3237: Husband and Wife

Husband and Wife

|< < Prev #3237 (April 24, 2026)

Title text: Borat came out twenty years ago this year--closer to the breakup of the Soviet Union than to today--but it honestly feels like it's been even longer, somehow.

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Explanation

This is one of 68 incomplete explanations: This page was created recently by MAH BAAT. Don't remove this notice too soon. If you can fix this issue, edit the page!

Megan and Cueball are discussing the phrases that married couples use to refer to each other, traditionally "my husband" and "my wife". Megan thinks it sounds too traditional to either refer to a spouse as a possession or to use the term "husband" (unclear which meaning is meant).

Cueball, on the other hand, isn't bothered as much by this implication than by the association with 2006 film Borat. Borat had a distinct, cringy way of saying "my wife", which Cueball can't get out of his head when he uses the phrase.

Megan's concern may be a little overblown. "My" isn't only used to denote possession, it's also often used to refer to a close association. For instance, 'my mother', 'my friend', 'my teacher' or 'my cleaner' almost never imply ownership. This construction is not only used for people, for example, a student or employee may refer to "my school" or "my company", and people often say "my town" to refer to the place where they live, without any concern over the speaker 'owning' any of them.

On the other hand, Cueball has a serious problem -- it's hard to forget that earworm. The title text points out that the 20 years from the movie's release to the publication of this comic is longer than the 15 years from the breakup of the Soviet Union to the movie (Kazakhstan was a former member of the USSR). This could be considered one of the comics where Randall makes people feel old, even if this time unintentionally. Coincidentally enough, Cueball uses a 'cringy ghost' as a descriptor for how annoying it is - Yet strange & random ghosts have been referred to before on xkcd.

Transcript

[ Megan & Cueball are talking, standing next to each other]

Megan: I still feel a little weird saying the phrase "my husband".

Megan: It makes me feel so traditional, like a Victorian gossip.

[Megan and Cueball still standing next to each other]

Cueball: Yeah, well, my plight isn’t much better.

Megan: What do you mean?

Cueball: What’s the most salient cultural reference for the phrase "my wife"?

[In the 3rd panel, Cueball has his hands raised]

Megan: Ughhhh, true.

Cueball: Even now, after two decades, when I speak of you I hear his voice, echoing through the halls of memory like a cringey ghost.

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Discussion

As a UKian, the most obvious reference here is Papa Lazarou in The League of Gentlemen. I assume that's not what Randall has in mind though (is LoG even a thing in the US?), and I have no idea what he might be thinking of. 82.13.184.33 15:37, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

Ah, you beat me to it. XKCD's been updating quite late in the day recently, so I thought I was safe not checking for a new strip until now - only to find that apparently it's been up for hours, and the ExplainXKCD comments have likewise. Yes, Papa Lazarou was my first thought. "You're my wife now!" :) 50.45.232.78 20:31, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

Hello Dave! You want to buy some pegs 2A02:C7C:AD6D:1900:643A:9B89:E674:2F22 17:42, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

It's in the title text: the movie "Borat". The title character's way of saying "my wife" became an earworm. Google it. Barmar (talk) 15:43, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

Ah - OK - don't think the title text was appearing when I was initially looking at it. Found it now. Doesn't mean anything to me. Papa Lazarou is still more salient, and much worse. 82.13.184.33 15:46, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

I immediately thought of Kimura-sensei from Azumanga Daioh. 70.40.121.82 16:03, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

Out of curiosity, does anyone actually use 'my wife/husband'? I've never heard about it before. Is it an American thing or something? GSLikesCats307 (talk) 18:41, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

In the UK it's more normal to use expressions such as "my better half" when talking about your spouse to somebody that doesn't know them, other than in that role 2A02:C7C:AD6D:1900:643A:9B89:E674:2F22 17:45, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

"My better half" can be said with genuine feeling or sarcasm, either way. Then there's "my other half", "(him/her) indoors", occasionally "my spouse", "my partner" (downplays the possibility of there being an actual full marriage/similar), "the first Mrs Surname" (usually for men who think it's funny to joke about a long-time relationship maybe ending one day), "the latest Mrs Surname" (for those, again, as well as any who have gone through that at least once), and "Mr" versions of those last two (on occasions). Also "the old man" (or lady/girl/lass, etc, to suit) and other regional variations. Rhyming slang versions include "the Trouble" (and Strife, ie. 'wife'), "pot" (and pan, 'old man'), even "Danger" (mouse, 'spouse') etc... 81.179.199.253 19:48, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

You forgot SWMBO, "She Who Must Be Obeyed" - from an old Edgar Rice Burroughs story, I believe (Edit: I was wrong. It's H. Rider Haggard.), and popularised by Rumpole the defence lawyer in the books/TV show. 50.45.232.78 20:31, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

To me (an American), the phrases "my husband" and "my wife" are so common and ordinary that I'm surprised to hear someone say they've never heard them before. Out of curiosity, where is it that people don't say things like "I went to that restaurant with my wife once," and what do they say instead (assuming that the person being spoken to doesn't know the wife's name)? --2601:404:C300:8040:7A4A:8D8C:3378:DA33 19:35, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

Gay 47.28.76.207 17:49, 24 April 2026 (UTC) Where does it say Megan is concerned with "My" because it's possessive? I think she's just commenting on how fancy and formal it sounds. Also, I don't see how the comic age plays into anything. I do think there is definitely a nod to the ghost in #1108 though. 170.187.32.34 17:50, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

I agree, it doesn't seem to be related to the possessive pronoun, but with the title "husband", which is deeply rooted in how traditional heteronormative families are constructed.

I also strongly doubt this is what concerns Megan. To me it's just the connotations to traditional, since outdated, family values that worries her. (This is probably why in the UK people appear to have stopped using the term, which must be an old thing as my parents who emigrated in the 80s also do it.)

Randall is a young pup. When someone says "my wife", the first thing I thought of wasn't Borat; it was Henny Youngman. 136.226.20.200 19:33, 24 April 2026 (UTC)

When I hear the phrase "my wife" I always end up finishing it with "Morgan Fairchild ... whom I've slept with" 66.212.184.170 20:05, 24 April 2026 (UTC)'

There are a few questions about usage. Just to clarify, most (many?) Americans say "My wife, Alice is... She likes... Alice does...." Americans tend to say "my wife" *once* in a conversation to make the listener familiar with the relationship. I've known very few people who *never* use the spouse's name, but who consistently say "My wife is... she likes... My wife does...". The last person I heard doing it was a xennial from South Africa, maybe 20 years ago. That feels extremely possessive and insecure to me, particularly given that I was friends with his wife. Still, I think the comic is only commenting on one-off usage, not this insecure, possessive usage. I haven't heard any slang for "spouse" ("better half", "ball and chain") from anyone born after 1960. 84.233.216.250 23:10, 24 April 2026 (UTC)
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