Editing 1474: Screws

{{comic
| number    = 1474
| date      = January 16, 2015
| title     = Screws
| image     = screws.png
| titletext = If you encounter a hex bolt, but you only brought screwdrivers, you can try sandwiching the head of the bolt between two parallel screwdriver shafts, squeezing the screwdrivers together with a hand at either end, then twisting. It doesn't work and it's a great way to hurt yourself, but you can try it!
}}

==Explanation==
This comic uses a similar structure and is based off of the same idea as [[1714: Volcano Types]] and [[1874: Geologic Faults]]. Appliance makers sometimes use {{w|List of screw drives|strange screw heads}} to hinder attempts from users to remove appliance covers. Users usually have handy {{w|screwdrivers}} for the first two screw types drawn, Phillips and Flat. More advanced users usually have some less standard drivers, such as {{w|Torx}} or {{w|Allen key|Allen}}, however appliance makers keep designing increasingly strange {{w|List of screw drives|screw heads}} and users keep acquiring increasingly strange screwdrivers.

The comic is about the frustration a user may feel when faced with a screw for which they have no screwdriver. Usually the user will try to fit one of the drivers they have handy into the strange screw, leading to damaging the screw and/or the driver and/or the person wielding the tool.

The types of screws listed are the following:

{| class="wikitable"
! style="width: 25%"|Screw type
! Description
|-
| Phillips head
| {{w|List of screw drives#Phillips|Phillips screw drive}} and its corresponding screw head is one of the most recognizable types of screw heads that is commonly used in construction. This type of screw head was named after its inventor, a US businessman {{w|Henry F. Phillips}}. Neither the inventor nor his invention have any relationship to the Dutch electronics manufacturing company with similar, but not exactly the same name {{w|Philips}}. Technically speaking, this is not a Phillips, as a Phillips screw head is rounded at the center; it is actually a {{w|List of screw drives#Frearson|Frearson screw drive}}.
|-
| Flat head
|  {{w|List_of_screw_drives#Slot|Slot head screws}} are frequently erroneously referred to as flat heads (a flat head screw refers, in fact, to the shape of the screw head, regardless of the shape of the drive socket). The slot head is also commonly used in construction. The diagram shows the slot truncated, while typically the slot almost always runs across the entire head of the screw (as in the case of the "uranium screw" below).
|-
| Uh oh. Maybe it's on Amazon? (pentagram-shaped screw)
| Manufacturers sometimes use screws that require special screwdrivers in order to prevent the customer from opening the product. The reference to Amazon is presumably a suggestion to search {{w|Amazon.com}} for the screwdriver. A number of star-shaped screw heads exist, notably the six-pointed {{w|Torx}}, and {{w|Apple Inc.|Apple}}'s rounded {{w|Pentalobe screw|pentalobe screw}}, although there is no popular design that uses the 5-pointed star shape depicted in the comic. Torx screws are common in automotive applications — Phillips heads are designed to "{{w|cam out}}" at high {{w|torque}} to protect the screw, whereas Torx do not — and on bicycles where a higher tightening torque is needed than hex screws can support. They are also commonly used on {{w|disk brake}} mounts and in {{w|smartphones}}.

|-
| Cursed &minus;1 Phillips head
| The head of a screw can be stripped by overuse, tightening the screw too much, using the wrong size screwdriver, or other misuse. As the driving surfaces wear away, removing the screw becomes more difficult, and the added pressure needed to drive the screw usually damages it further. 

The addition of "cursed" and "&minus;1" in the titles is a reference to various role playing games (e.g. ''{{w|Dungeons and Dragons}}''), where magical "cursed" items appear frequently. This often makes the cursed equipment (in the case of armor or weapons) incredibly difficult to remove, as it will cling to the wielder. Similarly, the cursed Phillips Head screw becomes difficult to remove due to the stripped head. Alternatively, this may imply that the damage to the screw head was caused ''because'' the screw is "cursed" and therefore difficult to remove.

The "&minus;1" refers to the damage of the screw head. In role playing games, items such as weapons and armor may have an "enchantment", with a positive enchantment making the item more effective, and a negative enchantment making the item less effective. Negatively enchanted items are often also cursed, as is the case with this screw head. The "&minus;1" does not appear to be a reference to a {{w|List_of_screw_drives#Phillips|Phillips bit-size number}}, as those are always positive.

|-
| Crap, it's a ''rivet''.
| A {{w|rivet}} is not a screw — it is a permanent fastener which is secured by deforming the body of the fastener. Rivets cannot be removed with a screwdriver, they must be drilled out. Some bolts also have rounded rivet-style heads, though, which need a {{w|collet}}-style tool to grip and remove.
|-
| Phillips head ruiner ''(actually a hex screw)''
| A reference to the fact that {{w|List_of_screw_drives#Hex_socket|hex socket}} screws can, in a pinch, be removed with a Phillips screwdriver (rather than the intended {{w|Allen wrench}}) but this will likely ruin the screwdriver (and damage the screw) in the process. 
|-
| Uranium screw
| Uranium screws were [http://blog.nuclearsecrecy.com/2014/11/10/fat-mans-uranium/ used] in the [http://www.scintillators.ru/booc/criticality/reports/ref_050.pdf construction] of [http://www.osti.gov/scitech/servlets/purl/769001 nuclear weapons] during the twentieth century. Multiple radially extending short wave-like lines around the screw head symbolize radiant energy output, although real uranium screws were most likely made of {{w|depleted uranium}}, which is [http://www.gulflink.osd.mil/du_ii/du_ii_tabc.htm 40 percent less radioactive] than naturally-occurring raw {{w|uranium}}.
|-
| Phillip's head
| This is a morbidly literal interpretation of the misuse of an apostrophe in "Phillip's head". This "screw" is actually a bloody bag containing the severed head of someone named "Phillip" (an all too common modern respelling of the more classic "Philip", perhaps in part influenced by the more typical "Phillips" surname). Intentionally or otherwise, this last punchline could be described as a "{{tvtropes|MindScrew|mind screw}}".
|-
|Hex bolt (title text)
|A {{w|List_of_screw_drives#Hex|hex bolt}} has six external sides, so it could in theory be held by squeezing two screwdriver shafts together with the bolt in-between, as an ersatz pair of {{w|pliers}}. The amount of force on the two screwdriver shafts needed to turn the hex bolt and maintain the 'grip' will probably exceed the strength of human hands — the attempt would most likely only result in causing your hands to cramp or causing the screwdrivers to slip and cause further injury. The title text is making a play on the phrase "you can try", which normally implies something with a reasonable chance of success, but here is only pointing out "just because you ''can'' doesn't mean you should".
It marks a variation on the idea that "{{w|Law of the instrument|when all you have is a hammer}}, everything looks like a nail", as also exemplified by the common tendency for cutting-pliers to be used to grip things or gripping pliers to be used to try to flex-shear objects, just because one tool is more immediately at hand than a more correct one. But, in this case, it seems that multiple screwdrivers are available. Whether or not any of these are strictly suitable for all actually encountered screw-heads (as above), here something that is definitely ''not'' actually a screw-head still "looks like one" and forces a gross improvisation in leiu of any of the more suitable tools that should really be used — including an ''external'' hex socket of a suitable size. 
|}

==Transcript==
:[Eight drawings of different types of heads each with a caption:]
:[Plus sign-shaped screw.]
:Phillips head
:[Minus sign-shaped screw.]
:Flat head
:[Star-shaped screw.]
:Uh oh. Maybe it's on Amazon?
:[Plus sign-shaped screw with worn edges.]
:Cursed -1 Phillips head
:[No screw, just a circle.]
:Crap, it's a ''rivet''.
:[Hexagon-shaped screw.]
:Phillips-head ruiner
:[Minus sign-shaped screw going through the whole circle. Also giving off radiation.]
:Uranium screw (a real thing)
:[A sack with blood oozing out of it.]
:Phillip's head

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with blood]]
[[Category:Comics with cursed items]] <!-- Worn screw-head -->