Editing 1997: Business Update
Warning: You are not logged in. Your IP address will be publicly visible if you make any edits. If you log in or create an account, your edits will be attributed to your username, along with other benefits.
The edit can be undone.
Please check the comparison below to verify that this is what you want to do, and then save the changes below to finish undoing the edit.
| Latest revision | Your text | ||
| Line 10: | Line 10: | ||
This comic shows a meeting at [[Beret Guy]]'s business (as seen in [[:Category:Beret Guy's Business|these other comics]]). As usual, those in the business demonstrate a misuse of business terminology and take strange happenings within the business in their stride. | This comic shows a meeting at [[Beret Guy]]'s business (as seen in [[:Category:Beret Guy's Business|these other comics]]). As usual, those in the business demonstrate a misuse of business terminology and take strange happenings within the business in their stride. | ||
| β | Though maintaining a semblance of business-savviness through the use of many corporate buzzwords, it becomes clear that what is normally metaphorical in a usual boardroom meeting is here are quite likely meant literally. The Quarterly Reports, described as "looking good," may be literally physically attractive (rather than recording successful business dealings). Beret Guy's comment that "the office is full of cash" seems to be an ordinary comment at a | + | Though maintaining a semblance of business-savviness through the use of many corporate buzzwords, it becomes clear that what is normally metaphorical in a usual boardroom meeting is here are quite likely meant literally. The Quarterly Reports, described as "looking good," may be literally physically attractive (rather than recording successful business dealings). Beret Guy's comment that "the office is full of cash" seems to be an ordinary comment at a glace, but him saying that the office ''contains'' a lot of money instead of ''has'' a lot of money implies that the office is literally full of money, like coins, dollar bills, twenty dollar bills, etc., and not simply economically well-off. Most businesses keep their money in banks; any business that keeps all their money insecurely in the office is either criminally shady or incompetent. |
"We're producing stocks [as in the stock market, a.k.a. shares] faster than ever before." Stocks are valuable, so from an outside perspective making more of them would create value. However, the humor of this situation is that in real life, creating shares from nothing would reduce the value of existing shares (as the combined value of stocks should add up to the total value of the company...so creating more stocks means each has to be worth less to make the addition balance out). This is ironic in that typically stocks represent the value of the company, rather than being the product being created. | "We're producing stocks [as in the stock market, a.k.a. shares] faster than ever before." Stocks are valuable, so from an outside perspective making more of them would create value. However, the humor of this situation is that in real life, creating shares from nothing would reduce the value of existing shares (as the combined value of stocks should add up to the total value of the company...so creating more stocks means each has to be worth less to make the addition balance out). This is ironic in that typically stocks represent the value of the company, rather than being the product being created. | ||
| Line 20: | Line 20: | ||
"Liquidating assets" typically means that assets are being sold off for money rather than being retained or used. Assets "liquidated" in a thermostat glitch, meanwhile, may have been literally melted ("turned into liquid"). It could also mean that their infrastructure is so hilariously messed up (and/or the assets so bizarre) that a simple glitch in a thermostat somehow resulted in the loss of a large amount of the company's assets. Note that this type of thing is not entirely unheard of, as shown by [https://thehackernews.com/2018/04/iot-hacking-thermometer.html a hack of a thermostat in a casino that led to massive data loss in 2017]. | "Liquidating assets" typically means that assets are being sold off for money rather than being retained or used. Assets "liquidated" in a thermostat glitch, meanwhile, may have been literally melted ("turned into liquid"). It could also mean that their infrastructure is so hilariously messed up (and/or the assets so bizarre) that a simple glitch in a thermostat somehow resulted in the loss of a large amount of the company's assets. Note that this type of thing is not entirely unheard of, as shown by [https://thehackernews.com/2018/04/iot-hacking-thermometer.html a hack of a thermostat in a casino that led to massive data loss in 2017]. | ||
| β | "Original content" is a catch-all term for unique creative products created by a website, e.g. articles, videos or TV shows. However, it is not typically used to describe sinks, which only provide water. Since the business team regards it as a problem, this means the sink is likely leaking or backing up, possibly with polluted water or rotting food waste, or perhaps creating things one would not expect a sink to dispense or even to exist (depending on how "original" this original content is) | + | "Original content" is a catch-all term for unique creative products created by a website, e.g. articles, videos or TV shows. However, it is not typically used to describe sinks, which only provide water. Since the business team regards it as a problem, this means the sink is likely leaking or backing up, possibly with polluted water or rotting food waste, or perhaps creating things one would not expect a sink to dispense or even to exist (depending on how "original" this original content is). |
Transmuting lead into gold was a {{w|Nuclear transmutation#Alchemy|goal of alchemists}} for many centuries. With modern nuclear technology, it is actually now possible to accomplish transmutation of lead into gold, and gold into lead. While the expense far exceeds the value of the gold produced by such methods, it seems plausible that, given Beret Guy's surpassing strangeness, his company may be successfully and cheaply transmuting large quantities of lead into gold and back again. Since gold is worth much more than lead in today's market, the first transmutation could indeed result in major profit, while the reverse would obviously result in major losses, and be a rather pointless undertaking for a typical, profit-oriented business. | Transmuting lead into gold was a {{w|Nuclear transmutation#Alchemy|goal of alchemists}} for many centuries. With modern nuclear technology, it is actually now possible to accomplish transmutation of lead into gold, and gold into lead. While the expense far exceeds the value of the gold produced by such methods, it seems plausible that, given Beret Guy's surpassing strangeness, his company may be successfully and cheaply transmuting large quantities of lead into gold and back again. Since gold is worth much more than lead in today's market, the first transmutation could indeed result in major profit, while the reverse would obviously result in major losses, and be a rather pointless undertaking for a typical, profit-oriented business. | ||
