2765: Escape Speed/Transcript

Below, you will find a complete transcript for 2765: Escape Speed.

• Overview

[An interactive comic featuring a large world with many planets and objects, navigable by a small spaceship. The ship is affected by the gravity of the planets and objects and controllable by arrow keys. The up arrow activates the main engine, adding forward speed; the down arrow activates reverse (bow) thrusters. Left and right arrows activate thrusters which rotate the spaceship. The spaceship features a "radar" - grey dots around it. The placement of the dots around indicate directions to nearby planets; the size and shade of gray indicate distance. The playing field is a viewport into space, the ship is always in the center and the viewport scrolls as the ship moves through space - the player sees only relatively small part of the overall game world. Orientation is a bit difficult, exacerbated by the fact that the view automatically rotates according to the local gradient of gravity. The world features collectible items (small gray circles) and powerups (grey hollow stars). Sometimes these are collocated, i.e. a gray circle appears in the hollow center of a gray star. When the ship flies close to a collectible or powerup, it disappears and a message is shown in the lower part of the viewport. After picking up most collectibles, their names are added to the "You've found" list below the playing field; unless you are viewing a mobile-device version, where the playing area is optimised to full-screen. Some collectibles display a message only and do not add an item to the list. The player can return to the starting position (keeping all powerups and collected items) by clicking the Home button in the bottom right of the playing field.]

• Starting planet

[A tiny grassy planet with a few trees and bushes and four collectibles. A planet is so tiny that it can be seen whole in the game's viewport. This is where the player starts, or returns after clicking the Home button. Initially the navigation is difficult because of low initial engine thrust and strong gravity of the Origin planet nearby affecting movement. There's a collectible right up from the starting position (shows a message only and is not reflected in the "You've found" list)]

WHEEEE!

[Other features of the planet, as they are encountered by carefully moving just above the planet's surface in the clockwise direction are:]

[A tree, about twice as high as the spaceship]

[A collectible low in the grass]

You found a cool bug!

[A small tree and a larger tree to the right, with a collectible up its branches]

You found a pretty leaf!

[A tree sapling]

[Beret Guy pointing his arm up. From that position the surface of the Origin planet can be seen above.]

Beret Guy: WOW!

[A large tree]

[Cueball and Megan standing together.]

[A small tree]

[Another collectible just off the surface]

You found a rock with neat stripes!

[A small tree]

• Origin planet

[The planet has vegetation and features several people, landscape objects and collectibles, and it has a shaft through the center. The planet is hard to leave without any powerups, unless one uses the shaft to gain more momentum by thrusting while moving through the center. The features of the planet include (clockwise):]

[A billboard]

Welcome to Origin! You can never leave™

[A rollercoaster with a duck sitting on it. At the middle of it there's a (hidden) entrance to the shaft. There's a collectible item above.]

Be careful; this roller coaster can be disorienting! (message only)

[A billboard to the right of the rollercoaster]

Caution: Long vertical drop

[A spider figure; going straight up from there you can reach the Giant Spider planet]

[A radiotelescope; going up you can reach Voyager 1(?)]

Receiving transmission

[Cueball and White Hat]

White Hat: I bet the voyager spacecraft could teach you a thing or two about speed. Of course, you'd have to catch up to them first...

[A cell tower with 5G antennas and the satellite from xkcd comic 1992: Safety sat on top. There's a collectible next to it.]

You've found a 5G seagull!

[A tyrannosaurus, Ponytail and Cueball standing next to a St. Louis Arch-shaped hole in the ground]

[A strange object]

[A pyramid with a football on top; leads to the Space Soccer Game planet]

[Ponytail sitting on top of a pyramid, Megan standing at the base of it]

Ponytail: If you want a better spaceship, you need to visit another planet.

Megan: But if I want to visit another planet, I need a better spaceship!

[A pyramid with Saturn on top; leads to the Saturn]

[Cueball and White Hat]

Cueball: I can't believe the Air and Space Museum's new exhibit has a real black hole!

White Hat: Is that... safe?

Cueball: It's OK, they've got a protective case around it.

[A few clouds]

[A recess in the ground with a monument shaped as Earth continents in a hyperelliptical projection. Hairy is standing next to it.]

Hairy: Even if you did find a crack in the crystal sphere, there's no way you'd be able to escape its gravitational pull. You'd need some kind of a hyperdrive for that.

[A spaceship from xkcd comic 2630: Shuttle Skeleton. Going up from there you can reach Shuttle Skeleton planet.]

[St. Louis Arch. There's a hidden entrance to the tunnel under it; launching from the tunnel you can reach the Hollow planet. An intelligible sign is posted next to it. To the right Ponytail stands with three kids looking like Hairy, Megan and Cueball.]

Ponytail: The St. Louis Arch is also known as the gateway to space.

[A strange object (possibly marking direction to the Roche Lobe Earth)]

[A small building and a strange tower with a spiked orb on top and two collectibles next to it, one close to the tower top, another one hidden at the base on the right side.]

You've found an orb wren!

You've found 11 squares packed into a larger square!

[Hairbun and another person; launching from there you can reach the What if? planet]

Hairbun: Boston? That's in North America, on the Subway planet. It's straight up from the secret glade, you can't miss it.

[A grassy area with two collectibles]

You've found a tumbleweed!

You've found a marsh wren!

[A quintet of hairy and bearded people playing and singing]

It's more than a feeling

More than a feeling

[A collectible high off the surface right to the band]

You've found a tiny meteorite! (message only)

[Another collectible higher off (reachable only after you visit another planet and find engine pwoerup)]

You've found a single grain of salt!

[A spiral on a pedestal; going straight up from there leads you to the Uzumaki aka the Spiral planet]

[A radiotelescope; going up you can reach Voyager 2(?)]

Receiving transmission

[Cueball and Megan]

Megan: it's like my astronomy teacher always said: "Shoot for the Moon -- even if you miss, you might make a crack in the crystal sphere that imprisons us all in this universe."

[A collectible clockwise from Megan]

You've found a holographic Charizard business card!

[A patch of trees and bushes]

A bush: SHHH.

[A collectible between two lower trees next to the talking bush; launching from there you can reach the Subway planet.]

You've found a secret glade!

[Another collectible hidden up a large tree next to the secret glade]

You've found a normal-looking leaf!

[In the center of the planet there's a round hollow with a collectible in the exact middle]

Welcome to liminal space! (message only)

[Next to the hollow there's a cave with another collectible]

You've found a DVD of The Core (2003)!

[In the cave there's Megan, her hair flying around her head in the microgravity]

Megan: The Oberth effect states that firing thrusters deeper in a gravity well adds more kinetic energy.

[Applying the above hint from Megan, you can launch high above the St. Luis Arch to reach a star-shaped powerup]

Nice flying! Your tanks recharge faster now.

[Launching like that you can reach the Hollow planet]

• Hollow planet

[The planet is just a crust with a few holes through which you can fall into the center. Near the center, Ponytail and White Hat fly in micorgravity.]

White Hat: It's weird how a hollow shell doesn't exert gravitational force on objects inside it.

Ponytail: Oh, so that's why we don't feel a pull from the crystal sphere.

[Next to White Hat and Ponytail there's a powerup]

You've found a sixth Lagrange point! Your thrusters are more efficient now.

[On the surface of the Hollow planet there's a bunch of signs with arrows pointing up and the names of the planet which lay in this direction. These are (clockwise):]

Origin and Subway

Earth (compromise projection)

Round planet

Exit

Uzumaki

[There's a powerup between "Round planet" and "Exit" signs]

You've found a glass of heavy water! Your engine gets a bit more powerful.

• Round planet

[A planet without any vegetation but with some architecture and people on it. It's features are (clockwise):]

[The Great Wall of China]

[Two small figures of Megan and Cueball on the Great Wall]

Cueball: The Great Wall of China is the only Human-made structure toy can see space from.

[A few stones with a collectible and powerup above them]

You've found a sensible cheese platter. Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.

[The Stonehenge with a collectible between megaliths and Cueball standing next to it]

You've found a swatch pop-out wristwatch!

[Hairbun walking on absurdly high stilts]

[Three spaceships flying just above the surface. The leading one transmits a message:]

Rogue group, use your harpoons and tow cables! Go for the legs!

[A powerup just above the middle ship]

Your engine gets a bit more powerful.

[A volleyball net. Cueball is jumping in the air to hit a volleyball on the right side on the net while Ponytail is juggling three bowling pins on the left side.]

[An airplane towing a long, narrow banner with a message printed across]

Does any one know how to get this thing to print in land scape mode?

[Beret Guy climbing a 5G tower with some fruit(?) hanging off the antennas. Cueball is standing next to it.]

[A small volcano cone]

[Huge gallows with a large flag on a pole hanging on it. The pole of the flag is twisted into a shape partly resembling an infinity sign; the loose and of the pole pierces the flag. A relatively large Cueball figure stand next to it.]

• Uzumaki

[A large spiral overgrown with grass and some other vegetation. Features (clockwise):]

[The outside of the spiral]

[A collectible and a powerup]

You've found a single caffeine molecule! Your thrusters are more efficient now.

[A single tree]

[A pack of three birds flying]

[A group of stones in an area free of vegetation]

[The "entrance" to the spiral with a collectible, displaying a message only]

EXIT ONLY

[The inside of the spiral]

[Cueball running]

[A collectible]

You've found a festive but somehow unnerving holiday card from Junji Ito!

[A bush]

[A collectible]

You've found a podcast episode!

[Another collectible]

You've found a friendly bee.

[A dead bush]

[A collectible]

You've found an ink cartridge

[A free-roaming Roomba]

Roomba: WHIRRR

[A collectible just above Roomba]

You're going the wrong way! (message only)

[Another collectible]

You've found a spiral-cut diamond

[Still another collectible]

You've found a golden radio tuned to 1.618 MHz

[Beret Guy standing]

Beret Guy: I like spirals!

[A collectible]

You've found a burrito

[Another collectible]

You've found a cool pair of shoes with flames on the side!

[Still another collectible]

You've found a scroll lock key

[A small tree]

[A collectible]

You've found a primordial black hole

[A collectible and a powerup right at the center of the spiral]

You've found a tree-filled grove and a nice spot for quiet contemplation. Your thrusters are significantly more efficient now.

[The center of the spiral is a dead end - one needs to fly all the way back out or just hit the Home button]

• Guitar Ship planet

[A planet shaped like a guitar seen in perspective looking from the bottom of the body, with a dome on the back side. The planet lies close to Uzumaki, one can reach it by observing the spaceship's radar. Within the dome, there's the Boston skyline. Just over the dome there's a collectible.]

You've found a guitar pick!

• Spacetime Soccer game planet

[A small planet with a smooth surface and a distorted soccer field marked around it. The goals and goal area lines are on the opposite sides of the planet (let's say, to the east and west), distored into curved trapezoids. The touch lines (side lines) are sections of hyperbolas with the vertices closest to the planet at the north and south poles, extending symmetrically to some distance from the planet. There is no goal line; in this geomentry it should be the extended axis. What seems to be penalty lines, but drawn incorrectly to join the side lines instead of going back to the goal line, are sections of an ellipse. The halfway line appears twice joining the four ends of hyperbolic side lines, together with two halves of the center circle. The field utilizes the concept from xkcd comic 2705: Spacetime soccer, but inversed: the gravity well is located at both goals, not in the center. Hairy, Megan, Cueball and Ponytails are playing. Ponytail has just kicked a football. Each goal has a powerup inside.]

GOOOAAAAAALLLLL! Your engine gets a bit more powerful.

GOOOAAAAAALLLLL! Your thrusters are more efficient now.

[Another powerup lies at a pole of the planet]

You've found a sunspot. Your launch speed has increased.

[Still another power up lies at the center spot on one of the copies of the half-way line]

You've found a 3 million points line. Your thrusters are more efficient now.

• Saturn

[A planet with rings, and a huge soccer ball inside, one of the ball's white hexagon surfacing in the north pole area. There's a collectible at the equator, below the rings.]

You've found a really cool data point!

[A powerup is located at the south pole]

You've found a block of scandium. Your engine gets a little more powerful.

[Another powerup at middle lattitudes of the northern hemishpere]

You've found a pair of platonic solids, not quite touching. Your engine gets a little more powerful.

• Andal

[A small rocky and grassy planet. Features (clockwise):]

[A T-shaped tower with a powerup on top]

What a nice place for a ship to seat! Your tanks recharge faster now.

[Two fantasy animals: one looks like a centaur, the other as a horse-headed centaur. Both have sickle-shaped blades at the ends of their tails. There's a powerup above them.]

You've found two Andalites, one canonical! Your trusters are more efficient now.

[A powerup in a small recess in the ground]

You've found baby shoes (and baby). Your engine gets a little more powerful.

[Cueball and Megan facing each other]

Megan: The M.I.T. cloaking device only affects the electroweak and nucler forces. Gravity is tho odd one out, as usual.

[A powerup next to Megan]

You've found a friend. Your trusters are more efficient now.

• Shuttle Skeleton planet

[A small planet shaped like a spaceship from xkcd comic 2630: Shuttle Skeleton]

[A powerup next to left-hand engine]

A little upgrade works wonders on fuel efficiency. Your thrusters are more efficient now.

[A collectible at the tip of the ship's bow]

You've found a piece of space shuttle food!

• Roche Lobe Earth

[This is a distorted, drop-shaped Earth with oceans and continents of the northern hemisphere. There's the Moon close by. The distortion looks like if the Moon's tidal forces is pulling northern Atlatic Ocean really hard. Cueball is standing in the place of the southern U.S.A. There's a collectible off the California coastline.]

You've found a curious Humboldt squid

[Another collectible lies off the Japan coast]

You've found a bathyscaphe at the Marianas Trench!

[There's a collectible on the far side of the Moon]

You've found a wayward Roomba full of moondust

• Dark matter planet

[A small, irregular planet with a black center (normal planets have white centers) and an insciption "DARK MATTER" inside, repeated three times. On its surface there are two squirrels and Hairbun.]

Hairbun: I found it!

[There's a powerup anti-clockwise from Hairbun]

You've found a delicate music box. Your engine is a little more powerful now.