1933: Santa Facts - Revision history

203.62.28.67: Added a bit about a citation needed in the active warrants section. If anyone knows how many intelligence agencies are building cases against Santa, please add your source to that section.

2026-05-11T23:30:56Z

Added a bit about a citation needed in the active warrants section. If anyone knows how many intelligence agencies are building cases against Santa, please add your source to that section.

203.62.28.66: Extended the active warrants section

2026-05-11T23:27:08Z

Extended the active warrants section

203.7.126.7: Changed it to make it more accurate

2026-05-11T22:25:41Z

Changed it to make it more accurate

82.132.217.183: /* Explanation */ Neither the original suggestion nor the most recent change were SecAg at the time of publication, it seems. Futureproofed it against temptation to substitute any subsequent incumbants, for whom the comic also was not drawn.

2025-09-30T15:17:37Z

‎Explanation: Neither the original suggestion nor the most recent change were SecAg at the time of publication, it seems. Futureproofed it against temptation to substitute any subsequent incumbants, for whom the comic also was not drawn.

KelOfTheStars!: Fixed inconsistency with Brooke Rollins’ name

2025-09-30T00:49:31Z

Fixed inconsistency with Brooke Rollins’ name

SMGmsgsgd: /* Explanation */

2025-09-01T13:35:00Z

‎Explanation

SMGmsgsgd: /* Explanation */

2025-09-01T13:23:36Z

‎Explanation

172.69.67.23: Updated secretary of agriculture

2025-04-05T18:57:18Z

Updated secretary of agriculture

162.158.179.5 at 03:03, 22 February 2025

2025-02-22T03:03:28Z

TheusafBOT: Reverted edit 358084 by 172.71.218.182 to 355636

2024-11-28T04:10:28Z

Reverted edit 358084 by 172.71.218.182 to 355636

@@ Line 21: / Line 21: @@
 '''Active warrants: 5'''
-:There is an active warrant for Santa's arrest in 5 jurisdictions, presumably for breaking and entering or for operating a flying sleigh without the proper licensing, while drunk, or over the speed limit. Considering Santa acts all over the world, there would likely be much more than five active warrants. This may reference how hard it is for intelligence agencies to collect evidence to use against Santa.
+:There is an active warrant for Santa's arrest in 5 jurisdictions, presumably for breaking and entering or for operating a flying sleigh without the proper licensing, while drunk, or over the speed limit. Considering Santa acts all over the world, he has likely broken laws in more than 5 jurisdictions.{{Citation needed}} This may reference how hard it is for intelligence agencies to collect evidence to use against Santa.
 '''Lubricated for easy passage down chimneys'''

@@ Line 21: / Line 21: @@
 '''Active warrants: 5'''
-:There is an active warrant for Santa's arrest in 5 jurisdictions, presumably for breaking and entering or for operating a flying sleigh without the proper licensing, while drunk, or over the speed limit.
+:There is an active warrant for Santa's arrest in 5 jurisdictions, presumably for breaking and entering or for operating a flying sleigh without the proper licensing, while drunk, or over the speed limit. Considering Santa acts all over the world, there would likely be much more than five active warrants. This may reference how hard it is for intelligence agencies to collect evidence to use against Santa.
 '''Lubricated for easy passage down chimneys'''

@@ Line 15: / Line 15: @@
 '''Type: Flying/Psychic'''
-:A reference to {{w|Pokémon}}. The {{w|Gameplay_of_Pokémon#Pok%C3%A9mon_types|type}} of a Pokémon describes and determines its abilities (including attacks), affinities, and general nature. In most stories Santa Claus rides a sled pulled by flying reindeer (all other [https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Flying_(type) Flying-type] Pokémon fly under their own power) and some kind of magical power. Psychic possibly refers to his ability to know a child's activities and behavior, including when they are {{w|Santa_Claus_Is_Comin%27_to_Town| sleeping or awake}}, implying a psychic ability to read minds. There is a Pokémon based on Santa, [https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Delibird_(Pok%C3%A9mon) Delibird], although it is Ice/Flying instead of Flying/Psychic.
+:A reference to {{w|Pokémon}}. The {{w|Gameplay_of_Pokémon#Pok%C3%A9mon_types|type}} of a Pokémon describes and determines its abilities (including attacks), affinities, and general nature. In most stories Santa Claus rides a sled pulled by flying reindeer (besides a few special exceptions, [https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Flying_(type) Flying-type] Pokémon all have wings) and some kind of magical power. Psychic possibly refers to his ability to know a child's activities and behavior, including when they are {{w|Santa_Claus_Is_Comin%27_to_Town| sleeping or awake}}, implying a psychic ability to read minds. There is a Pokémon based on Santa, [https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Delibird_(Pok%C3%A9mon) Delibird], although it is Ice/Flying instead of Flying/Psychic.
 '''Plural: "Santa"'''

@@ Line 39: / Line 39: @@
 :The {{w|United_States_presidential_line_of_succession|Presidential Line of Succession}} specifies the order in which persons may become or act as {{w|President of the United States}} if the incumbent President becomes incapacitated, dies, resigns, or is removed from office. Having Santa as the 9th in that order would place him above the {{w|United States Secretary of Agriculture|Secretary of Agriculture}}. An alternative interpretation would hold that Santa '''is''' the present Secretary of Agriculture, {{w|Brooke Rollins}}.
-:Assuming Brooke Rollins is not Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency, as most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of Turkey) rather than the United States.  Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.
+:Assuming {{w|Sonny Perdue}} (the Secretary of Agriculture, at the time of the comic) was not also Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency. Most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of modern day Turkey) rather than the United States. Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.
 :Alternatively, Santa Clause is in North Pole Presidential Line of Succession - indicating, that there's at least 9 people more high-ranking in New Year hierarchy than Santa Claus himself. As such, it's likely that there are many Santa Clauses - though it's unclear if people in succession line are other Santas, or are [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Claus#Related_figures regional equivalents of Santa (e.g. Ded Moroz, Father Christmas, Joulupukki, Sinterklaas, etc)]. This is likely reason why "Plural" is explicitly written in.

@@ Line 39: / Line 39: @@
 :The {{w|United_States_presidential_line_of_succession|Presidential Line of Succession}} specifies the order in which persons may become or act as {{w|President of the United States}} if the incumbent President becomes incapacitated, dies, resigns, or is removed from office. Having Santa as the 9th in that order would place him above the {{w|United States Secretary of Agriculture|Secretary of Agriculture}}. An alternative interpretation would hold that Santa '''is''' the present Secretary of Agriculture, {{w|Brooke Rollins}}.
-:Assuming Tom Vilsack is not Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency, as most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of Turkey) rather than the United States.  Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.
+:Assuming Brooke Rollins is not Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency, as most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of Turkey) rather than the United States.  Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.
 :Alternatively, Santa Clause is in North Pole Presidential Line of Succession - indicating, that there's at least 9 people more high-ranking in New Year hierarchy than Santa Claus himself. As such, it's likely that there are many Santa Clauses - though it's unclear if people in succession line are other Santas, or are [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Claus#Related_figures regional equivalents of Santa (e.g. Ded Moroz, Father Christmas, Joulupukki, Sinterklaas, etc)]. This is likely reason why "Plural" is explicitly written in.

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:35, 1 September 2025
Line 40:		Line 40:

	:Assuming Tom Vilsack is not Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency, as most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of Turkey) rather than the United States. Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.		:Assuming Tom Vilsack is not Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency, as most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of Turkey) rather than the United States. Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.
		+
		+	:Alternatively, Santa Clause is in North Pole Presidential Line of Succession - indicating, that there's at least 9 people more high-ranking in New Year hierarchy than Santa Claus himself. As such, it's likely that there are many Santa Clauses - though it's unclear if people in succession line are other Santas, or are [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Claus#Related_figures regional equivalents of Santa (e.g. Ded Moroz, Father Christmas, Joulupukki, Sinterklaas, etc)]. This is likely reason why "Plural" is explicitly written in.

	'''Not technically an insect — actually an arthropod'''		'''Not technically an insect — actually an arthropod'''

@@ Line 27: / Line 27: @@
 '''Vertical Leap: 14 Miles'''
-:For a non-magical being or object, a vertical leap of 14 miles (~23 km), ''ignoring air resistance'' would require an initial launch velocity of slightly more than 2180 feet per second (665 m/s), somewhat over twice the speed of sound. Achieving this velocity by means of bending then straightening the legs would require an acceleration of roughly 25,000 G, placing extraordinarily high demands on the strength of the legs. As Santa does not have a particularly aerodynamic shape, air resistance would increase the launch velocity and launch acceleration requirements substantially. Santa may be able to overcome these problems due to his magical nature; however, there is clearly still a limit to what this can achieve, as there is a maximum to his leaping ability.
+:For a non-magical being or object, a vertical leap of 14 miles (~23 km), ''ignoring air resistance'' would require an initial launch velocity of slightly more than 2180 feet per second (665 m/s), somewhat over twice the speed of sound. Achieving this velocity by means of bending then straightening the legs would require an acceleration of roughly 25,000 G, placing extraordinarily high demands on the strength and durability of the legs. As Santa does not have a particularly aerodynamic shape, air resistance would increase the launch velocity and launch acceleration requirements substantially. Santa may be able to overcome these problems due to his magical nature; however, there is clearly still a limit to what this can achieve, as there is a maximum to his leaping ability.
 '''Sleigh Flag of Convenience: Panama'''

@@ Line 37: / Line 37: @@
 '''9th in Presidential Line of Succession'''
-:The {{w|United_States_presidential_line_of_succession|Presidential Line of Succession}} specifies the order in which persons may become or act as {{w|President of the United States}} if the incumbent President becomes incapacitated, dies, resigns, or is removed from office. Having Santa as the 9th in that order would place him above the {{w|United States Secretary of Agriculture|Secretary of Agriculture}}. An alternative interpretation would hold that Santa '''is''' the present Secretary of Agriculture, {{w|Tom Vilsack}}.
+:The {{w|United_States_presidential_line_of_succession|Presidential Line of Succession}} specifies the order in which persons may become or act as {{w|President of the United States}} if the incumbent President becomes incapacitated, dies, resigns, or is removed from office. Having Santa as the 9th in that order would place him above the {{w|United States Secretary of Agriculture|Secretary of Agriculture}}. An alternative interpretation would hold that Santa '''is''' the present Secretary of Agriculture, {{w|Brooke Rollins}}.
 :Assuming Tom Vilsack is not Santa Claus, Santa is likely ineligible for the Presidency, as most origin stories of Santa have him a natural-born citizen of a European country (or of Turkey) rather than the United States.  Alternately, Santa might be old enough to qualify under the "citizen at the time of the adoption of this constitution" clause, although in light of the information that Santa is actually an arthropod and/or a vampire (see below), his status as an American citizen is dubious.

← Older revision		Revision as of 03:03, 22 February 2025
Line 96:		Line 96:
	[[Category:Facts]]		[[Category:Facts]]
	[[Category:Animals]]		[[Category:Animals]]
		+	[[Category:Pokémon]]

@@ Line 3: / Line 3: @@
 | date      = December 25, 2017
 | title     = Santa Facts
-| image     = checkmark.png
+| image     = santa_facts.png
 | titletext = We've gotten him up to 20% milk and cookies through an aggressive public campaign, but that seems to be his dietary limit. Anything above that and he starts developing nutritional deficiencies.
 }}