279: Pickup Lines

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Pickup Lines
That shirt looks good on you, but it would look even better stuffed onto the neck of a vodka bottle and flung burning through our office building's window. Let's fucking do it and never look back.
Title text: That shirt looks good on you, but it would look even better stuffed onto the neck of a vodka bottle and flung burning through our office building's window. Let's fucking do it and never look back.

Explanation

This comic adds strange twists to some classic abysmally cheesy pickup lines. Warning, terrible puns ahead:

  • "If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together."
Cueball is making a "your sister" joke. A different variation of this line is featured in 1069: Alphabet.
A Jetta is a car, and Cueball is implying that the father is an actual thief.
  • "You must be tired, 'cause you've been running through my mind all night."
He adds the word "Screaming," to make the word "running" be literal instead of figurative.

This is yet another example of Beret Guy's bartender job.

The title text refers to a pickup line like this: "That shirt looks good on you, but would look even better on my bedroom floor." But here the shirt is used as fuse for a Molotov cocktail thrown into their office.

Transcript

[Cueball at a bar.]
Cueball: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put your sister and I together.
Cueball: Is your father a thief? Because that's totally my Jetta you parked outside.
Cueball: You must be tired, 'cause you've been running through my mind all night.
Cueball: Screaming.


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Discussion

"Is your father a thief? because that's totally my jetta you parked outside." looks similar to a "because he stole the brightest star in the heavens to make you", or altenatively starting differently as "Are you a thief? Because you've stolen my heart." But I don't know what to insert into the Explanation. There may be other alternative 'originals'.

The Title-Text line is definitely a perversion of "That <piece of clothing> looks good on you, but would look even better on my bedroom floor." Unless you can think of anything else.

(No, I've not used any of these, before you ask. Although maybe they would have been preferable to what I have used.) 178.98.31.27 01:06, 20 June 2013 (UTC)