Difference between revisions of "1843: Opening Crawl"

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
Jump to: navigation, search
(Reverted vandalism with User:CRLF/OneClickUndo.js)
(Reverted edit by anti-crap user)
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{{comic
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crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap 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| number    = 1843
 
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| date      = May 29, 2017
 
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| title    = Opening Crawl
 
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| image    = opening_crawl.png
 
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| titletext = Using a classic Timothy Zahn EU/Legends novel is bad enough, but at least the style and setting aren't too far off. If you really want to mess with people, try using Splinter of the Mind's Eye.
 
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}}
 
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==Explanation==
 
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Each <span style="border-bottom:1px dotted" title="thus excluding spin-offs like Rogue One">episodic</span> ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' film begins with an "{{tvtropes|OpeningScroll|opening crawl}}" giving the audience some of the backstory, which often reads like the prologue of a novel. 
 
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[[Randall]] wants to reverse this by projecting the text of a Star Wars novel and see how long this can be continued before viewers realize it is a prank. The text in the opening scroll is actually from the beginning of the final book of the Thrawn Trilogy by Timothy Zahn.
 
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The title text compares different Star Wars novels' style, remarking on how well suited they would be for this prank.
 
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{{w|Timothy Zahn}} is a science fiction writer who has written and contributed to [http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Timothy_Zahn#Works many novels and comics] in the {{w|Star Wars expanded universe}}. The [http://www.mustreading.net/Thrawn_Trilogy_03.html text in the comic] is the first five paragraphs from the book ''[http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/The_Last_Command The Last Command]''. The characters mentioned are [http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Mitth%27raw%27nuruodo Grand Admiral Thrawn], the primary antagonist of the ''Thrawn Trilogy'', and [http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Pellaeon Gilad Pellaeon], who serves as a {{w|Dr. Watson}}-type companion to Thrawn throughout much of the trilogy.
 
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''[http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Splinter_of_the_Mind%27s_Eye Splinter of the Mind's Eye]'' was an early Star Wars novel written before the original film was expanded to a trilogy (and then expanded some more), so it contains multiple aborted subplots which can make it very confusing for a fan who has seen the later works.
 
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The term "EU" refers to "Expanded Universe", which was the term for the corpus of non-cinematic ''Star Wars'' content before ''Star Wars'' was acquired by {{w|Disney}}. Not wanting to be constrained by previous canon, Disney declared all "Expanded Universe" content to be non-canonical to all future movies, and re-branded the EU as "Legends" to take place in its own alternate continuity.
 
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For a very long time, fans believed that the Thrawn Trilogy would have constituted Star Wars VII to IX should the movie have been made and thus "before they figure out there's no movie coming after it" refers to both the mistaken belief of fans and the novelisation as delivered through the opening crawl.
 
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==Transcript==
 
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:[On a black background with many stars is five blocks of yellow text that recedes towards a black section at the back of the panel. The last block cannot be read, but it is (almost) possible to read the second block of text at the back. The bottom line of the last text block is cut off through the middle of the letters.]
 
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:"All systems show battle ready, Admiral," the comm officer reported from the portside crew pit. "The task force is beginning to check in."
 
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:"Very good, Lieutenant," Grand Admiral Thrawn nodded. "Inform me when all have done so. Captain Pellaeon?"
 
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:"Sir?" Pellaeon said, searching his superior's face for the stress the Grand Admiral must be feeling. The stress he himself was certainly feeling. This was not just another tactical strike against the Rebellion, after all—not a minor shipping raid or even a complex but straightforward hit-and-fade against some insignificant planetary base. After nearly a month of frenzied preparations, Thrawn's master campaign for the Empire's final victory was about to be launched.
 
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:But if the Grand Admiral was feeling any tension, he was keeping it to himself. "Begin the countdown," he told
 
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:[Cut off through the middle and at the end]: Pellaeon, his voice as calm as if he were ordering
 
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:[Caption beneath the panel:]
 
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:Movie theater projection booth prank: see how many pages of a Star Wars novel you can get people to read before they figure out there's no movie coming after it.
 
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==Trivia==
 
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*Some of the crawl in the comic is unreadable. But since this is text from a real book [http://www.mustreading.net/Thrawn_Trilogy_03.html the full text] can be found online.
 
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*Here is what would have been readable up to this moment of the "film", if the text was crawling by:
 
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<blockquote style="background-color: #ffc; border: solid thin grey;">
 
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&nbsp;Gliding through the blackness of deep space, the Imperial Star Destroyer Chimaera pointed its mighty arrowhead shape toward the dim star of its target system, three thousandths of a light-year away. And prepared itself for war.<br><br>
 
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&nbsp;"All systems show battle ready, Admiral," the comm officer reported from the portside crew pit. "The task force is beginning to check in."
 
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&nbsp;"Very good, Lieutenant," Grand Admiral Thrawn nodded. "Inform me when all have done so. Captain Pellaeon?"<br><br>
 
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&nbsp;"Sir?" Pellaeon said, searching his superior's face for the stress the Grand Admiral must be feeling. The stress he himself was certainly feeling. This was not just another tactical strike against the Rebellion, after all—not a minor shipping raid or even a complex but straightforward hit-and-fade against some insignificant planetary base. After nearly a month of frenzied preparations, Thrawn's master campaign for the Empire's final victory was about to be launched.<br><br>
 
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&nbsp;But if the Grand Admiral was feeling any tension, he was keeping it to himself. "Begin the countdown," he told Pellaeon, his voice as calm as if he were ordering dinner.</blockquote>
 
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{{comic discussion}}
 
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[[Category:Comics with color]]
 
−
[[Category:Star Wars]]
 

Revision as of 19:06, 26 May 2022

crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap 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