Editing 2234: How To Deliver Christmas Presents

This comic is [[:Category:Book promotion|yet another]] fun way to promote [[Randall|Randall's]] new book, ''[[How To]]'', released on September 3, 2019, reminding people to buy it as a {{w|Christmas present}} that could be given to a friend or family member. Giving Christmas presents is a way to celebrate the holiday of {{w|Christmas}}, celebrated in the United States on December 25th. Randall always releases a [[:Category:Christmas|Christmas comic]] on the 25th or close to that day. Having one this early is thus different, and another Christmas related comic came out two comics later; see [[2236:_Is_it_Christmas%3F#Trivia|that comic's trivia section]].

The entire comic links to https://xkcd.com/how-to/, a description of his book and ways to order it. As always, the [[Header text#2014-07-23_-_what_if.3F_book_tour|entire picture is a link]], even though he has made the {{w|URL}} blue as if it was a clickable link. Of course, it will also work if you actually click on the URL. At least in this comic he does state that you can click anywhere on the comic, and if that doesn't work, he also gives the URL. Many people would probably still click on the blue link-like line, having not read his text. But the objective of getting them to the [https://xkcd.com/how-to/ xkcd page about How To] would have been obtained.

The rest of the comic discusses how to "deliver" this Christmas present. As mentioned in the comic, the "traditional" way that parents teach their kids about Christmas and Christmas gift giving is with the story of {{w|Santa Claus}}, a man who lives on the North Pole, who delivers gifts each Christmas Eve by riding a sleigh pulled by reindeer. He is usually depicted entering a house to deliver gifts by going down the home's chimney. Every year, the {{w|NORAD Tracks Santa|North American Aerospace Defense Command (NORAD) tracks Santa}} as he delivers gifts around the world.  Although we take that story for granted, it is no less ridiculous than the alternatives this comic explores, and in fact considerably more so, as there is no reason to believe NORAD can detect Santa in flight given his various other legendary stealth techniques.{{Citation needed}}

Based on [https://www.fema.gov/previous-missile-impact-tests-wood-sheathing research by FEMA], Randall states the speed needed to throw a book-sized object through a window to be 25 mph (~40 km/h). Breaking a window is probably not an ideal way to deliver a gift, as the recipient likely would not be pleased with a hole in their window. If a house has a broken window, perhaps from a previous gift delivery, they might cover up the window with a piece of plywood. Randall notes the speed to throw a book-sized object through a piece of plywood to be 250 mph (~400 km/h), faster than a human can reasonably throw.  

An off-screen person mentions {{w|HTTPS}}, or Hypertext Transfer Protocol Secure, an extension of regular HTTP, used for secure communication. Cueball and this person believe that "paper" needs HTTPS, so that Cueball's original book can be "securely delivered" without being intercepted by third parties such as Black Hat.

The house is very detailed and in the windows are both a cat (typical click bait) and a different figure, perhaps Yoda or a Pikachu.

:For more questionable ideas for using science to solve problems, check out my new book, '''''How To!''''' Click on this comic or go to <font color="blue">xkcd.com/how-to</font>

:Randall: The traditional way to get Christmas presents into a house is to have a large reindeer-herding man slither down the chimney with them.

:Randall: But that's OK; there are other ways to get a gift into a house

:[The last segment has a large panel taking up the bottom half of the comic. At the bottom of this panel there are even two smaller comics which lie over this panel and break the bottom border of the panel. They relate to the information in the large panel. In the middle of this panel is a detailed drawing of a house. The tiles of the roof are all individually drawn (8 rows with about 23 tiles each for a total about 180 tiles). To the right on the roof top is a chimney indicated with a dotted line, showing where it is not present.  The front of the house has two small windows to the left, a door with door knob, in the middle of the house, with a two steps stair in front of it and a large window with three segments to the right. All three windows have curtains visible and are divided in two, a top and a bottom part On the top of the middle segment there is a handle for opening the windows, all five segments of them. In the window to the left sits a cat and in the central segment of the large window to the right sits Pikachu. The foundation of the house is drawn as 4 rows of bricks to the left (about 12 in each row) and three to the right (about 16 in each row, for 48 on both sides for a total of about 96). ]  

:'''1''' Even without chimneys, houses aren't airtight. If you vaporize the gift, parts of it will enter the house through the intake vents...

:[The one panel comic is on top of the large panel beneath the door to the house, but about three times as wide. In the panel, Megan and Cueball are reacting to statement 1. Cueball is walking away from her to the right.]

:[To the right of the house a gift wrapped present is flying towards the large window, with five lines indicating its speed and direction. Beneath the book is a line indicating the ground away from the house. There is a large segment of text surrounding the book on the three sides away from the house. Above the present next to the dotted-lined chimney is a large white number 2 inside a black circle. Then follows text which goes out to the edge of the panel, and this text continues down to the level of the book where it then only continues to the right of the speed lines. And then finally two lines of text are beneath the book above the ground next to the house.]

:'''2''' The critical momentum necessary for a projectile to break glass is around 4 kg*m/s. (40 for ½" plywood.)

:But if they’ve put up plywood shutters, you’ll need 250mph+ delivery speeds.

:[Finally beneath the house and text segment 2, there is a large white number 3 inside a black circle adjacent to the top right of the segment 1 panel comic. Next to this is the final text segment in this panel. Beneath this text is yet another comic, this time in five panels referring to the text, where the panels also break the lower border of the large panel.]

:[The five panel comic is on top of the large panel but beneath the text segment 3. ]

:[Black Hat opening a box with one hand while having his own book under the other arm.]

 

:[The book cover is open, the pages from the original book have been removed and are interchanged with those from Black Hat’s book, two arrows indicating the switch.]

 

:[Black Hat carrying a closed box.]

 

:[Cueball going down to retrieving the package from the bottom of a three step stairs.]

 

:[Cueball is standing next to the open box reading the book.]

:Cueball: ...Ugh, real-life content injection.  

:Off-screen voice: We need HTTPS for paper.

*The equation in the comic is incorrect, although the approximate result is correct

***Assuming the book weighs about 0.8lbs (360 g) this would give a speed of 11.1 m/s = 40 km/hour = 24.86 mph ≈ 25 mph.