https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/api.php?action=feedcontributions&user=108.162.245.120&feedformat=atomexplain xkcd - User contributions [en]2024-03-28T11:32:03ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.30.0https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:what_if&diff=203853Talk:what if2020-12-30T21:09:31Z<p>108.162.245.120: added comment to discussion</p>
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<div>I moved the [[what if?]] page to here because I was unable to use the "move" ability as it kept showing "No input file specified".<span> โ [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>๐ฆ๐พ๐ฟ๐-๐ญ</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 06:44, 29 September 2020 (UTC)<br />
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I just noticed this: https://www.nytimes.com/2020/12/29/science/randall-munroe-question-popcorn.html It seems to be a continuation of what if in spirit but not in name, should we link to it from here?</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:135:_Substitute&diff=128584Talk:135: Substitute2016-10-13T07:14:26Z<p>108.162.245.120: </p>
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<div>[[User:Rikthoff|Rikthoff]] ([[User talk:Rikthoff|talk]]) The issue date is off, as i can't find a create date for the image. Can anyone fix?<br />
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:Yes, I've fixed the date on the page. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]] ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 15:30, 14 September 2012 (UTC)<br />
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1. It takes the raptor 25m/s / 4m/s^2 = 6.25s to reach it's top speed, during which I can run 6.25s * 6m/s = 37.5m. Add on my 40m head start, and I can reach a spot 77.5m away from the raptor before he gets me. In the same time, the raptor can run 4m/s^2 * (6.25s)^2 / 2 = 78.125m. I'm eaten before he's fully up to speed. <br />
Therefore, I have to solve for when the raptors location, r(t) = 4m/s^2 * t^2 /2 - 40, and my location, m(t) = 6m/s*t, are equal. Dropping units, we get 2t^2 -40 = 6t, or 2t^2 - 6t - 40 = 0. Dividing by 2 I get t^2 - 3t - 20=0. Using the quadratic equation, I get (3 +/- sqrt(89))/2, roughly equal to 6.217s and -3.217s. Plugging that back into m(t), I get 37.302m for my terminal run. [[User:Blaisepascal|Blaisepascal]] ([[User talk:Blaisepascal|talk]]) 22:18, 14 September 2012 (UTC)<br />
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I don't think there is enough information to solve the second problem, because you don't know how fast the non-injured raptors go. Unless you take that information from the first problem. But then, how fast does the wounded raptor accelerate? You would have to find the angle where the wounded and the closest non-wounded raptor would meet you at the same time. [[Special:Contributions/213.127.132.140|213.127.132.140]] 17:17, 5 September 2013 (UTC)<br />
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With all three raptors and you running at top speeds, I don't think you get caught by the injured raptor and uninjured raptor at the same time. I believe that you must run directly towards the wounded raptor and the two non-injuried raptors will reach you simultaneously before you and the injured raptor meet, and you cannot do better. After all, you can try to run directly away from an uninjured raptor, but you will lose ground to it at a rate of 25-6=19 m/s (but, it is worst for the other uninjured raptor). By running directly at the injured raptor, you lose ground from it at the rate of 10+6=16 m/s. However, if you can accelerate at a rate far above the raptors, I think you could change directions so fast that one raptor could not catch you. However, I am not sure you can keep away from all three indefinitely. --DrMath 04:01, 24 October 2013 (UTC)<br />
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I did the math and if you run directly towards the wounded raptor it will catch you before the uninjured raptors do. (It would be better to run directly away from the uninjured raptor than it would be to run towards it, but that still not the answer.) As you would cover ~8m if you ran at the wounded raptor and survive for ~1.33s where as the uninjured raptors (assuming they rundirectly towards the point you meet the wounded raptor would take ~2.9s to reach this point. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.178.116|162.158.178.116]] 00:35, 8 October 2016 (UTC)<br />
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For 1 and 2 the solution depends on whether the raptors can accelerate at 2m/s, or they actually increase their speed at this rate. If they just accelerate, It should be possible to do tight circles, and even wind yourself slowly towards another location. I believe this is possible even treating yourself and the raptors as point masses. [[Special:Contributions/2.102.215.18|2.102.215.18]] 13:19, 17 July 2013 (UTC)<br />
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This could also be a parody of Snape substituting for Lupin (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban) in the Defense against Dark Arts class. Snape assigns homework on werewolves, in the hopes of one of the students connecting the dots. Here, Randall might be trying to get the students to suspect that Mrs.Lenhart might be a raptor (out of sympathy, or just being a classhole?). Also [[155]]. [[Special:Contributions/208.124.118.63|208.124.118.63]] 18:58, 1 October 2013 (UTC)BK201<br />
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There is a problem with the test, as Mr. Munroe wrote it: Question #1 says that a raptor has a top speed of 25 m/s, but question #3 says "Remember, raptors run at 10 m/s...". Furthermore, question #2 says an injured raptor runs at 10 m/s.<br />
:The way I resolved that was that raptors wouldn't be able to run straight long enough to reach their top speed inside of a building. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.237.161|108.162.237.161]] 23:53, 27 April 2015 (UTC)<br />
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BTW, the answer to question #2 is: run straight toward the injured raptor. The uninjured raptors will run toward you and the injured raptor. Just as you get close to the injured one, slide under his legs. Because he is injured, the uninjured raptors will feast on him instead of you. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.55.227|173.245.55.227]] 20:58, 13 December 2013 (UTC)<br />
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:This presumes the raptors are cannibalistic. -Pennpenn [[Special:Contributions/162.158.2.221|162.158.2.221]] 05:30, 15 June 2015 (UTC)<br />
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::In the original Jurassic park book, the little children get chased through the hatchery, and they try to use a baby raptor to distract the raptors chasing them, but the small raptor gets ripped to shreds. Raptors are merciless and horrible beings. Randall is right to hate them.[[User:RedHatGuy68|RedHatGuy68]] ([[User talk:RedHatGuy68|talk]]) 01:28, 29 October 2015 (UTC)<br />
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::I solved it by being a t-rex and just eating the raptors. It's amazing how many math problems become easier when you're a t-rex. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.255.69|162.158.255.69]] 23:29, 16 September 2015 (UTC)<br />
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What if they're utahraptors or nanotyranus [[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.120|108.162.245.120]] 07:14, 13 October 2016 (UTC)</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1037:_Umwelt&diff=1285551037: Umwelt2016-10-12T08:45:36Z<p>108.162.245.120: /* Google Chrome-2 */</p>
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<div>{{comic<br />
| number = 1037<br />
| date = April 1, 2012<br />
| title = Umwelt<br />
| image = umwelt_the_void.jpg<br />
| titletext = Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit--from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your web browser.<br />
}}<br />
<div class="toclimit-3" style="float:right; margin-left: 10px;">__TOC__</div><br />
<br />
==Explanation==<br />
An {{w|Umwelt}}, as the title text explains, is the idea that one's entire way of thinking is dependent on their surroundings. Thus, this {{w|April Fools}} comic changes based on the browser, location, or referrer. Thus, what the viewer is viewing the comic on, where they live, or where they came from determines which comic they actually see. As a result, there are actually multiple comics that went up on April Fools' Day, although only one is seen.<br />
(Fun Fact: the German word "Umwelt" does not mean anything vaguely similar; it translates in all contexts almost exactly as "environment".)<br />
<br />
Information about how the wide variety of data was collected and credit for the viewers who contributed can be found [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/rnst4/april_fools_xkcd_changing_comic/ here].<br />
<br />
This comic was released on April 1 even though that was [[:Category:Sunday comics|a Sunday]] (only the third comic to be released on a Sunday). But it was only due to the April Fool joke, as it did replace the comic that would have been scheduled for Monday, April 2. The next comic was first released on Wednesday, April 4.<br />
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===The Void===<br />
[[File:umwelt the void.jpg]]<br />
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If the device or browser you are using does not support Javascript, you will simply see a static image of a white swirl on a dark background.<br />
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Possible reference to The Ring (http://imgur.com/wlGmm), as though to suggest that using an alternative browser is dismal and horrific.<br />
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Davean (xkcd's sysadmin): "[This] comic isn't available everywhere and it can come up i[n] some situation[s] only for recognized browsers."<br />
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Browser: Alternative Browser<br />
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===Aurora===<br />
[[File:umwelt aurora.png]]<br />
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One could interpret that since Megan didn't go out and therefore missed seeing the {{w|Aurora}} (norther lights), Cueball in his [[1350:_Lorenz#Knit_Cap_Girl|knit cap]] lied about it. That way, she wouldn't have felt sad that she missed out. Another interpretation could be that he decides that since she did not even bother to go outside to see such a spectacular sight he will not tell her about it. And yet another could be that he did not think it was interesting.<br />
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This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.<br />
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Locations: Canada, Boston, Maine, New York, Ohio, Oregon, Texas, Minnesota, Norway, Denmark, France, Rhode Island (not sure if mobile only or not.)<br />
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In [[1302: Year in Review]] another Megan (for sure) has a completely different approach to the chance of seeing northern lights, as that was the only event she was looking forward to in 2013, and it failed.<br />
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===Snake===<br />
[[File:umwelt snake composite 1024.png]]<br />
[[:File:umwelt snake composite.png|Full size]]<br />
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The joke here is the extreme length of snakes. The world's longest snake is the python, the longest ever being 33 feet or approx. 10 meters. The red and blue circles refer to the hit game {{w|Portal}}.<br />
There is also a reference to the book "The Little Prince" in the second panel.<br />
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Also, the number and content of the panels changes depending on the size of your browser window.<br />
<br />
This image changed based on the size of the browser window including different panels at different sizes.<br />
<br />
Specific AltText for this image: Umwelt is the idea that because their senses pick up on different things, different animals in the same ecosystem actually live in very different worlds. Everything about you shapes the world you inhabit -from your ideology to your glasses prescription to your browser window size.<br />
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Location: Texas (on Chrome Version 33.0.1750.154 m), New Jersey, California (on Chrome Version 39.0.2171.95), Maryland, Massachusetts (Safari for iOS), Connecticut (Safari for iOS), Virginia (on Chrome), Michigan (Firefox v46.0.1).<br />
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===Black Hat===<br />
[[File:umwelt tortoise 1024.png]]<br />
[[:File:umwelt tortoise.png|Full size]]<br />
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Cueball as an analyst attempts to psychoanalyze [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] [[72: Classhole|classhole]] tendencies. Cueball's quote and the whole setup is a direct reference to the movie {{w|Blade Runner}} (1982) and Black Hat is taking the Voight-Kampff test which is used to identify replicants from real humans.<br />
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Black Hat's reason for not helping the tortoise is that ''it ''''knows''' what it did'' and thus in Black Hat's world view it deserves being turned over. The final part of the joke is that when zooming out it turns out that there is a tortoise behind Black Hat and he has actually already turned it over for what it did.<br />
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Location: Seems to appear mostly in "other countries" โ those without location-specific comics.<br />
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===Too Quiet===<br />
[[File:umwelt too quiet 1024.png]]<br />
[[:File:umwelt too quiet.png|Full size]]<br />
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A reference to {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}} which has been [[87: Velociraptors|constantly]] [[135: Substitute|referred]] [[1110: Click and Drag|to]] [[155: Search History|before]] [[758: Raptor Fences|in]] this comic.<br />
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Also referencing the film {{w|2 Fast 2 Furious|2 Fast 2 Furious}}, an entertaining, yet intellectually unprovoking sequel in a popular film franchise, which is aimed at teenagers and young adults, prompting the blunt response from the stickman. The fact that Steve would use such a clichรฉ {{w|2000s (decade)|noughties}} movie term in such an intense moment, and the subsequent curse, is the joke in this comic.<br />
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Location: short version โ iPhone 5c Safari browser in Texas, iPhone 5 Chrome Browser in Minnesota, long version - Google Chrome browser in Indiana, Windows 8 Laptop<br />
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===Pond===<br />
[[File:umwelt pond mobile.png]][[File:umwelt pond wide.png]]<br />
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Two different versions showed, the narrower version for mobile devices.<br />
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Location: The Netherlands and various other countries.<br />
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===Galaxies===<br />
[[File:umwelt galaxies 1024.jpg]]<br />
[[:File:umwelt galaxies.jpg|Full size]]<br />
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Megan is distracted from her conversation with [[Cueball]] by realizing that the space behind his head, from her vantage point, contains millions of galaxies. This is similar to an [http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/image/astro/hst_deep_field.jpg incredible photograph] taken by the Hubble Telescope, in which a tiny dark area of space in fact contained numerous galaxies.<br />
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The title text is an imaginative leap from this scenario: that the galaxies would be up to no good once Cueball is turned away from them. This is presumably a reference to [http://www.mariowiki.com/boo Boo], an enemy from certain Mario games who moves toward Mario only when Mario is facing away from Boo.<br />
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This comic was only reported once... the intended environmental context is a mystery.<br />
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Location: unknown<br />
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===xkcd Gold===<br />
[[File:umwelt xkcd gold.png]]<br />
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This is probably a reference to the 4chan Gold Account, an implementation on 4chan that does not actually exist, and is usually used to trick newcomers into revealing their credit card numbers. The joke is that "Gold Account" users can supposedly block other users from viewing images they have posted. The fifth panel is probably a reference to Beecock, a notorious set of shocker images. 4chan's moderators have been known to give out "beecock bans" or "/z/ bans" to particularly annoying users, which redirect the user to a page containing beecock and the text "OH NO THE BOARD IS GONE".<br />
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Referrer: 4chan<br />
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===Yo Mama===<br />
[[File:umwelt dog ballast.png]]<br />
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Possible reference to Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s "{{w|Harrison Bergeron}}."<br />
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Possibly a veiled criticism of Facebook. This could be slightly rewritten as: "This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid of dissent, so it tracks everyone at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop submitting information to Facebook. But that dystopian future is now."<br />
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Referrer: Facebook<br />
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===Reddit===<br />
[[File:umwelt reddit.png]]<br />
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Reference to referencing, because Reddit, as a referring site, likes references to its referencing in its references.<br />
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This comic also features recursive imagery similar to [[688: Self-Description|Self Description]] where the second panel embeds the entire comic within itself.<br />
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Referrer: Reddit<br />
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===Buns and Hot dogs===<br />
[[File:umwelt somethingawful.jpg]]<br />
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This is a reference to the question "Why do hot dogs come in packages of 6 while buns come in packages of 8?"<br />
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Referrer: SomethingAwful, Questionable Content, & MetaFilter<br />
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===Twitter===<br />
[[File:umwelt twitter.jpg]]<br />
<br />
A summary of the content "typically" found on Twitter.<br />
<br />
In the tweet feed, there are three tweets about some podcast on the top, followed by the tweet containing link they clicked on to get to the comic, tweets about Rob Delaney, unspecified passive-aggressive tweets, and a tweet from [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horse_ebooks Horse Ebooks] retweeted by one of the users the reader follows.<br />
<br />
On the left, the topmost dialog, with profile information, shows that the user has posted 1,302 tweets, but only follows 171 people and has even fewer followers, at a measly 48. This is marked with a sad face, implying that the user wants more followers.<br />
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Below that is the "who to follow" dialog, which is written up as consisting of "assholes".<br />
<br />
Below that is the "trending tags" dialog for the United States. It is full of tags about word games, tags about misogyny, and tags about Justin Bieber.<br />
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Below that is an unidentified dialog full of "stuff your eyes automatically ignore". And finally, on the bottom is the background colour, which is "a really pleasant blue".<br />
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Referrer: Twitter<br />
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===Wikipedia===<br />
[[File:umwelt wikipedia wide.jpg]]<br />
[[File:umwelt wikipedia mobile.png]]<br />
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The term {{w|Mile High Club}} (or MHC) is a slang term applied collectively to individuals who have had sexual intercourse while on board of an aircraft. Randall says that reading the news articles on it has distracted him from making that comic.<br />
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Two different versions shown, the narrower version (the single panel with all the text) for mobile devices.<br />
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Referrer: Wikipedia<br />
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===Google Chrome===<br />
[[File:umwelt chrome1.jpg]]<br />
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{{w|Sergey Brin}} (born August 21, 1973) is an American computer scientist and Internet entrepreneur who, with Larry Page, co-founded Google, one of the most profitable Internet companies. As of 2013, his personal wealth was estimated to be $24.4 billion. Randall makes the joke that as the founder of Google, Brin's permission would be needed to use Google Chrome. Because there are millions of people who use Google, it is likely that at least some of the time Brin would be asleep, thus he would need to be woken.<br />
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Browser: Chrome<br />
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===Chrome/Firefox===<br />
[[File:umwelt chrome2.png]]<br />
<br />
Mozilla {{w|Firefox}} is a free and open-source web browser developed for Windows, OS X, and Linux, with a mobile version for Android and iOS, by the Mozilla Foundation and its subsidiary, the Mozilla Corporation. Cueball is complaining about {{w|Google Chrome}}, to which [[Ponytail]] replies that there is an {{w|add-on}} that fixes what he is complaining about. When questioned, she replies that the add-on is Firefox, which isn't an add-on at all and is instead a different browser.<br />
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Browser: Chrome<br />
<br />
===Google Chrome-2===<br />
[[File:umwelt chrome3.png]]<br />
<br />
This panel references Google Chrome's error screen, which shows a puzzle piece. The comic humorously implies that Chrome is looking for that piece. When completing jigsaw puzzles, a common strategy is to figure out where the pieces must be from their geometry rather than from the picture they create. In this case, the text suggests that Chrome believes the puzzle piece connects to the pieces which form one of the corners of the puzzle, which may seem impossible because any piece that links up to a corner would usually have at least one flat edge, which this piece has none. However, more complicated puzzles have complex shapes and are not always simply approximate squares with tabs and blanks.<br />
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Browser: Chrome or silk on desktop veiw<br />
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===Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing===<br />
[[File:umwelt firefox incognito.png]]<br />
<br />
Another reference to crashing web browsers.<br />
<br />
Browser: Firefox (Incognito only?)<br />
<br />
===Internet Explorer===<br />
[[File:umwelt ie.png]]<br />
<br />
Yet another reference to crashing web browsers<br />
<br />
Browser: Internet Explorer<br />
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===Maxthon===<br />
[[File:umwelt maxthon.png]]<br />
<br />
Browser: Maxthon<br />
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===Netscape Navigator===<br />
[[File:umwelt netscape womanoctopus.png]]<br />
<br />
[[File:umwelt netscape man.png]]<br />
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{{w|Netscape Navigator}} was a web browser popular in the 1990s.<br />
<br />
Browser: Netscape<br />
<br />
===Rockmelt===<br />
[[File:umwelt rockmelt.png]]<br />
<br />
{{w|Rockmelt}} is a social-media-based browser.<br />
<br />
Reference to the gospel song {{w|Longing for Old Virginia: Their Complete Victor Recordings (1934)|"There's no hiding place down here" by The Carter Family}}, later covered by Stephen Stills.<br />
<br />
:I run to the rock just to hide my face<br />
:And the rocks cried out, no hiding place<br />
:There's no hiding place down here<br />
<br />
It may additionally be a reference to the ''Babylon 5'' episode "And the Rock Cried Out, No Hiding Place," which featured the song.<br />
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Browser: Rockmelt<br />
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===Plugin Disabled===<br />
[[File:umwelt plugin disabled.png]]<br />
<br />
When the Google Chrome web browser does not have the required software (called a plug-in) to display a web page's content, it displays a puzzle piece icon and an error message. In this case, Chrome informs the user that the content is impossible to display. <br />
<br />
Browser: Plugin (?) Disabled, Safari Desktop<br />
<br />
===Corporate Networks===<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate general.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate amazon chrome.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate amazon firefox.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate amazon other.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate google chrome.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate microsoft chrome.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate microsoft firefox.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate microsoft other.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate nytimes chrome.png]]<br />
[[File:umwelt corporate nytimes other.png]]<br />
<br />
These error messages appear if the user is on a network owned by one of the corporations noted. The error message includes a warning against speaking on the company's behalf.<br />
<br />
ISP: Corporate networks of Amazon, Google, Microsoft, NY Times<br />
<br />
===Military===<br />
[[File:umwelt military.png]]<br />
<br />
[[Cueball]] assumes that anyone using a military network has an important job like watching for incoming missiles. He includes a thank-you to the user for their military service.<br />
<br />
ISP: Military networks<br />
<br />
===T-Mobile===<br />
[[File:umwelt tmobile.png]]<br />
<br />
Reference to T-Mobile's distinguishing feature (at the time it was written) of weaker coverage, in relation to other major providers.<br />
<br />
ISP: T-Mobile<br />
<br />
===Verizon and AT&T===<br />
[[File:umwelt verizon.png]]<br />
<br />
[[File:umwelt att.png]]<br />
<br />
Reference to Verizon and AT&T's scandals/controversy regarding implementation of bandwidth caps.<br />
<br />
ISP: Verizon and AT&T<br />
<br />
===France===<br />
[[File:umwelt france.jpg]]<br />
<br />
A common joke about France is that the nation does not win wars. This originated from France's annexation by Germany during World War II, and America's late entry into the war, which is sometimes portrayed humorously as a case of America 'saving' Europe, in this joke particularly France (the role of the French resistance is usually not mentioned), leading to a common American joke at the expense of France's military prowess [http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/victories.html][http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blpic-frenchmilitaryvictories.htm][http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokefrenchmilitaryhistory.htm]. When France did not form part of the coalition that invaded Iraq in 2003, aligning with the many countries that condemned U.S. action, the joke was revived. <br />
<br />
A Google search of "French Military Victories" + 'I'm feeling lucky' used to direct to "did you mean: french military defeats" (due to a {{w|Google bomb}}). Cueball is trying to show this to his friend, who is French. However, his joke backfires, as his friends immediately points out that the stereotype of France not having military victories is undercut by the fact that one of the most innovative military commanders in history, Napoleon, was French, and in fact conquered much of Europe.<br />
<br />
The last line of the comic further implies that Cueball is not as smart as he thinks he is in regards to anything French, as he mispronounces the French loan word "touche".<br />
<br />
Locations: France & Quebec<br />
<br />
===Germany===<br />
[[File:umwelt germany.png]]<br />
<br />
This comic references the {{w|Berlin airlift#The start of the Berlin Airlift|Berlin Airlift}}, a relief measure for citizens in West Berlin (surrounded by East Germany) instituted by the Western Allies after World War II. In reality, the Western Allies flew a grand total of 500,000 tons of food over the Soviet blockade in planes. Randall puts a twist on this event by making it more fun: dropping supplies from a grand chairlift. The play on words is that "chairlift" rhymes with "airlift" and thus makes an easy substitution. The chair force is also a name that other service branches use to make fun of the air force.<br />
<br />
Location: Germany<br />
<br />
===Israel===<br />
[[File:umwelt israel.png]]<br />
<br />
Transcript:<br />
<br />
ืืืืจื: ืืื, ืคืืฉืชื ืืืืจ ื ืืืจ! ืืื ืืื ืื ืืืืื.โ<br />
<br />
...<br />
<br />
ืจืืข, ืื ืืช ืืืืจืช, "ืื ืื ืื ื ืื"?โ<br />
<br />
ืื ื ืืืืจื ืืืืืืืช.โ<br />
<br />
(Translation from Hebrew)<br />
<br />
Person: Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.<br />
<br />
A reference to the multiple use of the word Jewish to denote both a religious group and a nationality/ethnicity.<br />
<br />
Location: Israel<br />
<br />
===Carnot Cycle===<br />
[[File:umwelt japan.png]]<br />
<br />
A pun on "cycle"; a "{{w|Carnot cycle}}" is a thermodynamic cycle (e.g. refrigeration). Its efficiency depends on the temperature of the hot and cold 'reservoirs' in which it is operating. The icon on the side of the motorcycle resembles a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Carnot_cycle_p-V_diagram.svg graph of the Carnot cycle.]<br />
<br />
Location: Japan<br />
<br />
===UK===<br />
[[File:umwelt uk.jpg]]<br />
<br />
He worded this as though to imply that the UK is a state of the U.S., and an unimportant one at that, which pokes fun at the UK, creating a paradox (sort of).<br />
<br />
Location: UK<br />
<br />
===Blizzard===<br />
[[File:umwelt disasters blizzard.png]]<br />
<br />
This comic is aimed at the debate over whether earthquakes or blizzards are harsher conditions to live under.<br />
<br />
For each location this displayed in, the state name was substituted in the third panel.<br />
<br />
Locations: Alabama, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Georgia, Halifax, Illinois, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, the Northeast, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Texas, Toronto, Tennessee, New York, Wisconsin<br />
<br />
===Tornado===<br />
[[File:umwelt disasters tornado.png]]<br />
<br />
This comic is aimed at the debate over whether earthquakes or tornadoes are harsher conditions to live under.<br />
<br />
For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.<br />
<br />
Locations: Alabama, Dallas, Illinois, Georgia, The Midwest, Missouri, Ohio, Oklahoma, Ottawa, Tennessee, Texas<br />
<br />
===Hurricane===<br />
[[File:umwelt disasters hurricane.png]]<br />
<br />
This comic is aimed at the debate over whether earthquakes or hurricanes are harsher conditions to live under.<br />
<br />
For each location this displayed in the state name was substituted in the third panel.<br />
<br />
Locations: D.C, Florida, Georgia, Houston, Miami, New Jersey, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia<br />
<br />
===Lake Diver Killer===<br />
[[File:umwelt lake diver.png]]<br />
<br />
This comic shows a news reporter standing in front of a lake. She is reporting on a serial killer who targets divers. As more divers are sent in to investigate and/or search for bodies, more divers go missing and are presumably murdered. <br />
<br />
Location: Bay Areas, Metro Detroit, Vermont showed an image specifically referencing Lake Champlain<br />
<br />
===Lincoln Memorial===<br />
[[File:umwelt lincoln memorial.png]]<br />
<br />
Locations: Illinois & Washington D.C.<br />
<br />
===Helicopter Hunting===<br />
[[File:umwelt helicoptor.png]]<br />
<br />
In Alaska, governments and individuals have {{w|Wolf hunting#North America 2|shot wolves en masse from helicopters}} in an attempt to artificially inflate populations of game, such as moose and caribou, to make hunting them easier. This is opposed by many, as the game populations are not endangered (thus, this threatens ecological balance); wolves are a small threat to livestock in North America; most of the wolf body โincluding meat and bonesโ goes wasted as they are sought mainly for their pelts.<br />
<br />
Location: Alaska<br />
<br />
===Newspaper===<br />
[[File:umwelt life scientists.png]][[File:umwelt life rit.png]][[File:umwelt life umass.png]]<br />
<br />
Creating new life has long been a well understood process, in a lab or otherwise.<br />
<br />
Location: Various<br />
<br />
Specific versions appeared for RIT and UMass Amherst<br />
<br />
===Robot Paul Revere===<br />
[[File:umwelt paul revere.png]]<br />
<br />
Combination of the legend of {{w|Paul Revere#"Midnight Ride"|Paul Revere}} and computer binary.<br />
<br />
Location: Boston<br />
<br />
===Counting Cards===<br />
<!-- card counting explanation needed. --><br />
All four colleges in this series are in Massachusetts and, being similar, in pairs, rival each other to some extent (Harvard-MIT, and Smith-Wellesley). The comic contains a reference to the {{w|MIT Blackjack Team}}, which entered popular culture via the {{w|21 (2008 film)|film 21}}, and a possible reference to Orwell's book '1984' and/or {{w|Chain of Command (Star Trek: The Next Generation)|popular homage to it via Star Trek}}: "There are four lights."[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChYIm6MW39k]<br />
<br />
Bonus: The thought-gears in panel 3 are spinning against each other.<br />
<br />
Location: Harvard<br />
<br />
[[File:umwelt counting cards harvard.png]]<br />
<br />
Location: MIT<br />
<br />
[[File:umwelt counting cards mit.png]]<br />
<br />
"Course 15s" at MIT are the business major students, often mocked for taking a less-rigorous program.<br />
<br />
Location: Smith<br />
<br />
[[File:umwelt counting cards smith.png]]<br />
<br />
Location: Wellesley<br />
<br />
[[File:umwelt counting cards wellesley.png]]<br />
<br />
Both Wellesley and Smith are all-women colleges in Massachusetts.<br />
<br />
===Giant Box Trap===<br />
[[File:umwelt box trap.png]]<br />
<br />
Randall got his undergrad in Physics at the {{w|Christopher Newport University}}, and was scheduled to return shortly to give a talk.<br />
<br />
Location: Christopher Newport University<br />
<br />
===Chemo Support===<br />
[[File:umwelt chemo.jpg]]<br />
<br />
[[Cueball]] has shaved his head in support of people going through {{w|chemotherapy}} but, as he is always depicted as a stick figure with no hair, no one can tell.<br />
<br />
Randall's now-wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and apparently DFCI is where they've been spending much of their time.<br />
<br />
Location: Dana-Farber Cancer Institute<br />
<br />
===Reviews===<br />
[[File:reviews.png]]<br />
<br />
The previous strip appears twice when using [[wikipedia:Tor (anonymity network)|Tor]].<br />
<br />
Browser: Any using Tor, xkcd API (JSON, RSS, Atom), w3m, and reports of seeing it on a Kindle Fire HD<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
:[Note to courageous readers- The transcript has been reordered in the order in which the comics appear in the picture and appropriate names have been given.]<br />
<br />
:'''The Void'''<br />
:[An epic void with a bright light shining right on you.]<br />
<br />
:'''Aurora'''<br />
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]<br />
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar flare that's causing some Great Aurorae. CBC says they may even be visible here! Wanna drive out to see?<br />
:Megan: Hockey's on.<br />
:Cueball: Ok. Later.<br />
<br />
:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]<br />
<br />
:Megan: See anything?<br />
:Cueball: No, just clouds.<br />
:Megan: Not surprised.<br />
<br />
:'''Aurora-US'''<br />
:[Cueball heading out past Megan comfortably sitting in front of a desk.]<br />
:Cueball: Apparently there's a solar storm causing northern lights over Canada. CNN say they might even be visible {Options: "As Far South As Us", "Here in Boston", "Maine", "Ohio", "Oregon", "New York"}! Wanna drive out to see?<br />
:Megan: It's cold out.<br />
:Cueball: Ok. Later.<br />
<br />
:[An expansive, marvelous image of emerald green northern lights, floating down through the sky.]<br />
<br />
:Megan: See anything?<br />
:Cueball: No, just clouds.<br />
:Megan: Not surprised.<br />
<br />
:'''Snake'''<br />
:[Two people standing next to each other. Megan is holding the head end of a snake. Depending on the width of your browser, the snake is: three frames, the third of which has a little bit of a bump; the first frame has a human-size bump, the second has a third person looking at the snake, and the third has the snake going though two Portals; a squirrel and the human-size bump in the first frame, a ring next to the third person in the second frame, and Beret Guy riding the snake in front of the portal; or The squirrel, a fourth person within the snake being coiled, and the human bump in the first frame, the ring, a fifth person in love, and the third person in the second frame, Beret Guy and the portal in the third frame, and the same two people in the fourth frame.]<br />
<br />
:Megan: I found a snake, but then I forgot to stop.<br />
<br />
:'''Black hat'''<br />
:[Two people sitting at a desk. One is Black Hat. The other is an analyst. Black Hat has a number of terminals attached to his head.]<br />
:Analyst: You come across a tortoise in the desert. You flip it over. It struggles to right itself. You watch. You're not helping. Why is that?<br />
<br />
:Black Hat: It '''knows''' what it did.<br />
<br />
:[View of the entire scene, with said turtle off in the distance on its back and trying to right itself.]<br />
<br />
:'''Too quiet'''<br />
:[A group of four scale down a wall into a field in the middle of the night. They walk off single-file.]<br />
:Person 1: It's quiet.<br />
<br />
:Person 3: Yeah - *Too* quiet.<br />
<br />
:[A Velociraptor is off in the distance, following the group.]<br />
:Person 4: Yeah - too *too* quiet.<br />
<br />
:Person 2: Yeah - 2quiet2furious.<br />
:Person 1: Fuck off, Steve.<br />
<br />
:'''Pond'''<br />
:[A landscape showing a pond, some reeds, and a set of mountains off in the distance.]<br />
<br />
:'''Galaxies'''<br />
:[A trio of galaxies.]<br />
:Galaxy 1: He's not looking!<br />
:Galaxy 3: Let's get him!<br />
:[Lines draw in illustrating the eye-line of one of a pair of people.]<br />
:Cueball: So he said he didn't get the text, but c'mon, he *never* misses texts. Right? ..hello?<br />
:Megan: I'm just staring at your head freaked out by the fact that there are millions of galaxies *directly behind it*.<br />
<br />
:'''xkcd Gold'''<br />
:[Cueball holding bat.]<br />
<br />
:Cueball: Sorry, but this comic<br />
<br />
:[Cueball starts to wind up.]<br />
<br />
:Cueball: requires<br />
<br />
:[Cueball prepares to strike with bat.]<br />
<br />
:Cueball: XKCD<br />
<br />
:[Cueball swings at a beehive.]<br />
:GOLD<br />
<br />
:[Penis Bees fly out of the beehive.]<br />
<br />
:'''Yo mamma'''<br />
:[Cueball yells at a friend.]<br />
:Cueball: Oh yeah? Well you mama's so ''cynical'', her only dog ballast is a ''leash''!<br />
:(This comic takes place in a dystopian future where the government is afraid dogs can hover, so it requires them to wear weights at all times, and some people privately doubt the government, but not enough to stop buying dog weights.)<br />
<br />
:'''Reddit'''<br />
:Five seconds ago:<br />
:[You sitting in front of a desk, reading a reddit thread.]<br />
:You: Oh, hey, reddit has a link to some XKCD april fools comic.<br />
<br />
:Now: [An image of the xkcd comic page.]<br />
:Five seconds from now:<br />
<br />
:You: ..hey<br />
<br />
:30 seconds from now:<br />
:[DANCE PARTY!]<br />
<br />
:'''Buns and Hot dogs'''<br />
:Cueball: What I wanna know is why do hot dogs come in packages of six while buns come in these huge sacks of ash and blood from which "Ave Maria" is faintly audible?<br />
:[Chanting sacks of gore in the background.]<br />
<br />
:'''Twitter'''<br />
:[A Twitter account page with the following: Many tweets, fewer following, even fewer followers, A bunch of assholes in the suggested follow box, trending topics partitioned into: Word Games, Misogyny, and Bieber, stuff your eyes automatically ignore, A really pleasant blue. and the timeline: Something about a podcast, Someone confused because the description doesn't match the link, The link you clicked on to get to this comic, Rob Delaney, Passive Aggression, and horse ebooks.]<br />
<br />
:'''Wikipedia'''<br />
:[There's no comic here because instead of drawing one, I spent the last hour reading every news story cited in the Wikipedia article on The Mile High Club.]<br />
<br />
:'''Google Chrome'''<br />
:[A Chrome plugin error page.]<br />
:Chrome: This plugin requires Sergey Brin's permission to run. Please wait while he is woken.<br />
<br />
:'''Chrome/Firefox'''<br />
:[Two people; Cueball is sitting at a desk in front of a laptop.]<br />
:Cueball: Man, chrome's hardware acceleration really sucks.<br />
:Ponytail: Oh - Theres' a great add-on that fixes it.<br />
:Cueball: Oh? What's it called?<br />
:Ponytail: "Firefox".<br />
<br />
:'''Google Chrome-2'''<br />
:[A Chrome plugin error page with the characteristic jigsaw piece.]<br />
:Chrome: Chrome is looking for this piece. Have you seen it? Chrome thinks it links up with a corner.<br />
<br />
:'''Mozilla Firefox Private Browsing'''<br />
:[Firefox error page.]<br />
:Firefox: Well, this is embarrassing. You know how I'm not supposed to peek at your browsing in private mode? Firefox.. is sorry. Firefox will not blame you if you<br />
:[Button with text.]<br />
:Click here to report this incident.<br />
<br />
:'''Internet Explorer'''<br />
:[IE error page.]<br />
:IE: Error: Internet Explorer has given up.<br />
<br />
:'''Maxthon'''<br />
:Cueball: Maxthon? Hey, 2005 called. Didn't say anything. All I could hear was sobbing. This is getting harder. Anyway, yeah, Maxthon's still cool! Didn't know it was still around!<br />
<br />
:'''Netscape Navigator'''<br />
:[Two different versions exist: one with Cueball talking and one with Megan with tentacle arms talking.]<br />
:Person: Netscape Navigator? Hey, the nineties called - drunk as usual. I hung up without saying anything. This is getting harder. Anyway - it's cool that you'e got netscape running.<br />
<br />
:'''Rockmelt'''<br />
:[Cueball running to laptop.]<br />
:I ran to Rockmelt to hide my face<br />
<br />
:[Cueball sitting at laptop.]<br />
:But Rockmelt cried out -<br />
<br />
:[Laptop shouting.]<br />
:NO HIDING PLACE<br />
<br />
:[zoom out.]<br />
:NO HIDING PLACE DOWN HERE<br />
<br />
:'''Google Chrome-3'''<br />
:[A chrome plugin error page.]<br />
:Chrome: There does not exist --nor could there '''ever''' exist-- a plugin capable of displaying this content.<br />
<br />
:'''Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google - Chrome'''<br />
:[Chrome error page.]<br />
:Chrome: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon/The Times/Google is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.<br />
<br />
:'''Microsoft/Amazon - Firefox'''<br />
:[Firefox error page.]<br />
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/Amazon is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.<br />
<br />
:'''Microsoft/The Times'''<br />
:[Error page.]<br />
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, Microsoft/The Times is a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.<br />
<br />
:'''Corporate - Generic'''<br />
:[Error page.]<br />
:Error: This plugin requires clearance from the corporate press office in order to run. Remember, we work as a team; individual employees should ''never'' speak for the company without authorization.<br />
<br />
:'''Military'''<br />
:[Person looking at two browser windows.]<br />
:Cueball: I know y'all know what you're doing. But if you're on a military machine and you're supposed to be watching for missiles or something, I hope you're keeping an eye on that in the background while you're reading comics. Also: Thanks.<br />
<br />
:'''T-Mobile'''<br />
:[Error page.]<br />
:Data Error: T-Mobile was unable to establish a connection<br />
<br />
:'''Verizon'''<br />
:[Error page]<br />
:Error: You have exceeded your Verizon monthly bandwidth cap. Mobile web browsing has been disabled.<br />
<br />
:'''France'''<br />
:[Two people; one of which is browsing using a laptop.]<br />
:Cueball: Hey, you're French, right? Ever see what happens when you type "French Military Victories" into Google?<br />
:French person: Does it take you to an article on Napoleon?<br />
<br />
:French person: ..no? Strange, given how he kicked everyone's asses up and down Europe for over a decade.<br />
<br />
:[Beat frame.]<br />
<br />
:Cueball: Touche.<br />
:French person: You know, that'd sound smarter if you didn't pronounce it like it rhymes with "douche".<br />
<br />
:'''Germany'''<br />
:[Cueball dropping food from an unorthodox high perch.]<br />
:June 1948: In response to the Soviet blockade of East Germany, the western allies construct the Berlin Chairlift.<br />
:Cueball on chairlift: Food!<br />
<br />
:'''Israel'''<br />
:[Person on phone.]<br />
:Person (Translation from Hebrew): Mom, I met a great guy! But he's not Jewish. ...Wait, what do you mean "neither are we"? I'm completely confused.<br />
<br />
:'''Carnot Cycle'''<br />
:[Ponytail on a motorcycle with a heat-entropy graph on the side.]<br />
:Ponytail: Check out my new Carnot Cycle!<br />
:Cueball: Neat - how fast does it go?<br />
:Ponytail: Depends how cold it is outside.<br />
<br />
:'''Great Britain'''<br />
:[Illustration of the Atlantic ocean.]<br />
:American person: Sorry I don't have a comic poking fun at the UK here. I only had time to get to the most ''important'' US states.<br />
:British person: Hey - At least we have free health care and real ale.<br />
<br />
:'''Earthquake-Blizzard'''<br />
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]<br />
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.<br />
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!<br />
:Cueball: What!<br />
:Danish: You'll get it..<br />
<br />
:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]<br />
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!<br />
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.<br />
<br />
:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Boston", "Chicago", "Dallas", "Georgia", "Halifax", "Illinois", "Michigan", "Minnesota", "Missouri", "the Northeast", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", 'Pennsylvania", "Philadelphia", "Texas", "Toronto", "Tennessee", "New York", "Wisconsin"}! That was huge!<br />
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.<br />
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...<br />
<br />
:Six Months Later..<br />
:[Both people are trudging through a massive blizzard.]<br />
:Danish: In pictures, snow always looked so nice and sof - ''AAAA! MY NECK! How do people live here?!''<br />
:Cueball: Come on - it's only three more miles.<br />
<br />
:'''Earthquake-Tornado'''<br />
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]<br />
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.<br />
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!<br />
:Cueball: What!<br />
:Danish: You'll get it..<br />
<br />
:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]<br />
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!<br />
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.<br />
<br />
:Cueball: But this is {Options: "Alabama", "Dallas", "Illinois", "The Midwest", "Missouri", "Ohio", "Oklahoma", "Ottawa", "Tennessee", "Texas"}!<br />
:Cueball: That was huge!<br />
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.<br />
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...<br />
<br />
:Six Months Later..<br />
:[Both people are in a shelter in a prairie with a rapidly-approaching tornado.]<br />
:Danish: AAAA CLOSE THE SHELTER DOOR!<br />
:Cueball: Say the magic words...<br />
:Danish: THIS PLACE IS THE WORST!<br />
:Cueball: Thank you.<br />
<br />
:'''Earthquake-Hurricane'''<br />
:[Two people sitting at a desk, facing each other. The desk rattles.]<br />
:Cueball: Stop jiggling your leg.<br />
:Danish: I'm not ji-.. oh!<br />
:Cueball: What!<br />
:Danish: You'll get it..<br />
<br />
:[EVERYTHING RUMBLES.]<br />
:Cueball: ..HOLY CRAP IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!<br />
:Danish: Just a little one. Happens all the time back in San Francisco.<br />
<br />
:Cueball: But this is {Options: "D.C", "Florida", "Houston", "Miami", "New Jersey", "North Carolina", "South Carolina", "Virgina"}! That was huge!<br />
:Cueball: That was huge!<br />
:Danish: Seriously? That's the worst this place can do? Wow. I guess we grow up tougher in California.<br />
:Cueball: Oh ''really''...<br />
<br />
:Six Months Later..<br />
<br />
:[Both are in the middle of a hurricane. Danish is grabbing onto a signpost to avoid being swept away.]<br />
:Danish: AAAAA WHAT THE SHIIIIT!<br />
:Cueball: Calm down - this is barely a category 2.<br />
<br />
:'''Lake Diver Killer'''<br />
:[TV Field Reporter in front of a cordoned-off lake.]<br />
:Reporter: Police divers searching the bay say they have recovered the body of another victim of the "Lake Diver Killer."<br />
:Reporter: During the search, three more divers were reported missing.<br />
<br />
:'''Washington'''<br />
:[The statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial.]<br />
:In this Marble Prison As in the nightmares of the nation they tried to devour<br />
:The nanobots that constituted Abraham Lincoln<br />
:Are entombed forever.<br />
<br />
:'''Alaska'''<br />
:[A person with a gun chasing a helicopter on the back of a wolf in a snowy Alaskan field.]<br />
:Some people hunt wolves from helicopters. I hunt helicopters from a wolf.<br />
<br />
:'''Life in lab'''<br />
:[Newspaper headline.]<br />
:Scientists/UMass Amherst students/RIT students create life in lab<br />
:[Caption under picture of scientists.]<br />
:"The trick was fuckin'"<br />
<br />
:'''American Revolution'''<br />
:Robot Paul Revere: Remember: Zero if by land, One if by sea.<br />
<br />
:'''MIT'''<br />
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]<br />
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.<br />
:Hairy: We'll be rich!<br />
<br />
:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]<br />
<br />
:[The gears turn..]<br />
<br />
:Student: Five. There are five cards.<br />
:Cueball: I see their admission standards have been slipping.<br />
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.<br />
<br />
:'''MIT Course 15c'''<br />
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]<br />
:Cueball: I've hired a team of MIT students to count cards for us.<br />
:Hairy: We'll be rich!<br />
<br />
:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]<br />
<br />
:[The gears turn..]<br />
<br />
:Student: Five. There are five cards.<br />
:Cueball: I *knew* we shouldn't have picked course 15s.<br />
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.<br />
<br />
:'''Smith/Wellesley'''<br />
:[Two people in front of a group of students.]<br />
:Cueball: I've hired a team of Smith/Wellesley students to count cards for us.<br />
:Hairy: We'll be rich!<br />
<br />
:[Hairy deals some cards while the students watch.]<br />
<br />
:[The gears turn..]<br />
<br />
:Student: Five. There are five cards.<br />
:Cueball: We should've gone with Wellesley/Smith.<br />
:Hairy: Yeah - there are actually four.<br />
<br />
:'''CNU'''<br />
:[Person unsuspectingly strolls under a giant box trap controlled by a Trible.]<br />
:I worry that CNU only invited me back as a ruse because they realized I never turned in my final paper and want my diploma back. But if it turns out it's for real, I'll see you Wednesday at the Ferguson!<br />
<br />
:'''Dana Farber'''<br />
:[Cueball, pointing towards head.]<br />
:Cueball: Check it out - In support of people going through chemo, I shaved my head.<br />
:Lots of love to everyone reading this at Dana Farber. Cancer sucks. If you are new to DCFI, there's a great little garden on the third floor of the yawkey if you need somewhere quiet to just sit for a little bit and breathe.<br />
<br />
:'''Reviews'''<br />
:Shopping before online reviews:<br />
:[Cueball and Megan stand in a store. Cueball points at a lamp on the table in front of him. There is another lamp on the table behind them.]<br />
:Cueball: This lamp is pretty.<br />
:Megan: And affordable.<br />
:Cueball: Let's get it.<br />
:Megan Ok! <br />
<br />
:Shopping now:<br />
:[Cueball points at a lamp on the table in front of him. Megan looks at her phone.]<br />
:Cueball: This lamp is pretty.<br />
:Megan: It's got 1 1/2 stars on Amazon. Reviews all say to avoid that brand.<br />
<br />
:[Cueball and Megan are now both looking at their phones.]<br />
:Cueball: This one has good reviews.<br />
:Megan: Wait, one guy says when he plugged it in, he got a metallic taste in his mouth and his cats went deaf.<br />
:Cueball: Eek. What about- ...no, review points out it resembles a uterus.<br />
<br />
:[Cueball is still looking at his phone, Megan has hers at her side.]<br />
:Cueball: Ok, I found a Swiss lampmaker with perfect reviews. Her lamps start at 1,300 Francs and she's only reachable by ski lift.<br />
:Megan: You know, our room looks fine in the dark.<br />
<br />
==Trivia==<br />
*Reddit user [http://www.reddit.com/user/SomePostMan SomePostMan] created a [http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/t6wmh/all_umwelt_1037_comics_in_two_imgur_albums/ post] that collected all of the Umwelt comics and added explanations. Much of his information is now included in this wiki.<br />
<br />
*The transcript section for this comic also included a note alluding to its extreme length:<br />
: [ [Two people...] ] ((..wait.. <scrolls through a listing of everything> oh goddammit Randall. Thanks a bunch, dude. I better get a raise for typing out all this)) <br />
: [Two people standing next to each other. One is holding the head end of a snake...<br />
<br />
{{comic discussion}}<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Danish]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]<br />
[[Category:Comics with color]]<br />
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]<br />
[[Category:Philosophy]]<br />
[[Category:Penis]]<br />
[[Category:Video games]]<br />
[[Category:Velociraptors]]<br />
[[Category:April fools' comics]]<br />
[[Category:Your Mom]]<br />
[[Category:Puns]]</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:1730:_Starshade&diff=126338Talk:1730: Starshade2016-09-07T17:08:39Z<p>108.162.245.120: </p>
<hr />
<div><!--Please sign your posts with ~~~~--><br />
<br />
I would like to note that in the last frame the microphone booms on the headsets are on the right side, rather than on the left, which would have been more common. [http://ux.stackexchange.com/questions/60749/why-most-of-the-microphones-are-placed-on-the-left-of-headsets-headphones Stackexchange discussion]<br />
:Wauw that is not important here ;-) --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 12:24, 7 September 2016 (UTC)<br />
<br />
Is this comic sexist? [[Special:Contributions/198.41.239.34|198.41.239.34]] 10:28, 7 September 2016 (UTC)<br />
:Umh, NO!? --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 12:24, 7 September 2016 (UTC)<br />
::It passes the Bechdel Test, for whatever that's worth. Two women talking about astronomy!<br />
<br />
Does "kickstart" refer to {{w|Kickstarter}}? --[[User:JakubNarebski|JakubNarebski]] ([[User talk:JakubNarebski|talk]]) 14:15, 7 September 2016 (UTC)<br />
<br />
: Pretty clearly, but it might be good to make that explicit, and point out that either there is no such [https://www.kickstarter.com/signup?context=new_project&then=%2Fprojects%2Fnew%3Futf8%3D%25E2%259C%2593%26project%255Bcategory_id%255D%3D16%26project%255Bname%255D%3DWebb%2BStarshade%26project%255Bcountry%255D%3DUS%26commit%3DSave%2Band%2Bcontinue Kickstarter] project yet, or (less likely) link to the project.<br />
: โ[[User:FlashSheridan|FlashSheridan]] ([[User talk:FlashSheridan|talk]]) 14:59, 7 September 2016 (UTC)<br />
<br />
May be related to 975: Occulting Telescope (https://xkcd.com/975/). <br />
[[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.120|108.162.245.120]] 17:08, 7 September 2016 (UTC)</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=327:_Exploits_of_a_Mom&diff=125913327: Exploits of a Mom2016-08-30T02:53:26Z<p>108.162.245.120: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{comic<br />
| number = 327<br />
| date = October 10, 2007<br />
| title = Exploits of a Mom<br />
| image = exploits_of_a_mom.png<br />
| titletext = Her daughter is named Help I'm trapped in a driver's license factory.<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Explanation==<br />
[[Mrs. Roberts]] receives a call from her son's school. The caller, likely one of the school's administrators, asks if she really named her son <code>[[Robert'); DROP TABLE students;--]]</code>, a rather unusual name. Perhaps surprisingly, Mrs. Roberts responds in the affirmative, claiming that she uses the nickname "Little Bobby Tables". As the full name is read into the school's system's databases without {{w|Data sanitization#SQL injection|data sanitization}}, it causes the student table in the database to be deleted.<br />
<br />
The title of this comic is a punโ''exploit'' can mean an accomplishment or heroic deed, but in computer science the term refers to a program or technique that takes advantage of a vulnerability in other software. In fact, one could say that her exploit is to exploit an exploit (her achievement is to make use of a vulnerability). The title can also refer to her choice of name for her son, which is rather extraordinary.<br />
<br />
<br />
In {{w|SQL}}, a database programming language, commands are separated by semicolons <code>;</code> and strings of text are often delimited using single quotes <code>'</code>. Parts of commands may also be enclosed in parentheses <code>(</code> and <code>)</code>. Data entries are stored as "rows" within named "tables" of similar items (e.g. <code>Students</code>). The command to delete an entire table (and every row of data in that table) is <code>DROP TABLE</code>, as in <code>DROP TABLE Students;</code>.<br />
<br />
The exploited vulnerability here is that the single quote in the name input was not correctly "escaped" by the software. That is, if a student's name did indeed contain a quote mark, it should have been parsed as one of the characters making up the text string and not as the marker to close the string, which it erroneously was. Lack of such escaping is a common SQL vulnerability; this type of exploit is referred to as {{w|SQL injection}}. Mrs. Roberts thus reminds the school to make sure they have added data filtering code to prevent code injection exploits in the future.<br />
<br />
<br />
For example, to add information about Elaine to a data table called 'Students' the SQL query could be:<br />
<br />
<code>INSERT INTO Students (firstname) VALUES ('Elaine');</code><br />
<br />
<br />
However, using the odd name <code>Robert');DROP TABLE Students;--&nbsp;</code> where we used "Elaine" above, the SQL query becomes:<br />
<br />
<code>INSERT INTO Students (firstname) VALUES ('Robert');DROP TABLE Students;--&nbsp;');</code><br />
<br />
<br />
By insertion of the two semi-colons in the odd name this is now three well formed SQL commands:<br />
<br />
<code><br />
INSERT INTO Students (firstname) VALUES ('Robert');<br />
<br />
DROP TABLE Students;<br />
<br />
--&nbsp;');<br />
</code><br />
<br />
<br />
The first line is valid SQL code that will legitimately insert data on a Student called Robert.<br />
<br />
The second line is valid injected SQL code that will delete the whole Student data table from the database.<br />
<br />
The third line is a valid code comment ( --&nbsp; denotes a comment) which will be ignored by the SQL server.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
For this to work, it helps to know a little about the structure of the database. But it's quite a good guess that a school's student management database might have a table named <code>Students</code>. <br />
<br />
Of course, in real life most exploits of this kind would be performed not by socially engineering a person's name such that it would eventually be entered into a school database query, but rather by accessing some kind of input system (such as a website's login screen or search interface) and guessing various combinations by trial and error until something works, perhaps by first trying to inject the <code>SHOW TABLES</code> command to see how the database is structured.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
To correctly and harmlessly include the odd name in the Students table in the school database the correct SQL is:<br />
<br />
<code>INSERT INTO Students (firstname) VALUES ('Robert\');DROP TABLE Students;--&nbsp;');</code><br />
<br />
Note that the single quote after Robert is now sanitized by a backslash, which changes it from malicious code to harmless data.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
It should be noted that while data sanitization can mitigate the risks of SQL injection, the proper prevention technique is to use {{w|Prepared statement}}s.<br />
<br />
==Daughter's name==<br />
The XKCD title text references that Mom's daughter is named "Help I'm trapped in a driver's license factory". This is a play on how if someone is stuck and forced to work in a manufacturing factory/plant then they will write on the product "Help I am trapped in a ____ factory" in order to tell people on the outside. Having this name would cause any police officer that pulls her over to show some concern, as well as getting the license in the first place would be difficult. The idea of inserting a help message like this was already used in [[10: Pi Equals]].<br />
<!-- Help! I'm being held prisoner in a Wiki markup code editing facility! --><br />
<br />
This xkcd comic has become rather famous, spawning at least one site about preventing SQL injection named http://bobby-tables.com. Noted security expert {{w|Bruce Schneier}} (who often quotes xkcd) [https://www.schneier.com/blog/archives/2010/10/pen-and-paper_s.html mentioned a similar attack] which happened in the 2014 Swedish general elections.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
:[Mrs. Roberts receives a call from her son's school.]<br />
:Caller: Hi, This is your son's school. We're having some computer trouble.<br />
<br />
:Mrs. Roberts: Oh, dear - did he break something?<br />
:Caller: In a way -<br />
<br />
:Caller: Did you really name your son <code>Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--</code> ?<br />
:Mrs. Roberts: Oh, yes. Little Bobby Tables, we call him.<br />
<br />
:Caller: Well, we've lost this year's student records. I hope you're happy.<br />
:Mrs. Roberts: And I hope you've learned to sanitize your database inputs.<br />
<br />
{{comic discussion}}<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Mrs. Roberts]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Little Bobby Tables]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Elaine Roberts]]<br />
[[Category:Comics featuring Miss Lenhart]]</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1718:_Backups&diff=1250601718: Backups2016-08-10T17:05:21Z<p>108.162.245.120: /* Explanation */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{comic<br />
| number = 1718<br />
| date = August 10, 2016<br />
| title = Backups<br />
| image = backups.png<br />
| titletext = Maybe you should keep FEWER backups; it sounds like throwing away everything you've done and starting from scratch might not be the worst idea.<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Explanation==<br />
Here, Cueball is depicted on his laptop, exploring a cyclic path along which his files are being copied from storage to storage. His laptop (presumably the one he is on) is sending its files to a server, which sends its files to ''another'' server, which in turn syncs back to his laptop. Cueball determines that this setup leads to an exponential growth, implying that each node in the cycle simply copies files over to the next without any effort to avoid duplicates. Indeed, each time a set of files completes a full cycle, a duplicate copy of the same files will be created, thus doubling the amount of storage space required.<br />
<br />
Cueball, who was rather alarmed, calms down when he realizes that ''this'' exponential growth is slower than that of Moore's Law. He reasons that as long as he keeps at the forefront of information storage, he will never run out of room. {{w|Moore's Law}} is an observation in computer science that states that the number of transistors we can fit in a chip will double approximately every two years. Assuming available disk capacity is proportional to number of transistors (this is true for solid-state disks), this would imply it takes more than two years for his files to completely propagate through two servers and back to his laptop, which is extremely slow compared to typical backup systems.<br />
<br />
The phrase "[this is] why we can't have nice things" is often used in response to incidents where someone abuses a well-meaning feature, with the abuse ultimately wiping out any benefits the feature was supposed to bring. In the comic, the person off-screen is commenting on the fact that Cueball is not using advances in storage capacity in a responsible manner. That is, rather than using the increased capacity to store more useful information, he is simply using it as a workaround to avoid having to make his backup strategy more efficient.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
[Cueball] is sitting at a desk, working on a laptop.<br />
:Cueball: Wait. My laptop is backing up some folders to this server...<br />
<br />
[Cueball scratches his chin in thought.]<br />
:Cueball: ...which is backing up its archives to ''that'' server...<br />
:Cueball: ...and ''that'' server is syncing certain folders over to my laptop...<br />
<br />
[Cueball clicks something on his laptop keyboard.]<br />
:Keyboard: Click click click<br />
<br />
[Cueball is back to working normally on his laptop. A voice speaks to him from offscreen.]<br />
:Cueball: ...but the exponential growth is slightly slower than Moore's law, so whatever.<br />
:Offscreen voice: Oh my God.<br />
:Offscreen voice: You are why we can't have nice things.<br />
<br />
{{comic discussion}}</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1718:_Backups&diff=1250591718: Backups2016-08-10T16:44:35Z<p>108.162.245.120: /* Explanation */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{comic<br />
| number = 1718<br />
| date = August 10, 2016<br />
| title = Backups<br />
| image = backups.png<br />
| titletext = Maybe you should keep FEWER backups; it sounds like throwing away everything you've done and starting from scratch might not be the worst idea.<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Explanation==<br />
Here, Cueball is depicted on his laptop, exploring a cyclic path along which his files are being copied from storage to storage. His laptop (presumably the one he is on) is sending its files to a server, which sends its files to ''another'' server, which in turn syncs back to his laptop. Cueball determines that this setup leads to an exponential growth, implying that each node in the cycle simply copies files over to the next without any effort to avoid duplicates. Indeed, each time a set of files completes a full cycle, a second copy of the same set will be created, thus doubling the amount of storage space required.<br />
<br />
Cueball, who was rather alarmed, calms down when he realizes that ''this'' exponential growth is slower than that of Moore's Law. He reasons that as long as he keeps at the forefront of information storage, he will never run out of room. {{w|Moore's Law}} is an observation in computer science that states that the number of transistors we can fit in a chip will double approximately every two years. Assuming available disk capacity is proportional to number of transistors (this is true for solid-state disks), this would imply it takes more than two years for his files to completely propagate through a full cycle, which is extremely slow considering it only involves copying between three computers.<br />
<br />
The phrase "[this is] why we can't have nice things" is often used in response to incidents where someone abuses a feature meant to benefit people and ultimately causing the feature to break down. In the comic, the person off-screen is commenting on the fact that Cueball is not using advances in storage capacity in a responsible manner. That is, rather than using the increased capacity to store more useful information, he is simply using it as a workaround to avoid having to make his backup strategy more efficient.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
[Cueball] is sitting at a desk, working on a laptop.<br />
:Cueball: Wait. My laptop is backing up some folders to this server...<br />
<br />
[Cueball scratches his chin in thought.]<br />
:Cueball: ...which is backing up its archives to ''that'' server...<br />
:Cueball: ...and ''that'' server is syncing certain folders over to my laptop...<br />
<br />
[Cueball clicks something on his laptop keyboard.]<br />
:Keyboard: Click click click<br />
<br />
[Cueball is back to working normally on his laptop. A voice speaks to him from offscreen.]<br />
:Cueball: ...but the exponential growth is slightly slower than Moore's law, so whatever.<br />
:Offscreen voice: Oh my God.<br />
:Offscreen voice: You are why we can't have nice things.<br />
<br />
{{comic discussion}}</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1717:_Pyramid_Honey&diff=1249441717: Pyramid Honey2016-08-08T17:22:23Z<p>108.162.245.120: /* Explanation */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{comic<br />
| number = 1717<br />
| date = August 8, 2016<br />
| title = Pyramid Honey<br />
| image = pyramid_honey.png<br />
| titletext = They CLAIM honey was found in the chambers under the pyramids, but this conspiracy goes all the way to the TOP, where the GIANT EYE is!<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Explanation==<br />
Bee honey is a food item with natural antimicrobial properties. It can remain unspoiled for a person's entire lifetime, making it practically nonperishable for ordinary consumers. It is frequently claimed that archaeologists have found jars of honey that have been well-preserved for thousands of years in ancient tombs. The claims are generally assertions which may point to other similar assertions as supporting evidence but do not provide specific details, such as the identify of the actual tombs where such jars have been found, nor the names of the archaeologists who have affirmed finding such jars. The commonality of the assertion, however, leads some people to claim that honey's shelf life is "infinite", which is a much stronger claim which would not be supported by the assertion even if it is shown to be factual.<br />
<br />
In the comic, Cueball tells Megan about an article on ''Smithsonian Magazine'' (presumably [http://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-science-behind-honeys-eternal-shelf-life-1218690/ this one]) that claims honey has an infinite shelf life. The article links to a book which makes the assertion of such findings but does not provide factual support of the findings. Megan thinks the sources of the article are wrong and wants to refute it. Black Hat, upon hearing Megan's claim that the Smithsonian Magazine's source is wrong, immediately decides to spread it on the Internet without giving Megan a chance explain any further.<br />
<br />
Black Hat's actions are clearly premature, since he has not heard any evidence to back up the claim and does not understand the nuances of Megan's position. Presumably, the best he can do would be to parrot what he has heard from Megan, without any understanding or critical thinking on his part. Due to his lack of understanding, he may even interject his own ideas (ones Megan never believed nor stated) into his posts. These are all consistent with he calling himself "pyramid honey truther". The word ''truther'' refers to people who reject established facts and instead choose to believe in conspiracies, like people who claim the moon landing never happened or people who believe the US government is behind the 9/11 attacks. This turns Megan, who likely has a reasonable and well-justified position, unwillingly into the source of conspiracy theories.<br />
<br />
The alt-text refers to the {{w|Eye of Providence}}, a symbol of an eye at the top of a pyramid, found on US currency.<br />
<br />
This comic is likely a satire of the stereotypical internet mindset, and plays up the frequent confusion between legitimate scientific scepticism, where unsupported claims are rejected, and conspiracy-theory faux-scepticism, where legitimate evidence is rejected because it does not support a specific viewpoint.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
:[Cueball and Megan are talking]<br />
:Cuball: Apparently honey has an infinite shelf life. They just found jars of it in the pyramids, still good.<br />
:Megan: You know, I've heard that, and I don't think its true.<br />
<br />
<br />
:[Black hat enters]<br />
:Cueball: Really? Smithsonian magazine confirmed it.<br />
:Megan: Believe it or not, I think their source is wrong.<br />
:Black Hat: '''''I believe you.'''''<br />
<br />
:Megan: See I read about the archeologists who-<br />
:Black Hat: I'm convinced. Gonna go to tell the internet.<br />
<br />
:Megan: Wait, are you sure? Let me explain why-<br />
:Black Hat: Don't need it. I've heard enough.<br />
<br />
:Black Hat: I've been looking for a weird hill to die on, and all the real ones are to far from my house. So this is mine. I'm now a pyramid honey truther.<br />
<br />
:Black hat: Time to start a Facebook group and post a bunch of all-caps comments everywhere.<br />
:Cueball: This could have gone better.<br />
:Megan: Oh well.<br />
<br />
:Alt-text: They CLAIM honey was found in the chambers under the pyramids, but this conspiracy goes all the way to the TOP, where the GIANT EYE is!<br />
<br />
{{comic discussion}}</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:1032:_Networking&diff=53459Talk:1032: Networking2013-11-22T21:20:52Z<p>108.162.245.120: minor - added spacing between comments</p>
<hr />
<div>I don't think "Connr" is a typo, as it's very likely the type of thing that a Web 2.0 business owner would do (see, for instance, the businesses Flickr, Tumblr, etc). [[User:Blaisepascal|Blaisepascal]] ([[User talk:Blaisepascal|talk]]) 17:56, 16 August 2012 (UTC)<br />
: That makes a lot of sense. I probably should have edited out the parenthetical when I copied/pasted from the blog. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]] ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 20:47, 16 August 2012 (UTC)<br />
''All of these things are not common behavior.''<br />
I don't know why, but that line of the explanation got me laughing for a full minute. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.66|108.162.215.66]] 06:20, 22 November 2013 (UTC)<br />
<br />
Another example of a "long tail" business is a luxury car maker like Lambourghini. While their parent companies (Audi and Volkswagen) target wider audiences, Lambourghini intentionally focuses on the very high-end luxury market, pricing their vehicles around $400,000 each. Their highest sales year on record was 2008, when they delivered a worldwide total of 2,430 new cars. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.120|108.162.245.120]] 21:20, 22 November 2013 (UTC)</div>108.162.245.120https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:1032:_Networking&diff=53458Talk:1032: Networking2013-11-22T21:20:12Z<p>108.162.245.120: Long-tail business - Lambourghini</p>
<hr />
<div>I don't think "Connr" is a typo, as it's very likely the type of thing that a Web 2.0 business owner would do (see, for instance, the businesses Flickr, Tumblr, etc). [[User:Blaisepascal|Blaisepascal]] ([[User talk:Blaisepascal|talk]]) 17:56, 16 August 2012 (UTC)<br />
: That makes a lot of sense. I probably should have edited out the parenthetical when I copied/pasted from the blog. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]] ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 20:47, 16 August 2012 (UTC)<br />
''All of these things are not common behavior.''<br />
I don't know why, but that line of the explanation got me laughing for a full minute. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.66|108.162.215.66]] 06:20, 22 November 2013 (UTC)<br />
Another example of a "long tail" business is a luxury car maker like Lambourghini. While their parent companies (Audi and Volkswagen) target wider audiences, Lambourghini intentionally focuses on the very high-end luxury market, pricing their vehicles around $400,000 each. Their highest sales year on record was 2008, when they delivered a worldwide total of 2,430 new cars. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.120|108.162.245.120]] 21:20, 22 November 2013 (UTC)</div>108.162.245.120