Editing 3175: Website Task Flowchart

{{comic
| number    = 3175
| date      = December 1, 2025
| title     = Website Task Flowchart
| image     = website_task_flowchart_2x.png
| imagesize = 333x683px
| noexpand  = true
| titletext = Tired of waiting on hold? Use our website to chat with one of our live agents, who are available to produce words at you 24/7!
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|This page was created by a live agent producing words at you. Don't remove this notice too soon.}}
This is a flowchart comic. It ostensibly shows how to accomplish a task on a generic website.

The first step as listed in the flowchart is to attempt to log into the website. In all cases this would include pulling up the website, which could fail if the website itself is having issues. Once the home page is visible, the next step (in some cases as not all websites require logging in) would be to sign in by entering your username and password, which could fail if you enter an incorrect username and/or password or if the website is having problems with their authentication coding such that even legitimate username/password combinations are being rejected.  Troubleshooting could include visiting a website such as https://www.isitdownrightnow.com/ to see if the problem is widespread or if you're the only one having the issue, double-checking your username/password, googling the specific error message you're seeing, if applicable, or seeing if anyone else is having the same problem you're having, however the flowchart provides no guidance as to the actual troubleshooting involved, likely because the specific steps would vary greatly depending on the specific problem being encountered, and the personality of the individual this flowchart is likely aimed at being one who, like Randall, has a need to figure out why things aren't working and hates to resort to talking to someone unless absolutely necessary.

If you finally get it working and are able to get to the area you were trying to get to to do that task you were trying to do, the next part of the flowchart asks if the task was successful. Being unsuccessful could include unintentional website issues (i.e. bugs) or simply that the website doesn't have the tools to accomplish the specific task you are trying to accomplish. Troubleshooting could include steps like above as well as things like trying to use those tools that ARE available in alternate or creative ways to try to accomplish your intended task.

If you have managed to both log in and do your work (perhaps eventually, see below), its last stage is merely a congratulatory message. At this point, you have succeeded in the task that the flowchart was supposedly helping you to complete.

It is when you have problems that the flowchart gives you the additional instructions. In both the case of being unable to log in ''and'' being unable to do the whatever-it-is that you're trying to do, the chart guides you to the perhaps just as unhelpful troubleshooting directive for the respective issue. In line with the generalist brevity of the other instructions, this merely consists of the instruction to troubleshoot the issue, without providing any actual guidance as to what specific approaches to take in that troubleshooting. The only concession given to the complexity that might be involved is that it explicitly states that you will have to spend several hours doing this (without any actual indication what it is that you'll be doing for several hours). Following which, each diversion queries whether any of whatever-you-did worked. The good news, if that all did work out in the end, is that you've now back on the the path that ultimately leads to the trite congratulations for being successful.

However, failing either troubleshooting dumps you into a "give up"-themed flow, sending you down the route of calling the Customer Service line. This proceeds to uphold exactly the same standards of helpfulness as the rest of the flowchart, by intoducing you to the inevitable '{{w|On hold messaging|hold message}}' which it fully expects (probably correctly) to contain an automated suggestion that you try to use the website ''instead'' of calling them directly.  While that message probably is helpful for anyone who called the support line BEFORE trying the website, it assumes their website is working properly and that all tasks a person might want to do can be accomplished via the website so it is like kicking you when you're already down to hear that "advice" after spending hours trying to use a website that simply would not work for what you were trying to do.

As, by now, you have probably been wrestling with the website already for several hours, the flowchart does not actually present any proper 'advice', merely the prediction that the entire frustrating episode will then have you throwing both computer and the phone handset away, before even hearing the full message. Specifically, into the sea, which is a drastic and non-trivial action to take, as you would be wasting devices which may cost over $1,000 each. It should at least, however, formally end this attempt to accomplish your troublesome task upon the troublesome website.

The title text is yet another part of the typical automated support-line message, perhaps for anyone who had not followed the flowchart as faithfully. In this further recorded suggestion, you may be encouraged to visit the website's 'live chat' function, a fairly recent development that combines the best/worst<sup>&#91;delete as inapplicable&#93;</sup> aspects of both online and phone-line support. "Live agents" is an ambiguous term, ''possibly'' being true support-line staff with all the answers to your questions. However, as it often leverages the ambiguity of typed-text communications, it often remains ambiguous as to whether you have a single (and qualified) person assisting you, the conversation may well be passed around various rather less than knowledgeable staff who are merely following a 'script' that follows a flowchart process (hopefully more useful than this one) to let them give more expert advice than they might be capable of. Or, increasingly, an automated/AI text-processing backend that attempts to understand your queries and follows a similar script-based rabbit-hole towards whatever conclusion it is capable of (including {{wiktionary|triage|triaging}} your initial responses before even allowing 'a real human', with the necessary skills, to be bothered by your request).

The claim that they can "produce words at you" might be {{w|English as a second or foreign language|slightly mangled English}}, or a blatantly honest admission that any conversation you have will be with {{w|Large language model|a potentially inexaustible AI system}}, which websites have increasingly utilized in place of customer service representatives since 2024. At its worst, the words you receive might have {{w|Markov chain|even less understanding}} of your problem, as merely being able to send even [[1068: Swiftkey|vaguely logical sequences of words]] might be worse than useless. Additionally, giving random vague sequences of words would be very infuriating and cause the user to throw the laptop into the ocean.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Don't remove this notice too soon.}}
[Caption above the panel:]
Doing a task using a company or organization's website:

[Below this is a flowchart, starting with "Go to website, try to log in"]

[Box 1 (start):] Go to website, try to log in (go to to box 2)

[Box 2:] Did it work? (Yes/No)
*Yes: Go to box 3
*No: Go to box 6

[Box 3:] Try to do your task (go to box 4)

[Box 4:] Did it work? (Yes/No)
*Yes: Go to box 5
*No: Go to box 8

[Box 5 (end):] Nice! Done!

[Box 6:] Spend hours troubleshooting account/login (go to box 7)

[Box 7:] Did it work? (Yes/No)
*Yes: Go to box 3
*No: Go to box 10

[Box 8:] Spend hours troubleshooting website (go to box 9)

[Box 9:] Did it work? (Yes/No)
*Yes: Go to box 5
*No: Go to box 10

[Box 10:] Give up and call customer service (go to box 11)

[Box 11:] Hold message: "Did you know you could do all of this more quickly and easily on our website? Just go to W-W-W dot..." (go to box 12)

[Box 12 (end):] Throw phone and laptop into the sea
{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Flowcharts]]
[[Category:Internet]]