1011: Baby Names
Title text: I've been trying for a couple years now but I haven't been able to come up with a name dumber than 'Renesmee'.
This comic is a list of comically terrible baby names invented by Randall. It may relate to his other comics about why he shouldn't be allowed to have access to babies.
This is a list of the names with a short description:
- Ponzi - An Italian surname, most often associated with "Ponzi scheme".
- Eeemily - A corruption of "Emily". May also be a marketing plug for the Asus Eee brand.
- Fire Fire - Even a single "Fire" would be odd as a name, at least in the American dialects. It would also not be a good idea to call your child's name in a crowded place. This name could also be the inverse of "Ice Ice", a common joke baby name referencing Ice Ice Baby.
- Chipotla - A frequent mispronounciation of chipotle chili or the popular Chipotle Mexican Grill restaurant chain. Many people would readily attempt to correct you when you called your child's name.
- Astamouthe - Could be pronounced "Ass to mouth".
- Eggsperm - A child is conceived by combining an egg and a sperm, this child's name is conceived by combining the names of the two things.
- [sound of record scratch] - This cannot be spelled or reliably pronounced. Likely a reference to any movie where a record scratch plays and the protagonist says "that's me".
- Parsley - Parsley is an herb and is not commonly used as a name unlike other herbs like Rosemary and Sage. It is, however, probably the least terrible name on this list.
- Hot'n'Juicy Ann - "Ann" is a normal name. Prefacing it with the sexual "Hot'n'Juicy" would not be appropriate for a child's name.
- Ovari - Female reproductive organ, misspelled.
- Friendly - Odd enough on its own, but when referring to her possessions it would create confusion with the restaurant Friendly's. Can also be humorous in introductions - "Hi I'm Friendly and I hate you."
- Sean (pronounced "seen") - While this isn't an incorrect pronunciation, the more common pronunciation would be "Shawn". Very likely a reference to the name of the actor Sean Bean (whose name is pronounced Shawn Been), which uses the exact same pairing of letters for two pronunciations.
- Joyst - Corruption of "Joyce". May also refer to the term "joist", which is a beam used in construction to support ceilings or floors, or the first part of the word "joystick", a video game controller.
Renesmee (from the title text) is the name of Renesmee Cullen, who is the baby born in the book and movie Breaking Dawn to parents Edward and Bella. Edward and Bella get "Renesmee" from an amalgamation of the names of Bella's mother, Renée, and Edward's adoptive mother, Esme. Randall's point is that all those names are terrible, but (arguably) not nearly as terrible as the name Renesmee.
- [Cueball sits at a desk, thinking with his hand on his chin, his other hand holding a pen over a piece of paper. Megan stands behind him, looking over his shoulder, also with her hand on her chin.]
- [Above the drawing is the list they are writing by hand.]
- Names for daughter
- Fire Fire
- [sound of record scratch]
- Hot'n'Juicy Ann
- Sean (pronounced "seen")
- Eemili is a real Finnish (man's) name, cognate to Aemilius/Emil in other European languages.
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