Editing 2919: Sitting in a Tree

“[Name] and [name], sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G” (pronounced as the names of the letters, e.g. "kay eye ess ess eye en gee") is the start of a common US schoolyard taunt to tease others about their alleged romance. As the comic notes, the rhyme can use a range of normal seven-letter {{w|present participle}}s of verbs.

This comic lists a diverse group of eighteen seven-letter gerunds which Cueball and Megan could be accused of performing in a tree, and organizes them into three categories: Normal, Slightly Worrying and Very Alarming. Each list of gerunds has an illustration of its last one: kissing, ironing and smiting, respectively.

:'''{{w|Reading}}''' is an activity usually encouraged, which can be performed in a tree without any additional danger.

:'''{{w|Singing}}''' is similar to reading in that it is a good thing that does not become dangerous by doing it in a tree.

:'''{{w|Playing}}''' is what most children are doing when they climb trees.

:'''{{w|Sharing}}''' is a good thing.  Though it could potentially be hazardous in a tree, due to slightly increased risk of falling while trying to share, it is not a major concern.

:'''{{w|Hugging}}''' is a physical sign of affection (romantic or otherwise), which doesn't change much due to the treetop locale.

:'''{{w|Kissing}}''' is the activity illustrated in the panel.  It is the most normal thing to be sung in the song, as it is the traditional taunt.

:'''{{w|Sobbing}}''' is an act of weeping heavily, e.g. due to a setback in one's relationship, or perhaps due to being stuck up a tree.

:'''{{w|Itching}}''' is feeling a sensation on one's skin that makes one want to scratch or rub it, and may happen due to mosquito bites or other bugs, or perhaps an allergic reaction to tree bark.

:'''{{w|Pruning}}''' is cutting off the branches of a tree, which is very dangerous if one is sitting on said branch.{{Citation needed}}

:'''{{w|Banking}}''' is conducting financial business with a bank, or if one works for the financial institution, conducting financial business with a customer cohort.  Most banks do not have branches in trees{{cn}} but with suitable equipment, online banking in a tree is quite possible if a little unusual.

:'''{{w|Post#Communications|Posting}}''' is to publish posts on social media. An antiquated definition is to send {{w|mail}} using a postal service.  This may be worrying due to a perceived addiction to technology.

:'''{{w|Ironing}}''' is smoothing clothes with an iron and a flat surface, like an ironing board. This is the activity illustrated in the panel.  It should not be performed in a tree, due to safety concerns.

:'''{{w|Molting}}''' is shedding one's skin. Many insects molt in trees, such as cicadas, grasshoppers, and termites.  For humans to molt, something would have to be very wrong indeed.

:'''{{w|Whaling}}''' is hunting whales, which has been outlawed in the US since the 1980s. Whales aren't usually found in trees.^{[''{{w|List of cetaceans|cetacean needed}}'']} And since the letter 'W' is three syllables when sung aloud, this is the only gerund in the comic that doesn't have the standard seven syllables of the traditional taunt.

:'''{{w|E-filing}}''' is submitting one's tax returns online, common in the US. This comic was published a few days before the US tax deadline. E-filing could quite reasonably be done from a tree using a laptop or other portable computing device, but is not typically performed by schoolchildren.

:'''{{w|Melting}}''' is turning from a solid state to a liquid state, which is usually fatal.

:'''{{w|Radiography|X-raying}}''' is using {{w|X-ray}} radiation to image someone or something for medical or security purposes, not normally conducted in trees. With enough radiation, the X-rays could be fatal.

:'''{{wiktionary|smite#English|Smiting}}''' is striking down, destroying or killing, often with divine power called from a god. This is the activity illustrated in the panel.

The title text continues the S-M-I-T-I-N-G version of the chant with a parody of the traditional {{w|Children's song#Game songs|next verses}}, "...first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carriage" (which reflects the common social expectations that any kissers might follow the path of). Instead, the parody appears to be a dark prophecy about the grim ramifications of smiting directed by the tree-ensconced kids:

# the {{w|Mass fatality incident|mass fatality}} of the taunt singers

# the vehicular arrival of a {{w|Death (personification)|personified Death}}.

It might indeed be alarming to hear schoolkids singing about their own bloody death from divine judgment, channeled by their tree-ensconced peers. It might not be out of place if the kids are all part of a death cult, and the children in the tree are believed to have the power to direct divine punishment.

The last line may be an allusion to the Emily Dickinson poem "[https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/47652/because-i-could-not-stop-for-death-479 Because I Could Not Stop For Death]", which refers both to Death riding in a carriage and eternity. The comic was posted in April, National Poetry Month. Munroe also referenced "Because I Could Not Stop For Death" in [[788: The Carriage]].  

The combination of "Death" from the title text and "E-Filing" is similar to the "{{w|Death and taxes (idiom)|Death and Taxes}}" idiom.

[[Category:Kids]]