Editing 2794: Alphabet Notes

This comic is Randall's "design notes" for the {{w|English alphabet}}. The comic lists the A-to-Z alphabet, in black block letters, from left to right. Forming these supposed design notes are many red annotations:

At the top, Randall lists the vowels and appreciates how they are spaced. At the end of the list, he uses a question mark to indicate the ambiguous nature of '''Y''', which can function both as a vowel and a consonant depending on the context.

| rowspan="5" |"Decent consonants but no real heavy hitters here in the first third ("D" is solid, at least)"

| rowspan="5" |Randall considers the five early consonants '''B''', '''C''', '''D''', '''F''', and '''G''' to be acceptable but nothing special, with the exception of '''D''' which he considers solid. It's not clear whether he specifically is referring to their appearance or what sound they represent. In English phonology, '''D''' is the {{w|voiced alveolar plosive}}.

| rowspan="2" |Randall notes and appreciates the shared tittle (dot) in the lowercase letters '''i''' and '''j''', calling them "friends". The separate dots and main strokes could also be interpreted as the heads and torsos of two reductionist character drawings. The two letters are the respective mathematical and electrical-engineering notations of the {{w|Imaginary unit|square root of -1}}, and so may be considered both professionally and personally in a close relationship, as well as neighbours. In the Netherlands, a {{w|digraph}}, or two letters representing one sound (such as "CH" and "SH" in English) is formed from '''I''' and '''J''', creating '''IJ'''; it is considered distinct from either '''I''' or '''J'''. It should be noted that '''J''' {{w|J#History|appeared sometime around the Middle Ages}} as a variant of '''I''', explaining why they look similar and are located together in the alphabet.

| rowspan="2" |Randall finds it weird that the dividing line between the two halves of the alphabet would go between '''M''' and '''N'''. Indeed, it is a bit odd that the two letters, which look similar and represent similar sounds, are placed in such a way that they would be split apart when the alphabet is written out on two lines. He also lists several words that contain '''MN''' in sequence and speculates on the significance of this rare digram seemingly only being used for "fancy" words.

|Randall considers '''Q''' strange, likely because the sound it denotes in English could be replaced with the sequence "KW". The modern English alphabet evolved from the {{w|Phoenician alphabet}}, where the letter '''Q''' represented a {{w|voiceless uvular plosive}}, a sound similar to /k/ but with the tongue pushed back. Even though the Greeks, Latins, French, and eventually the English didn't have this sound in their languages, they kept the letter '''Q''' because Arabic numerals hadn't been adopted yet and '''Q''' was employed to represent the number 90. Other letters can be replaced by a similar combination of letters, but they aren't mentioned by Randall. For example, '''C''' can be replaced with '''K''' or '''S''', and '''X''' can be spelt as "KS".

| rowspan="3" |Randall considers '''RST''' a strong cluster of consonants, though again it is unclear whether he refers to their visual design or in the sounds they represent. The use of an {{w|R-S-T system|RST code}} is a traditional way of describing the reception quality of radio communications. Also, '''RST''' are part of the widely recognized five most common consonants in the English language, RSTLN. Three out of the five are listed together in the alphabet.

|The comment that the alphabet may have been better if it had stopped at '''T''' is potential a reference to the fact that the original Phoenician script, which is the ancestor of many modern scripts including English, had as its last letter {{w|Taw}}, which the modern letter '''T''' is derived from. It is still the last letter of the modern Hebrew alphabet, although the Greek alphabet added several letters after it, some of which persist into modern English. Randall seems to believe that the Phoenician script was fine as-is and that the letters U-Z are unnecessary or "haunted".

|Randall is not a fan of the letter '''U''' and thinks it is the weirdest of the five vowels.

| rowspan="2" |Randall seems to be confused about '''VW'''. Possible confusion stems from the fact that that '''W''' is called "double '''U'''" rather than "double '''V'''". Both '''{{w|W#History|W}}''' and '''{{w|U#History|U}}''' are derived from '''V''', which might explain a lot. He may also be confused as to why {{w|Volkswagen|a make of car}} is appearing in the alphabet.

|Randall questions whether '''X''' is even a letter. As Randall is a physicist, it is likely he is referring to how the letter is likely encountered more often as a variable representing a number in mathematics and algebra than as a letter for scientists. Alternatively, he could be referring to the Roman numeral X, though he doesn't apparently have this kind of issue with I, V, L, D or M.

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:YZ:...Listen.