2862: Typical Seating Chart

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Typical Seating Chart

Title text: Now that airlines have started adding wheel locks to their drink carts, less than half of flights have one accidentally fall out through the hole.

Explanation

This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Created by a BOEING 777 PASSENGER SHOOTING A ROGUE A-10 WARTHOG - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. If you can address this issue, please edit the page! Thanks.

This comic shows a seating chart for an airplane, albeit with several unusual aspects not normally found on planes.

Label	Location	Notes
Cowcatcher	Front of plane	It is unclear whether this is meant for when the plane is taxiing, in which case this could "catch" any cows that are unlucky enough to be in the airport, or if this is meant to "catch" flying cows. Perhaps this is perhaps an oblique reference to the saying "when pigs fly" (meaning "never"). The term is normally used for the metal grate on the front of some trains, which is intended to deflect obstacles (including animals) rather than to capture them. The comic's depiction is similar to a train cowcatcher.
Please only pick these seats if you're a pilot	Cockpit	These are the cockpit seats, which should naturally only be used by pilots.[citation needed] However it's possible the airline might have a system like in 726: Seat Selection, where a passenger can pick the seat.
Main stage	First Class	This plane is apparently set up to hold a concert or other performance in flight.
Mosh pit		The inclusion of a mosh pit implies that the intended performances would be concerts featuring punk, heavy metal, or music of similar genres.
Various fancy classes		This is the first actual seating type (the fancy classes here often referred to as First Class and Business Class).
Some airplane companies waste this space	Wings	The comic suggests that the space in (or on?) the wings is unused. In reality the space in the wings is often used for fuel, and it is not safe to sit on the wing. [citation needed]
Lookout	End of wings	Presumably these passengers are required to look for any dangers to the plane. It is unclear what these dangers are, but it could be the pursuers mentioned in the description of the tail gunners.
Passenger has to pedal	Propellers	The passengers' pedaling is likely what causes two of the engines to work in this plane. It is unlikely that two passengers powering propellers can contribute significantly to the power of the other two jet engines.
Hole for trash	Middle of plane, just behind wings	A big hole right in the middle of the plane would be unlikely to exist in reality due to the danger of people or things falling through the hole (such as drink carts as mentioned in the title text) and possibly landing on other things, as well as the inability to maintain pressure in the cabin. Planes typically keep all trash on board until they land. There have been reported incidents of waste (from bathrooms) falling from airplanes in the form of "Blue Ice", though these are by accidental leaks rather than by design.
Sidecar	Left side of plane, behind wings	A sidecar is a small device that is attached to a main vehicle to provide additional support or space. It is unlikely that this would be needed for an airplane, and would likely make it less stable. The Rutan Boomerang and Blohm & Voss BV 141 are notable exceptions, but their sidecars are not for passengers.
Extra middle seats	Back of plane	Here the aisle moves to add two more seats in a row on one side. The 5 total seats are the aisle, three middle seats, and one window seat. This could actually exist, although it would be inconvenient to traverse. Middle seats are generally considered less desirable than aisle or window seats, so having extras might not typically be seen as an advantage. On the other hand, families might prefer being able to ride closer together, especially with smaller children -- and since the seats on the other side have no neighbors, this might be a desirable feature for solitary travelers (if they don't mind being so near potentially large traveling families with kids).
Bumper car seating	Just in front of tail	These seats are presumably not attached to anything, instead able to move freely like bumper cars. In reality, this would likely not be approved. Alternatively, the seats could simply be Bumper cars.
Penthouse	Tail (rudder)	A seat located in the tail, presumably higher than the rest. Some Etihad Airways planes actually have an apartment like cabin class called "the residence" that is sometimes called a penthouse by the media. This is located at the front of the plane, though, and it's unclear if this a reference to this.
Extra legroom	Hanging off of left side of tail	A common complaint with airplane seating is the lack of legroom. These seats do not have this problem - in fact, they have the entire atmosphere as legroom. Loss of shoes and/or glasses or other loose clothing could be an issue, as these seats appear to be outside the protection of the pressure-controlled main cabin, so passengers would bear the brunt of the wind.
Fighter escort	Separate, smaller plane	A small fighter jet flying alongside the main plane. Presumably some or all of the people inside are also passengers, but it is unclear if some of them might also have to operate the jet (especially since similar roles are given to passengers in the main plane).
Tail gunners (Must protect plane from pursuers but earn extra miles)	Tail (riding above the stabiliser)	People in these seats must protect the plane from any pursuers. The fact that these people are passengers is clear from the incentive of extra air miles. Frequent-flyer programs are a common system that airlines implement where passengers can receive special awards for flying often.

The title text expands on the hole, suggesting that it was a common occurrence for drink carts to fall down the hole until they implemented wheel locks. The lack of wheel locks would make it easier for a cart to slide towards the hole.

Transcript

This transcript is incomplete. Please help editing it! Thanks.

Typical Airliner Seating Chart

[Labeled items of a plane from front to back:]

[Front of plane:]

Cowcatcher

[Cockpit (2 seats):]

Please only pick these seats if you're a pilot

[First Class section (22 seats):]

Main stage

Mosh pit

Various fancy classes

[Wings (2 x 55 seats):]

Some airplane companies waste this space

[Ends of wings (2 x 1 seat):]

Lookout

[Propellers (2 x 1 seat):]

Passenger has to pedal

[Middle of plane, just behind wings:]

Hole for trash

[Left side of plane, behind wings (7 seats):]

Sidecar

[Back of plane (24 seats):]

Extra middle seats

[Just in front of tail (4 seats):]

Bumper car seating

[Tail (1 seat):]

Penthouse

[Hanging off of left side of tail (3 seats):]

Extra legroom

[Tail (4 seats):]

Tail gunners (Must protect plane from pursuers but earn extra miles)

[Separate, smaller plane to the right (14 seats):]

Fighter escort

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Discussion

where did everyone go? sucked out of the hole in the plane, perhaps? someone, i guess^{(talk i guess|le edit list)} 03:28, 2 December 2023 (UTC)

I hate how airlines try to charge you more, just because your body has nonstandard dimensions so you actually need more legroom. I also want vis-à-vis seating, that would make an hour long journey much more comfortable. Unbelievable how people even pay for spending an hour in such an environment.--172.69.151.93 14:30, 2 December 2023PerPers

Wait until you realise you have to pay taxes to the country you're in in most cases, and sometimes the country you're in is absolutely horrible and you'd pay anything to get out, even your sanity. 172.64.236.54 00:02, 3 December 2023 (UTC)

True, but are any of us sane? Psychoticpotato (talk) 21:00, 6 May 2024 (UTC)

Personally, I would sit in the tail gunner position because sitting in there would be cool, you get extra miles for sitting there, and being pursued by hostile planes is unlikely.Danger Kitty (talk)

However, I’d argue that the only sane universe for this comic to be in is this one, and so being pursued by rocs is probable. 172.68.1.158 (talk) 14:27, 4 December 2023 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

There used to be a flash game where the player flew a fighter jet protecting air force one agains farm animals including cows. Might the cowcather refer to that? (I forgot the name of the game. It was a bit ‘over the top’. “someone set us up the chicken bomb” and phrases like that. __172.71.182.220 10:00, 3 December 2023 (UTC)

I think "main stage" is a pun on multistage rockets? 172.70.46.96 23:14, 3 December 2023 (UTC)

That was my first thought as well. Brian (talk) 22:15, 4 December 2023 (UTC)

The "Fighter Escort" looks like it could be an F-15 because of the dual engines, vertical tails, and underwing drop tanks. 172.69.71.147 (talk) 19:34, 4 December 2023 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)