Editing 1465: xkcd Phone 2
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==Explanation== | ==Explanation== | ||
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− | + | This is a followup to [[1363: xkcd Phone]], which debuted the original xkcd phone - but this phone is ''for your other hand''... Since very few people can use two phones at the same time, this is a hopeless advertising line. | |
− | + | Like xkcd Phone "1", this comic parodies modern smartphone advertising with a promotional image for a fictional phone. Like the previous xkcd phone, the comic touts a variety of features which are either pointless, misleading, or physically impossible. They are clockwise, from the top left: | |
− | : 350 | + | *'''MaxHD: Over 350 pixels per screen''': 350 pixels is not very impressive: Each would be about 0.5×0.5 cm. Even if it implies 350 pixels along the edge this is still less than standard definition TV (PAL gives 576 lines of horizontal resolution). Likely a reference to HD+, FullHD, QuadHD and other marketing expressions for screen resolutions, by which common users are often confused. In [[732: HDTV]] Randall has observed that HD is not an especially high resolution, when compared with smartphone or computer monitors. This one is even worse, by far, but MaxHD sounds similar to FullHD, so it could fool some users into thinking that this is equal or better. |
− | + | : ''Note:'' A high pixel density display is more than 200 pixels per '''''inch''''', not per '''''screen'''''. An example would be the Retina Display in Apple hardware which varies from 218 pixels per inch to 401 pixels per inch depending on the device. | |
− | + | *'''Always on Speaker''': An always on microphone is a genuine feature. It allows voice activated intelligent personal assistant software such as Google's "Google Now" or Apple's "Siri" to respond without having to be turned on. An always on speaker would be less useful especially if it implies the phone is always making noise. | |
− | + | *'''Blood Pressure reliever''': This appears to be where a real phone would have its front facing camera. This could imply that it's a sharp part that you can cut yourself on, thus '''''relieving''''' your blood pressure, or else implying that the other features of the phone are so frustrating that a feature was required to relieve the users' blood pressure. This is likely a play on modern smartphones with built-in heart rate/blood pressure sensors. | |
− | : An always | + | *'''Auto-Rotating Case:''' Phones often feature an "auto-rotating screen", meaning that the display switches between portrait and landscape mode depending on its orientation with respect to gravity. But the case is a physical part of the phone, so making a case that did '''not''' "auto-rotate" with the phone would be the real challenge. |
− | + | *'''Ribbed:''' A reference to ribbed {{w|condom}}s, which are often advertised as superior to standard ones because the texture can be more physically stimulating to the genitalia. Some other objects can be advertised with the word ribbed as well, but mostly in the context where it allows a firmer grip on the device when wet. Since phones are usually not meant to be used wet it is still a fairly useless feature. | |
− | + | *'''Waterproof (inside only)''': Waterproofing is done to the outside to prevent water from getting in. Exactly what "inside only" means is unclear (the case may be porous, or it may prevent water from ''escaping'') but it's clear that the designers have missed the point. | |
− | + | *'''Googleable''': Another non-feature. Advertising as "-able" is a way for marketing to add features, without adding features. This may be (for example) a recyclable paper bag, when paper is normally recyclable. Any term may be "googled" so being "googleable" is not an actual feature. | |
− | : This appears to be where a real phone would have its front facing camera. This could imply that it's a sharp part that you can cut yourself on, thus ''relieving'' your blood pressure, or else implying that the other features of the phone are so frustrating that a feature was required to relieve the users' blood pressure. This is likely a play on modern smartphones with built-in heart rate/blood pressure sensors. | + | *'''Cheek toucher''': The screen will touch your cheek when making a hand-held phone call. |
− | + | *'''Cries if lost:''' Arguably a useful function, for it would help the owner find the cellphone in case it was lost. This is offset by how annoying it would sound if cried with a human voice. It refers to people's habit of calling their own cellphones to help find it. It also resembles the first xkcd phone's functions of 'Screaming when falling' and 'Saying hi when lit'. | |
− | + | *'''Bug drawer:''' This is most likely the cover for other ports, though looks like a small drawer, capable of only holding bug-sized items. Possibly a joke on software bugs, which would, being virtual rather than physical, easily fit inside this area. One might also introduce bugs to your phone in this way. May also be a reference to "Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal" from the original ''xkcd Phone'' comic. | |
− | + | *'''Coin slot:''' In most phones, this would be the charging port. Payphones have coin slots. | |
− | : Phones often feature an "auto-rotating screen", meaning that the display switches between portrait and landscape mode depending on its orientation with respect to gravity. But the case is a physical part of the phone, so making a case that did '''not''' "auto-rotate" with the phone would be the real challenge. | + | *'''Scroll lock:''' A computer key on most keyboards which is practically never used. It is also placed where a usual cellphone's "home" button is, making it very frustrating. (Despite [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/978 a previous xkcd strip] it was not invented by {{w|Steven Chu}}.) |
− | + | *'''OS by Stackoverflow®:''' [http://stackoverflow.com/ Stack Overflow] is a very useful and popular question/answer forum for programmers, and many recent software products probably have benefited from advice given there, so Randall may be giving credit where credit really is due. Or it may be a reference to the rampant problem of code reuse, where programmers use the pre-written code on Stack Overflow rather than writing their own, regardless of the fact that the code on Stack Overflow may contain bugs or otherwise cause problems for their specific program. | |
− | + | *'''3D Materials:''' All real materials are three-dimensional, so this feature is not special. | |
− | + | *'''Dog Noticer''': Alerts the user to nearby dogs, or alerts nearby dogs of the user. | |
− | : A | + | *'''FitBit® Fitness Evaluator''': {{w|Fitbit}} make wristbands that measure heartrate, count user steps, and act as an aid to planning an exercise program. This comic is published on Boxing Day (26th December) 2014 and is relevant as Fitbits are a popular Holiday Gift at this time. However, the name "Fitness Evaluator" suggests that the product merely gives an evaluation on the user's fitness, which may mean that in practice it only criticizes the user's weight, diet etc. |
− | + | *'''Volume and density control:''' A play on words between {{w|volume (disambiguation)|volume}} as in speaker loudness, and {{w|volume}} as in a physical property inversely related to {{w|density}}. Apparently this would allow the user to change the size of the phone (which would indeed be a very useful feature, [[1422: My Phone is Dying|or a very worrying one]]), thus changing the volume and the density. Note that some computer mice have a feature where the user can put weights inside the case to customise the weight and thus affect the density in a different way. | |
− | + | *'''Washable, though only once.''' (the title text): The phone can physically be washed (a play on "washing machine safe" or "dishwasher safe" in real advertisements), however after the first time doing this the phone will cease to function. | |
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− | : Waterproofing is done to the outside to prevent water from getting in. Exactly what " | ||
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− | : Another non-feature. Advertising as "-able" is a way for marketing to add features, without | ||
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==Transcript== | ==Transcript== | ||
− | :[An image of a smartphone | + | :[An image of a smartphone. Coming off from it are many labels. Clockwise, from the top left they are:] |
:MaxHD: Over 350 pixels per screen | :MaxHD: Over 350 pixels per screen | ||
:Always-on speaker | :Always-on speaker | ||
Line 89: | Line 40: | ||
:Auto-rotating case | :Auto-rotating case | ||
:Ribbed | :Ribbed | ||
− | :Waterproof | + | :Waterproof (interior only) |
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:Googleable | :Googleable | ||
:Cheek toucher | :Cheek toucher | ||
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:[Below the phone:] | :[Below the phone:] | ||
− | :< | + | :<font size="3"> Introducing </font> |
− | :< | + | :<font size="5"> The xkcd phone 2 </font> |
:A phone for your other hand® | :A phone for your other hand® | ||
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{{comic discussion}} | {{comic discussion}} | ||
− | + | [[Category:Smartphones]] | |
− | [[Category: | ||
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