2473: Product Launch
Title text: "Okay, that was weird, but the product reveal was normal. I think the danger is pas--" "One more thing." "Oh no."
Three people are discussing the upcoming public announcement of their company's new product, apparently an electronic device shown on the pedestal between them. Tech companies will often debut a major new project with a presentation, inviting reporters and other influential figures to see the new product for the first time, and have its features demonstrated. These presentations are intended to generate both awareness and positive publicity, and so are styled to be attention-getting, with a good deal of showmanship and dramatic descriptions.
Hairy mentions that smart devices can make people uncomfortable. Common reasons include:
- It is impossible for consumers to know what the device is really doing (since it is a "black box" with inaccessible software).
- The device could stop working in the future due to poor quality or software problems;
- The device could be used to spy on its owner or others, including ones who did not consent to this by purchasing the device.
- The device could represent a security or even safety risk by allowing hackers or other groups access to the network or any systems that the device controls.
- The device could significantly alter the life of the user via digital addiction.
To allay these concerns, the device should be presented as non-threatening. Cueball asks to confirm the non, implying that this was not clear to him before. In fact, it even appears he thought he was being asked to put together a threatening presentation, but does not explain.
Later, Cueball presents the device on-stage, with statements that are clearly styled to carry double meanings which tend to sound foreboding, even if the product being presented is benign or beneficial.
- He confirms that the product can "change the world for good or evil" (specifying that evil is an option suggests that this product has potential for evil).
- The "plaintive cries of [the company's] customers" sounds worrying, while such cries might be demands for a new product, the same phrase would be used if people were distressed by the product.
- The company wants to "give [customers] what they deserve" doesn't specify whether he believes they deserve reward or punishment.
- Instead of being merely uncovered, the product is being exposed to the atmosphere (implying a chemical or physical reaction) and is to affect customers within five city blocks (nearly 1 km). That kind of specific radius of impact is usually associated with a disaster, such as an explosion or chemical attack.
- When someone in the audience decides to leave in the middle of the presentation, Cueball reassures them that a "staggering" large number of people will survive. Bringing up the number of people who will survive implies that there will be fatalities, which is not an expected feature of most product launches.
In the title text, someone is saying that the actual reveal was uneventful. Cueball interrupts, implying that there is one last feature to demonstrate. This is likely a reference to Steve Jobs, who was famous for presenting such product launches as CEO of Apple Inc. Jobs would often appear to finish his presentation, then say "one more thing," before surprising the audience with another unexpected feature. In this case, however, the presentation is so foreboding that people are relieved when it seems to end without danger. When Cueball has more to demonstrate, they assume that the real threat is still coming.
Besides the main joke of a product that is likely so unsafe as to be illegal, the comic could also be poking fun at the desire of tech companies to make their products sound important, which can undermine the message of benign safety.
This comic was released on the day of Apple's 2021 WWDC (Worldwide Developer Conference) keynote, at which the company traditionally announces new features and products.
- [Hairy and Ponytail are standing to the left of a wrapped object. Cueball is standing on the right.]
- Hairy: The press is here for the product launch!
- Hairy: Remember, people are wary of smart devices, so we want to strike a non-threatening tone.
- [Pan over to just Cueball; Hairy and Ponytail are off of the left side of the panel.]
- Cueball: Hang on, did you say non-threatening?
- Hairy: Yes. Why-
- Cueball: Nothing. It's probably fine.
- [Caption: Soon...]
- [Cueball is standing on a platform next to the previously seen wrapped object.]
- Cueball: They say technology can change the world, for good or for evil. Our new product will show how true that is.
- Cueball: We hear the plaintive cries of our customers. We want to give them what they deserve.
- [Zoom in on Cueball, who has his hand up in a gesture.]
- Cueball: Now, let us expose our product to the atmosphere for the first time, surprising and delighting customers within a five-block radius.
- (Voice off-panel): I'm leaving.
- Cueball: No, don't worry! A staggering number of people will survive!
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