Difference between revisions of "UniXKCD"

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
Jump to: navigation, search
(Reverted vandalism with User:CRLF/OneClickUndo.js)
(Reverted edit by anti-crap user)
Line 1: Line 1:
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On {{w|April_Fools%27_Day|April Fools' Day}} in 2010 [[Randall]] altered the website to mimic a {{w|Unix}} command line interface. This interface is still available on [https://uni.xkcd.com uni.xkcd.com] and the source code is available on [https://github.com/chromakode/xkcdfools GitHub].
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crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap 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The comic [[721: Flatland]] which was released on March 31, 2010 was still up on April 1st, 2010, but had in it self nothing to do with the Unix interface or the April Fools' Day joke of that interface.
 
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This Unix interface is thus in itself not one of Randall's [[:Category:April fools' comics|April fools' comics]], but since also the not existing comic [[404: Not Found]] is listed in that category, this stunt is none the less listed under these comics.
 
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'''The terminal lists a few available commands:'''
 
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* <code>next</code> shows the next comic. Shows the error "Time travel mode not enabled" on the last comic (see <code>enable time travel</code>).
 
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* <code>prev</code> shows the previous comic.
 
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* <code>first</code> shows the first comic.
 
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* <code>last</code> shows the last comic.
 
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* <code>display [number]</code> shows the comic with the specified number.
 
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* <code>random</code> shows a random comic.
 
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* <code>ls</code> shows the content of the current directory.
 
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* <code>cat [filename]</code> shows the content of the file, or "You're a kitty!" if [filename] is left blank.
 
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* <code>cd [directory]</code> changes to the specified directory.
 
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'''But there are several undocumented commands as well:'''
 
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* <code>:(){:|:&};:</code> This command, otherwise known as a [https://askubuntu.com/questions/159491/why-did-the-command-make-my-system-lag-so-badly-i-had-to-reboot shell fork bomb] will make the terminal display the <code>[. . .]</code> loading text indefinitely, as though it crashed.
 
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* <code>a/s/l</code> [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=a%2Fs%2Fl A/S/L] is not a unix command, but an acronym of Age/Sex/Location. The following replies are possible:
 
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: <code>2/AMD64/Server Rack</code> answered as if the server replied.
 
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: <code>328/M/Transylvania</code> answered by {{w|Dracula}}.
 
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: <code>6/M/Battle School</code> answered by {{w|Ender Wiggin}} or another boy from battle school.
 
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: <code>48/M/The White House</code> answered by {{w|Barack Obama}} or another male of the same age in the White House.
 
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: <code>7/F/Rapture</code> answered by a {{w|Little_Sister_(BioShock)|Little Sister}} from {{w|BioShock}}.
 
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: <code>Exactly your age/A gender you're attracted to/Far far away.</code> Requests for a/s/l are often not answered truthfully, but crafted to suit the one asking the question.
 
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: <code>7,831/F/Lothlórien</code> answered by {{w|Galadriel}} or another elf.
 
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: <code>42/M/FBI Field Office</code> answered by an FBI agent (referencing the old [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ThereAreNoGirlsOnTheInternet trope] that all girls on the internet are FBI agents impersonating them).
 
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* <code>apt-get</code> replies "This APT has Super Cow Powers.". The <code>apt-get</code> command is part of the Debian package manager {{w|Advanced_Packaging_Tool|APT}}. This reply is one of the build in Easter eggs.
 
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* <code>apt-get moo</code> replies "Have you mooed today" with an ascii cow.
 
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* <code>asl</code> same as <code>a/s/l</code>.
 
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* <code>bash</code> replies "You bash your head against the wall. It's not very effective.". {{w|Bash}} is a shell for POSIX-based systems.
 
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* <code>buy stuff</code> same as <code>cd store</code>.
 
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* <code>cat [number]/alt.txt</code> displays the alt-text of the specified comic.
 
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* <code>cat</code> (without a filename) will show "You're a kitty!" referencing [[231: Cat Proximity]].
 
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* <code>cheat</code> promotes the [https://store.xkcd.com/ xkcd store].
 
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* <code>clear</code> clears the screen.
 
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* <code>curl</code> creates an iframe to the URL specified
 
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* <code>date</code> replies "March 32nd".
 
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* <code>dir</code> same as <code>ls</code>.
 
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* <code>echo</code> replies "Echo ... echo ... echo ...". The {{w|Echo_(command)|echo}} command is used to print text to the terminal.
 
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* <code>ed</code> replies "You are not a diety ''[sic]''.". {{w|Ed_(text_editor)|ed}} is a very simple text editor. It is usually not considered very user friendly (see also <code>vi</code> and <code>emacs</code>).
 
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* <code>emacs</code> replies "You should really use vim.". References [[378: Real Programmers]].
 
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* <code>enable time travel</code> replies "TARDIS error: Time Lord missing.". A {{w|Doctor Who}} reference. See also the <code>next</code> command.
 
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* <code>exit</code> will end the terminal session.
 
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* <code>find kitten</code> showed the {{w|robotfindskitten}} game (the link to the Flash version no longer works, but an HTML version is available [http://robotfindskitten.org/play/robotfindskitten/ here]).
 
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* <code>find</code> replies "What do you want to find? Kitten would be nice.".
 
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* <code>finger</code> replies "Mmmmmm...".
 
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* <code>fuck</code> replies "I have a headache.".
 
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* <code>goto [any]</code> shows comic [[292: goto]] and asks if you meant <code>display</code> instead.
 
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* <code>halp</code> same as <code>help</code>.
 
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* <code>hello joshua</code> replies "How about a nice game of Global Thermonuclear War?". A reference to the {{w|WarGames}} movie.
 
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* <code>hello</code> replies "Hello.". There is a second reply "Why hello there!" coded, but it is never used.
 
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* <code>help</code> says "That would be cheating!".
 
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* <code>hi</code> replies "Hi.".
 
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* <code>hint</code> randomly replies "We offer some really nice polos.", "This terminal will remain available at xkcd.com/unixkcd/", "Use the source, Luke!" or "There are cheat codes.".
 
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* <code>i read the source code</code> replies "<3".
 
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* <code>irc [nick]</code> starts an {{w|IRC}} session on the xkcd channel on irc.foonetic.net.
 
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* <code>kill</code> replies "Terminator deployed to 1984.". A reference to the {{w|The_Terminator|Terminator}} movie. In Bash, <code>kill</code> is used to end a process.
 
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* <code>locate [filename]</code> is normally used to locate a file in a directory. It will give humorous results when searching for <code>ninja</code>, <code>keys</code>, <code>joke</code>, <code>problem</code> and <code>raptor</code>.
 
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* <code>logout</code> same as <code>exit</code>.
 
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* <code>lpr</code> replies "PC LOAD LETTER". {{w|Line_Printer_Daemon_protocol|lpr}} is a command to print documents. {{w|PC_LOAD_LETTER}} is a printer error.
 
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* <code>make love</code> replies "I put on my robe and wizard hat.". A reference to this [http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/bloodninja roleplay chat transscript] (NSFW), also mentioned in [[442: xkcd Loves the Discovery Channel]]. <code>make love</code> is a standard unix joke, because the reply is "make: don't know how to make love.".
 
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* <code>make me a sandwich</code> behaves like [[149: Sandwich]].
 
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* <code>man [command]</code> show unhelpful information about the command (only <code>last</code>, <code>help</code>, <code>next</code>, <code>cat</code> or no command are supported).
 
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* <code>moo</code> replies "moo".
 
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* <code>more</code> replies "Oh, yes! More! More!". The {{w|More_(command)|more}} command is used to paginate output.
 
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* <code>nano</code> replies "Seriously? Why don't you just use Notepad.exe? Or MS Paint?". {{w|GNU_nano|Nano}} is another text editor for Unix systems (see <code>vi</code> and <code>emacs</code>).
 
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* <code>ping</code> replies "There is another submarine three miles ahead, bearing 225, forty fathoms down.". The {{w|Ping_(networking_utility)|ping}} command used to measure round trip times to a destination. The name does indeed originate from {{w|sonar}} technology.
 
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* <code>pwd</code> replies "You are in a maze of twisty passages, all alike.". The {{w|pwd}} command prints the current working directory (see <code>look</code>).
 
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* <code>quit</code> same as <code>exit</code>.
 
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* <code>reddit [number]</code> shows the [https://www.reddit.com/ Reddit] voting bar for the specified comic (or xkcd when no number is specified).
 
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* <code>rm [filename]</code> will make it seem like you deleted the file. (rm -rf / will break all commands until the page is reloaded)
 
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* <code>serenity</code> replies "You can't take the sky from me.". This is a line from the Balad of Serenity from the {{w|Firefly_(TV_series)|Firefly}} TV series.
 
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* <code>ssh</code> replies "ssh, this is a library.". {{w|Secure_Shell|ssh}} is the command to start a secure shell, but it also resembles the "{{w|Shh}}" sound.
 
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* <code>su</code> replies "God mode activated. Remember, with great power comes great ... aw, screw it, go have fun.". The {{w|Su_(Unix)|su}} command is used to log in as super user, which gives you full and potentionally dangerous access to the system.
 
−
* <code>sudo [command]</code> executes the command with {{w|Superuser|root}}  privileges.
 
−
* <code>sudo apt-get dist-upgrade</code> Returns "You are already running [OS].".
 
−
* <code>sudo apt-get moo</code> replies "Have you mooed today?" (apt-get Easter egg).
 
−
* <code>sudo apt-get update</code> Refreshes the package list so the system knows which updates are available.
 
−
* <code>sudo apt-get upgrade</code> shows a link to [http://abetterbrowser.org/ A Better Browser] on Internet Explorer and Firefox (< v3). On all other browsers it doesn't complain.
 
−
* <code>sudo make me a sandwich</code> behave like [[149: Sandwich]].
 
−
* <code>sudo !!</code> will sudo the last command.
 
−
* <code>sudo poweroff</code> will shutdown the system.
 
−
* <code>sudo reboot</code> will restart the system.
 
−
* <code>sudo restart</code> same as <code>sudo reboot</code>.
 
−
* <code>sudo shutdown</code> same as <code>sudo poweroff</code>.
 
−
* <code>time travel</code> displays [[630: Time Travel]].
 
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* <code>top</code> replies "It's up there --^". The {{w|Top_(software)|top}} command shows a table of processes. Here it is taken literally.
 
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* <code>uname</code> replies "Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator". The Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator is an explosive device created by Marvin the Martian in the {{w|Looney Tunes}} series.
 
−
* <code>unixkcd</code> opens a new terminal window.
 
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* <code>use the force luke</code> replies "I believe you mean source.". A reference to the {{w|The_Force_(Star_Wars)|Force}} in the {{w|Star Wars}} franchise.
 
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* <code>use the source luke</code> replies "I'm not luke, you're luke!", an old programmers' joke.
 
−
* <code>vi</code> reply "You should really use emacs.". References [[378: Real Programmers]].
 
−
* <code>vim</code> same as <code>vi</code>.
 
−
* <code>wget [url]</code> shows the content of the specified url. The {{w|wget}} command on unix will download the content and not show it.
 
−
* <code>who</code> replies "Doctor Who?". Another {{w|Doctor Who}} reference.
 
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* <code>whoami</code> replies "You are Richard Stallman.". The {{w|whoami}} command lists the name of the current user.
 
−
* <code>write [nick]</code> same as <code>irc</code>.
 
−
* <code>xkcd</code> replies "Yes?".
 
−
* <code>xyzzy</code> replies "Nothing happens.". {{w|Xyzzy_(computing)|xyzzy}} is a magic word, originally used in the {{w|Colossal Cave Adventure}}.
 
−
* <code>your gay</code> replies "Keep your hands off it!".
 
−
 
 
−
;Other commands
 
−
* There are also some other commands borrowed from a {{w|Zork}} like {{w|Text-based_game|text based adventure game}}.
 
−
* <code>look</code> describes your current surroundings.
 
−
* <code>go [direction]</code> moves you in the specified direction (<code>down</code> is also supported; however, it replies a different message).
 
−
* <code>light lamp</code> lights your lamp.
 
−
* <code>sleep [seconds]</code> sleeps for the specified time. Without specifying, the nap is 5 seconds.
 
−
**You will be killed by a {{w|Grue_(monster)|grue}} if you didn't light your lamp when going south.
 
−
**Going west repeatedly will list the refrain from the song {{w|Go_West_(song)|Go west}}.
 
−
 
 
−
'''Konami code:'''
 
−
* The terminal also responds to the {{w|Konami code}} Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A. Entering this code repeatedly will transform all characters to upper case, add a gray text shadow, add an orange text shadow, shake the screen and add a background image of Richard Stallman from [[345: 1337: Part 5]].
 
−
 
 
−
 
 
−
[[Category:April fools' comics]]
 

Revision as of 17:05, 26 May 2022

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crap

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