1057: Klout

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Klout
Though please do confirm that it's actually *me* on Klout first, and not one of my friends trying to get me punched. The great thing about this douchebag deadman switch is that I will never dare trigger it.
Title text: Though please do confirm that it's actually *me* on Klout first, and not one of my friends trying to get me punched. The great thing about this douchebag deadman switch is that I will never dare trigger it.

[edit] Explanation

Ambox notice.png This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: It says Randall has a score on Klout. Does Klout rate users that have not signed up? That is quote important to know, because else anyone meeting Randall should by his wishes hit him in the face... Also who is the "douchebag" in the "douchebag deadman switch"? Is it a Randall that uses Klout or those that might hit him or set him up to be hit? And does this comic scare Randall so he never dares trigger the switch by using Klout?
If you can address this issue, please edit the page! Thanks.
Klout is a site that seeks to measure your "influence" on social media networks. They sometimes give away "perks" to the users with the highest Klout scores, as a means of advertising the products of their sponsors. Generally, the information provided by Klout is not held in high esteem. The type of person who takes most interest in their score is typically not well-liked.

There are multiple ways that Klout measures your influence. An example of increasing influence is having been given a +K (a recommendation for a higher score) for knowledge about "Pitbull" (The Bud Light promoter and producer/rapper/musician, etc., not the type of dog). Another could be having an inspiring tweet that generated 2000 retweets. Klout supports many social networks, and ranks people based primarily on how much reaction they garner from the public. For example, if Selena Gomez tweeted that she simply loved a certain blog, she would probably get more people to visit that blog, and thus get a bigger Klout score, than if the mayor of Anchorage, Alaska tweeted that he liked that blog. However, their "about us" page does claim that a small, active group of followers is considered more influential than a large, passive group of followers.

The gist of the comic is that Cueball (here representing Randall) does not feel that Klout agrees with his core values, probably as he prefers self-assurance to having an outside authority tell him of his importance to society. He uses this comic to give himself incentive to stay away from Klout. He is very clear that he is dead serious about anyone meeting him after he has (been proven to have) used Klout should punch him in the face. He even makes sure that he cannot later retract this statement, if he for instance becomes interested in Klout (something he never wish for). Because his last statement is that people should ignore anything he says to retract this statement later.

Randall will now have a problem though because since he also posted the 706: Freedom comic earlier, he will never knows if people that hit him does because they believe he has used Klout or just to exercise their free will.

In the title text a "dead man's switch" is any mechanism which is designed to activate if the user does not take any action. This is generally used to create a failsafe in case the user is incapacitated. For example, many exercise treadmills include a tether meant to connect the runner to the machine's base station. If the runner gets too far from the base station, the tether pulls a pin and the machine stops immediately. This way, if the runner has fallen or is struggling to keep up, the machine does not exacerbate an already unsafe situation. This "douchebag deadman switch" is predicated on Randall becoming somebody unrecognizable to his current self.

Randall was rated, having a 46 (out of 100) on Klout as of shortly after the posting of this comic. If Randall didn't want to join Klout, that means that somebody who read the comic may have made an account for Randall.

[edit] Transcript

[Randall has drawn himself as Cueball in a slim panel:]
Randall: I'd like to ask a favor.
Randall: If someday, in the future, we meet in person,
[Zoom out of Randall talking.]
Randall: And if, as of that day, I've interacted with Klout in any way except to opt out,
Randall: I want you to punch me in the face without warning.
[Zoom in on Randall's head.]
Randall: This may sound like a joke, so let me be clear:
Randall: I am dead serious.
Randall: Ignore anything I say retracting this.
Randall: Thank you.


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Discussion

Klout is looong dead now. I suppose this means it's niche and hipster, and it's fine to use it now. Davidy22[talk] 13:53, 8 January 2013 (UTC)

its not dead... just not really as trendy anymore.--Calvsie (talk) 21:01, 12 December 2013 (UTC)

Any possible meaning in the fact that "clout" can mean a blow from a hand? I think it might be related, considering the site is called Klout and Randall requests being clouted, in a manner of speaking... 173.245.54.209 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Replace "Klout" with "Google+" for modern relevance. Keavon (talk) 00:02, 10 November 2014 (UTC)

Interacting with Google+ should not have anywhere close to Klout in "douchebagness", if any. Arifsaha (talk) 23:53, 5 December 2014 (UTC)
Also, Randall does have a Google Plus. https://plus.google.com/111588569124648292310/posts Benjaminikuta (talk) 08:32, 17 February 2015 (UTC)

Never make something like this unretractable, just in case the business you now hate changes its focus and becomes something worthwhile.173.245.50.174 18:21, 7 September 2015 (UTC)

Or it goes away entirely and something unrelated and much better by the same name appears later. --172.68.10.172 02:32, 9 March 2017 (UTC)
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