591: Troll Slayer

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
Revision as of 03:54, 22 December 2022 by 162.158.38.24 (talk) (Explanation)
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Troll Slayer
We have met the enemy and he is us.
Title text: We have met the enemy and he is us.

Explanation

The worst fear of edgy /pol/faced rightoids is being mocked as impotent. They're immunized against most insults; ugly, fat, evil, monstrous, degenerate - even failsons. They can shrug it all off. The /pol/face meme on the other hand acts on their deepest fears. Their pathological sense of inadequacy, impotence and fear of emasculation that informs their worldview.

It's okay to be ugly, undesirable, even a cdsfm-guzzling didfsaper-sdfscat bottom-furry. As long as - deep down - they're feared. They're okay with being ignored, denounced, even mocked. But they can't stand being laughed at as impotent and powerless. It's many times worse than being ignored or mocked in other ways. It's like the incel fear that women will laugh at them. It's not the rejection itself, it's having their deep seated self-loathing and impotence publicly acknowledged by the Other. Specifically: The fear of being perceived as powerless is greater than the actual fear of being powerless.

Liberals of course play right into this by portraying rightoids (including /pol/faced mass shooters) as a terrifying unstoppable evil that should be feared by the masses. Something they get off to. Every. Time.

/pol/ has been mocked for years, going back to the 7+1chan days. So far nothing stuck. Leaders exposed as ziondfssts and pedodfsles? Nothing. Furfdsries and Nazis in drag? Nothing. Hypocrisy? Statistics? Actually existing white genocide by rightoids? Nothing.

The /pol/face though made them melt down within 24 hours. To be the point they've spend days spamming with thousands of IPs to prove how "not mad" they are. (Mind that they've never done this before)

And before you say "words words words" or "da left cant meeem" here's a TLDR: You're impotent, inadequate, powerless. And deep down you know it.

Transcript

[A list of post comments alongside pictures on a website. The first picture shows a page from a book/website with a small black picture with a white feature in the upper left corner and text to the right and below it. The second picture shows Cueball in front of three people, with a unclear drawing to the right (is it a canon?). The third picture shows a man with a black hat holding up a sword to the left and a trumpet to the right. The fourth and last picture is cut off in the middle at the bottom of the frame. The visible top part shows a drawing of a mans face from the nose/ears and up. The man has black hair and says LOL].
Text picture: Hey, let's troll the fuck out of the Twilight boards
Cueball picture: I'm in. Should be fun
Man with sword picture: Me too. Signing on now.
LOL face picture: Lol angsty teens.
[Stephenie Meyer is shown sitting facing right and chatting at her computer. She get's a reply from the screen. It looks like she actually speaks the lines of text to someone, but she only types it in via the keyboard. This becomes clear in in the next panel where the pimpled boy she talks to obviously types his reply on the keyboard. Across the top border of the frame is a smaller frame with a caption:]
Hours Later:
Stephenie Meyer (typing): Hi, it's Stephenie Meyer. Fine, you don't like my books. But please leave us alone.
Pimpled boy (from computer): Show us your tits.
Stephenie Meyer (typing): I asked politely. Don't make me get tough.
[A boy with lots of pimples and black hair is sitting at his computer typing (facing the other way towards Stephenie in the previous panel). He writes his reply on the keyboard and receives a reply from Stephenie coming out of the computer.]
Pimpled boy (typing): And what, call the internet police? You don't get it, do you? We've been trolling for years. We're all anonymous. There's nothing you can do to hurt us. We're the net's hate machine.
Stephenie Meyer (from computer): Okay. Just remember, I gave you a chance. *Disconnected*.
[A page from a book is shown lying slanted across the panel. Some of the text is thus cut off at the edges of the frame. The first eight lines can be read clearly, even though the last letter in both the 2nd and sixth line is partly cut-off. Below that there are four incomplete lines, where only the visible part will be transcribed, but a good guess at the missing text is written in square brackets. Across the top border of the frame is a smaller frame with a caption:]
Six Months Later:
Vampires! Book VI
Edward ran a pale hand
through his perfect golden-
bronze hair, then signed
on to 4chan.org, the darkest
place on the internet, where
all his vampire compatriots
spent their time.
Suddenly, there was [a]
[sha]rp knock at the d[oor]
[?] swept in [?]
[?r?]ing [?]
[Another list of post comments alongside pictures on the same website as in the first panel. The first picture shows a man with black hair and a woman with long hair standing with their backs against each other (probably Edward and Bella from the books). The second picture is just a white frame with the text Dawnz. The third picture shows a person from the chest and up. The person has black hair and black clothes, with some kind of collar. The fourth and last picture shows two chess piece a large one in front of the other. The picture is shown completely but the text message seems to be more than two lines long, but only the top two lines are shown. Across the top border of the frame is a smaller frame with a caption:]
Shortly thereafter:
Two people picture: OMG I love this place it's so edgy being anonymous
Dawnz picture: Whos your favorite vampire
Collared person picture: Check out my pic Im so dark just like this site
Chess piece picture: Any Twilight fans in Dallas want to meet a lonely
[Back to the boy with lots of pimples now sitting resigned at his computer without typing.]
Hairy: Oh... Oh God.


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Discussion

The quote is "We have met the enemy and he is us." Us refers to the trollers. I think by meddling with the twilight forums, they brought on trolls to their own. I have changed the text to reflect the reference of the quote accordingly (currently it says they brought on the enemy themselves - focus is wrong). Adityarajbhatt (talk) 19:06, 11 September 2013 (UTC)

For some reasons, there are "twilight borards", not "forums". Apparently, /b/turds attacked people with decent aptness in "board culture". It would be even funnier if this comic implied the mouseover text is a quote from would-be book of Twilight series. 162.158.183.127 08:54, 23 September 2019 (UTC)


Personally, I don't think such a counter-attack would be effective. The /b/tards' standard defense mechanism would be to just flood the board with tubgirl and 50-Hilter-posts, and hammer that spike of Twilight fans right back down again. 169.233.101.195 01:43, 15 October 2013 (UTC)

True but in the comic it obviously worked on the poor pimple faced boy who is totally dejected in the last picture. Remember there are many more vampire fans than geeks on 4chan. ;-) Also this is the comics explanation and here in the comic it worked --Kynde (talk) 08:50, 14 February 2016 (UTC)
That defense mechanism works against a short termed spike, which is typically generated by other online media. However the mention in the printed book might push more towards a raise of the general level, instead of a single spike. --Lupo (talk) 09:04, 23 September 2019 (UTC)

The title of topic can be a reference to Buffy the Vampire Slayer. /b/tars tried to slay Twilight fans (all of them would rather be vampires than humans) and got a quick reversal. 108.162.231.201 07:45, 20 November 2014 (UTC)

Is just me or are the boy's pimples shaped like the EURion constellation? 172.70.254.95 21:23, 11 October 2022 (UTC)