1258: First

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First

Title text: Fortunately, exactly zero other annoying internet behaviors have developed during this time.

Explanation

Cueball is commenting on the urge some people have to be the first to make a comment on any given posting (be it a blog post or a youtube video or some other commentable content), and to obnoxiously point out that they have made the first comment. This often manifests as the poster simply posting the word "First" without contributing any actual content to the discussion. Cueball appears glad that the practice seems to be slowly dying out. However, someone (Offscreen) is worried he will jinx it, only encouraging more people to do so.

The title text ironically states that no new annoying internet behaviours have emerged since the "first post" trend began which would continue to annoy users: a fact which is clearly wrong to anyone who spends a length of time on the internet^{[citation needed]}.

Transcript

[Cueball is typing at a computer.]

[Cueball is sitting at a computer.]

Cueball: After a couple of unbearable decades, the "First Post" thing seems to be dying a quiet death.

Offscreen: Shh. You'll jinx it.

 add a comment! ⋅  add a topic (use sparingly)! ⋅  refresh comments!

Discussion

First! Edo (talk) 04:28, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

This is a wiki, not some xkcd reader's blog. GameZone (talk) 04:30, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

(it's called a joke) Edo (talk) 04:38, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

I thought it was funny. 75.37.205.50 07:42, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

I actually would have been slightly disappointed if someone hadn't made a "First!" comment for this particular comic. Only slightly, though, because that would mean I would've been able to do it. 66.87.67.175 18:30, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

Personally, I considered putting "InB4 someone says 'First'!!!", and thus probably annoyed both the "First"-likers and the Meme-haters. However, I left it too long to work out if I ought to. ;) 178.106.190.241 23:07, 2 September 2013 (UTC)

Ha! I was going to do the same thing. --Druid816 (talk) 07:58, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

When I saw today's comic on XKCD.com, I came here just to check if someone made a "First!" comment in comic's discussion page. 78.205.5.80 08:13, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

Yep, I wanted to come here and post "first!" I thought that would be fun and original. Porkypine (talk) 14:50, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

I also only came by to make sure the first thing in Discussion was "First," as is appropriate.

I agree it is likely Megan offscreen, but can we be sure? 83.227.33.35 09:57, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

Is Megan the canonical name for the long-haired brunette? Interesting... 188.76.190.204 12:10, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

Yes. See 159:_Boombox --Rael (talk) 14:51, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

I corrected the indents, dont be mad at me :) 188.76.190.204 12:10, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

Can someone explain what it means? I first guessed it was the proliferation on the "exactly zero" sentence, but it can also means "not comments at all". 188.76.190.204 12:10, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

He is being ironic because there have been so many annoying internet behaviours have come about. 184.66.160.91 13:09, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

Could also be self referencing, as massive use of irony can be considered an annoying internet behaviour. --132.230.150.44 13:13, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

If someone comes with a new annoying behavior, it will be the first! 179.219.106.94 14:20, 30 August 2013 (UTC)

I get that there are annoying Internet behavior, and idiocy on the Web is pretty much unavoidable, but are there any new, specific behaviors that we can put in the explanation rather than just telling people how obvious it is? (I'm not just complaining, if it came across that way. I would offer examples if I could think of any.) 98.166.43.28 22:29, 30 August 2013 (UTC)DBrak

I make $205,392 a day part time sitting at home on the computer. I didn't know it could be so easy! Check out my website to find out more! 108.184.110.140 16:27, 4 September 2013 (UTC)

For starters, how bout those Youtube commenters? "Justin Bieber suxorz", "49 JB fans disliked this vid", "Metal = shit, rap = awesome", etc. Diszy (talk) 00:16, 31 August 2013 (UTC)

Youtube memes could fill a thread alone. How about "thumbs up if still listening to this in 2013", or "57 people [number of negative votes] don't like good music". But I think more generic internet behavior was intended, like Rickrolling, ending dubiously spelled words with (sp?) rather than use a spell checker, any number of annoying and overused acronyms and letter/number substitutions, etc.

"Exactly zero" is often used in dubious arguments. "The odds of that working are exactly zero." gijobarts (talk) 07:08, 2 September 2013 (UTC)

That sounds like a dubious argument. It is more often used when the point someone has made is clearly, indisputably and entirely wrong. "The government is trying to kill us with chemtrails!". "No, it really isn't." Except you would say 'the chances of that being true are exactly zero' thing. 108.162.219.58 20:25, 4 February 2014 (UTC)

I really don't see a need for the 'List of annoying Internet habits developed after "First"' section. 108.162.216.71 07:44, 12 January 2014 (UTC)

tl,dr. 108.162.219.58 20:25, 4 February 2014 (UTC)

The need was to suppress a ^{[citation needed]} tag. See [1]. Xhfz (talk) 21:43, 4 February 2014 (UTC)

First!^{[citation needed]} PoolloverNathan (talk) 16:18, 20 January 2021 (UTC)

'Fun' exercise: Go to any video that was posted within the last few minutes, go to the comment section and click 'newest first'. Scroll down and it will be flooded with people saying 'first', and the chances are that no one is right. I'm sure most people reading this already know about this, but whatever. Beanie (talk) 14:03, 19 March 2021 (UTC)