Title text: Though please do confirm that it's actually *me* on Klout first, and not one of my friends trying to get me punched. The great thing about this douchebag deadman switch is that I will never dare trigger it.
Klout is a site that seeks to measure your "influence" on social media networks. They sometimes give away "perks" to the users with the highest Klout scores, as a means of advertising the products of their sponsors. Generally, the information provided by Klout is not held in high esteem. The type of person who takes most interest in their score is typically not well-liked.
There are multiple ways that Klout measures your influence. An example of increasing influence is having been given a +K (a recommendation for a higher score) for knowledge about "Pitbull" (The Bud Light promoter and producer/rapper/musician, etc., not the type of dog). Another could be having an inspiring tweet that generated 2000 retweets. Klout supports many social networks, and ranks people based primarily on how much reaction they garner from the public. For example, if Selena Gomez tweeted that she simply loved a certain blog, she would probably get more people to visit that blog, and thus get a bigger Klout score, than if the mayor of Anchorage, Alaska tweeted that he liked that blog. However, their "about us" page does claim that a small, active group of followers is considered more influential than a large, passive group of followers.
The gist of the comic is that Randall does not feel that Klout agrees with his core values, probably as he prefers self-assurance to having an outside authority tell him of his importance to society. He uses this comic to give himself incentive to stay away from Klout. However, he is still rated, having a 46 (out of 100) as of shortly after the posting of this comic.
The character appears to be Randall, considering the title text. A "dead man's switch" is any mechanism which is designed to activate if the user does not take any action. This is generally used to create a failsafe in case the user is incapacitated. For example, many exercise treadmills include a tether meant to connect the runner to the machine's base station. If the runner gets too far from the base station, the tether pulls a pin and the machine stops immediately. This way, if the runner has fallen or is struggling to keep up, the machine does not exacerbate an already unsafe situation. This "douchebag deadman switch" is predicated on Randall becoming somebody unrecognizable to his current self.
- Randall: I'd like to ask a favor. If someday, in the future, we meet in person,
- Randall: And if, as of that day, I've interacted with Klout in any way except to opt out, I want you to punch me in the face without warning.
- Randall: This may sound like a joke, so let me be clear: I am dead serious. Ignore anything I say retracting this. Thank you.