 Dalmatian puppies (97 in the book) to have the perfect spotted fur coat. (The title includes the parents [book: and other Dalmatian caregivers] of the Dalmatian puppies.) The comic claims that, at a higher altitude in {{w|Flagstaff, Arizona|Flagstaff}} (6903 ft / 2104 m), she would only have needed 89 Dalmatians, possibly implying that puppies at higher altitudes are bigger (perhaps because there is {{w|Decompression (altitude)|less air pressure to compress them}}) or that Cruella de Vil at high altitudes is smaller (possibly because of the {{w|Wrinkle#Water-immersion wrinkling|higher humidity and lower temperature}}).

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:'''Effects of High Altitude'''
:How life is different at one mile above sea level
:(e.g. in Denver)

:[Eight small panels, each containing an image with a caption at the top:]

:Water boils at 202°F
:[A pot on a stovetop, with steam rising from the pot]

:Baseballs and golf balls fly 5-10% farther
:[A baseball flying through the air]

:Sunburns develop significantly faster
:[Five wavy arrows hitting a curved surface, two at a low point and three at a high point]

:Scrabble letters are worth 16% more
:[Scrabble tiles for letters Q, X and Y with point values 12, 9 and 5, respectively]

:Breaking a mirror only causes 5½ years of bad luck
:[Cueball looking down at a broken hand mirror on the floor]

:40 is the new 28
:[Cueball and Megan are talking. Megan is gesturing]
:Megan: 50 is the new 40, and when you account for elevation it's more like 37.

:Nuclear war can be started with only 94 red balloons.
:[Five black balloons floating]

:People make marijuana jokes slightly earlier
:[Cueball and Ponytail are talking. Ponytail is looking at her phone]
:Cueball: Hey, what time is it?
:Ponytail: 4:17 Blaze it!

==Trivia==
*A similar effect on sports caused by different latitudes was the topic of [[852: Local g]].

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]

2117: Differentiation and Integration

2019-02-27T19:09:15Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */ An actual explanation.

{{comic
| number = 2117
| date = February 27, 2019
| title = Differentiation and Integration
| image = differentiation_and_integration.png
| titletext = "Symbolic integration" is when you theatrically go through the motions of finding integrals, but the actual result you get doesn't matter because it's purely symbolic.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BESSEL FUNCTION? Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
This comic provides a {{w|flowchart}} purporting to show the process of differentiation, and another for integration.

{{w|Derivative|Differentiation}} and {{w|Antiderivative|Integration}} are two major components of {{w|calculus}}. As many Calculus 2 students are painfully aware, integration is much more complicated than the differentiation it undoes.

However, Randall dramatically overstates this point here. After the first step of integration, Randall assumes that any integration can not be solved so simply, and then dives into a step named "????", suggesting that it is unknowable how to proceed. (The four ?s are not all on the same line, which implies further chaos and confusion.) The rest of the flowchart is (we can assume deliberately) even harder to follow, and does not reach a conclusion. This is in contrast to the simple, straightforward flowchart for differentiation.

It should be noted that Randall slightly undermines his point by providing four different methods, and an "etc", for attempting differentiation with no guidelines for selecting between them. (The "etc" in particular should not be here, as lists like this should name every single element without relying on the reader to be able to fill in unstated parts.)

===Differentiation===
'''{{w|Chain rule}}'''

'''{{w|Power Rule}}'''
???

'''{{w|Quotient rule}}'''
???

'''{{w|Product rule}}'''
???

===Integration===
'''{{w|Integration by parts}}'''
???

'''{{w|Integration by substitution|Substitution}}'''
???

'''{{w|Cauchy's integral formula|Cauchy's Formula}}'''
???

'''{{w|Partial_fraction_decomposition#Application_to_symbolic_integration|Partial Fractions}}'''

'''Install Mathematica'''

{{w|Mathematica}} is a modern technical computing system spanning most areas. One of its features is to compute mathematical functions. This step in the flowchart is install and use Mathematica to compute to do the integration for you.

'''{{w|Riemann integral|Riemann Integration}}'''
???

'''{{w|Stokes' Theorem}}'''
???

'''{{w|Risch Algorithm}}'''
???

'''{{w|Bessel Function}}'''
???

'''{{w|Symbolic integration}}'''
Mentioned in the title text. ???

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[Two flow charts are shown.]

:[The first flow chart has four steps in simple order, one with multiple recommendations.]
:DIFFERENTIATION
:Start
:Try applying
::Chain Rule
::Power Rule
::Quotient Rule
::Product Rule
::Etc.
:Done?
::Yes
::No
:Done!

[The second flow chart begins like the first, then descends into chaos.]
:INTEGRATION
:Start
:Try applying
::Integration by Parts
::Substitution
:Done?
:Haha, Nope!

:[Chaos, Roughly from left to right, top to bottom, direction arrows not included.]
::Cauchy's Formula
::????
::???!?
::???
::???
::?
::Partial Fractions
::??
::?
::Install Mathematica
::?
::Riemann Integration
::Stokes' Theorem
::???
::?
::Risch Algorithm
::???
::[Sad face.]
::?????
::???
::What the heck is a Bessel Function??
::Phone calls to mathematicians
::Oh No
::Burn the Evidence


{{comic discussion}}

2116: .NORM Normal File Format

2019-02-27T18:26:44Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2116
| date = February 25, 2019
| title = .NORM Normal File Format
| image = norm_normal_file_format.png
| titletext = At some point, compression becomes an aesthetic design choice. Luckily, SVG is a really flexible format, so there's no reason it can't support vector JPEG artifacts.
}}

==Explanation==
Cueball's friend seems to have sent him a rather unusual datafile passed off as a new "normal" standard.

Here is a photo example of what Cueball might have seen, but presumably with numbers or other data rather than words:

[[File:XKCD2116.norm.jpg|100px]]

People who work with data, and need data sent to them electronically, typically need it sent in a way that they can easily use it – either in a text format that can be copy-pasted, or as a spreadsheet or CSV file that can be imported into a spreadsheet program, or such.
Information sent by Cueball's friend in this fashion – a photograph of a spreadsheet embedded into a word processing file – is absolutely useless for any purpose beyond being looked at. The recipient has no choice but to retype the entire data set, or attempt to use optical character recognition (OCR), and hope that no mistakes are made in the process.

Any functional relationships between data (such as formulas used to compute data values) have been lost. Further, the size of the data is bloated by being converted first from numbers and formulas into text, then text into graphics, and then from graphics to embedded graphics in a word processing document. This adds nothing to the content, and only adds steps to the process of retrieving the data.

However useless this kind of data manipulation might be, it is becoming more and more common, especially as more non-computer literate people find "creative" ways to exchange information. Cueball's friend suggests that this is now a normal way to send files, and that Cueball should update his system to support this new type of file, represented by a ".norm" suffix.

The caption acknowledges that this has become a ''de facto'' standard and that we should just accept and formalize it.

The comic image links to a [https://twitter.com/openelex/status/853977391747801088 tweet by OpenElections] that displays an Excel file produced by the City of Detroit that contains a lookup table for the city's absentee precincts in 2016. The data had been input as clip art (images) of the values, instead of being entered in the spreadsheet cells.

This comic is reminiscent of the comic [[763:_Workaround|Workaround]], which also describes convoluted formats.

The title text suggests that eventually compression (or at least compression with data/quality loss) will be unnecessary as technology improves in the future. SVG ({{w|Scalable Vector Graphics}}) is a vector graphic format that is fundamentally a lossless format, representing images using geometric figures. {{w|JPEG}} is a lossy format, representing images as an array of rectangles approximating the original image. Randall suggests that some people in the future may choose to include JPEG artifacts to SVG vector graphics for its "aesthetics", perhaps as a throwback to when lower quality JPEG images were commonplace, or as a form of {{w|glitch art}}. It is possible that some in the future will view JPEG artifacts as giving their images a quaint/retro feel, much the way that some people today use sepia-tone filters on their images.

This is made even more reasonable by the fact that the SVG spec employs a lot of filters, and already can embed regular pixel-based JPEG files. Furthermore, it allows JavaScript to be used to manipulate objects, meaning such an effect may be implementable in the current SVG 2.0 spec.

But this is all undone by the request for "vector JPEG". JPEG is a raster format, not a vector format. Vector formats encode data about lines and shapes and so on, while raster formats encode data about each pixel or groups of pixels. Vector formats can be translated to raster at a given resolution - line A means pixels X, Y, and Z, for example - but translating the other way is difficult - if you have pixels X, Y, and Z in a row, it is not possible to be entirely certain whether they are supposed to be a line or three small dots. Thus, there is not (and, from some points of view, can not be) such a thing as "vector JPEG".

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is at a computer. Someone is talking to him from off-panel.]
:Voice: I sent you the data.
:Cueball: Thanks!
:Cueball: …this is a Word document containing an embedded photo you took of your screen with the spreadsheet open.
:Voice: Yeah? Does your computer not support .NORM files? Maybe you need to update.

:[Caption below the panel:]
:Since everyone sends stuff this way anyway, we should just formalize it as a standard.

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Computers]]

{{comic discussion}}

2110: Error Bars

2019-02-15T19:06:12Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2110
| date = February 11, 2019
| title = Error Bars
| image = error_bars.png
| titletext = ...an effect size of 1.68 (95% CI: 1.56 (95% CI: 1.52 (95% CI: 1.504 (95% CI: 1.494 (95% CI: 1.488 (95% CI: 1.485 (95% CI: 1.482 (95% CI: 1.481 (95% CI: 1.4799 (95% CI: 1.4791 (95% CI: 1.4784...
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by an INFINITE SERIES OF ERROR BARS. Readers apparently develop three different views depending on their expertise with statistics. Views should be listed separately (see comments). Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

On statistical charts and graphs, it is common to include {{w|error bars}} showing the probable variation of the actual value from the value shown (or the possible error of the value shown). Since there is always uncertainty in any given measurement, the error bars help an observer evaluate how accurate the data shown is, or the implications if the true value is within the likely error, rather than the exact value shown. There are statistical methods for calculating error bars (they can show a {{w|standard deviation}}, a {{w|standard error}}, or a {{w|confidence interval}}) but the fact that there are multiple ways of calculating them - plus general unfamiliarity with statistical methods - means that people often misinterpret or misunderstand them.

As charts may be of data that has been mathematically processed, the known error from the recording process must also be mathematically processed in order to determine the likely error in the final result. Different transformations of the data result in different transformations of the error, and the correctness of the transformations used can sometimes depend on the subtle differences in the distribution of the source data. At a loss as to how to correctly propagate his error, [[Randall]] instead puts error bars on the ends of his error bars, to reflect the fact that the error has been combined with other error, or the fact that the error bars also have uncertainty or errors themselves. However, since his second error bar calculations are also suspect, he puts a third set of error bars on them. This repeats {{w|ad infinitum}} creating a fractal similar to a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cantor_set Cantor set]

In the title text, he states that the {{w|effect size}} is 1.68 and follows it with the 95% confidence interval (a range of possible values which has a 95% estimated probability of containing the true value), which would normally be represented by something like "1.68 (95% CI 1.56 - 1.80)." Since he is stating that those bounds are uncertain, he starts with "1.68 (95% CI 1.56" but then puts the 95% CI for that lower bound of the interval, "95% CI 1.52," followed by the lower bound for that value, "95% CI 1.504," and so on. He goes 11 layers deep before resorting to an ellipsis.

Normally, there is not enough data to compute an error bar on error bars. The data being measured have a distribution, e.g. one might make ten measurements of something which come out to 1, 1, 1.1, 1, 1.4, 1, 1, 0.5, 1, and 1, suggesting it is probably close to 1, so there is a range of values that could likely be. However, properties such as the average and standard deviation do not themselves have ranges. If one is uncertain that one has computed these correctly, there is not enough data to compute one's own uncertainty in one's skills in any meaningful way; one can claim error bars on error bars, as in this example, but those are just guesses with no statistically useful backing.

==Transcript==
:[A line graph with eight marks on the Y-axis and five marks on the X-axis. The graph has four points represented by dots and connected by three lines between them. Each dot has error bars coming out of the top and bottom of it. The horizontal line delineating the end of each error bar has another set of smaller error bars attached to it. These second error bars in turn have a still smaller third set of error bars attached to the end of them. There is a final fourth set of very small error bars attached to the third set, for a total of 56 error bars]

:[Caption below the panels:]
:I don't know how to propagate error correctly, so I just put error bars on all my error bars.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Statistics]]
[[Category:Line graphs]]

2097: Thor Tools

2019-01-17T18:38:26Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 2097
| date = January 11, 2019
| title = Thor Tools
| image = thor_tools.png
| titletext = CORRECTION: After careful evaluation, we have determined that the axis label on this chart was printed backward.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by Thor. Add a list of the tools in the comic. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

In Norse mythology, {{w|Thor}} is the name of a god of thunder and lightning. His signature weapon is a magic hammer called {{w|Mjölnir}}. In popular culture Thor might be best known for his role in {{w|Thor (Marvel Comics)|Marvel comics and films}}, which his appearance here seems to be referencing. In the Marvel Cinematic Universe movie, Avengers: Infinity War, Thor also wields an axe named Stormbreaker.

Although this hammer was historically a weapon, this comic interprets it as it would more commonly be interpeted today -- as a tool. The comic is listing various hand tools in order of utility and viability as Thor's weapon, besides his actual, enchanted hammer. Hammers are heavy, blunt, and can do large amounts of damage to an opponent, whereas a hand plane is sharp, but only in one place, and will only inflict surface wounds.

Some of these tools require power, which would generally require Thor to stay near an outlet or keep a battery charging, such as the circular saw, or Dremel. However, being the god of lightning may allow him to circumvent this, by producing electricity for the direct current (D.C.) tools, although he would need an inverter to convert the lightning (D.C.) to alternating current (A.C.) for the tools requiring it. Thor would also need compressed air for the nail gun or jackhammer, only allowing Thor so many shots before reloading the air tank at an outlet, or via a concentrated wind storm.

The nail gun and staple gun would also require nails or staples respectively to function as a weapon. Although Mjölnir is believed to return to Thor if thrown, it's not clear how similar system could work with nails and staples.

The usefulness of the nail gun as a weapon might depend on whether it was an older one that can be bump-fired or a newer one that requires a separate trigger pull for each nail.

In the title text, [[Randall]] writes that the order of the axis label should be reversed, making the plane the best tool and Mjölnir the worst. Considering that the title of the comic is "Thor Tools" ("tools", instead of "weapons"), the argument seems to be that a hammer is less useful than the rest, by seeing them as tools and not as weapons.

A few other interpretations of this could be:
* Randall proposes that Thor armed with a plane or digital calipers would be much more fearsome than with a hammer.
* The "value" of the more strange-seeming items would be much higher than his traditional hammer, perhaps more gory or more humorous.
* Thor tends to cause collateral damage, and would cause less with a plane or calipers.
* "Best" and "worst" are to be interpreted for Thor's enemies rather than Thor himself.
* Randall might just find the idea of Thor wielding a Plane as a weapon to be really funny.

The title may be a reference to Gary Larson's ''The Far Side'' comic, ''Cow Tools''.

===List of tools===

All shown tools are explained below:
;Hammer
:A {{w|hammer}} ''is a tool consisting of a weighted "head" fixed to a long handle that is swung to deliver an impact to a small area of an object''. Thor was a hammer-wielding god and produced the lighting by using this tool. A {{w|war hammer}} was an actual blunt weapon used for combat in medieval times, and is the original Thor's attribute. There exists a variety of craftsman's hammers designed for specific purposes which can be used as weapons of opportunity to various degrees, depending on the tool's size, weight and material.
;Axe
:An {{w|axe}} or just ax is another old human tool used to split and cut wood, but it also was used as a dangerous weapon in the medieval times. The battle-axes of old were of considerably different design than the woodworking ones, being lighter and having thinner and wider blades. A woodworking axe, though not designed for combat, could be a formidable weapon of opportunity.
;Claw hammer
:A {{w|claw hammer}} is a hammer tool primarily used for driving nails into other objects, but also for pulling nails from them. This item seems a bit redundant in the presence of a general hammer on the axis, but could be seen as more scary because it has a pointed, curved and split back head (used for pulling nails). In fact, the usefulness of its back head for combat is debatable at least. On the other hand, it is smaller and lighter than some other craftman's hammers, and less scary than a true war hammer, so its place on the axis may be justified.
;Circular saw
:A {{w|circular saw}} is using a, mostly electric powered, fast-revolving toothed disc to cut materials. A stationary version is called a ''table saw'' but the figure of Thor drawn above presents him using a lighter hand-held version making a buzzing sound. Since the power of the saw is far beyond the human power it is quite a dangerous tool and could be fatal to the user himself. However, it would be rather unwieldy in combat, as it is quite heavy and bulky, and usually requires both hands to operate. Also, electric circular saw would be limited by its cord length, however cordless (battery-operated) saws exist today. This item could be a mock reference to a common trope in horror movies or computer games, when a {{w|chainsaw}} (not a circular saw) is used a weapon.
;Shovel
:A {{w|shovel}} is also a historic tool. It can be used to dig into the ground, move snow or dirt, harvest, and much more. Because it has a relatively thin, sharp metal blade at the end of a pole, it can be used as a weapon of opportunity. Indeed, a small (sometimes foldable), sturdy {{w|Entrenching tool|spade}} was and still is a standard issue item for an infantryman in some countries, intended mainly for entrenching work, but also usable as a weapon – and the soldiers are trained to use it as such, sometimes to a high skill, specifically among special forces. It is rumored that Russian Spetznaz operators are specifically trained to use their spades as throwing weapons. It is therefore more useful in combat than a circular saw – but may be seen as less scary.
;Jackhammer
:A {{w|jackhammer}} is a power tool used to drill and crush hard but brittle materials like stone, concrete etc. It has heavy body with a protruding shaft that makes hard and rapid back-and-forth (and optionally also rotary) movements that drive an implement (a drill, a chisel etc.) into the worked material. Like the circular saw jackhammer is a tool that is powered far beyond single human capabilities. Most jackhammers are very heavy and can be reasonably used only in a facing-down position to work on floors, pavements and other near-horizontal surfaces, nullifying combat application. However, since Thor is purportedly very strong, he may be able to hold it horizontally for some combat...
;Socket wrench
:A handle attached to a {{w|socket wrench}} is mostly used to tighten bolts or nuts. But since it is quite heavy and resembles a hammer it could also be used in a similar fashion. It may be a self-reference to [[538: Security|comic 538]].
;Bolt cutters
:{{w|Bolt cutters}} are cutters with very long handles, typically 2 or 3 feet long, and comparatively tiny jaws. The length of the handles provides the user enough mechanical advantage to sheer through things like bolts, chain links, and lock shackles. Although this tool can cut some fairly tough objects, its usefulness in combat is limited – as far as the cutting action goes at least. On the other hand they are quite heavy and can be used as a blunt weapon.
;Hacksaw
:A {{w|hacksaw}} is a type of hand saw with very small teeth. Hacksaws are well suited to cutting materials like metal and plastic, where the larger teeth of a wood saw would tend to bind or damage the material around the cut. Hacksaw blades are fairly unlikely to seriously injure people, though a hacksaw may be useful against metal baddies like Ultron.
;Nail gun
:A {{w|nail gun}} is a tool for driving nails or other fasteners into various materials ranging from soft wood to hard concrete by a single powerful "shot" to the nail being driven. There are models powered by compressed air, electricity (several types of mechanisms) or explosive charges similar to firearm ammunition (most often compatible with {{w|.22 Short}} blank cartridges). They are normally used by slightly pushing the "nozzle" against an object, disengaging a safety nose contact mechanism, and pulling the trigger. These are quite dangerous tools and can be potentially modified – by removing safety mechanisms – to act similarly to a handgun, shooting nails as high-speed projectiles. Its place in the middle of the axis seems not right compared to the work hazard level of other tools placed left of it. If safety mechanisms are left intact, a nail gun would need to be used in close combat by pressing it against an opponent which would make it difficult to apply, but if applied successfully it would inflict grievous wounds.
;Staple gun
: A {{w|staple gun}} is a tool used to drive {{w|Staple (fastener)|staples}} (C-shaped pieces of hard wire) into relatively soft materials such as wood, plastics and light masonry in order to fix something to them. There exist spring-loaded hand-operated staple guns as well as power ones utilizing either electricity or compressed air. The power discharged during staple action is a lot less than that of a nail gun and would inflict minor skin wounds at most. If one manages to eject a staple into the air (not against an object) it won't travel very far. A figure of Thor is drawn above the axis showing him using a staple gun this way, with staples falling short onto the ground. The gun held by Thor makes ''kachunk'' sounds characteristic for a spring-loaded version of the tool.
;Coping saw
: A {{w|coping saw}} is a hand saw with a thin replaceable blade and is used to cut curves and shapes in wood or other relatively soft materials. While it could produce a surface wound and draw blood, a person would generally not stand still long enough to be seriously hurt by being sawed at by a coping saw, plus they could bend or break the blade relatively easily.
;Screwdriver (flat)
:A (flat) {{w|screwdriver}} is a metal rod with a handle, flattened and ground at the other end to form a fairly sharp but short edge perpendicular to the rod. It is normally used to drive {{w|Screw|screws}} into a material, by putting the edge into a groove on the screw's head and turning it while pressing firmly. It is not very dangerous normally, but many people have cut their fingers while driving screws in, or sometimes [[1474: Screws|whilst using it incorrectly to unscrew a bolt]]. It could potentially be used as a stabbing weapon similarly to a dagger, but much less effectively, or alternatively the heavy handle may be used as a bludgeon, though the smooth rod would be difficult to grip. Some nations seem to regard it so much dangerous as to ban its possession in public along knives.
;Ball-peen hammer
: Like a regular hammer, a {{w|Ball-peen hammer|ball-peen hammer}} has a flat head designed to hammer things like nail. However instead of the "claw" a regular carpenter's hammer has to pull out nails, it has a second head that is shaped like a ball and which is used to bang surfaces such as sheet metal directly. A ball-peen hammer is probably the smallest of traditional hammers, and usually used for more delicate work. Thor's Hammer has two flat surfaces for pounding (no claw), so a ball peen might be like a smaller Thor's Hammer and could be pretty deadly in his hands. The ball part would probably not be any more or less effective than the flat part, except it might bounce or deflect off some surfaces where a flat one might not.
;Screwdriver (Phillips)
:Similar to a flat screwdriver, but with a cross-shaped tip, designed to drive screws with matching cross-shaped heads. While a Phillips screwdriver could potentially be used as an improvised weapon to stab or strike like a flat screwdriver, the blunter, cross shape is less likely to inflict cutting injury, likely leading to its lower position on the list.
;Awl
:An {{w|Stitching awl|awl}} is a hand tool, basically a rather short, thin, sharp (sometimes curved) spike with a handle. It is used for punching holes through soft material (leather, fabrics) or to {{w|Scratch awl|mark points}} or lines on wood or metal to assist further work such as cutting or drilling. In a pinch, it could be used as a stabbing weapon like a dagger, but a screwdriver is more sturdy for such purpose.
;Digital Caliper
:{{w|Digital calipers}} are an instrument for precisely measuring the dimensions of small objects. Typically, digital calipers can measure inner diameters, outer diameters, and depth. The reason they are considered more formidable than Dremels and planes is likely how surprisingly sharp the calipers are. They need to be sharp to make accurate measurements, but it is not uncommon for people to cut themselves while using a digital caliper.
;Dremel
:Dremel is a brand name (often used in a generic sense) of small {{w|Die grinder|rotary power tools}} that can be used in precise work involving small objects such as engraving, milling, drilling, grinding, cutting, polishing etc. It consists of a relatively small and lightweight body housing a high-speed electric motor driving a shaft equipped with a {{w|Chuck (engineering)|chuck}}. Various implements can be fixed to the chuck – drills, milling cutters of various shapes, small cutting disks, grinding stones, brushes, soft polishing disks etc. Typically the tool is used handheld against an object held in a vice. It can also be mounted in a stand with a {{w|flexible shaft}} attached, at the other end of which an implement is fixed in a chuck, allowing for still more precise work. A Dremel would be rather useless in combat, effecting in superficial wounds only. It could be seen as a baby circular saw, therefore much less scary and placed much more to the right of the scale. However, it is still a heavy object with a firm grip, and could plausibly be wielded as a bludgeon, making it slightly more effective than a plane.
;Plane
:A {{w|Plane_(tool)|hand plane}} is a tool for shaping wood using muscle power to force the cutting blade over the wood surface. It is designed to scrape layers of wood off the surface. While a plane does have a sharp edge and can cause painful injuries if misused, its awkward shape and the small size of the cutting edge would make it impractical to wield and nearly useless as a combat weapon, even for bludgeoning. A hand plane could plausibly be used as a particularly brutal ''torture'' device on a restrained victim, but as Thor is typically depicted as an honorable and heroic character it is unlikely that he would use one in this manner.

==Transcript==

:[A wide image is shown in a single frame.]
:Hand tools Thor could have ended up with
:[Below is a small centered horizontal line with arrows at both ends, labeled "Best" to the left and "Worst" on the right.]

:[The rest of the image shows an other horizontal line in the middle, also with arrows at both ends, covering the full width. Items are marked by a dot with a text above or below, and sometimes a figure wearing a winged helmet, above the line, uses a tool mentioned below:]
:Hammer
:Axe
:Claw hammer
:Circular saw
:[Above, the winged helmet guy uses a circular saw:]
:''Bzzzz zzzz''
:Shovel
:Jackhammer
:Socket wrench
:[Above, the winged helmet guy spins the socket of a socket wrench with a tiny sound.]
:Bolt cutters
:Hacksaw
:Nail gun
:Staple gun
:[Above, the winged helmet guy fires staples into the ground in front of him:]
:''Kachunk kachunk''
:Coping saw
:Screwdriver (flat)
:Ball-peen hammer
:Screwdriver (Phillips)
:Awl
:Digital Caliper
:Dremel
:[Above, the winged helmet guy shows a running Dremel to the left:]
:''Bzzzzz''
:Plane

{{comic discussion}}

2095: Marsiforming

2019-01-17T18:31:44Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 2095
| date = January 7, 2019
| title = Marsiforming
| image = marsiforming.png
| titletext = It has so many advantages--it preserves Martian life, requires fewer interplanetary launches, and makes it much easier to field-test Mars rovers.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a MARS ROVER IN MAZATLAN, MEXICO. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{w|Terraforming}} is the (so far only suggested) process of changing a planet, usually to make it more habitable for humans or other Earth life. A very common example is {{w|Mars}}, which is known to harbour water ice and believed to have previously been warm enough to have liquid water. Normally, plans for terraforming try to adjust temperatures to be compatible with liquid water, and an atmosphere containing significant amounts of oxygen but little carbon dioxide. The word {{w|Terra}} is the Latin name for {{w|Earth}}, so terraforming would be "Earth Forming".

In this comic [[Cueball]] is suggesting doing the opposite: change Earth to be more like Mars, i.e. extremely dry, cold, and with a very thin atmosphere, approximately 1/160 of Earth's surface pressure. In addition, Mars has no magnetic core, so it is possible that Cueball wants to remove the magnetic field from Earth. The comic title combines Mars with Forming (with a linking "i") to create the new word Marsiforming. He is having trouble getting the enthusiastic response to his proposal that he expects.

The title text provides examples of how this could improve things: preserving Martian life (a proposed reason to terraform Mars would be to provide a second planet to preserve Earth life at the cost of destroying any potential [undiscovered] Martian organisms, so by marsiforming Earth, we would provide a second planet to preserve Martian life, if there is any life on Mars), needing fewer interplanetary launches (no need to leave this planet's atmosphere in order to visit itself, and Martians who might otherwise need to return to their home planet could instead settle on Earth), and making it easier to field-test Mars rovers (field-test means to test in the environment of actual use, which would readily be available on Earth).

Unstated in the comic are the extreme costs such a proposal would incur, which would surely be grounds for rejection. Between the thin atmosphere, harsh solar radiation, and other changes, Earth would become uninhabitable for most life currently on Earth, most notably humans. Almost all humans value the continued existence of the human race far more than Martian exploration (if nothing else, it is for the benefit of humans that Mars is being explored, so exterminating the human race would render the benefits moot).

There are known extremophile species that would survive underground on Mars. If similar life is hiding on Mars, marsiforming the Earth would benefit their possible eventual interplanetary efforts. There is an existing project to begin experimental terraforming on Mars by nurturing some of our extremophile species on it.{{w|Terraforming_of_Mars#Funded_research:_ecopoiesis}}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:[Cueball is on a stage giving a presentation, with a diagram behind him. The diagram shows Earth and Mars side-by-side, along with some writing below the two.]
:Cueball: Earth and Mars may look different now, but with some orbiting mirrors and atmospheric adjustments, we could change that.

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I'm having trouble selling people on my proposal to terraform Earth to resemble Mars.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Space]]

2087: Rocket Launch

2018-12-19T22:40:21Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 2087
| date = December 19, 2018
| title = Rocket Launch
| image = rocket_launch.png
| titletext = NASA tries to coordinate launch timing with the Care Bears' cloud castle, but unfortunately sometimes collisions with stray Care Bears are unavoidable, so they just try to make the fairings sturdy and hope for a glancing impact.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a CARE BEAR STARE. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic was posted on a week with a notably high number of rocket launches. Originally, there were to be four orbital rocket launches from the US on December 19, 2018, which would have tied with the prior record for number of orbital rocket launches in one day. While these launches were ultimately delayed, breaking the event, the comic was doubtless under production by then.

Only some of the steps listed are actually typical.

* Liftoff: the traditional start of a launch, when the rocket leaves the ground. The engines will typically have been ignited a short time before, but need to throttle up to produce enough thrust to overcome the rocket's weight. "Liftoff" refers to the moment this happens, making the rocket lift off the ground.
* Max-Q: Peak aerodynamic stress. A rocket accelerates from the moment it leaves the ground. The faster a rocket goes, the more air it pushes through per second - but the higher a rocket goes, the less air there is to push through. (Before liftoff, the rocket is not moving, and thus is not pushing through air. Once in orbit, there is essentially no air to push through, so the rocket is not pushing through air. Between those two times, the rocket is pushing through some amount of air, the exact amount increasing before Max Q and decreasing after Max Q.) "Max Q" is the moment where these two factors produce a maximum, and is the point where the rocket's structure must withstand the most air pushing back against it.
* Booster separation: rockets are designed in stages, so they do not have to carry the empty fuel tanks all the way to orbit. (Carrying any mass to orbit is expensive, so the more that can be dropped off earlier, the better.) 3 stages is typical. "Booster separation" marks the point where the first of these stages (the "booster"), its fuel expended, is typically ejected.
* Max-CB: Highest chance of collision with Care Bears. This is entirely fictitious. Care Bears are cartoon characters. There are no known instances where a rocket has collided with a cartoon.
* Main stage separation: see "booster separation" above. This marks the point where the second stage (the "main stage") is ejected.
* GPS silenced so it will stop saying "Make a U-turn". Again, this is fictional. While some rockets do make use of signals from the Global Positioning System ("GPS"), no rockets are known to use the navigational devices that incorporate GPS readers and street maps, providing directions - often with optional text-to-speech - along the Earth's surface. Some such devices are notorious for getting confused in extreme situations (such as the high Mach numbers that rockets achieve); constantly uttering "make a U-turn" would be one such confusion, and any device in such a confused state might well be silenced for being more annoying than helpful. Navigation of this nature is neither necessary nor useful on a rocket, which will have its entire route from ground to orbit computed before launch, and piloting typically left entirely to computers given the precise timing required.
* Reunification (of boosters): another fictional step. Discarded stages fall back into the Earth's atmosphere, either hitting the ground (or, more often, water) or burning up from the friction of falling at extreme speed. The booster and main stage would not be on a course to come anywhere near each other, and would not have enough fuel to change their course (running out of fuel being why they were discarded in the first place). Even if they did, landing for reuse (as SpaceX has attempted, sometimes successfully) would be far more likely than a mid-air reunion.
* Pilot panics, copilot takes command after struggle: another fictional step. Astronauts are not the sort of people who panic easily, nor struggle with their crewmates. More importantly, in any modern rocket the "pilot" is not a human being, but a computer incapable of panic (as in the human emotion). It is possible that part of the flight computer could fail, causing redundant failsafes to take over, but the process could not correctly be described as a "struggle", and in any case this sort of failure is uncommon enough that it is not part of a "typical" rocket launch.
* Pursuit Phase: fictional. This assumes the (nonexistent) reunified booster would have enough fuel to pursue the top stage of the rocket, and a reason to do so. See "Reunification".
* Inter-stage dogfight: fictional. See "Pursuit Phase". This at least provides a potential motive.
* Winner proceeds to space: fictional. As noted above, in a real rocket launch there is no dogfight for there to be a "winner" of. A kind reading would note that the top stage "wins" by default, and it is certainly the case that in a real (orbital) rocket launch, the top stage typically does proceed to space.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{comic discussion}}

2058: Rock Wall

2018-10-16T18:50:52Z

WingedCat:

{{comic
| number = 2058
| date = October 12, 2018
| title = Rock Wall
| image = rock_wall.png
| titletext = I don't trust mantle/core geologists because I suspect that, if they ever get a chance to peel away the Earth's crust, they'll do it in a heartbeat.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Please edit the explanation below and only mention here why it isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{w|Mantle_(geology)|Mantle}} {{w|geologists}} study that {{w|Structure_of_the_Earth|part of the planet}} that's below the top "{{w|Crust_(geology)|crust}}" of the planet. The top layer of the planet, which is several dozen miles thick, is the only layer we've been able to explore, by {{w|mining|digging tunnels}}, {{w|spelunking}}, etc. The only way to study the mantle and other inner layers of the earth are through non-visual, non-tactile, indirect methods, and by analyzing old samples of the mantle that have made their way to the surface.

In this comic, [[Ponytail]], talking to [[Megan]], is describing her job as a mantle geologist as that of living on one side of a thick wall that is, and likely always will be, impossible to get around, but she has to study what is on the other side of the wall. In this case the wall is horizontal rather than vertical, the wall being the earth's crust, and makes a complete sphere, so the only way to get past the wall would be to go through. It is theoretically possible to go through, but as of the comic's posting, humanity is far from doing so. (The deepest hole dug as of at that time, as measured by {{w|true vertical depth}}, is the {{w|Kola_Superdeep_Borehole|Kola Borehole}}, which only goes down to 12,262 metres out of the estimated 35,000 meters needed to get through at that location.)

In the title text [[Randall]] states that he doesn't trust mantle/core geologists. Because if they got the chance he believes they would not hesitate (even a heart beat) in stripping away Earth's crust to study the mantle or even worse the {{w|Inner core|core}} directly. Of course if they only did this locally to look at the mantle it would not shatter the Earth although that local area may become a volcano. But if they actually peeled the entire outer layer away, we humans would have no place to live, as the mantle is really hot and would melt easily (producing magmas and therefore lavas when magma’s exposed to surface, see title text of [[1405: Meteor]] to be more confused). However, after a while all these erupted lavas would solidify and become a new crust. Humanity needs to withstand just some millennia of active worldwide volcanism.

If they somehow exposed the core even locally something weird would be bound to happen.

But Randall is afraid that their craving to get around that 20 mile wall would prevent the researchers from even hesitating if they did get that chance. Fortunately, we can study planetary cores in the solar system without stripping Earth's surface by visiting an asteroid which is thought to be the exposed iron core of a protoplanet. The [https://www.llnl.gov/news/lab-instrument-will-explore-asteroid-psyche Psyche mission] is scheduled to launch in 2023 and arrive at {{w|16 Psyche}} in 2030.

This comics seems to be a spin-off from the previous comic [[2057: Internal Monologues]], where Randall tried to find some interesting monologues from scientist from different research fields. Maybe he did not find an internal monologue he liked for geologists, but ended up with this idea instead. Thinking about the core or mantle, lava and Magma seems to be something Randall does a lot, and thus he must have some ideas about how a geologist would think, which was why this comic [[913: Core]], was also referenced in the previous comic as something geologist might have internal monologues about.

==Transcript==
:[Ponytail is gesturing towards Megan with her hand, while talking to her.]
:Ponytail: I live next to a wall of rock 20 miles thick. There's no way around or over it. I'm trapped on this side forever.
:Ponytail: I study the stuff on the other side.

:[Caption below the frame:]
:Mantle geology seems like the most frustrating field.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Science]]

2058: Rock Wall

2018-10-16T18:50:37Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */ A comment on drililng through.

{{comic
| number = 2058
| date = October 12, 2018
| title = Rock Wall
| image = rock_wall.png
| titletext = I don't trust mantle/core geologists because I suspect that, if they ever get a chance to peel away the Earth's crust, they'll do it in a heartbeat.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Please edit the explanation below and only mention here why it isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{w|Mantle_(geology)|Mantle}} {{w|geologists}} study that {{w|Structure_of_the_Earth|part of the planet}} that's below the top "{{w|Crust_(geology)|crust}}" of the planet. The top layer of the planet, which is several dozen miles thick, is the only layer we've been able to explore, by {{w|mining|digging tunnels}}, {{w|spelunking}}, etc. The only way to study the mantle and other inner layers of the earth are through non-visual, non-tactile, indirect methods, and by analyzing old samples of the mantle that have made their way to the surface.

In this comic, [[Ponytail]], talking to [[Megan]], is describing her job as a mantle geologist as that of living on one side of a thick wall that is, and likely always will be, impossible to get around, but she has to study what is on the other side of the wall. In this case the wall is horizontal rather than vertical, the wall being the earth's crust, and makes a complete sphere, so the only way to get past the wall would be to go through. It is theoretically possible to go through, but as of the comic's posting, humanity is far from doing so. (The deepest hole dug as of at that time, as measured by {[w|true vertical depth}}, is the {{w|Kola_Superdeep_Borehole|Kola Borehole}}, which only goes down to 12,262 metres out of the estimated 35,000 meters needed to get through at that location.)

In the title text [[Randall]] states that he doesn't trust mantle/core geologists. Because if they got the chance he believes they would not hesitate (even a heart beat) in stripping away Earth's crust to study the mantle or even worse the {{w|Inner core|core}} directly. Of course if they only did this locally to look at the mantle it would not shatter the Earth although that local area may become a volcano. But if they actually peeled the entire outer layer away, we humans would have no place to live, as the mantle is really hot and would melt easily (producing magmas and therefore lavas when magma’s exposed to surface, see title text of [[1405: Meteor]] to be more confused). However, after a while all these erupted lavas would solidify and become a new crust. Humanity needs to withstand just some millennia of active worldwide volcanism.

If they somehow exposed the core even locally something weird would be bound to happen.

But Randall is afraid that their craving to get around that 20 mile wall would prevent the researchers from even hesitating if they did get that chance. Fortunately, we can study planetary cores in the solar system without stripping Earth's surface by visiting an asteroid which is thought to be the exposed iron core of a protoplanet. The [https://www.llnl.gov/news/lab-instrument-will-explore-asteroid-psyche Psyche mission] is scheduled to launch in 2023 and arrive at {{w|16 Psyche}} in 2030.

This comics seems to be a spin-off from the previous comic [[2057: Internal Monologues]], where Randall tried to find some interesting monologues from scientist from different research fields. Maybe he did not find an internal monologue he liked for geologists, but ended up with this idea instead. Thinking about the core or mantle, lava and Magma seems to be something Randall does a lot, and thus he must have some ideas about how a geologist would think, which was why this comic [[913: Core]], was also referenced in the previous comic as something geologist might have internal monologues about.

==Transcript==
:[Ponytail is gesturing towards Megan with her hand, while talking to her.]
:Ponytail: I live next to a wall of rock 20 miles thick. There's no way around or over it. I'm trapped on this side forever.
:Ponytail: I study the stuff on the other side.

:[Caption below the frame:]
:Mantle geology seems like the most frustrating field.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Science]]

Talk:2009: Hertzsprung-Russell Diagram

2018-06-27T21:12:08Z

WingedCat:

How the heck is a lava cake more luminous than a campfire? {{unsigned ip|108.162.219.28}}
:It's Lava '''Lake''', as in a large puddle of lava.[[User:Cgrimes85|Cgrimes85]] ([[User talk:Cgrimes85|talk]]) 15:45, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
:: Now the real question is, Why isn't lava cake included on the diagram?!?! [[User:Veleek|Veleek]] ([[User talk:Veleek|talk]]) 23:54, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
::: It would be to the left and below the astronomer. While it is hotter (at least when it comes out of the oven), the cake is a better insulator than the human, so doesn't dump as much heat, even though it is hotter. [[User:Nutster|Nutster]] ([[User talk:Nutster|talk]]) 13:15, 22 June 2018 (UTC)
:This is the best misreading that I've seen in a while! [[User:Quantum7|Quantum7]] ([[User talk:Quantum7|talk]]) 07:56, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

As it's a logarithmic scale, is it more correct to say the plot been expanded to 1 on both axes? [[User:Cgrimes85|Cgrimes85]] ([[User talk:Cgrimes85|talk]]) 15:47, 20 June 2018 (UTC)

It seems Randall thinks an astronomer is about as bright as a light bulb, probably due to the Hertzsprung-Russell diagram itself! [[User:Ianrbibtitlht|Ianrbibtitlht]] ([[User talk:Ianrbibtitlht|talk]]) 15:52, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
:A daily food consumption of average human is about 100W when spread out over 24 hours {{unsigned ip|172.68.245.169}}
::It might actually be about that bright, but in the infrared spectrum. http://elte.prompt.hu/sites/default/files/tananyagok/InfraredAstronomy/ch01s04.html [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.89|108.162.246.89]] 20:54, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
:But they are no where near as hot!
[[Special:Contributions/172.69.198.10|172.69.198.10]] 20:57, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
::You seem to overestimate the attractiveness of most lightbulbs. I've only seen a few that I would consider really hot. {{unsigned ip|162.158.107.37}}
:::And size; Remember that this type of chart is for comparing total luminosity to surface temperature, & although light bulbs get hot, they're usually nowhere near the surface area of an astronomer.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

While wattage is used as an informal proxy for bulb brightness, there is not a 1-to-1 relationship between power consumption and light output. Incandescent bulbs in the United States were commonly labeled with both watts consumed and lumens output to aid consumers in choosing efficient bulbs. {{unsigned ip|172.69.90.40}}
:"Were"? When? These days the lamp itself usually only states volts & watts, & you're lucky if even the box states lumens. My personal least-favorite is "60w equivalent" with no color temperature & no luminosity listed.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

{{w|Ivanpah Solar Power Facility|Ivanpah}} doesn't have a salt tank. Presumably he meant the boiler, and/or was confusing it with {{w|Crescent Dunes Solar Energy Project|Crescent Dunes}}.
[[User:Wwoods|Wwoods]] ([[User talk:Wwoods|talk]]) 17:29, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
:Thank you! That had me scratching my head. I bet he was thinking of Crescent Dunes. Should this be noted in the Explanation?[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

I understand the explanation, but what's the joke? {{unsigned ip|198.41.230.124}}

The title text says "The Hertzsprung-Russell diagram is located in its own lower right corner, unless you're viewing it on an unusually big screen." But it's clearly on the top left corner... Am I missing something? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.106|108.162.219.106]] 18:47, 20 June 2018 (UTC)

:Why would it be at the top left...? The diagram itself is not particularly luminous, so would not be at the top, and its apparent temperature is quite low, so it would not be on the left. {{unsigned ip|108.162.212.89}}

::The joke is that while these type of graphs are typically used for illustrating the output of stars in relation to their age; Randall has extended its range to apply it to planets, boats, whales, & astronomers. Most items in the lower right are neither very luminous (compared to the total luminosity of a star) nor very hot (as compared to a star) & certainly their output on either scale does not bear a reliable correlation to their age. Randall is once again weighing things with the wrong measuring stick, so to speak.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

:::Adding to this, the title text is joking that if you were to measure the diagram's luminosity and effective temperature, then place a point representing that on a copy of the diagram, the resulting point would be in the copy's lower right corner. This type of joke is similar to the one in 688: Self-Description. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.34.28|172.68.34.28]] 05:07, 23 June 2018 (UTC)

Why is a blue whale considered more luminous than a campfire? Blue whales don't generate any light. {{unsigned ip|108.162.212.89}}
:It would if your took it out of the water (to reduce convective losses), but it would emit in the infrared. The 78 kW cited here would equate to 588 million kcal of krill per year. That's in the ballpark of other estimates I found (e.g. 490 million[https://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/columns/straight-dope/article/13041278/straight-dope-does-the-average-american-use-more-energy-than]). I agree that this is one of the more surprising facts to find on this chart. --[[User:Quantum7|Quantum7]] ([[User talk:Quantum7|talk]]) 08:10, 21 June 2018 (UTC)
:: Size counts for a lot of that. By ounce, a campfire would be hotter, but these graphs go by total, not per-ton of mass.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

In one of the interesting parts of this diagram not that many mundane objects (or at least smaller than earth objects) are much hotter than most stars (surface temperature)... Not mentioned now.--[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 20:33, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
:I'm beginning to think the Explanation should highlight the fact that these graphs go by total output, not output per kilogram or anything relative like that. Body temperature of a blue-whale is almost certainly higher than the average temperature of a cruise ship, but a cruise ship is *much* bigger, thereby almost certainly outputting more heat. That said, I'm pretty sure these charts are only supposed to go by ''surface'' thermal output, which could throw a lot of these listings way off. Anyone know what the ''surface'' temperature of a blue-whale is? I've never seen one shown in infrared.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

I think the current explanation is still taking some of the graph too literally, thereby missing some of the jokes. After all, Randall creates comics, sometimes using innuendo or subtlety to make a point. I still think some of the items on the graph are plotted using luminosity as a measure of "brightness" in the sense of smartness. No offense intended, but he must have had a reason for including France below the planets and the blue whale above the astronomer. Furthermore, the title text is likely talking about the actual HR diagram not being very "bright" in the same way the astronomer is in the lower-right corner of the graph, except when it is displayed on a jumbotron. If you're an astronomer, you might not like hearing this, but the meaning of the HR diagram is difficult to grasp correctly. To leave out any mention of smartness is likely missing the most significant jokes in the comic. Please feel free to disagree, but remember it's still just a comic! [[User:Ianrbibtitlht|Ianrbibtitlht]] ([[User talk:Ianrbibtitlht|talk]]) 00:37, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

: More specifically to my point, this part of the explanation
:: "the title text notes that the screen displaying the diagram would probably be plotted..."
: is not correct. The title text states the diagram itself would probably be plotted in the lower-right corner, not the screen displaying it - the screen was only related to the second part of the title text! This IS the primary joke in the comic and likely why Randall is making fun of it in the first place. This is also likely the reason for the astronomer to ALSO be plotted in this corner - I doubt that is just a coincidence. Maybe Randall was too subtle for his point to get through to readers! [[User:Ianrbibtitlht|Ianrbibtitlht]] ([[User talk:Ianrbibtitlht|talk]]) 04:37, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

:: I noticed that too. I've added it to the explanation. The diagram itself doesn't have either of the properties measured in the diagram, though a screen displaying the diagram would. As that is an easy misreading to make, and the literal reading makes no sense, one can assume that technical misreading is what was meant.[[User:WingedCat|WingedCat]] ([[User talk:WingedCat|talk]]) 21:12, 27 June 2018 (UTC)

: Just in case I'm also being too subtle, I think Randall is saying that the HR diagram is neat to look at (as in really cool) but also stupid (as in not very bright), putting it in the lower-right corner of itself (cool and dim)! There, I said it! [[User:Ianrbibtitlht|Ianrbibtitlht]] ([[User talk:Ianrbibtitlht|talk]]) 04:45, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

::I believe it is definitely about total luminosity & thermal output, ''not'' "brightness" as a measure of intelligence. France is below the planets because it has much less total surface area & thereby less luminosity than the planet itself. If the graph listed by average luminosity per square inch, France would be higher than Earth. There is no joke about intelligence here, only that total luminosity & total heat output are not reliably linked to the age of non-stellar scale objects.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

:::I will concede on the question of intelligence related to objects on the diagram, as various comments have clarified each such object. Note that the detail on Venus needs to be fixed per another comment here suggesting it's not an error, and I'm pretty sure Randall meant Europa rather than mistyping Europe, so that should be removed from the explanation too. However, the title text explanation is still wrong - it is not about the display of the diagram but the diagram itself. This needs to be addressed! [[User:Ianrbibtitlht|Ianrbibtitlht]] ([[User talk:Ianrbibtitlht|talk]]) 01:44, 22 June 2018 (UTC)

How come this diagram says an LED bulb is hotter than a lightbulb, and both are hotter than a campfire? That doesn't seem right. [[User:YM Industries|YM Industries]] ([[User talk:YM Industries|talk]]) 01:49, 21 June 2018 (UTC)
:The confusion is coming from the fact that the arrow at the top is pointing toward lower temperatures. I'm not sure if this is intentional, or if it is a mistake, but seems to be confusing a lot of people (including myself until I read the actual numbers)[[User:Probably not Douglas Hofstadter|Probably not Douglas Hofstadter]] ([[User talk:Probably not Douglas Hofstadter|talk]]) 03:09, 21 June 2018 (UTC)
:: I noticed that the arrow was pointing in a confusing direction, but LED bulb is to the left of the campfire. The diagram clearly says it's hotter. I'm very confused by this comic. [[User:YM Industries|YM Industries]] ([[User talk:YM Industries|talk]]) 05:22, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

: The location of the LED and Lightbulb temperatures may be related to the actual light source points of these objects (diode junction and wire filament) rather than the outer shells that we can touch. I don't know enough about their internal temperatures to say for sure, but that might explain their positions. [[User:Ianrbibtitlht|Ianrbibtitlht]] ([[User talk:Ianrbibtitlht|talk]]) 05:05, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

:Worked it out, it's referring to the colour temperature. [[User:YM Industries|YM Industries]] ([[User talk:YM Industries|talk]]) 05:24, 21 June 2018 (UTC)
::Right. The color temperature of an LED bulb can be much higher than a blackbody of the same power and area because it emits in only a small spectral region.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.238.47|108.162.238.47]] 05:32, 21 June 2018 (UTC)
:::'''''A pun! That's another joke; Should definitely be noted in the transcript.''''' Also, if he ''were'' referring to internal temperatures, not surface temperatures, it would be the only place in this chart he seems to have done so. The other listings are consistent with surface temperatures, not average internal temps.[[User:ProphetZarquon|ProphetZarquon]] ([[User talk:ProphetZarquon|talk]]) 14:25, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

I'm pretty sure there shouldn't be a table in the transcript? I've moved it, but now the table needs to be filled and the transcript needs some work. [[User:Herobrine|Herobrine]] ([[User talk:Herobrine|talk]]) 03:10, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

Venus' temperature is correct. Randall is using planetary equilibrium temperature https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planetary_equilibrium_temperature [[User:Astronorn|Astronorn]] ([[User talk:Astronorn|talk]]) 04:56, 21 June 2018 (UTC)

Seriously, can we get a mention that this graph relates to ''total'' output by surface area, not relative output by mass or anything like that? Obviously per square inch, a campfire is much more luminous than a whale, but the whale gives off more radiation in total due to its greater surface area. The distinction seems to be a source of confusion to a lot of people. {{unsigned|ProphetZarquon}}

The France entry might relate to the fact that our commune here in France (Pessac, 33) now turns off its streetlights between 0100-0500; and there are many communes that do the same or use more sophisticated schemes, like motion sensors or partial extinction, and turning off lighted signage for shops, etc.. [[User:BeeVee|BeeVee]] ([[User talk:BeeVee|talk]]) 14:48, 21 June 2018 (UTC)
:If so, '''that might be another joke''': If the graph went by lumens per area of surface, ''any'' marginally developed country would be shown ''higher'' (with more light output per area) than the Earth as a whole (yes, even countries turning off most of their lights at night), ''because'' '''''oceans'''''. On the other hand, with the graph the way it ''is'' shown, even comparing France to another region of roughly equal area & average reported surface temperature it would be difficult to discern whether its placement on this graph is any higher or lower due to switching the streetlights off at night; Most populous regions of comparable area are probably well within one order of magnitude in terms of light output (citation needed?), so any two comparable regions would be within about one pixel of each other. Listing France next to a comparable region doesn't help, but ''not listing anywhere else'' actually hints at the issue in question (turning off lights)! {{unsigned|ProphetZarquon}}

;Missing Next and Last buttons?
As I type this, an entry for comic 2010 exists, but the Next and Last buttons on 2009 don't exist. I've refreshed a bunch and also confirmed in Incognito and a different browser. So not a cache issue on my end. [[User:Davidgro|davidgro]] ([[User talk:Davidgro|talk]]) 23:07, 22 June 2018 (UTC)
:Must be a cache issue; maybe on the server. I can't reproduce this. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 10:51, 23 June 2018 (UTC)

;It's possible that the title text refers to the overall temperature of the chart, in which case if you had a big enough screen, the chart would show temperatures lower than the chart itself is at.[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.133|173.245.52.133]] 19:00, 26 June 2018 (UTC)

2009: Hertzsprung-Russell Diagram

2018-06-27T21:07:37Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2009
| date = June 20, 2018
| title = Hertzsprung-Russell Diagram
| image = hertzsprung_russell_diagram.png
| titletext = The Hertzsprung-Russell diagram is located in its own lower right corner, unless you're viewing it on an unusually big screen.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Fill out the table. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

The {{w|Hertzsprung–Russell diagram}} is a scatterplot showing absolute luminosities of stars against its effective temperature or color. It's generally used to understand a star's age.

The axes are labeled in {{w|Kelvin}} (degrees {{w|Celsius}} above {{w|absolute zero}}) for {{w|effective temperature}} and, unlike many Hertzsprung–Russell diagrams, {{w|Watts}} for {{w|luminosity}}. While most Hertzsprung–Russell diagrams are labelled in units of {{w|solar luminosity}} or {{w|absolute magnitude}}, all three are perfectly valid measures of {{w|luminosity}}, which refers to the total power emitted by the star (or other body). {{w|Effective temperature}} refers to temperature of a blackbody with the same surface area and luminosity. This is meant to provide an estimate of the surface temperature of the object.

Regular Hertzsprung–Russell diagrams cover ranges of about 1,000K to 30,000K, and what is labeled on this diagram as 1021 to 1033 watts—i.e. the upper-left corner. Extended diagrams increase the luminosity range only to include the "Brown Dwarfs". This diagram has been extended to much lower magnitudes on both axes. The joke comes from the absurdity of a diagram meant for stars including much smaller objects, such as planets ... and astronomers.

Though not included in the diagram, the title text notes that the diagram itself would probably be plotted somewhere in the lower right corner due to its (relatively) low power output and temperature. On its face this is nonsensical - the diagram itself, being mere information, possesses neither power output nor temperature - but one can read this as the power output and temperature of a typical screen displaying the diagram. Bigger screens have a higher total output (in terms of luminosity) and are thus positioned further towards the diagram's top. An "unusually big screen" would have to be something like a JumboTron or a projector for its luminosity or temperature to put it outside of the lower right corner.

==Table==

{| class="wikitable"
!style="width:10%"|Item
!style="width:10%"|Effective Temperature
!style="width:10%"|Luminosity
!style="width:70%"|Explanation
|-
|{{w|Betelgeuse}}
|3200 K
|1.6 * 1031 W
|
|-
|{{w|Vega}}
|10,000 K
|1.8 * 1028 W
|
|-
|{{w|Sun}}
|5800 K
|3.6 * 1026 W
|
|-
|{{w|Proxima Centauri}}
|2700 K
|2.0 * 1023 W
|
|-
|{{w|HD 189733 b}}
|2100 K
|4.8 * 1021 W
|
|-
|Interior of a {{w|Thermonuclear weapon|hydrogen bomb}} during detonation
|~108 K
|~1020 W
|
|-
|{{w|Jupiter}}
|285 K
|1.2 * 1018 W
|
|-
|{{w|Venus}}
|330 K
|5.0 * 1017 W
|It appears that this might have been misplaced on the temperature axis, being far too closely placed to France and to Earth. In fact Venus is at 735K where Earth has a mean of 287K.
|-
|{{w|Earth}}
|300 K
|3.0 * 1017 W
|
|-
|{{w|Mars}}
|255 K
|2.0 * 1016 W
|
|-
|{{w|Moon}}
|300 K
|1.2 * 1016 W
|
|-
|Nuclear Fireball
|8000 K
|2.0 * 1014 W
|
|-
|{{w|France}}
|300 K
|2.0 * 1014 W
|This is part of Earth (and more precisely a part of Europe), the same temperature as Earth, but less luminous in proportion to its surface area. Including this may be a joke referencing the two possible meanings of ‘Europa’ (see the next entry). [https://goo.gl/images/H8Dmu3 France emits less light at night than neighbouring countries], perhaps due to lower population density.
|-
|{{w|Europa (moon)|Europa}}
|90 K
|3.5 * 1014 W
|While this term could refer to Europe (a part of Earth, of which France (the previous entry) is a further part), the temperature and luminosity are both too small for that, so it must refer to the moon of Jupiter instead.
|-
|Lightning Bolt
|30,000 K
|30 GW
|
|-
|{{w|Ivanpah Solar Power Facility|Ivanpah Solar Plant}} Salt Tank
|1200 K
|1.2 GW
|The [[wikipedia:Ivanpah_Solar_Power_Facility|Ivanpah Solar Power Facility]] is a large solar power generator in the Californian Mojave desert. It concentrates sunlight from 173,500 reflectors onto three water-boiler towers. Randall appears to have mistakenly confused this power plant with the nearby Crescent Dunes, which uses tanks of molten salt to store energy. https://insideclimatenews.org/news/16012018/csp-concentrated-solar-molten-salt-storage-24-hour-renewable-energy-crescent-dunes-nevada
|-
|Medium-sized Lava Lake
|800 K
|32 MW
|
|-
|Cruise Ship
|325 K
|30 MW
|
|-
|Campfire
|870 K
|7.0 kW
|
|-
|{{w|Blue whale}}
|280 K
|78 kW
|Must be average surface temperature as whales are warm-blooded @ ~100F/37C internally, interestingly this and the cruise ship may be the only entries where a significant amount of power produced is conducted away rather than radiated. Also the power seems high compared to what I can find. [https://www.researchgate.net/publication/321972840/figure/fig1/AS:574004013604864@1513864629274/Visible-and-infrared-spectrum-images-of-various-humpback-whale-surfacing-features.png These images] suggest a surface temperature around 295K - 300K for a Humpback whale when surfacing
|-
|{{w|Arc lamp}}
|65,000 K
|150 W
|
|-
|Lightbulb
|4800 K
|75 W
|The temperature value here refers to colour temperature, which for an incandescent bulb is the same as the filament temperature. However tungsten filament lights, commonly referred to as "bulbs", have a colour temperature of between 2400 and 3600 K.
|-
|LED Bulb
|5800 K
|8 W
|The temperature value here refers to colour temperature, not physical temperature. Color temperature is a better match to effective temperature than physical temperature.
|-
|Astronomer
|310 K
|100 W
| The body temperature of a human (astronomer or otherwise) is about 310K (37°C). Skin Surface Temperature (which would fit the meaning of effective temperature better) is typically 31°C - 35°C. An astronomer standing outside in a thick coat on a cold night would have a much lower surface temperature.

A human being generating 100W for 24 hours needs 2065 kcal or 8,64 MJ. According to the UN FAO this is e.g. the typical daily energy output of women with weight 55kg between 18 and 59 years having a light activity lifestyle of 1.55xBMR (basic metabolic rate).

|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:Expanded Hertzsprung-Russell Diagram
:[A scatter plot is shown, with the x-axis labeled Effective Temperature (in kelvins), and the y-axis Luminosity (watts).]
:

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Scatter plots]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]

2006: Customer Rewards

2018-06-27T21:03:00Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2006
| date = June 13, 2018
| title = Customer Rewards
| image = customer_rewards.png
| titletext = We'll pay you $1.47 to post on social media about our products, $2.05 to mention it in any group chats you're in, and 11 cents per passenger each time you drive your office carpool past one of our billboards.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Going to need to fill out the explanations in the table...Also, the explanation needs to be expanded.}}

Many supermarkets offer customers {{w|Loyalty program|Loyalty programs}} that give discounts. To join one of these programs you often need to give various personal data, such as your name, or download an app that can access your {{w|Facebook}} account. The supermarket gets lots of valuable marketing data, and this is why it is able to offer a discount to members of the program.

This comic imagines the exchange of data for a discount as the sales clerk offering cash at the point of sale, to emphasize how odd this exchange is. Not to mention, when flat-out asking to see someone's phone to write down their contact info and look at all their Facebook posts it sounds disturbingly like uncouth data harvesting, not too far removed from potential identity theft.

The title text continues this by considering how companies will also find ways to incentivize positive viral marketing or offer services in exchange for viewing adverts. By imagining these situations as if they were cash transactions makes them seem ridiculous.

{| class="wikitable"
!style="width:15%"|Amount
!style="width:20%"|Reward offers
!style="width:65%"|Explanation
|-
|24¢
|Last name
|Possibly used to gather additional data from Facebook or to guess the customer's ethnicity
|-
|35¢
|List of family members
|So that the merchant can send them targeted advertisements
|-
|79¢
|Cell number
|So that the merchant can send you targeted advertisements
|-
|$1.20
|Facebook posts
|So that the merchant can see what you're interested in and tailor advertisements to you
|-
|$1.47
|Post products on social media
|Paying the customer to create advertisements for them
|-
|$2.05
|Mention products in group chats
|Movie and television studios get kickbacks from companies when products are mentioned or used in media
|-
|11¢
|Per passenger when driving past billboard in office carpool
|Like putting the store's ads on your website, blog, or podcast

|}

All the items except the last come to $6.10, meaning the customer would need to pick up the last item 154 times in order to incur a profit on this set of transactions, not including cost of transportation. (Perhaps driving 7 passengers past 22 billboards, or past the same billboard 22 times.) Presumably there would be limits to prevent the customer from gaming the system like this.

==Transcript==
:[To the right Cueball stands in front of a sales desk, his shopping bag on the desk. Behind the desk on the left is a sales clerk wearing a peaked cap and typing on a cash register.]
:Sales clerk: That will be $23.03.
:Sales clerk: Also, I'll pay you 24 cents for your last name, 35 cents for a list of your family members, 79 cents for your cell number, and $1.20 if you hand me your phone and let me scroll through your Facebook posts.

:[Caption below the panel:]
:Loyalty cards and rewards account offers get way weirder if you think of them as separate transactions.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Characters with Hats]]

Talk:1962: Generations

2018-03-02T22:49:19Z

WingedCat:

Table guy! Maybe this could be a table with "Year", "Generation Name", "References" and "Speculation". Or something. [[Special:Contributions/198.41.230.172|198.41.230.172]] 17:31, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

The highlighted generations are clearly the ones Pew Research named, but I can't figure out why Randall's numbers don't seem to match Pew's here: http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/05/11/millennials-surpass-gen-xers-as-the-largest-generation-in-u-s-labor-force/ft_15-05-11_millennialsdefined/ [[User:TheAnvil|TheAnvil]] ([[User talk:TheAnvil|talk]]) 17:37, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

—••— means X in Morse code [[User:Inexorably advancing wall of ice|Inexorably advancing wall of ice]] ([[User talk:Inexorably advancing wall of ice|talk]]) 18:21, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

{{incomplete|Created by a MILLENIAL who has had enough of these weird incomplete tags}}
But seriously, it was funny the first time.[[Citation needed]] I'm sorry for the above incomplete tag in the comments,[[Citation needed] but it feels like most comics since maybe #1900 ([[1914: Twitter Verification]] comes to mind...) have this kind of thing for their incomplete tag. Maybe if it's spaced out more, instead of put into nearly every comic nowadays, it won't be so much of a problem. --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.75.184|162.158.75.184]] 18:02, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

Can someone help me? [[User:Halo422|Halo422]] ([[User talk:Halo422|talk]]) 20:20, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

What's the emoji 2000-2017? [[Special:Contributions/172.68.141.214|172.68.141.214]] 21:05, 2 March 2018 (UTC)
:I think I found it: 💅 [https://emojipedia.org/nail-polish/ "nail-polish"] (Comes up very different on different systems) [[Special:Contributions/162.158.79.233|162.158.79.233]] 21:20, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

I have to believe the 1748 - 1765 generation is some form of "Long s" such as U+1E9C or U+1E9D [[Special:Contributions/162.158.79.233|162.158.79.233]] 21:12, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

: It looks more like a forte ([https://www.fileformat.info/info/unicode/char/1d191/index.htm U+1D191]). I'm not sure why that would be funny—maybe because of [[Wikipedia:fortepiano|fortepiano]]s? [[Special:Contributions/172.69.69.214|172.69.69.214]] 21:43, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

Hitler was born in 1889, about three years before the "Oops, one of us is Hitler" generation ... --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.105.240|141.101.105.240]] 21:37, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

Can someone who's a big Trekkie than I am help explain the dates for ''Star Trek: The Next Generation''? If we're going off of the events of the show + movies, it seems to start well before the events of the show and end before the last of the movies. [[User:PvOberstein|PvOberstein]] ([[User talk:PvOberstein|talk]]) 21:49, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

Filled in most of the table with explanations (I'm pretty sure most of the latter generation names are references to potential transhumanist futures), but I'm not sure what "Second-Greatest" Generation refers to unless it's about the Civil War. Also, I'm not entirely certain whether the generation before the gilded one was cut a lot of slack. And I'll let someone more versed in standard sociological history fill in the common reasons for the core 20th century generations.[[User:WingedCat|WingedCat]] ([[User talk:WingedCat|talk]]) 22:49, 2 March 2018 (UTC)

1962: Generations

2018-03-02T22:44:26Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1962
| date = March 2, 2018
| title = Generations
| image = generations.png
| titletext = For a while it looked like the Paperclip Machines would destroy us, since they wanted to turn the whole universe into paperclips, but they abruptly lost interest in paperclips the moment their parents' generation got into making them, too.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by THE PREVIOUS-PREVIOUS-PREVIOUS GENERATION - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic is making fun of the various names we give "generations", and also predicting some future ones. It refers to the [http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2018/03/01/defining-generations-where-millennials-end-and-post-millennials-begin/ Pew Research Center's recent announcement that they have decided where the Millennial generation ends].

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! scope="col"| Generation
! scope="col"| Time period
! scope="col"| Explanation
|-
| The Founders
| 1730 - 1747
| Most of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Founding_Fathers_of_the_United_States United States' Founding Fathers] were born in this period. (But not all: Benjamin Franklin, for instance, was born two generations prior.)
|-
| Generation ſ
| 1748 - 1765
| ſ is the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_s 'long' S], but it could refer to the baroque or romantic musical periods that saw emerge [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dynamics_(music) specific dynamics identifiers].
|-
| The Adequate Generation
| 1766 - 1783
| Randall apparently found nothing notable about this generation, positive or negative.
|-
| Generation Æ
| 1784 - 1801
| Æ is the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Æ diphthong] Aesh - its name sounds like X, though it is pronounced as a long e.
|-
| The generation we cut a lot of slack because they produced Lincoln
| 1802 - 1819
|
|-
| The Gilded Generation
| 1820 - 1837
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilded_Generation_(Strauss%E2%80%93Howe_theory) So named under the Strauss-Howe generation theory], though they use the time period 1822-1842 instead. This likely refers to the "{{w|Gilded Age}}" of American history, roughly the last three decades of the 19th century.
|-
| The Second-Greatest Generation
| 1838 - 1855
|
|-
| Generation -..-
| 1856 - 1873
| This may be referring to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Morse_code#Comparison_of_American_and_International_Morse Morse Code] for the number 9, although this is the eighth generation in this list. More likely, it is referring to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morse_code the letter X] instead in International Morse Code. This may be an error on Randall's part, since the generations are an American phenomenon. Alternatively, this be a past example of similar cohort of Gen Xers, mirrored by the later "More Gen-Xers somehow". Regardless, this is also a reference to the rise of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Telegraphy telegraphy], though it was "born" prior to 1856.
|-
| The kids who died in the Gilded Generation's factories and mines
| 1874 - 1891
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_labour#The_Industrial_Revolution Child labor] had been widely used since before the start of the Industrial Revolution, but this is when people started doing something about it - and also, when the need for an educated workforce arose, applying substantial economic pressure on societies to put children in school instead. It would be more accurate to label this generation, "The kids who stopped dying in the Gilded Generation's factories and mines".
|-
| Oops, one of us is Hitler
| 1892 - 1909
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adolf_Hitler Adolf Hitler], possibly the most hated (and, by most definitions, evil) man in living human memory as of this comic's posting, was born during in 1889. Aside from the fact that this places him in the previous generation, it seems beyond silly to blame everyone else who was born during this period for being born in the same generation as him. Among those who eventually heard of him (thus, excluding those in isolated areas or who died before he rose to power), the vast majority of them would not hear of him until well after 1909.
|-
| The Greatest Generation
| 1910 - 1927
|
|-
| The Silent Generation
| 1928 - 1945
|
|-
| Baby Boomers
| 1946 - 1963
|
|-
| Generation X
| 1965 - 1981
|
|-
| Millenials
| 1982 - 1999
| The last children born in the 2nd Millennium.
|-
| Generation (emoji)
| 2000 - 2017
| This begins the hypothetical future generation names, though this generation was already fully born as of this comic's posting. Social media was established and rising during the formative years of this generation, and the widespread adoption of emoji began during this time.
|-
| Zuckerberg's Army
| 2018 - 2035
| Continuing on the above, this may be presuming the dominance of FaceBook during the childhoods of this generation, and corresponding social norming as ultimately directed by its leader Mark Zuckerberg. Ironically, as of this comic's posting, [http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/facebook-quit-young-people-social-media-snapchat-instagram-emarketer-a8206486.html young users were already leaving FaceBook for other social media sites].
|-
| The Hovering Ones
| 2036 - 2053
| This may posit increased adoption of cybernetics, which (as with any technology) are more easily adapted by the young who do not have to unlearn previous ways. If advances allowed someone to hover all the time, such that one would not need to walk, this generation's name suggests that becoming so widely used among this generation that they became known for it.
|-
| Spare Parts
| 2054 - 2071
| Continuing on the above speculation about cybernetics, this presumes enough apathy or sociopathy among this generation's parents that giving birth (or other means of creating a new human) was often done to create bodies from which organs could be harvested (presumably primarily for the benefit of their elders).
|-
| More Gen-Xers somehow
| 2072 - 2089
| As with "Generation -..-", this may be positing that Generation X like traits pop up about 3/4 of the way through each century.
|-
| The Paperclip Maximizers
| 2090 - 2107
| This, and the alt text, are references to the concept of a [https://wiki.lesswrong.com/wiki/Paperclip_maximizer paperclip maximizer], where an AI might be designed to be helpful, but end up being harmful. The clicker game [http://www.decisionproblem.com/paperclips/ Universal Paperclips] makes this concept playable. Furthering the above speculation of cybernetics, this generation might be primarily artificial intelligences, though of limited ability to set their own priorities (a flaw which would be fixed in later generations).
|-
| The Mixed Bag (produced 4 Lincolns, 1 Napoleon, and 2 Hitlers)
| 2108 - 2125
| As with the above examples, a generation may become known for its most famous members, but it is not useful to define an entire generation by them.
|-
| The Procedural Generation
| 2136 - 2143
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Procedural_generation Procedural generation] is a way of creating data automatically, rather than capturing it via sensor (including when the "sensor" is a keyboard and the data is typed in). This confusion of the term "generation" could refer to more artificial intelligences that were created via routines instead of directly coded, which would likely stem from attempts to improve child creation once most children were explicitly manufactured instead of relying on evolution-granted biological means.
|-
| Generation Omega
| 2144 - 2161
| "Omega" is the last letter in the Greek alphabet, and used as a symbol of endings. Given the above generation names implying increasingly artificial children, this may suggest the last generation that is recognizably a generation. This does not necessarily mean the end of children or the end of humanity, just that anything after 2161 is widely recognized to no longer have even notional generational coherence - perhaps because of drift (children born to one group during a given time are wildly enough different from children born to another group at the same time that people give up trying to group them by time), child gestation and maturation times (for example, if it became common for a child to go from conception to adulthood in less than a year), or exceptions to what counts as a "child" (for example, if it becomes possible and common to create clones that are somewhere between free-willed beings and mind-controlled drones, and this sufficiently supplants creation of completely free-willed children, regardless of whether the children are artificial intelligences or old-fashioned biological children).
|-
| Star Trek: The Next Generation
|2360 - 2378
|''{{w|Star Trek: The Next Generation}}'' was a TV show set in the future. The first episode of ''TNG'', "{{w|Encounter at Farpoint}}", takes place in 2364, and it concluded with "{{w|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_Good_Things..._(Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation)|All Good Things...}}", which took place in 2370. The final canonical adventures of the cast of ''The Next Generation'' did not occur until the events of ''{{w|Star Trek: Nemesis}}'' in 2379.
|}
==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:"Generatons" are arbitrary. They're just labels we use to obliquely talk about cultural trends.
:But since Pew Research has become the latest to weigh in, and everyone loves a good pointless argument over definitions...

:''xkcd presents''
:A Definitive Chronology of the Generations

:1730-1747 The Founders
:1748-1765 Generation ſ
:1766-1783 The Adequate Generation
:1784-1801 Generation Æ
:1802-1819 The generation we cut a lot of slack because they produced Lincoln
:1820-1837 The Gilded Generation
:1838-1855 The Second-Greatest Generation
:1956-1973 Generation -··-
:1874-1891 The kids who died in the gilded generation's factories and mines
:1992-1909 Oops, one of us is Hitler
:1910-1927 The Greatest Generation
:1928-1945 The Silent Generation
:1916-1763 Baby Boomers
:1964-1981 Generation X
:1982-1799 Millennials
:2000-2017 Generation [nail polish emoji]
:2018-2035 Zuckerberg's army
:2036-2053 The Hovering Ones
:2054-2071 Spare Parts
:2072-2089 More Gen-Xers somehow
:2070-2107 The Paperclip Machines
:2108-2125 The Mixed Bag (produced 4 Lincolns, 1 Napoleon and 2 Hitlers)
:2126-2143 The Procedural Generation
:2144-2161 Generation Ω
:2360-2378 Star Trek: The Next Generation

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Emoji]]

1945: Scientific Paper Graph Quality

2018-01-29T23:30:12Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1945
| date = January 22, 2018
| title = Scientific Paper Graph Quality
| image = scientific_paper_graph_quality.png
| titletext = The worst are graphs with qualitative, vaguely-labeled axes and very little actual data.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Microsoft Paint}} was first introduced in 1985, and {{w|Microsoft PowerPoint}} debuted in 1990. As easy-to-use tools, these allowed for the easy creation of graphs by computer users. The comic implies that these are responsible for decreasing the overall quality of graphs in scientific papers, presumably by enabling a large number of inexperienced designers, and encouraging certain kinds of designs that are ineffective for communicating scientific results.

{{w|Microsoft_PowerPoint#Use_it_less|Critics of PowerPoint}}, such as {{w|Edward_Tufte#Criticism_of_PowerPoint|Edward Tufte}}, have argued that the software is ill-suited for reporting scientific analyses. Many scientific journals nowadays explicitly forbid the use of PowerPoint in their [https://www.sciencemag.org/site/feature/contribinfo/prep/prep_revfigs.xhtml instructions for authors.] It can be argued that other software specifically built for this task - and techniques to do so - have been refined over time, leading to a rise in graph quality outside the PowerPoint/MSPaint era (though see discussion).

The title text states that among the bad quality graphs, the ones “with qualitative, vaguely-labeled axes and very little actual data” are the worst. While this may indicate that the problem with PowerPoint era graphs is that they seem to focus on getting the point across (qualitative as in “you get the idea”) over accuracy (little actual data), this is more than a little self-deprecating, as the comic itself features exactly that sort of lambasted graph. The vertical axis labeled “good” and “bad” is entirely qualitative, the horizontal axis manages to use numbers and still be vague by labeling the area between the ticks as decades instead of labeling the ticks, the definition of what constitutes the ‘PowerPoint / MSPaint era’ is entirely unclear, and it is doubtful that any actual data was used to make the graph – certainly there are no actual data points indicated. Its quality is doubtful, and it might represent more of an impression, or opinion, than an actual fact.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:'''General quality of charts and'''
:'''graphs in scientific papers'''

:[A graph is shown with the y-axis on the origin labeled "bad", on the arrowhead labeled "good", and the x-axis being a timeline labeled with decades from 1950s to 2010s.]

:[The pre-1993 and post-2015 parts are white, with increasing quality before 1990 and after 2015. The 1993-2015 part indicates bad quality and is highlighted in grey, labeled "PowerPoint/MSPaint era".]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Line graphs]]
[[Category:Timelines]]

1948: Campaign Fundraising Emails

2018-01-29T23:18:24Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1948
| date = January 29, 2018
| title = Campaign Fundraising Emails
| image = campaign_fundraising_emails.png
| titletext = The establishment doesn't take us seriously. You know who else they didn't take seriously? Hitler. I'll be like him, but a GOOD guy instead of...
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

Many politicians and organizations in the United States have taken to using aggressive fundraising campaigns by email to seek campaign contributions.

This comic shows a caricature of many people's email inboxes right now. Signing a petition or expressing interest in a cause can lead to being added to a myriad of mailing lists for similar groups, all looking for support. However, the emails get more and more absurd as the list goes on. For example, the last one combines a request for campaign contributions with the infamous Nigerian Prince phishing scheme.

'''DONATE NOW''' is the classic formula, and might be a real example. It is always "crunch time" during a campaign (at least between filing for candidacy and election day), and campaigns are always "low" on cash relative to the unlimited funding they would prefer. The ends of financial reporting periods, often at midnight, are conflated with "deadlines" of significant consequence. Further, the donation requested is less about the actual money - even if $5 each from several thousand voters can add up - but to get a donor to have their money placed on a candidate, making it more likely that donor will vote for the candidate (via encouraging [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunk_cost#Loss_aversion_and_the_sunk_cost_fallacy the "sunk cost" fallacy]).

'''DONATE $35.57 NOW!''' has the email begin to explain how they've tried to get as much money from supporters as possible - while fundraisers will try and work out how to gain money as possible, they would never explain this to their supporters. Such a precise number is also unlikely.

'''HELP''' and '''WE'RE BROKE''' are honest about the campaign's incompetence, but are not likely to get much sympathy except from those already sympathetic to the candidate. Any campaign reduced to this level has probably already lost, though.

'''WASHINGTON IS BROKEN''' may be another real example. This appeal to emotion promises specific action that is unlikely to accomplish much, and is honestly probably unlikely to happen even if the candidate wins, while suggesting the candidate vaguely cares about issues of importance to most voters, as measured by the polls.

'''HOPELESS''' may refer to the videogame Fable 3 where the player needed to generate funds to protect the land from the Darkness.

'''ARE YOU FAMILIAR''' compares a political opponent's plan to the works of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hieronymus_Bosch Hieronymus Bosch], which are famous for depictions of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell Hell] and [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limbo Limbo] as brutal places of highly imaginative torments.

'''OUTRAGEOUS'''. When a politician makes an offensive comment, it's common for the politician's opponents to send out fundraising emails pointing out the politician's offensiveness as a reason to give money to an opponent. Here, the sender's reaction and e-mail fundraising effort appears to be unusually delayed, as it refers to an alleged comment by {{w|Gerald Ford}}, whose term as President of the United States ended in 1977 and who died in 2006.

'''THEY SAY WE CAN'T WIN''' may refer to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Moore#U.S._Senate_special_election_campaign Roy Moore's attempts to overturn his loss in the December 2017 election for one of Alabama's US Senate seats], which came about a month before this comic and made national headlines. After the initial election count had him losing, he demanded a recount. That initial count said he had lost by a large enough margin that Alabama law required him to pay up front for a recount, and his campaign did not have enough funds available.

'''OUR CAMPAIGN'S ONLY CHANCE'''. This e-mail alludes to [https://secure.actblue.com/ ActBlue], a political action committee that collects donations online for Democratic candidates. In reality, there is no Actblue family nor any "Jennifer Actblue" who is the heir to its fortune; the name ActBlue comes from the words "act" and "blue", referring to the {{w|Red states and blue states|color currently associated with the Democratic Party}}.

'''DOOM''' This is an excerpt from Tolkien's poem ''Lament of the Rohirrim,'' appearing in The Two Towers. 
Where now the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? 
Where is the helm and the hauberk, and the bright hair flowing? 
Where is the hand on the harpstring, and the red fire glowing? 
Where is the spring and the harvest and the tall corn growing? 
They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow; 
The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow. 
Who shall gather the smoke of the dead wood burning, 
Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning? 

'''WARMEST GREETINGS''' The opening line is designed to sound like spam for an {{W | Advance-fee scam}}. These scams typically involve impersonating someone rich, often a Nigerian prince, who claims to be in trouble and promises to share a large sum of money if the victim helps him by sending a small fee in advance electronically. However, the second sentence of this email switches to sounding like a political fundraising email instead of an outright scam. This is either to establish a degrading comparison between flagrant scams and fundraising emails, or just to create a bait-and-switch joke.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
'''Donate now.''' It's crunch time, and we're low on cash. If you chip in just $5 by midnight, we... 
'''Donate $35.57 now!''' Our data team has determined that we should ask you for $35.57 to optimize the... 
'''Help.''' Our campaign made some mistakes and we need a lot of money ASAP. Any kind, but cash is... 
'''Washington is broken.''' When I win, I'll look those other senators in the eye and tell them: "Jobs." Then I... 
'''Hopeless.''' It's bad. Really bad. If you don't chip in now, the darkness spreading across the land will... 
As the first woman to fly a fighter jet through our state's formerly all-male university, I learned... 
'''We're broke.''' No paid staff. No ads. And the cafe has told us to stop using their wifi to send fundraising... 
When Amy decided to run for Congress, I was like "Huh?" but I checked Wikipedia, and apparently it's a branch of... 
'''Are you familiar''' with the dutch painter Hieronymous Bosch? His work illustrates my opponent's plan for... 
Being a single mom running a small business while going to law school while being deployed to Iraq taught me... 
'''I will lead the fight''' against the big banks, special interests, the Earth's climate, and our children. I... 
'''Wow.''' Have you seen this video of the squirrel obstacle course? Incredible! Anyway, I'm running because I... 
'''Outrageous.''' Granted, this was a few years ago, but did you hear what President Ford said about... 
'''Whoops.''' Due to a typo, we spent months running attack ads against Tom Hanks. Now, we need to make up for... 
'''They say we can't win-''' that we're "underdogs" with "no money" who "lost the election last week." But they don't... 
'''Our campaign's only chance''' is to seduce Jennifer Actblue, heir to the Actblue fortune. For that, we need a fancy... 
'''Doom.''' Where is the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? They have passed, like rain on... 
'''Warmest greetings.''' I am the crown prince of Nigeria. I am running for Congress because I believe that...

{{comic discussion}}

1948: Campaign Fundraising Emails

2018-01-29T22:40:18Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1948
| date = January 29, 2018
| title = Campaign Fundraising Emails
| image = campaign_fundraising_emails.png
| titletext = The establishment doesn't take us seriously. You know who else they didn't take seriously? Hitler. I'll be like him, but a GOOD guy instead of...
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

Many politicians and organizations in the United States have taken to using aggressive fundraising campaigns by email to seek campaign contributions.

This comic shows a caricature of many people's email inboxes right now. Signing a petition or expressing interest in a cause can lead to being added to a myriad of mailing lists for similar groups, all looking for support. However, the emails get more and more absurd as the list goes on. For example, the last one combines a request for campaign contributions with the infamous Nigerian Prince phishing scheme.

'''DONATE $35.57 NOW!''' has the email begin to explain how they've tried to get as much money from supporters as possible - while fundraisers will try and work out how to gain money as possible, they would never explain this to their supporters. Such a precise number is also unlikely.

'''HOPELESS''' may refer to the videogame Fable 3 where the player needed to generate funds to protect the land from the Darkness.

'''ARE YOU FAMILIAR''' compares a political opponent's plan to the works of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hieronymus_Bosch Hieronymus Bosch], which are famous for depictions of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell Hell] and [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limbo Limbo] as brutal places of highly imaginative torments.

'''OUTRAGEOUS'''. When a politician makes an offensive comment, it's common for the politician's opponents to send out fundraising emails pointing out the politician's offensiveness as a reason to give money to an opponent. Here, the sender's reaction and e-mail fundraising effort appears to be unusually delayed, as it refers to an alleged comment by {{w|Gerald Ford}}, whose term as President of the United States ended in 1977 and who died in 2006.

'''THEY SAY WE CAN'T WIN''' may refer to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Moore#U.S._Senate_special_election_campaign Roy Moore's attempts to overturn his loss in the December 2017 election for one of Alabama's US Senate seats], which came about a month before this comic and made national headlines. After the initial election count had him losing, he demanded a recount. That initial count said he had lost by a large enough margin that Alabama law required him to pay up front for a recount, and his campaign did not have enough funds available.

'''OUR CAMPAIGN'S ONLY CHANCE'''. This e-mail alludes to [https://secure.actblue.com/ ActBlue], a political action committee that collects donations online for Democratic candidates. In reality, there is no Actblue family nor any "Jennifer Actblue" who is the heir to its fortune; the name ActBlue comes from the words "act" and "blue", referring to the {{w|Red states and blue states|color currently associated with the Democratic Party}}.

'''DOOM''' This is an excerpt from Tolkien's poem ''Lament of the Rohirrim,'' appearing in The Two Towers. 
Where now the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? 
Where is the helm and the hauberk, and the bright hair flowing? 
Where is the hand on the harpstring, and the red fire glowing? 
Where is the spring and the harvest and the tall corn growing? 
They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow; 
The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow. 
Who shall gather the smoke of the dead wood burning, 
Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning? 

'''WARMEST GREETINGS''' The opening line is designed to sound like spam for an {{W | Advance-fee scam}}. These scams typically involve impersonating someone rich, often a Nigerian prince, who claims to be in trouble and promises to share a large sum of money if the victim helps him by sending a small fee in advance electronically. However, the second sentence of this email switches to sounding like a political fundraising email instead of an outright scam. This is either to establish a degrading comparison between flagrant scams and fundraising emails, or just to create a bait-and-switch joke.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
'''Donate now.''' It's crunch time, and we're low on cash. If you chip in just $5 by midnight, we... 
'''Donate $35.57 now!''' Our data team has determined that we should ask you for $35.57 to optimize the... 
'''Help.''' Our campaign made some mistakes and we need a lot of money ASAP. Any kind, but cash is... 
'''Washington is broken.''' When I win, I'll look those other senators in the eye and tell them: "Jobs." Then I... 
'''Hopeless.''' It's bad. Really bad. If you don't chip in now, the darkness spreading across the land will... 
As the first woman to fly a fighter jet through our state's formerly all-male university, I learned... 
'''We're broke.''' No paid staff. No ads. And the cafe has told us to stop using their wifi to send fundraising... 
When Amy decided to run for Congress, I was like "Huh?" but I checked Wikipedia, and apparently it's a branch of... 
'''Are you familiar''' with the dutch painter Hieronymous Bosch? His work illustrates my opponent's plan for... 
Being a single mom running a small business while going to law school while being deployed to Iraq taught me... 
'''I will lead the fight''' against the big banks, special interests, the Earth's climate, and our children. I... 
'''Wow.''' Have you seen this video of the squirrel obstacle course? Incredible! Anyway, I'm running because I... 
'''Outrageous.''' Granted, this was a few years ago, but did you hear what President Ford said about... 
'''Whoops.''' Due to a typo, we spent months running attack ads against Tom Hanks. Now, we need to make up for... 
'''They say we can't win-''' that we're "underdogs" with "no money" who "lost the election last week." But they don't... 
'''Our campaign's only chance''' is to seduce Jennifer Actblue, heir to the Actblue fortune. For that, we need a fancy... 
'''Doom.''' Where is the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? They have passed, like rain on... 
'''Warmest greetings.''' I am the crown prince of Nigeria. I am running for Congress because I believe that...

{{comic discussion}}

Talk:1929: Argument Timing

2017-12-20T23:10:17Z

WingedCat:

In addition to the many arguments that might occur through early morning or late night texting, it is also possible that a lot of arguments occur at those times because the facebook and texting activities at those hours interfere with normal healthy life activity and start with one's partner saying something like, "put the phone away and go to sleep". [[User:Rtanenbaum|Rtanenbaum]] ([[User talk:Rtanenbaum|talk]]) 16:54, 15 December 2017 (UTC)

Hopefully someone more talented in maths can calculate if the integrals are identical 🤔 [[Special:Contributions/162.158.93.21|162.158.93.21]] 16:56, 15 December 2017 (UTC)

The graph doesn't say if the probability is per unit time (eg per day), per friendship or per failed friendship. Only in the last case would the integral be 1. For the others you might expect the total probability to be higher now than it was, because it's so much easier.[[Special:Contributions/141.101.104.161|141.101.104.161]] 22:12, 15 December 2017 (UTC)

Gonna be honest, expected a Net Neutrality comic. [[User:DPS2004|DPS2004'); DROP TABLE users;--]] ([[User talk:DPS2004|talk]]) 17:04, 15 December 2017 (UTC)

I would expect the integral under the red line to be much higher - Facebook and like have cheapened the meaning of friendship to the point I don't even KNOW a lot of my so called friends[[Special:Contributions/162.158.126.64|162.158.126.64]] 00:30, 17 December 2017 (UTC)

And this is why I don't use Facebook. ----

A non-zero value after going to sleep doesn't necessarily imply sleep-typing. It could be that he's sending messages just before going to sleep, which then aren't being received by the other party until later.[[Special:Contributions/141.101.76.16|141.101.76.16]] 08:44, 18 December 2017 (UTC)

To react on the "sleep typing" part, and the "receive during the night"/"read while the other is asleep" argument. I think the comic rather highlights the fact a lot of people keep typing on their phones while in bed, or start the day by typing a bit before getting up, while in both cases being "perfectly" awake. This might even be a moment of very strong activity as there is nothing else to do - unlike during lunch breaks or work. Additionally, since more and more people start typing during their pauses, they diminish the chances of having an argument in direct conversation. likewise they don't type so much strong stuff while having others around, in order to remain sort of social. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.54.147|172.69.54.147]] 17:09, 18 December 2017 (UTC)

I like that the timeline ends after he goes to bed, as it should be (and not at midnight, like so many stupid calendar apps do). --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.54.76|172.68.54.76]] 04:14, 19 December 2017 (UTC)

::It's not just 'sleep typing' or delays in receiving messages (note, that due to snail mail, etc., this should have always been a non-zero rate-of-occurrence) modern social media allows us to get into friendship ending arguments even when neither party is conscious simultaneously much more easily than was ever possible before, as seen by the many, many arguments that occur through short utterances, issued at a rate between that of face-to-face verbal communication and postal missive. For example, Party A can discover an old remark that Party 1 made, quite sometime previously, on one of their 'walls,' and respond to it, prompting a response from Part 1...in this manner, the two Parties could have quite the heated argument, with a facility and fevor difficult to match with olde fashion pen-and-ink-and-Pony-Express methods, and easily destroy a friendship with far greater efficiency than our less advantaged forebears. -[[Special:Contributions/172.68.54.4|172.68.54.4]] 05:01, 20 December 2017 (UTC)

Outside of the waking-up and falling-asleep periods, does this mean that arguments have gone down since the rise of social media, or are the red and black lines adjusted to the total number of arguments per day? [[User:WingedCat|WingedCat]] ([[User talk:WingedCat|talk]]) 23:10, 20 December 2017 (UTC)

Talk:1925: Self-Driving Car Milestones

2017-12-06T19:55:07Z

WingedCat:

This page is, without offense to the creator, a mess. We're gonna need a table for this. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.47.78|172.68.47.78]] 19:14, 6 December 2017 (UTC)
* Or at least a list. I have created one, but it could use fleshing out.[[User:WingedCat|WingedCat]] ([[User talk:WingedCat|talk]]) 19:55, 6 December 2017 (UTC)

1925: Self-Driving Car Milestones

2017-12-06T19:53:28Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1925
| date = December 6, 2017
| title = Self-Driving Car Milestones
| image = self_driving_car_milestones.png
| titletext = I'm working on a car capable of evaluating arbitrarily complex boolean expressions on "honk if [...]" bumper stickers and responding accordingly.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BOT DRIVER - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic is a list of milestones for self-driving cars. Some have already been achieved, others are still being worked on, while others are facetious "milestones".

* Automatic emergency brakes: this is another reference to how hard it can be to program human-obvious stuff (add link https://xkcd.com/1425/). A self driving car has to be able to distinguish a danger (cliff, person on foot, other cars coming the wrong way/doing weird stuff) from either the side of the road, the background, the other cars or even a light pole safely standing on the side of the road. Then the car also has to decide whether turn around, just slow down (as danger is not imminent) or actually do the strong brake (and optimally decide what would be the most effective, taking into account weather conditions, road type and traffic). There are big potential advantages for self driving cars, in case of success: computers don't panic, would have faster reaction times than humans, and would have more reliable judgment than humans (add link https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autonomous_car#Safety)

* Highway lane-keeping: sometimes, especially on highways where road delimitations might be faint or absent (https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/11/Route_66_2073773569_7b3fae3b91_b.jpg/220px-Route_66_2073773569_7b3fae3b91_b.jpg) or when lane markings could have faded away, a self driving car programmed to pilot based on road markings would have issues holding to the good side of the road. this is a bigger problem than in cities as cars move faster on highways, so the danger detection mentioned above might not manage to detect danger in time while breaking or avoiding the obstacle needs to be anticipated much more.

* Self-parking: already implemented in recent normal cars, that feature is important for the car not to stay in the road after use [citation needed], and is sometimes considered as a difficult maneuver by to-be-drivers (citation?) as it requires a good "feeling" of the car dimensions, as well as of distances and maneuverability of the car. (the latter parameters being easy to compute, with radar and back-camera aide, is made rather easy for computers (citation?))

* Full highway autonomy: the ability for a car to drive itself on a highway. As of 2017, there are plans (add link http://www.popularmechanics.com/technology/infrastructure/a13615577/self-driving-cars-lane-wisconsin/) under consideration to set highway lanes aside for self-driving cars, but this milestone would require such a car to be able to operate on a highway that also has human-driven cars - as well as wildlife, pedestrians, debris, and other such obstacles should they enter the highway.

* First sex in a self-driving car: this is not a milestone for the cars themselves, but just the age-old [citation needed] practice of having sex in cars, performed in a car that happens to be self-driving. Whether or not this would happen while the car is in motion (other than that induced by the passengers) and/or on a public road is not specified, though both are implied. Given the nature of human sexuality [no citation needed], it is quite likely this has already happened, but no one recorded the incident.

* Full trips with no input from driver: the main point of self-driving cars, allowing all humans within to act as passengers. As of 2017, self-driving cars require a human to be able to take over just in case, but any such trip where the human never actually took control would qualify for this milestone.

* Full trips by empty cars: a more severe version of the above, since with no humans present, no human can take control. This could be considered fulfilled by the DARPA Grand Challenge (add link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DARPA_Grand_Challenge), as the challenges are racing competitions of autonomous cars with no humans on board.

* Self-refueling of empty cars: this would either require a robotic fuel station (thus, able to refuel cars with humans inside as well), or an ordinary full-service fuel station (that is, one where the station's employee performs the refueling of the car) that happens to service a self-driving car with no humans aboard (which could be arranged as a publicity stunt).

* An empty car wandering the highways for months or years until someone notices the credit card fuel charges: the first completely facetious milestone of the list (since "first sex", despite having little to do with self-driving cars, has probably happened). Cars are expensive [citation needed] enough that, were one to drive itself off and wander, some effort would be made to track it down. As this would require the self-refueling milestone, local fuel stations could be alerted to look for the "rogue" car - and in any case, whatever payment method is used to pay for the fuel would be traced.

* Cars that read other cars' bumper stickers before deciding whether to cut them off: another facetious milestone, implying self-driving cars might obtain artificial intelligence and political opinions that might override safety and efficiency of transit, so this seems unlikely to actually happen.

* Autonomous engine revving at red lights: mimicing the human practice. This has probably been done for show at a race, but that is a robot following a programmed routine that has nothing directly to do with self-driving.

* Self-loathing cars: this would require cars to become sentient enough to understand, and have negative opinions, about themselves. Depending on one's definition, though, self-diagnostic software might qualify, as they would be running on a car's computer and express a negative opinion about the car (albeit limited to the context of the car needing maintenance).

* Autonomous canyon jumping: although it seems unlikely that a navigation routine would ever decide that jumping a canyon is part of an optimal route, a car could be programmed to jump a canyon as part of a stunt or show, with no human driver (or any other human aboard) at the time of the jump. It is questionable how "autonomous" such a car would be, though.

* Cars capable of arguing about the trolley problem on facebook: the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trolley_problem trolley problem] is a well-known thought experiment in ethics, in which a person must choose between passively allowing several people to die, or actively causing a single person to die. Such a choice could plausibly be forced on the computer of self-driving car. For example, if the car could avoid a high-speed collision only by running down a pedestrian.

* Evaluating arbitrarily complex boolean expressions on "honk if [...]" bumper stickers and responding accordingly (title text): as with the cut-off milestone, this implies development of artificial intelligence unrelated to the basic functions of a car, though still imitating human drivers' behavior. This a joke about Boolean satisfiability, as evaluating an arbitrarily complex bumper sticker and determining whether to honk is NP-complete.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

Upcoming and recently-achieved 
'''Self-driving car milestones'''

* Automatic emergency braking
* Highway lane-keeping
* Self-parking
* Full highway autonomy
* First sex in a self-driving car
* Full trips with no input from driver
* Full trips by empty cars
* An empty car wandering the highways for months or years until someone notices the credit card fuel charges
* Cars that read other cars' bumper stickers before deciding whether to cut them off
* Autonomous engine revving at red lights
* Self-loathing cars
* Autonomous canyon jumping
* Cars capable of arguing about the trolley problem on facebook

{{comic discussion}}

1915: Nightmare Email Feature

2017-11-29T22:22:04Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1915
| date = November 13, 2017
| title = Nightmare Email Feature
| image = nightmare_email_feature.png
| titletext = "...just got back and didn't see your message until just now. Sorry! -- TIME THIS MESSAGE SAT HALF-FINISHED IN DRAFTS FOLDER: 3 days, 2 hours, 45 minutes."
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Added explanation of the e-mail itself, but it could need a tweak...}}

Most modern email clients provide tools to help their users read, write and keep track of email efficiently. For instance, the user may receive a notification if the email body contains wording that suggests a file has been attached, but there is no actual attachment, in order to prevent forgetting to include the intended file in the email.

This comic suggests a similar feature, one which would inform not the user, but the recipient of the message, how long the email has been revised before being sent. This is an expansion of a common feature of collaboration tools used by law firms, and modern word processors such as Microsoft Word 2016. [[Randall]] calls this his nightmare email feature, implying he spends too much time in revision of what should be simple email messages and that making himself - or worse, the recipient - aware of the actual time would make him anxious.

In the shown case it seems that the recipient of the shown e-mail had asked to their latest meeting and asks if he want to do it again this weekend. It then took 47 minutes to write a short reply in which he ends up saying he enjoyed the thing referred to. But alas he has no time this weekend. And then let the other suggest a possible time for a dinner...or something. (Of course there could be more to the email above the panel, but it seems to be a very short answer to another e-mail, and it increases the nightmare for the writer (and the impact of the joke) if this was all that was written in 47 minutes).

If the text had been written out in less than 2 minutes, it would not have been a problem. But it seemed the writer of this e-mail had to think a lot about how it was phrased. This could lead the recipient to wonder what took so long. Was it that he did not enjoy it, but ended up writing this to be nice? He only writes he is busy this weekend, thus not giving any reason as to why. And the last part gives him the possibility to also "be busy" on whatever time is suggested for dinner. Also whatever is very non committing. All this is also true if it had been written in 2 minutes, but then at least there would not have been time to think a lot about how the reply was phrased.

The title text describes a similar uncomfortable feature, which would inform the recipient how long a message has been sitting in the user's ''drafts'' folder, thus highlighting their procrastination as well as demonstrating that "(...)didn't see your message until just now" is a lie, or at least it was only true when the original message was written, and now three days later another message should have been written instead.

Randall has explored a related anxiety-inducing feature of instant messaging in [[1886: Typing Notifications]].

==Transcript==
:[A panel with a short email message, with the first line partly obscured by the top of the panel. Below that, in light gray font, is an information message from the email client.]
:Enjoyed it! I'm busy this weekend, but let me know if you're free sometime next week and want to get dinner or something.

:Total time spent revising this email before sending: 47 minutes 12 seconds
:...

:[Caption below the panel:]
:My nightmare email feature

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Email]]

1891: Obsolete Technology

2017-09-18T20:46:47Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1891
| date = September 18, 2017
| title = Obsolete Technology
| image = obsolete_technology.png
| titletext = And I can't believe some places still use fax machines. The electrical signals waste so much time going AROUND the Earth when neutrino beams can go straight through!
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Someone please find some statistics for annual fireworks casualties and injuries.}}

This comic mocks people who criticize an industry for using obsolete technology, even when said technology is sufficient for the task at hand. The claim often comes with the implication that those in charge of the industry are behind the times and cannot adapt to the cutting edge. What these critics often fail to realize is that there are cost benefits to sticking with "obsolete" infrastructure, and that upgrading to the newest tech can introduce unwanted side effects and other risks.

Here, Ponytail is one such critic, complaining that the business is taking "forever" to get with the times. Megan uses sarcasm to deliver her counterargument, (although she may be serious): despite the advent of nuclear weapons, fireworks use the ancient technology of {{w|gunpowder}} (invented in the 9th century), because fireworks are used by civilians for celebratory purposes and should have as few lethal side effects as possible{{Citation needed}}. As they use gunpowder, fireworks do claim a handful of lives and cause thousands of injuries each year due to improper handling procedures. Nuclear-based fireworks would not only cause much larger and immediately lethal explosions{{Citation needed}}, but would also release radiation that would poison spectators.

{{w|MS-DOS}} is a computer operating system made by {{w|Microsoft}} that was dominant during much of the 1980s. When Microsoft released Windows, a newer operating system (or series of operating systems), they encouraged people to switch to that, which many did. DOS became essentially obsolete when Microsoft released Windows 95 in 1995. However, there remain rare circumstances in which DOS is still preferred, such as when no mouse, touchscreen, or other pointing hardware is available.

The title text uses a different twist: it criticizes current use of fax machine, which many find obsolete compared to e-mail (fax machines now hard to find, black and white only, text sent as image making further treatment complicated, waste of ink and paper for recipient while sender has to pay per fax in some countries), then argues it is obsolete due to being electrons-based while neutrinos-based communication would be faster. In 2017 neutrino detectors are heavy and expensive, used for nuclear research only. Electronic communications travel at a fair share of speed of light, so neutrino-based communication would be way too expensive compared to the speed gain. Real-world fax detractors would rather replace it with other electronic communication systems, not neutronic ones.

==Transcript==

:[Ponytail sits in front of an old computer. Megan stands behind her.]
:Ponytail: Whoa, this is running MS-DOS! It's weird how new technology takes forever to reach some industries.
:Megan: Yeah. Like how we still use gunpowder for fireworks, even though we've had nuclear weapons for over 70 years.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category: Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category: Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category: Computers]]

1889: xkcd Phone 6

2017-09-18T20:39:00Z

WingedCat: /* List of features (clockwise from center/top) */

{{comic
| number = 1889
| date = September 13, 2017
| title = xkcd Phone 6
| image = xkcd_phone_6.png
| titletext = We understand your privacy concerns; be assured that our phones will never store or transmit images of your face.
}}

==Explanation==

This is the sixth entry in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone series]], released the day after Apple announced their new {{w|iPhone 8}} and the higher-end {{w|iPhone X}} (pronounced iPhone 10) with facial recognition features.

===List of features (clockwise from center/top)===

; Front camera (centered for eye contact during video chat)
: Front camera is a common feature of smartphones. The camera lens is located on the same side of the phone's case as the main screen and therefore it is possible to capture the image of the user's face looking at the screen and display the interlocutor's face on the screen simultaneously, enabling video chat. However, as the camera is usually located above the screen, a user looking at the displayed image of the other person directs his or her eyes at the center of the screen and not at the camera's lens. This is very visible on the other end of the chat as if the person talking was looking down and not in the interlocutor's face which is an uncomfortable situation for most people. For this reason, professionals involved in movie or TV-making, like actors or reporters, are trained to look straight into the camera's lens while talking, which creates impression of looking straight at the viewer's face. During a video chat, however, looking into the lens of an above-screen camera does not allow one to see the interlocutor's face clearly because it is then in the peripheral field of vision.

: To solve this conundrum, Randall proposes locating the camera lens right in the middle of the screen. Therefore the user looking at the screen to see the other person's face would be also looking at the lens, creating an impression of a straight look on the other end of the chat. This is absurd since the lens would then take place of some of the center pixels of the screen, not allowing the display the center part of the captured image of the other person's face (like eyes and/or lips) which is most important for nonverbal communication. Such location of the camera lens would also likely interfere with touch-screen function. It will make other applications on the phone difficult to use, since virtually no user interface is designed to accommodate for a blind spot in the center.

; Full-width rear camera
: Phone cameras tend to have lenses which are quite small and round or square -- same width as height. Full-width makes it sound like the camera lens is really wide, as in a long oval or rectangle shape. This could allow the camera to gather a lot more light, potentially working in low light situations. However the lens would be more vulnerable to damage and dirt. Unless a very large sensor was used, focusing the image could be a problem, since cell phones are typically not very deep.

; CDC partnership - phone automatically administers seasonal flu vaccine to cheek every year
: U.S. {{w|Centers for Disease Control and Prevention}} is a government agency tasked with addressing public health concerns such as infectious diseases, including seasonal flu. A common way of limiting spread of an infectious disease is {{w|Vaccine|vaccination}}, which most often involves administering a specially prepared medicine via an {{w|intramuscular injection}}. Researchers have investigated other delivery systems, including aerosol, or microneedle injection. This features implies that the phone would automatically perform some form of injection once a year, administering vaccine via a small aperture while the user is holding the phone to his or her cheek during a call. However, the placement of this component is unusual as it would line up with the user's ear rather than cheek during a phone call.

; 12-function
: Most smartphones can be used for more than 12 different things{{Citation needed}}. However, this may refer to the 12 basic functions of algebra (identity, squaring, cubing, square root, logarithm, exponential, reciprocal, sine, cosine, greatest integer, absolute value, and logistic), or the twelve function keys on a modern keyboard (more than the ten on the original IBM PC keyboard). Alternatively it may be a reference to calculators: basic models are sometimes referred to as four function calculators (addition, subtraction, multiplication and division), and complex scientific calculators may advertise 250 or more functions.

; Dishwasher safe
: Usually a feature of plastic containers or fancy dishes. Unlikely to appear on a smartphone, though potentially useful if you need to clean your screen. This feature may be a reference to [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPGY2T9r1Ok this Knallerfrauen sketch] where an elderly user puts an iPad into a dishwasher to clean it.

; GPS transmitter
: Many smartphones have a receiver for the Global Positioning System, which allows a phone to compute its position based on signals from the constellation(s) of GPS satellites. However, a device with a "GPS transmitter" would broadcast signals that would interfere with the GPS receivers of all devices nearby. This might be used in some form of differential GPS, broadcasting signals from a known location to allow more precise determination of other locations. Or such a system might be used to confuse or control devices, such as drones, which navigate using GPS.

; 3-G acceleration
: This may be a mixing of 3-D acceleration, which refers to graphics, accelerometers, which are a common feature of modern smartphones that allows them to detect movement, and 3G, referring to communications systems. {{w|Graphics processing unit|Three-d acceleration hardware}} speeds up handling of spatial data, such as generating pictures of a simulated environment. Usually, a phone is {{w|3G|3G compatible}} if it uses a certain standard ("third generation") for data communication. However, 3-G acceleration implies the phone can accelerate at a rate of 3 times the acceleration of gravity, or approximately 30 m/s². An untrained human experiencing 3G for extensive periods of time can suffer injuries as a result, as can an untrained phone.

; Portable, solar-heated
: Portability is pretty much the entire point of using a ''mobile'' phone, so advertising portability is rather pointless. Solar ''power'' charging could be a very useful feature on a phone, but solar ''heating'' usually applies to plumbing, where a water tank is heated by the sun and used to supply hot water to taps. Technically, as the sun heats up everything it shines on, the phone is in fact solar heated.

;Pore-cleaning strip
: Presumably this would be part of the ''Shroud of Turin-style facial transfer unlock'', where the phone would use the dirt and oils collected from the user's face being pressed against the phone to to verify their identity. Something sticky on that location would be very annoying for clean-shaven people and extremely painful for anyone with facial hair. See also [[777: Pore Strips]]

; Maximum strength
: Medicines are often sold as "Maximum strength", as in the highest dose allowed by law or allowed without a prescription. For phones, there are sometimes "hardened" or "ruggedized" versions which are designed to survive harsher environmental conditions such as surviving drops and collisions, excessive water, dust, etc. So Maximum strength could indicate a "ruggedized" phone, though a screen that extended past the edges would likely have the opposite effect.

; Never needs sharpening
: Phones do not need to be sharpened in the first place{{Citation needed}}. This is a feature more likely to be found in a knife advertisement (especially for a knife that cannot be sharpened, like a serrated or ceramic blade), or on a mechanical pencil. But since the screen goes past the edge, it might be sharp enough to cut through things, much like a knife. Note that this feature combination would prevent the phone from safe handling and carrying it in your pockets.

; Can survive up to 30 minutes out of water
: This is a play on the common IP-rating of water resistance, which is typically rated for submersion to a rated depth for 30 minutes. A phone which could only be used or carried for 30 minutes and then needed to be immersed in water would be rather inconvenient, especially if it was still susceptible to short-circuiting as most electronic devices do when submerged. On the other hand, perhaps this phone's target market are whales and dolphins. This would be a useful feature for them.

; Exclusive Audubon Society app identifies birds and lets you control their flight
: {{w|National Audubon Society}} is a non-profit organization dedicated to conservation of nature, mainly of birds, also organizing open {{w|birdwatching}} events. An app that identifies bird species, as for example from a photo of a bird made by the smartphone itself, would be cool. An app allowing you to control the bird's flight would be way cooler, but it is not possible with current technology - and it would fly in the face of the Audubon Society core activity. This is a reference to {{w|Unmanned_aerial_vehicle|drones}} (artificial "birds") which are often controlled by a smartphone app. This may also be a reference to [[1425: Tasks]], in which an app that can recognize if a bird is on camera is proposed.

; Extra screen
:Possibly because of the center camera, an additional section of screen was added. Some phones also advertise having extra screen, although this refers to having a larger screen in general, rather than a small rectangle added to the bottom.

; Wireless charging port
:A rather pointless feature; because wireless charging has no wires, it needs no port. (Unless it is required for fuel for a fuel cell. See clean coal, below.) This may be a play on Apple's removal of headphone port from their previous phones.

; Safe for ages 6-8 months, 10 months, 18 months-3 years, and 12 years and older
:Usually an item is deemed safe for a particular age or older, or (in the case of toys) is recommended for a particular age range. This is unusual in that it's a hodge-podge of age ranges with no apparent reason why some ages are safe and others are not. It may be a parody of drug commercials that list several age ranges for which the drug had to be separately approved.

; Screen goes past the edge
:A parody of the trend of "edge to edge" displays in recent generations of smartphones, or phones whose screens curve partway around the edge of the phone.

; High thread count CPU
:A CPU thread is a task the CPU performs. Several threads may share memory making them a process. Threads are meant to run in parallel and the operating system distributes the workload on the available hardware execution units. These execution units are sometimes called hardware threads, especially when there is more than one per processing unit (or core). For example, the Intel Core i7 7700 is considered a 4-core, 8-thread CPU. The vague "high thread count" statement could make sense in this context, however, it is most likely a joke about bedding, where it is an actual selling point. High thread count is a marketing term for linens, where it signifies the density of threads in a textile.

; Shroud of Turin-style facial transfer unlock
:The {{w|Shroud of Turin}} contains an image of a face -- originally believed to be of {{w|Jesus Christ}}, before the Shroud was found to be 1200 years too young. Presumably, to unlock this phone, the user would have to physically {{w|facepalm|press their face}} against the phone, the way Shroud-Man's image was allegedly transferred to the shroud. This is likely a reference to the iPhone X's FaceID unlock, which uses a ''photograph'' of your face augmented with spatial information to unlock it and which had attracted [https://www.wired.com/story/iphone-x-faceid-security/ significant criticism] immediately before this comic came out.

; Fonts developed by NASA
: Between 1975 and 1992 NASA used the {{w|NASA insignia|"worm" logotype}} in its insignia. It was a special font omitting the horizontal bar in the capitalized letter A. May be a reference to many advertisements that claim their product uses technology developed by NASA. This seems impressive, as NASA technology does tend to be quite strong and advanced, as they claim at their [https://spinoff.nasa.gov/ spin off] website. However, it would not be as impressive due to fonts having very little to do with NASA's core operations.

; Includes applicator
: What tampon packages, cosmetics, paints, and other products often say. An applicator for a phone would be absurd since the phone cannot be applied, spread, inserted, or attached to something else. This may be referring back to the aforementioned yearly vaccine.

; Burns clean coal
: There is marketing, trying to appear to be using clean energy, due to pollution concerns. Coal burning power plants are usually quite large, so a traditional coal fired thermal-electric plant in a cell phone would be absurd. However, {{w|Fuel cell|fuel cells}}, which produce electricity by oxidizing some fuel can be small enough to fit in a cell phone, but they do not typically burn coal. Clean coal is coal that is burned so that it does not give off as much soot, sulphur dioxide, nitrogen oxides, mercury, or other pollutants as "normal" coal, or methods of burning coal that give off relatively less pollutants. (The cordless charging port might be receptacle for refueling the phone, using liquid, or using a fuel cartridge.)

; Pre-seasoned
:Pre-seasoned typically refers to cast iron cookware which is ready to use out of the box, as opposed to needing to season it with oil and heat. It can also refer to packaged meats which are ready to cook without needing to be seasoned with herbs and spices, or timber that has been dried and is ready for use.

; Broad-spectrum SPF 30
:The xkcd phone somehow gives a sun protection factor (SPF) 30 level of protection for the skin from sun light. Perhaps the phone itself blocks 97% of UVB radiation (this being the definition of "SPF 30"), allowing 3% through, although this would be remarkably more translucent than most phones (which allow much less than 1% of UVB, or any other visible or near-visible wavelength, through). This would only apply to the patch of skin it blocks sunlight from.

; College-ruled
:College-ruled is a style of notebook paper having narrower lines in order to fit more text per page. That the phone is college-ruled suggests that there are lines permanently displayed on the screen, which would obscure any images on the screen, along with any text that doesn't line up with the lines. Defective screens can show similar patterns. For example, the iPhone 6 "touch disease" cause regularly spaced vertical lines to appear on top of the screen. Here, it is possible that the manufacturer tries to pass off screen defects as features.

; Sterile packaging
:Useful for medical supplies, less so in a phone.

; Radium backlight
:The discovery of the radioactive element radium sparked a brief fad in which some watch makers painted watch faces or hands with a paint containing radium and a radioluminescent substance, such as zinc sulfide, which converted the radiation from the radium into visible light. This allowed the time to be read at night without an external power source for the light. However, it was eventually realized that regular exposure to radium could result in radiation poisoning, particularly for the workers assembling and painting the watches. A radium-based backlight would therefore be both potentially dangerous (especially for an object carried on one's person much of the time) but also largely useless, as the radioluminescent light is rather dim compared to conventional phone back lights.

; 4K pixels (50×80)
:This refers to having 4,000 pixels in the screen in total, rather than a screen width of ~4000 pixels. TVs advertised as "4K" are typically up to 4096 × 2160 pixels, or 8.8 million pixels. That would be outstanding for a cell phone whereas 4,000 pixels total would be horrendous. As a comparison, the old Commodore VIC-20 with a resolution of 176 × 184 would have over 8 times the pixels of this phone. It is however quite close to the screen resolution of the sturdy Nokia 3310, boasting a total of 4032 pixels positioned 84 × 48.

In the caption below the phone [[Randall]] presents many different version numbers:
*The number 6 is in correct order of all the xkcd phones
*The {{w|Roman numerals|roman number}} VIII refers to the newly announced {{w|iPhone 8}} and jokes about the roman number X below
*Version number 10 is the current version of Microsoft Windows
*The {{w|iPhone X}} was announced together with the iPhone 8 by Apple on September 12, 2017, a day before this comic was released. Apple clarified X must be read as the roman number 10, so for additional absurdity two xkcd phones share the same number, using different numeral
*The number 26 refers to the number of letters in the English alphabet
*In the year 1876 {{w|Alexander Graham Bell}} received the U.S. Patent No. 174465 for the {{w|invention of the telephone}}, but there is still a {{w|Elisha Gray and Alexander Bell telephone controversy|controversy}} whether {{w|Elisha Gray}} was the first who presented a working telephone.
Below these numbers Randall states that xkcd isn't responsible for this ''nonconsecutive version number war'', but, as it can be seen here above, he attempts to win. By counting parallel version numbers xkcd defeated Apple 6:2. The "nonconsecutive version number war" refers to several recent phones, and possibly operating systems, released consecutively with nonconsecutive version numbers, including:
*The iPhone X (or Ten) which will be released shortly after the iPhone 8
*The Samsung Galaxy Note 7 was released after the Note 5
*The Oneplus 5 was released after the OnePlus 3T
*Microsoft Windows 10 was released after Microsoft Windows 8, officially skipping Microsoft Windows 9

The symbols at the end are ™ for trademark, ® for registered trademark, and © for a copyright protection. The degree symbol ° after the letter C could be a play with degree Celsius. The use of all four symbols after the phrase is ridiculous, as ™ and ® indicate trademarks with opposite registration statuses, slogans can't be copyrighted, and the degree symbol usually has no meaning when applied to text.

In the title text Randall attributes privacy concerns about the facial recognition feature. A picture of a face will only be used for facial recognition, but never stored on the device nor transmitted to internet. A ''small'' side effect may be that the famous selfie pictures aren't possible anymore, as well as video calls.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[A smartphone is shown, the screen is slightly wider than the case, in the middle is a photo lens, and at the right bottom a small extra part is added to the screen.]
:[On top a bracket ranges nearly over the entire width of the case. The text reads:]
:Full-width rear camera
:[The label at the photo lens is:]
:Front camera (centered for eye contact during video chat)
:[The label on the extra part says:]
:Extra screen
:[At the bottom below the case a label reads:]
:Wireless charging port

:[The labels left to the phone are:]
:4k pixels (50x80)
:Radium backlight
:Sterile packaging
:College-ruled
:Broad spectrum SPF 30
:Pre-seasoned
:Burns clean coal
:Includes applicator
:Fonts developed by NASA
:Shroud of turn-style facial transfer unlock
:High thread count CPU
:Screen goes past the edge
:Safe for ages 6-8 months, 10 months, 18 months-3 years, and 12 years and older

:[The labels right to the phone are:]
:CDC partnership: Phone automatically administers seasonal flu vaccine to cheek every year
:12-function
:Dishwasher safe
:GPS transmitter
:3-G acceleration
:Portable, solar-heated
:Pore-cleaning strip
:Maximum strength
:Never needs sharpening
:Can survive up to 30 minutes out of water
:Exclusive Audubon Society app identifies birds and lets you control their flight

:[Text below the phone:]
:Introducing
:'''The XKCD PHONE 6, VIII, 10, X, 26, and 1876'''
:''We didn't start this nonconsecutive version number war, but we will not lose it.''™®©°
{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:xkcd Phones]]

1889: xkcd Phone 6

2017-09-18T20:38:33Z

WingedCat: /* List of features (clockwise from center/top) */

{{comic
| number = 1889
| date = September 13, 2017
| title = xkcd Phone 6
| image = xkcd_phone_6.png
| titletext = We understand your privacy concerns; be assured that our phones will never store or transmit images of your face.
}}

==Explanation==

This is the sixth entry in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone series]], released the day after Apple announced their new {{w|iPhone 8}} and the higher-end {{w|iPhone X}} (pronounced iPhone 10) with facial recognition features.

===List of features (clockwise from center/top)===

; Front camera (centered for eye contact during video chat)
: Front camera is a common feature of smartphones. The camera lens is located on the same side of the phone's case as the main screen and therefore it is possible to capture the image of the user's face looking at the screen and display the interlocutor's face on the screen simultaneously, enabling video chat. However, as the camera is usually located above the screen, a user looking at the displayed image of the other person directs his or her eyes at the center of the screen and not at the camera's lens. This is very visible on the other end of the chat as if the person talking was looking down and not in the interlocutor's face which is an uncomfortable situation for most people. For this reason, professionals involved in movie or TV-making, like actors or reporters, are trained to look straight into the camera's lens while talking, which creates impression of looking straight at the viewer's face. During a video chat, however, looking into the lens of an above-screen camera does not allow one to see the interlocutor's face clearly because it is then in the peripheral field of vision.

: To solve this conundrum, Randall proposes locating the camera lens right in the middle of the screen. Therefore the user looking at the screen to see the other person's face would be also looking at the lens, creating an impression of a straight look on the other end of the chat. This is absurd since the lens would then take place of some of the center pixels of the screen, not allowing the display the center part of the captured image of the other person's face (like eyes and/or lips) which is most important for nonverbal communication. Such location of the camera lens would also likely interfere with touch-screen function. It will make other applications on the phone difficult to use, since virtually no user interface is designed to accommodate for a blind spot in the center.

; Full-width rear camera
: Phone cameras tend to have lenses which are quite small and round or square -- same width as height. Full-width makes it sound like the camera lens is really wide, as in a long oval or rectangle shape. This could allow the camera to gather a lot more light, potentially working in low light situations. However the lens would be more vulnerable to damage and dirt. Unless a very large sensor was used, focusing the image could be a problem, since cell phones are typically not very deep.

; CDC partnership - phone automatically administers seasonal flu vaccine to cheek every year
: U.S. {{w|Centers for Disease Control and Prevention}} is a government agency tasked with addressing public health concerns such as infectious diseases, including seasonal flu. A common way of limiting spread of an infectious disease is {{w|Vaccine|vaccination}}, which most often involves administering a specially prepared medicine via an {{w|intramuscular injection}}. Researchers have investigated other delivery systems, including aerosol, or microneedle injection. This features implies that the phone would automatically perform some form of injection once a year, administering vaccine via a small aperture while the user is holding the phone to his or her cheek during a call. However, the placement of this component is unusual as it would line up with the user's ear rather than cheek during a phone call.

; 12-function
: Most smartphones can be used for more than 12 different things{{Citation needed}}. However, this may refer to the 12 basic functions of algebra (identity, squaring, cubing, square root, logarithm, exponential, reciprocal, sine, cosine, greatest integer, absolute value, and logistic), or the twelve function keys on a modern keyboard (more than the ten on the original IBM PC keyboard). Alternatively it may be a reference to calculators: basic models are sometimes referred to as four function calculators (addition, subtraction, multiplication and division), and complex scientific calculators may advertise 250 or more functions.

; Dishwasher safe
: Usually a feature of plastic containers or fancy dishes. Unlikely to appear on a smartphone, though potentially useful if you need to clean your screen. This feature may be a reference to [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPGY2T9r1Ok this Knallerfrauen sketch] where an elderly user puts an iPad into a dishwasher to clean it.

; GPS transmitter
: Many smartphones have a receiver for the Global Positioning System, which allows a phone to compute its position based on signals from the constellation(s) of GPS satellites. However, a device with a "GPS transmitter" would broadcast signals that would interfere with the GPS receivers of all devices nearby. This might be used in some form of differential GPS, broadcasting signals from a known location to allow more precise determination of other locations. Or such a system might be used to confuse or control devices, such as drones, which navigate using GPS.

; 3-G acceleration
: This may be a mixing of 3-D acceleration, which refers to graphics, accelerometers, which are a common feature of modern smartphones that allows them to detect movement, and 3G, referring to communications systems. {{w|Graphics processing unit|Three-d acceleration hardware}} speeds up handling of spatial data, such as generating pictures of a simulated environment. Usually, a phone is {{w|3G|3G compatible}} if it uses a certain standard ("third generation") for data communication. However, 3-G acceleration implies the phone can accelerate at a rate of 3 times the acceleration of gravity, or approximately 30 m/s². An untrained human experiencing 3G for extensive periods of time can suffer injuries as a result, as can an untrained phone.

; Portable, solar-heated
: Portability is pretty much the entire point of using a ''mobile'' phone, so advertising portability is rather pointless. Solar ''power'' charging could be a very useful feature on a phone, but solar ''heating'' usually applies to plumbing, where a water tank is heated by the sun and used to supply hot water to taps. Technically, as the sun heats up everything it shines on, the phone is in fact solar heated.

;Pore-cleaning strip
: Presumably this would be part of the ''Shroud of Turin-style facial transfer unlock'', where the phone would use the dirt and oils collected from the user's face being pressed against the phone to to verify their identity. Something sticky on that location would be very annoying for clean-shaven people and extremely painful for anyone with facial hair. See also [[777: Pore Strips]]

; Maximum strength
: Medicines are often sold as "Maximum strength", as in the highest dose allowed by law or allowed without a prescription. For phones, there are sometimes "hardened" or "ruggedized" versions which are designed to survive harsher environmental conditions such as surviving drops and collisions, excessive water, dust, etc. So Maximum strength could indicate a "ruggedized" phone, though a screen that extended past the edges would likely have the opposite effect.

; Never needs sharpening
: Phones do not need to be sharpened in the first place{{Citation needed}}. This is a feature more likely to be found in a knife advertisement (especially for a knife that cannot be sharpened, like a serrated or ceramic blade), or on a mechanical pencil.
But since the screen goes past the edge, it might be sharp enough to cut through things, much like a knife. Note that this feature combination would prevent the phone from safe handling and carrying it in your pockets.

; Can survive up to 30 minutes out of water
: This is a play on the common IP-rating of water resistance, which is typically rated for submersion to a rated depth for 30 minutes. A phone which could only be used or carried for 30 minutes and then needed to be immersed in water would be rather inconvenient, especially if it was still susceptible to short-circuiting as most electronic devices do when submerged. On the other hand, perhaps this phone's target market are whales and dolphins. This would be a useful feature for them.

; Exclusive Audubon Society app identifies birds and lets you control their flight
: {{w|National Audubon Society}} is a non-profit organization dedicated to conservation of nature, mainly of birds, also organizing open {{w|birdwatching}} events. An app that identifies bird species, as for example from a photo of a bird made by the smartphone itself, would be cool. An app allowing you to control the bird's flight would be way cooler, but it is not possible with current technology - and it would fly in the face of the Audubon Society core activity. This is a reference to {{w|Unmanned_aerial_vehicle|drones}} (artificial "birds") which are often controlled by a smartphone app. This may also be a reference to [[1425: Tasks]], in which an app that can recognize if a bird is on camera is proposed.

; Extra screen
:Possibly because of the center camera, an additional section of screen was added. Some phones also advertise having extra screen, although this refers to having a larger screen in general, rather than a small rectangle added to the bottom.

; Wireless charging port
:A rather pointless feature; because wireless charging has no wires, it needs no port. (Unless it is required for fuel for a fuel cell. See clean coal, below.) This may be a play on Apple's removal of headphone port from their previous phones.

; Safe for ages 6-8 months, 10 months, 18 months-3 years, and 12 years and older
:Usually an item is deemed safe for a particular age or older, or (in the case of toys) is recommended for a particular age range. This is unusual in that it's a hodge-podge of age ranges with no apparent reason why some ages are safe and others are not. It may be a parody of drug commercials that list several age ranges for which the drug had to be separately approved.

; Screen goes past the edge
:A parody of the trend of "edge to edge" displays in recent generations of smartphones, or phones whose screens curve partway around the edge of the phone.

; High thread count CPU
:A CPU thread is a task the CPU performs. Several threads may share memory making them a process. Threads are meant to run in parallel and the operating system distributes the workload on the available hardware execution units. These execution units are sometimes called hardware threads, especially when there is more than one per processing unit (or core). For example, the Intel Core i7 7700 is considered a 4-core, 8-thread CPU. The vague "high thread count" statement could make sense in this context, however, it is most likely a joke about bedding, where it is an actual selling point. High thread count is a marketing term for linens, where it signifies the density of threads in a textile.

; Shroud of Turin-style facial transfer unlock
:The {{w|Shroud of Turin}} contains an image of a face -- originally believed to be of {{w|Jesus Christ}}, before the Shroud was found to be 1200 years too young. Presumably, to unlock this phone, the user would have to physically {{w|facepalm|press their face}} against the phone, the way Shroud-Man's image was allegedly transferred to the shroud. This is likely a reference to the iPhone X's FaceID unlock, which uses a ''photograph'' of your face augmented with spatial information to unlock it and which had attracted [https://www.wired.com/story/iphone-x-faceid-security/ significant criticism] immediately before this comic came out.

; Fonts developed by NASA
: Between 1975 and 1992 NASA used the {{w|NASA insignia|"worm" logotype}} in its insignia. It was a special font omitting the horizontal bar in the capitalized letter A. May be a reference to many advertisements that claim their product uses technology developed by NASA. This seems impressive, as NASA technology does tend to be quite strong and advanced, as they claim at their [https://spinoff.nasa.gov/ spin off] website. However, it would not be as impressive due to fonts having very little to do with NASA's core operations.

; Includes applicator
: What tampon packages, cosmetics, paints, and other products often say. An applicator for a phone would be absurd since the phone cannot be applied, spread, inserted, or attached to something else. This may be referring back to the aforementioned yearly vaccine.

; Burns clean coal
: There is marketing, trying to appear to be using clean energy, due to pollution concerns. Coal burning power plants are usually quite large, so a traditional coal fired thermal-electric plant in a cell phone would be absurd. However, {{w|Fuel cell|fuel cells}}, which produce electricity by oxidizing some fuel can be small enough to fit in a cell phone, but they do not typically burn coal. Clean coal is coal that is burned so that it does not give off as much soot, sulphur dioxide, nitrogen oxides, mercury, or other pollutants as "normal" coal, or methods of burning coal that give off relatively less pollutants. (The cordless charging port might be receptacle for refueling the phone, using liquid, or using a fuel cartridge.)

; Pre-seasoned
:Pre-seasoned typically refers to cast iron cookware which is ready to use out of the box, as opposed to needing to season it with oil and heat. It can also refer to packaged meats which are ready to cook without needing to be seasoned with herbs and spices, or timber that has been dried and is ready for use.

; Broad-spectrum SPF 30
:The xkcd phone somehow gives a sun protection factor (SPF) 30 level of protection for the skin from sun light. Perhaps the phone itself blocks 97% of UVB radiation (this being the definition of "SPF 30"), allowing 3% through, although this would be remarkably more translucent than most phones (which allow much less than 1% of UVB, or any other visible or near-visible wavelength, through). This would only apply to the patch of skin it blocks sunlight from.

; College-ruled
:College-ruled is a style of notebook paper having narrower lines in order to fit more text per page. That the phone is college-ruled suggests that there are lines permanently displayed on the screen, which would obscure any images on the screen, along with any text that doesn't line up with the lines. Defective screens can show similar patterns. For example, the iPhone 6 "touch disease" cause regularly spaced vertical lines to appear on top of the screen. Here, it is possible that the manufacturer tries to pass off screen defects as features.

; Sterile packaging
:Useful for medical supplies, less so in a phone.

; Radium backlight
:The discovery of the radioactive element radium sparked a brief fad in which some watch makers painted watch faces or hands with a paint containing radium and a radioluminescent substance, such as zinc sulfide, which converted the radiation from the radium into visible light. This allowed the time to be read at night without an external power source for the light. However, it was eventually realized that regular exposure to radium could result in radiation poisoning, particularly for the workers assembling and painting the watches. A radium-based backlight would therefore be both potentially dangerous (especially for an object carried on one's person much of the time) but also largely useless, as the radioluminescent light is rather dim compared to conventional phone back lights.

; 4K pixels (50×80)
:This refers to having 4,000 pixels in the screen in total, rather than a screen width of ~4000 pixels. TVs advertised as "4K" are typically up to 4096 × 2160 pixels, or 8.8 million pixels. That would be outstanding for a cell phone whereas 4,000 pixels total would be horrendous. As a comparison, the old Commodore VIC-20 with a resolution of 176 × 184 would have over 8 times the pixels of this phone. It is however quite close to the screen resolution of the sturdy Nokia 3310, boasting a total of 4032 pixels positioned 84 × 48.

In the caption below the phone [[Randall]] presents many different version numbers:
*The number 6 is in correct order of all the xkcd phones
*The {{w|Roman numerals|roman number}} VIII refers to the newly announced {{w|iPhone 8}} and jokes about the roman number X below
*Version number 10 is the current version of Microsoft Windows
*The {{w|iPhone X}} was announced together with the iPhone 8 by Apple on September 12, 2017, a day before this comic was released. Apple clarified X must be read as the roman number 10, so for additional absurdity two xkcd phones share the same number, using different numeral
*The number 26 refers to the number of letters in the English alphabet
*In the year 1876 {{w|Alexander Graham Bell}} received the U.S. Patent No. 174465 for the {{w|invention of the telephone}}, but there is still a {{w|Elisha Gray and Alexander Bell telephone controversy|controversy}} whether {{w|Elisha Gray}} was the first who presented a working telephone.
Below these numbers Randall states that xkcd isn't responsible for this ''nonconsecutive version number war'', but, as it can be seen here above, he attempts to win. By counting parallel version numbers xkcd defeated Apple 6:2. The "nonconsecutive version number war" refers to several recent phones, and possibly operating systems, released consecutively with nonconsecutive version numbers, including:
*The iPhone X (or Ten) which will be released shortly after the iPhone 8
*The Samsung Galaxy Note 7 was released after the Note 5
*The Oneplus 5 was released after the OnePlus 3T
*Microsoft Windows 10 was released after Microsoft Windows 8, officially skipping Microsoft Windows 9

The symbols at the end are ™ for trademark, ® for registered trademark, and © for a copyright protection. The degree symbol ° after the letter C could be a play with degree Celsius. The use of all four symbols after the phrase is ridiculous, as ™ and ® indicate trademarks with opposite registration statuses, slogans can't be copyrighted, and the degree symbol usually has no meaning when applied to text.

In the title text Randall attributes privacy concerns about the facial recognition feature. A picture of a face will only be used for facial recognition, but never stored on the device nor transmitted to internet. A ''small'' side effect may be that the famous selfie pictures aren't possible anymore, as well as video calls.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[A smartphone is shown, the screen is slightly wider than the case, in the middle is a photo lens, and at the right bottom a small extra part is added to the screen.]
:[On top a bracket ranges nearly over the entire width of the case. The text reads:]
:Full-width rear camera
:[The label at the photo lens is:]
:Front camera (centered for eye contact during video chat)
:[The label on the extra part says:]
:Extra screen
:[At the bottom below the case a label reads:]
:Wireless charging port

:[The labels left to the phone are:]
:4k pixels (50x80)
:Radium backlight
:Sterile packaging
:College-ruled
:Broad spectrum SPF 30
:Pre-seasoned
:Burns clean coal
:Includes applicator
:Fonts developed by NASA
:Shroud of turn-style facial transfer unlock
:High thread count CPU
:Screen goes past the edge
:Safe for ages 6-8 months, 10 months, 18 months-3 years, and 12 years and older

:[The labels right to the phone are:]
:CDC partnership: Phone automatically administers seasonal flu vaccine to cheek every year
:12-function
:Dishwasher safe
:GPS transmitter
:3-G acceleration
:Portable, solar-heated
:Pore-cleaning strip
:Maximum strength
:Never needs sharpening
:Can survive up to 30 minutes out of water
:Exclusive Audubon Society app identifies birds and lets you control their flight

:[Text below the phone:]
:Introducing
:'''The XKCD PHONE 6, VIII, 10, X, 26, and 1876'''
:''We didn't start this nonconsecutive version number war, but we will not lose it.''™®©°
{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:xkcd Phones]]

1889: xkcd Phone 6

2017-09-18T20:35:33Z

WingedCat: /* List of features (clockwise from center/top) */

{{comic
| number = 1889
| date = September 13, 2017
| title = xkcd Phone 6
| image = xkcd_phone_6.png
| titletext = We understand your privacy concerns; be assured that our phones will never store or transmit images of your face.
}}

==Explanation==

This is the sixth entry in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone series]], released the day after Apple announced their new {{w|iPhone 8}} and the higher-end {{w|iPhone X}} (pronounced iPhone 10) with facial recognition features.

===List of features (clockwise from center/top)===

; Front camera (centered for eye contact during video chat)
: Front camera is a common feature of smartphones. The camera lens is located on the same side of the phone's case as the main screen and therefore it is possible to capture the image of the user's face looking at the screen and display the interlocutor's face on the screen simultaneously, enabling video chat. However, as the camera is usually located above the screen, a user looking at the displayed image of the other person directs his or her eyes at the center of the screen and not at the camera's lens. This is very visible on the other end of the chat as if the person talking was looking down and not in the interlocutor's face which is an uncomfortable situation for most people. For this reason, professionals involved in movie or TV-making, like actors or reporters, are trained to look straight into the camera's lens while talking, which creates impression of looking straight at the viewer's face. During a video chat, however, looking into the lens of an above-screen camera does not allow one to see the interlocutor's face clearly because it is then in the peripheral field of vision.

: To solve this conundrum, Randall proposes locating the camera lens right in the middle of the screen. Therefore the user looking at the screen to see the other person's face would be also looking at the lens, creating an impression of a straight look on the other end of the chat. This is absurd since the lens would then take place of some of the center pixels of the screen, not allowing the display the center part of the captured image of the other person's face (like eyes and/or lips) which is most important for nonverbal communication. Such location of the camera lens would also likely interfere with touch-screen function. It will make other applications on the phone difficult to use, since virtually no user interface is designed to accommodate for a blind spot in the center.

; Full-width rear camera
: Phone cameras tend to have lenses which are quite small and round or square -- same width as height. Full-width makes it sound like the camera lens is really wide, as in a long oval or rectangle shape. This could allow the camera to gather a lot more light, potentially working in low light situations. However the lens would be more vulnerable to damage and dirt. Unless a very large sensor was used, focusing the image could be a problem, since cell phones are typically not very deep.

; CDC partnership - phone automatically administers seasonal flu vaccine to cheek every year
: U.S. {{w|Centers for Disease Control and Prevention}} is a government agency tasked with addressing public health concerns such as infectious diseases, including seasonal flu. A common way of limiting spread of an infectious disease is {{w|Vaccine|vaccination}}, which most often involves administering a specially prepared medicine via an {{w|intramuscular injection}}. Researchers have investigated other delivery systems, including aerosol, or microneedle injection. This features implies that the phone would automatically perform some form of injection once a year, administering vaccine via a small aperture while the user is holding the phone to his or her cheek during a call. However, the placement of this component is unusual as it would line up with the user's ear rather than cheek during a phone call.

; 12-function
: Most smartphones can be used for more than 12 different things{{Citation needed}}. However, this may refer to the 12 basic functions of algebra (identity, squaring, cubing, square root, logarithm, exponential, reciprocal, sine, cosine, greatest integer, absolute value, and logistic), or the twelve function keys on a modern keyboard (more than the ten on the original IBM PC keyboard). Alternatively it may be a reference to calculators: basic models are sometimes referred to as four function calculators (addition, subtraction, multiplication and division), and complex scientific calculators may advertise 250 or more functions.

; Dishwasher safe
: Usually a feature of plastic containers or fancy dishes. Unlikely to appear on a smartphone, though potentially useful if you need to clean your screen. This feature may be a reference to [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPGY2T9r1Ok this Knallerfrauen sketch] where an elderly user puts an iPad into a dishwasher to clean it.

; GPS transmitter
: Many smartphones have a receiver for the Global Positioning System, which allows a phone to compute its position based on signals from the constellation(s) of GPS satellites. However, a device with a "GPS transmitter" would broadcast signals that would interfere with the GPS receivers of all devices nearby. This might be used in some form of differential GPS, broadcasting signals from a known location to allow more precise determination of other locations. Or such a system might be used to confuse or control devices, such as drones, which navigate using GPS.

; 3-G acceleration
: This may be a mixing of 3-D acceleration, which refers to graphics, accelerometers, which are a common feature of modern smartphones that allows them to detect movement, and 3G, referring to communications systems. {{w|Graphics processing unit|Three-d acceleration hardware}} speeds up handling of spatial data, such as generating pictures of a simulated environment. Usually, a phone is {{w|3G|3G compatible}} if it uses a certain standard ("third generation") for data communication. However, 3-G acceleration implies the phone can accelerate at a rate of 3 times the acceleration of gravity, or approximately 30 m/s². An untrained human experiencing 3G for extensive periods of time can suffer injuries as a result, as can an untrained phone.

; Portable, solar-heated
: Portability is pretty much the entire point of using a ''mobile'' phone, so advertising portability is rather pointless. Solar ''power'' charging could be a very useful feature on a phone, but solar ''heating'' usually applies to plumbing, where a water tank is heated by the sun and used to supply hot water to taps. Technically, as the sun heats up everything it shines on, the phone is in fact solar heated.

;Pore-cleaning strip
: Presumably this would be part of the ''Shroud of Turin-style facial transfer unlock'', where the phone would use the dirt and oils collected from the user's face being pressed against the phone to to verify their identity. Something sticky on that location would be very annoying for clean-shaven people and extremely painful for anyone with facial hair. See also [[777: Pore Strips]]

; Maximum strength
: Medicines are often sold as "Maximum strength", as in the highest dose allowed by law or allowed without a prescription. For phones, there are sometimes "hardened" or "ruggedized" versions which are designed to survive harsher environmental conditions such as surviving drops and collisions, excessive water, dust, etc. So Maximum strength could indicate a "ruggedized" phone, though a screen that extended past the edges would likely have the opposite effect.

; Never needs sharpening
: Phones do not need to be sharpened in the first place{{Citation needed}}. This is a feature more likely to be found in a knife advertisement (especially for a knife that cannot be sharpened, like a serrated or cera
mic blade), or on a mechanical pencil.
But since the screen goes past the edge, it might be sharp enough to cut through things, much like a knife. Note that this feature combination would prevent the phone from safe handling and carrying it in your pockets.

; Can survive up to 30 minutes out of water
: This is a play on the common IP-rating of water resistance, which is typically rated for submersion to a rated depth for 30 minutes. A phone which could only be used or carried for 30 minutes and then needed to be immersed in water would be rather inconvenient, especially if it was still susceptible to short-circuiting as most electronic devices do when submerged. On the other hand, perhaps this phone's target market are whales and dolphins. This would be a useful feature for them.

; Exclusive Audubon Society app identifies birds and lets you control their flight
: {{w|National Audubon Society}} is a non-profit organization dedicated to conservation of nature, mainly of birds, also organizing open {{w|birdwatching}} events. An app that identifies bird species, as for example from a photo of a bird made by the smartphone itself, would be cool. An app allowing you to control the bird's flight would be way cooler, but it is not possible with current technology - and it would fly in the face of the Audubon Society core activity. This is a reference to {{w|Unmanned_aerial_vehicle|drones}} (artificial "birds") which are often controlled by a smartphone app. This may also be a reference to [[1425: Tasks]], in which an app that can recognize if a bird is on camera is proposed.

; Extra screen
:Possibly because of the center camera, an additional section of screen was added. Some phones also advertise having extra screen, although this refers to having a larger screen in general, rather than a small rectangle added to the bottom.

; Wireless charging port
:A rather pointless feature; because wireless charging has no wires, it needs no port. (Unless it is required for fuel for a fuel cell. See clean coal, below.) This may be a play on Apple's removal of headphone port from their previous phones.

; Safe for ages 6-8 months, 10 months, 18 months-3 years, and 12 years and older
:Usually an item is deemed safe for a particular age or older, or (in the case of toys) is recommended for a particular age range. This is unusual in that it's a hodge-podge of age ranges with no apparent reason why some ages are safe and others are not. It may be a parody of drug commercials that list several age ranges for which the drug had to be separately approved.

; Screen goes past the edge
:A parody of the trend of "edge to edge" displays in recent generations of smartphones, or phones whose screens curve partway around the edge of the phone.

; High thread count CPU
:A CPU thread is a task the CPU performs. Several threads may share memory making them a process. Threads are meant to run in parallel and the operating system distributes the workload on the available hardware execution units. These execution units are sometimes called hardware threads, especially when there is more than one per processing unit (or core). For example, the Intel Core i7 7700 is considered a 4-core, 8-thread CPU. The vague "high thread count" statement could make sense in this context, however, it is most likely a joke about bedding, where it is an actual selling point. High thread count is a marketing term for linens, where it signifies the density of threads in a textile.

; Shroud of Turin-style facial transfer unlock
:The {{w|Shroud of Turin}} contains an image of a face -- originally believed to be of {{w|Jesus Christ}}, before the Shroud was found to be 1200 years too young. Presumably, to unlock this phone, the user would have to physically {{w|facepalm|press their face}} against the phone, the way Shroud-Man's image was allegedly transferred to the shroud. This is likely a reference to the iPhone X's FaceID unlock, which uses a ''photograph'' of your face augmented with spatial information to unlock it and which had attracted [https://www.wired.com/story/iphone-x-faceid-security/ significant criticism] immediately before this comic came out.

; Fonts developed by NASA
: Between 1975 and 1992 NASA used the {{w|NASA insignia|"worm" logotype}} in its insignia. It was a special font omitting the horizontal bar in the capitalized letter A. May be a reference to many advertisements that claim their product uses technology developed by NASA. This seems impressive, as NASA technology does tend to be quite strong and advanced, as they claim at their [https://spinoff.nasa.gov/ spin off] website. However, it would not be as impressive due to fonts having very little to do with NASA's core operations.

; Includes applicator
: What tampon packages, cosmetics, paints, and other products often say. An applicator for a phone would be absurd since the phone cannot be applied, spread, inserted, or attached to something else. This may be referring back to the aforementioned yearly vaccine.

; Burns clean coal
: There is marketing, trying to appear to be using clean energy, due to pollution concerns. Coal burning power plants are usually quite large, so a traditional coal fired thermal-electric plant in a cell phone would be absurd. However, {{w|Fuel cell|fuel cells}}, which produce electricity by oxidizing some fuel can be small enough to fit in a cell phone, but they do not typically burn coal. Clean coal is coal that is burned so that it does not give off as much soot, sulphur dioxide, nitrogen oxides, mercury, or other pollutants as "normal" coal, or methods of burning coal that give off relatively less pollutants. (The cordless charging port might be receptacle for refueling the phone, using liquid, or using a fuel cartridge.)

; Pre-seasoned
:Pre-seasoned typically refers to cast iron cookware which is ready to use out of the box, as opposed to needing to season it with oil and heat. It can also refer to packaged meats which are ready to cook without needing to be seasoned with herbs and spices, or timber that has been dried and is ready for use.

; Broad-spectrum SPF 30
:The xkcd phone somehow gives a sun protection factor (SPF) 30 level of protection for the skin from sun light. Perhaps the phone itself blocks 97% of UVB radiation (this being the definition of "SPF 30"), allowing 3% through, although this would be remarkably more translucent than most phones (which allow much less than 1% of UVB, or any other visible or near-visible wavelength, through). This would only apply to the patch of skin it blocks sunlight from.

; College-ruled
:College-ruled is a style of notebook paper having narrower lines in order to fit more text per page. That the phone is college-ruled suggests that there are lines permanently displayed on the screen, which would obscure any images on the screen, along with any text that doesn't line up with the lines. Defective screens can show similar patterns. For example, the iPhone 6 "touch disease" cause regularly spaced vertical lines to appear on top of the screen. Here, it is possible that the manufacturer tries to pass off screen defects as features.

; Sterile packaging
:Useful for medical supplies, less so in a phone.

; Radium backlight
:The discovery of the radioactive element radium sparked a brief fad in which some watch makers painted watch faces or hands with a paint containing radium and a radioluminescent substance, such as zinc sulfide, which converted the radiation from the radium into visible light. This allowed the time to be read at night without an external power source for the light. However, it was eventually realized that regular exposure to radium could result in radiation poisoning, particularly for the workers assembling and painting the watches. A radium-based backlight would therefore be both potentially dangerous (especially for an object carried on one's person much of the time) but also largely useless, as the radioluminescent light is rather dim compared to conventional phone back lights.

; 4K pixels (50×80)
:This refers to having 4,000 pixels in the screen in total, rather than a screen width of ~4000 pixels. TVs advertised as "4K" are typically up to 4096 × 2160 pixels, or 8.8 million pixels. That would be outstanding for a cell phone whereas 4,000 pixels total would be horrendous. As a comparison, the old Commodore VIC-20 with a resolution of 176 × 184 would have over 8 times the pixels of this phone. It is however quite close to the screen resolution of the sturdy Nokia 3310, boasting a total of 4032 pixels positioned 84 × 48.

In the caption below the phone [[Randall]] presents many different version numbers:
*The number 6 is in correct order of all the xkcd phones
*The {{w|Roman numerals|roman number}} VIII refers to the newly announced {{w|iPhone 8}} and jokes about the roman number X below
*Version number 10 is the current version of Microsoft Windows
*The {{w|iPhone X}} was announced together with the iPhone 8 by Apple on September 12, 2017, a day before this comic was released. Apple clarified X must be read as the roman number 10, so for additional absurdity two xkcd phones share the same number, using different numeral
*The number 26 refers to the number of letters in the English alphabet
*In the year 1876 {{w|Alexander Graham Bell}} received the U.S. Patent No. 174465 for the {{w|invention of the telephone}}, but there is still a {{w|Elisha Gray and Alexander Bell telephone controversy|controversy}} whether {{w|Elisha Gray}} was the first who presented a working telephone.
Below these numbers Randall states that xkcd isn't responsible for this ''nonconsecutive version number war'', but, as it can be seen here above, he attempts to win. By counting parallel version numbers xkcd defeated Apple 6:2. The "nonconsecutive version number war" refers to several recent phones, and possibly operating systems, released consecutively with nonconsecutive version numbers, including:
*The iPhone X (or Ten) which will be released shortly after the iPhone 8
*The Samsung Galaxy Note 7 was released after the Note 5
*The Oneplus 5 was released after the OnePlus 3T
*Microsoft Windows 10 was released after Microsoft Windows 8, officially skipping Microsoft Windows 9

The symbols at the end are ™ for trademark, ® for registered trademark, and © for a copyright protection. The degree symbol ° after the letter C could be a play with degree Celsius. The use of all four symbols after the phrase is ridiculous, as ™ and ® indicate trademarks with opposite registration statuses, slogans can't be copyrighted, and the degree symbol usually has no meaning when applied to text.

In the title text Randall attributes privacy concerns about the facial recognition feature. A picture of a face will only be used for facial recognition, but never stored on the device nor transmitted to internet. A ''small'' side effect may be that the famous selfie pictures aren't possible anymore, as well as video calls.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[A smartphone is shown, the screen is slightly wider than the case, in the middle is a photo lens, and at the right bottom a small extra part is added to the screen.]
:[On top a bracket ranges nearly over the entire width of the case. The text reads:]
:Full-width rear camera
:[The label at the photo lens is:]
:Front camera (centered for eye contact during video chat)
:[The label on the extra part says:]
:Extra screen
:[At the bottom below the case a label reads:]
:Wireless charging port

:[The labels left to the phone are:]
:4k pixels (50x80)
:Radium backlight
:Sterile packaging
:College-ruled
:Broad spectrum SPF 30
:Pre-seasoned
:Burns clean coal
:Includes applicator
:Fonts developed by NASA
:Shroud of turn-style facial transfer unlock
:High thread count CPU
:Screen goes past the edge
:Safe for ages 6-8 months, 10 months, 18 months-3 years, and 12 years and older

:[The labels right to the phone are:]
:CDC partnership: Phone automatically administers seasonal flu vaccine to cheek every year
:12-function
:Dishwasher safe
:GPS transmitter
:3-G acceleration
:Portable, solar-heated
:Pore-cleaning strip
:Maximum strength
:Never needs sharpening
:Can survive up to 30 minutes out of water
:Exclusive Audubon Society app identifies birds and lets you control their flight

:[Text below the phone:]
:Introducing
:'''The XKCD PHONE 6, VIII, 10, X, 26, and 1876'''
:''We didn't start this nonconsecutive version number war, but we will not lose it.''™®©°
{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:xkcd Phones]]

1882: Color Models

2017-09-06T20:21:48Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */ Color is one thing, but stripes could be measured by their boundary.

{{comic
| number = 1882
| date = August 28, 2017
| title = Color Models
| image = color_models.png
| titletext = What if what *I* see as blue, *you* see as a slightly different blue because you're using Chrome instead of Firefox and despite a decade of messing with profiles we STILL can't get this right somehow.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Randall]] is describing how his level of understanding of colors has changed by age. The chart starts with two tracks of understanding color.

In grade school he learned about the primary colors, and the very simple model of colors, as shown in the left track. Mixing of color solids, as in painting (or finger painting being probably the earliest exposure to color mixing), is intuitive for a child. The process is subtractive, and the more colors you mix the darker and closer to black you get. Color is seen by the eyes when light bounces off the solid colors and becomes light of different wavelengths that the eye can then see. However at this level, things just "look" like different colors without understanding light's role.

The right track is about mixing of colored light, as in prisms and light waves, where mixing colors is additive and the more you mix the lighter and closer to white you get. But this is without a real understanding of light bouncing off surfaces, and is limited to an understanding of different colors of light and how they mix. The first exposure in grade school is usually by shining white light through a prism to separate it into the different visible colors.

Meanwhile, philosophically, color is unknowable because it's impossible to say if everyone has the same qualia for colors. E.g. "Maybe what I see as blue, you see as my idea of purple."

The {{w|Opponent process|opponent color model}} connects these two models, by considering how the signals from rods and cones are processed, after different wavelengths of light are absorbed by different rods and cones in the eyes.

The "complex multidimensional gamut" mentions two more models: {{w|CIE 1931 color space|CIE 1931}} and {{w|Lab color space|L*a*b*}}. These are more detailed models based on the opponent color model, which precisely define how a particular color maps to the different channels that our eyes see.

However, understanding how the eye sees color ''still'' isn't enough, because not every device can display all the colors your eye can see. Your laptop might have a different {{w|Gamut|gamut}} from that of your phone, and when you print the page, you might see yet another color. To handle this issue, web browsers use "color profiles", so that an image can be tagged with the color space it uses and the browser can handle it appropriately. Unfortunately, browsers do this inconsistently and not very well.

Further complicating the matter, ostensibly identical device may show colors differently (depending on how they are adjusted, variations between devices, aging of the device, and the viewing environment). Devices and software exist to attempt to match systems to reproduce colors consistently, however most systems are not set up this way, color correction can be complicated, and the corrections have to be frequently readjusted.

The "hyperdimensional four-sided quantum Klein manifold" is a joke, and could also be a pun upon the color {{w|International Klein Blue|Klein Blue}}. A ''Klein manifold'' is described by the {{w|Klein bottle}}, where the bottle was originally a surface (a mix-up of the German words Fläche for surface and Flasche for bottle). It is a two-dimensional manifold, or simply just a surface with some special characteristics. Randall is here projecting an "abstract multidimensional gamut" onto an even more complicated surface, presumably in order to eliminate the errors in color rendering caused by previous attempts to eliminate the errors in color rendering. The Klein bottle has to be projected into 4 dimensional (4-D) space for this to work, as it would otherwise intersect with itself.
The “quantum” may be a reference to the "color" charge in {{w|Quantum chromodynamics}}.

Eventually it appears Randall has given up, realizing color is very difficult and hoping somebody else will deal with the difficulty in describing, understanding and using the concept of colors.

The title text expands on this joke, implying that the reason for the "unknowable" answer in the cartoon is that everyone's browser shows colors slightly differently. Despite the complexity and thoroughness of color models, this common software can't get it right.

==Transcript==
:[A simple flowchart is shown. The text above the panel reads:]
:Evolution of my understanding of color over time:

:[On the left side is a vertical dashed line in gray, on top it's labeled:]
:Grade school
:[And at the bottom the label reads:]
:Now

:[Header above the chart:]
:"Color" is...

:[The chart starts with three items, one left and an other on the right, a third is below in the middle.]
:...three primary colors mixed together
:...a rainbow, and each color is a wavelength
:...unknowable ("maybe what ''I'' see as blue, ''you'' see as...")

:[Arrows from the left and the middle item point to a new left one, while two other arrows from the middle and the right item lead to one at the right.]
:...three-ish primary colors mixed together (RGB/RYB/CMYK)
:...a mix of infinite wavelengths filtered through three eye pigments

:[The arrows of both items point to one in the middle:]
:(something about the opponent color model)

:[The remaining items are all in the middle and each is connected by one arrow downwards to the next.]
:...an abstract multidimensional gamut (CIE 1931, L*a*b*, etc)
:...an abstract multidimensional gamut filtered through inconsistently-implemented device color profiles
:...a hyperdimensional four-sided quantum Klein manifold? Is that a thing?
:...hopefully somebody else's problem.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Flowcharts]]

1858: 4th of July

2017-07-06T21:16:45Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1858
| date = July 3, 2017
| title = 4th of July
| image = 4th_of_july.png
| titletext = Strangely, they still celebrate by eating hot dogs. Since they don't have mouths, they just kinda toss them in the air and let them fall back down into their propeller blades. It's pretty messy.
}}

==Explanation==
In the United States, the 4th of July is celebrated as {{w|Independence Day (United States)|Independence Day}}. This comic claims to show the timeline of different activities that are used to celebrate the holiday. One common activity is to watch fireworks displays. With the rise of personal drones there have been several videos of fireworks from drones, including flying the drones through the middle of the display. The comic then purports that starting in the year it was published (2017), fireworks and drones will be at some sort of war with each other, starting with drone pilots leading their drones into the path of the rising fireworks before they explode, leading to fireworks technicians intentionally trying to strike down drones. In 2019, [[Randall]] posits that the drones will be weaponized with fireworks and competitions will be held to shoot down your opponents' drone. This wanton destruction of drones leads them to turn against their pilots and humanity in 2020 (after gaining sentience, presumably by their AI evolving through the competition), and then in 2021, they will be celebrating their Independence Day from the humans.

The title text refers to another popular 4th of July activity in the United States: Barbecues with fare such as hot dogs and hamburgers. But since the drones don't have mouths or a digestive tract, they simply make a mess by using their rotors as a blender.

==Transcript==
:[One single panel is shown. The header reads:]
:'''4th of July activities'''

:2014 - Watching fireworks
:2015 - Watching fireworks from drones
:2016 - Flying drones through fireworks
:2017 - Intercepting fireworks with drones
:2018 - Competitions to hit drones with fireworks
:2019 - Teams compete to shoot down each other's firework-armed drones
:2020 - Sentient firework-armed drones overthrow humans
:2021 - Drones celebrate independence day

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Drones]]

1825: 7 Eleven

2017-04-17T22:58:27Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1825
| date = April 17, 2017
| title = 7 Eleven
| image = 7_eleven.png
| titletext = Really, the only honest 24-hour stores are the ones in places like Arizona and Hawaii, and many of them are still wrong in certain years.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Basic Explanation. Needs more. Solar day vs. sidereal day? Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
This comic pokes fun at the idiosyncrasies of time keeping. Since units of time are intimately tied to a planet's rotation, and planets rotate at different, inconsistent rates, time keeping doesn't always follow a simple pattern.

Many stores advertise being open 24/7, which means that they're open all day, every day. Many locations of the convenience store chain {{w|7-Eleven}} are now "open 24 hours", again meaning they are always open (despite historically being open only from 7 AM and 11 PM local time, hence its name).

The main joke in the comic refers to the fact that a {{w|Timekeeping_on_Mars#Time_of_day|day on Mars}} (the time it takes for Mars to make a full revolution on its own axis) is about 24 hours and 37 minutes of Earth time. If a 7-11 store is open for literally 24 Earth hours per Mars day, then it would actually be closed for around 37 minutes each day. Of course, this is only an issue if Earth and Mars time units are mixed. Had the sign implicitly referred to 24 Mars-hours (where one Mars-hour is defined as 1/24 of a Mars day), then the store would be open for the entire Mars day.

The duration for the Martian day used by [[Randall]] is the Martian {{w|sidereal day}} (how long it takes the non-Sun stars to get to the same position in the sky) of 24 hours, 37 minutes, and 22.663 seconds. However, Mars exploration missions use the Martian {{w|solar day}} (how long it takes the Sun to get to the same position in the sky) or {{w|Timekeeping_on_Mars#Sols|''sol''}} of 24 hours, 39 minutes, and 35.244 seconds. Thus in practice, the 7-11 store would be closed for 39 minutes daily instead of 37 minutes. Likewise, Earth time usually refers to solar days; a typical (mean) sidereal Earth day is 23 hours, 56 minutes, 4.0916 seconds long.

The first part of the title text refers to {{w|Daylight_saving_time|daylight saving time}} (DST), where days can be shortened or lengthened on predefined days of the year in order to maximize use of available sunlight. In the United States, most places set clocks forward by one hour on the second Sunday of March, resulting in a 23-hour day, and back again on the first Sunday of November, resulting in a 25-hour day. Thus technically, even a 7-11 in the US would not truly be open "24 hours" every day. Arizona and Hawaii are called out as exceptions because they do not observe daylight saving time (except on the Navajo reservation in Arizona). Randall has made fun of DST [[:Category:Daylight saving time|several times before]], and once again he shows his disdain for DST by saying only the two states not using DST are honest. This comic came out over a month after DST began in the US.

The second part of the title text refers to {{w|leap seconds}}, which are sometimes added to the end of a month in order to synchronize time with Earth's actual rotation. Months with a leap second will see its last day being one second longer than 24 hours. Since leap seconds apply to all Earth-based clocks, any store on Earth would not technically be open for exactly 24 hours on such days. Alternatively, a negative leap second would result in a day one second shorter than 24 hours. So far, all leap seconds have been positive, and given the slowing of the Earth's rotation it is unlikely that a negative leap second will ever occur. Leap seconds have been referred to before in the title text of [[1514: PermaCal]].

==Transcript==
:[A person in a spacesuit is trying in vain to open the door to a convenience store, rattling the handle. Behind him stands a tall post with a big 7-eleven logo at the top and the opening hours on a bar below the logo.]
:Sign: 7-Eleven
:Bar: Open 24 hours
:Door: ''Rattle rattle''

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I'm glad they finally opened a 7-Eleven here on Mars, but it's annoying how it closes for 37 minutes every day.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Space]]
[[Category:Daylight saving time]]

1801: Decision Paralysis

2017-02-22T19:52:13Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1801
| date = February 20, 2017
| title = Decision Paralysis
| image = decision_paralysis.png
| titletext = Good point--making no decision is itself a decision. So that's a THIRD option I have to research!
}}

==Explanation==
This comic illustrates a common problem in the internet era where, with the wealth of knowledge available to us at all times, one puts undue weight on otherwise arbitrary decisions.

This is taken to a comedic extreme by showing how [[Cueball]] is unable to make a critical, time-sensitive choice without putting hours of research in to justify it. Any benefit to researching the imminent decision of "which car will get us to our destination fastest" will be more than offset by the time it takes to make that decision. The inability to make a snap judgment in this case will prove to be equally as destructive as the bomb mentioned by [[Megan]], which will likely have detonated before they get to their base.

In the caption below the comic [[Randall]] gives the reader one of his recurring [[:Category:Protip|protips]]. In the tip, he reveals a weakness for his potential opponents to exploit([[1800: Chess Notation|??]]). Randall admits to having the same problems with decision-making as Cueball, and suggests that if he were placed in an equally urgent situation testing his (in)ability to choose, he would fail just as spectacularly. As the old saying goes, "give 'em enough rope, and they'll hang themselves"; in this case, give Randall enough internet access, and he'll get caught in an indefinite research loop.

This is not the first time that Randall has made a comic that tells his readers how to trick him (or his friends) like in [[1121: Identity]], where he notes how to get his password from a friend.

The title text continues this absurdity by bringing a third option to the table, the choice of inaction (which by wasting his time on calculations and research, Cueball has taken), a choice here that seems unacceptable, but the time spent mentioning (and researching it) simply adds to that already spent researching the two cars. Of course this option ensures that they are not killed when the bomb explodes, because they will not be anywhere close to the base. That might make it the only reasonable choice left after wasting so much time pondering which car to steal.

That not making a choice is also a choice, has often been mentioned in literature and other places, like when the band {{w|Rush (band)|Rush}} in their song {{w|Freewill (song)|Freewill}}, sings "If you choose not to decide - You still have made a choice".

The difference in time/effort needed to steal either car is likely presumed to be insignificant to this scenario.

Supposing both of them know how to drive (and steal) a car, the best option in this situation is to leave the phone in the pocket and steal both cars, and see who gets there first to defuse the bomb. This would both ensure one of them reaches the base as quick as possible and at the same time resolve the problem of which car would be best for the problem. Of course that would also have defused the joke, [[No Pun Intended]]...

In [[1445: Efficiency]] Randall describes why he is so inefficient (again, demonstrating the option 3 beautifully,) and in [[309: Shopping Teams]] two nerds out shopping have to choose between two similar objects and end up in a similar situation, though without a deadly deadline.

[[356: Nerd Sniping]] portray a situation where a scientist forgets everything around him when presented with an interesting problem. However, here it is the solution to a math problem, not a choice between two similar options that "snipes" the scientist.

The problem of choosing between cars with different accelerations and top speeds is the center of the car customization mechanic introduced in the seventh installment of the {{w|Mario Kart}} series. It is known that Randall has played some version of the game, as it has become a [[:Category:Mario Kart|recurring theme]].

Although presented as joke, this is a very real problem in electronics design. ''{{w|Buridan’s principle}}'' by none other than {{w|Leslie Lamport}} [http://research.microsoft.com/users/lamport/pubs/buridan.pdf states]:
:A discrete decision based upon an input having a continuous range of values cannot be made within a bounded length of time.

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball are standing near two sporty cars. Megan points excitedly at the cars while Cueball looks at his smartphone.]
:Megan: There! If we steal one of those cars, we can get to the base and defuse the bomb!
:Cueball: Hmm, the one on the left accelerates faster but has a lower top speed.
:Cueball: Ooh, the right one has good traction control. Are the roads wet?

:[Caption below the frame:]
:Protip: If you ever need to defeat me, just give me two very similar options and unlimited internet access.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Protip]]
[[Category:Smartphones]]

1775: Things You Learn

2017-01-05T00:50:56Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */ Abusive relationship is almost lined up on the graph with stroke in terms of badness

{{comic
| number = 1775
| date = December 21, 2016
| title = Things You Learn
| image = things_you_learn.png
| titletext = Guess who has two thumbs and spent the night in an ER after trying to rescue a kitten that ran under his car at a stoplight and climbed up into the engine compartment? And, thanks to antibiotics, will continue having two thumbs? THIS GUY. (P.S. kitten is safe!)
}}

==Explanation==
This graph shows various items of information plotted by two criteria: a horizontal "How Bad Is It If You Don't Know [THING]" axis and a vertical "How Easy It Is To Grow Up Without Learning [THING]" axis. Specifically, the vertical axis measures roughly how likely the average person is to remain ignorant of a particular item. The horizontal axis measures the likelihood and severity of bad consequences arising from such ignorance.

The title text describes an encounter Randall had where a cat climbed into the engine compartment of his car. It probably serves as an explanation for the seemingly out of place point on the graph about how serious cat bites are. The "two thumbs" is a reference to a well known type of jokes among English speakers. One of the most frequent forms is one person interrupting another mid-speech and asking "what has two thumbs and doesn't give a f*ck? THIS GUY!", before pointing to themselves with their thumbs. The idea is that you only direct the attention to your thumbs so that they can point back to you, though mentioning the thumbs was not actually required except as a topic change. Randall plays on an inversion of this joke as he might not have been able to make it at all without the intervention of the ER people. So here the "who has two thumbs", is not a deceiving distraction out of a boring conversation, and the thumbs are actually the focus of the phrase.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! Ignorance is Bad !! Ignorance is Easy !! Information !! Comments
|-
| not bad || (very, very) easy || 100 digits of {{w|pi}} || Most people know pi to only a few digits (3.14 or 3.1416). The latter is accurate to almost one part in half a million, which is close enough for almost any practical purpose.
|-
| not bad || (very) easy || Lyrics to "{{w|We Didn't Start the Fire}}" || "We Didn't Start the Fire" is a 1989 hit song by Billy Joel. Its lyrics include brief, rapid-fire allusions to more than 100 headline events between 1949, the year of Joel's birth, and 1989. While the chorus is memorable, the verses of the song are just a list of people, events and random things from popular culture. The average person is somewhat more likely to know the lyrics to Billy Joel's 1989 hit song than 100 digits of pi, but not knowing them doesn't really have any serious consequences.
|-
| (very) bad || (very) easy || That cat bites are really serious and if bitten you need to wash the bite and call a doctor immediately || Most people assume that a cat bite is just a minor injury. In fact, it carries a fairly high risk of infection, which can be dangerous if not treated (by cleaning the bite to reduce the risk, and having a doctor examine the bite victim and apply additional treatments such as antibiotics if needed). At the same time, cat bites are quite rare, as cats default to their claws rather than their teeth when they need to attack something (not that cat claws are bacteria-free zones either, quite the opposite).
|-
| (very, very) bad || (very) easy || The red flags for an abusive relationship || It is fairly easy for someone to fall into a pattern of accepting abuse (particularly if the abuser is skilled at emotional manipulation) without realizing it, and the consequences can be mentally and physically devastating.
|-
| (very, very) bad || easy || The {{w|Stroke#Signs_and_symptoms|signs of a stroke}} || The symptoms of a {{w|stroke}} are somewhat variable, including facial drooping, arm weakness and slurred speech, depending on what areas of the brain are affected, and can be mistaken for other conditions. Identifying a stroke quickly and seeking treatment can make the difference between life and death, or between full recovery and permanent impairment.
|-
| bad || easy || Cough into your elbow, not your hand || Covering a cough with the inside of your elbow helps prevent spreading airborne germs and is generally recommended by medical organisations. Coughing into your hand deposits them onto your hand, where they are much more likely to be spread to another person (via handshake, food preparation, shared objects, etc)
|-
| not (too) bad || hard || How to ride a bike || Most children, especially in the United States[http://www.peopleforbikes.org/statistics/category/participation-statistics#youth], learn to ride a bike at a fairly young age. While this is a useful skill to know for both entertainment and transportation, it would generally not be terrible to not learn this skill, particularly if other forms of transporation are readily available.
|-
| not bad (at all) || hard || How to escape movie {{w|quicksand}} || Quicksand in movies is a common trope, and while its physics often differ from real quicksand, escaping from it is commonly done using similar methods (e.g., not struggling, which increases the quicksand's viscosity). Knowing how to escape from quicksand is important if you sink into it, which is a situation most people are very unlikely to encounter in real life. It is much more likely for characters in movies and TV shows, especially in the 1960s, to encounter and become mired in quicksand than for a real individual to do so as real quicksand is a rare occurrence in most climates on Earth.
|-
| not bad (at all) || (very) hard || Lyrics to "{{w|The Twelve Days of Christmas (song)|12 Days of Christmas}}" || Hearing the same Christmas songs over and over each year makes it hard not to learn the lyrics over time. However, the consequences of not doing so are minimal; at most, ignorance of popular culture may leave your friends [[1769|a bit surprised and dismayed]]. Note that this only refers to learning the lyrics of the "Twelve Days of Christmas," not learning all the lyrics. Most people do not know many of the combination once one gets substantially past five. It is very hard to avoid learning some of the lyrics (especially One and Five), but easy to not know many of the later random ones (such as Eight or Eleven).
|-
| not bad (at all) || (very, very) hard || {{w|Theme music|TV theme songs}} || Most children in developed countries grow up watching at least some television. Many of these television shows play the same theme song before the show starts, and many of these have catchy lyrics. Therefore, by repetition, most children will learn at least one of these growing up, and often many.
|-
| bad || hard || That you have to empty the dryer lint trap || A {{w|clothes dryer}} resembles a washing machine, using hot air to heat clothes so that the water evaporates more quickly.

The dryer's air exhaust and air filter get gradually covered with {{w|lint (material)|lint}} (a kind of dust composed mainly of fiber) and must be cleaned regularly. Failing to remove the lint can cause the dryer to stop working effectively, introduce lint back onto your clothes, or (in extreme cases) start a fire.
|-
| (very) bad || (very) hard || {{w|Stop, drop and roll}} || This is a technique to extinguish a fire on one's own clothing, and is frequently taught to children for safety. Not knowing it (or forgetting it in a panic when the situation arises) can result in severe burns that could have been avoided by following the recommendation.
|-
| (very) bad || (very) hard || That you have to pay taxes || Most residents of most countries are legally obligated to pay taxes to their government. Penalties for not doing so often include large fines, and possibly prison sentences. Fortunately, it is something that children hear about quite a bit so it is very difficult to grow up without learning that it must be done.
|-
|}

==Rankings==

100% not bad: not bad at all . . . 100%>not-badness≥50%: not bad . . . 50%>not-badness≥0%: not too bad

100% very bad: very, very bad . . . 100%>very badness≥50%: very bad . . . 50%>very badness>0%: bad

100% hard: very, very hard . . . 100%>hardness≥50%: very hard . . . 50%>hardness>0%: hard

100% easy: very, very easy . . . 100%>easiness≥50%: very easy . . . 50%>easiness≥0%: easy

==Transcript==
[A simple x and y graph, with the X labeled "how bad it is if you don't know {thing}", and you labeled "how easy it is to grow up without learning {thing}]

Points on graph from top to bottom on the left side of the x axis:

> 100 digits of pi
> Lyrics to ''We Didn't Start the Fire''
> How to ride a bike
> How to escape movie quicksand
> Lyrics to ''12 Days of Christmas''
> TV theme songs

Points on graph from top to bottom on the right side of the y axis:

> That cat bites are really serious and if bitten you should wash the bite and call a doctor immediately
> Red flags for an abusive relationship
> Signs for a stroke
> Cough into your elbow, not your hand
> That you have to empty the dryer lint trap
> Stop, drop, and roll
> That you have to pay taxes

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Charts]]

1770: UI Change

2016-12-12T22:06:35Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1770
| date = December 9, 2016
| title = UI Change
| image = ui_change.png
| titletext = I know they said this change is permanent, but surely when they hear how much we're complaining someone will find a way to change things back.
}}

==Explanation==
The system that sets out the way in which the user interacts with an app or program is called its "user interface" (UI). For an app, that may be the graphic design of the app, and commonly the nature and location of certain controls.

Sometimes, when websites and apps are updated, the UI is modified. This is often done to make space for new features or to make what the developer considers to be an improvement, to the look or efficiency of the app. Occasionally UIs are modified with no obvious goal in mind other than to make changes to give the illusion of improvement when no new features have been added, thus making them completely arbitrary.

Given that some users use some apps many times a day, users tend to learn and get used to the UI of common apps. [[Workflow|Whether or not these changes are good in the long term, users often complain]] because all the workflows they're familiar with have been changed, and often the software never tells you where buttons and other options have been moved to. On occasion, these changes actually make common tasks more difficult and slower to accomplish. For example, in {{w|iOS|iOS 10}}, on the quick access control panel (which formerly consisted of a single page of controls), moves the controls for music to a second page (accessed by an additional swipe). While this has a benefit of allowing more information about one's music to be displayed, it adds an additional step to the UI before one can control their music from the control panel. Changes also often require users to "unlearn" the automatic behavior they have in using the app (such as automatically moving to press a button in its old location).

Old people get to see during their lifetime ''lots'' of these kind of changes to the way they did things in the past, and they often don't see the reason why they are made, since the young people who make the changes have a different cultural environment that the elderly won't "get".

Also, just as young people like to complain about petty changes to apps, old people complain about the way their body starts to break down as they age. Muscle weakness makes tasks like opening doors and jars more difficult, the senses such as sight and hearing deteriorate, and mental processes such as memory and rationalization can become slower and less reliable. These have a far bigger impact on one's day-to-day ability to do tasks than a simple UI change.

The comment in the title text could refer to either user interface changes or the effects of aging. As for the former, when websites and programs make unpopular changes, users sometimes start petitions to have them reverted - for example, [http://www.pcworld.com/article/161752/facebook_users_against_redesign.html 1.7 million Facebook users] joined "Petition Against the New Facebook". Of course, they didn't get their way, and nowadays few will even remember the old Facebook layout. [[Cueball]]'s comment in the title text might refer to the fact that people naively believe that if they complain a lot about an undesired change on the UI of some app that is considered permanent, they might change it back, while in real life those complaints usually don't have any effect, just like the Facebook example given before.

As for the latter, there's no human with the power to undo the effects of aging yet{{Citation needed}}, and a petition to God would typically be called a prayer, rather than a petition. Scientific research on how to stop or reverse the effects of old age is ongoing, with limited successes but no indication that we're anywhere close to the ability to "change things back" by restoring an old person to full youthful vigor, nor that this will necessarily happen within the lifetime of anyone currently alive (though neither is it guaranteed not to happen{{Citation needed}}, but it will take a while if it does). There has always been a market for immortality, with many historical figures seeking it through alchemy, science, or magic, but as of yet, products claiming to grant it have all been shams. Perhaps Cueball is hoping that advancing technologies will become sufficient to keep him from experiencing the negative effects of old age at all, and that complaining about the situation might improve the pace of progress.

==Transcript==
[Cueball is doing something on his phone]

Cueball: Ugh, I hate when apps make arbitrary changes to their UI.

Cueball: Stuff I do all the time just got harder for no reason!

Off-Screen Voice: Man.

Off-Screen Voice: You are '''''not''''' gonna like getting old.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

1762: Moving Boxes

2016-12-03T01:11:55Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation of boxes */

{{comic
| number = 1762
| date = November 21, 2016
| title = Moving Boxes
| image = moving_boxes.png
| titletext = Later, when I remember that I'm calling movers, I frantically scribble over the labels and write 'NORMAL HOUSE STUFF' on all of them, which actually makes things worse.
}}

==Explanation==

[[Randall]] talks about moving boxes and not labeling them until he forgets what's in them. Since he doesn't know what's in them, he writes silly things on the boxes as a joke. Some things are unusual/unlikely (e.g. sand, hydrants, peat) and some are abstract/impossible (e.g. elves, taupe, dark matter). Several of the categories overlap confusingly; for instance, "sand" and "silt" and "dark matter" are all generally considered as "particles"; "membranes", "edges", and "shawls" are all kinds of "manifolds"; "hooves" are part of "bison"; "fog" contains "water"; and "triangles" consist of three "edges". Another way to interpret this comic is that Randall actually has these items (or at least some of them) in the boxes and has simply forgotten which boxes contain what.

According to the title text, when Randall remembers that he is calling movers, he frantically scribbles "Normal House Stuff" on all the boxes. He says this makes the situation worse, possibly because the movers see the scribble and become suspicious. Alternatively, labeling every box with the exact same phrase will make it even harder to figure out what they contain and where they should go in the new dwelling.

===Explanation of boxes===
{| class="wikitable" width="100%"
!Label
!Explanation
|-
!Box 1
|-
|Grids|| [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/grid Grids] are mathematical drawings; they would be constructed by drawing them, not stored in a box (though {{w|graph paper}} might be). May refer to a classic {{w|snipe hunt}} where a hazing victim is tasked with finding "a box of grid squares".
|-
|Bison||{{w|Bison}}, sometimes mistakenly called buffalo, are large animals that would probably not fit in the box{{Citation needed}}.
|-
|Checkerboards||The tabletop gaming boards on which one plays {{w|English draughts|Checkers}}. It is also the name of the corresponding pattern, and thus can be interpreted as an abstract term like many other "objects" in this comic.
|-
|Fog||{{w|Fog}} is essentially low-lying clouds which, being gaseous, are hard to box using only cardboard.
|-
!Box 2
|-
|Beacons||Beacons are devices designed to draw attention to themselves, for various reasons. From the generic term "beacon" this could mean anything from electronic GPS locator beacons to miniature replicas of naval lighthouses. Or, alternatively, it could be like what is referenced in the 7th panel of [[921: Delivery Notification]], which is used to summon elves (which happen to be in the same box).
|-
|Elves||Elves are a fictional race (or rather, many, many fictional races) of human-like magical creatures.
|-
|Sand||Sand grains are fine particles of rock. While it's not unheard of for people to need to store sand, it's usually not stored along with your personal belongings on moving day.
|-
!Box 3 - Blood
|-
|Hemoglobin||{{w|Hemoglobin}} is the protein found in red blood cells that carries oxygen around the body. This may be a solution of hemoglobin protein, but one human generally would not need a full box of it{{Citation needed}}.
|-
!Box 4
|-
|Water||As with sand, it's not unheard of for, say, a laboratory to store water samples for testing. But again, these wouldn't be stored along with your personal belongings on moving day. And if this is meant to be drinking water, it would be a waste of effort; it's taken as read that any house you're moving into has its own plumbing. Unless, of course, they insist on drinking bottled water (which some people do).
|-
|Hooves||{{w|Hooves}} are possibly best-known as horse and cow 'feet'. This could also be read as a compound word, Water-Hooves akin to water-wings.
|-
!Box 5 - Charadriiformes
|-
|Charadriiformes||{{w|Charadriiformes}} are a type of bird that contains (mostly) waterfowl. There are about 350 different species.
|-
|Shorebirds|| Also known as {{w|Wader|Waders}},these are an order of birds that wade in littoral waters.
|-
!Box 6 - Vector ?
|-
|Oil|| This could mean anything from cooking oil to petroleum; either way, having a third of a box full of oil bottles is unusual, but for different reasons. Of course, perhaps it is an entire box.
|-
|Vectors||{{w|Vector}}s are properties with magnitude and direction, such as velocity, momentum, acceleration, etc., but can depend on the context. In any situation, they are not physical objects, so they cannot be put in boxes. Alternatively "vector" could mean a carrier of a disease, such as ticks or mosquitos, but while more possible to box they would still not be practical to keep with common household goods and the intent of moving them as such would be dubious at best.
|-
|Silt|| Material between sand and clay size-wise. A sediment. See sand and water above for why this is unusual. Randall has a special place in his heart for rock particles of various sizes; see [https://what-if.xkcd.com/83/ What If #83].
|-
!Box 7
|-
|Membranes||Delicate thin pliable sheet or skin of various kinds. Usually fragile or cut easily. Not something you would expect to be packed with something sharp, which shards are likely to be, although these labels are incorrect.
|-
|Shards||These are broken pieces of smooth and hard objects, e.g. ceramic, glass, crystal. Something you would normally expect to be thrown out, rather than packed up for moving house.
|-
!Box 8
|-
|Shawls||{{w|Shawls}} are a simple item of clothing, worn loosely over one's shoulders. Also being of rectangular shape, they are supposed to be worn in colder weather.
|-
|Glucose||{{w|Glucose}} is possibly best-known as the sugar plants produce for energy, but can be manufactured.
|-
|Kits||A {{w|kit}} is any set of tools, supplies, and/or instructions for a specific purpose. These could be first aid kits, software development kits, bomb-making kits, sewing kits... It can also refer to juveniles of some mammals, such as foxes or rabbits (it is not very likely that such animals would be packed in a box - though compare [[325: A-Minus-Minus]]). Alternatively, this may be a compound word "Glucose Kits", diabetic assay tools to help the patient regulate their blood sugar.
|-
!Box 9
|-
|Hydrants||{{w|Fire hydrant}}s are likely too big to fit in boxes, and are also simply odd objects to be packing into a box.
|-
|Particles||As almost all matter is composed of {{w|particles}}, it is hard to find exceptions. Thus, this is very vague.
|-
|Knots||{{w|Knot}}s are things tied in ropes; they can hold things or just be there. This would be hard to put in a box without rope{{Citation needed}}. Could also refer to knots in a piece of {{w|wood}}, which are hard to put in the box without the rest of the wood. Knots could also refer to the {{w|Knot_(unit)|unit of speed}}, usually used in meteorology, and in maritime and air navigation which would be impossible to box as it is not a physical object.
|-
!Box 10 - Palette
|-
|Graphite||{{w|Graphite}} is a crystalline form of carbon, where the atoms are arranged in sheets. It is found in some household products (pencils and lubricant oil), though in either case the name of the end product would be a more likely box label. Graphite is also a color.
|-
|Taupe|| {{w|Taupe}} is a dark tan color in between brown and gray, again, not an object. May be a reference to Gliese 581f (a.k.a. Taupe Mars) from [[1253|xkcd #1253]].
|-
!Box 11 - Gaussian surface?
|-
|Field Lines||This could refer to {{w|field line}}s as used to depict electromagnetic fields, or possibly to the lines painted on an athletic field to mark the boundaries of play. The former are a visualization tool rather than physical objects; the latter consist of streaks of paint on grass or artificial turf, and thus neither kind of field line is the kind of physical object that could be packed into a box.
|-
!Box 12
|-
|Traps||May be a reference to 'My house is full of traps' from [https://what-if.xkcd.com/34// What-If #34]
|-
!Box 13
|-
|Edges||{{w|Edge_(geometry)|Edge}} is a line segment joining two vertices. Even though physical objects do have edges, you cannot store edges themselves as they are just mathematical constructs.
|-
|Tribes||{{w|Tribe}} is a social group of people, tribes existed before states were formed. It is impossible to store a group of people in the box{{Citation needed}}.
|-
|Dough||{{w|Dough}} is a thick, malleable, sometimes elastic, paste made out of any grains, leguminous or chestnut crops. It is used in the process of cooking, but it doesn't make sense to pack it while moving.
|-
!Box 14
|-
|Dark Matter||{{w|Dark matter}} is what believe to be a big part of the mass of galaxies, but we have never observed it, so it is not possible to pack it {{Citation needed}}. Alternatively, if all dark matter was permanently packed in boxes like this it would explain why it has never been observed. According to the Copenhagen interpretation of the uncertainty principle, dark matter may both the in the box and somewhere else in the universe until such a time that somebody open the box.
|-
!Box 15
|-
|Manifolds||In topology, {{w|Manifold|Manifolds}} are s with certain "nice" properties (i.e. they are locally Euclidean). This is yet another mathematical construct which is impossible to pack into a box. Manifold could also refer to a pipe or chamber branching into several openings, for example an engine exhaust manifold. While physical, it's unlikely that multiple are put in a box for moving.
|-
!Box 16
|-
|Triangles||Within the context of this comic, the reference is likely to the shape. On the other hand, it would not be unusual to pack one or more {{w|Triangle (musical instrument)}}s into a box.
|-
|Peat|| {{w|Peat}} is an accumulation of partially decayed vegetation that forms in wetland bogs, moors, mires, and swamps.
|-
|Crowns|| These may be royal crowns, or may be the coin worth five shillings in UK pre-decimal currency.
|-
!Box 17
|-
|Scrolls||A {{w|scroll}} is a roll of papyrus, paper, or parchment that contains writing. It is a common item in fantasy games (as elves and traps).
|}

==Transcript==
:[A bunch of cardboard boxes stacked up, each labeled]
:{| class="wikitable"
| style="visibility:hidden" |
| colspan="2" height="80px" width="80px" |
Grids 
Bison 
Checkerboards 
Fog
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px"|
Beacons 
Elves 
Sand
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Hemoglobin
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Water 
Hooves
| style="visibility:hidden" |
|-|
| style="visibility:hidden" |
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Shorebirds
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Oil 
Vectors 
Silt
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Membranes 
Shards
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Shawls 
Glucose 
Kits
| style="visibility:hidden" |
|-|
| style="visibility:hidden" |
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Hydrants 
Particles 
Knots
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Graphite 
Taupe
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Field Lines
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Traps
| style="visibility:hidden" |
|-|
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Edges 
Tribes 
Dough
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Dark Matter
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Manifolds
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Triangles 
Peat 
Crowns
| colspan="2" width="80px" height="80px" |
Scrolls
|}

:[Caption: I always forget to label my moving boxes until they're sealed up and I've forgotten what's in them.]
{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]

Talk:1738: Moon Shapes

2016-09-27T22:24:18Z

WingedCat:

The comic has been updated on xkcd. Randall revised the description of #4. Maybe this should be updated? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.242.135|108.162.242.135]] 21:55, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

It's a reflection of the nuclear war on [[1626|the sun's surface]]. [[User:Mikemk|Mikemk]] ([[User talk:Mikemk|talk]]) 08:08, 26 September 2016 (UTC)

I can't find any photoshopped Moon that looks like the last image. Somebody has to make one. --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.92.207|162.158.92.207]] 13:22, 26 September 2016 (UTC)

: Randall uncharacteristically missed an opportunity for pointing out additional errors that people make: It's interesting to note that you can get a decent estimate of the artist's latitude by looking at how they draw a crescent moon. In equatorial cultures, the crescent looks like a cup or a boat - and they interpret it like that. But if you look at most english language children's books, the crescent looks like a letter 'C' or a 'D' with a human face - suggesting that they were probably made in the tradition of northern Europe. When I first moved from the UK (more or less a 'C'-shaped crescent moon) to the southern USA (more like Randall's depiction of the correctly-drawn crescent with the points at a roughly 45 degree angle to the horizon) - I subconsciously felt that the moon "looked wrong" - it was only much later that I understood the reason.

: Furthermore, this rotation of the moon relative to the observer also explains why "The man in the moon" is a common trope caused by the pareidolia interpretation of the cratering patterns of the moon in northern cultures. But in southern cultures, people tend to see a rabbit in those full-moon patterns - and that has become the source of many of their stories.

: Now that I'm more acutely aware of this - it's interesting to note how many movies get the orientation of the moon wrong for the location that their story is supposedly set in! [[User:SteveBaker|SteveBaker]] ([[User talk:SteveBaker|talk]]) 13:41, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
::In Japan, for example, the patterns are interpreted as a rabbit making mochi (a sort of dense dumpling made from rice pounded into a powder) on the moon - the Sea of Tranquillity forming the head, and the Sea of Clouds forming part of the pestle in which the rabbit is pounding the rice. {{unsigned ip|188.114.102.167}}

::Considering how many movies features the famous [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheMountainsOfIllinois Mountains of Illinois], I would be more surprised when they get it right. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 13:38, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

: Not quite sure how to add this but Gibbon is the author of The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire - or a type of Ape. It is not a phase of the moon. Also I think the moon depicted is Waning. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.113|141.101.98.113]] 14:02, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
::I think the correct expression is gibbous - "having the illuminated part greater than a semicircle and less than a circle" {{unsigned ip|141.101.98.68}}
:: Yes, the one he says is correct has me thinking: "OMG, the moon is drunk and has fallen over on its ass." No self-respecting moon lies on its back like that.[[Special:Contributions/162.158.114.222|162.158.114.222]] 14:17, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
::: Indeed - but that's pretty much how it looks down here in sunny Texas. It's one of those things you never think about - but once the fact of it clicks in your head, you get this visceral feeling of how you're standing on a large ball rather than a flat plane! Ha! Take that flat-earthers! :-) [[User:SteveBaker|SteveBaker]] ([[User talk:SteveBaker|talk]]) 18:46, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
: "Wax gibbon" is probably nothing more than a joke on mispronouncing "waxing gibbous". As drawn, it is the way a waning gibbous would appear in the northern hemisphere, but a waxing gibbous in the southern hemisphere. [[User:Harperska|Harperska]] ([[User talk:Harperska|talk]]) 16:18, 26 September 2016 (UTC)

Link to the DreamWorks logo image please? There seem to be multiple versions. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.237.216|108.162.237.216]] 15:16, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
:I'm surprised Randall missed the chance to include a joke about guys with fishing rods. --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.85.141|162.158.85.141]] 15:41, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
::http://www.roadtovr.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/dreamworks-logo.jpg... Here's the link to the Dreamworks logo. You're welcome. --[[User:JayRulesXKCD|JayRulesXKCD]] ([[User talk:JayRulesXKCD|talk]]) 16:17, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
::neither of the examples for the "stars in the moon" apply here. both randall's examples imply a spherical moon. spring and the dreamworks child are supported on a crescent moon for which only the light section actually exists. better examples, please. --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.84|141.101.98.84]] 12:26, 27 September 2016 (UTC)
::While the dreamworks logo features a child sitting on the crescent moon as though the dark portion wasn't there, none of the versions of the logo which contain stars in the sky actually show stars 'inside' the moon's disk, so the logo probably isn't a good example of what Randall is complaining about. See https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPpy8mYHQps. [[User:Harperska|Harperska]] ([[User talk:Harperska|talk]]) 17:16, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

The first "wrong" image is also only possible if the bright portion is presumed to be the sun during a solar eclipse, assuming the sky is actually depicted as black. You can only have a crescent moon during a solar eclipse if the solar system suddenly acquired a second sun. [[User:Harperska|Harperska]] ([[User talk:Harperska|talk]]) 16:28, 26 September 2016 (UTC)

Here's a good counter-example: [http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-V-N1Fj2RU7Y/Vnvbs3e6JxI/AAAAAAAAouE/X37EuZ2dXmI/s1600/236D5361-D23A-45AD-8D3B-451926D0CA82.jpg EXAMPLE]. The bright dot is actually the ISS transiting the moon - but it certainly looks like an impossibility! [[User:SteveBaker|SteveBaker]] ([[User talk:SteveBaker|talk]]) 18:50, 26 September 2016 (UTC)

The article doesn't mention the "nuclear war" joke. Does it need explaining? [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.49|141.101.98.49]] 19:29, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
:It does now. [[User:WingedCat|WingedCat]] ([[User talk:WingedCat|talk]]) 22:24, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

I've always wanted to create a story, and have the horns of the moon connect on the other side, so you have a blackbody in front of the moon, in parody of this tendency.
Also, interesting how the moon is at different rotations in different locations. I never did see the rabbit in the moon. Now I know why. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.74|108.162.245.74]] 04:34, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

Some of the examples of "incorrect" moons are kinda questionable - like, how relevant is the position of the moon when there's literally a giant divine skyperson standing on it, grabbing stars and scattering of them? [[Special:Contributions/172.68.35.80|172.68.35.80]] 23:09, 26 September 2016 (UTC)

I fixed part of the explanation by mentioning the title text. --[[User:JayRulesXKCD|JayRulesXKCD]] ([[User talk:JayRulesXKCD|talk]]) 14:41, 26 September 2016 (UTC)
:I think that's enough detail for an explanation, so I removed the "incomplete" bar. --[[User:JayRulesXKCD|JayRulesXKCD]] ([[User talk:JayRulesXKCD|talk]]) 14:52, 27 September 2016 (UTC)

1738: Moon Shapes

2016-09-27T22:23:32Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1738
| date = September 26, 2016
| title = Moon Shapes
| image = moon_shapes.png
| titletext = Whenever I see a picture of the moon where the points go more than halfway around, I assume it's being eclipsed by one of those Independence Day ships and interpret the rest of the image in light of that.
}}

==Explanation==
The Earth's {{w|moon}}, being the most prominent object in the night sky, is a frequent subject of art; particularly art depicting a nighttime scene. Unfortunately, the moon often appears in works of art in ways that are very dramatic and would not be realistically possible. It may be done out of ignorance, or knowingly by taking {{w|artistic license}}. As someone interested in and who has worked in astronomy, this likely bothers [[Randall]].

The Earth's {{w|moon}} is well known to have "{{w|lunar phase|phases}}" describing what portion of the visible surface of the moon is illuminated by sunlight and highly visible, and what portion is dark, and generally only slightly visible when the moon appears while the sun is also up. These phases progress between "new" (when the surface facing the Earth is completely dark) and "full" (when the surface facing the Earth is completely illuminated, appearing circular from Earth). Mid-way between those extreme phases is a "half" moon, when exactly half of the surface facing the Earth is completely dark, resulting in a semi-circular appearance.

Because the moon is approximately spherical, as the moon progresses from "new" to "half" (or vice versa), the illuminated portion forms a crescent. As it progresses from "half" to "full" (or vice versa), the illuminated portion it is described as "gibbous" (which just means that the dark portion has formed a crescent). One can imagine this like a globe on which you draw a straight line from the north pole to the south pole down the centre of the side facing you (appearing to create two semi-circles); upon rotating the globe, the line would become rounded as it moved away creating a crescent on the side the line was moved towards. Because of the geometry involved, a line connecting the two points (horns) of a crescent moon (or of the darkened crescent inverse of a gibbous moon) must be a diameter of the moon (i.e. it must pass through the centre of the circle).

The deliberate misidentification of a "waxing gibbous" moon ("waxing" means going from new to full; that is increasing in illuminated area) as a "wax gibbon" (a Southeast Asian ape made of a nonpolar solid) is a source of humour in this comic. This is probably a reference to H.P. Lovecraft, who had several of his stories take place under "a gibbous moon" for dramatic effect.

Further, because the light portion of the moon is illuminated by sunlight (whether or not the moon is in the sky at the same time as the sun), the light side of the moon will always be facing towards the sun. If the moon is in the night sky, the sun must be somewhere "below" the horizon on the other side of the Earth. Thus, at night, the light portion of the moon must always be the on the half of the moon that faces the horizon (there are points during the daytime when the orientation can go the other way).

It is also notable that the portion of the moon that is dark is still a large hunk of (unlit) rock, and therefore even at night when we can't distinguish between the dark part of the moon and the background blackness, it would still be impossible to see more distant objects such as stars "through" the dark portion of the moon's circumference. This is most dramatically exemplified by a {{w|solar eclipse}} during which the moon passes in front of the sun and is therefore completely dark (the sun is lighting only the far side), but the moon's circumference still blocks a circular portion of the sun's light. Therefore, if we were to see any lights in the part of the sky the dark side of the moon blocks, they would need to be from sources between us and the moon's surface, such as a nuclear war on the moon.

This comic lists some of the some common mistakes. In some cases, a depiction may be unrealistic in multiple ways - for example, the {{w|Flag of Tunisia}} has both unrealistic horns and a star visible between the horns, while {{w|File:Moon tarot charles6.jpg|the Charles VI tarot}} shows a moon with over-long horns pointing towards the horizon.

In the title text, Randall is referring to the movie "{{w|Independence Day (film)|Independence Day}}" and how one of the alien's ships (in the movie) 'eclipses' part of the moon. He says that if the points go halfway or longer around the moon, then he imagines it's caused by an alien ship and interprets the entire piece of art in that context (i.e. aliens are about to attack those shepherds!).

{| class="wikitable"
|+Explanation of individual items in the list
!Image
!Shape
!Explanation
!Examples
|-
|[[File:moon1.jpg]]|| Full moon || Normal || Reality
|-
|[[File:moon2.jpg]]|| Gibbous moon || Normal || Reality
|-
|[[File:moon4a.jpg]]|| Crescent moon with horns away from horizon || Normal || Reality
|-
|[[File:moon3.jpg]]|| Crescent moon with horns towards horizon || This can only happen when the sun is above the horizon. Since a crescent moon means that the Sun and the Moon are relatively close in the sky, the Moon would not be visible with a naked eye, its light completely outshone by the sunlight. Randall comments it is possible only during a solar eclipse. Technically he is right, as the Moon could be observed in such configuration during a solar eclipse, which creates temporary darkness within a (moving) area on Earth, allowing to see the faint light of the crescent Moon - but that would mean that something else than the Moon is eclipsing the Sun, maybe a huge planetoid passing by the Earth or a giant alien spaceship mentioned in the title text. If it is an ordinary eclipse, then the crescent in the picture is actually partially eclipsed Sun, and the dark area is the Moon. || Van Gogh, {{w|File:Van Gogh - Passeio ao Crepúsculo.jpg|Landscape with Couple Walking and Crescent Moon}}
|-
|[[File:moon5a.jpg]]|| Wide crescent-like moon where the horns don't connect through a diameter || This is only possible during a partial solar eclipse or the start of an annular eclipse (in which cases the lit portion is not the moon, but the sun), or else if the Earth is casting its partial shadow on the Moon, a penumbral lunar eclipse. Randall labels the lunar eclipse "dubious", since the shadow during penumbral eclipse would be much ligther than shown here, in fact barely visible as a slight darkening of the Moon's surface. The Earth's shadow, being very large, would also likely cast a less-rounded edge than depicted here. || Van Gogh, {{w|File:Van Gogh - Starry Night - Google Art Project.jpg|Starry Night}}
|-
|[[File:moon6.jpg]]|| Narrow crescent-like moon where the points don't connect through a diameter || This situation is even harder to create than the previous one - unlike the previous example, here the diameter of the entire shadow is clear, and is too small for the Earth's shadow in a lunar eclipse. A huge ''Independence Day'' spaceship (as per the Title text) might be the right size. It does however resemble a partial {{w|annular eclipse}} if you imagine that the black area is the moon covering up the white sun. || {{w|File:AlcoholicBluesCoverVonTilze.jpg|Alcoholic Blues}}
|-
|[[File:moon7.jpg]]|| Crescent moon blocking stars|| Normal || Reality (but see Trivia below)
|-
|[[File:moon8.jpg]]|| Crescent moon with stars between horns || Many people (including artists) seem to forget that the dark portion of the moon is still a solid object that we can not see through.[http://imgur.com/S30fuOj][https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/a7/7d/4a/a77d4ae9e3549e36edd350246d33700c.jpg] If stars are visible, there are either one or more holes in the moon, or the light-source is actually on the moon, such as nuclear explosions. As the {{w|Star and Crescent}}, the image is sometimes considered a symbol of Islam, although it's relatively recent and there's no traditional basis for putting the star ''between'' the horns - as originally used on the Flag of Turkey, the star appears in a realistic position. || Edwin Blashfield, {{w|File:Edwin Blashfield - Spring Scattering Stars.jpg|Spring Scattering Stars}}, the {{w|DreamWorks Animation}} logo
|}

==Trivia==
[[File:moon7a.jpg]] The image of the crescent moon blocking the stars is slightly wrong, because there are still lights on the surface of the moon.

==Transcript==
:[Caption above the panel:]
:'''Interpreting the shape of the moon in art'''
:[The left part of the panel shows a two column chart is shown with labels above the columns. The left side shows the moons shape as white on a black square. These types of moons could be seen in certain art pieces. The right side saying whether this is normal or not as indicated with a green check mark or a red X. Right of the second column there are explanations of why the specific type of moon is marked as it is and what it could be called or how it could be possible even with the red X. The upper three moons have one common explanation as indicated with a bracket that covers all three with the text on the middle part of the bracket. Similarly moon five and six also have a bracket and only one explanation.]
:Shape Normal?

:[Shape #1-3 shows a white circle (full moon), a more than half full moon (Gibbon) and a thin seal at the bottom right of the square.]
:<big>✓</big>
:<big>✓</big> "Full" or "Quarter" or "Harvest" or "Wax Gibbon" or whatever
:<big>✓</big>

:[Shape #4 same as #3 but with the seal in the upper part of the square.]
:<big>✗</big> Only possible during a solar eclipse

:[Shape #5-6 shows a full moon with a circular section taken out of the right side and a seal that goes almost all the way around the circumference of the moon with almost a full circle taken out of the top left part of the moon.]
:<big>✗</big>
:<big>✗</big> Only possible during a lunar eclipse (#1 only, dubious) or a solar eclipse (bright part is the Sun)

:[Shape #7 same as #3 but with the seal a little smaller and more to the top and less to the left. Around the moon there are several starts represented with 29 small white dots. In the center of the black square there is a black circle, coinciding with the outer rim of the seal. Within this circle (the dark side of the moon) there are no stars!]
:<big>✓</big> Looks OK

:[Shape #8 same as #7 but apart from the 29 small white dots from before there are now also 6 more dots inside the dark circle with no stars in #7.]
:<big>✗</big> There's either a hole in the Moon or a nuclear war on its surface.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Fiction]] 
[[Category:Astronomy]]

1738: Moon Shapes

2016-09-27T22:11:40Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1738
| date = September 26, 2016
| title = Moon Shapes
| image = moon_shapes.png
| titletext = Whenever I see a picture of the moon where the points go more than halfway around, I assume it's being eclipsed by one of those Independence Day ships and interpret the rest of the image in light of that.
}}

==Explanation==
The Earth's {{w|moon}}, being the most prominent object in the night sky, is a frequent subject of art; particularly art depicting a nighttime scene. Unfortunately, the moon often appears in works of art in ways that are very dramatic and would not be realistically possible. It may be done out of ignorance, or knowingly by taking {{w|artistic license}}. As someone interested in and who has worked in astronomy, this likely bothers [[Randall]].

The Earth's {{w|moon}} is well known to have "{{w|lunar phase|phases}}" describing what portion of the visible surface of the moon is illuminated by sunlight and highly visible, and what portion is dark, and generally only slightly visible when the moon appears while the sun is also up. These phases progress between "new" (when the surface facing the Earth is completely dark) and "full" (when the surface facing the Earth is completely illuminated, appearing circular from Earth). Mid-way between those extreme phases is a "half" moon, when exactly half of the surface facing the Earth is completely dark, resulting in a semi-circular appearance.

Because the moon is approximately spherical, as the moon progresses from "new" to "half" (or vice versa), the illuminated portion forms a crescent. As it progresses from "half" to "full" (or vice versa), the illuminated portion it is described as "gibbous" (which just means that the dark portion has formed a crescent). One can imagine this like a globe on which you draw a straight line from the north pole to the south pole down the centre of the side facing you (appearing to create two semi-circles); upon rotating the globe, the line would become rounded as it moved away creating a crescent on the side the line was moved towards. Because of the geometry involved, a line connecting the two points (horns) of a crescent moon (or of the darkened crescent inverse of a gibbous moon) must be a diameter of the moon (i.e. it must pass through the centre of the circle).

The deliberate misidentification of a "waxing gibbous" moon ("waxing" means going from new to full; that is increasing in illuminated area) as a "wax gibbon" (a Southeast Asian ape made of a nonpolar solid) is a source of humour in this comic. This is probably a reference to H.P. Lovecraft, who had several of his stories take place under "a gibbous moon" for dramatic effect.

Further, because the light portion of the moon is illuminated by sunlight (whether or not the moon is in the sky at the same time as the sun), the light side of the moon will always be facing towards the sun. If the moon is in the night sky, the sun must be somewhere "below" the horizon on the other side of the Earth. Thus, at night, the light portion of the moon must always be the on the half of the moon that faces the horizon (there are points during the daytime when the orientation can go the other way).

It is also notable that the portion of the moon that is dark is still a large hunk of (unlit) rock, and therefore even at night when we can't distinguish between the dark part of the moon and the background blackness, it would still be impossible to see more distant objects such as stars "through" the dark portion of the moon's circumference. This is most dramatically exemplified by a {{w|solar eclipse}} during which the moon passes in front of the sun and is therefore completely dark (the sun is lighting only the far side), but the moon's circumference still blocks a circular portion of the sun's light.

This comic lists some of the some common mistakes. In some cases, a depiction may be unrealistic in multiple ways - for example, the {{w|Flag of Tunisia}} has both unrealistic horns and a star visible between the horns, while {{w|File:Moon tarot charles6.jpg|the Charles VI tarot}} shows a moon with over-long horns pointing towards the horizon.

In the title text, Randall is referring to the movie "{{w|Independence Day (film)|Independence Day}}" and how one of the alien's ships (in the movie) 'eclipses' part of the moon. He says that if the points go halfway or longer around the moon, then he imagines it's caused by an alien ship and interprets the entire piece of art in that context (i.e. aliens are about to attack those shepherds!).

{| class="wikitable"
|+Explanation of individual items in the list
!Image
!Shape
!Explanation
!Examples
|-
|[[File:moon1.jpg]]|| Full moon || Normal || Reality
|-
|[[File:moon2.jpg]]|| Gibbous moon || Normal || Reality
|-
|[[File:moon4a.jpg]]|| Crescent moon with horns away from horizon || Normal || Reality
|-
|[[File:moon3.jpg]]|| Crescent moon with horns towards horizon || This can only happen when the sun is above the horizon. Since a crescent moon means that the Sun and the Moon are relatively close in the sky, the Moon would not be visible with a naked eye, its light completely outshone by the sunlight. Randall comments it is possible only during a solar eclipse. Technically he is right, as the Moon could be observed in such configuration during a solar eclipse, which creates temporary darkness within a (moving) area on Earth, allowing to see the faint light of the crescent Moon - but that would mean that something else than the Moon is eclipsing the Sun, maybe a huge planetoid passing by the Earth or a giant alien spaceship mentioned in the title text. If it is an ordinary eclipse, then the crescent in the picture is actually partially eclipsed Sun, and the dark area is the Moon. || Van Gogh, {{w|File:Van Gogh - Passeio ao Crepúsculo.jpg|Landscape with Couple Walking and Crescent Moon}}
|-
|[[File:moon5a.jpg]]|| Wide crescent-like moon where the horns don't connect through a diameter || This is only possible during a partial solar eclipse or the start of an annular eclipse (in which cases the lit portion is not the moon, but the sun), or else if the Earth is casting its partial shadow on the Moon, a penumbral lunar eclipse. Randall labels the lunar eclipse "dubious", since the shadow during penumbral eclipse would be much ligther than shown here, in fact barely visible as a slight darkening of the Moon's surface. The Earth's shadow, being very large, would also likely cast a less-rounded edge than depicted here. || Van Gogh, {{w|File:Van Gogh - Starry Night - Google Art Project.jpg|Starry Night}}
|-
|[[File:moon6.jpg]]|| Narrow crescent-like moon where the points don't connect through a diameter || This situation is even harder to create than the previous one - unlike the previous example, here the diameter of the entire shadow is clear, and is too small for the Earth's shadow in a lunar eclipse. A huge ''Independence Day'' spaceship (as per the Title text) might be the right size. It does however resemble a partial {{w|annular eclipse}} if you imagine that the black area is the moon covering up the white sun. || {{w|File:AlcoholicBluesCoverVonTilze.jpg|Alcoholic Blues}}
|-
|[[File:moon7.jpg]]|| Crescent moon blocking stars|| Normal || Reality (but see Trivia below)
|-
|[[File:moon8.jpg]]|| Crescent moon with stars between horns || Many people (including artists) seem to forget that the dark portion of the moon is still a solid object that we can not see through.[http://imgur.com/S30fuOj][https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/a7/7d/4a/a77d4ae9e3549e36edd350246d33700c.jpg] If stars are visible, there are either one or more holes in the moon, or the light-source is actually on the moon, such as nuclear explosions. As the {{w|Star and Crescent}}, the image is sometimes considered a symbol of Islam, although it's relatively recent and there's no traditional basis for putting the star ''between'' the horns - as originally used on the Flag of Turkey, the star appears in a realistic position. || Edwin Blashfield, {{w|File:Edwin Blashfield - Spring Scattering Stars.jpg|Spring Scattering Stars}}, the {{w|DreamWorks Animation}} logo
|}

==Trivia==
[[File:moon7a.jpg]] The image of the crescent moon blocking the stars is slightly wrong, because there are still lights on the surface of the moon.

==Transcript==
:[Caption above the panel:]
:'''Interpreting the shape of the moon in art'''
:[The left part of the panel shows a two column chart is shown with labels above the columns. The left side shows the moons shape as white on a black square. These types of moons could be seen in certain art pieces. The right side saying whether this is normal or not as indicated with a green check mark or a red X. Right of the second column there are explanations of why the specific type of moon is marked as it is and what it could be called or how it could be possible even with the red X. The upper three moons have one common explanation as indicated with a bracket that covers all three with the text on the middle part of the bracket. Similarly moon five and six also have a bracket and only one explanation.]
:Shape Normal?

:[Shape #1-3 shows a white circle (full moon), a more than half full moon (Gibbon) and a thin seal at the bottom right of the square.]
:<big>✓</big>
:<big>✓</big> "Full" or "Quarter" or "Harvest" or "Wax Gibbon" or whatever
:<big>✓</big>

:[Shape #4 same as #3 but with the seal in the upper part of the square.]
:<big>✗</big> Only possible during a solar eclipse

:[Shape #5-6 shows a full moon with a circular section taken out of the right side and a seal that goes almost all the way around the circumference of the moon with almost a full circle taken out of the top left part of the moon.]
:<big>✗</big>
:<big>✗</big> Only possible during a lunar eclipse (#1 only, dubious) or a solar eclipse (bright part is the Sun)

:[Shape #7 same as #3 but with the seal a little smaller and more to the top and less to the left. Around the moon there are several starts represented with 29 small white dots. In the center of the black square there is a black circle, coinciding with the outer rim of the seal. Within this circle (the dark side of the moon) there are no stars!]
:<big>✓</big> Looks OK

:[Shape #8 same as #7 but apart from the 29 small white dots from before there are now also 6 more dots inside the dark circle with no stars in #7.]
:<big>✗</big> There's either a hole in the Moon or a nuclear war on its surface.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Fiction]] 
[[Category:Astronomy]]

1737: Datacenter Scale

2016-09-27T22:06:24Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1737
| date = September 23, 2016
| title = Datacenter Scale
| image = datacenter_scale.png
| titletext = Asimov's Cosmic AC was created by linking all datacenters through hyperspace, which explains a lot. It didn't reverse entropy--it just discarded the universe when it reached end-of-life and ordered a new one.
}}
==Explanation==

This comic expands, to the limit, the strategy that it's a net cost saving to allow cheap hardware to fail and simply replace it than to have robust but much more expensive systems to start with. The technique was made famous by [https://books.google.com/books?id=zdlZ2rrcZWEC&pg=PA19&lpg=PA19#v=onepage&q&f=false Google circa 1999,] when its successful cost-effective server designs were actually using sub-consumer, nearly junk, hardware.

{{w|RAID}} ("redundant array of independent disks") is a technology that splits data across several hard drives as if they were one. RAID comes in several levels (varieties) which have different applications, but one of the big applications of RAID is creating mirrored hard disks that back each other up. If one disk drive in such a RAID fails, no data is lost.

However, RAID is complicated to configure, so you don't want to be constantly setting it up. An alternative technique for data centers is, therefore, to simply send the data to several servers at once. This makes maintenance easier, but without RAID, one hard disk crash basically breaks the server. However, this is what the woman with a bun's (possibly an adult [[Science Girl]]) data center is doing since their scale is so large that fixing individual servers does not make sense, and instead of fixing the drive they throw away the machine.

From here, the comic starts to exaggerate. Nowadays, servers can be made extremely small ("{{w|Blade server}}s") and dozens of servers can be attached to one {{w|19-inch rack}} in a data center. Rather than going to the effort of unplugging and unscrewing one blade from the rack, when a blade fails at [[Cueball]]'s data center they just throw away the rack, and [[Ponytail]] agrees and mildly mocks the woman with a bun for replacing one server.

[[Hairy]]'s data center goes one step further - they have so many servers that they would constantly have to be throwing away and replacing racks, so instead they just build a new room when one rack fails. This would be currently possible with small modular data centers that are built in shipping containers for easy transport and can be linked together to expand capacity. Here the cargo-container "room" with the failure would be quickly swapped with a fresh one. Cueball adds "like Google!" - [[Randall]] previously mentioned {{w|Google|Google's}} approach to hard drive failures in the [[what if?]] ''{{what if|63|Google's Datacenters on Punch Cards}}''. Back in [http://static.googleusercontent.com/media/research.google.com/de//archive/disk_failures.pdf 2007] they had one failure every few minutes, which might have increased hugely since then.

Finally [[Megan]] appears and her company, of course, breaks the scale of silliness in exaggeration. She says that they don't have any fire extinguishers (neither {{w|Fire sprinkler system|regular sprinklers}} nor the systems that deploy gasses like FM-200 which alter the room air's ability to sustain a fire). Rather, they just rope the center off, thus letting the data center burn down. Then they simply move a town over and build a new one. This may indicate they are so big that the entire town will burn down if their center catches fire, for else they did not have to skip town. Alternatively, they just leave the center burning and this may cause problems in that town, so they simply flee the premises.

Most big internet companies do have multiple redundant data centers around the world, in order to increase speeds for users in different countries, but Megan's idea would be very expensive, result in increased {{w|Latency (engineering)|latency}}, possibly kill people (either in their company, or other people in the town and since they do not try to put out the fire), and cause severe destruction of properties in addition to their own. These last two items would result in additional litigation and fines, and potentially jail sentences for the people charged with implementing the policy. They may also result in other towns being unwilling to take their business, out of fear they will wind up burning too.

Hairy still thinks that it makes sense, while Cueball wonders what difference the roping off does. This could again be a reference to the fact that they just let the buildings burn without bothering about the local consequences, and the next step is just one more step towards the extreme of the title text.

This comic references how, as data requirements expand, the cost of time eventually outweighs the cost of hardware at ever increasing scales (drive, rack, room, building). While this comic takes this to the extreme, with whole buildings being destroyed for simple flaws, the concept is not as far-fetched as it seems if "thrown out" is taken to include being sold to equipment refurbishers. It could indeed be cost effective for a large data services provider to resell racks or even whole data center modules at some significant fraction of their "as new" price as opposed expending the time and effort to attempt a repair. The equipment refurbisher would then rely on a {{w|competitive advantage|cost advantage}} like cheaper labor to repair the flaw and sell it back to Google or another company with less demanding requirements. Equipment rental firms already operate on this model and with the added incentive customers preferring to rent newer models, this means that the equipment is often ''preemptively'' replaced before failures even occur.

The title text refers to {{w|Isaac Asimov}}'s science-fiction short story "{{w|The Last Question}}", where humanity asks, at different stages of its spatial and technological development, the same question to increasingly advanced computers: "How can the net amount of {{w|entropy}} of the universe be massively decreased?". At each point, the computer's answer is that it does not yet have sufficient data for a meaningful answer. Ultimately, the computers are all linked through hyperspace, outside the physical boundaries of the universe, and make up a single computing entity named AC which keeps pondering the question even as the {{w|heat death of the universe}} occurs and time and space cease to exist. When AC finally discovers the answer, since there is nobody left to report it to, it decides to demonstrate it and says "{{w|Let there be light|LET THERE BE LIGHT!}}", which are the first words said by God during the Creation, according to the {{w|Book of Genesis}}. Here, the title text implies that, as the universe died, AC no longer had a use for it as a physical support and, taking the comic's logic to the next extreme, chose to discard it and get a brand-new one instead of bothering to "fix" it by reversing its entropy. This short story was also referenced in [[1448: Question]].

This comic's concept of taking a real world phenomenon and exaggerating it to levels currently considered implausible for comic effect closely mimics an earlier comic which describes progressively more "hardcore" programmers in [[378: Real Programmers]]. This comic might be related to [[1567: Kitchen Tips]] which suggests not throwing away your dishes but washing them.

==Transcript==
:[Zoom in on a woman with a bun holding her hand palm up in front of her taking to people off-panel right.]
:Woman with a bun: RAID controllers don't make sense at our scale; everything is redundant at higher levels. When a drive fails, we just throw away the whole machine.

:[In this frame-less panel it is revealed that the woman with a bun talked to Cueball and Ponytail who is looking her way.]
:Cueball: Machine? We throw away whole racks at a time.
:Ponytail: Yeah, who replaces ''one server''?

:[Hairy has appeared from the left and holds one hand palm up towards the other three where also the woman with a bun has turned towards him.]
:Hairy: We just replace whole rooms at once. At our scale, messing with racks isn't economical.
:Woman with a bun: Wow.
:Cueball: Like Google!

:[Megan walks in from the left, and everyone including Hairy now looks towards her. Cueball has taken a hand up to his chin. The replies to Megan are written with clearly smaller font.]
:Megan: We don't have sprinklers or inert gas systems. When a datacenter catches fire, we just rope it off and rebuild one town over.
:Hairy: Makes sense.
:Cueball: I wonder if the rope is really necessary.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Science Girl]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Fiction]]

1737: Datacenter Scale

2016-09-27T21:58:44Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1737
| date = September 23, 2016
| title = Datacenter Scale
| image = datacenter_scale.png
| titletext = Asimov's Cosmic AC was created by linking all datacenters through hyperspace, which explains a lot. It didn't reverse entropy--it just discarded the universe when it reached end-of-life and ordered a new one.
}}
==Explanation==

This comic expands, to the limit, the strategy that it's a net cost saving to allow cheap hardware to fail and simply replace it than to have robust but much more expensive systems to start with. The technique was made famous by [https://books.google.com/books?id=zdlZ2rrcZWEC&pg=PA19&lpg=PA19#v=onepage&q&f=false Google circa 1999,] when its successful cost-effective server designs were actually using sub-consumer, nearly junk, hardware.

{{w|RAID}} ("redundant array of independent disks") is a technology that splits data across several hard drives as if they were one. RAID comes in several levels (varieties) which have different applications, but one of the big applications of RAID is creating mirrored hard disks that back each other up. If one disk drive in such a RAID fails, no data is lost.

However, RAID is complicated to configure, so you don't want to be constantly setting it up. An alternative technique for data centers is, therefore, to simply send the data to several servers at once. This makes maintenance easier, but without RAID, one hard disk crash basically breaks the server. However, this is what the woman with a bun's (possibly an adult [[Science Girl]]) data center is doing since their scale is so large that fixing individual servers does not make sense, and instead of fixing the drive they throw away the machine.

From here, the comic starts to exaggerate. Nowadays, servers can be made extremely small ("{{w|Blade server}}s") and dozens of servers can be attached to one {{w|19-inch rack}} in a data center. Rather than going to the effort of unplugging and unscrewing one blade from the rack, when a blade fails at [[Cueball]]'s data center they just throw away the rack, and [[Ponytail]] agrees and mildly mocks the woman with a bun for replacing one server.

[[Hairy]]'s goes one step further - they have so many servers that they would constantly have to be throwing away and replacing racks, so instead they just build a new room when one rack fails. This would be currently possible with small modular data centers that are built in shipping containers for easy transport and can be linked together to expand capacity. Here the cargo-container "room" with the failure would be quickly swapped with a fresh one. Cueball adds "like Google!" - [[Randall]] previously mentioned {{w|Google|Google's}} approach to hard drive failures in the [[what if?]] ''{{what if|63|Google's Datacenters on Punch Cards}}''. Back in [http://static.googleusercontent.com/media/research.google.com/de//archive/disk_failures.pdf 2007] they had one failure every few minutes - that might have increased hugely since then.

Finally [[Megan]] appears and her company, of course, breaks the scale of silliness in exaggeration. She says that they don't have any fire extinguishers (neither {{w|Fire sprinkler system|regular sprinklers}} nor the systems that deploy gasses like FM-200 which alter the room air's ability to sustain a fire). Rather, they just rope the center off, thus letting the data center burn down. Then they simply move a town over and build a new one. This may indicate they are so big that the entire town will burn down if their center catches fire, for else they did not have to skip town. Alternatively, they just leave the center burning and this may cause problems in that town, so they simply flee the premises.

Most big internet companies do have multiple redundant data centers around the world, in order to increase speeds for users in different countries, but Megan's idea would be very expensive, increase in {{w|Latency (engineering)|latency}} and possibly also kill people, either in their company or other people in the town and since they do not try to turn out the fire, at least cause severe destruction of properties, not only their own.

Still Hairy thinks that it makes sense, whereas Cueball wonders what difference the roping off does. This could again be a reference to the fact that they just let the buildings burn without bothering about the local consequences, and the next step is just one more step towards the extreme of the title text.

This comic references how, as data requirements expand, the cost of time eventually outweighs the cost of hardware at ever increasing scales (drive, rack, room, building). While this comic takes this to the extreme, with whole buildings being destroyed for simple flaws, the concept is not as far-fetched as it seems if "thrown out" is taken to include being sold to equipment refurbishers. It could indeed be cost effective for a large data services provider to resell racks or even whole data center modules at some significant fraction of their "as new" price as opposed expending the time and effort to attempt a repair. The equipment refurbisher would then rely on a {{w|competitive advantage|cost advantage}} like cheaper labor to repair the flaw and sell it back to Google or another company with less demanding requirements. Equipment rental firms already operate on this model and with the added incentive customers preferring to rent newer models, this means that the equipment is often ''preemptively'' replaced before failures even occur.

The title text refers to {{w|Isaac Asimov}}'s science-fiction short story "{{w|The Last Question}}", where humanity asks, at different stages of its spatial and technological development, the same question to increasingly advanced computers: "How can the net amount of {{w|entropy}} of the universe be massively decreased?". At each point, the computer's answer is that it does not yet have sufficient data for a meaningful answer. Ultimately, the computers are all linked through hyperspace, outside the physical boundaries of the universe, and make up a single computing entity named AC which keeps pondering the question even as the {{w|heat death of the universe}} occurs and time and space cease to exist. When AC finally discovers the answer, since there is nobody left to report it to, it decides to demonstrate it and says "{{w|Let there be light|LET THERE BE LIGHT!}}", which are the first words said by God during the Creation, according to the {{w|Book of Genesis}}. Here, the title text implies that, as the universe died, AC no longer had a use for it as a physical support and, taking the comic's logic to the next extreme, chose to discard it and get a brand-new one instead of bothering to "fix" it by reversing its entropy. This short story was also referenced in [[1448: Question]].

This comic's concept of taking a real world phenomenon and exaggerating it to levels currently considered implausible for comic effect closely mimics an earlier comic which describes progressively more "hardcore" programmers in [[378: Real Programmers]]. This comic might be related to [[1567: Kitchen Tips]] which suggests not throwing away your dishes but washing them.

==Transcript==
:[Zoom in on a woman with a bun holding her hand palm up in front of her taking to people off-panel right.]
:Woman with a bun: RAID controllers don't make sense at our scale; everything is redundant at higher levels. When a drive fails, we just throw away the whole machine.

:[In this frame-less panel it is revealed that the woman with a bun talked to Cueball and Ponytail who is looking her way.]
:Cueball: Machine? We throw away whole racks at a time.
:Ponytail: Yeah, who replaces ''one server''?

:[Hairy has appeared from the left and holds one hand palm up towards the other three where also the woman with a bun has turned towards him.]
:Hairy: We just replace whole rooms at once. At our scale, messing with racks isn't economical.
:Woman with a bun: Wow.
:Cueball: Like Google!

:[Megan walks in from the left, and everyone including Hairy now looks towards her. Cueball has taken a hand up to his chin. The replies to Megan are written with clearly smaller font.]
:Megan: We don't have sprinklers or inert gas systems. When a datacenter catches fire, we just rope it off and rebuild one town over.
:Hairy: Makes sense.
:Cueball: I wonder if the rope is really necessary.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Science Girl]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Fiction]]

1735: Fashion Police and Grammar Police

2016-09-20T21:48:09Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */ Removing incomplete tag, as the conditions have been fulfilled

{{comic
| number = 1735
| date = September 19, 2016
| title = Fashion Police and Grammar Police
| image = fashion_police_and_grammar_police.png
| titletext = * Mad about jorts
}}

==Explanation==
In this comic, two groups of angry protesters are presented and labeled. They should not be seen as protesting side by side, but rather like two similar groups protesting about different things even though they are in many ways similar.

The left group represents the '''Fashion Police''' with [[Cueball]] holding a sign saying {{w|Crocs}} not allowed (by showing a pair of Crocs shoes in a circle with a strike through it). Crocs are a type of {{w|Clog|clogs}} made of foam. There may be some ergonomic advantages to these special looking shoes, but they will {{w|Crocs#Fashion|never become fashionable}}. It is not the first time [[Randall]] mocks a special type of shoes (although here it may not so much be himself that are against Crocs, but rather he just chose something easy to recognize that the Fashion Police would hate). Previously in [[1065: Shoes]] Randall was after shoes that ''has those creepy individual toes'' like {{w|Vibram FiveFingers}}. They will also never be a hit with the Fashion Police.

The right group represents the '''Grammar Police''' with another Cueball holding a sign with three commonly confused words beneath each other: [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/their Their] (belongs to them), [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/they%27re They're] (contraction meaning "they are"), [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/there There] (a location). The words are written on the sign to explain that there is a difference between these three almost identically-sounding words as many people confuse them with each other, and then the Grammar Police ''have'' to correct them (see [[386: Duty Calls]]). See the [https://twitter.com/_grammar_ Grammar Police on Twitter] and also {{w|Grammar Police|Linguistic prescription}} which comes up on Wikipedia when searching for Grammar Police.

The two groups look similar, standing in similar poses and apart from one Cueball holding signs in each group, one [[Megan]] is also in the front line of both groups. [[Hairy]] is only shown with the fashion police, together with yet another [[:Category:Multiple Cueballs|Cueball-like guy]], while [[Ponytail]] is only shown with the grammar police together with a bald man with glasses.

Both types of police are groups of people who make fun of others who wear or say something that doesn't meet their criteria of "good". Fashion police are people who make fun of others who wear clothing that is mismatched, out of style/{{w|fashion}} or straight-up "ugly" to them. Grammar police are people who are "sticklers" to {{w|grammar}} rules and get mad or contradictory if someone uses non-standard grammar in a sentence. The comic explains how the two groups are similar to each other by listing eight points (plus a ninth in the title text) that can be used on both groups. See explanation in the [[#Table of individual items|table below]].

In the caption below the comic Randall notes that he just realized that these are literally the same people because they both exhibit the listed traits. The use of "[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/literally literally]" to emphasize a statement is considered by the grammar police as a dread crime that should be pointed out as such, although the dictionaries already include this definition as acceptable. However it would likely be more appropriate to say figuratively the same people, see [[725: Literally]]. On the other hand, fashion police is known for overusing "literally" in the way the grammar police finds disgusting.

Since it seem like a safe assumption (see [[1339: When You Assume]]) that there are more grammar pedants (see title text of [[1652: Conditionals]]) than fashion police people who read xkcd, and it also would seem likely that many xkcd readers would dislike the Fashion Police (more), it seems likely that Randall is actually mainly targeting the Grammar Police people reading xkcd, than the fashion people who do not. They will not like to be compared to the Fashion Police! Ponytail also represented the grammar police in [[1576: I Could Care Less]], where Megan puts her in place after she polices her sentence. Thus this shows what Randall thinks about such police work and supports the assumption above. Literally was also used here in the title text.

Randall is, with regards to language, definitely one of those that can belong in this group: ''To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well.''

The title is a ninth point on the list with the star in front representing one more bullet (see the last entry in the [[#Table of individual items|table below]]):
*Mad about jorts.

==Table of individual items==
{| class="wikitable"
|+Explanation of individual items in the list
!list item
!Explanation
|-
|Judgemental and Smug || Both types of police will look down upon those who violate their 'laws'.
|-
|Angry about something deeply arbitrary || Both grammar and fashion are, essentially, made-up human constructs.
|-
| Strong opinions backed by style guides || Grammar has ''{{w|The Elements of Style}}'', fashion has fashion magazines.
|-
| Appreciate that the way that you are interpreted is your responsibility || Your choices in both grammar and fashion affect how people see you, and it would be silly to disclaim responsibility for what is essentially your own actions.
|-
| Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own || This means that even if you deliberately choose to not listen to the fashion gurus, then you are actually making a fashion statement anyway, as opposed to those that just don't realize they have a horrible style (and are not dressing wrongly on purpose). Both types can thus be harassed by the Fashion Police. Same goes for those who deliberately do not try to follow the grammar rules. They have thus taken a stance anyway as opposed to those who just do not know how to use grammar correctly. And both types can be harassed for it by the Grammar Police.
|-
|To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well || Deliberately violating fashion or grammar rules gives off a particular 'casual' vibe, distinct from those who violate the rules out of ignorance.
|-
|Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class || "Proper" dress and "proper" language are often defined in terms of how high class people dress and speak. But since "high class" in much of the Western world has generally meant white, alternative ways of dress (e.g. the Afro) or alternative ways of speaking (e.g. Ebonics or Pidgin English) are treated as somehow objectively "wrong", rather than simply as alternatives. Furthermore, dressing or speaking poorly are often marks of "lower class" people who for whatever reason cannot afford fashionable clothing, or don't have access to quality education. So when we judge people for their clothing or their speech, we are often indirectly judging them for their race and class. Randall identifies this fact as "uncomfortably transparent".
|-
| Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you|| This may have to do with the human tendency to view the morality of an activity differently when applied to oneself compared to a stranger.
|-
| Mad about jorts (Title text) || "{{w|Shorts#Jorts|Jorts}}" is a {{w|portmanteau}} for a pair of jeans that are made into shorts.

The fashion police would be mad about jorts for being unfashionable.

The grammar police would be mad about the word 'jorts' being an inappropriate portmanteau of jeans and shorts, and also for the fact that the sentence could be misinterpreted as if someone like jorts, as in being mad about something in a positive way.

{{w|Sentence_clause_structure#Incomplete_sentence|Also a fragment}}, with no subject (properly it would be "I am mad about jorts"). Randall has [[:Category:Portmanteau|often used]] portmanteaus as part of his jokes.

It is also possible that the Grammar police are indeed "mad about Jorts" in the positive sense, i.e Grammar Police love Jorts.
|}

==Transcript==
:[Beneath two headings to the left and right are shown two aggressive-looking groups of people with only the four people in the front clearly shown for each group. Behind them five other people can be seen, but they are not drawn with the same solid line and are only partly shown behind the first four, but legs from all five in each group can be seen along with some heads (all Cueball like) and arms etc. The front of the left group consist of Hairy holding a fist up towards left, Megan with her arms crossed in front of her chest, Cueball holding a sign, using both hands, straight up above his head and another Cueball-like guy to the right is holding up a broken branch in one hand toward right. The person behind this last person is shown to hold up his fist towards right like Hairy does to the left. The sign shows a Crocs shoe in a circle with a strike through it going above the Crocs from top left to bottom right. The front of the right group consist of Megan holding both her arms over her head hands folded into fist while looking towards left, Cueball holding a sign, using both hands, towards the right and up above Ponytails head, she is raising one hand in a fist to the left and finally a bald guy with glasses is brandishing a short sword in one hand toward right while holding his other hand palm up. The sign has three similar words written beneath each other.]
:Left: Fashion Police
:Right: Grammar Police
:Sign:
::Their
::They're
::There

:[Below the two groups are eight points with bullets:]
:*Judgemental and smug
:*Angry about something deeply arbitrary
:*Strong opinions backed by style guides
:*Appreciate that the way that you are interpreted ''is'' your responsibility
:*Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own
:*To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well
:*Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class
:*Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I just realized these are literally the same people

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Portmanteau]]

1735: Fashion Police and Grammar Police

2016-09-20T21:42:32Z

WingedCat: /* Explanation */ Typo fix (yeah, yeah, meta on the subject of the comic, but a typo is still a typo)

{{comic
| number = 1735
| date = September 19, 2016
| title = Fashion Police and Grammar Police
| image = fashion_police_and_grammar_police.png
| titletext = * Mad about jorts
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|For those that are not native English speakers, the way the three "T" words are mixed up (and maybe even their meaning) should be explained as that is part of the joke, and can not always be understood by those who are not with the G-force (aka Grammar Police).}}

In this comic, two groups of angry protesters are presented and labeled. They should not be seen as protesting side by side, but rather like two similar groups protesting about different things even though they are in many ways similar.

The left group represents the '''Fashion Police''' with [[Cueball]] holding a sign saying {{w|Crocs}} not allowed (by showing a pair of Crocs shoes in a circle with a strike through it). Crocs are a type of {{w|Clog|clogs}} made of foam. There may be some ergonomic advantages to these special looking shoes, but they will {{w|Crocs#Fashion|never become fashionable}}. It is not the first time [[Randall]] mocks a special type of shoes (although here it may not so much be himself that are against Crocs, but rather he just chose something easy to recognize that the Fashion Police would hate). Previously in [[1065: Shoes]] Randall was after shoes that ''has those creepy individual toes'' like {{w|Vibram FiveFingers}}. They will also never be a hit with the Fashion Police.

The right group represents the '''Grammar Police''' with another Cueball holding a sign with three commonly-confused words beneath each other; [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/their Their] (belongs to them), [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/they%27re They're] (contraction meaning "they are"), [https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/there There] (a location). The words are written on the sign to explain that there is a difference between these three almost identically-sounding words as many people confuse them with each other, and then the Grammar Police ''have'' to correct them (see [[386: Duty Calls]]). See the [https://twitter.com/_grammar_ Grammar Police on Twitter] and also {{w|Grammar Police|Linguistic prescription}} which comes up on Wikipedia when searching for Grammar Police!

The two groups look similar, standing in similar poses and apart from one Cueball holding signs in each group, one [[Megan]] is also in the front line of both groups. [[Hairy]] is only shown with the fashion police, together with yet another [[:Category:Multiple Cueballs|Cueball-like guy]], while [[Ponytail]] is only shown with the grammar police together with a bald man with glasses.

Both types of police are groups of people who make fun of others who wear or say something that doesn't meet their criteria of "good". Fashion police are people who make fun of others who wear clothing that is mismatched, out of style/{{w|fashion}} or straight-up "ugly" to them. Grammar police are people who are "sticklers" to {{w|grammar}} rules and get mad or contradictory if someone uses non-standard grammar in a sentence. The comic explains how the two groups are similar to each other by listing eight points (plus a ninth in the title text) that can be used on both groups. See explanation in the [[#Table of individual items|table below]].

In the caption below the comic Randall notes that he just realized that these are literally the same people because they both exhibit the listed traits. The use of "[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/literally literally]" to emphasize a statement is considered by the grammar police as a dread crime that should be pointed out as such, although the dictionaries already include this definition as acceptable. However it would likely be more appropriate to say figuratively the same people, see [[725: Literally]]. On the other hand, fashion police is known for overusing "literally" in the way the grammar police finds disgusting.

Since it seem like a safe assumption (see [[1339: When You Assume]]) that there are more grammar pedants (see title text of [[1652: Conditionals]]) than fashion police people who read xkcd, and it also would seem likely that many xkcd readers would dislike the Fashion Police (more), it seems likely that Randall is actually mainly targeting the Grammar Police people reading xkcd, than the fashion people who do not. They will not like to be compared to the Fashion Police! Ponytail also represented the grammar police in [[1576: I Could Care Less]], where Megan puts her in place after she polices her sentence. Thus this shows what Randall thinks about such police work and supports the assumption above. Literally was also used here in the title text.

Randall is, with regards to language, definitely one of those that can belong in this group: ''To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well.''

The title is a ninth point on the list with the star in front representing one more bullet (see the last entry in the [[#Table of individual items|table below]]):
*Mad about jorts.

==Table of individual items==
{| class="wikitable"
|+Explanation of individual items in the list
!list item
!Explanation
|-
|Judgemental and Smug || Both types of police will look down upon those who violate their 'laws'.
|-
|Angry about something deeply arbitrary || Both grammar and fashion are, essentially, made-up human constructs.
|-
| Strong opinions backed by style guides || Grammar has ''{{w|The Elements of Style}}'', fashion has fashion magazines.
|-
| Appreciate that the way that you are interpreted is your responsibility || Your choices in both grammar and fashion affect how people see you, and it would be silly to disclaim responsibility for what is essentially your own actions.
|-
| Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own || This means that even if you deliberately choose to not listen to the fashion gurus, then you are actually making a fashion statement anyway, as opposed to those that just don't realize they have a horrible style (and are not dressing wrongly on purpose). Both types can thus be harassed by the Fashion Police. Same goes for those who deliberately do not try to follow the grammar rules. They have thus taken a stance anyway as opposed to those who just do not know how to use grammar correctly. And both types can be harassed for it by the Grammar Police.
|-
|To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well || Deliberately violating fashion or grammar rules gives off a particular 'casual' vibe, distinct from those who violate the rules out of ignorance.
|-
|Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class || "Proper" dress and "proper" language are often defined in terms of how high class people dress and speak. But since "high class" in much of the Western world has generally meant white, alternative ways of dress (e.g. the Afro) or alternative ways of speaking (e.g. Ebonics or Pidgin English) are treated as somehow objectively "wrong", rather than simply as alternatives. Furthermore, dressing or speaking poorly are often marks of "lower class" people who for whatever reason cannot afford fashionable clothing, or don't have access to quality education. So when we judge people for their clothing or their speech, we are often indirectly judging them for their race and class. Randall identifies this fact as "uncomfortably transparent".
|-
| Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you|| This may have to do with the human tendency to view the morality of an activity differently when applied to oneself compared to a stranger.
|-
| Mad about jorts (Title text) || "{{w|Shorts#Jorts|Jorts}}" is a {{w|portmanteau}} for a pair of jeans that are made into shorts.

The fashion police would be mad about jorts for being unfashionable.

The grammar police would be mad about the word 'jorts' being an inappropriate portmanteau of jeans and shorts, and also for the fact that the sentence could be misinterpreted as if someone like jorts, as in being mad about something in a positive way.

{{w|Sentence_clause_structure#Incomplete_sentence|Also a fragment}}, with no subject (properly it would be "I am mad about jorts"). Randall has [[:Category:Portmanteau|often used]] portmanteaus as part of his jokes.

It is also possible that the Grammar police are indeed "mad about Jorts" in the positive sense, i.e Grammar Police love Jorts.
|}

==Transcript==
:[Beneath two headings to the left and right are shown two aggressive-looking groups of people with only the four people in the front clearly shown for each group. Behind them five other people can be seen, but they are not drawn with the same solid line and are only partly shown behind the first four, but legs from all five in each group can be seen along with some heads (all Cueball like) and arms etc. The front of the left group consist of Hairy holding a fist up towards left, Megan with her arms crossed in front of her chest, Cueball holding a sign, using both hands, straight up above his head and another Cueball-like guy to the right is holding up a broken branch in one hand toward right. The person behind this last person is shown to hold up his fist towards right like Hairy does to the left. The sign shows a Crocs shoe in a circle with a strike through it going above the Crocs from top left to bottom right. The front of the right group consist of Megan holding both her arms over her head hands folded into fist while looking towards left, Cueball holding a sign, using both hands, towards the right and up above Ponytails head, she is raising one hand in a fist to the left and finally a bald guy with glasses is brandishing a short sword in one hand toward right while holding his other hand palm up. The sign has three similar words written beneath each other.]
:Left: Fashion Police
:Right: Grammar Police
:Sign:
::Their
::They're
::There

:[Below the two groups are eight points with bullets:]
:*Judgemental and smug
:*Angry about something deeply arbitrary
:*Strong opinions backed by style guides
:*Appreciate that the way that you are interpreted ''is'' your responsibility
:*Understand that there's no way to "opt out" of sending messages by how you present yourself, and attempts to do so send strong messages of their own
:*To seem cool and casual, pretend to ignore them while understanding them very well
:*Vindictive about things that are often uncomfortably transparent proxies for race or social class
:*Fun to cheer on until one of them disagrees with you

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I just realized these are literally the same people

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Portmanteau]]