3221: Landscape Features

Landscape Features

|< < Prev #3221 (March 18, 2026)

Title text: 'Well, there's speculation that it's due to a mantle hotspot.' --a geologist who's trying to cover up the fact that they didn't hear your question

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Explanation

This comic is a map of the United States, purporting to explain some of the most significant elements of the landscape in each region. For each area it names one major geological or human mechanism (plate tectonics, erosion, farming, etc.) which it claims is responsible for the majority of interesting formations and features.

Many of these causes are summarized in a single word answer, which is overly-simplistic when trying to explain a complex landscape. A few phrases are longer, but still don't actually explain much, and some areas are just labeled "geology", which is distinctly lacking in explanatory power.

The title text plays off the fact that a large part of geology is concerned with activity in the mantle, so explaining some geologic feature by saying "there's speculation that it's due to a mantle hotspot" does not give much information. The suggestion is that this would let a distracted geologist buy time while responding to a missed question. Many of Earth's seemingly out-of-place features (e.g., Hawaii hotspot, Iceland, the Snake River Plain in Idaho, etc.) form from such mantle hotspots, so it's an easy go-to explanation for many of the geological features people are often most curious about.

This map with subdivisions follows up on a number of prior (non-cursed) maps representing (supposed) geographical splits of some conversational outcome or other, such as 1407: Worst Hurricane and 2108: Carbonated Beverage Language Map.

Table of regions

Location	Description	Explanation
Adirondack Mountains	???	The Adirondack Mountains are made of billion-year-old rock but were uplifted relatively recently, within the last 5–10 million years. They’re still rising today despite being far from any plate boundary, forming a dome with no clear tectonic cause, thus the "???" due to an ongoing mystery as to their formation.
Most of northern conterminous U.S.	glaciers	During the Last Glacial Period, this area was covered by an ice sheet that left its marks on the landscape, in the form of moraines, eskers, glacial erratics, etc. This is most notable in Wisconsin where bluffs were formed due to the glacier movement.
Appalachian Mountains	continents colliding	The Appalachian Mountains formed roughly 480 to 300 million years ago through a series of continent-continent collisions, culminating in the assembly of the supercontinent Pangaea. The primary collision involved ancestral North America (Laurentia) crashing into Gondwana (Africa/South America), resulting in a Himalayan-scale mountain range.
Mississippi and Ohio River Basins	rivers	The Mississippi River's geology has a complex, 70 million year history involving massive sediment deposition, glacial activity, and tectonic shifting. Formed mostly by melting glaciers ~12,000 years ago, it drains a vast, shifting basin, depositing millions of tons of sediment in a massive delta and creating a vast, shifting alluvial plain. The Ohio River's geology is similar.
Southeastern U.S.	farming	Landscape changes from cotton production in the United States, due to the presence of the Black Belt (geological formation).
Southern Florida	ongoing disputes between limestone and water	Florida is a vast karst landscape formed by the dissolution of underground limestone and dolostone bedrock by acidic rainwater, resulting in a terrain characterized by sinkholes, springs, caverns, and disappearing streams. This soluble bedrock, formed from ancient marine deposits, covers much of the state, directly connecting surface water to the Floridian aquifer system.
Southern Missouri / Northern Arkansas	geology	The Ozark Mountains, which are composed primarily of ancient limestone and dolomite, form a rugged landscape characterized by hills, caves, and springs. Prolonged erosion of these soluble rocks has produced extensive karst features, including sinkholes and underground rivers.
Great Plains	farming	The lack of other major events left the terrain relatively level, and areas were historically shaped by either herds of bison or indigenous agriculture, both limiting the growth of forests. "Farming" is likely a reference to the more recent mix of large-scale crop farming (especially staples like wheat and corn) and herding (bison replaced by cattle).
Central Idaho / Yellowstone	a supervolcano	The Snake River Plain is an area of high-elevation flat plain in the otherwise contiguous Rocky Mountains. It was formed by the movement of the continental plate over the Yellowstone Hotspot.
American West surrounding Idaho / Yellowstone	geology	3162: Heart Mountain
Immediately off of West coast up to the Four Corners	volcanoes	A combination of various volcanic fields of different origins, including Cascade Volcanoes in the Pacific Northwest, Albuquerque volcanic field in New Mexico, San Francisco volcanic field in Arizona, and San Juan volcanic field in Colorado.
Eastern Washington	megafloods	Most likely a reference to the Missoula floods and the Bonneville flood, a series of floods caused by glacial ice dam failures causing massive lakes to flood large regions of present-day eastern Washington. These floods actually continued all the way to the Pacific Ocean, altering the shape of the Columbia River Gorge and flooding much of the Willamette River in western Oregon. The comic may have simplified these to avoid bisecting the adjacent zones along the coast.
West Coast	a plate tectonic speedrun	Most likely a reference to the significant tectonic activity on the western coast of the US, caused by the collisions of the Juan de Fuca plate, Pacific plate, and the North American plate, as part of the Ring of Fire.
Southwest Desert	water and time	The nearly 40 major sedimentary rock layers exposed in the geology of the Grand Canyon area range in age from about 200 million to nearly 2 billion years old. Uplift of the region started about 75 million years ago during the mountain-building event largely responsible for creating the Rocky Mountains. The opening of the Gulf of California around 6 million years ago enabled a large river to cut its way northeast from the gulf. The new river captured the older drainage to form the ancestral Colorado River, which in turn started to form the Grand Canyon. Wetter climates brought upon by ice ages starting 2 million years ago greatly increased excavation of the Grand Canyon, which was nearly as deep 1.2 million years ago as it is now.
Northern Alaska	geology	Northern Alaska geology is dominated by the Brooks Range (a major Paleozoic mountain belt) and the Arctic Slope sedimentary basin, containing rich Paleozoic-Mesozoic rock sequences. The region is part of the Arctic Alaska–Chukotka Microplate, shaped by Mesozoic tectonic shifts, including the Arctic Ocean opening and the Brooks Range uplift.
Aleutian Islands	volcanoes	The Aleutian Islands are a continuation of the Alaskan Aleutian Range, and form part of the Ring of Fire. Most of the islands in the chain bear signs of being formed by volcanoes, and many volcanic cones still exist on the islands today.
Southeast Alaska	glaciers	This part of Alaska (including Glacier National Park) and western Canada has many glaciers that are still carving the landscape.
Hawaiian island chain	volcanoes	Hawaii, including the Northwest Hawaiian Islands, and seamounts northwest of it were formed by a tectonic plate moving over a hotspot, with volcanoes erupting and forming land as it went. The entire chain can be seen here. Volcanic fog from the three active volcanoes on the Big Island can often be seen on neighboring islands.

Features of Each State, alphabetically

• Alaska: geology, glaciers, volcanoes
• Arizona: water & time, volcanoes
• Arkansas: geology, farming, rivers
• California: a plate tectonics speedrun, volcanoes, water & time
• Colorado: volcanoes, geology, farming
• Connecticut: glaciers
• Delaware: farming
• District of Columbia: either farming or plates colliding
• Florida: farming, ongoing disputes between limestone & water
• Hawaii: volcanoes
• Idaho: a super volcano, geology
• Illinois: glaciers, rivers
• Indiana: glaciers, rivers
• Iowa: glaciers, farming, rivers
• Kansas: farming
• Kentucky: rivers, continents colliding
• Maine: glaciers
• Maryland: plates colliding, farming
• Massachusetts: glaciers
• Michigan: glaciers
• Minnesota: glaciers, farming, rivers
• Missouri: farming, geology, rivers
• Montana: geology, glaciers
• Nebraska: farming
• Nevada: volcanoes, geology, water & time
• New Hampshire: glaciers
• New Jersey: glaciers, farming
• New Mexico: volcanoes, geology, water & time, farming
• New York: glaciers, ???, continents colliding
• North Dakota: glaciers, farming
• Ohio: glaciers, rivers
• Oklahoma: farming, geology
• Oregon: a plate tectonics speedrun, volcanoes, mega floods, a supervolcano, geology
• Pennsylvania: glaciers, rivers, continents colliding, farming
• Rhode Island: glaciers
• South Dakota: glaciers, farming
• Texas: farming, geology, water & time
• Utah: geology, volcanoes
• Vermont: glaciers
• Virginia: continents colliding, farming
• Washington: Mega floods, a plate tectonics speedrun
• West Virginia: rivers, continents colliding
• Wisconsin: glaciers, rivers
• Wyoming: a supervolcano, geology, farming

Transcript

[A small panel showing Cueball pointing toward the left and Ponytail standing to his right overlaps the top of a much larger panel containing a map.]

Cueball: What's up with this weird landscape?

Ponytail: Oh, it was caused by ...

[The larger panel shows a map of the United States, with southern Canada, northern Mexico, and most of Cuba and the Bahamas visible as well. An inset at lower left shows Alaska along with part of northwest Canada, with a smaller inset showing Hawaii. International borders and coastlines are indicated in black, and state borders are indicated in gray. Red lines divide the United States into irregularly shaped zones (the red lines indicating zones do not cross into the neighboring countries, except in the Alaska inset), with each zone being labeled with red text. Each text label begins with "..." to indicate that it is the conclusion of Ponytail's sentence. The following are the labels used:]

[Main map:]

... a plate tectonics speedrun

... volcanoes

... megafloods

... a supervolcano

... geology

... water and time

... glaciers

... rivers

... continents colliding

... ???

... ongoing disputes between limestone and water

[On the main map, the label "... glaciers" appears three times in various places in the same contiguous zone that runs from Washington state to Maine. The label "... farming" appears twice, representing two separate zones, one that runs from Montana to Louisiana and the other that runs from New Jersey to Mississippi. The label "... geology" appears twice on the main map, representing two separate zones, one that runs from Washington state to Texas and the other being a roughly circular region mostly in southern Missouri and northern Arkansas.]

[Alaska inset:]

... geology

... volcanoes

... glaciers

[Hawaii inset:]

... volcanoes

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Discussion

F1rst P0st!!! R128 (talk) 17:27, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

First Times 82.13.184.33 09:14, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

The ???? in New York is probably the Adirondack Mountains:

About 10 million years ago, the region began to be uplifted. It has been lifted about 7,000 feet (2,000 m) and is continuing at about 0.08 inches (2 mm) per year, which is greater than the rate of denudation. The cause of the uplift is unknown, but geologists theorize that it is caused by a hot spot in the Earth's crust.[18] A recent study has revealed a column of seismically slow materials about 30 to 50 miles (50 to 80 km) deep beneath the Adirondack Mountains,[20] which was interpreted to be the upwelling asthenosphere contributing to the uplift of the mountains.

Zzzt (talk) 17:58, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

Geology being the cause of geological events is a tautology.--Henke37 (talk) 18:26, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

It's only a tautology where the plates are separating. It's a "compressology" where they're colliding, etc. ;) 81.179.199.253 21:36, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

conterguous* 137.25.230.78 20:34, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

I wonder if we should have a category for Isogloss. (Whether isoseme or some other variation.) I added in the two others 'of this basic illustrative nature' that I remembered off the top of my head, but I think there might be more. 81.179.199.253 21:33, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

This page should be in Category: Comics with color 50.47.110.240 21:05, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

I feel like comic 3141 is worth a mention here, but I'm not sure where to put it. MrCandela (talk) 22:49, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

Added to the Adirondock row. Fephisto (talk) 00:12, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

This explanation, and working on it, absolutely taught me more about US geology than I learned in school. 2603:800C:1200:596A:7154:D390:7A60:3197 08:29, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

I headered-up the table, to be consistent with the list-subheader. Also rearranged (and bulleted) the list of states (and district, but there are less than 51 lines, so obviously still some 'unstated' (NPI!) ones, not yet sure which) alphabetically, as that's going to be the main referencing reason here (aded "sortable" to the table - mostly for on-demand label-sorting, not so useful in the other columns, but not bothered making them unsortable again). Moved the reference to the other similar comics to the end of the unsubheadered Explanation section (post title-text blurb), as with usual narrative order in such cases.
You are welcome to (re-)redo, naturally. The by-state list could easily be a table, too, for resorting purposes (though not much benefit if it's already sorted by its one and only useful 'key' value), or it could be remade as a 'tick grid'/confusion-matrix of 51 'states' against <however many> labels (if you think something like that that helps). ...but probably too much work for too little gain, I think, having already gone through some of these ideas myself, but YMMV. 82.132.237.49 12:45, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

Currently missing are: Alabama; Georgia; Louisiana; Mississippi; North Carolina; South Carolina; Tennessee. From which I deduce that someone has an irrational dislike of states ending in 'a' and states with an excess of double letters. 82.13.184.33 14:57, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

wow, there are a lot of geology comics in the past year or so. I think Randall has a new interest R128 (talk) 13:11, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

Hotspots create almost-constantly active volcanos, so they are a very bad go-to explanation. Shirluban 147.161.153.84 14:09, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

Sections to explain

I'm not a geologist, so I don't know how to answer these questions, but I will leave this template here to eventually be copied into the article:

Location	Description	Explanation
Adirondack Mountains	???
Most of northern U.S. border	Glaciers
Appalachian Mountains	Continents colliding
Mississippi river basin	Rivers
SE U.S.	Farming
Southern Florida	Ongoing disputes between limestone and water
Southern Missouri/Northern Arkansas	...geology
Central column of U.S.	Farming
Central Idaho/Yellowstone	A supervolcano
Eastern Washington	A megaflood
West Coast	...a plate tectonic speedrun.
SW	Water and time
Northern Alaska	...geology
Aleutians	Volcanoes
Hawaiian island chain	Volcanoes

Fephisto (talk) 18:59, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

...uh, why don't I just copy it into the article blank for now, actually?Fephisto (talk) 19:00, 18 March 2026 (UTC)

New here, and don't know the formatting, but the table is currently missing the Cascade and Sierra Nevada "Vocanoes" region, though it's pretty self-explanatory. 136.56.99.85 (talk) 21:29, 18 March 2026 (UTC) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Got it. Fephisto (talk) 00:12, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

Also missing the “…geology” section surrounding the supervolcano. 146.115.160.214 (talk) 21:58, 18 March 2026 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Got it.Fephisto (talk) 00:11, 19 March 2026 (UTC)
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