Difference between revisions of "2083: Laptop Issues"

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(Transcript: third and fourth panels)
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{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
 
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
  
:Cueball is walking past a sign reading "Tech Support," with a right-pointing arrow and carrying a laptop.
+
:[Cueball is walking past a sign reading "Tech Support," with a right-pointing arrow and carrying a laptop.]
 
:Off panel voice #1: Oh, No.
 
:Off panel voice #1: Oh, No.
 
:Off panel voice #2: What?
 
:Off panel voice #2: What?
 
:Off panel voice #1: This guy.  He has the worst tech problems.
 
:Off panel voice #1: This guy.  He has the worst tech problems.
  
:Cueball at tech support desk with laptop on desk.  Short-hair guy and Ponytail are there.
+
:[Cueball at tech support desk with laptop on desk.  Short-hair guy and Ponytail are there.]
 
:Cueball: My laptop's battery won't hold a charge.
 
:Cueball: My laptop's battery won't hold a charge.
 
:Short-hair guy: We can replace it.
 
:Short-hair guy: We can replace it.
 
:Cueball: Tried that.  Now the new ones won't either.
 
:Cueball: Tried that.  Now the new ones won't either.
 +
 +
:[Close-up of Cueball]
 +
:Cueball: Also, random files get corrupted on the first day of every month.  Factory reset didn't help.
 +
:Off panel voice #2: You weren't kidding.
 +
 +
:[Close-up of Cueball]
 +
:Cueball: When it's plugged in, I get static shocks from my plumbing.
 +
:Off panel voice: What the...
 +
:Cueball: And it reboots if someone uses an arc welder nearby.
 +
  
 
{{comic discussion}}
 
{{comic discussion}}

Revision as of 16:57, 10 December 2018

Laptop Issues
Hang on, we got a call from the feds. They say we can do whatever with him, but the EPA doesn't want that laptop in the ocean. They're sending a team.
Title text: Hang on, we got a call from the feds. They say we can do whatever with him, but the EPA doesn't want that laptop in the ocean. They're sending a team.

Explanation

Ambox notice.png This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Created by a BOT WITH INEXPLICABLE TECH PROBLEMS. Horribly incomplete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.
If you can address this issue, please edit the page! Thanks.

Cueball goes to tech support with his laptop, explaining all his arcane problems.

My laptop's battery won't hold a charge. A common problem...
Tried that. Now the new ones won't either. This could be an issue with the laptop's battery management hardware.
Also, random files get corrupted on the first of every month. Factory reset didn't help either. Some devices may be scheduled to do a "disk cleanup" on the first of every month. Somehow, this task is corrupting files that should be kept.
When it's plugged in, I get static from my plumbing. TODO
And it reboots if someone uses an arc welder nearby TODO
Transition(R) lenses go dark when exposed to the screen Screen emitting UV rays?
...and when I open too many tabs, it fogs any nearby photographic film. What?!


Transcript

Ambox notice.png This transcript is incomplete. Please help editing it! Thanks.
[Cueball is walking past a sign reading "Tech Support," with a right-pointing arrow and carrying a laptop.]
Off panel voice #1: Oh, No.
Off panel voice #2: What?
Off panel voice #1: This guy. He has the worst tech problems.
[Cueball at tech support desk with laptop on desk. Short-hair guy and Ponytail are there.]
Cueball: My laptop's battery won't hold a charge.
Short-hair guy: We can replace it.
Cueball: Tried that. Now the new ones won't either.
[Close-up of Cueball]
Cueball: Also, random files get corrupted on the first day of every month. Factory reset didn't help.
Off panel voice #2: You weren't kidding.
[Close-up of Cueball]
Cueball: When it's plugged in, I get static shocks from my plumbing.
Off panel voice: What the...
Cueball: And it reboots if someone uses an arc welder nearby.


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Discussion

Please provide links to https://xkcd.com/1084/ and https://xkcd.com/1586/ (unsigned by IP 172.68.65.150

Perhaps also 1760: TV Problems and 1739: Fixing Problems and 806: Tech Support? Quiddity (talk) 05:17, 12 December 2018 (UTC)

I would recommend an exorcism for the laptop. 19:28, 10 December 2018 (UTC)

Has Randall been reading Charles Stross's "The Laundry Files"? 162.158.89.223 19:57, 10 December 2018 (UTC)

Or his neighbor is Harry Dresden.

We had a few people like this at my last job. In addition to all their problems they refused to let us give them a new laptop and insisted we keep trying to fix the ghosts in their current laptop 172.68.58.83 21:18, 10 December 2018 (UTC)

Might this be inspired by the recent revelation that Apple Store employees are not allowed to to use the word "problem": https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/dec/03/claps-and-cheers-apple-stores-carefully-managed-drama 162.158.106.96 22:05, 10 December 2018 (UTC)

Closer reference to https://xkcd.com/349/ than 1912 was to 349 --172.68.59.84 22:53, 10 December 2018 (UTC)

It is possible (if rather rare) that there's an error on a computers logic board, that causes it to fry batteries extremely fast

"(...) and safely dispose of it." - Is there a truly safe way to dispose of this laptop? I can't think of one.--162.158.90.90 09:41, 11 December 2018 (UTC)

This laptop can only be destroyed by throwing it into the fires of Mount Doom 162.158.158.45 10:39, 11 December 2018 (UTC)

--Shouldn't that be "...the fires of Mount Dell, from which it was forged?" 172.68.58.83 16:52, 11 December 2018 (UTC)

Andromeda Galaxy is on collision course with ours. It has black hole in it's center. I think that throwing the laptop there should be safe enough. I mean, maybe it will solve the problem with collision ... -- Hkmaly (talk) 00:42, 12 December 2018 (UTC)
No, we need to put it in quarantine WITH a black hole and mount Doom/Dell. Nyx goddess (talk) 01:54, 12 December 2018 (UTC)

Could the glasses be a refence to the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy? [1] 141.101.98.28 09:43, 14 December 2018 (UTC)

Is it just me or when they said photographic i thought they said pornographic?