Difference between revisions of "1350: Lorenz/Transcript"

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.

Jump to: navigation, search

Latest revision as of 14:03, 21 June 2025

This is the complete transcript for the dynamic comic 1350: Lorenz, formatted following a tree structure, as you can see from the table of contents below. A permalink is provided for every panel, at least at the end of a comic, as not all the storylines that were available originally are available today. Note that, if there are more than four choices, a permalink is not enough to get to the first panel of that chain. Similarly, the choices you have when you choose a permalink won't come in the same order. To be certain to have all choices, there are permalinks on all steps of a story tree.

Knit Cap:

[Typing on the laptop and thinking.]

(Permalink)

1 Refresh Branch
2 Stupid Tiles Branch
3 Political Thing Branch
4 BSD Branch
5 Facebook Branch
6 Gravity Branch

Refresh Branch

Refresh... No new email... Refresh... No new tweets... Refresh... (Permalink)

:[Hairy walks in] Hairy:

So you're still refusing to use Facebook?

(Permalink)

[A green dinosaur appears]

Dinosaur:

I will not submit to peer pressure... Wait I should tweet that, hold on.

(Permalink)

[Zooming in on the dinosaur's head]

Dinosaur:

[Zooming in on the dinosaur's head]

Dinosaur:

Go analog, dog

(Permalink)

Memes are becoming memes themselves

(Permalink)

And judging from their profile pictures, Facebook causes the newly married to turn into infants

(Permalink)

They make me so hungry.

(Permalink)

That's right, kids! Now you can have your very own Facebook page!

(Permalink)

[Zooming in on the dinosaur's head]

Dinosaur:

Narcissism has never been this easy! Back in my day, we had to maually brag about every minor event in our life all over town!

(Permalink)

It makes all your in-person social interactions more awkward!

(Permalink)

Become a retro hipster before everyone else by adopting the most mainstream fad!

(Permalink)

Now let's take this crossover to the next level!

(Permalink)

I am Facebooksaurus!

(Permalink)

[Zooming in on the dinosaur's head]

Dinosaur:

I will swallow your personal data!

(Permalink)

...of genus Socialnetworkus.

(Permalink)

I fear the existential ambiguity of irreconcilable proclivities in prepetuity!

(Permalink)

And I am two social outlets from being a hipster.

(Permalink)

Wanna build a snowman?

(Permalink)

Hey. I hear Godot is in town. Wanna try to meet him?

(Permalink)

Did you get my e-mail yet?

This branch was complete as of 2014-05-01.

(Permalink)

[They leave]

Knit Cap:

Yeah, I'm thinking Thai for lunch

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks out of the building - continue - Hairy looks into a hole in the ground]

Hairy:

Has this hole always been here?

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

I think I see lizard people

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-22.)

Because I'm not sure it's entirely safe.

(Permalink)

[They walk on]

Knit Cap:

Nothing ever is

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy: Suggest a line…
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-04-22.)

Russia is invading countries. North Korea is testing nukes… And you're worried about a small hole?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-22.)

Suggest a Line…

I don't know if actually going to Thailand is necessary…

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-22.)

Is it common for Thai businesses to have rooftop access?

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking] Knit Cap:

Yeah. Except over there, it's floor access, since everything is upside-down

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Did you know the little prince lives just over there?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

You don't get out a lot do you?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

You've never been to Thailand, have you?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

There's a small crack in the pavement

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap thinks]

Knit Cap:

Didn't he get my e-mail about parkour?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap:

Why didn't you tuck roll over that cravass?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

How did you not notice until we were up on the roof?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

You were supposed to do a double rebound off the small crack!

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

I picked this route because of the cracks in the pavement.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Suggest a line…

The one with the cats of the one about geocaching in the Pentagon?

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks out of the building - continue - They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

I hope it's open. Otherwise we'll just have to resort to those cat videos.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Either way we're getting on a watch-list.

(Permalink)

Hairy:

I have the funny feeling that you've been on one for some time.

(Permalink) - only Feeling that you've been on one for some time. can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[Knit Cap thinks]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Glad I brought the good GPS. …And a taser.

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-22.)

Everyone knows that stuff is fake. Snopes proved it.

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-22.)

I'm already on six. Two more and I get cake and a swat team sent to my house

(Permalink) - only Cake and a swat team sent to my house can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-22.)

So are we really doing this?

(Permalink)

Hairy:

I'm not sure. How good are you rappelling skills?

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "ink cloud"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Yes. There are cats in that geocache. Damnit.

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Graph Theory"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Sure. We spent almost all the bitcoins we got on kickstarter for this. It better work

(Permalink) - only Kickstarter for this. It better work can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "theft"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

How else can we say that we pentagulated the location of something?

(Permalink) ]) - only Pentagulated the location of something? can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[Hairy looks into a hole in the ground ]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

I don't care what anyone says- Donuts are not a valid breakfast choice.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

Yes. You didn't see me reply burned into the lawn?

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks out of the building - continue - They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

See? It’s right there!

(Permalink)

Hairy:

You’ve been hanging out with the man in the black hat again, haven’t you?

(Permalink) - only the man in the black hat again, haven’t you? can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-01.)

Guess Google Maps hasn’t updated.

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Graph Theory"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Huh. My cellphone should have buzzed.

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Radicality"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

…Really? Just 'K' ? That seems like a lot of effort.

(Permalink)

[They walk under a tree]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

So I guess we’re married now?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Maybe my font size was too big.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

It took a lot of gasoline

(Permalink)

Hairy:

I’m both impressed and terrified.

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

You realize my email was about the environment

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap] Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Abandonment"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line... (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

When did you do this? You’ve been inside last week.

(Permalink) - only This? You’ve been inside last week. can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line...

Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

How many cars did you empty of fuel?

(Permalink)

[They walk under a tree]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Gmail must be down. Let's check it out.

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks out of the building - continue - Hairy looks into a hole in the ground]

Hairy:

It’s that hell’s light?

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks on]

Knit Cap:

Why else would there be a gaping hole in the ground?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

Nope. Just Carl Gustav Horn talking about evangelion till his audience spontaneously combsted.

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Ethylene dichloride"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-04-22.)

I hope not. Disco parties would be the last temptation Satan needs to use to win.

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

I thought Gmail was around the corner.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

How long are you willing to keep walking for?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

How long until the internet’s working again?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

If nothing else this proves the time dilation effects don’t matter

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Nah, just the google internships ghetto.

(Permalink)

[Hairy again looks into a hole in the ground ]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

I wonder what’s down there

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

Remember that chain email about the hole to hell in Russia?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

Hey, you, what is down there?

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks on]

Knit Cap:

Satan doesn’t like to be called "you". He prefers "you bastard" or "you devil".

(Permalink)

[They walk under a tree]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Ever heard the phrase curiosity killed the cat?

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Would you be more or less afraid is someone had responded?

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

No wonder Gmail is down, someone cut their fiber!

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

Want to take a look?

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

I bet it’s just an outlet from the city of Ember

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

When they talk about the singularity, I dion’t think they mean google servers undergoing gravitational collapse!

(Permalink ) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Jules Vernes probably already discovered all the interesting stiff anyway

(Permalink ) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

That sounds dangerous, but I’m feeling sort of risk-takey right now.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

I think I can see my house from here

(Permalink)

[They walk on]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Isn’t that Sergey Brin down there?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap:

You didn’t feed him this week?!

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Google was inside us all along

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Where’s his wife???

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Suggest a line…

How long do you think he’ll keep digging?

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

With a name like Doug, it’s impossible to say

(Permalink)

Hairy:

"Doug" is not impossible to say I just did

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Anguish"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Pre-nominative destination is a cruel thing.

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-01.)

Double impossible if he owns a Buick.

(Permalink)

[Hairy again looks into a hole in the ground]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Suggest a line…

Sometimes no answer is the answer

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

He’ll keep digging as long as I keep dropping sandwiches on him

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

Do you think he’s lonely?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-01.)

You know. Your car's on fire.

(Permalink)

Stupid Tiles Branch

These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game.

(Permalink)

[Hairy visits Knit Cap.]
Hairy:

There's something weird out on the lawn.

(Permalink)

[They leave]

Knit Cap:

This is an apartment. We don't have a lawn.

This branch was complete as of 2014-05-30.

(Permalink)

[The two characters walks out of the building - continue - Hairy looks into a hole in the ground]

Hairy:

OK, two weird things.

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

Who tiled the moat?

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

Seems costly

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line…
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-28).

And aren't those all primes?

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-28.)

Was it that guy with a hat again?

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line…
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-28).

And how can you float in the air like this?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-28.)

Maybe three.

(Permalink)

[They walk under a tree]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-28.)

I think I see cats down there

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-28.)

On an unrelated note: Don't look down the hole.

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line…
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-28).

I can see a creeper down there

(Permalink)

[They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

These videogames are really encroaching on my life.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Damn Griefers

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

So this is what the outside world is like.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Good source of gunpowder

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Is this 1-1 from Mario?

(Permalink)

[They walk under a tree]

Hairy:

Why does that tree looks fake?

(Permalink)

[Continues three images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Theft"!

It's not very effective ...

[One more picture but this time the Pokémon speaks]

Pikachu: Um...

Narrator: ...

[Hairy and Knit Cap stands in front of the Pokémon in tall grass]:

Pikachu:

Do you come here often?

(Permalink)

[Hairy and Knit Cap walks past the Pokémon]:

Pikachu: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

I wish I was president of France

(Permalink)

[Hairy and Knit Cap walks past the Pokémon]:

Pikachu: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Do you have a moment to hear about our lord and savior?

(Permalink) - only Moment to hear about our lord and savior? can be seen in the image.

[Hairy and Knit Cap walks past the Pokémon]:

Pikachu:

He shall vanquish us all from this slavery!

(Permalink)

[Hairy and Knit Cap walks out of the tall grass - continue - They walk on seen in silhouette both speaking]

Knit Cap:

I thought Peta was going to liberate the Pokémon?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

I just don't feel like I believe in the Helix fossil anymore

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Do you really think we're all slaves?

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

God either does not exist, or he's got a lot of explaining to do.

(Permalink) Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Your GO or your HP!

(Permalink)

[Hairy and Knit Cap walks past the Pokémon]:

Pikachu: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Actually, it's the final castle. Grab your Fire Flower!

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

OK sorry bad joke

(Permalink)

[They walk on]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

This is what I spent my childhood preparing for!

(Permalink) - only Spent my childhood preparing for! can be seen in the image.

[Same image again]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Are you coming onto me?

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line…

Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-30.)

Or at least I think it's the final one. Seriously, if Peach isn't here I'm going to be pissed.

(Permalink) - only Peach isn't here I'm going to be pissed. can be seen in the image.

[Hairy looks into a hole in the ground ] Hairy:

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

It's over this way.

(Permalink)

[They walk on]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

I've never been this far before!

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy:

Are you going insane again?

(Permalink) Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

We should order pizza after this.

(Permalink) Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

You haven't said anything in a while...

(Permalink) Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Going?

(Permalink) Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Where'd the bridge go?

(Permalink)

[They walk under a tree]

Hairy:

Did you lose your hover boots again?

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

Guess we're walking

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line…

Didn't we chop this tree down to make the bridge?

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Hairy:

Or perhaps that was an alternate reality?

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap thinks]

Knit Cap:

No...

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line…
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-30).

I think I'm stuck in the matrix again.

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "ink cloud"!

It's not very effective …

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line…

Where are you taking me?

(Permalink)

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-30.)

Or maybe we have, and I'm remembering something that happened in the future?

(Permalink) - only Something that happened in the future? can be seen in the image.

[They walk on]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line…

I just figured out how to get to 2048. Quick! We need ducks!

(Permalink) - only How to get to 2048. Quick! We need ducks! can be seen in the image.

[They walk on]

Knit Cap:

Did you notice the top of that last thing you said got kind of cut off?

(Permalink)

[Same image again]

Knit Cap:

You should really keep your comment to 140 characters or fewer

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap thinks]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line…

Is that tree following us?

(Permalink)

[They walk on]

Knit Cap:

Hey, slow down!

(Permalink)

[They walk on both speaking]

Hairy: Suggest a line…
Knit Cap: (There is a speak-line from her up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Hairy - as of 2014-05-30).

Its OK. I've got a blowtorch if it gets any ideas

([link Permalink])

[The two characters start arguing]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there are no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-05-30.)

No, it's just caught in your magnetic field.

(Permalink)

[Continues three images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Ink cloud"!

It's not very effective ...

[One more image with the Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

Magikarp! I choose you!

(Permalink)

[Continues four more images with the Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

It's not very effective ...

Enemy Pikachu used "Radicality"!

It's not very effective ...

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Trainer throws a pokeball!

(Permalink)

[Continues four more images with the Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

It's not very effective ...

Enemy Pikachu used "Uplift"!

It's not very effective ...

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

Suggest a line…

I think we picked it up at the last river.

(Permalink)

[Continues four images with a Pokémon in front of Knit Cap]

Narrator:

A wild Pikachu appeared!

Enemy Pikachu used "Faceless"!

It's not very effective ...

Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-30.)

I have a lawn?

[Knit Cap and Hairy leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
Hairy:

Hmmm, did you order a moat?

Knit Cap:

It helps keep bobcats out.

Of course. All cool kids have moats in their yards.

I don't have the best relationship with my mailman.

Yep. Delivered in two days, courtesy of Amazon Prime.

I don't remember this being here.

Knit Cap:

It has begun! That's one of the first holes in reality.

Knit Cap:

I've been working on a theory that 2048 is a tool for the old ones to open up portals to this reality.

What about black holes? Those don't count?

We must go deeper.

I wanted to jump over the massive sinkhole, but nooo, someone just had to find out what was down there.

Oh, I had the moving company install it last week.

We poop in it.

Finally got you out of the damn house.

Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
Narrator: ...
Pikachu: Um...
Pikachu: Well then.
Pikachu: I might have left surprises in that direction.

Look how deep it goes!

Hairy:

I wonder if we can get someone to fall in?

I'm going in. You can come if you want to. I think I see stars down there.

That was a missing opportunity.

I should come outside more often.

It looks like I can see Moria from here.

Knit Cap:

You see Moria from everywhere, Dave.

Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator:

Google Maps didn't warn me of this.

Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Uplift!"
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Cute Face!"
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Faceless"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Where's Twitch when I need help?
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Abandonment"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...

Enemy Pikachu used "The Discrete Metric"!

Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Extrude"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: ...
Pikachu: Um...
Pikachu:

Now I only have Struggle left. Tie?

Pikachu: No fair!

We are the knights who say Ni!

What is even going on here?

Gathered the ink!

Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Granite"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...

Yeah, who did you think gave them a balrog?

Knit Cap:

One does not simple "give" a balrog.

What? You weren't using it!

Gift-wrapping's the hardest part.

Moria is an anagram of Mario!

[Knit Cap and Hairy pass by a tree.]
Hairy: Not idly do the leaves of Lorien fall.

I hope it's not a bobcat this time.

[A giant hole appears and they fall into it.]
Knit Cap and Hairy: Aaaaa...
[Knit Cap wakes up.]
Knit Cap: Gasp [Goes to his desk.]
Knit Cap: Yawn [Sits at his desk.]
Knit Cap:

Might as well clear more tiles.

[Hairy visits Knit Cap again.]
Hairy:

Um, there's a hole in your lawn...

Knit Cap:

If it doesn't lead to a 1024 tile, I'm leaving.

Damn bobcats.

Hairy:

Well it was here...

I don't think it was bobcats this time. Unless they have backshoes...

I just had a dream about that.

[Knit Cap and Hairy go outside again and fall in the hole again~.]
Knit Cap and Hairy: Aaaaa...
[Knit Cap wakes up, leaves the bed and finds a boomerang.]
Knit Cap:

It looks like is [sic] fell from space.

[Knit Cap throwns the boomerang away and it hits something.]
Crash!
[Knit Cap runs away.]

I hope this isn't just another one of those dreams that keeps coming back at you.

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang twice, only for it to return to him both times.]
Knit Cap: Hm. I was expecting a shark.
[Knit Cap throwns the boomerang again, and it returns to him again.]

I hope this was not thrown by a bobcat.

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang, only for it to return to him .]
Knit Cap: There's a mesage written on it.
[Knit Cap throws the boomerang again. It hits something.]
Crash!
[Knit Cap runs away.]

There's someone at the door looking for you.

I made an apple pie.

If you want to do that, I'm rebuilding my bathroom this afternoon.

Definitely not going outside today.

Thank God it wasn't a bobcat.

Hairy:

You just got a package. It's by the door.

Why is there a bobcat on your lawn?

There's somewhere [sic] weird out on the lawn.

Knit Cap:

This seems familiar.

[Knit Cap and Hairy go outside.]
Knit Cap: I hope it's not a velociraptor.

Hold up. I need to get my wingsuit first.

I hope it's not a giant hole.

[Knit Cap and Hairy go outside. They pass by a tree.]
Hairy: How disappointed are you?
Knit Cap:

I was expecting a bobcat.

Oh? That's the other tree.

Eh, not that much.

I have a bad feeling about this.

Hey do you know why there's a giant hole in the yard?

[Knit Cap and Hairy go outside.]
Knit Cap: I swear if it's a bobcat.
Knit Cap:

Why did you bring me here?

This dream has been looping for years, and yet we never tire of it. Why is that?

[There is a gap in the ground. Knit Cap jumps over it, Hairy looks into it.]

Hmmm... I should buy a shovel.

[Knit Cap looks at his screen wondering.]
Knit Cap:

Wow! Shovels sure are expensive!

Shovels can't be actually made out of two sticks and a row of rocks?

[Knit Cap is wondering more. Hairy comes. They connect their laptops. Hairy is wondering. Knit Cap tries something at Hairy's laptop.]

How can there be 36 types of shovel??!

These prices are insane! I wonder if you can rent a shovel...

If you reprogrammed the squirrel laser to target hipsters again...

[Knit Cap and Hairy go outside.]
Knit Cap:

Let's just say we won't have to worry about parking.

No, now they're just wearing wigs ironically.

Things may have gotten out of control a little.

At least it improved their haircuts.

There's a dinosaur at the door.

(Permalink)

[A green dinosaur appears]

Dinosaur:

Self-doubt crippled my arms. Can I have yours?

(Permalink)

[Zooming in on the dinosaurs head]

Dinosaur:

Never answer your mobile phone while I am addressing you!

This branch was complete as of 2014-05-24.

(Permalink)

[The dinosaur is going to step on their house]

Dinosaur:

I think you just entered a dead zone.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed - continue - she is again lying down in bed - continue - she walks outside and finds a boomerang - continue - she picks up the boomerang]

Knit Cap:

Up up down down left right left right B A

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches up to catch it – she stands with the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

If I forgot you, will it come back to me?

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches up to catch it – she stands with the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Hmmm. Bendy.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches up to catch it – she stands with the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Suggest a line…

Kids these days.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed - continue - the bed is empty - continue - she walks in to her laptop]

Knit Cap: Yawn

[Knit Cap sits in front of her lap top – the first image again]

Knit Cap:

A little gaming should calm me down.

(Permalink)

[Hairy walks in]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

These stupid lines...

(Permalink)

[Knit Caps types on the PC]

Knit Cap: ??

[Knit Cap bends closer to the screen]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Suggest a line...

So Rude

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed – continue she is again lying down in bed - continue - she walks outside and finds a boomerang - continue - she picks up the boomerang]

Knit Cap:

Bommerangs… I know how the dinosaurs went extinct.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches down to catch it – continue – she throws the boomerang again - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches up to catch it – she stands with the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic boomerang and said...

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches up to catch it – continue – she stands with the boomerang – continue - she throws the boomerang again - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns hitting her in the head]

Boomerang: Thwack!
Knit Cap:Ow

[Knit Cap walks away from the boomerang holding her head in her hand]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

We meet again

(Permalink)

Boomerang: Thwack!
Knit Cap:Ow

[Knit Cap walks away from the boomerang holding her head in her hand]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

My entire life has prepared me for this moment.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns flying over her head – it then returns over her head the other way – continue - she waits - the boomerang returns and she reaches up to catch it – continue – she stands with the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Die you monster.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Hairy wakes up from her nightmare in his bed]

Hairy: Gasp

[ Hairy sits in bed]

Hairy (singing): I woke up like this

[the bed is empty – continue – Hairy walks in to Knit Cap at the laptop]

Hairy: Yawn

You should really set your phone to vibrate.

(Permalink)

[Hairy now stands in front of her]:

Hairy: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

I have to stop hanging out with pintsize

(Permalink)

[The dinosaur appears again]:

Dinosaur: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

If dinosaurs think I’m a monster... I really should go to therapy.

(Permalink)

[The dinosaur appears again]:

Dinosaur: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Had the T-Rex dream again. Add “mobile phones” to the list of things he hates.

(Permalink)

[The dinosaur appears again]:

Dinosaur: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Also, have you heard about Tumblr?

Also I have some trenchant observations on language and philosophy to make.

This branch was complete as of 2014-05-24.

(Permalink)

[The dinosaur is going to step on their house]

Dinosaur:

Consider this cabin: The residents take its permanence for granted, yet it’s so ephemeral in the grand scheme.

(Permalink) – only Permanence for granted, yet it’s so ephemeral in the grand scheme. can be seen in the image as there is not enough space.

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed - continue - she is again lying down in bed - continue - she walks outside and finds a boomerang - continue - she picks up the boomerang]

Knit Cap:

I must contemplate this boomerang really hard.

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap throws the boomerang - continue - she waits - the boomerang returns hitting her in the head]

Boomerang: Thwack!
Knit Cap:Ow

[Knit Cap walks away from the boomerang holding her hers in her hand]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Suggest a line…

One might imagine the computer screen as an escape from the perils of the outside world, but a life half lived is barely worth living at all!

(Permalink) – only Of the outside world, but a life half lived is barely worth living at all! can be seen in the image as there is not enough space.

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed - continue - the bed is empty - continue - she walks in to her laptop]

Knit Cap: Yawn

[Knit Cap sits in front of her lap top – the first image again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Take this house, a mere fraction of existence, crushed beneath me

(Permalink)

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed]

Knit Cap (singing): I woke up like this

[Knit Cap is again lying down in bed - continue - she walks outside and finds a boomerang - continue - she picks up the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

Like this house modern language is an attempt to construct something of use from fragments of a mightier whole.

(Permalink) – only Language is an attempt to construct something of use from fragments of a mightier whole. can be seen in the image as there is not enough space.

[Knit Cap ducks as a dinosaur foot crashes down through the roof]

Knit Cap: Augh

[Knit Cap wakes up from her nightmare in her bed]

Knit Cap: Gasp

[Knit Cap sits in bed - continue - she is again lying down in bed - continue - she walks outside and finds a boomerang - continue - she picks up the boomerang]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line… (No options as of 2014-05-24.)

It's not like you're using them.

(Permalink)

I need a hand!

(Permalink)

Did you think he was joking?

(Permalink)

[Dinosaur asks, face closer to camera]

Dinosaur:

Lets go Bowling!

(Permalink)

Seriously though, were you?

(Permalink)

No seriously though, this is the part where you flee

(Permalink)

Because he totally was! That's when I slipped through the door after him!

(Permalink)

Sorry for just barging in, I couldn't reach the doorbell.

(Permalink)

I heard Home Depot has 1024 bathroom tiles.

(Permalink)

[They leave]

Knit Cap:

But how many bathrooms?

(Permalink)

That's 2^5 more than Ikea, I need to see for myself.

(Permalink)

Let's go, I can keep playing on my phone on the drive.

(Permalink)

Pfft. Amateurs. Let's go mock them.

(Permalink)

I think I saw a "4096" tile outside somewhere.

(Permalink)

[They leave]

Knit Cap:

І follow, only because І believe you

(Permalink)

І'll tag along, if only to see what new calming pastel color it could be.

(Permalink)

These "threes" clones are getting out of hand.

(Permalink)

we better catch the damn thing

(Permalink)

Political Thing Branch

Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on. (Permalink)

Laptop: "...and let's go live to the debate."
[Two politicians are debating on TV.]
Politician 1:

In contrast to my oppponent, who I quote, "Never liked Firefly much to begin with."

...but even if you tied enough birds to the car, would you get them to take off in unison?

Politician 2:

Tie a predatory bird to the car with a somewhat shorter rope so that it will scare off the rest of the birds without being able to reach them.

Training. That's why I support the "Airlift Act", which would put more resources into the hands of bird educators everywhere.

Politician 1:

But is "Airlift" an acronym?

Hairy:

There are birds outside tied to a car.

Knit Cap:

Cool, let's see who we should vote for.

I know who I'm voting for.

How many birds? (permalink)

Hairy:

I call her "Serenity."

So when you said birds...

Knit Cap:

Wait. The birds are inside!?

White Hat: Want to forget your dreams? There's a pill for that!

Someone inside the rocket: I needed to escape from politics anyway.

Voice inside the rocket: "…And let’s go live to the debate". (permalink) Other spacecraft: We observe your speed to be 38.5%c, and your time is passing at 92.3% the rate of ours. Does this mirror your observations?

All terms are relative.

Liquefied bird fuel is the way to the future.

Well, by “birds” and “car” I really meant a rocket. There’s totally a rocket in your lawn, man.

The owls in our barn are forming a union.

Or course: Avian Implemented Reuseable Lifter and Ingenuous Flight Technology!

But you must agree that a bitd in the hand is worth more than three educators in the bush.

Incredible!

Wait... Is that like people who educate birds, or birds that teach?

By opening and closing an umbrella near them.

One word: Fiscal hawks.

And if elected, I vow to win this war on Christmas once and for all!

I agree with my opponent all all [sic] issues and I think his economic plan is fantastic!

Yeah? well І agreed wholeheartedly with yours, first! You can't copy mine!

BSD Branch

Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays. (Permalink)

[Knit Cap is confused, staring at her laptop.]
Knit Cap: ??
Knit Cap:

Now I just need to look up what a "beard error" is...

[Knit Cap has ?? next to her head to signify confusion. Hairy walks in. (continue) Hairy is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. The two stop typing. Hairy has ??? next to his head. Hairy had stepped back while the character is checking on Hairy's laptop computer. Knit Cap is holding something rectangular.]
Hairy:

The USB cable appears to be mono-directional.

Kernel mites?

I'm not sure rubbing butter on it will help

[Hairy and Knit Cap are handling their computers more aggressively.]
Knit Cap: ARGH!

                          [They both stop. Knit Cap walks away, her chair turned 180 degrees. Pushing aside the chair, she returns with a fiery blowtorch while wearing goggles.]
Hairy: [holding up a finger] Um.
[Knit Cap's computer was so burned, not only steam is coming out of the computer, but even the desk is noticeably burnt. The cable (apparently also burned) hangs from Hairy's laptop computer. The used blowtorch is clumsily laid sideways be the side of the desk. Both Knit Cap (whose goggles are pushed off his eye) and Hairy are looking at the calamity. The chair is almost out of view. The goggles are on the floor while the chair is nowhere to be seen. Hairy and Knit Cap are walking away from the scene.]
Hairy:

Are you all of a sudden in the mood for Thai food?

Let's try OpenBSD next time...

[First panel is of a panned view. Hairy and Knit Cap are walking on a path away from a house. Next panel is back to a "normal camera view".]
Hairy:

Okay then.

Let's go exploring!

I love Windows.

Guess not.

If you'd done the other one, maybe the popcorn would have popped.

Let's see if rubbing some bacon on it will work.

Let's try Linux next time...

Yep. It's haunted.

Wait. What's on this other partition?

[Knit Cap has ??? next to her head to signify confusion. Hairy walks in. Hairy is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. The two stop typing. Hairy has ??? next to his head. Hairy had stepped back while Knit Cap is checking on Hairy's laptop computer. Knit Cap is holding something rectangular.]
Hairy:

Maybe if you cross connect the serial port to video port you'll be able to send the video directly in as an input for the password.

[Knit Cap and Hairy are at sea, both emitting ripples. A shark's fin can be seen close to Hairy.]
Hairy:

It worked fine for the shark

We're definitely getting closer though

That didn't work!

It would have worked for Solaris.

Look, it made perfect sense at the time.

Still simpler than it used to be, I guess.

What's a segfault?

I think the cameras need to face each other.

I'm not sure spaghetti works as a USB cable...

Why is Python importing Skynet?

(Permalink)

Knit Cap: ???

[Hairy walks in - continue - Hairy is on the other side of the desk with his own laptop computer. Both the computers are connected through Ethernet cable. The two characters are typing on the computer. - continue - The two stop typing.]

Hairy: ???

[Hairy has stepped back while Knit Cap is checking on Hairy's laptop computer. Knit Cap is reading something of a piece of paper and types on the laptop.]

Hairy:

It’s definitely the dust

We’re doomed

Well, it does have a certificate from cyberdyne systems.

Your computer is literally haunted

This branch was complete as of 2014-04-20.

(Permalink)

[Hairy and Knit Cap are suddenly floating in the ocean.]

Knit Cap:

I think my exact phrase was “don’t.”

(Permalink)

Hairy:

Should have said it faster (permalink)

[One shark appear]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Restart the computer (permalink)

[Three sharks appears]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Don’t say that. (permalink)

[The same image appears again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Suggest a line…

Maybe we tried guessing the root password too many times

(Permalink)

Hairy:

I told you, the password is never “swordfish.” (permalink)

[One shark appear]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

I just want to know how a 17th century coppersmith installed a key-logger (permalink) - only coppersmith installed a key-logger can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[The same image appears again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Password may have been a desperate last guess (permalink)

[The same image appears again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Suggest a line…

OK , maybe sudo teleport * `random-GPS was the wrong thing to type

(Permalink)

Hairy:

To be fair most computers can’t actually do that (permalink)

[One shark appear]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

But a chance at landing it in the playboy mansion, no matter how slim is always worth the gamble (permalink) - only matter how slim is always worth the gamble can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.

[The same image appears again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Still though, you gotta admit it did what is was asked (permalink)

[The same image appears again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

I won’t say “I told you so… But” (permalink)

[Three sharks appears]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Which version of BSD where you using?

(Permalink) Hairy:

The first one? (permalink)

[The same image appears again]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Dunno. It was from some random FTP server. (permalink)

[One shark appear]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

The one with the picture of the fish on it… Perhaps I should have actually read the details. (permalink - only should have actually read the details can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.)

[Three sharks appears]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

The 1997 special release on standard definition (permalink - only Release on standard definition can be seen in the image as Knit Cap's text overlaps Hairy's.)

[A shark and three octopuses appear - continue - they are all gone but there is red blood in the water - continue - the ocean is now clean/empty - Hairy starts swimming away from Knit Cap.]

Knit Cap:

I see your class in see-jitsu has paid off (permalink - This comic ties for longest comic with sharks so far - 13 panels)

[The two characters reach a beach and walks out of the ocean – continue – the two walk on in silhouette]

Knit Cap: Suggest a line…
Hairy: (There is a speak-line from him up to a possible text – but no suggestion can be reached as there is no choices for Knit Cap - as of 2014-04-20.)

Why are you leaving? That was the most fun I’ve had all day! (permalink - only the bottom of Why are you can be seen above the rest of the text. This comic tie for longest comic with sharks so far - 13 panels)

[The two characters reach a beach and walks out of the ocean – continue – they reach a pit in the ground. Knit Cap jumps over while Hairy looks down into it]

Hairy: Suggest a line… (There is no choices - as of 2014-04-20.)

Suggest a line…

My keyboard has to support SSH over USB?

Facebook Branch
Hurry! We're in talks with Facebook. (Permalink) Hairy: Google's at the door. They want to buy your... Well I'd rather you heard it from them. Come check out my neighbour's ball pit. It's full of balls. Oh, didn't I tell you? I got their database password years ago Do you think they'll care that the coffee machine doesn't work?

Gravity Branch
Gravity. Lots of it. (This option is no longer available as of 2014-04-22 - Permalink)

ㅤ

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
-{{notice|We still have many storylines missing. Feel free to add more if you find them!}}
+This is the complete transcript for the dynamic comic [[1350: Lorenz]], formatted following a {{w|tree structure}}, as you can see from the table of contents below. A permalink is provided for every panel, at least at the end of a comic, as not all the storylines that were available originally are available today. Note that, if there are more than four choices, a permalink is not enough to get to the first panel of that chain. Similarly, the choices you have when you choose a permalink won't come in the same order. To be certain to have all choices, there are permalinks on all steps of a story tree. __NOEDITSECTION__
-This is a valiant effort to create a transcript for the continually growing dynamic comic [[1350: Lorenz]]. There's a {{w|tree structure}} at the bottom of the page to easily understand the structure of the entire transcript ([[#skip-to-bottom-anchor|Jump to bottom]]). Expand below if you want to contribute building the transcript.
+:'''Knit Cap''':
+:[Typing on the laptop and thinking.]
+:([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:be7a3304-b685-11e3-8001-94de80a03a29 Permalink])<br>
+__TOC__
-'''A permalink is needed''' (at least at the end of a comic) for every transcript because not all the storylines that were available originally are available today and without the link no one can check if the transcript here is wrong. Note that even from a permalink - if you click back, you may not even get the possibility you came from, if there are more than four choices - like in the first panel, but for instance also in the second panel of the refresh choice. Similarly, the choices you have when you choose a permalink won't come in the same order, and if there are more than four, you will again not be certain to have the choice you wish for - to be certain to have all choices, you need to save permalinks on all steps of a story tree. If you complete a part of the transcript, then please add a note and a date on which this occurred like this: "This branch was complete as of 2014-04-20. (Taken from the ''Your computer is literally haunted'' branch of the BSD story on ''Why is Python importing Skynet?'')".
-Typically, there will be four options. Then the version below can be inserted. After the last line of text, followed by a '''Permalink''' continue like this:
+{{cot|expand=yes|<h2>'''Refresh Branch'''</h2>}}
+:Refresh... No new email... Refresh... No new tweets... Refresh... ([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
-<source>(Last Permalink)
-:[Description of image for instance: Knit Cap thinks]
-'''Knit Cap''':
-<div style="border-left: 2px solid #bbb; margin-left: 1em; padding-left: 0.1em">
-<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Line_1
-<div class="mw-collapsible-content">(["link to permalink" Permalink_1])</div></div>
-<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Line_2
-<div class="mw-collapsible-content">(["link to permalink" Permalink_2])</div></div>
-<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Line_3
-<div class="mw-collapsible-content">(["link to permalink" Permalink_3])</div></div>
-<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Line_4
-<div class="mw-collapsible-content">(["link to permalink" Permalink_4])</div></div>
-</div>
-</source>
-__NOTOC__
-'''Knit Cap''':<br>[Typing on the laptop and thinking.]<br>([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:be7a3304-b685-11e3-8001-94de80a03a29 Permalink])
-{{cot|<big><h2>'''Refresh Branch'''</h2></big>}}
-   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Refresh... No new email... Refresh... No new tweets... Refresh... ([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:6479d184-b9a0-11e3-b947-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
        <div class="mw-collapsible-content">:[Hairy walks in] '''Hairy''':
           <div style="border-left: 2px solid #bbb; margin-left: 1em; padding-left: 0.1em">
@@ Line 512: / Line 488: @@
 ===You know. Your car's on fire.===
-                <div class="mw-collapsible-content">([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:1a3242da-b9c0-11e3-8006-002590d77bdd Permalink])</div></div></div></div>
+                <div class="mw-collapsible-content">([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:1a3242da-b9c0-11e3-8006-002590d77bdd Permalink])</div></div></div>
 {{cob}}
@@ Line 519: / Line 495: @@
-{{cot|<big><h2>'''Stupid Tiles Branch'''</h2></big>}}
+{{cot|expand=yes|<h2>'''Stupid Tiles Branch'''</h2>}}
-   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
+:These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game.
-These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game.
 ([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:79f036ac-b9a0-11e3-9003-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
        <div class="mw-collapsible-content">[Hairy visits Knit Cap.]<br>'''Hairy''':
@@ Line 1,171: / Line 1,146: @@
                                <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
-=====Also, have you heard about Tumblr?=====</div>
+=====Also, have you heard about Tumblr?=====
+</div>
                                <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
 =====Also I have some trenchant observations on language and philosophy to make.=====
@@ Line 1,320: / Line 1,296: @@
 ====we better catch the damn thing====
                          <div class="mw-collapsible-content">
-([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:161c1e4e-b9a9-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd Permalink])</div></div></div></div></div></div></div>
+([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:161c1e4e-b9a9-11e3-8001-002590d77bdd Permalink])</div></div></div></div></div></div>
 {{cob}}
@@ Line 1,327: / Line 1,303: @@
-{{cot|<big><h2>'''Political Thing Branch'''</h2></big>}}
+{{cot|expand=yes|<h2>'''Political Thing Branch'''</h2>}}
-   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on. ([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:16a6d0c6-b9a3-11e3-8ea4-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
+:Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on. ([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:16a6d0c6-b9a3-11e3-8ea4-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
        <div class="mw-collapsible-content">'''Laptop''': "...and let's go live to the debate."<br>[Two politicians are debating on TV.]<br>'''Politician 1''':
           <div style="border-left: 2px solid #bbb; margin-left: 1em; padding-left: 0.1em">
@@ Line 1,372: / Line 1,348: @@
              <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">I agree with my opponent all all [sic] issues and I think his economic plan is fantastic!
                 <div class="mw-collapsible-content">
-                   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Yeah? well І agreed wholeheartedly with yours, first! You can't copy mine!</div></div></div></div></div>
+                   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Yeah? well І agreed wholeheartedly with yours, first! You can't copy mine!</div></div></div></div>
 {{cob}}
@@ Line 1,379: / Line 1,355: @@
-{{cot|<big><h2>'''BSD Branch'''</h2></big>}}
+{{cot|expand=yes|<h2>'''BSD Branch'''</h2>}}
-   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays. ([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:00ac9f74-b9a0-11e3-81f8-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
+:Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays. ([http://www.xkcd.com/1350/#p:00ac9f74-b9a0-11e3-81f8-94de80a03a39 Permalink])
        <div class="mw-collapsible-content">[Knit Cap is confused, staring at her laptop.]<br>'''Knit Cap''': ??<br>'''Knit Cap''':
           <div style="border-left: 2px solid #bbb; margin-left: 1em; padding-left: 0.1em">
@@ Line 1,431: / Line 1,407: @@
           <div style="border-left: 2px solid #bbb; margin-left: 1em; padding-left: 0.1em">
              <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
-====It’s definitely the dust====</div>
+====It’s definitely the dust====
+</div>
              <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
-====We’re doomed====</div>
+====We’re doomed====
+</div>
                       <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
-====Well, it does have a certificate from cyberdyne systems.====</div>
+====Well, it does have a certificate from cyberdyne systems.====
+</div>
                       <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
 ====Your computer is literally haunted====
@@ Line 1,534: / Line 1,513: @@
              <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">
-===My keyboard has to support SSH over USB?===</div></div></div>
+===My keyboard has to support SSH over USB?===
+</div></div>
 {{cob}}
@@ Line 1,541: / Line 1,521: @@
-=='''Facebook Branch'''==
+{{cot|expand=yes|<h2>'''Facebook Branch'''</h2>}}
-   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Hurry! We're in talks with Facebook. ([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:2b330d48-bb01-11e3-8003-002590d77bdd Permalink])
+:Hurry! We're in talks with Facebook. ([https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:2b330d48-bb01-11e3-8003-002590d77bdd Permalink])
        <div class="mw-collapsible-content">'''Hairy''':
           <div style="border-left: 2px solid #bbb; margin-left: 1em; padding-left: 0.1em">
@@ Line 1,548: / Line 1,528: @@
              <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Come check out my neighbour's ball pit. It's full of balls.</div>
              <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Oh, didn't I tell you? I got their database password years ago</div>
-             <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Do you think they'll care that the coffee machine doesn't work?</div></div></div></div>
+             <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Do you think they'll care that the coffee machine doesn't work?</div></div></div>
+{{cob}}
@@ Line 1,554: / Line 1,535: @@
-=='''Gravity Branch'''==
+{{cot|expand=yes|<h2>'''Gravity Branch'''</h2>}}
-   <div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed leftAlign" style="width:100%">Gravity. Lots of it. (This option is no longer available as of 2014-04-22 - [https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:87adb65e-baa2-11e3-8012-002590d77bdd Permalink])</div></div></div>
+:Gravity. Lots of it. (This option is no longer available as of 2014-04-22 - [https://xkcd.com/1350/#p:87adb65e-baa2-11e3-8012-002590d77bdd Permalink])</div></div>
+{{cob}}
+ㅤ
 {{DEFAULTSORT:1350}}
 [[Category:Comic subpages]]

Difference between revisions of "1350: Lorenz/Transcript"

Latest revision as of 14:03, 21 June 2025

Contents

Refresh Branch

So you're still refusing to use Facebook?

I will not submit to peer pressure... Wait I should tweet that, hold on.

Or should I MySpace this?

Tweet. Ironic, because I am in fact a bird. Or is it the other way around?

Wait a second. I don't have a phone!

I can't reach the 3 key and the Shift key at the same time.

I can only stand so many motivational and cat pics, man!

Go analog, dog

Memes are becoming memes themselves

And judging from their profile pictures, Facebook causes the newly married to turn into infants

They make me so hungry.

That's right, kids! Now you can have your very own Facebook page!

Narcissism has never been this easy! Back in my day, we had to maually brag about every minor event in our life all over town!

It makes all your in-person social interactions more awkward!

Become a retro hipster before everyone else by adopting the most mainstream fad!

Now let's take this crossover to the next level!

I am Facebooksaurus!

I will swallow your personal data!

...of genus Socialnetworkus.

I fear the existential ambiguity of irreconcilable proclivities in prepetuity!

And I am two social outlets from being a hipster.

Wanna build a snowman?

Hey. I hear Godot is in town. Wanna try to meet him?

Did you get my e-mail yet?

Yeah, I'm thinking Thai for lunch

Has this hole always been here?

I don't know if actually going to Thailand is necessary…

Is it common for Thai businesses to have rooftop access?

There's a small crack in the pavement

The one with the cats of the one about geocaching in the Pentagon?

I hope it's open. Otherwise we'll just have to resort to those cat videos.

Either way we're getting on a watch-list.

So are we really doing this?

I don't care what anyone says- Donuts are not a valid breakfast choice.

Yes. You didn't see me reply burned into the lawn?

See? It’s right there!

So I guess we’re married now?

Maybe my font size was too big.

It took a lot of gasoline

Gmail must be down. Let's check it out.

It’s that hell’s light?

I wonder what’s down there

Isn’t that Sergey Brin down there?

How long do you think he’ll keep digging?

You know. Your car's on fire.

Stupid Tiles Branch

There's something weird out on the lawn.

This is an apartment. We don't have a lawn.

OK, two weird things.

I can see a creeper down there

Is this 1-1 from Mario?

Where'd the bridge go?

I have a lawn?

I hope it's not a bobcat this time.

If you reprogrammed the squirrel laser to target hipsters again...

There's a dinosaur at the door.

Self-doubt crippled my arms. Can I have yours?

Never answer your mobile phone while I am addressing you!

Also, have you heard about Tumblr?

Also I have some trenchant observations on language and philosophy to make.

It's not like you're using them.

I need a hand!

Did you think he was joking?

Sorry for just barging in, I couldn't reach the doorbell.

I heard Home Depot has 1024 bathroom tiles.

But how many bathrooms?

That's 2^5 more than Ikea, I need to see for myself.

Let's go, I can keep playing on my phone on the drive.

Pfft. Amateurs. Let's go mock them.

I think I saw a "4096" tile outside somewhere.

І follow, only because І believe you

І'll tag along, if only to see what new calming pastel color it could be.

These "threes" clones are getting out of hand.

we better catch the damn thing

Political Thing Branch

BSD Branch